this is all thats keeping me going

anonymous asked:

(I'm not sure if this is on anon or not bc of the update bare with me) hey roby! I was wondering if you had any tips on how to avoid always doing the same face when drawing people while still keeping the same style? Thank you in advance, love your art btw !

I’m the last person to ask on topic of avoiding the same face omg thats literally all i do and I hate myself for it sometimes, but its good that we’re aware of it! 

i guess the main thing you can do when drawing someone in particular is just use reference and study details of the person’s face and go from there. it comes with practice, and honestly depending on your art style it can be harder or easier.

but yea like i said I’m not the best user to ask cause I’m guilty of making a lot of my drawings look the same face-shape wise. 

Ok so the “Anon” hater is back...

They are flooding my inbox. I think they are obsessed with me…its a bit creepy actually. If this was real life, I would get a restraining order against them. Apparently they said they aren’t going to leave me alone and that they are going to keep sending me hate… shows how much of a life they have. Funny since they said previously “I am done with you and your shit” … APPARENTLY YOU’RE NOT!!

OH PS!! I did get your asks last night and I replied with screencaps of our past conversations! Just an FYI to you! 

Ok thats all! Staying strong here. Got my protection squad!! Not going to publish the hate unless I get really tempted to! Besides, I took the appropriate action ;) This constitutes as cyber bullying! Its disgusting and immature. But if there’s one thing this person wants, its attention! Anyhoo Lets get back to posts now!!  

SO AN IMPORTANT PSA

so i’m sure you’re wondering where i’ve been or not that’s fine – but lately i’ve been feeling overwhelmed with things and i’ve decided that i’m going to DROP ALL CURRENT ASKS AND THREADS.

the only things that i’m not dropping is the threads that i have with @joltastic and @toughspirit and the starter that i promised @erasureeyes 87 years ago.

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO KEEP A THREAD, please tell me. the only reason i’m dropping everything is because i’ve just been feeling overwhelmed with everything to the point to where coming on here i can’t focus and therefore it makes me unable to be active. so with a clean slate i feel like that would help me a lot.

this also means that i’m going to be posting a starter call soon and i’m going to plot with every person who likes that starter call. that way i can get things back on track. this isn’t because i don’t like the messages/threads. this is simply because i can’t focus because i’m panicking about all the things i need to respond to. i had 89 asks in my inbox and 23 drafted asks, along with 17 drafts and i just burnt out i guess. i’m really sorry and i’ll try to make it up to you guys in the future;;;;

an ink luigi turned into a soft luigi

I think, instead of telling kids ‘don’t do drugs, they’re bad’ we should show them the opiate withdrawal patient I had the other day

25 years old, in jail for god knows what, cops bring him in with a lac to his forehead from banging it on the wall repeatedly. He is already handcuffed so we put him in an isolation room, with sliding glass doors. Because he is in custody we take everything but the bed out of the room. 

Patient is screaming the whole time he doesn’t want to be there (same bro) with blood everywhere from the head lac. 

5min later, I hear this sickening crash, I’m pretty sure someone has just run head first into the glass doors, because mate I’ve done that before those curtains are assholes, so rounding the corner I see blood all over the glass door, patient still screaming he wants out but is now banging his head on the glass. 

It takes 4 security guards to hold this guy down, he is absolutely losing his shit, screaming and flailing and has no idea whats going on. Calling out for his mom, for Neil (???), for a sandwich, doesn’t know what day it is or just refuses to answer we can’t tell, pupils 4mm and sluggish but thats how it was when they brought him in, so security cuffs him to the bed so he can’t hit the wall. 

Fastforward 10 minutes and he has dislocated/broken his wrist trying to get out of the bed and to the door, he has puke and stool everywhere, refused to take the ativan so we gave midaz, but that didn’t touch him. 

This guy screamed from 2-7, we maxed out what we could give him for benzos and he was extraordinarily agitated and wouldn’t settle and was only in the beginning stages of withdrawals. It was terrifying, but the thing that got me was after screaming about how we took the 20′s (from his underwear??) he was quiet for a minute, I thought ‘shit the midaz finally caught up with him and now were gonna need to intubate’ but he then screams

“I don’t want to do this anymore, I don’t want to be on drugs anymore, I want this to stop, I want to be clean, please someone help me”

And thats what got me. This guy was 25, had his whole life ahead of him, but got caught up in drugs and it was going to kill him, and he wanted out, but withdrawals were so bad that it was easier to keep using. 

Fuck telling kids don’t do drugs. Show them what its like to try to stop, how all your friends die from OD, how you are one phonecall-not-made away from death yourself, how you get to be tied to a bed in the ER and your nurses need to apologize to other patients because you can’t stop screaming and just shit yourself and puked the cookie I gave you and your body is on fire. 

Don’t just tell them not to do it, because that doesn’t work, show them what its like to try to stop, because sometimes fear works better than facts. 

Note: Throughout the day we gave him 4 of ativan, 27.5 of Midazlolam and 12 of haldol, and this guy still was still agitated and screaming and 100% inconsolable, and by that time the doc was like ‘we can’t give him anymore, but lets transfer him out before he crashes’. It was a fucking time

general li mulan

okay so i LOVE mulan okay. as far as i’m concerned it’s a Perfect Movie and doesn’t need any fixing. but i was thinking today and -

- what if mulan didn’t go to war to save her father?

say her father is dead, okay, killed by the previous war. so she’s raised by her mother and grandmother, women who’s complacency and softness has been worn away by necessity. she needs to marry well, for her family’s sake, because her mother has refused the hand of every man who offered. but mulan is even more rough around the edges than before, is educated not only in books (her mother said men wouldn’t find smarts attractive and grandmother pointed out that men aren’t always around and off to school mulan went) but in the sword too, taught to her by her classmate, ping.

mulan is considered in the lower end of the upper class, coming from a family of military men and scholars and successful merchants. ping is near the top, the son or nephew of an advisor to the emperor. his family is very rich and very important, and the reason they become friends is because mulan manages to notice something about him that he’s been hiding from everyone else - he’s going blind.

not totally blind, enough to get around, but blind enough that reading is difficult and swordplay is even worse, although once he has it down he has it. ping is no fool, he’s not weak or bumbling. his eyes just don’t work. so mulan notices and confronts him about it. she promises to keep it a secret, and hey, she’ll even help him with his assignments by reading the books out loud and helping him study. but in return he must teach her the sword, must teach her about military and tactics. he agrees.

ping and mulan become very good friends and there’s some raised eyebrows about it but they are TOO far away in class for it to be inappropriate, so they make tutting sounds and disapproving faces and let it go.

then the draft happens. ping can’t go to war, he won’t survive it. not with his eyesight like it is. so mulan offers him a deal - she’ll go to war for him, in his place. in return, if she survives, he must marry her. if she dies he must take care of her family.

ping can’t make this kind of family decision on his own, so he goes to his mother and tells her everything, about the eyesight and how he’ll die if he goes and mulan’s offer. his mother says he must keep it a secret from his father, but agrees - if mulan fights in her son’s place and survives, a wedding will be arranged. either way, mulan’s family will be taken care of. ping will be sent to live with some cousins in the meanwhile.

“you’re not in love with me, are you?” ping asks, helping mulan saddle her horse in the middle of the night. she scoffs and rolls her eyes, “not even a little. but marrying you will make my family happy, and besides, you’re my best friend,” she says, smiling, “better you than some grabby old man.” he smiles and hugs her and says, “i’m not in love with you either. but don’t die out there. we have a wedding to plan.”

so mulan goes to the camp, pretending to be ping, and she’s a little bit less lost but things still go as they go. she’s educated and trained, so it’s not hard for her to pass as ping. shang is keeping a special eye on her, thinking that she’s the son of an advisor, one of his father’s friends. and he sees how easily she excels, how quick thinking and smart she is, and starts giving her more and more responsibilities. by the time they’re called out, shang considers ping ie mulan to be his right hand man, and possibly his best friend.

he’s also a little bit in love with ping, and he’s long known he’s attracted to both genders, so he watches ping laugh and smile and the crease between his eyes when he frowns and does his best to let his feelings chase away the best soldier he has. every time shang looks at ping his heart clenches and he things to himself: i wish i could have you, i wish this was a time and a place where one man could have another, i wish you were a girl, is wish i was a girl - i wish we could be together. he’s literally a step away from doodling ‘li ping’ with little hearts over his battle plans. 

so the battles happen. shang and ping lead their men together, respected and loved. they each get promoted, and promoted, and promoted. it’s been years, and it comes to a point where they’re both generals in their own right. they trust each other, care for each other. and are both secretly in love with the other.

mulan is so conflicted. because she wants this war to end and to go home and settle back into life and become ping’s wife, so she can have an easy life spent studying and learning with her family taken care of. that’s what she’d wanted. but now what she wants is shang, her best friend, her brother in arms, her fellow general. she wishes to be everything to him, aches to be the woman on his arm and in his bed, but knows it’s the one thing she can never be.

then that final battle happens. mulan’s quick thinking saves them all and ends the war - but she’s injured.

shang finds out the ping has been a girl all along. he demands explanations - so she tells him everything, that she traded places with ping to save him, to become his wife.

and the lies should sting the sharpest, but they don’t. she’s still the same person, after all. it’s that she’s promised to another man, for one second he’d thought he might have her, but no. so he agrees not to reveal her but he’s furious and furious at himself for being furious and they’re not the same now, broken and splintered and neither of them know what to do.

the war is over. they leave. mulan returns home, and thanks to her ping is now known as a respected general. she’s done her part and survived, and now she gets her reward - ping’s hand in marriage.

but she sees ping for the first time and flings herself into his arms and starts crying. she tells him everything, because he’s still her friend, her very best friend besides shang, the man whom she lied to and betrayed and loves. and ping listens and takes her by the shoulders and says - i’ll uphold our bargain, if that’s what you want. you can be my pampered wife, you’ve more than earned it. but if you want to go to shang, i won’t blame you. you deserve your happiness.

and mulan goes back and forth, but ultimately she decides she has to try. if shang rejects her she’ll return and marry ping and uphold her family honor. but if shang wants her - he’s not as high up as ping, but he’s high up enough to satisfy her family, and also she would love him and want him if he was no more than a farming peasant so it doesn’t matter much anyway.

she rides to the capitol. she finally meets ping’s father, running into him while looking for shang. “ah mulan,” says this man who was never supposed to know of her until she became his daughter-in-law, “i didn’t expect to see you here. how fortuitous. walk with me.” she does, wary, and that’s how she discovers - he and the emperor had discovered her deception a year in, but at that point she’d already proven herself too skilled and valuable to lose. he tells her that he will uphold his son and wife’s deal and gladly welcome her to his household - but that she’s earned her rank as general, and that he and the emperor have no problem with letting her keep it.

she says thank you, shocked and joyful, but that she has to talk to someone first. “ah, yes, young general li,” he says, eyes twinkling, “i do believe he’s around here somewhere.”

she has no idea how he seems to know everything, but she finally tracks down shang who’s ecstatic to see her and hates himself for it. she confesses - says she loves him, that she’s engaged to ping but willing and able to break this engagement for shang. who is dumbfounded and elated and says yes, of course, finally and forever.

and mulan accepts her rank and marries shang, and they become the literal power battle couple of the general li mulan and general li shang. ping becomes a scholar and marries a very nice young woman who loves reading and is happy to read aloud to her husband with his failing eyes.

and they all live happily ever after.

9

Goryeo’s Best Dressed: Hae Soo as the King’s Woman

Straight White Boy Problem #952

Bro: on a scale of 1 to 10, how hot do you think katie is?

me: she’s a 6 but her personality is a 10

Bro: you can’t keep saying all these girls have 10s for personalities

Me: dude…of course i can! Katie, Megan and Rachel are all fun to hang out with bc they have great personalities!

Bro: so what am i? am I a 10?

Me: uhhh…..thats weird im not going to say anything

Bro: well I think you are a 10 because i love hanging out with you dude

Me: bro…..

  • Mycroft: The Americans are keeping codeword-level intel from us. Our analysts are out of their depth.
  • Sherlock: Boring.
  • Mycroft: You know Eurus can't help us anymore. Five minutes on Twitter, that's all I'm asking.
  • Sherlock: Hashtag Go Away.
  • Mycroft: Sherlock. Please.
  • Sherlock: Ah. Desperate, are you? Your people handle my dry cleaning for six months.
  • Mycroft: Fine.
  • Sherlock: Fine. Show me.
  • Mycroft: Just this. What do you make of it? "covfefe"...?

` ° * ✧ ° RANDOM SENTENCE STARTERS PT 2.

❛ I wish that I could tell you. ❜
❛ You should have stayed. ❜
❛ Please don’t come looking for me. ❜
❛ Just get out of here. ❜
❛ I don’t know, I just don’t know. ❜
❛ Why did you come? ❜
❛ Do you think this is a game? ❜
❛ Can’t break something that was already broke. ❜
❛ Don’t fix something that isn’t broke. ❜
❛ Why can’t you just butt out?
❛ I don’t need your help. ❜
❛ I’m not here for you. ❜
❛ You’re never here for me when I need you. ❜
❛ Is that smell you? ❜
❛ Can you please just stop already. ❜
❛ I’m leaving you. ❜
❛ I just didn’t want you to come around. ❜
❛ Are you sure you’re okay alone? ❜
❛ No, no, no, no —- I just checked it last night. ❜
❛ Don’t worry, you’ll learn how to do it someday. ❜
❛ I think we are going to like each other a lot. ❜
❛ I just wanted to come and let you know. ❜
❛ So, what are you going to do, now that you know? ❜
❛ You have got to be fucking kidding me right now. ❜
❛ Do me a favor and shut up already. ❜
❛ Scratch the serial number off of it. ❜
❛ I’m not wearing a mask. ❜
❛ You act like it’s all my fault sometimes. ❜
❛ I’m here for your pity party. ❜
❛ You are in a lot of trouble, you know that right? ❜
❛ You aren’t allowed in here. ❜
❛ Who invited you? ❜
❛ You aren’t wanted around here anymore. Sorry. ❜
❛ I can’t keep covering for you. What’s going on? ❜
❛ Just tell me what’s wrong! Talk to me! ❜
❛ There’s so many things I would’ve done differently. ❜
❛ Stop crying about it and do something about it. ❜
❛ Stop looking for the things worth dying over and find the things worth living for. ❜
❛ So, prove them wrong. Thats the best way to do it. ❜
❛ Don’t need anyone who doesn’t need me. ❜
❛ Yeah, well, we all have our sob story so just save it. ❜
❛ Don’t cry over me or for me, I’m not worth it. ❜
❛ It isn’t cheating if you aren’t actually dating. ❜
❛ You know what? That’s a good idea. ❜
❛ You need to find someome better already. ❜
❛ I’m not listening to your bullshit right now. ❜
❛ Is that a freaking condom? ❜
❛ It smells like sour milk in here for crying out loud. ❜
❛ Am I really standing here witnessing this right now? ❜
❛ I’m not a bad influence if it’s always your ideas. ❜
❛ I never forced you to do anything. ❜
❛ Are you really walking out on me? ❜
❛ Come near me again and I’ll blow your head off. ❜
❛ Treat me like the princess that I am. ❜
❛ Just remember a lot of guys want what I’m letting you do right now. ❜
❛ How can you possibly be in love with two people at the same time? ❜
❛ Let’s just get out of here. ❜
❛ Shhh, I’m going to key his/her car. ❜
❛ There’s no one even here. ❜
❛ I’m just saying, it sounds like a bad idea. ❜
❛ Is that blood on your shirt? ❜
❛ Oh my God, are you bleeding?! ❜
❛ Jesus, don’t you ever get tired of doing that. ❜
❛ You know they throw people in Asylum’s for doing that. ❜
❛ You’re just looking for trouble, like always. ❜
❛ Enough is never enough for you. ❜
❛ I could never get tired of this. ❜
❛ You’re so jumpy lately. ❜
❛ I mean I feel bad but whatever. ❜
❛ I have a reputation to maintain unlike you. ❜
❛ Why are you staring at me? ❜
❛ Stop feeding into his/her bullshit! Wake up! ❜
❛ Are you on drugs or something? ❜
❛ You have lost your fucking mind, once and for all. ❜
❛ Yes, you summoned me. ❜
❛ I’m not here to help you. I’m here to watch you struggle. ❜
❛ Hey, cut it out already! I can hear the stupid TV. ❜
❛ Are you seriously asking me this right now? ❜
❛ Have you ever tried to count the stars? ❜
❛ I should kill you right now! ❜
❛ Don’t you dare walk away from me! ❜
❛ I know where you live! Don’t forget! ❜
❛ I just wanted to have a good time but no, you couldn’t let me, could you? ❜
❛ This friendship has officially sunk, hope you’re happy. ❜
❛ Are you satisfied now? You should be. This is what you wanted. ❜
❛ I don’t get everything that I want unlike you. ❜
❛ Must be nice to be that miserable all the time. ❜
❛ Happiness is the most temporary thing in life. ❜
❛ Everything happens for a reason, right? ❜
❛ You can call me at any hour. Always. ❜
❛ There’s nothing that I can’t do. ❜
❛ You’re like a forty year old, like an old soul or something. ❜
❛ Say it or I’ll cut your finger off. ❜
❛ I will stab you right in the eye if you look at me one more time. ❜
❛ Go ahead and look but don’t touch, unless you want a broken limb. ❜
❛ I’m actually a serial killer. I’m not joking. ❜
❛ You have such a morbid sense of humor. ❜
❛ This is our time, come on, let’s have our time. ❜
❛ Hey, want a hand with that? ❜
❛ I almost forgot what that felt like. ❜
❛ I just want to feel something. I don’t know what though. ❜
❛ I need your help with something. ❜
❛ I’m pissed off right now. ❜
❛ Don’t go breaking my heart. ❜
❛ Why do you build me and watch me fall? Is that fun for you? ❜
❛ Well, I’m used to it by now, so take your best shot. ❜
❛ I hate crying. It makes me mad. ❜
❛ I really don’t want to be seen with you right now. ❜
❛ Please, just don’t forget. Whatever you do. Don’t forget. ❜
❛ You can’t catch me though. ❜
❛ I know I said fucked up things and I’m sorry. ❜
❛ Look, I’m an asshole. I don’t mean be to be. ❜
❛ I’ll try not to be an asshole anymore. ❜
❛ Any pocket knives or anything? ❜
❛ Where’d you go? ❜
❛ I’m going to turn myself in. ❜
❛ Did you finish your cigarette yet? ❜
❛ You can turn around and face the other way. ❜
❛ It wasn’t worth it, was it? ❜
❛ I have no idea what you said. ❜
❛ Right now, you’re acting very weird. ❜
❛ I don’t even know what that statement means. ❜
more voltron as things my family has said
  • pidge: i wrote a list of stuff i needed from the store but i ended up spending two hours wearing a batman cowl, smelling candles and trying to hack everything in the electronics section
  • lance:
  • everytime i look in the mirror, im more and more convinced id fuck my clone
  • keith:
  • you wouldnt have to pay me to dropkick someone. my pleasure to do so would be payment enough. im coming for you grandma
  • hunk:
  • anyways, i was so excited to get the pizza that i threw my hands in the air and hit the guy passing behind me in the face.
  • allura:
  • if youll excuse me, im going to go to my room and belt the lyrics to every sad song ive ever heard in my entire life. if i become too loud at any point, keep it to yourself
  • shiro:
  • why didnt you guys tell me i looked like the worlds saddest hobo. i wouldve told you.
  • coran:
  • ive done a lot of crazy things in my past but ill never forget my brief run in with the law... it involved a flock of geese and the timeless instrument, the recorder. That's all i can say.
  • lotor:
  • youre not truly living until you pull a knife on your own father. its too bad someone stopped me

anonymous asked:

Lance,,,being insecure,,,,and the team helping,,,in subtle ways,,,in my,,,aesthetic,,,

anon,,,you get me,,,,

  • lance has no confidence in himself, thats a fact
  • but he hides it pretty well, all the jokes and bravado keep people off his tail
  • and the trick behind all that is that lance is observant.
    • like scarily so
  • so imagine when missions start to go wrong and lance does something behind everyones back that gets them back on track
  • or when they’re having team meetings, he wil mention something thats really off hand that no one really thinks about till later because omg it makes so much sense. and im talking wayyy later, to the point wehre its not relevant anymore
  • but its doesnt stop there
  • sometimes pidge will be sleeping in an odd place and lance will bring her a blanket so she doesnt get cold
    • he also saves the stuff on her laptop and turns it off or idles it for later
  • hunk will misplace something in the kitchen and lance sometimes walks in and ‘magically’ finds it for him
    • lance just knows where everything is
  • when coran is doing maintenance on the castle, lance likes to appear and give him a helping hand
  • shiro has a hard time sleeping and lance found a soothing body wash for shiro specifically that helps him calm down some, enough to sleep more than he does
    • (you cant tell me that lance doesnt know where all the cosmetic stuff is in the castle, the boy has a nose for it i swear)
  • keith is the training room gremlin and when kes been at it too much, lance will come in and basically screw up keiths groove enough to get him out of there
    • usually takes 3 or 4 challenges before keith has had enough and storms out
    • lance’s feelings arent hurt by it, he just wants keith to take care of himself ok?
  • allura can work herself to the bone too so when shes in the control room, lance likes to come by and start talking about earth
    • the similarities draw allura out of her head and start to open up to lance about altea
    • and by the end of the convo, allura is yawning and lance tells her to go to bed. works like a charm
  • and i like to think it takes a really long time for anyone to realize that lance has been keeping them together this whole time
  • like when conversations get to heated, he will make a joke at his expense and it diffuses the situation
  • or he will say just the right thing to kickstart a really great plan
    • all the while not taking any credit for it
  • like my dudes, lance cares so fucking much and no one notices, but hes completely okay with it since the team is all together and he can see his own family in them
  • he doesnt want to lose that
  • so he sticks to being the Middle Child™ and accepts being looked over as long as team voltron is together

Ever Since
Author: letsjustsee
Word Count: 10.5k
Summary
Louis once again went to leave, but before he could reach the door he heard Barkley jumping off the bed behind him. The giant dog accosted Louis before he could get through, nudging Louis’ legs with all his weight and making him stumble, and Louis had to grab the doorframe to steady himself.
“What the heck, Barkley?” Louis was mostly talking to himself, aware that Barkley couldn’t actually understand him, but he had never witnessed the dog acting so oddly.
He turned around when he heard a quiet murmur coming from the bed.
“What?” He hadn’t been able to make out what Harry said, but at Louis’ question he sat up in bed, hair already wild from the pillow, eyes heavy, and Louis’ stomach gave a little flip.
“He wants you to stay.”
 

Or, a very fluffy AU where Louis finds a lost dog that he wishes he could keep - until he meets his owner, who he wishes he could keep more

  • Sandor: Fuck Brienne of Tarth.
  • Tormund: I'M TRYING TO!
  • Jaime: DUDE, WHAT DO YOU THINK I HAVE WANTED TO DO FOR YEARS?
  • Tormund: .....
  • Jaime: ......
  • Tormund: .....
  • Jaime: .....
  • Tormund: She give you that look too?
  • Jaime: The one where it's like she's staring into your soul and finding you lacking and all you want to do is prove you're good enough and honorable enough for her?
  • Tormund: I was going to say the thing about how she looked like she was going to kick your ass and eat your liver for lunch, but that sounds like it'd make her like me more.
  • Jaime: Yeah, I know that look too.
  • Tormund: Tell me about all of her looks!
  • Jaime: *whips out a presentation about Brienne of Tarth, her looks, and why she's the best*
  • Sandor: *raises eyebrows*
  • Tormund: That's a lot.
  • Jaime: *shrugs* We were forced to go on a road trip together. I lost my hand, called her wench, and saved her from a bear. She kept me safe and made sure I got home okay. I gave her my sword and told her to keep it (just like my heart).
  • Tormund: You lucky bastard. How long have you known her?
  • Jaime: Long enough to know I should have followed her the first time I let her go.
  • Tormund: My sympathies. I know what that's like. If it makes you feel any better, I still haven't sparred with her.
  • Sandor: Don't.
  • Jaime: You'll lose.
  • Sandor: She bit my ear off.
  • Tormund: TELL ME HOW TO WOO THIS WOMAN!
2

Dear future daughter,


I wanted to write this as a sort of time capsule, so that you would know how your mother was at sixteen and what I expect of you as my daughter.

I love music and singing, and I expect I’ll put you for music classes early on, unless you don’t like singing and composing which is completely okay.
You can quit and join karate or anything you want.
I won’t force you, instead I’ll let you find your own path in life, like my mom let me.

You wanna ride horses? Cool. I liked that too.
You wanna go for kickboxing and learn how to defend yourself? Cool.
You wanna do ballet and enthrall the audience with your magnificent coordination? Amazing.

Anything you want to do babe, I am hundred percent right behind you.

I am big on reading as well, and this may sound odd, but unlike dancing or singing, I would very much adore it if you loved reading as much as me.
I will introduce it gently of course, by telling you adventure stories I wrote for you, about bears and fairies, and any thing you like.
Then I would introduce all sorts of new books, the same ones my mom introduced to me,Malory Towers, St. Claires, Tin-Tin’s, Secret Seven and so on.
If you don’t like reading, I understand.
I hope you do, though.

I am really sorry but you may or may not have my acne.
I am so sorry, I know how much you suffer trying to talk to that cute boy who’s the next Zac Efron, or how hard you try to cover it up.
Or how much you cry over something that someone said about your skin.
I wish I could change things in that department but I can’t. You have combination skin just like me, and it only gets better everyday, and soon enough a beautiful sense of maturity and compassion will bloom, like those Violets you adore.

You might deal with a lot of appearance issues, and trust me, even all the way back in 2017, we still have them.
Let me tell you this, your weight is just the relationship you have with gravity.
It doesn’t define your intellect, beauty, the amount of love you can give to the universe around you.
W=m x g
That’s all weight is.
So eat that pizza, gobble that pancake and never starve yourself.
I am not saying don’t be healthy and exercise, oh no, but its okay to be kind to yourself once in a while.

Career.
Tricky.
I am not going to say I am not going to behind your grades, or behind you to keep them up, but I will give you a chance to improve if you mess up, which you will and thats okay.
That’s life.
To me, do what you love.
Do something that keeps you happy, something that keeps you interested.
Do something that makes you excited to walk into work.
I hope I am doing the same honestly.
To me, education is not just about books and grades, and the colleges you get into.
I’ve probably taken you to so many places in the world, and all that you’ve learned, all the food you’ve eaten, all the cultures you’ve experienced, that is what you have truly experienced. Of course, it won’t pay your bills and it sure as hell won’t help you get to college, but it will make you better citizens of this earth, better human beings, more accepting, less judgmental.

Love.
Oh my, honey, you are going to fall so hard.
For a broken boy with broken promises.
With the talented singer.
With the most popular boy in school.
With someone half way across the world.

In the end, after everyone, you will realize you don’t need to settle for someone who makes you feel terrible about yourself, you just need someone who treats you like the princess you are.
Trust me, its not the prettiest or the most popular that gets to be the keeper of your precious heart.

Of course, if you decide you don’t want to be in a relationship, that’s great.
You’re a strong independent woman who doesn’t need anyone to tell her how downright amazing she is.
(feminist alert! haha)

Trust me.
They are going to break you, shatter you, make you feel like you can never love again.
You will love again though.
Again and again.

(You can change the genders above to suit you)
I expect by the time you are old enough to realize who you love, who you’re attracted to, it won’t matter.
I hope for Goodness sakes, we live in progressive times.
If we don’t, I will love you no matter what, if you’re bi, demi, gender fluid or anyone.
I will love you the same.
Coming out will be the easiest thing you will ever have to do, I promise.

Religion
Well, I am an agnostic, but if you decide that you want to follow a religion I will allow it.
Preferably Hinduism because that would make my mom and dad, (your grandma and grandpa happy) but if its Buddhism, Christianity or any religion, be my guest.
Explore, decide and tell me.
I will respect you if you decide to believe in a higher power, because I think that takes a certain amount of strength.

I might get mad at you, scream, cry and you have to realize I am not perfect.
Far from it.
I just want you to be a nice, respectful and loving human being.
Your grades and talents are secondary to me.
Sure I might not buy everything you want me to, but I promise I will provide you with everything you need.

I need to leave now, but it’s been great getting to know you,
this is sixteen year old me signing out.

Lysandra and Falkan

We aren’t talking enough about these two. And we need to because I don’t know about you but this part:

This part absolutely destroyed me. I was crying for at least ten minutes and had to reread it several times and then had to message someone who had already read the book to make sure he wasn’t going to die or I wouldn’t be able to keep reading. More than anything else in this entire book, I could not handle this moment, for many reasons. 

First of all, I knew from the moment Falkan entered that he was important and would probably be related to Lysandra in some way because she is the only other shapeshifter we know of and thats how books work. Him confirming it though just made me so excited.

Second of all, because of all of this confession, we know that Lysandra has a family. After being abandoned by her father (who we know now definitely knew that she was born) and disowned by her mother and being forced into a brothel, this is so meaningful. And not only does she have a family, but he loves her and wants her and has been searching for her for years.

And Falkan’s line, which he was planning to be the last thing he ever said – and you know he must have been thinking this for years now – “I may have failed her in this life. But not in my death.” That is so freaking powerful and amazing and sacrificial and it truly shatters my heart that he was going to give up the years he’s been searching but he needed to make sure someone found her and gave her what he’s been saving up all these years for them – for them to use together to have a life. And as these words are spoken, as this task is handed off, Falkan knows that he will never meet her, never know her name, never be with his niece who is all he has left.

And then he survives, and Nesryn tells him about Lysandra and:

This part also definitely ended me because he is so happy and relieved and overjoyed to hear that yes, his niece is alive. And he decides to join their cause and come back to the Northern Continent and I cannot wait for their reunion in TOG7, I really don’t think I’ll survive it. 

Side note: Falkan’s last name is Ennar so that means it’s Lysandra Ennar (as long as Lys decides to take her father’s last name which I bet she will) and that makes me really happy because we finally have a last name, yay. 

TL;DR We need to talk about Falkan and Lysandra Ennar more because they are precious and their relationship is going to kill me.

Me, Doing College Theatre: “Why do we keep doing all these Weird as Shit™ shows? Wouldn’t we get more butts in seats if we did musicals?”

Me, now, doing Butts-in-Seats-Musicals: “Hokay, please direct me towards the Weird Shit. I would like one Weird Shit Play, please.”