this has been sitting in my drafts for a long long time

cinderella: redo

so i was watching cinderella while doing my nails and waiting for them to dry which was clearly a Mistake because now i can’t help but think -

the evil stepmother was always evil, okay. say her abuse of her own daughters was different than that of cinderella’s - but it was still abuse. giving them impossible expectations, telling them they were never good enough, never pretty enough, never smart enough. and then she gets married, and anastasia and drizella are ecstatic because this man seems kind and warm and maybe just maybe he can temper their mother, maybe with him around she won’t be so cruel. so they’re on their very best behavior in the beginning, they do just as their mother taught - they trot out their best upper court manners in an attempt to get their new stepfather to like them. but it just comes off as cold and snooty and they’re trying, they are, they’re just bad at it. and they see how he is with cinderella, the smiling girl their own age, and they are jealous. they don’t mean to be, they try not to be, they know it isn’t becoming of young ladies. but she gets hugs and kisses and affection and they get rulers slapped on their hands when they reach for desert and sharp jabs to their sides when they slouch and - soon they hate cinderella, not for anything she’s done, but for what she has and they dont

but then her father dies. and it’s all a tumble of things and cinderella is crying and they’ve lost their only chance at escaping their mother’s clutches and it’s terrible. and everything settles and there’s no reason to be jealous anymore but resentment is hard to let go of and they don’t know what to do. they’re only kids too after all. and they’re so terribly bad at comforting people, they can do flowery words and know all the right bows but cinderella is so sad and they just don’t know what to do with that, because they’re supposed to be sisters but they’re not even friends

and slowly but surely their mother starts abusing cinderella, starts making her a maid in her own home, and she’s their mother, what are anastasia and drizella supposed to do? she rules them with an iron fist, and cinderella doesn’t even like them anyway, it’s none of their business.

except one night anastasia crawls into her sister’s bed in the middle of the night and wakes her up. “i was thirsty,” she explains, eyes wide and shiny, and they’re bad at this with other people but drizella has no problems with pulling anastasia into her arms. the younger girl clutches her sister and continues, “i was thirsty and i went down to the kitchen to get some water and - and cinderella is still up! she’s doing the dishes, and she should be asleep, mom is going to make her make breakfast in the morning and -” she cuts herself off with a hiccup and whispers, “it’s not fair.”

“life isn’t fair,” drizella says, echoing one of their mother’s favorite phrases. but her sister is staring at her with wet eyes, and it’s not like their mother is likely to get up before sunrise anyway, she hates waking up, so she pulls herself and anastasia out of bed and off they go.

Keep reading

[Image Description: A screenshot of part of a comment that reads, “someone says ‘I’m not bisexual, I’m pansexual’ it makes me goddamn crazy because bisexuality as a term isn’t limiting. If you’re attracted to men and women and androgynes, you’re still goddamn bisexual, you are just ALSO this other thing. I think a lot of people want to feel special and unique, which I understand, but I think that can come at the cost of actual progress for us.”]

I wish I could remember the link for this, but all I remember is that it was a comment left on an article about bisexual rep, more specifically a character from game of thrones, by the author of the article. but regardless, it’s trash. complete and utter anti-pan trash.

- first we have, “someone says 'I’m not bisexual, I’m pansexual’ it makes me goddamn crazy because bisexuality as a term isn’t limiting.”

let’s just fix that real quick, what I think they meant is, "someone using a label that they actually feel comfortable with and represented by makes me use ableist slurs because I like to police how people define and label their sexuality.“

okay, listen. it doesn’t matter if bisexuality isn’t limiting, if it can mean two genders or all genders. hell, it doesn’t matter if bisexuality and pansexuality had the exact same, word for word, text book definition. people have the right to define and label their sexuality as they please, and you don’t get to police or even have a fucking opinion on it. it’s simply not your place.

if you’re really bothered or confused by someone identifying as pansexual, politely ask them if they’ll share why they identify that way, or just read posts by pansexual people who have discussed this topic to death. either way, shut up and listen, instead of spewing bigoted assumptions.

- to follow that up, we’ve got, "you’re [pansexuals] still goddamn bisexual, you’re just ALSO this other thing.”

this one really pisses me off. stop telling pansexual people that they’re bisexual. whether you’re saying they’re just bisexual or also bisexual. start fucking respecting their label and why/how they identify with it.

stop forcing bisexual as an umbrella term to mean multisexual, because it isn’t one, multisexual is. and let’s not forget that plenty of pansexual people have repeatedly expressed that they are not okay with being called bisexual. (and that’s not because we think there’s anything wrong with being bisexual. it’s just not our label, it’s not how we identify, and again, you need to respect that.)

for the fucking record, my pansexuality isn’t some afterthought or minor detail of my identity. it is my identity, on its own, not as a subset or runner up to anything else. and just so you know, if you spew hate about pansexuality/pan people, but “just also” happen to be bisexual, you're still fucking trash. being bi doesn’t excuse you from being a bigot, or being called out on it.

- next up is, “I think a lot of people want to feel special and unique”.

is that the “polite” way of calling pansexuals “special snowflakes”? well, let me tell you, I don’t identify as pansexual because it makes me feel cool or unique or special. I identify as pansexual because, shocker!! I actually relate to it, in a way that I don’t with any other label. (aside from queer.)

I have never felt connected to the word bisexual. it was close, in that way where before I identified my sexuality, I fiercely supported bisexuality, because I felt a sort of kinship with bisexual people. but I never felt the word described me.

when I learned about pansexuality, though. it just immediately clicked and felt right. so, honestly? who the fuck do you think you are, to try to erase or diminish that by saying I call myself pansexual just to feel special? like it’s a fucking fact? like you fucking know me and my feelings? kindly go fuck yourself.

- and lastly, “I think that can come at the cost of actual progress for us.”

okay, identifying explicitly as pansexual is not, in any way whatsoever, hurting bisexual people or the bisexual movement. and I’m really interested in who you’re referring to with that “us”, because while you seem to believe that pansexuality and bisexuality are the same, you don’t seem to hold any kind of respect for pansexual people, and that leads me to believe that progress for you and progress for me mean different things.

progress for me is celebrities publicly identifying as pansexual and discussing their pansexuality, characters being canonically pansexual, people fighting for pansexual rep, people bringing awareness to pansexuality, people acknowledging that unlabeled multisexual characters could be pansexual, pansexual people not being forced under an “umbrella term” that they didn’t ask for and get lost under, pansexual people finally getting their seat at the table.

if that isn’t progress to you, if you think any of that is somehow hurting bisexuality, then there definitely is no “us”. I just really cannot imagine being so ignorantly self-centered that you truly believe that the visibility and support of a sexuality that isn’t yours is detrimental to that of yours.

pansexual and bisexual people and support/acceptance/visibility CAN coexist, and the only people hurting progress are those like you, who act like it’s one or the other.

all in all, anti-pan bisexual people make no sense and are actual human garbage and they really need to reign in their bigoted shit because I feel like people are gonna start accusing me of hating bi people for always calling bisexual people's anti-pan shit, and that is something I am not here for, seriously lmfao don’t even try me

anonymous asked:

How about a semi angsty fight with the rfa+V but they make up because HAPPY ENDINGS ARE NICE

I’m a slut for angst don’t give me this power 

Yoosung: 

✮ you had accidentally knocked the power cord to his computer while you were cleaning and he was playing LOLOL 
✮ he screamed 
✮ he was ranting and raving about how he was in the middle of an important raid and he was so close to levelling up 
✮ and you’re kinda standing there with a laundry basket and a pile of clothes almost over your head 
✮ and you don’t know what to do 
✮ you kind of want to cry 
✮ you kind of want to throw the laundry at his head 
✮ until 
✮ “rika never did things like this!!”
✮ oh 
✮ of course
✮ it somehow always got back to this point. comparing you with rika 
✮ sometimes he didn’t mean it or even realise he’d done it. but this was different 
✮ you remain eerily calm, putting the laundry down before turning to glare at yoosung 
✮ a wave of realisation hits him and he’s just full of guilt 
✮ you very calmly tell him you’re going to spend the night with jaehee, and ask him not to contact you 
✮ he begins crying and pleading with you to stop and stay 
✮ he’s so sorry and he’s just hating himself while you pack an overnight bag
✮ he’s practically on his knees and following you, begging you to stay 
✮ you kind of pause when you see the raw sorrow in his face 
✮ you sigh and stop for a moment 
✮ you’re hurt but you know that you have to talk it out with yoosung for it to get better 
✮ you both talk for a few hours, and he completely understands your viewpoint and he apologises 18923475829 times 
✮ he stays off of LOLOL for a few weeks, and even after that he tries not to get too obsessed– because that’s how the whole problem started 
✮ he just doesn’t want to lose you 

Jaehee: 

✎ you just wanted her to stop working so much 
✎ she was working overtime at the cafe 
✎ so much that she practically lived there 
✎ she was there after-hours and before-hours 
✎ sometimes she slept there and wouldn’t come home 
✎ so you book a holiday for her in secret, making plans behind her back for the cafe so it can function without her
✎ you tell all the employees and the deliverers who are close with the shop 
✎ but when you sit jaehee down and announce your plan 
✎ she gets so cold 
✎ she wants none of it 
✎ she’s not overworking herself dammit 
✎ she’s just doing what needs to be done 
✎ you try telling her that she doesn’t need to coddle the cafe, that you and the other emplyees were fully capable of running it 
✎ but she’s so worked up 
✎ and she says that you can’t 
✎ you’re clearly offended and you’re upset that your hard work planning this holiday for her is being pushed aside 
✎ somehow, you get her to take the holiday and see how it pans out 
✎ she’s calling you constantly 
✎ eventually you start ignoring her calls and texts 
✎ she gets so freaked out that the cafe is literally crumbling with you in charge so she rushes home 
✎ and you’re so mad when she rushes into the cafe, only to stop when she sees everything is going as usual 
✎ “b-but you weren’t answering my calls! I thought something happened!” 
✎ “jaehee i was ignoring you because you have no trust in me and I was busy making sure you could enjoy your holiday!” you were screaming 
✎ she felt so bad 
✎ she took her vacation and came back a lot better 
✎ you two made up, and she explained that her problem came from being jumin’s assistant for so long (if she didn’t do her job everything fucked up bc jumin is horrible at his job lmao) 
✎ she was a lot more calm after that and took breaks when she needed to (even took some time off on every second weekend- when you took care of the cafe) 

Zen: 

✿ he was working 
✿ of course 
✿ his job was the root of most of your arguments as a couple 
✿ but this time he had gone out for drinks with the cast 
✿ while you were standing outside of a restaurant waiting for him- you were going to have a date since filming was wrapping up that day (which is why the cast was having drinks in the first place) 
✿ you had faith in him, and stayed there until the restaurant closed 
✿ which was very, very late in the evening, seeing as it was part bar 
✿ as you were walking home, upset 
✿ zen came stumbling out of the bar with his castmates 
✿ he doesn’t notice you at first 
✿ until one of his acting buddies points at you, not recognising you, and laughs about how you’re soaked in rain and look like you’ve had that worst day of your life 
✿ you hear him 
✿ zen chuckles slightly before looking closer and realising who it is 
✿ swears up a storm as he pushes away everyone- muttering out something like ‘ssss my girlfirendddd’ 
✿ he tries to grab you because you’re storming away 
✿ he’s trying to coo and ask you why you were out so late because he’s drunk and doesn’t remember 
✿ you slap his hands away before screaming at him 
✿ “I was waiting for you! Our date for celebrating the end of filming?! Guess you had other plans, huh?!” 
✿ he’s so shocked like 
✿ it looks like he’s been smacked in the face 
✿ he follows you all the way home, apologising profusely 
✿ you make him sleep on the couch and lock yourself in the bedroom 
✿ when he wakes up the next morning he remembers, even through his wicked hangover 
✿ he cooks an amazing breakfast and waits for you to come out 
✿ when you do he hands you flowers with a card about how sorry he is
✿ he swears that he’ll make it up to you- and never let it happen ever again 

Jumin: 

₩ he was planning on properly introducing you to his father 
₩ but he was getting so controlling 
₩ he literally dressed you and did your hair and practically gave you a lecture on how to act and what to say 
₩ you’re kind of pissed at him but try to understand that he’s just stressed about how his father will react 
₩ his father loves you, and you loosen up- begin to be yourself 
₩ his father leaves after blessing your relationship together 
₩ but jumin is fuming 
₩ ‘what were you doing?! I told you not to say this or that’ blah blah 
₩ you’re just so shocked 
₩ “jumin that’s not who I am!” 
₩ “that’s who you should be!” 
₩ silence. 
₩ jumin has never been afraid of anything 
₩ but he’s afraid of this silence and the tears that are slipping down your cheeks 
₩ he’s afraid of what he said. he’s afraid of himself 
₩ he stumbles over his words as he tries to apologise, saying that isn’t what he meant 
₩ you can’t hear him though, all you can hear is his previous words echoing through your head 
₩ you tell him you’re sleeping in the guest room that night- the only thing you said before locking him out 
₩ when you get up the next morning 
₩ you open the door and see jumin sitting on the ground agains the wall next to your door, elizabeth pulled to his chest 
₩ his eyes were puffy and his cheeks and nose red 
₩ he had a note next to him that he hadn’t finished 
₩ it read ‘I’m sorry’ over and over, tear stains smudging some of the letters 
₩ you sigh, and kneel down to wake him up 
₩ he explains that he thought his father wouldn’t accept you unless you were like the other women and he didn’t want his father to come between your relationship anymore than he already had with the Sarah bullshit 
₩ and you make up but he spends so long reassuring you that he loves you so much, just the way you are 

Seven/Saeyoung: 

✞ he was doing it again
✞ he was trying to push you away 
✞ someone had approached you while you were on the street, asking about a ‘707′ 
✞ when you told saeyoung he got so scared and reverted back to his old ways 
✞ trying to push you away so that you ‘wouldn’t get hurt’ 
✞ when you try to kiss his cheek he physically pushes you away (after acting hostile all day) 
✞ and you trip over his wires and fall- hitting your head on the ground 
✞ he’s shocked, you’re shocked 
✞ he reaches forward to try and help you but freezes when you flinch away 
✞ he feels like less than shit 
✞ he feels like death himself. the grim reaper- that’s him. 
✞ he watches helplessly as you stumble to your feet and rush off to the bedroom, locking yourself inside (even though Saeyoung had control over the locks) 
✞ he spends about an hour just leaning over his desk with his head in his hands, thinking over how terrible he had been 
✞ how you deserve so much better 
✞ he was unstable. he was dangerous. 
✞ you were the light. you were everything 
✞ after a while he unlocks the door and sends your robot-cat in with flowers and a note in his mouth 
✞ it’s a handwritten letter from saeyoung, telling you he was just scared 
✞ that he was so sorry. that he loved you more than he could ever understand and he didn’t know how to deal with that yet 
✞ you slowly walk out, seeing him sitting on the ground somewhere, surrounded by the mess that he’d made 
✞ he had thrown all the cushions and pillows on the couch. ripped up the first drafts of the note. he’d even knocked one of his monitors to the ground, shattering it.
✞ you sit with him and talk together 
✞ you make a plan for how you can both deal with these times better 
✞ he promises to spend his life making sure you’re as happy as you can be 

V/Jihyun:

☼ i’m so sorry but i don’t want to hurt this precious roll 

there’s not really a name for the kind of community i’ve found myself relating to the most, but somehow i’m surrounded by these people anyway: girls who struggle with sexuality labels. girls who like boys once in awhile, girls who have maybe even kissed boys or gone out with boys, but are generally kind of wary about boys and find their attraction to them weak and confusing and not really worth pursuing. girls who are overwhelmingly attracted to girls, other people, anyone but boys, sort of; girls who try out “bisexual” and feel just a little bit wrong–maybe wrong enough to discard it or maybe not; girls who would almost but not quite be telling the truth if they turned down boys by saying “sorry, i’m a lesbian.” (“i’m not into boys” is easier and more true but still itches, because what about that crush in seventh grade, what about that friend you’d kiss if he asked.) i don’t know where i’m going with this but i remember the incredible relief when i first saw someone else feeling this way and realized that it was an okay way to be.

The Tiny Anthropologist's Advice for College:
  • 8 AM classes really aren't that bad: It may take some willpower (and coffee) to get there, but really, 8AMs aren't that bad. Get a decent amount of sleep the night before and you will be okay. If I can get myself and my 4 year old out of bed, get ready, drop her off at preschool and arrive on time for an 8am, you can too!
  • Taking classes that meet once a week for long blocks: If your learning style is such that sitting in a long lecture once a week is something you can handle, then these are the best classes to take. Personally, I have done 3 semesters of these and they have been my favorite and the ones I have gotten the best grades in.
  • Scheduling back-to-back class periods: These can be beneficial if you're the type of person that just likes to get everything out of the way at once. However, the downside is that you will not have time to eat between classes, and you may have to grab something and eat during lecture. If the buildings for your classes are far apart, this may not even be an option. Having breaks between classes is important to allow yourself mental relaxation and to eat, or catch up on work.
  • Don't be afraid to change your major: I've changed my major a lot, like maybe 8-10 times. The downside is that I am graduating a year late, but I took A LOT of fascinating classes and became a much better rounded student. Colleges know that student change their minds. If you switch majors 2-3 times, you won't end up behind. I'm a special case.
  • Take long-hand notes: You may feel strange taking long-hand notes while everyone else is typing away at their MacBooks, but long-hand notes are MUCH more beneficial as far as long-term memory goes, and you don't run the risk of being distracted by Facebook.
  • Dress appropriately for class: The college stereotype of everyone attending class in their pajamas isn't true. At least make the effort to throw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Your professors will notice if you look like a slacker in class, and dressing nicely (or at least not in your pajamas) shows them that you value your education and respect their lectures. People wear anything from casual clothes to ties to class, and everything inbetween. Don't be afraid you'll be overdressed, being underdressed is much worse (in my opinion).
  • Cultivate relationships with professors: ATTEND OFFICE HOURS. Close relationships with professors are massively helpful! Professors are much more willing to write letters of recommendation, look over rough drafts, or help you out via email at 10pm for students that they know than ones that they don't. Additionally, professors can be some of the most interesting people you will ever meet.
  • Attend class: Along the same lines as above, attending class is very important. You (or your parents) are paying for you to be there. You should try to get the most out of that by attending lectures that you have signed up for. Additionally, when it comes finals time and you need to boost your grade, no professor is going to help you if you haven't attended their lectures.
  • Invest in a water bottle: Nothing is worse than sitting in a lecture dying of thirst.
  • Invest in a messenger bag, tote bag, or backpack: You don't have a locker in college and chances are your dorm will be far away from your classes. Make sure you have something to carry anything you'll need, from books, to pens and pencils, to a laptop, or even snacks like granola bars.
  • Take notes: Do it. Your professor knows more than you, that's why they are at the front of the room. Listen to them, and write down what they say. Then study it. This is how you learn.
  • Utilize the library: Other than during finals week, the library is pretty much a guaranteed quiet place to study. Additionally, college libraries have databases for research papers, printing services, and a whole lot more for students.
  • Eat alone if you want/have to: No one will judge you. I promise.
  • Annotate your books: Especially if you are an English/literature major! It is a lot easier to simply take all of your notes in the novel than to copy down page numbers and quotes into a notebook. Textbooks (like science ones) can be annotated too!
  • Don't let anyone shame you about your major: Each major is difficult in its own way. Don't let anyone make you feel like you're taking an "easy" major or that they are more intelligent than you because they are in a "hard" major. STEM majors are not better than Liberal Arts majors, and Liberal Arts majors are not better than STEM majors. Ignore anyone who says otherwise. Ignore anyone who says your major is pointless. This does not only apply to fellow students, but family, friends, and the world in general.
  • Prepare for advising periods: Class offerings are usually posted before registration is open. Take an hour to become familiar with the requirements of your department and the individual college it is in (if applicable), as well as University/institutional requirements (IE at UMass, my "college" is the College of Social and Behavioral Sciences, while my department is Anthropology. The university itself, SBS, and Anthro all have different specific requirements I must meet to graduate) and make a list of classes you would like to take that satisfy these requirements. Advisors will appreciate it.
  • Take advantage of campus resources: Many colleges and universities have numerous extremely helpful resources, such as employment services which will help with resumes, or counselors for when you're having a hard time. Use these. They are there for you.
  • Keep yourself organized: Notebooks, highlighters, a planner, flashcards, an expandable file, binders, folders, literally whatever you need to keep track of all your papers, assignments, due dates, and what you need to help you study is important for you to have. If you don't know what helps you study or what keeps you organized, try some different systems or do some research.
  • Keep your syllabi: Every semester I buy a different notebook for each class I am taking, and I always keep my syllabus folded in half in the back of each notebook. It has saved my ass numerous times.
  • Check your email or the course website before class: Nothing sucks more than being the only kid who didn't know class was cancelled, especially if you're a commuter and you drove in/took the bus to a class that isn't happening.
  • Give yourself plenty of time: Whether its getting to class, doing homework, or writing a paper, make sure you give yourself enough time. This is especially important for commuters. I can promise you that you will need more time to drive to class than you think. I live less than 40 minutes away from UMass and I still leave 75-90 minutes before class starts.
  • Understand your learning style: Do flashcards work best? What about mindmaps? Answering questions at the end of the chapter? Understand what allows things to sink into your mind the best, and utilize that method of learning.
  • Honestly, you can get by with SparkNotes: I was an English major. We had to read, a lot and I didn't always read the novels. I used SparkNotes and skimmed chapters. While I wouldn't recommend relying on this entirely to graduate, it can help in a pinch.
  • Skipping class: I know I just told you to go, and I do mean that. But sometimes you need to skip class and be lazy or frivolous, and that's fine. Don't make it a habit. I usually allow myself 1-2 "mental health" days per semester. HOWEVER you should be VERY clear on the absence policy of your professors. Some don't take attendance, and others will kick you out if you miss 3 classes. It's always in the syllabus.
  • It's okay to withdraw from a class: Getting a W is better than getting an F. If a class is too much for you, then it's best to step out of it. Most professors will understand, and most grad schools and jobs will too.
  • Be kind to yourself: It's easy to only value yourself through school, as in what grade you got on a test, or how your GPA stacks up against others but we are all human and sometimes we fuck up and sometimes we do poorly and thats alright. Learn from it and move on.
  • Take care of yourself: !!!!! This is very important. Eat as well as you can/enough, sleep enough, don't become addicted to or dependent on drugs/alcohol, exercise (even if its just walking to class), take showers, etc. Sometimes taking care of yourself takes a back seat to taking care of your grades OR to having too much fun, and neither is a good strategy. Yes, college is a time to assert your independence and have fun and party, but if you do too much it will begin to affect your grades and your health.
  • Try to get internships or research assistantships/independent studies: These will look great on your resume and a lot of them are quite interesting/enjoyable. It shows initiative, drive, and motivation! Professors usually have independent studies and career/employment services (if your campus has that) can help with internship placement.
  • These are basic things that I have learned during my college career. I'm sure I could come up with more, but I hope this is helpful!

//so I was thinking this morning (always a dangerous sign) that I’ve talked a bit recently about how the Tumblr RP community isn’t always very good at encouraging people to find ways to manage or get to their drafts, and is instead more likely to coddle peoples’ anxieties without actually helping them at all. 

So this is a post of a few tips and tricks that might help RPers manage some of the more common anxieties I see crop up in our circle. Now, I’m not a full psychologist and nor am I licensed counselor. But I do have my master’s degree in clinical psychology with the intention to go on for the PhD (or get licensed to practice if I don’t get into a program) so I do kinda know what I’m talking about. Hopefully some of this advice is a little helpful:

1. “My drafts just stress me out.” This is a pretty common complaint, but I think in most circumstances it’s caused by stress going on outside of the RP world. Take a step back and breathe. Handle whatever is going on in your real life. That always comes first. If you come back and your drafts are still causing you to feel panicky, the next step is to find out the more specific reasons why. That’s going to help you best address the anxiety. Read on for some common reasons.

2. “I’ve gotten so behind, there’s so many and I’m overwhelmed.” This happens all the time! You take a hiatus for a week or two, or life just got really busy for a while, or just lost muse and now it’s back. But in the meantime, your drafts have piled up- suddenly you’re looking at 20, 50, 100- how do you even start? 

The best way I’ve found to handle this is to break them up into smaller chunks. It might be helpful to copy and paste your partners’ replies over into one or more word documents. You can then further organize those word documents even more. One for short replies, one for long, one for medium length. Or you can organize by muses, by how long the draft has been in your folder- whichever way you want to handle this. If you want to put one reply per document, you can organize them into folders instead. How you do this is entirely up to you.

Set a small goal for yourself- even one draft a day is better than no drafts at all. But by breaking the work up into chunks, you’ve taken a lot of the pressure off yourself. A goal of 1-5 drafts a day is a lot better than looking at all 50. 

Another tip- use the queue! Or simply keep completed drafts saved in the drafts folder until you’ve caught up enough to start posting. The queue will stagger your posts so replies aren’t coming out all at once, and your partners aren’t able to immediately reply back. And obviously keeping them in drafts even after they’re done lets you have more time to catch up. These are just a couple of tips, however, and there are probably other good ways to manage drafts. Find what works best for you!

And don’t be afraid to drop a couple if you have no muse for those threads anymore. Just let your partner know, they’ll understand. And if they don’t, they’re just an asshole and who needs that, right? It is better to communicate that you’re dropping them, however, so you’re partner isn’t left hanging.

3. “I haven’t replied in weeks, I’m worried my partner hates me.” I guarantee this is not true. Most people in the rp community are very understanding of slow response time. Your partners want to rp with you- they’ll be thrilled to see a response, even if it’s been several weeks. Responding, even slowly, shows a lot more dedication and excitement over your threads. 

So if it’s been several weeks, and you finally have muse for that thread and want to reply to it, but feel guilty or anxious because it’s been so long- reply anyway. Your partner will be so happy to see your response. 

Another way to alleviate this anxiety is to simply talk to your partner. And I know, this can be scary- but sometimes you have to bite the bullet and do the thing that makes you anxious. Take it slow if you need to, but communication is the best way to feel better about it. And I guarantee, you are going to feel so much more proud of yourself if you did the thing that made you anxious than if you didn’t.

That goes for replying as well. 

4. “I feel so inadequate compared to others. I should just stop.” This is an example of what mental health professionals call a “negative automatic thought”, or “NAT”. And like real gnats, these little thoughts get all up in your ears and start buzzing around. They can spiral out of control very quickly, until you feel absolutely terrible about yourself. These thoughts are very common in people with both anxiety and depression. 

But the thing is, they can be changed. You can actually re-wire your brain with a little work so that it won’t think these thoughts quite as often. One of the most effective ways is to simply replace the negative thought with a positive one- even if you don’t believe it. So if your negative thought is “I’m horrible compared to other people,” a replacement thought could be “No, I’m just as good as anyone else,” or “my writing is unique to me and it has value.”

You will not believe yourself at first, and it will seem a little bit weird when you start. It’s also a little challenging- your negative thoughts are automatic, you’re so used to thinking them that you aren’t even fully aware of it it half the time. But when you do catch yourself spiraling off into those negative thoughts- try to stop them. This is something we teach in therapy and over time, it does help. And it does get easier.

5. “It has to be PERFECT.” Perfectionism is at the root of a lot of peoples’ anxieties. But I challenge you with this- why? Why does it have to be perfect? What will happen if it’s not perfect? 

The answer to that, usually, is “my partners will hate me/lose interest/think I’m stupid or a bad writer.” Perfectionism is usually a fear of judgment, and it’s usually fueled by feelings of inadequacy or fears of failure. So to that, I refer you back to the previous advice about negative automatic thoughts. 

Challenge your thinking about your perfectionism. A good replacement thought for this one is “even if it’s not perfect, my partner will still be happy that I responded. My writing is still valuable to them.” Another good one- “imperfection means there’s room to grow. Mistakes don’t mean I’m a failure or no good.” 

In general, don’t let anxiety say “I can’t do this.” You can do it. Anxiety is not a permanent state. The body cannot sustain it very long- the elevated heart rate, heavy breathing, heightened arousal- it’s physically impossible for it to last. Eventually, your body will start to calm itself and even back out. This is something that is very hard to sit with, because your natural instinct is to run away from the thing that’s making you anxious. Your instinct is to close the drafts folder, to close the messenger, to log out of tumblr and ignore it all completely. But the truth is, that only makes your anxiety worse in the long run. 

Now, if these tips don’t help, or you’re finding your anxiety is so bad that it’s affecting your daily life in almost everything- I encourage people to please see a psychologist, psychiatrist, or some other mental health professional. Anxiety that’s chronically preventing you from doing the things you enjoy is anxiety that probably needs treatment. Having the extra support of a therapist or medication often makes it possible to implement some of these strategies, or find better ones that work for you. Especially if you’re having a hard time managing things on your own. 

Anybody that wants to add to this with other ideas that have been helpful to you, please feel free to do so. 

Writing a Novel: Being Unafraid of Failure

Part of the writing process is definitely about having the courage to sit down and write 200+ pages of a novel, but more than that, it’s more recognizably about being unafraid to write something that could potentially be horrible. It’s something that most of us don’t talk about but it’s all somewhere in the back of our minds, “Maybe my book is unreadable.”

Keep reading

Interrupted [2/3]

Pairings: Bucky x Steve || Bucky x Steve x Reader

Summary: You fall asleep during a movie night with the boys. They discover your little secret.

Warnings: Oral sex (f/r and m/r), mildly dom!Steve, sex dreams, mentions of masturbation, threesome

Notes: Yeah, so this was written a long while back and has just been sitting in my drafts folder ever since. Forgive me if the smut is shit. 

[1] [2] [3] || My Masterlist || gif source

Nearly a week has passed since you accidentally walked in on Steve and Bucky doing unspeakable acts in the bedroom. Well, their living room. The tension between the three of you is palpable — more so with you and Steve, than anything else. He avoids you wherever possible, trying his damn hardest not to make eye contact or exchange more than a few terse sentences.

You’re not offended. Steve values his dignity, and beyond that, his privacy; his reaction is what you expected it to be. Though he’s not talking to you, Bucky has assured you that Steve’s not mad, he just needs time to buildup his self-confidence again. The Cap’ll come around, at some point.

Keep reading

meet solangelo: college friends edition
  • imagine: nico and will, living together in an apartment in *insert a city with a college with a great medical programme*
  • nico doesn’t really do school, but he does internet courses on linguistics while will attends med school
  • and one day will is supposed to work on some group project or another, and they go to the library only to discover it closed for maintenance or something, idk it’s not important really
  • the point here is that after talking about their options will sighs a little and goes, “well, i guess we can go to our place, nico is probably home but i don’t think he’ll mind”
  • (secretly he thinks nico is probably asleep anyway, but doesn’t say anything)
  • so they go to the apartment, and see nico playing video games
  • and ofc the other people in the group are curious about the mysterious nico that will barely ever stops talking about
  • like seriously, nico is mentioned in every other sentence
  • “- and i went home and nico had made this awesome chicken pasta sauce that -“
  • “- just like that, even nico said it’s crazy -”
  • “- just last week nico showed me this documentary -”
  • and they think this nico person must be one hell of a roommate if a guy like will is so over the moon with him
  • but nico barely looks up from his game when will calls for him, too focused on his game
  • “have you even moved from that spot since this morning?”
  • “once or twice”
  • “have you eaten?”
  • “yes, mom
  • will and his course friends set up around the kitchen island and get to work, and like a good host will brews them coffee
  • he asks nico if he wants any, and what nico answers is just a bunch of words in a language the other guys don’t understand but sound like curse words
  • will only rolls his eyes, but the others are pretty taken aback, because this is the infamous nico that’s so great???
  • during the maybe half an hour that nico sits on the couch and the others work on their project, nico doesn’t manage to improve the first impression
  • basically he seems rude and grumpy, and he talks to will like he barely stands him, and will just??? sits there??? and occasionally rolls his eyes, like this is a daily occurrence? like what??
  • eventually nico stops his game and wanders to the kitchen, not sparing the rest of the people there a look as he goes straight to the fridge
  • “i thought we still had juice?”
  • “we would have if you had gone to the store today like i asked you”
  • “you asked me to go to the store?”
  • “multiple times, nico”
  • and all this while will doesn’t even look up from his text book, perfectly capable of scanning the pages for information while having a row with his apparently real ass of a roommate
  • (”dude, he really needs to find a new roommate”, one of the guys whispers to the other two, and they both nod, kind of worried about will)
  • nico huffs and looks kinda dangerous when he stomps out of the kitchen and to the hall, and they hear the jingle of keys that signal nico is going somewhere
  • they hope it’s the store and that he stays there until they’ve left
  • “did you forget something, di angelo???”
  • and wow, they’ve never heard will sound like that, like half-annoyed and half-exasperated, with a tinge of something that’s almost amusement but not really? what?
  • and then
  • then
  • they hear a very audible sigh from the hall, and nico walks back to the kitchen, straight to will, and kisses him
  • and not like, a peck on the cheek or even a sarcastic one on the lips
  • a real, slow, open mouthed kiss, with tongue, and he has both his hands on will’s cheeks and it looks so tender 
  • and it seems like the kiss goes on and on and on, even though it barely lasts five seconds
  • but nico leans back slowly, and then there’s a small peck on the lips, and stop the press, is that a smile???
  • “you’re a fucking asshole”, nico says, but it’s not spat out like everything else they’ve heard him say
  • no, this is soft and sweet, almost as if asshole is a pet name, and it occurs to them that maybe they weren’t supposed to be listening in on that?
  • and will, the cool guy that (in their eyes) ten seconds ago was in desperate need of a new, more respectful roommate, smiles at nico like he hung the sun and the stars, and says, just as softly, “i love you too. buy some ice cream?”
  • “you ate the ice cream???”
  • “we can order italian for dinner”
  • and meanwhile will’s course friends sit there with their mouths wide open like, what the hell is going on, who is this guy???
  • because nico seems completely different from the person that they saw just like, barely a minute ago
  • and then nico is gone, just like that, and will turns back to his work like nothing happened, and as the apartment door slams shut the others just look at will with round eyes like explain this 
  • “so like… you’re together?” is what they manage to ask first
  • will looks up from his notes, a little startled, and answers a little “yes?” like he thinks it was obvious
  • and okay, maybe it was obvious, but like
  • “for how long???”
  • and will actually stops to think for a few seconds, before his eyes get this strange glint and he says “seven years this november”
  • the guys look at each other, puzzled
  • like, maybe it would have made more sense to them if they had been together for less than a year, still adjusting to their places in each other’s lives, still learning their way around
  • but seven years???
  • “that’s longer than my dad was together with my mom” one of them blurts out in shock
  • “i was so sure you were going to ask ruby out by thanksgiving” says another
  • “and here i was going to suggest you find a more respectful roommate”
  • let’s just say that they have to reschedule dong the project, because these guys are goddamn noisy and want to know everything they’ve missed about will and nico’s relationship
  • “did you guys meet in high school or something?”
  • “wait, so when veronica asked you out and you turned her down, it wasn’t just because she’s a girl?”
  • “how come he talks to you like that?”
  • the guys are out before nico returns, insisting that they can meet up another time, clearly already gossiping about the new info they have on their friend
  • and will is not stupid, he knows that nico seemed super rude to them, but he also knows that it doesn’t matter as long as the two of them know what’s up
  • and maybe, just maybe, will starts planning a get together where his college friends can meet nico, properly this time