this is by far the best interview i ever saw

Sunday ramblings

We’re not really far into the solo era, but I just feel like by way of observation and reading/watching interviews lately, that it’s clear that them being solo artists is truly what’s best, and I don’t want them to ever go back to being a band like they used to. 

Just to brush on a few things.. 

Liam said recently that in 1D they were meant to show relentless enthusiasm at all times, and never discuss any negative aspects of their experience - which we as fans saw and got annoyed over several times… Shit went down that was never acknowledged and/or apologized for. Lima also mentioned that they never stopped to celebrate what they’d done. It was non-stop. Harry noted a similar thing in his RS interview when he said that the 1D tours were like a Wes Anderson movie. Cut. Cut. New location. Quick cut. New location. Cut. Cut. Show. Shower. Hard cut. Sleep. (which we all saw.. Like, Zayn developed an eating disorder whilst in the band, Liam had serious issues with alcohol, the partying, the drugs (hi weed scandal) like, there was so much stuff going on at certain points.)  Harry also mentioned in the doc that after 5 years of pressure, he finally didn’t feel any of it. And he admitted in another interview that he realized he was exhausted. (The fact that you could never truly pick up on that because he always gave 110% at every show makes me just in awe of his loyalty and work-ethic.) Hats off to Niall, Liam and Louis too, they all worked so fucking hard. Niall even said that he wasn’t as exhausted as the rest of them at the end, like, what kind of superhuman lol.. 

I remember Jeff mentioning that he was baffled by Harry’s writing talent, and how he realized that the Harry in One D was kind of the digitized Harry. Almost like a character. And like Harry said: “I wanted to write my stories, things that happened to me. The number-one thing was I wanted to be honest. I hadn’t done that before.” That says it all.. I also feel like in the last year or so, it was so clear that Harry was ready for his own career… On the last tour the interactions with the other boys were minimal, esp compared to the tours before. Journos/writers noted the same thing in their concert reviews. He was the one that was a little outside of it all. Watching what happened between Louis and Harry’s friendship throughout the years because of the larries was straight up awkward as hell. The months before Zayn left was awkward to watch, and after he left, Lilo became super close. Niall got along with all of them I feel, but even now, Harry is the odd one out. He never used to hang out with them outside of 1D obligations and I don’t think they see or talk to Harry much now either. (despite what Niall says to please 1D fans :p.) When you think about it, Harry’s sooooo fucking different from esp Louis and Liam. But let me also make it clear that I think Harry loved being in 1D. Unlike others, (ahem Zebra) he will never bite the hand that fed him. He’ll never discredit that time.

From MM and onwards, Lilo teamed up in writing sessions and got their songs through. (Def prob easier as a twosome.) Louis and Lima are loud and opinionated too, so I can only imagine some of those song discussions. (Not taking away from Lilo’s songwriting talent here, just looking at the big picture). Harry noted recently that he felt interrupted in the band as well. (super surprising lol) Interviews were often a mess, and the only one who had respect for Harry in those scenarios were Niall imo. 

After Harry left the band he took some time off to feel bored he said, but realized fast that he was dying to be in the studio again, ‘cause he had so much he wanted to say. And I think a huge part of that stemmed from him not being able to take time on lyrics and really write. An album a year, writing on the road, Lilo teaming up, with other hired writers putting their touches on each song, I think all of it hindered him to an extent. And Harry said in a recent interview that it def was weird to go into a writing session with strangers trying to be honest. And I think that’s partly why he was so anxious to get back in the saddle, why he was ready fairly quickly and why he was the first one to drop a solo album. He’d been writing for himself, planning, and building up for that moment for a long time. Maybe since he proposed the idea of them taking a break in late 2014. 

Another thing worth noting, in the Behind The Album doc is that he was SO fucking excited that he was in charge. His ideas were listened to. He was the boss, for the first time ever. When they said “Let’s first do Harry’s idea for” and Harry went “yeah, and then we’ll do Harry’s idea for something else, then after that, we’ll do another one of Harry’s ideas!”, like yeah he was joking around, but I also feel like that said so much.. And we can all get it, being in a band, like he said, every single decision was made in a democracy, and it was just time for him to make the desicions. To be a little scared.

And everyone can see the pure joy that’s Harry now. He’s soooooo happy. On stage, in interviews, everywhere. He has an energy now that is just amazing to see, he’s got that extra little spark that I didn’t see the last year or so in 1D. In Harry’s own words: “I’m having the time of my life working this [solo career] out.” and that’s clear as day. I also thought of when Cameron Crowe said that Harry couldn’t WAIT to start his interview with him. That he called him up and was SO enthusiastic, like practically giddy. And this quote from Harry is so heart-warming too. “There was something about playing the album and how happy I was that told them, [his parents] ‘If all I get is to make this music, I’m content.” ❤️ Like he stated in the doc too, he’s totally okay with not being on the level that he was in 1D again. 

And it goes for all the boys you know. I don’t follow their careers closely, but I’ve noted that they’ll all said they’re really happy that they went on this break and that they’re loving the freedom and being solo now, so it’s all good. They all look happy and well. And they’re all doing good which is nice to see. 

So yeah, just some Sunday night thoughts :) 

#58- “I’ve been in love with you my entire life. Ever since the first day I met you.” Prompt

From @wweismyguiltypleasure - “And 58 with Corey Graves.”

TAG LIST!- @allgirlswrestlingclub @ilovesamizaynn 

Corey fricken Graves.

That’s all I ever heard about when I debuted. How I was the female Corey Graves. Tattoos all over, the “I don’t give a shit” attitude, the heel persona. Even the announcers would say it! It didn’t help that we were both from Pittsburgh either. The only upside was that by the time I had debuted, Corey was put on the shelf and became a commentator for NXT and Raw. I mean I did watch his matches, he was damn good, and its a shame he got injured so early in his career. But when I debuted, I swear when I got to the top of the ramp, I snuck a glance over at him and felt my heart stop. I tried to ignore the feeling and blamed it on my nerves for my first match.

Well, this feeling continued each time I had a match. The quick glance over at him had me feeling some time of way. When I earned my title opportunity, I found myself going to him for advice.

   “Graves, can I talk to you for a sec?”

 He puts down his papers and looks at me, somewhat annoyed. His eyes lock on mine and I feel the the world around me stops. This is the first time I truly get to see his face, and those gorgeous eyes. I quickly regain myself.

   “I-I just need some advice. I mean you know I have my first title shot tonight and I just need some last minute advice. You were a champ and a damn good one at that, so I would really appreciate it.”

I start picking my at my nails, a nasty habit I have when I get nervous. He glances down at my hand and takes it in his. I feel the heat rush through my body. I’m surprised I am even still standing up right.

   “Listen Y/n, you know better than anyone that you have what it takes to win. Don’t get inside your head. Let the magic happen. Watching you these past few months in the ring, I really do see why you get called the female version of me. Now you have seen I did with my opportunity, do the same with yours. Go kick some ass out there.”

He smiles at me and pats my hand before grabbing his papers and heading off to the commentators table. I stand there in awe. The music indicating the start of the Takeover shakes me out of my fog. 

1,2, 3! *Ding Ding*

   “Here’s your winner and NEW NXT Women’s Champion, Y/n!!!”

The crowd goes wild as I clutch the title in my hands. I fall to my knees and let all the tears fall from my eyes. I look up smiling and over the roar of the crowd, I hear Corey on commentary.

   “Tom, Y/n has just ended Askua’s year long streak!! This right here is the future of the women’s division!” 

I stand up slowly, having the ref help me, and raise my title over my head. I steady myself and the ref lets me go to check on Askua. I spin around to show my love to my NXT universe. When I turn to face the ramp, I see Tom and Corey standing up, clapping. And I swear, I saw a tear fall from Corey’s eyes, but it’s too far away for me to truly tell.

The next week on NXT, I sit down for my interview with Corey, about becoming the new champion.

   “Please welcome my guest at this time, the new NXT Women’s Champion, Y/n. Y/n thanks for coming.”

   “Thanks for having me Corey.”

   “Now last week, we saw you take down the longest raining NXT Women’s Champ, Askua. How did it feel to win your first title from, if I am not mistaken, one of, if not the best women wrestlers we have ever seen.”

   “Oh, it was my hardest match to date. I’m banged up, I’m bruised, but I put up one hell of a fight. I take nothing away from Askua, she is a damn good wrestler. I mean her executions and transitions are flawless. I watched and studied her matches to try and prepare myself.”

   “Are you prepared for when Askua comes for her rematch for the title?”

   “I say bring it on. We stole the show at Takeover: San Antonio, and we can do it again. She names the time and place and I am ready.”

   “You sound pretty confident you can beat her again.”

   “Oh, I know I can. I am the first woman to beat her cleanly. No DQ’s, no count-outs, nothing. It was me. And why shouldn’t I be confident? I got some advice from a vet before my match. He said “Listen Y/n, you know better than anyone that you have what it takes to win. Don’t get inside your head. Let the magic happen.” and I took that advice to heart.”

   “There you have it, a very confident champ looking forward to her rematch with the Empress of Tomorrow, Askua,”

When the camera cuts, Corey leans over and smiles.

   “I wonder who gave you that advice?”

I let out a small laugh and lean toward him.

   “This vet who I really like, and gets me. Corey, I have been in love with you my entire life. Ever since the first day I met you. Now I know I haven’t known you my entire life, but I feel like I have. And I know you may not like me back-”

I am cut off by Corey’s lip on mine. The kiss is short, simple, but filled with so much passion. I pull away from Corey’s lips slowly, smiling slightly.

   “I take that as you love me back?”

He smirks and pulls me back in for another kiss, smiling against my lips.


So here is my 1st Corey Graves fic!! I absolutely loved writing this one. Being from Pittsburgh, I always will have a soft spot for Corey Graves and I really wanted this to be real lol.

Again, I just want to say that I am so thankful for all of you guys, my followers, and people who just like or even read my work. As a writer, it means the world to me and hope you all know that <3

So back to the task at hand. For the Prompts: WWE- give me a wrestler and a number and anything you want included and I will do it (unless the number has already been taken). Writing- Give me any character, any fandom, number and whatever you would like in it (unless the number is already taken). Inbox, or message me your ideas. I would love to hear them :)

I also want to point out that these prompt lists are not my original and I did reblog them from other people.

If anyone wants tagged in any upcoming drabble, please let me know! Even if you didn’t see them on the previous list, just let me know the superstar and i’ll let you know if I have one lined up for them. Also, should I start calling these imagines?? Or stick to drabbles? Please, Please let me know!

Feel free to talk to me too! I love a good conversation and I love meeting new people!

See you guys very soon for the next drabble/imagine!

Ciao loves <333

Island Escape: Part 13

Originally posted by wanjacks

JJ Project Series

Warning: Contains smut and violence in some chapters

Teaser  Part 1  Part 2 Part 3  Part 4  Part 5 Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 12  Part 14  Part 15  Part 16  Part 17

Keep reading

Loneliness is a Matter of Accretion

Check out what I saw at the grocery store today. The corrections never, ever stop. This is one of the few things I will miss when I move.

Here are some items of self-interest. 

Bad Feminist is out on August 5. You are warmly encouraged to pre-order.

There is an interview with me up on Elle 

Flavorwire has a list of the ten best works of fiction so far in 2014. I concur with all of the choices. 

OPRAH! (Yes, again I mention this.) I have an essay in the September issue, which is also neat.

I was feeling kind of down about my recent cooking endeavors. The food was good but it was not memorable. I decided to make Smitten Kitchen’s penne with potatoes and rocket. First I had to Google, “What is rocket vegetable?” I learned it is arugula. Why not call it arugula? 

Did you know fingerling potatoes literally look and feel like fingers? Cutting those up wasn’t… a thrill but today, my “knifework” was better. Then I tossed the potatoes with olive oil and salt and pepper.

I do want to be clear on something. I have been writing a lot about loneliness and want but I’m not someone who thinks, “With love, my life will be complete.” I’m not desperate. I date more than I might let on, mostly because I don’t really want to write about things that don’t matter and most of the men I date do not matter and to call the time we spend together dating would be, well, a stretch. I’m just bored with it all. I’m mostly bored with lowering my standards. I have explored that to its fullest. It’s time to move on. I want something more and, I guess I feel this need to talk about that in this space. I’m not sure why. I am not normally prone to this kind of disclosure. 

The oven pre-heated to 400 degrees, I spread the fingerling potatoes on a baking sheet, and stuck them in the oven. The recipe called for fifteen minutes, but as we have discussed, my oven is a LIE OVEN. It took twenty-five minutes.

The thing is, loneliness is a matter of accretion. Nine years of living in very rural places, a lifetime of shyness and social ineptitude, these things make the loneliness build and build and it cloaks me, sometimes. For so long, I closed myself off from everything and everyone. Terrible things happened and I had to shut down to survive. I was cold, I’ve been told. You’ll notice how I often write stories about women who are perceived as cold and resent that.

I am not cold. I wasn’t ever cold. My warmth was hidden far away from anything that could bring hurt because I knew I didn’t have the inner scaffolding to endure any more hurt in those protected places. 

I am thirty-nine. I am like, thirteen. 

When the potatoes were ready, I sautéed an onion in olive oil. I used yellow onions because I cannot eat red onions. That is sad. I really love red onions.

I didn’t allow myself to feel anything, and now, slowly, I am beginning to feel everything and writing is the best way I can think of to handle so much fucking feeling.

A lot of what I’ve been talking about here isn’t merely about wanting a healthy, mutually satisfying longterm relationship as much as it is about needing more human connection of all kinds. I want more connection in my day to day life, in the places where I live and breathe.

I want those connections to matter. 

When the onions were softened pleasantly, I added arugula and spinach as well as basil and a good quantity of garlic. The recipe did not call for spinach or basil but I improvised. It’s impossible to get arugula around here. The only thing the grocery store had was an arugula/spinach mix. The basil I thought would complement the spiciness of the arugula. 

OMG. Did you see me speaking cooking right there???

Realness moment: I had a personal grooming incident today and that’s all I am going to say about that. 

I was really in my groove as I cooked tonight. I took my time. As I moved from one step to another, I reminded myself that doing this matters. Feeding and taking care of myself matter. I am worth this small consideration. 

This sounds kind of self-help-ish and hokey. I don’t mean it to. The problem with building walls is that eventually, you have to tear them down and bringing those walls down begins in the head and the heart, at least for me. I need to remind myself of these things every day so I don’t fall back into a dark place to which I have no desire to return. I need to remind myself of these things so I can take care of myself in this way and so I can go to the gym and hate every minute of it but know I am doing the right thing. I am doing this so I can feel more whole and alive someday.

When the spinach and arugula were lightly wilted, I added the potatoes to the mix. I was a bit skeptical because the dish seemed so carb-intensive.  On the adjacent burner, I boiled salted water and cooked the pasta. I had a dilemma though. I forgot to get penne at the grocery store. What to do? I looked in my cabinet, and lo, there was some overpriced angel hair pasta in there. Pasta is pasta, okay. You can shape it however you want but it comes from the same place and comes out the same way. 

I do have love in my life and it’s overwhelming and inescapable and complicated. It is what it is. That phrase can be trite but sometimes, it is also true. 

I tossed the potato and vegetables, then added the pasta, and tossed all of that together. You should know that it is very difficult to “toss” angel hair but I persevered here as well. Once that was all nicely mixed, I drizzled the works with fresh lemon juice. I was nervous about this part but I was committed to following through on this recipe and follow through I did. 

I have not historically been great at follow through. That is one of the things I need to work on most–seeing things to the end, being patient enough to see things to the end, trusting that certain moments in life will unfold as they should. The most human parts of me want it all! Right now! Exactly as I want and need! Reconciling the impossibility of such human want is also what I am doing when I write in this space. 

I must tell you that this was by far the most delicious dish I have ever made. I don’t know why but every single component (hehehe cooking talk) worked and was well prepared, she says, boastfully but a bit bashfully. The flavor combinations were like awesome kung fu in my mouth. My taste buds were all kung fu fighting. 

Part of what may have helped the cooking is that I pretended I was cooking for Oprah and my best friend and well, Gayle was invited too. 

We all have our amusements. 

I was talking with a dear friend today. She asked, “Does the person you love the most know all of your secrets?” I answered far more quickly that I could have predicted. I said, “Yes.”