this hair is so bad it needs to go

Matthew Daddario Quotes
  • "We call our shoes ‘sneakers,’ right? But they're not really sneaking."
  • "Can't wait till they invent phones with keyboards."
  • "I don't know this guy. He came to hang out so I complimented his hair."
  • "How many artichokes can you eat in one sitting?"
  • "No, go back to my idea!"
  • "Maybe, they'll throw the books out. Just not follow the books anymore."
  • "Hey guys did everyone floss today? You gotta floss every day. Otherwise, your dentist makes you feel bad."
  • "I play piano but I won't call it a talent."
  • "I'm the funniest person in the cast and that's simply because everybody else is so painfully unfunny."
  • "There is literally no memory left in my phone. I took fourteen thousand blue sky photos and I need all of them."
  • "Send him photos of fried chicken and crab cakes."
  • "I have a dentist appt tomorrow. I'm not gonna brush my teeth tonight. Also not going to shower. This is going to be painful for everyone."
  • "You are not trash, you are lovely!"
  • "Don't sign contracts in your blood. It's usually not required by any reputable party."
  • "He's slippin' out his little tongue eating snail treats off the ground."
  • "I will eat anywhere in the house. I'll eat cheese crackers in bed!"
  • "He looks down and sees this wonderful man. He hops down there and smooches that man right on the face. Right in front of everyone."
  • "'s not fair that he is more handsome than me!!!"
  • "Don't do the hokey pokey around witches."
  • "They're never gonna release the deleted scenes to you guys because they're racy and inappropriate."
  • "This video is going on social media!"
  • "I'm ashamed to admit I lied about the selfies. The phone is 98% cow pictures and I can't delete them. I need a new phone. Forgive me."
  • "Thank god I started sandpapering my feet when I was four."
  • "Is Alec appreciating at an increased rate because of an increase in demand? Or is it the same rate as before."
  • "Note, some alpaca do not appreciate head pats."
  • "If humans lived in barns, we'd be smelly, too."
  • "Had to delete all my cow photos to make room for selfies, so I will say 'I appreciate you, cows.'"
  • "Wow. It's spelled Gollum. Wow. So disappointed. Hiding my own cell phone for the next two weeks."
  • "You're a little kitty cat. Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy kitty cat, kitty cat."
  • "Sometimes when I travel between dimensions, I think, man, I should really buy a sailboat."
  • "If I was running for President, my VP would be a well trained golden retriever."
  • "Who's not going to watch Hamlet in space? I mean, Space Hamlet!"
  • "I just think we should all acknowledge what is awesome about Harry!"
  • "I like eating food after dark."
  • "Generally, people avoid kissing their sister in a healthy life."
  • "If you don't like my zebra leggings, it's because you just don't understand zebra leggings."
  • "I think we should provide more showers for cows."
  • "If I'm having a bad day, I eat pizza."
  • "I hope Google uses the same algorithm to encrypt my email as my pocket does to tie knots with my headphones."
  • "I would own a farm. Not like growing crops but maybe have a few animals like cows, and maybe an alpaca or a llama. I would chop wood all day."
  • "Dog. #dog. Dog. Dog."
  • "Had fun tweeting with/at you guys. Phone is about to die. Gonna go get more double-A batteries."
  • "The jackhammer has been joined by his friend, the concrete saw. Rare that you get two music legends right outside your window like this."
  • "Interdimensional cat smuggling is severely punished. But you can make a killing on the black cat market."
  • "You should just give up on me like I did. So done with me right now I can't even."
  • "What am I fan of? No one's ever asked me this before! Oh man."
  • "I don't know why they say that. I think they're poking fun at me."
  • "Congrats. You deserve that sailboat."
  • "I don't know. I don't have any pet peeve. Yapping little dogs, I guess. Buttons that don't go up right."
  • "Donkeys look like rabbit horses."
  • "Everyone is all, 'follow your heart.' If that worked I'd be watching Shadowhunters in my spaceship."
  • "Am I making this up?"
  • "I don't condone it, but I understand it, and therefore, I will not pass judgment on it."
  • "I can eat a pound of pork rinds."
  • "I am your bird king!"
  • "Baby pigs or baby cows? They're both good options."
  • "I have deleted a single photo from my phone. I have room for one selfie. Living on the edge. If it happens, no second chances."
  • "She gets it at a Shadowhunter tailor where we get all our stuff. Are you serious?"
  • "My cell phone is not the most important thing in my life. It just feels that way."
  • "Kill her immediately. Problem solved."
  • "You're not me? Most people aren't, in my experience."
  • "Man I've spent a whole year talking about sailboats and I could have just jumped on this SHIP."
  • "Reminder not to cite 'game of thrones' as my motivation for getting into politics."
  • "To all the people who threaten to punch me in the face... Do I have to be concerned or is that a love thing?"
  • "Put this on?! Fit it on my body?!"
  • "I’m going to shave today. Nobody will recognize me and I’ll have to reintroduce myself to all my friends."
  • "Don't get me started on this question."
  • "Okay, quick question. What does it mean when someone says they are your 'trash?' Asking for a friend..."
  • "Wait, 'SexyBack' is by Justin Timberlake?"
  • "Everyone's smooching everyone and Alec just wants to do his job. That's why he's the best and deserves a big smooch."
Things The Signs Have Said That Break My Heart
  • Aries: Was I ever anything more than a sad kid? I thought the drugs would help, but they just make you sadder and a little deader. I really tried my best, but I don't think there's much use anymore. Nobody cared then, and nobody cares now.
  • Taurus: I'm sorry, but I fell in love with you. I watch you move and I'm captivated. The world slows down just a little bit when I look at you. I wanna kiss your long neck, and run my fingers through your curly hair. I wanna listen to you talk for hours about old movies and bad music. I wanna hear every word that you have to say. But I can't, because you're in love with someone else
  • Gemini: I dreamed so much as a little kid. All those dreams are dead know. The world has a lot of fun killing little girls dreams.
  • Cancer: Please don't go! Stay! Stay! I need you to stay! No one ever stays.
  • Leo: I used to be special. Everyone thought I was going to be this amazing person. They thought I would do great things, but look at me. I'm nothing. If I was anything, it would be a failure.
  • Virgo: She just left. She didn't say anything. In one simple second, all the love and laughter that we had, was ripped from both of us. She just decided she did't feel like loving me anymore.
  • Libra: It's all gone. Any hope that I had is gone.
  • Scorpio: Do you think that if I get prettier, he might look at me like he used to? Maybe he'll love me again.
  • Sagittarius: The whole world is at my fingertips, they say, but I can't seem to ever grab it.
  • Capricorn: I could tell she didn't love me anymore. She would smile, but in her eyes I could see the pity and slight disgust she had for me. I tried to stop loving her, but I couldn't. I felt pathetic, like I was stood up. But this time I couldn't just go home and forget about it the next day. She was, and still is, my everything.
  • Aquarius: I don't want to feel this anymore. I don't want to be trapped in my mind. I want to live again. I just want to see the light one more time.
  • Pisces: Could you just tell me you love me? You don't have to mean it. I just want, for a second, to feel loved.

andrew taking care of neil. wrappin him in a towel. washin his hair. givin him kisses. helping him get dressed. checkin his booboos. suckin his dick.

“Simon looks stunning in a grey suit.”

Carry On facts people forget/need to remember more:

-I like seeing cute chubby Simon pics, bc he’s healthy and happy, but do remember that Simon is actually so skinny he looks ill in Carry On yikes

-Also Simon has golden brown/ bronze hair! Not blonde, I dont know where people even get that from

- Penny is chubby and a genius and I love her

- One of Baz’s grandparents are Egyptian

- Simon played a hand in both his parents deaths

- Baz has pretty eyes

- Baz goes to university at the London School of Economics /which is fucking hard to get into/ (trust me I’m doing uni applications now, I didn’t even understand their website ffs)

- Simon is actually pretty rich, and was left a lot of money

- Baz has a Japanese toilet

-Simon more than anything wants to learn how to drive

- Baz wants to teach at Watford when he’s older

-Baz smokes

-Simon is 5ft 10

-Baz is 6ft 1

-Baz plays the violin

-Simon can sword fight like come on



this is Max, my most beloved bear of all time. He’s over 20 years old and I sleep with him every single night. Well as you can see, max wasn’t looking so hot. He’s been matted for the past 15+ years and no matter how much brushing or cleaning I gave him he was always matted at oily looking. Well I recently came upon a method to clean and detangle faux fur, and I decided to try it on my best friend here. After about an hour of tender love and care he looks much better!!!

So here’s what you’ll need:
Hair detangling spray 💧
A fine toothed pet brush ✨
A hairdryer 💨
(Some patience, depending on how bad the tangles are) 👼

Go through and work on your friend one patch at a time. Spray down the patch with detangling spray and then brush through gently with the pet brush until all knots appear to be out. If you need to, use your fingers to pull out dirt or large mats. Then with the hairdryer on ❄️COOL❄️, dry the patch and repeat as many times as needed

Voilà! Cleaner and fluffier stuffie!✨🐻✨

I hope this helps some of you!!! ❤️❤️❤️

A Night In - Elijah Mikaelson

Request: Can you do a sorta fluffy one shot of Elijah from the originals? Can it be that you’re really having a terrible day and when you get outta work Elijah is waiting there to pick you up to bring you back to the compound where he surprises you with a nice quiet evening in? ((Anon))

Warnings: None? Emotional commitment? a bad day at work?

Pairing: Elijah Mikaelson x reader

Originally posted by elijah-daily


“Hey, I need these processes by Wednesday.” Your boss places another file full of paperwork on your desk. You suppress the desire to punch him.

“Okay.” He walks out, shutting the door behind him.

“Fuck you asshole, process your own paperwork you lazy fuck.” You curse him out from behind the door as you sign yet another document.

Today was just not your day. First, the hot water heater in the compound is broken so you had a cold shower, then your hair just wouldn’t go how you wanted it to, and finally, your boss had decided that today he was going to receive the award for biggest asshole ever.

So yeah, it was not going well. You were desperately waiting down the clock, ready to punch out as soon as the clock hit 4:00. You tear out of the building so fast you barely get time to say goodbye to Luke, the front desk man, before you’re out the door.

You tap your fingers on the steering wheel impatiently as you sit in after-work traffic. The radio was playing quietly and the sun was setting behind your car. You relax back into your seat, the warmth of your car made you feel better. That is until, someone in the car behind you beeps their horn.

“Jesus fuck-!” You curse as you sit straight up again and look around you. The traffic still wasn’t moving.

“Hey asshole! Fuck you!” You beep your horn at him and throw your hand out the window, whipping him off.

“We’re all waiting you piece of shit!"  Road rage, just what you needed.

"Fuck that guy.” You sigh and put the window back up, closing your eyes and trying to relax again. Your phone starts ringing and you dig around in your purse to find it.

“Hello?” You mutter angrily into the phone.

“Well hello to you too, beautiful.” You sigh when you hear Elijah’s voice.

“Hi, sorry, I haven’t been having a good day.” You can hear him walking up the stairs.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Elijah asks. You sigh.

“Not really, just keep the house warm for me, yeah?” He hums.

“Of course.” You smile. Traffic starts to move.

“I love you. I’ve gotta get off, traffic’s starting to move now.”

“I love you too.” You hang up and start to drive.


When you get home, Elijah is sitting on the couch. He’s not wearing his suit, instead he’s wearing sweatpants and a tee shirt. You kick off your shoes and tell him you’ll be down in a minute, you wanna get changed into something comfy. You finally get down stairs, baggy tee shirt, pj shorts and fuzzy socks, he’s still waiting.

You smile at him and lay down with him, your head on his chest. He pulls a blanket over you and flicks on the TV, displaying Harry Potter and The Sorcerers Stone. You smile and snuggle into him more.

“So what did you do today?” He runs a hand through your hair as you talk.

“I finished hiring the contractors for the work here, helped Hope with her math, and I had the water heater fixed.” You draw shapes on his covered chest dormantly as he talks.

“Oh thank god you thought of getting the heater fixed.” You say as he turns the TV down.

“Some of the bedrooms are cleared out as well, the furniture is coming tomorrow.” You smile and shuffle up to get level with him.

“I love you.” He brings his hand up to your cheek.

“I love you too.” He pulls you down to kiss him and you kiss him back, only breaking it when you smile again.

Going to an Amusement Park with Astro!
  • JinJin telling you to be there super early so you can all be the first to get in
  • So you arrive early only to find that they’re not there
  • “Where are you guys?”
  • “Eunwoo had to make everyone packed lunches so we’re running late wAIT FOR US”
  • Sanha jumping up and down and screaming with excitement when he sees his favourite rides
  • MJ getting pumped too and screaming along with Sanha
  • Moonbin and Rocky being apprehensive about the Haunted House ride
  • “You…you really wanna go on that one first Sanha?” Rocky chuckles nervously
  • You having to go on the scary rides twice to sit with Rocky and Moonbin each time because they need to be looked after
  • Sanha getting pouty because his hair went all curly from the water ride
  • JinJin dying with laughter
  • Next is Bumper Cars
  • Eunwoo making sure everyone has their seatbelt on before it starts
  • All 6 of them ganging up on you and trying to circle you so you can’t move
  • MJ feeling bad because it’s 6 against one so he fights back with you and you both manage to knock everyone else out
  • MJ lifting you up in the air and swinging you around singing “WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS” really loudly
  • The other boys making excuses as to why they lost
  • “My wheel was stuck so that’s why I couldn’t push anyone back! - JinJin
  • You ruffling his hair and saying “Shh, it’s okay to admit you suck”
  • Everyone dies of laughter
  • Moonbins tummy starts making noises similar to that of a demon in hell
  • “Guys…lunchtime…pls?”
  • Everyone tucking into Eunwoo’s home-made sandwiches and tHEY TASTE SO GOOD WTF
  • Rocky sharing his chips with you and feeding you them from across the table
  • “Have some of mine too noona!” Sanha shoves a chip into your mouth
  • “I’m still hungry” MJ starts whining and then spies a candyfloss stall
  • You all go and get candyfloss in different colours and MJ buys like 3 sticks and wolfs them down in one go
  • “Let’s go on the roller-coaster next!”
  • Since there’s an uneven number, MJ sits this one out because he feels sick from eating too much candyfloss POOR BABY
  • Rocky, JinJin, Moonbin anfd Eunwoo coming off the ride looking somewhat traumatised while you and Sanha are still hyped af
  • “Uhhhh…we’re good…how about the carousel instead??”
  • MJ agreeing to a slow, docile ride as his stomach still isn’t 100% so you give him cuddles to make him feel better, thus resulting in the whole group comforting him too
  • Everyone picking what horse they want to ride on the carousel and Moonbin getting on the back of yours and giving you sweet little cuddles from behind
  • JinJin feels left out so he pulls himself in front of you so you hold on to him so he doesn’t fall
  • Then the ride instructor shouts at you all and tells you all to get off because it’s a safety hazard and Sanha, Rocky, MJ and Eunwoo laugh their asses off at the 3 of you having to do the walk of shame off the ride
  • JinJin feeling bad that he ruined the ride for you and apologising over and over
  • “I’ll make it up to you”
  • When everyone joins back up, you all wander to prize machines with cute plushies inside
  • “I’ll win you one!” Rocky shouts as he sprints over to the machine pulling out loose change from his pockets
  • “No! I want to win her one!
  • “Me too!”
  • No, me!” they all shout and you smile and blush bc how cute is that
  • But JinJin wins you a cute Rilakkuma plushie first and he hands it to you
  • “You have to call it JinJin because I won it for you” he smirks and of course you call it JinJin bc why wouldn’t you
  • MJ wins a plushie and ends up giving it to Sanha because Sanha couldn’t even work the claw machine bless him
  • When it’s time to go home, you all get ice-cream except MJ because he still feels queezy from earlier
  • “Next week we should go to the aquarium!” Eunwoo suggests
  • You all agree and think it’s an amazing idea as long as Eunwoo makes packed lunch again
  • MJ agrees and also agrees to take it easy if he finds a candyfloss stall there
  • And they all wave goodbye to you while you hold on to your new plushie JinJin and make your way home <3
Baby Korean 8: Washing your hair

You just came back from a 노래방 and your are kind of drunk. You have all food and sauses from the food you orded in your head and you need to 머리를 감아요 really baddly.

You go into the bathroom and 샾푸를 덜어요, after that you 머리를 숙이고 감아요. But there is the sauce still remained so then you try again but only 머리를 물로 적셔요 . You scrub your hair so much that 거품이 났어요.

You once again 샾푸를 덜어요 because you like to rinse and repeat.
But this time 눈에 샴푸가 들어갔어요!

Such a bad day today right?

Once more you 머리를 물로 적셔요 and then 머리를 말려요. After you 머리를 말라요 you 두피를 마사지해요

As you go to sleep you realise that you did not 머리를 빗어요 but you don’t care.. you are drunk.

8 Vocab 머리를 감다- When you wash your hair. 삼푸를 덜다 - When you dispense your shampoo 머리를 숙이고 감다- When your lower your head to wash your hair 머리를 물로 적시다 - Wetting your hair with water 거품이 나다 - When bubbles come out 머리를 말리다 - when you are drying your hair 눈에 ___가/이 들어가다 - when something goes in your eyes.
I Need To Get This Out There

I have severe eczema all over my body, including my face.  There are few things that people do/ say that drive me mental.  Let’s go:


You think this would be common fucking sense, but NOPE!  The amount of fucking stares I get when I am minding my own business is unbelievable.  Imagine if you got a really bad hair cut and everywhere you went people were staring at you.  Even when you catch them staring they continue to do so.  It makes you feel like you are two inches.  Now multiply that feeling by 10 and that is what people with eczema feel like.

2) Do Not Point it Out

Yes I know it is there, I can feel it.  I ask you: What good does it do to point it out?  It is not dirt; I cannot just wipe it off to get rid of it.  This also adds to the anxiety that eczema causes and it is flat out rude.

3) Do Not Say: “It’s gross!” or “It looks painful!” or “It looks dry!” etc.

Look I know how it looks like to the public.  I cannot help how it looks.  Trust me it looks gross to me as well.  However, there is nothing I can do to really change how it looks or how long the recovery takes.  Plus, it is painful and no amount of pain-killers will get rid of the pain.

4) “You should cover it up!” 

HAHAHAHAHA! It is not that fucking simple man! First of all, eczema heats up really quickly.  If someone is the cover the area the eczema will burn said person, until it hits the cold.  Secondly, if they were to put say foundation on it both of these scenarios will happen.  When eczema is covered, the patch will look hella dry.  All it will do is make it look less inflamed rather than be a solution.  Let’s say that the person has a lot of makeup skills to make it look invisible, makeup will still hinder it.  like covering it up with cloth, the eczema will burn underneath causing the flare to worsen.

5) “You should try this (insert over the counter drug/natural ‘remedy’)”

At this point just shut the fuck up.  Let’s start with the drug argument shall we.  Do you honestly think I would not be keeping tabs on new products and not testing them out.  I know of pretty much all of the drugs out there and they do not work.  Correction, they work for those who are extremely mild or for people who think they have eczema when they don’t and only have a normal rash.  all those creams do is num the itch so you don’t scratch.  They do not stop it!  Now for the natural “remedy” crap.  Let’s get this clear,  THERE IS NO FUCKING CURE FOR ECZEMA!  For those who says “I used this all natural mixture/oil/whatever that my alchemist recommended and it cured my/baby’s/whoever eczema” That is all fucking bullshit!  Like with the over the counter, it more or less nums it.  A lot of the ingredients they use are mild moisturizers.  Now moisturizers are need to help the healing process of a flare, but like I said before, there is no cure.  These moisturizers just get rid of the dryness which prevents spread, not riding the body of it.  With this said, these moisturizers (more or less they are oil based) are mild.  These oils are primarily used in adding into things like steroid creams.  It adds to the moisture content on top of the pre-moisturized area and working power of the steroid. This argument drives me more nuts than the over the counter one because of my Teta. I know they are trying to help, but you are not a doctor, do not try to act as one.

6. “Have you tried taking cold showers?” or “Have you tried moisturizing?”

Of course I have! I personally hate cold showers, but because of the eczema, it is the only option I have unless I want it to spread.  It is one of the advices you receive from the doctor along with the application of moisturizers once your eczema starts flaring. 


No shit sherlock! I know they are bad for you, however they are all I have right now.  There is no other way to really treat it currently without harmful medication.  So unless you are researching a cure for eczema, do not preach to me about how bad they are and what they may cause, because I already know.


I already know that.  However, it is a mental issue.  Role-play time again!  Imagine that you have a feather lightly going over your skin.  After a while, you want to bat it away.  Now imagine if you were not allowed to bat it away.  It would eventually dive you nuts and you will knock it way.  Again multiply that feeling by ten and that is what a person with eczema had to deal with.  The point of which we need to scratch is our breaking point.  Eczema legit will drive us mad, to the point we will do anything to stop it, even if it means worsening it.

Those are only some of the thing people with eczema have to deal with.  I probably missed a tone of comments that drive us nuts.  If you know of someone with eczema DO NOT do/say these things to them.  If you have some things that dives you nuts feel free to add.  If you do not have eczema and have questions please feel free to ask me.

requested by ssprayberrythings
gif cr to the owner

The football team has training again. You wanted to hook up with Archie but you haven’t been proud enough and he’s also your friend and you were too scared to ask him to go out with you.

But you have nothing to do. So, what’s bad about going to watch the training of Riverdale’s Bulldogs? Nothing, I guess, you say to yourself, going to the football team.

The ground is wet. It was raining all day but it stopped finally. You can see some cheerleaders who they’re watching the training but they are just cheerleaders. It’s nothing special to see them here. And then, you see that red haired boy. Archie Andrews.

He’s wearing his football dress with all the things he needs for the football. He looks so good in the football dress but… Is he wearing #9? It used to be Jason’s number…

“There’s my favorite girl!” Archie says with a smile on his face as he’s running to you.
“Where’s that girl? I can’t see her anywhere.” You laugh, looking at him.
“Hey, (Y/N). I’m sorry, honey. I thought we could go somewhere but… The match, you know.” Archie looks kinda nervous but you’re surprised but the thing what he said. By the thing that he wanted to go out with you.
“That’s okay, Archie. I understand our team has to be the best.” You smile a little, looking at the ground.
“Will you wait for me or?”
You look at Archie. Another surprise for you! “I think I’ll wait but you should be training with other boys now.” Archie gives you a smile, coming back to the field.

That was really strange for you and you can’t think about anything else in the rest of the training. You’re sitting in the stands, watching the training. But suddenly, Archie fell down. “Oh my God!” You’re in shock, running down to the field to see what happened to Archie.

You kneel down. “Archie, wake up!” You shake with him. He’s breathing. There are other players around you, together with the trainer.
“Hey, get him a water! And you,” you point at some player, “lift his feet!”

You wait for the water and then, you pour water on a piece of your jacket, trying to moisten his lips. “Come on, Archie.” You whisper to yourself.

Archie opens his eyes, looking at you. “Am I in heaven already?” He asks with a little smile on his face.
“Oh God, Archie. I got so scared!” You caress him on his cheek.
“It really looks like I’m in heaven.”
“Why, you fool?”
“Because this beautiful angel saved me.”

dan’s livestream 3.14.17

- first topic he brought up was Phil hitting 4M subs & thanked us for it

- “i love bumblebees.” 

- 1 on 1 meditation time


- “i was really mad, i was so angry when he told me” when phil told him about the gym story

- “promoting my pal’s new video aside, go watch it if you’re having a bad day.”

- “4 years ago…no one would have liked my curly hair.”

- “we can all change what we like, who we are, and that’s ok.”


- i need to get hiking shoes

- “this has just been fun, i didn’t even realize an hour had passed.”

- “cya next time, internet buddies.”

How The Batkids Get Batmom’s Attention at a Gala

I got this idea from @whore4batfam‘s post on Bruce

Dick made her a bracelet that she wears at all these fancy events, so he’ll just walk by and snap it on her wrist. She always go, “Ow, Dick what?” Since she knows somethings up.

Jason would just sneak up on her and hug her around the waist, the first few times it made her jump. Now she just looks down and raises a brow, then he tries to act all sweet to get her to stop whatever she was doing and walk off with her.

Tim, having gone to events like this with his parents, feels bad interrupting. So he just pulls on the hem of her skirt, and she’ll kneel down to be at his level so he can tell her whatever he needed.

His are usually the most important because he HATEs interrupting them.

Cass (I decided to add her this time) is sly. She purposefully screws up her hair or makeup so they have to go to the bathroom to fix it, where she feels comfortable talking freely.

Damian will ask to dance with her, and then take her to a part of the dance floor no one is at so they are alone. He knows she likes to dance, especially with her family, so he figures she’ll listen if she’s enjoying herself. She’d listen either way, but it’s a nice gesture.

BONUS: Bruce literally just grabs her hands and drags her off. She always goes “Bruce stop I’m in heels!” Because it makes them both laugh. He sometimes will scoop her up instead and carry her off so she can’t use that excuse.

I'm...Sorry? (Dad!Tony Stark x Reader x Bucky)

This was requested by @georghiousophia so if you like it thank her ♡

“This is bad, this is very, very bad.”

“You need to just calm down, take a deep brea-”

“Would you shut up already?!” You barked, whirling around to glare at Bucky, who now stood wide eyed in your doorway. “Are you just not grasping how big of a deal this is or do you just not care?” You paused, staring at him in the hopes that he’d answer but his silence only fueled your anger even further.

“You’re so stupid-THIS is stupid! This whole THING is stupid and Tony is going to kill me!” You shouted, frustratedly tugging on your hair. “First he’s going to kill you, and then me. And if he doesn’t kill me, he’ll never look at me again.”

“Babe-” Bucky started, moving towards you.

“I don’t have time for petty nicknames!” You screamed, jumping up and away from him. “Just go away!”

Your eyes widened when you were suddenly whirled around, and Bucky’s hands were on your shoulders. “Look at me,” He growled.

Suddenly timid and shy, you kept your gaze fixed on his chest.

“Look. At. Me.” His hand was under your chin then, and you blushed as he tilted your head up. His voice was soft when he spoke this time. “How long have we been dating?”

“…Over a year,” You murmured, eyes filling with tears.

“And how many times have we talked about breaking up?”

“…Never,” You answered again, trying to look down again but he held you still, blue eyes searching yours.

“And how many times have we talked about the future?”

You sniffled. “A lot.” You felt, and must have looked, pathetic right now. A tear slid down your cheek and you quickly pushed your face into Bucky’s chest, embarrassed that you were crying.

His hands were suddenly on your back, one warm and splayed against your lower spine, the other tracing patterns onto your shoulder. The cool metal of his fingers was soothing and you struggled to repress the shudder that threatened to tear through you.

“One year isn’t a long time to be having a baby together,” You sniffled, gaze blurry as you stared at the fabric of his shirt. “Even if we’re adults. Especially with our jobs, oh God Bucky-”

“Stop thinking about all the negatives right now and just let me hold you baby girl,” Bucky commanded, his grip on you tightening.

You nodded, trying to ignore the erratic thudding of your heart. How could you possibly tell your daddy, the man who worshipped you, that his only daughter, was pregnant before being married, and with his co worker too?

“He’s going to punch you in the face.”

There was a soft sigh from above you. “I know.”

* * *

It was weeks before you decided to tell your father about the predicament you were in. The only other person who knew was Steve, who both you and Bucky had gone to for guidance. He’d been shocked, but the idea had quickly settled with him and his happiness for the two of you had allowed both you and Bucky to calm down some, even smile about it all. But the stress and guilt of having not yet told your father was making you ill. You couldn’t even be around him, and it was taking a toll on you.

“You’re looking thin,” Bucky commented as he watched you, suddenly pulling from your thoughts.

“P-pardon?” You met his gaze over the paper he was reading and watched as he studied you.

“Your cheekbones, they’re looking sharper.”

Gingerly, you reached up and gently felt them. Were you really losing weight?

Sighing, Bucky gently set the paper down on the table and dragged his chair over to your side of the table. “You should be gaining weight, not losing it.” He gently pushed your (h/c) hair away from your eyes and placed a gentle kiss on top of your head. “You’re lucky you don’t have morning sickness, please don’t make yourself sick baby doll.”

You slowly leaned into him, before letting out a deep sigh. “I should tell him today shouldn’t?”

You felt your boyfriend nod. “You’ll have to eventually anyway, you might as well be the one to tell him instead of letting him find out.”

Eyes squeezed shut, you slowly pulled away from Bucky before looking over at the door to your apartment. “I’ll be home soon.”

* * *

How long had it been?

You had no idea.

Hours? Minutes? Seconds? Your fear and the erratic beating of your heart seemed to slow time. Your heart felt like a caged animal, struggling to free itself from your ribcage.

‘Just go in there, and tell him,’ You encouraged yourself. ‘He had you when he was young too, and he’s your dad, you know he’ll love you AND the baby anyways.’

You felt like throwing up.

Without thinking about it, you stepped forward and raised your hand to knock on the door to his office, flinching every time your knuckles struck the glass.

“Come in!”

The urge to run away was so strong you had to stand still for a few moments before you forced yourself to turn the handle, taking in a deep breath as you did so.

“Dad?” You asked, sticking your head in before stepping in.

“Hi pumpkin,” He grinned up at you from where he sat, what seemed to be old electronics surrounded him on his desk. “What’s up?”

“Oh, nothing,” You offered a shaky smile and cursed yourself when his smile fell.

“What happened?” He demanded standing from his desk and moving towards you, dark brows furrowed.

“Dad, I’m fine, really-” Your jaw was in his hand then and you grunted as he turned your face, inspecting you for any marks.

“Did something happen? Did Bucky relapse? Were you training? Was-”

“Dad!” You laughed, pushing him away. “I’m fine, really.”

Tony stared at you for a few moments before crossing his arms over his chest. “Well I wouldn’t know, you haven’t spoken to me in weeks.”

You winced at that, quickly avoiding his gaze. “I’m sorry…” You mumbled, unable to think of an excuse. “I’ve been really busy lately.”

‘Just tell him,’ You shouted in your head.

“Daddy we have to talk-”

Tony sucked in a sharp breath. “You never call me daddy. This can’t be good.”

You felt your palms start to sweat. “Can we sit down? It’s awkward just-standing here.” You smiled at him, but you were almost certain it looked much more like a grimace.

He only nodded though, before moving back to his desk where he sat himself upon it. “Okay go.”


“I’m sitting now go.”

“I kind of want to sit too-”

“I feel like whatever news you have will require me to be the one who’s sitting,” He said, eyebrows raised. “So please, go.”

You took in a gulp of air before you shuffled forward and wrapped your arms around him. It had felt like so long since you’d hugged him and without warning you felt tears start to slide down your cheeks.

“Pumpkin?” He asked, seemingly startled.

“You’re going to hate me,” You whispered shakily, knowing that if you spoke any louder you were going to cry.

“Bunny, nothing you do could ever make me hate you,” He said, sounding worried as he rubbed your back. “You’re my pumpkin.”

“Pinky promise?” You asked, pulling back as you wiped your eyes so you could look at him. He frowned, nodding.

“You’re freaking me out a bit here (Y/N), what’s going on?”

Without pausing to think about it any longer, you simply blurted it out.

“I’m pregnant.”

He was silent, staring up at you for what seemed like hours before he finally spoke.

“I’m assuming that the baby is Bucky’s.”

You nodded. “Of course dad.”

“But I thought you were using birth control.”

“I am.”

“I know you’re older now, but I thought you were using condoms.”

“We are.” Your words were shaky and you could feel your cheeks heating up.

“Well then what-”

“It broke dad.”



Your father sighed, running his hand down his face. “How far along are you?”

You stared down at your feet, gently pulling on your fingers. “A few weeks…”

“So this is why you’ve been avoiding me.”

You were blushing quite a bit now and you nodded, keeping your gaze on the floor.

“You do realize I’m going to have to kill that boyfriend of yours.”

“Dad-” Your head snapped up. “It takes two to tango you know.” You raised your eyebrows at him and laughed when you realized he was making the same exasperated expression.

He stood then, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into him. “I had you when I was young too, and I didn’t have an extra set of hands to help me and you were still the greatest thing to ever happen to me. You-” He said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Will be a wonderful mother, especially with a team of superheroes behind you to help.”

The weight that had been crushing you for the past few weeks suddenly lifted and you breathed a deep sigh of relief. “You have no idea how much it means to hear you say that.”

Tony pulled away from you then, gently patting your head before he scooped up his phone from his desk and started towards the door.

“Dad, where are you going?”

“To beat up your boyfriend.”


i need the entire s4 of fdtd to be kate, seth and richie going across the country and robbing banks and sharing shitty motel rooms. richie complaining because kate and seth take the only bed and whines on the floor all night. they all get matching tattoos. they stress freddie out on the reg and give him like a million gray hairs but its okay bc he lowkey loves them. seth and kate kissing the first time and richie being a jealous bean. kate protecting the gecko brothers because shes a bad ass bitch.