this has been today's last selfie

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Time flies and just last week I reached my first full year on HRT. Following tumblr tradition, here is a little collection of pictures dating pre-HRT up until today.

Much have changed during the last 12 months and I dare say I look a slightly bit different than I did back then.

This will be the last monthly(ish) comparison post I’ll make in regards to HRT. Thank you to the people who have followed me mostly through it!. I started my blog in February, so most of the changes has happened during the time I’ve been here on tumblr. :)

dailymail.co.uk
Louis Tomlinson pays tribute to mum a year after death
The 25-year-old popstar shared the touching post in honour of his late mum Johannah a year after she passed away from leukemia at the age of 43. Louis simply tweeted 'love you always'.

I haven’t seen this on my dash at all today, but maybe I missed it?

Only posting because for the second time in less than a month the Daily Mail have printed a positive headline about Louis, with no snide second meaning and no relegating him to second billing to someone else.

Also the text (below the cut so you don’t have to give the DM clicks) is positive and only mentions Louis, Jay and Lottie.

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My tumblr has never been a place for personal fitness or weight loss. I have mentioned it, but it’s really just about my body acceptance journey through the years. And I’d like it to stay that way.

But I put together these two photos, the left from April of last year and the right from today. What strikes me isn’t necessarily my weight loss, but my confidence. In the left I look uncomfortable and shy. I have the phone tilted to create a more flattering angle and I remember covering my arms with my hair to hide them. In the current photo, I’m just there. Not hiding.

I love both women, but I definitely like the right one much more ❤️

Even’s episode last season had been building up from Ep 7 onwards all the way up to Ep 8.

If we’re doing things by halves, Even has been anxiously on edge holding onto baited breath regarding Mikael since last week, and the selfie today parallels too too too much with the Ep 8 one from last season. Some form of a build up is happening slowly from Ep 3, to where we are now, Ep 4.

It’s 1st May, Mental Health Month, and Even gave us our first update of the new month. Nothing to do with Sana. But everything to do with him. Sana’s liked that photo.

This is Sana’s season, we know Sana and Even know each other. If Even does have an episode, we’d see it from Sana’s POV. So it has to be at a place where Even and Sana are both present.

IDK when that karaoke night thing will happen, but I feel like it could be very soon, maybe this week or next … and if it is this week, on Friday … Sana and Even would both be present there.

And if it was to happen, if Even was to have an episode, I feel Sana would do her utmost best to try and help Even in any way she could, by saying or doing something, or even … by praying something, if it could help Even in some way.

And that would … fire a thousand more questions into Isak’s mind.

Brace yourself.

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Something I’ve realized recently, especially after what happened in Vegas, is that life moves on. So many people lost loved ones, and they had to wake up today, they have to wake up tomorrow. If they can do that I can do the same. I can keep moving forward despite the shitshow that has been the last month. Im allowed to keep thriving, I don’t have to hide myself while I live my life. Life is still so complicated and confusing, but I’m grasping to the positive things I have. My people, my pets, my joy. So here I am, life is hard but fuck…. it can be beautiful. And I’m committed to living it to the fullest.

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Today is a rest day which is always tough and my mental space has been p bad this week despite being SO good last week. Anyway- spent some time drinking coffee and hot tubbing in the cold air this morning with my mama and took some selfies to try to put my body image in perspective (ya do what ya gotta do). Feeling a little better. Determined to make today good and STOKED for the symbolic fresh start coming our way tomorrow 😎

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Chapter 2.5

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ConnecticutCardinals @NHLCardinals

Meet @ConnorWaldo at Smoothie Star in South Springs between 3-4 PM today. Show up in #Cardinals gear for a chance to win pre-season tickets!

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replying to ConnecticutCardinals @NHLCardinals

And, yes, @ConnorWaldo will also take selfies with you even if you don’t show up in Cardinals red. He’s nice like that.

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Selfie-licious time!!!

I have been tagged by these amazing lovelies for a SDS between today and two weeks ago… @fitness-my-way, @plussizeadventure, @dragonfli17, @fatgirlgetsfitatlast, @frontalbread, @evolutionofacosfitter, @sunshinedaisies–buttermellow, @the-fit-geek, @quadsasaurus-rex, and @timboallthetime Just trying to catch up at last!!!

I am just in the swing of things at work, as we gear up for the extension side of tax season!! Ahhhh booo! COFFEE WILL BE LIFE!!! Wait it always has been life. Silly me!

Let me see your amazing self @jms-healthful-life, @shapeyoursmile, @coffeeandfitblr, @grandenoirceur, and @xtinedancefit

Stop Drop Selfie
23 March 2017
Feeling the love this morning with two SDS tags! ❤❤ @grandenoirceur and @fatgirlgetsfitatlast here is my sweaty post-workout grinning face.

My friend Karen has been seconded to Sydney & today was her last Thai-X-Fit class with the crew 😢. She & I are the only ranked martial artists in the class (plus our instructor) and are far & away the noisiest ones! Gonna miss my fellow bellows! 😂 I enjoyed a 50-min intense workout class but will have to do my stretching later as last week I stayed to stretch and was late for work 😮. Will have to do my tags later too. Have a great day/night!

Later: okay tags - have fun @insanitytakeover @mikaxmaki @runningmyownrace @h-co3

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Today, I’m not really feelin myself. In fact, I feel massive. My curves, once something I was proud of, have grown in the last year, and I can’t help but feel ashamed when I look at pictures of myself, watching how I’ve inflated, balloon-like, into the shape I currently am.

But I know that the shame I feel is something I’ve learned. I’ve been told that my body is disgusting, that I’m wrong for looking a certain way, that because I’m a twenty-two rather than a two, I’m not worthy.

So today, even though I don’t feel pretty, even though my anxiety has slowly mounted over the last year as I’ve put on weight, I did my make up and I took a selfie. And when I look at that selfie, I don’t see a girl who is gross, or unworthy, or ugly. I see a girl who is trying every day to better herself, and just because she’s fat doesn’t mean she is somehow less than.

I’m fat, and that’s okay. Because I’m not just fat. I’m fat, and pretty, and smart, and kind. And I’d rather be all of those things than just skinny.

I call this my today was my last day of work before moving to start my phd selfie. Also it’s thunder storming and I can’t sleep. Also I took way too many selfies before I was ok with this. This has been a nightly stream of conscience. You’re welcome. Cuddle applications available!

I’m alive I swear….today has been a busy day and it’s not done yet.

I leave in two days to see Hayden in the UK and there is much to be done.

Today I went to Moms with some last minute washing to do, and had a “thanksgiving” lunch with my dad at a bbq restaurant, went to Kohl’s to use some store cash and found a pair of jeans for $7 😍😍😍, stopped at another Kohl’s to pickup an order, and just now got home and settled.

And guess what!!!!

It is now time to pack!!!!!

Hope you all have had a fabulous Saturday!!!

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So yesterday I met a dog today she’s a service dog her name is Casper and her owner was at the craft store I went to, I said “Your dog is beautiful” and the owner and her friend noted that my hair is the same color as Casper’s and let me take a selfie with my dog twin

KING JIYONG SAVES THE DAY!

I can sleep now. I’m so emotional not only did he post OT5 on Seunghyuns 30th Bday. But it also was a post for Seunghyuns Bday as well! He doesn’t need a caption for us to know. I didn’t think he’d post and I was fine with that so no spotlight would turn on Seung. Idk if it’s just me? But I feel it’s finally blowing over(the scandal) it’s been literally 5 months. And that psycho compulsive liar has stfu because netizens don’t care and we don’t care. It’s o happy got it to blow down. Even YG mentioned TOP and showed his photo on Mix9. I cried. I love them so much. Maybe Ji will post a selfie of them two ;)! Jk, OT5 is just as good! I hope maybe SEunghyun will update today but ris fine if he doesn’t, at least he did last month~ Happy Birthday Bro!