this guy is me from a past life

How to Write Successful Dialogue

@albino-troll-ninja asked:

Got any feedback/advice/links for someone who wants to make lengthy, relatively action-less dialogues between characters more than just “‘Loren ipsum,’ he said.” “'Ipsum lorem’, she replied.” for forty paragraphs?

No problem!  I love dialogue, so I’m happy to be of assistance in this department.  

Here are my personal rules of thumb:

1.  Allow the dialogue to show the character’s personality.

If you really think about your conversations, it can be telling exactly how much of someone’s personality can shine through when they speak.  

Allow your character’s persona, values, and disposition to spill over when they speak, and it will make for a significantly more interesting read for you and your reader. 

For example:  let’s take a look at a mundane exchange, and see how it can be spruced up by injecting it with a good dose of personality.

Exhibit A)

“How was your day, by the way?”  asked Oscar, pouring himself a drink.

“Not too bad,” replied Byron.  “Cloudy, but warm.  Not too many people.”

“That’s nice.”   

Exhibit B) 

“How was your day, by the way?” asked Oscar, pouring himself a drink. 

“Ugh.  Not too bad,” groaned Byron, draping himself on the couch.  “Warm, but dreary.  Gray clouds as far as the eye could see.  Not anyone worth mentioning out this time of year.”  A pause.  “Well, except me, of course.”

“Hmmph,” said Oscar, glancing over his shoulder.  “If it were me, I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

Isn’t that better?  Already, the audience will feel as though they’ve gotten to know these characters. 

This works for longer dialogue, too:  allow the character’s personal beliefs, life philosophy, and generally disposition to dictate how they talk, and your readers will thank you.

Of course, this example is also good for giving the reader a general sense of what the characters’ relationship is like.  Which brings me to my next point:

2.  Allow the dialogue to show the character’s relationship. 

Everyone is a slightly different person depending on who they’re around.  Dynamic is an important thing to master, and when you nail it between two characters, sparks can fly.

Work out which character assumes more of the Straight Man role, and which is quicker to go for lowbrow humor.  Think of who’s the more analytical of the two and who’s the more impulse driven.  Who would be the “bad cop” if the situation called for it.  

Then, allow for this to show in your dialogue, and it will immediately become infinitely more entertaining.

Example:  

“Alright,” said Fogg, examining the map before him.  “Thus far, we’ve worked out how we’re going to get in through the ventilation system, and meet up in the office above the volt.  Then, we’re cleared to start drilling.”

Passepartout grinned.  “That’s what she said.” 

“Oh, for the love of God – REALLY, Jean.  Really!?  We are PLANNING a goddamn bank robbery!”

Some more questions about dynamic to ask yourself before writing dialogue: 

  • Who is more likely to talk and who is more likely to listen? 
  • Who would talk with their mouth full of food and who would politely wait to swallow?
  • Is their relationship fraternal/sororal?  If so, who would be the “little sibling?”
  • Is one of them a bit of a mother/father figure to the other? 
  • Who more frequently gets irritated with who?
  • Who has the more understated sense of humor?  Who’s a bit more juvenile?
  • Who’s better educated?  Does it show when they speak?
  • Who’s a bit more pretentious/full of themselves?
  • Who interrupts more?
  • Who swears more?

This can also be a valuable tool to cluing your reader in on who the characters are as people: 

3.  Think about what this dialogue can tell the reader.

It’s better to fill the reader in more gradually than to waist your valuable first chapter on needless exposition, and dialogue is a great way to do it.  

Think about what your characters are saying, and think about ways in which you can “sneak in” details about their past, their families, and where they came from into the discussion.  

For example, you could say:

Tuckerfield was a happy-go-lucky Southern guy with domineering parents,

and bore everyone to death.  

Or you could have him say: 

“Sheesh.  All this sneakin’ around in the woods late at night reminds me of being back in Kansas.  Good times, man, good times.”  There was a pause, before he added,  “‘Course, it wasn’t nearly so fun when I came home late for curfew and had to sleep on the front step, but y’know.  Life happens.”

Isn’t that much better than the omnipresent monotone?

Dialogue is also a great way to fill in potential plot holes early on, by having your characters talk them out and explain them. 

Moreover, dialogue can also be used to foreshadow, offer relevant hints about the climax, or provide information necessary for the resolution.  

So use it wisely!  

4.  Sprinkle in mini-actions throughout. 

Even in actionless dialogue, no one actually does nothing.  In my case, for example, I stim a lot.  I play with my hair.  I play with eating utensils.  It’s probably very annoying for those around me, but you get the point.

Less fidget-y folks might not do this as much, but they rarely sit totally still during conversations, either.  So occasionally add in these mini-actions, and it will make your characters feel a bit less like disembodied voices or floating heads.

For instance:  

Jo leaned back in her chair rolling her stiff neck from sitting still for so long.  “…So the way I see it,” she continued.  “Even if Pheris Beuller’s Day Off didn’t take place in Cameron’s imagination, Pheris was clearly a sociopath whose behavior shouldn’t be glamorized.”

“Ha.  As if.”  Avery paused to sip her root beer.  “Pheris,” she began, raising an index finger.  “Was clearly emblematic of counterculturist movements such as the Beat Generation, and his disregard for the capitalistic dogmas imposed upon younger generations is something to be admired.” 

“For Christ’s sake, will you two lighten up?”  scoffed Leo, counting out bills for the pizza.  “We were talking about which movie we wanted to watch tonight.  Jesus.”

5.  Remember how people actually speak.

In real life conversations, people don’t speak in paragraphs.  Alright, some people might, and this can actually be interesting as the personality aspect of a certain type of character.  

But generally speaking, people don’t speak in paragraphs, or as though they’re writing thought-out prose or letters.

In real conversations, people stutter.  They laugh at their own jokes, repeat words or phrases, and lose their train of thought.

Naturally, you don’t have to illustrate in your writing exactly how chaotic and mundane human speech can be, as writing would be pretty boring in general if it was strictly limited to miming reality.  But it’s good to keep in mind that your characters are talking, not writing in purple prose.

Exhibit A: 

“When I was a young boy, my mother and I had a most tumultuous relationship,” said Marcus.  “She saw me as a hallmark of her past failures, and took every opportunity to remind me as such.”     

Exhibit B:

“My mom, when I was kid, we had what you’d call a sort of tumultuous relationship,” said Marcus.  “Nothing I ever did was right for her.  She, uh – I think she saw me as sort of a hallmark of her past failures.  Took every opportunity to remind me of that.”    

Which of these is more organic, more easy to visualize, and more telling of character?  Unless the point of this dialogue is to illustrate that Marcus is a gentleman crook of some kind with pristine speaking mannerisms, I’m going to say the latter. 


Best of luck, I hope this helps, and happy writing!  <3

a must read!

All right guys! I know some of you have read either The Foxhole Court and/or The Raven Cycle. Some of you may or may not also have read Aristotle and Dante discover the secrets of the universe? Yeah? Right?

I’ve got something for you: Silent by Sara Alva

It’s a must read I accidentally stumbled upon yesterday. It’s this absolutely beautiful, yet heart wrenching and unique novel about a gay kid, Alex, that gets thrown into the foster care system where he meets this other guy, Sebastian, who’s mute. It’s about dark pasts, survival, love and coming out.

After I finished it I looked it up here on tumblr and could hardly find anything. NOTHING. And it actually broke my heart a little since it’s such a beautiful story and truly deserves more attention. SO READ IT. It’s not even 4 USD on smashwords. And it’s so so so worth it!

And after you’ve read it? TALK TO ME <3

”Alex’s life as a teenager in South Central LA is far from perfect, but it’s his life, and he knows how to live it. He knows what role to play and what things to keep to himself. He’s got it all under control, until one lousy pair of shoes kicks him out of his world and lands him in a foster care group home. Surrounded by strangers and trapped in a life where he could never belong, Alex turns to the only person lower on the social ladder than he is: a “special” mute boy. In Sebastian, Alex finds a safe place to store his secrets—those that sent him to foster care, and the deeper one that sets him apart from the other teenagers he knows. But Sebastian has secrets of his own, and when tragedy rips the two boys apart, Alex will stop at nothing to find the answers—even if it means dragging them both through a past full of wounds best left buried. It might just be worth it, for the slim chance at love.” [goodreads link

17.01.29  fancafe - bts_Rap Monster

23:43
thoughts

are you guys having a happy holiday?

Nowadays, I’ve been thinking to what extent can thoughts run away. although it’s together with me the whole time, though my dreams are coming true, it brings me down too. I thought growing older was a process where you know more of when to let go of this friend but it’s still hard to control my mind and thoughts

I heard someone say that. To say “oo hurt me” is matter of fact an illusion. Whatever happens to me, I’ll decide whether how much damage is inflicted by it, whether I acknowledge the pain or not, whether or not I’m going to fall apart. I really think I know but I still don’t get it. Not everyone can know my heart. What about you guys, how does it touch you?

worrying about how to live. I believed that if you what you love, and accomplish things, you could see what’s next but I still don’t have an answer. maybe forever. each person would write their own book of their own ways right? how to live? how to be happy? If you read the books, very good people have firmly put down their own definition. It’s not just me with an idle repulsion. right? maybe because it’s their own books.

I didn’t want to be a twisted person but.
A few days ago, a taxi driver with a cool voice recommended me a book, he said “if you read this book you will know the reason as to why we read classic books of geniuses such as Edison, Einstein, Leonardo Da Vinci. People like me or young men like you are not geniuses. But if you read those books and feel a little, the wisdom of those geniuses will fall and settle into our minds like dew drops. Then it could become a big help in your life..” I nodded my head without realizing. That was a kind of rebellion. But because many phrases from books have come to my salvation, I had no choice but to agree.

Anyway…I think this has become to long. I couldn’t go to the studio over the past few weeks. we all need our own hiding place. I hope you guys too can get rid of your thoughts with no such answers, whether by replying to this post, through music like me, or by making your own posts, doing whatever work you do, or resting on your holiday break. I hope to spend this year a litter nicer. nevertheless. let’s smile more. your own burdens are the heaviest but lets share them with each other sometimes. Please have a happy new year.

(–)(__)(–)
heart’s new year bow

- RM

trans; @hobuing | do not repost or crop credit

orgasms and dildos C.H

Originally posted by bestpicsof5sos

warning: smut

word count: 2000+

summary: y/n can’t orgasm no matter what you and Calum do so after convincing Calum gets you off with a vibrator and dildo.

requested?: yes, sorry if it sucked @lukeasfuck i tried 😊. This is my first request and I enjoyed writing it so feel free to request any smut ideas you might have. I’m pretty open to all suggestions 😉.

________________________________________________________________

Keep reading

Clancey, Labrador Retriever (4 m/o), Enfield Correctional Institution, Enfield, CT • Inmates raise puppies from @americasvetdogs to become assistance dogs for disabled veterans • “It’s extremely rewarding and gives you a sense of responsibility to take care of someone besides yourself. It’s helped me socialize and communicate and has overall improved my life.” • “All of these guys come in here with a past. They have all done something that they get judged for, both in the real world and in here. But the dogs don’t care what you’ve done. This is probably the only relationship they’ll ever have where their past doesn’t matter. I can’t even imagine how rewarding that feels for these inmates.”

hi babes.

on wednesday night i had a couple of health scares that prompted me to go out of town to several different appointments all day thursday, and yesterday – friday – was spent taking blood tests and the like and way too much shit that i don’t want to get into, lol. basically this week was spent more in pain and a little bit of fear and panic, i won’t lie, so i wasn’t able to write as much as i wanted to. therefore, and i’m sure you all figured this out already, no chapter was uploaded friday.

i don’t get all of my test results back until wednesday, so for this weekend i’m going to try and keep my mind off everything worrying me and try to finish where i left off. i’m sorry i couldn’t deliver the chapter to you guys when i’d told you it might be up; sometimes life sucks, lol

i did try to write today (or, friday, it’s past midnight), but my head is not all here right now. still, those boys haven’t left me alone entirely, so some scenes have been written on my phone while out of town and whenever i felt the need to try and get away from reality for the moment. so there’s not many scenes left, but scenes are long in this fic, as you know, so there are several thousands of words. honestly, i promise you, i am going to try and push past the bad stuff this weekend to get this out to you asap – i’d really like to, anyway. real life is not somewhere i wanna station myself atm.

this is also why i have been in no contact w anyone via messenger or any other app. sorry, my head has not been in it at all this week. i love you all and i promise i’m going to get back to it. i just need to be either in the clear or just sure of things by wednesday and then maybe i’ll have more time to adapt to whatever situation’s being thrown at me.

today and tomorrow will hopefully be spent blasting music in my ears to drown out any thoughts that aren’t tmtts. i miss my boys, and trust me, i read your messages and your comments on the fic — i know you miss them, too. if i could just magically conjure up the rest of the fic in an hour for you guys, i would. i fucking love them so much. and i fucking love you guys so much.

trust me. it’s your support and your kindness that hasn’t allowed me to let this story go. were it nothing but petty entitlement — and i have encountered that in many other fandoms — i’d have probably shut it down already. but instead you guys are kind and patient and lovely, and that’s the kind of thing that keeps an author going and keeps an author wanting to give you more. so thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart.

because of your patience and your love and support, here are certain things i can tell you about the chapter to hold you over until hopefully after this weekend. i’ve put them under a read more, in case you don’t want to spoil yourself until the chapter is posted!

Keep reading

Cute past!Ardyn with his black chocobo *_*
I want to know more about Ardyn’s past life before he became evil guy…

7

[x] [x] [x] [x] [x] [x] - REQUESTED BY ANONYMOUS (sorry I missed out some of the Avengers !!)

Ex: Hello, y/n. Nice to see you again

Natasha: y/n… isn’t that-

Y/N: Oh god, what the hell are you doing here?

Natasha: You better back away from y/n, or I’ll get our God over here to beat the life out of you. *Thor and Natasha glare*

Clint: And I’ll have no trouble putting an arrow through your chest.

Ex: Look guys, no need to be mad-

Bruce: Oh, we’re way past that. I could choke the life out of you and never change a shade. 

Steve: Stay behind me, y/n, we’ve got this.

Tony: You’re a monster for what you did to y/n. You piece of shit-

Wanda: Why are we still talking? *turning to your ex, using her powers* I could blow you straight into the Earth’s core. 

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

Tease pt. 2 (M)

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader

Genre: angst, fluff and a little bit of smut

Word Count: 2,337

Summary: (33- “Bite me” “If you insist.”) Ever since you moved next door to Baekhyun, you have been the victim of his teasing and you had enough.

A/N: Hi, sorry everyone. I know I said I’d post sooner but I’ve been hella busy and I had really bad writer’s block. But here it is and I hope you enjoy!

Part 1, Part 2

Originally posted by sefuns


Part 2

He can’t see you the same anymore. Baekhyun can’t see you the same in class, when you walk by him with your friends, and now he can’t see you the same at Suho’s party. 

He didn’t expect to see you there. He thought you were so invested in your studies that you didn’t have time to go out, let alone go to a party. 

Ever since the day you humiliated him and left him with a hard on, he couldn’t look you in the eye. He hasn’t spoken to you and you haven’t spoken to him. 

You assumed he finally understood the annoyance and extremity of his teasing after you gave him a taste of his own medicine. But little did you know that he had other things in mind. 

Keep reading

dating theo raeken would include...

— hating each other before getting to know one another

•arguing until your voice is raw and your face is flushed with blood from every ounce of anger you’ve put into the argument with theo

•theo spitefully calling you “princess” when you argue

•"don’t you fucking call me princess, you fucking asshole!“

• him doing it anyways because the lil shit knows it pisses you off

— him beginning to like your personality

•he likes how you aren’t afraid to tell anybody what you’re thinking. it’s almost as if there is no filter between your brain and your mouth.

•he loves the way you argue with every ounce of your soul. he knows you’re stubborn and that even if you play unfairly, you’ll do it to win.

• but there’s a side of you he’s never gotten to encounter like some of the other pack members, you can be soft and kind and he loves that too.

—him starting to try and get closer to you

• “i know we haven’t been on the best terms since we met, but i’d like to at least try to be civil with each other.”

•you hesitate to agree but he’s got these pleading eyes that you can’t deny anything to.

•"we can make that arrangement. just try not to be such an asshole, raeken.“

—asking you out on a date after a week of getting to know you personally

•although not a very romantic person, he goes all out for you.

•you’re showered with a bouquet of red roses, and it has one white rose in the middle

•he’s the ultimate gentleman around you. opening doors, complimenting your everything, and it’s just really great.

•on this date, you both talk about a lot. he finds that you have a darker past than he originally thought, and that’s why you weren’t trusting of him first.

—stiles eventually finding out about this

•"you went out with, WHO?”

•"stiles, it’s really not a big deal, he’s actually a really great guy.“

•since stiles is like your overly protective older brother, he gives stiles ‘that’ talk.

•"theo, i’m not even fucking joking. if i hear a word come out of her mouth that has anything with you mistreating her, you will not live to see the next hour.”

—finding out about theo and the dread doctors

•"i cannot believe i trusted you. i trusted you, theo! i was warned, i was warned so many times, but i didn’t listen because you seemed like a decent guy!“

•"y/n, I am so, very very sorry.”

•"yeah fucking right. i cannot believe i let my guard down and let you into my life in the first place.“

—not talking to him for two weeks, until your forced to work by his side

•"y/n, please talk to me.”

•"theo, it’s been so hard, i have to literally have somebody take my phone away from me so i don’t call you. so i don’t look at all of our past messages or listen to those fucking voicemails.“

•"i feel it too, i feel that too.”

•"do you? did you feel that way when i left? even though you sit there and flirt with tracey and hayden? even though you sit there and act like nothing is wrong?“

•"i’m a fucking wreck y/n, please understand that.”

•"i am too, theo, but here’s something you don’t fucking understand. i fucking love you and i want to stay away no matter how much it reads me apart.“

—saving you from the dread doctors

•"i fucking told them not to touch you.”

•"theo? what are you doing here?“

•you don’t remember anything before the dread doctors found you, but all you can see if theo frantically untying straps that hold you down and a worried expression on his face. you’re in and out of sleep.

•"princess, i need you to stay awake.”

•"where’s scott?“

•theo visibly tenses when you say that

•"we can worry about that later, baby. let’s focus on saving you first.”

—waking up in the hospital bed with theo by your side, other pack members scattered around the room, and some down in the cafeteria.

•you immediately trying to rip the IV’s from your arm, you’re so frightened.

•theo suddenly jumps up and clasps your wrists in his hands

•"y/n, calm down.“

•you start to breathe normally and he lets go of your wrists.

•"i’m so sorry, i can’t even string together words to tell you how sorry i am. i love you so much, i never thought they would go as far as harming you.”

•"theo, shut the hell up, i have a headache, and these lights don’t help. let’s worry about this later.“

—having a long and deep conversation about everything

•"theo, don’t you dare fucking lie to me, not anymore. i told you this in the beginning, and you need to get this straight, i will not tolerate being lied to.”

•"i promise you, i will never lie to you again. i won’t keep anything from you, and you won’t ever have to worry about that again.“

•"theo, you need to tell me everything.”

•and theo does. every fine detail is just one more piece of his broken soul.

•"i have a fucked up past, but i love you.“

Busted and Blue Theory

Let me explain how Busted and Blue is about Noodle:

I first got the hint at the concert when the visuals throughout the whole song was phase four Noodle looking back at everything she had been through during the other phases. Then I went back and looked at the lyrics and put the pieces together.

Example:

“I was asked by a computer
A shadow on the wall
An image made by Virgil
To rule over us all
To amplify the sirens
And to find real amends
I’m through the echo-chambers
To other worlds away”

I believe this certain set of lyrics was written bc she finally remembered her past life as a child solider and remember everything those people had planned for her and those other children to do.

Example #2:

“Where do they come from?
The wires that connect to us
Weightless and fall on your body
‘Til we’re invisible
I’m with you throughout it, choose
Busted and blue”

Noodle is looking back on when she first joined Gorillaz and she’s questioning how such a miracle was about to happen. I mean think about it. Murdoc, a selfish jailbird that seemed to only be out for the fame, 2D, a half wit that acted like a zombie most of the time, and Russel, a traumatized guy from NY, took in a little Japanese girl that had no idea how to speak English and had no idea about anything in her past joined the band and made a family out of them. Without Noodle, they might not have been the family we’ve come to know and love.


Example #3:

“All my life
All my life
Beam a light on me
I am a satellite
And I can’t get back without you
Be my love
Be my love
Be my light
Be my light”

In the chorus Noodle’s taking about how she’s grown and can finally step back and see the sacrifices the band has made for her. She was always the little girl, the baby, but now it’s her turn to save them from their demons. Noodle isn’t their little baby girl anymore.


Theory created by @all-gorillaz-imagines

Destiel fic recs

I had some time and thought I should give it a try. These are my real favorites, I left out WiPs and the ones I haven’t finished reading. (If you want some more ideas, then here is my bookmark page for spn on AO3)   I’m sure there’s gonna be a few everyone has read, but I couldn’t leave them out.

<10 k

Clueless by ChocolateKid  
Five times Sam stayed oblivious and one time he didn’t.

A Different Kind of Magic by K_K_TiBal  
Castiel is a witch that prides himself on his healing spells and Dean is that one customer that keeps coming into his shop with a different illness that needs curing. 

A Thousand Words by K_K_TiBal 
Street artist AU

 Jacob’s Ladder by imogenbynight  
In which Dean develops a crush on a radio DJ who doesn’t know the first thing about the music he’s playing.

Unlit, Unmarked and Forgotten (Roads) by awed_frog 
“Where am I even supposed to go? After everything we survived together, I watched the man I love die. There’s no normal after that.” 11x17 coda

10 - 50 k

Unlikely Hero by Chancy_Lurking  
When Castiel calls Dean, after almost of decade of radio silence, for help after his daughter is kidnapped, it’s supposed to be a professional favor. But Dean’s life is never that simple and when old feelings get involved and stir up old demons, well… Why wouldn’t there be a little dose of Hell to top it all off?

like moses and batman and james dean by saltyfeathers 
Canon Divergence

Keep reading

Hey guys! This is Amiya and I’m leaving...

Hey guys! This is Amiya. I know this is very sudden, but Ive been thinking about this for a very long time now. I promise myself to post this once i reached 10k and it’s time…… I am officially closing “Jihanlife”. This includes mmeanielife, verkwanlife, and jicheollife…… 

I dont even know how to write this without getting emotional ahahahah. 

Being a part of this community is an eye opening experience. Unexceptionally. It gave me more than what ive asked for. All i wanted is a place to store jisoo and jeonghan photos. but then i met you guys and made alot amazing friends, supports, and love. OVERWHELMING LOVE. I was able to show my arts and edits and gain alot of skills through the process. Overtime the purpose of “jihanlife” had changed. It is now to spread the love and share out seventeen information to you guys. To make people learn more about seventeen and gather together as a fandom and i think my job is done here. I’ve complete my goals. Over this past 2 years, Im so glad to be able to make you guys happy. The best part of tumblr is that i can really connect with you guys like no other platform could. I love answer your question funny or serious. i love making shit post. i lovelovelove many thing about this place. it makes me feel warm and welcoming everyday. A year ago, i cant imagine leaving this place. “Jihanlife” mean so much to me…………

Now to the hard part….. as to “why im leaving…” 

The closing of jihanlife (tumblr) does not mean the ending of my love toward seventeen. Don’t worry. I’m not leaving seventeen or this fandom any time soon. I’ve been in this fandom since before they debut. I’m WAY to invested in seventeen. It’s too late to turn back now ahahah. Perhaps I even love them more that ever and will always do. But there are some reasons why i decided to leave…. and im gonna keep it very real.

1. I cant keep up with my blog. I cant work like i did before. My normal routine is to upload EVERY SINGLE PHOTOS of jisoo and jeonghan onto this blog EVERYDAY. and I run this blog alone. Once i missed a day. Its hard for me to go back and reupload it. Sometime it can take up to 6-8 hours per day. And thats just too much. I know i dont have to upload every single photos out there but its just my thing you know. and it starts to become a burden to me. Almost like task i need to complete. It starts to feel like work instead of hobby. I somehow pressure myself into it and i started to “hate” this blog. Someday it left my heart heavy and i want to get it off……. 

2. Unpleasant personal experiences with fansites. Ive been in the fandom for sometime now. For 3-4 years. I know things and experience things that are fairly unpleasant. Something most people dont know about and i wish you will never know.. ever. Since then, i dont feel the same. It’s hard to explain you directly but it is what it is. I really do wish i havent experienced those negative stuff but it hit me hard and yep life is life. Shit happened once in a while and its okay. i get it. i get over it. moved on. But little bit little, I lose that motivation, I gave them those “maybes”. The will to run this blog as energetic as before, its slowly disappearing. i highly respect fansites. I was one before (and pls dont dig up my history lol its ancient). It takes alot of time, money, effort, and passion. Since this blog is highly involved with fansites. I gave them credibility of their works, respect their works and understand their tricky circumstances that most people wont understand, but unfortunately Ive never recieve any form for mutual respect and instead an “unpleasant” experiences. Dont get me wrong, there are alot of good fansites out there. Ones that respect you as a human being. But Im just never lucky to met/known ones. It sucks. (At the end, you do you. Me do Me. Im good. No hard feelings <3 )

3. It’s time. You know when you do so many cooking to the point that you can just tell by instinct that your chicken is cooked. No? me neither. I dont cook lol. All jokes a side, i really mean it. I just feel it is the best time to leave it like this and move on.

4. I’m Confused. There are alot happening in my life right now and im confused. So I need to make the decision and cut something out. A huge sacrifice. Jihanlife is my life and i love it so much. Ive worked on it so so hard 24/7 for the past 2 years but we need to make that decision to move on. Maybe I just need a break. Sorry for not being able to do this anymore…. Im so sorry…..

5. I ate too many gummies bear. I ate too many gummies bear. I ran out. I need to buy a new jar. so i cant blog. (lol)

Im not gonna deactivate this blog (yet). Im gonna leave it like that because damn i worked on it everyday for the past 2 years for nothing ahahahh . If you guys want to check out old photos of Jihan. You can still swim in the archive! 

After I posted this in my blog, ill be here for the next 48 hrs before permanently leaving. So i can answer and talk to you guys <3 

Even though im leaving tumblr but you still can find me screaming about seventeen, retweeting Jihan photos, doing this same shit on

Twitter: https://twitter.com/jihanlife

Follow my personal life! You can stalk me on youtube and IG. I just started a youtube channel! Yes im moving from tumblr to youtube now ahhahha. I have alot planned ahead and it would be nice to have my friend here go along on a journey with me! <33 im not quite sure with the content yet but im trying! So Join the Journey to the wildness of random shit LOL! So stay tune!!! 

Youtube: Amy Choo

IG: gam.choo

It has been an amazing and precious experience. Truly. I hope you guys will keep continue loving seventeen and support them and yeah i hope you guys will do amazing…. as always. I will always be there for you even if im not in here anymore. Thank you for being so kind and caring to me. Thankyou for cheering me up when im down. Thankyou for adoring my work. Thankyou for being positive. Thank you for making this place a special place <3

This has been Amiya. Thank you for having me. Be kind, stay humble, believe unicorn and eat alot of cotton candy. I love you all.

Continue to spread the love.

Jihanlife (amiya)

it’s so fun to go from watching a phil liveshow which is basically ‘guys look at this new thing oh i saw this animal the other day and this happened also let’s talk about my clothes and fun things’ to dan’s liveshows which are ‘all of you shut up i’ve got something really–oh yeah also i need to talk about phil for a few minutes–anyway *gives great life advice* you’re all terrible and we’re all gonna die ily bye’

Treat you better

Summary: The reader finds comfort in unexpected arms when the past returns to the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. He realizes a little too late that he had lost her forever.

Warnings: Smoking (I don’t encourage this, it was just for dramatic effect), cursing, a bit sad. 

A/N: I changed just a bit the request because I wanted to make the reader a badass because she fucking deserved it, okay?? Hope you guys like it, and feedback this shit because I am a sucker for feedback <3


Originally posted by akamatthewmurdock

Originally posted by holybatlogic

“Matt, I don’t care what your current deal with her is—” she pointed at the slim brunette behind the sliding door that lead to the Devil’s bedroom—“but you have to know that I can’t keep this shit going on if you’re not gonna cooperate. A relationship is made by two, not just one.” She shook her head, trying to hold back the tears. “I’m done, Matt. I shouldn’t have believed you…”

“(Y/N), let me explain it—”

“No.” She smacked her lips. “I sure as hell don’t want any explanation of yours. Enough I have with you being the fucking Devil of Hell’s Kitchen; I don’t need to know why Elektra is back. All I need to know is that you’re turning into who you were in college and back then, this hurt like hell… I’m not gonna let it hurt again.”

“(Y/N), please…” Matt pleaded.

“Goodbye Matt, I hope you don’t get killed.” She took a deep breath and turned around for good.

It wasn’t until she was in the safety and privacy of her four walls that she allowed herself to break down. She sat on the hard-wooden floor trying to remember when Matt had started to act different and why she wasn’t able to stop this from happening. It was a cycle repeating, and it had one thing in common: Elektra Natchios.

Several hours later, (Y/N) carried her coffee, a pack of cigarettes, her lighter and a garden chair up to the rooftop of her building. She was not sure if she was allowed there, but she just needed a moment of peace and that was the only place she could think of. After arranging everything into place, she sat down and lit up the first cigar, and as she took the first, deep, drag, she also took a deep breath. She needed it, after all.

Steps behind her made her turn her head a little just to have a glance at who it could have been. She sighed and smiled lightly and took another drag. She took out her cigarettes and offered the just arrived man. He declined, wrinkling his nose and sitting on the cornice of the rooftop, beside her extended legs.

“Rough night, Castle?” She asked, looking at him from the corner of her eyes.

“I dare say less rough than yours, (Y/L/N),” he chuckled, “so… what’s with the tough look?” He nodded in her direction; truth was that with the mug of cold coffee in one hand, the cigarette on the other and the bad-ass sitting, she looked tougher than ever. Frank smiled lightly at the sight as he awaited for an answer.

“I just had a terrible day.” She replied shorty.

“At work?”

She scoffed and rolled her eyes in exhaustion. “At life.” She sighed heavily and sipped the remaining of the cold coffee. “It seems like the past insists in following me around today.”

“Wanna talk about that, pal?”

“You know I had a boyfriend, right?” Frank nodded silently. “Well, Matt and I met back in the day, when we were in Columbia studying and all that crap, and boy he was a good guy. Like a saint kinda guy, but a woman appeared in the way. Her name is Elektra Natchios and… It all went to shit because she not only distracted him from… me,” she took a deep breath, “but she also made him distracted from his studies and everything. Long story short, she’s back in town and today I found them at his place and… she had not changed a thing, and unfortunately Matt has gone back to who he used to be with her.”

“So you hate this Elektra gal?” Frank asked.

“You could think so, yeah, but… truth is I don’t. I just hate what she has done to Matt, and what she does to him. He seems to be under some…” she twisted her lips, trying to think of the right word to describe her thoughts, “some kind of spell. I mean, bitch is gorgeous I swear to god. Like, tall and super skinny. She looks like a freaking model, but again, it’s not her who I’m mad at.”

“Did you find them going at it?” Frank cocked an eyebrow.

“God, no!” She squealed and winced in disgust. “They looked like they were injured, and… well, Elektra was wearing one of Matt’s shirts, that of course, totally suited her, but the shirt she had on was one I gave Matt for his birthday.” (Y/N) bit her bottom lip. Frank had never listened so carefully and he never seemed very interested about her relationship with the lawyer, but that night it all changed and she was taking the opportunity to let it all out. “I mean, he didn’t even have the fucking decency of giving her other shirt. Why did it have to be my shirt? I don’t want it back but—”

Out of a sudden, both (Y/N) and Frank were startled by the Daredevil himself.

“(Y/N) get away from him, he’s dangerous.” The man in the red suit warned, quickly getting to her to try to keep her away from the Punisher. Matt could be very protective and possessive when he felt like (Y/N) was in possible danger, but now it was too late for him to play hero and try to protect her.

“Get your hands off of her, Red.” Frank threatened, dropping his gun on the rooftop. “I am not afraid of beating the shit out of you.”

“Frank, no!” (Y/N) squealed, running towards him and placing her palms on his chest, trying to sooth him. “There’s no need for that…”

Matt was taken aback by the smooth relationship between them, and by Frank’s erratic heartbeat, he knew immediately that his feelings for (Y/N) were as strong as his own. Matt was decided in not letting (Y/N) go, but deep inside, he knew it could be a bit too late for that.

“Why don’t you tell him exactly what you were telling me?” Frank encouraged (Y/N) by nodding at her. He knew how strong she could be and he never doubted her. She just needed a little push.

“(Y/N)?” Matt asked, expecting the worst from her. He deserved it, after all.

“You’re an asshole, Matt.” She started. “You’re a dick. I mean, why? Why pretending all this time? Why the lies? Why did it have to be just like college?” She asked. “I mean, haven’t you learnt your goddamned lesson? Are you that much of an idiot?” She felt her voice increasing its volume and her chest expanding with every air intake. “Seriously, Elektra comes again, and you fall into her trap again!” She was exasperated and thanks to Frank’s little push, she felt empowered and invincible. Things were different now from her college years and she was not afraid of speaking up. The career in law had toughened her up. “And what’s worst, you’re not only lying to me.” She pointed at herself. “Think about Foggy for once in your life, would you? Think about how you’re turning the business you had together into shit. Everything you’ve worked for, you’re really gonna blow it up because of her? And don’t come with that ninja shit you’ve been rambling about, I don’t need and I don’t want that explanation.” She shook her head lightly. “I’m not that heartbroken Matt,” she said after a pause, her voice had softened and her bottom lip had started to tremble, “I’m just… tired and I’m hurt because this is like college all over again and I thought we were all over that.”

“Tell him about the shirt.” Frank coughed.

“Oh yes!” She snapped her fingers, regaining her confidence back. “Because how do you think I felt when I saw Elektra wearing the shirt I gave you for your birthday? I mean, not only she was rocking it, but it was all bloody and shit. Like, couldn’t you have at least a bit of decency and respect for me by giving her another thing to wear? Jesus, Matt, you’re a piece of shit.”

“I know, and—”

“No Matt, you don’t know shit.” She interrupted. “If you knew something, you’d treat me a bit better. You know, I’ve known Frank for a while now and as surprising as it can be, he listened to me rambling about you, because you know what? He treats me well, and he cares about me. And a lot. I don’t recognize you anymore, Matt…” her voice broke, “and what’s worse… I don’t think I ever did. Just… leave, Matt. I don’t want to see you ever again.”

“Are you saying Frank Castle is better than me?”

“You heard the lady, man.” Frank stepped closer to Matt, ready for the previously announced fist fight. “Leave.”

“I’m talking to her, not you.” Matt took another step closer to the Punisher. “You don’t know her like I do.”

“Apparently I know her better, because guess who has been picking up her pieces that I’m guessing you left today.” Frank teased.

“You’re doing this because you like her and you wanna get to her. I’m not an idiot, Castle.”

“I strongly disagree.” The alluded shrugged carelessly. “Leave before I make you leave in pieces.”

“(Y/N), answer me.” Matt pleaded one last time. “Is Frank Castle better than me?”

“You could say so, yes.” (Y/N) nodded. “Now leave, for real, I don’t want to see you ever again or hear from you, I just want you out of my life.” The tears pooled in her glimmery eyes and just before she broke down, Frank’s huge arm rested around her back, giving her a sense of safety and support. “You can keep all the things I gave you, or better, give them to Elektra, I’m sure she’ll enjoy them.” She bitterly spat.

“Let’s get you inside.” Frank softly said, placing a hand on the small of her back. “Red, get outta here.” His voice turned from soft into a growl. Matt licked his lips and nervously and had no other choice but leaving. (Y/N) was right, he was a piece of shit and he realized that exact same minute that the one thing that kept him on the normal side was her and that he had lost her forever. She didn’t even see him leave.

Once they were inside, Frank put some water to boil and (Y/N) went to her bedroom to change into something more comfortable. This was the second time she broke up with Matt, and it hurt as much as the first time did. She stayed in her bedroom, crying almost naked for everything that had happened. It hurt her seeing how little he had learnt and how little he cared about what they had. It was incredible how Elektra could change him, just flicking a switch on him.

“(Y/N)?” Frank knocked on her door, startling her and making her dress up quickly. “I made you some tea, I’ll be waiting for you in the living room…”

“Thank you, Frank.” She stammered.

When she got out, she discovered Frank smiling slightly at her and holding the cup in one of his huge hands. She took it gladly, and took a sip from it. She muttered a ‘thank you’ and wrapped one of her arms around his wide torso. She tried to keep herself together, but truth be told, she couldn’t. Fortunately, Frank was there to keep her broken pieces from falling away. His arms were like glue to her breaking heart.

“I know you like me, Frank…” she whispered, “I’m not an idiot.” Frank chuckled and nodded.

“Yeah, not like I’ve been trying to hide it…” He admitted.

“But why listening all my blabbering about Matt?” She looked up to him. “I mean, I was hurting you and you never stopped me, and I’m sorry for not sto—”

“You were not hurting me, (Y/N).” Frank laughed heartedly. “I mean, it wasn’t my favorite topic to discuss, but…” He shrugged. Out of a sudden, he lets go of (Y/N) and goes away to sit on the couch. He tapped on the spot next to him and she took the invitation. “I like you, ok? I like you a lot,” he nodded at her, “but I do have a ridiculously elevated amount of respect for you, so I’m not gonna push’ya into something you don’t want. I might be a nutjob, but I understand the meaning of limits.”

“Frank Castle has feelings, after all.” (Y/N) smiled lightly and leaned her head on his shoulder. “Thank you.” She sighed after a long silence. “Just thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.” Frank lovingly kissed the top of her head and leaned his big head on hers.

anonymous asked:

No idea how full your inbox is, but if you still be accepting may I request an older! Noct fluff piece where female s/o is spending time with him in the gardens, talking about what the future may bring and then she just says something along the lines of 'I might be pregnant'? It can be with 20 yr old Noct if that's easier though, I would hate it if you were giving yourself a headache over it. If you don't fill it out, I completely understand. - Kind regards, Kim (sign off was real formal)

A.N: OLDER NOCT IS FINE! FLUFF IS EXTRA FINE! <3 I hope a short drabble will suffice dearie? :D Also I drifted a little from the original prompt- my muse doesn’t know how to stick to the script *sweatdrops*!

Tagging some pals: @blindbae, @alicemoonwonderland, @itshaejinju, @cupnoodle-queen, @nifwrites, @stunninglyignis, @rubyphilomela, @dirtyffxvconfession, @louisvuittontrashbags, @chocobruh-art, @ridingchocobros, @neko-otaku13, @hypaalicious and @fieryfantasy <3333


Puppies and Tiny Tots (Older!Noctis x Fem!Reader SFW)

When Noctis emerged from the rubble of the Citadel as the sun rose, you had thought you were dreaming. He wasn’t supposed to have survived his final trial. He was supposed to have lost his life for the light. He was supposed to have been a sacrificial lamb- everyone had been saying it.

Tomorrow was never supposed to have come for Noctis Lucis Caelum.

Keep reading

Castration Anxiety

“For kali!”
I couldn’t count how many of them there were. The smoke obscured their exact numbers, but the amazons must have numbered in the hundred. I was tied, spread-eagle and naked, to two massive pieces of lumber.

One approached me. She was clearly some kind of leader, by how the others cheered as she stepped forward. She wore nothing but a smile. She was fit as hell, with toned abs connecting her unshaven pussy to her huge, swinging breasts. God, she was hot. I hoped Kali, whoever she was, needed a fertile male to impregnate their leader for another generation.

“For years, Kali has been angry at our lack of male sacrifice. But finally, one comes to us!”

Sacrifice? What the hell is-

OOF

My thoughts fell out of me with my wind, as a huge knee connected with my unprotected nuts. Pain exploded through me, as cheers exploded through the crowd. Had I had control of all of my limbs, I would be on the ground, dryheaving and holding my bruised sac.

“Tonight, we give her what she wants! Tonight, we make one less male in the world”

Oh god, were they going to kill me? I struggled against the vines holding me, but got nowhere.

SPLAT

Her fist connected with my left nut. More nutpain swelled up inside of me, starting at the base of my sac and working its way through my body. I just wanted it to end.

Splat! Splat! Splat!

3 more punches. It seemed like more were joining in the free for all ballbusting, but I sure as hell couldn’t tell. The only thing I could think about was the gut-wrenching pain emanating from my manhood.

THUD

A stomp connected. Somehow I was laying down. What was happening? I was still tied to the wooden X.

“I hope you enjoyed your time among the weaker sex.”

Who said that?
SSSSPLAT

I recognized the sound before I felt the pain. Just before my world exploded in pain, I realized the last stomp had ruptured my left testicle. I felt its remains swishing around in my sac, as feminine hands palpated it, breaking any chunks the stomp may have left intact. If there had been any chance of repair, they were demolishing it.

They were breaking my balls.

“Kali has taken half of his lifeforce! Let us relinquish the rest!”

I don’t know how many more kicks, punches, stomps, and heels followed that one. My right nut had always been a little bigger than my left, so I guess it makes sense that it lasted longer.

Splat!

Of course, my head couldn’t comprehend any of these thoughts.

Crunch!
-
Only one thing occupied my barely conscious mind

Splat!

The fact that a group of amazons, naked and hotter than any woman I’ve ever seen

Squish!

Were going to turn me into a eunuch.

SPPLAT!

And there goes righty.

————————————————–

I woke up drenched in sweat. My alarm read 3:34. I had work in 4 hours, but there was no way I was going back to sleep. I swear, I could still feel the bruises from the nightmare.

————————————————–

I hadn’t really needed a therapist before. I started going to Karen shortly after my divorce, mostly because I needed a pretty face to look at once a week. She had raven black hair, and perky, petite breasts. Her legs went from the floor all the way up to her perfect, toned bubble butt. Lying on her couch, I could usually look up her unprofessionally short miniskirt, and caught a few glimpses of her panties once or twice. In short, she provided an expensive, classy, personal striptease. Not that she knew it, of course. I usually made up some bullshit issue about my parents or childhood or something. Nothing too embarrassing, just convincing enough that I would get a sympathy hug or something.

I certainly didn’t want to tell her that I’d been dreaming about girls removing my testicles in a variety of ways for the past few weeks. I still held out hope she would sleep with me at some point, and no girl wants to fuck a guy with those types of problems. But this had seriously started to interfere with my personal life.

“Anything in particular you want to talk about this week, Jeremy?”

How do I start…

“Karen, what do you know about dreams?”

She giggled, her breasts bouncing wonderfully. I don’t think I’ve ever managed to return from once of these sessions without immediately jerking off.

“Dreams are more significant than most people realize. They can symbolize desires, fears, anxieties, hidden deep within your subconscious. Have you been having some strange ones?”

I was planning on toning down the severity of my dreams. I figured just telling her I was getting beaten up by women was good enough. But as I looked into those almond-brown eyes, I realized I couldn’t possibly lie to her. Maybe she won’t sleep with me, but I need to stop these fucking nightmares.

I told her about the amazons, cheerleaders, nurses, teachers, swim instructors, dominatrices, businessladies, and random women on the street who have been castrating me for weeks. I told her about the vicious ball popping, and how none had been kind enough to leave a solid chunk of manhood floating around in my nocturnally abused sac. I spared no detail, and as I elaborated my surprisingly intricate recollections of these terrors, she seemed to enjoy it.

Maybe enjoy is the wrong term. She just wasn’t giving me the dry heaves and disgusted looks I expected one to give upon hearing story after story about a guy losing his most valued organs in the most painful ways. In fact, a wry smile was forming on her lips, as if she enjoyed hearing my pain. After I finished, she delivered her diagnosis.

“Your case is not as uncommon as you might think. Freud called it ‘castration anxiety’, for obvious reason. There have been numerous studies into treatment, and luckily for you, I did my PhD in this very specific subfield!”

Ah, so she wasn’t some kind of sadist. This stuff was just familiar to her. Relieving, although I wondered what kind of person would voluntarily specialize in hearing first-hand accounts of vicious castration.

“Your case sounds particularly severe, but I’m sure I can help you out. Castration anxiety comes from an internal fear of the feminine …”

She prattled on and on about ids and egos and whatnot. As hot as she was, Karen was no slouch intellectually. Not that I cared; I’d bang the brains out of any girl with an ass like hers. As she went on, I caught a glimpse of her skirt, and felt blood rush to my nether regions.

“So, are you ready? We can start right now!”

“What?”
“I’m going to need you to get completely naked, to start.”

WHOA. In any other case, I might have asked a few questions about what I had just missed, but I knew a come on when I heard one. I practically jumped out of my clothes, and sat on her couch bare-ass naked, awaiting her “treatment”.

She giggled again. “Wow, so eager. Most guys aren’t excited when they hear what’s necessary to cure a severe castration anxiety disorder. I probably won’t even have to tie you down.”

Wait, wha-

CRUNCH

Before I could react, her kneecap connected with my all-too-real nuts. No nightmare. This was real.

SPLAT

A second knee. It’s incredible how much more conscious ballbusting hurts than its unconscious counterpart. Nothing any Amazon ever did to me in my sleep compared to this.

“Like I was saying, I’m not going to castrate you or do any permanent damage of course.”

Well that’s a relief. If only it matched the treatment she was delivering to my nuts. I tried to beg her to stop, or roll out of the way, or do something to prevent another ball-exploding impact, but before I could, her balled up fist connect squarely with the center of my left testicle, jabbing it into my pelvic bone, and releasing an agony I couldn’t describe if I wanted to.

“The purpose of this strategically-applied testicular pain is to make you realize that females can’t castrate you as easily as your subconscious mind thinks. Your balls can take quite a beating, you see.”

I realize she wasn’t drawing back for another hit, and let out a sigh of relief. Then I realized that was because her hand was already firmly on my sac, squeezing the shit out of it. My balls bulged between her fingers, and my eyes bulged out of my head. Her fingernails were digging into the sensitive tissue in the back of my manhood. How could this possibly be helpful to my mental health?

“In college, less than 20% of the males I tried this treatment on suffered a ruptured testicle! And nearly 98% came out with at least one testicle intact! Since you only really need one testicle to do anything with, I can guarantee you’ll be fertile after I’m done with you.”

Through the haze of pain, I could barely comprehend her words.

“Now, for the rapid testicle compressions.”

She wrapped each of her petite hands around one of my testicles, and leaned forward. I could see down her blouse, to the soft, tender breasts housed within. I could imagine a slightly different scenario, with her being the one completely naked, under my control. Rubbing my rock-hard cock against those puppies….

“Oop! That’s not an unusually reaction, nothing to be embarassed about.”

I realized my rock-hard cock was no fantasy. Even though my mind was in incomprehensible pain, some part had managed to realize that a beautiful woman was touching my most sensitive parts.

She stared for a while at my member, a small smile growing on her lips. I hoped it was in admiration, but I knew better. I had never been a particularly “big” guy, with my biggest hard-on coming in generously at 5.5 inches. At least she was professional about it.

“Here we go!”

Her hands rhythmically compressed and uncompressed my nuts. Her nails were like daggers, scratching the tender meat that housed my surely damaged genetic material. How could this not leave permanent damage?

But my eggs were too scrambled for me to voice any of these concerns. I kept staring down her chest, futilely hoping to counteract the pain from my junk with some pleasure. My cock remained marble-hard.

“Aaaand that should be it for today. You can get dressed now. Next week, we’ll try to take it a little further. Remember, you won’t be fully cured until you’re not scared of testicular damage, no matter what kind of abuse you take!”

I tucked my tender balls into my pants. I’m not the kind of guy who wears tight jeans, so I knew my balls had swollen considerably when I couldn’t fit them into my pants without a painful squeeze. As I dressed, Karen watched me, a grin from ear to ear. I guess she must have been proud of herself for her work.

“Oh! One more thing, I almost forgot. You can’t complete your treatment without these!”

She pulled out a small bottle of blue pills and handed them to me. I almost questioned her ability to prescribe medicine as a therapist, but I was too pain-addled to question anything.

“One per day, before you sleep. See you next week!”

That night, I went my first night without any nightmares. Of course, I hardly slept at all, as my huge, black and blue nuts kept me from passing out for more than half an hour without jolting me awake, screaming and clutching my wounded manhood.

The week passed uneventfully. My nuts began to shrink back to their normal size, and I almost was able to walk in a normal manner. I managed to go to work without anyone noticing my malady, so I thought. And, until Tuesday night, I thought I was cured. No nightmares at all!
—————————-

GOOOOOOAAAAAAL

A soccer ball whizzed by my head. A cry of disappointment came from my teammates. As I surveyed the field, I realized I was the only male there. Strange.

“You can’t fucking do anything right! I knew choosing a boy for a goalie was a bad idea!”

Some girl (on my team apparently) was bitching at me about my inability to be a team player or some shit. At least she couldn’t see my eyes behind this goalie mask, as they were firmly fixed on her massive tits. I couldn’t believe she wasn’t wearing a sports bra. Those things were seriously the size of soccer balls themselves.

“Are you even fucking listening to me?”

Ugh, what is she eve-

SLAM

A cleated heel connected with my ballsac. Why didn’t I get a cup as a goalie?

As I fell to the ground, she lifted my legs up and spread them. I tried to resist, but I couldn’t, somehow.

Her foot rested on my busted balls, the tips of her cleats digging into my nuts. A smile curled on her face.

“Maybe these are distracting you. You really think me and the other girls can’t see you ogling us behind your mask? You’re a goalie. You are supposed to block balls, not have them.”

Oh shit.

Her weight shifted, and suddenly her cleats were not gently resting on top of my manhood. They were digging in, crushing my only chance at children.

“This won’t take long, and as soon as I’m done with these, we can get back to the game.”

She giggled. Why weren’t the refs stepping in? I felt my sac splitting where her cleats dug in.

Suddenly, just as I was sure my manhood was going to explode into a familiar sac of goo, she stepped off and bent down. If I were smart, I would have bolted off then. But of course, like an idiot, I sat there and waited for her next move.

She ripped my gear off with unbelievable ease, leaving my mangled nuts and dick uncovered for all to see. When she saw what my manhood had to offer, she broke into a laugh.

“I know some guys are growers, not showers, but that is the most pathetic dick I’ve ever seen! At least you won’t miss getting laid when I finish crushing these.”

I begged her to stop, but it was as pointless as begging the tide to come back in.

She stepped onto my nuts, grinding them into the muddy field. Pain exploded through me.

“Why are you even on a team if you can’t fucking play soccer? Honestly, losing these makes you fit in with team dynamic so much better.”

I looked up her leg. Through her shorts, I saw that she wasn’t wearing underwear. What kind of girl plays soccer commando? In fact, I realized she was completely naked. Had I had an ounce of mental comprehension at this point, this would have tipped me off that I was in a dream.

I stared up at her well-shaven bush, hiding a cute, tight pussy. Those massive DD’s swung ominously, like bells tolling for the end of my manhood. My dick was at its full 4.5 inches (what?! What happened to the last inch? How could I even measure my dick this accurately? Fuck I can’t think about this I’m getting castrated).

“Good. Keep that little thing out of my way. I’ll take care of it after I’m done with your nuts.”

SPLUT! SPLUT!

A last wave of nausea spread through me, and I knew it was done. The spikes on her shoes met with the mud on the other side of my sac. My two balls were now many chunks, and as she ground her heel into my mess of a scrotum, I felt them transform into a fine mush. The all-female crowd cheered.

My cock stayed rock hard the whole time.

————-

I woke up, in the usual sweat. This dream was so real, I could swear I actually could feel bruises on my nuts. Then I realized, I hadn’t finished healing after last week’s “session” with Karen. I squeezed my sac, making sure they were simply bruised and not broken. Surprisingly, my erection hadn’t been part of the dream. It was as hard as it had been during therapy. I realized I hadn’t masturbated since then, due to the pain. I started stroking gently, thinking about the soccer girl’s knockers. But something felt off. It felt…different.

I went to the bathroom and took a look. There was no way this was my imagination. My dick had shrank! I rushed to my desk and grabbed a ruler.

4.5 inches. My dream was right. I needed to go back to Karen and ask what the fuck was happening. Surely this couldn’t be unrelated to the castration anxiety.

———-

“So, any dreams this week?”
I laid on her couch again, naked as the day I was born. This time, she had me strip as soon as I came in. Something about familiarizing my body with a feminine space or some psychobabble.

I noticed this week there were some kind of leather straps attached to the bottom and sides of the couch. I could only imagine what fresh hell she had in store for me.

“Just one, yesterday. Soccer girl with cleats.”

She shook her head. “That doesn’t sound so fun. Did she leave anything in there this time, or was it another total castration?”
“Not a thing.”

She shook her head. “Were you aroused this time?”

I nodded my head slowly. How could she possibly have known that?

“I understand if you’re embarrassed. It’s a common side effect of the pills I gave you. In addition to the reduction in the frequency of the dreams, they make them more…pleasurable.”

Oh yeah. Maybe those damn pills were to blame for my smaller dick.

“Did those pills have any…other side effects?”

Her gaze shifted down to my shrunken cock. Soft at the moment, it barely stood out; I could practically feel it retract farther into me as she stared at it knowingly.

“I assume you’ve been experiencing some… shrinkage?”

I couldn’t bring myself to respond. The humiliation was too great.

“Rest assured, it’s purely temporary. In fact, there have been some reports that males can gain permanent growth after the treatment is complete, up to 1.5 inches above the original size.”

Hot damn! A whole inch and a half? I can’t wait to finish this therapy business.

She must have noticed my reaction. “I figured you’d be pleased. Normally, I don’t prescribe them due to…other issues, but I figured you need all the help you can get in that department.”

I couldn’t believe how blunt she was being. She noticed my offense and quickly changed her tune.

“I mean, from a purely medical standpoint of course. I’m sure the women you sleep with are very satisfied.”

I know she was trying to be professional, but it would have been nice if she had kept from smiling entirely on that last part.

“Anyway, you’re penis isn’t what’s giving us trouble here. We’ve got to focus on your balls again. I’m going to have to strap you in for today’s procedure.”

Before I could protest, she secured the leather straps around my ankles and wrists. I was spread apart, my swollen sack cushioning my shriveled dick, the whole package resting on the cool leather of the couch.

“Today, I figured I’d try making it a little more real.”

“How much realer can it get than jamming your fingers halfway through my nuts?!”

She looked down at me sternly. “You men always exaggerate. I was barely touching them. Anyway, I got my farmhand friend to lend me a little…equipment this week.”

She brought out a massive, metal tool. I would call them pliers, but the end was too broad. I hadn’t been on a farm, but I recognized a castration tool when I saw one. She was going to do it for real. I was going to lose my nuts! I started struggling, trying to get away from this crazy bitch.

“Now now, those restraints aren’t going anywhere. And like I said, I’m not cutting your nuts off for real! You really need to separate fantasy from reality here.”

“In order to show you how fantastical a castration really is, I’m going to get as close to castrating you as possible. I will include verbal enhancement and pressure from the burdizzo, as well as the same testicular pressures and impacts from last week, although with a greater intensity and frequency.”

Not a single word of that sounded remotely pleasant.

“Oh, one last thing.”

She pulled out a ballgag and gagged me. “I know you know this is fake, but you may feel some mild terror at times. Try to keep calm; this will keep you quiet.”

She smiled wickedly. “Now, are you ready for me to cut your balls off?”

She positioned the burdizzo around the top of my sac, squeezing gently enough not to crush anything, but hard enough that I could feel the circulation running out of my nuts.

“Feel those little strings attaching your nuts to your body? Those are called your spermatic cords. The burdizzo is meant to snip them right off. This would be the first time you’re castrated without having your balls converted to a mushy soup first.”

She laughed. “Of course, that’s assuming I DON”T convert them to soup.”

She let go of the horrible thing with one of her hands, and swung her first hard into my nuts. She left the burdizzo clamped around my balls, so they had nowhere to go but into it. I felt them flatten against the hard metal, and then the pain hit me. Tears welled up, and I realized her fist hadn’t left my sac. She was driving it deeper and deeper into my nuts.

Usually, I kept my eyes glued on her chest and ass during therapy. So I guess I never noticed the large, pointy ring on her left ring finger.
I noticed now.

I screamed as loud as I could into the gag. There is no way she was faking this. This was not “Verbal enhancement”. I was not walking out of here the same gender I came in.

Just before I was sure the ring was going to punch through my right nut, she removed her hand. I could feel the indent left on the bottom side of my sac.

“Maybe you deserve a little treat before you lose these little boys forever.”

She smiled that smile again.

“And I do mean little. How often do you get laid anyway? I’m surprised none of the girls you’ve slept with have crushed your tiny balls just for trying to stick your dick in them.”

“But anyway, looks like your sac is pretty full. Maybe I could empty it before I ruin it?”

Was this still part of the roleplay? What the hell was going on? What did this have to do with my nightmares?

Before I could answer, I turned my head over to see the most beautiful sight I’d ever seen. Karen had taken her shirt off, and was in the process of removing her bra.

She saw the look on my face, and looked down at my rock-hard cock. “I assume you haven’t been able to masturbate all week after the beating from last Wednesday. Hopefully that means this will go quick. This is just a final orgasm, nothing more. We’re not doing this for your pleasure, after all. It just makes castration easier.”

“That doesn’t mean you have nothing to look forward to, of course. My ex did say I gave fantastic blowjobs.”

Oh my god oh my god. I don’t care if this was for roleplay or whatever, this was the hottest thing that had ever happened to me. She was right about my sex life; my dick may not have been ultra tiny, but I sure as hell wasn’t any good with it.

And it didn’t help that I couldn’t last very…
Last very long in…uh…

Oh god….

Cum sprayed everywhere, before Karen even finished taking off her bra. My dick shot its huge, week-long backlog. The couch, burdizzo, and my chest were covered in my spunk.
Maybe that was it. Maybe the therapy was just making me cum, and we’re done now. I looked at her, hopeful that she would remove the tool constricting my manhood.

Then I saw her face.

“Well, that makes my job easier. At least you managed to miss me.”
She smiled.

“And I would have swallowed to.”

My cock managed a final spurt, hitting the one spot on my belly not covered in manjuice.

“I hope you enjoyed that at much as I enjoyed avoiding it. Say goodbye to your precious balls now.”
She stood up, strapping her bra on before I even got a glimpse of nipple. The burdizzo clamped down again, this time harder than before. I could feel my cords being crushed. My mind screamed in pain as my manhood swelled up.

She stood over me, her high heel pinning my right nut down. High heel?! What kind of therapist wears those?

“I see you’ve taken an interest in my heels. Wore them just for you. How else am I supposed to puncture through the strong Tunica albuginea?”
What the hell was she saying? Was that Latin? It didn’t matter.
The pressure on my nut increased. Had I been more lucid, I would have noticed that the tip of her heel coincided with the indentation left by her ring. I would have figured out that, although my nut could withstand either of those forces, there is no way it could have taken them in rapid succession in the same spot. Unfortunately, I didn’t manage to figure that out before she put all her weight onto the testicle.
Even more unfortunately, neither did she.
In my dreams, ruptured testicles happened instantaneously. One minute I was a man, and the next minute only half of one. As her heel skewered my nut, I realized how long a real rupture takes. I could feel the tip going all the way through my poor testicle, and coming out the other side. I saw the expression on her face change from malice to surprise as she realized what she had done.

“OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! THAT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!”

Her mouth formed the perfect “O” in surprise, the same O that had been promised for the most heavenly blowjob. She unstrapped me and removed the ballgag for my mouth, before pulling her phone out and rapidly dialing 911.

In all the pain and terror, I hardly noticed the burdizzo was still clamped around my nuts. I guess there must be some sort of lock or something. Why would someone invent such a cruel device? I feebly batted at it, in an attempt to remove it before my last nut died.

My last nut. That’s all I have now. Just one. Maybe the doctors could fix righty? But even before I thought it, I knew it to be a lie.

Karen saw what I was doing and unhooked the burdizzo. Blood flowed through my crushed right cord, filling up my sac. I lay on the ground, clutching my good ball and the remains of the other.

Karen looked down at me. The shock and horror was gone from her face, and she looked strangely calm, albeit puzzled. “Crushing your ball was supposed to knock you out instantly..,”

A kick connected with my ruined ball. I guess it hadn’t been entirely soup before, because I felt its remains disintegrate in front of her high heel.

Finally, unconsciousness took me.

————
I awoke in a hospital bed. A cute Asian nurse walked in, and a smile broke out on her face as she saw me gain consciousness.

“Look who finally woke up. Do you know the details of your injury yet?”

I tried thinking back…I remember being tied down, a false promise of a blowjob, a ruined opportunity…then, nothing.

“I can’t remember anything. Last I remember was going to a therapy session with Karen…Did she bruise my nuts? What happened?”

The nurse giggled. I’ve never seen an Asian with a rack like that. Her neckline was strangely low too, like she had unbuttoned it on purpose. I could see the top of some massive cleavage peeking out, teasing me. My dick managed a chubby. I took that as a good sign.

“Your remaining testicle is certainly bruised. The right one was crushed completely. We’ve finished removing it and the spermatic cords.”

Oh god…

“You’re still technically a man, but you should be more careful with your remaining nut. Were it to break, you would no longer be able to father children.”

“In addition, with the loss of a testicle, your testosterone production has decreased.”

The smile returned. “What that means is you may find a reduction of size in certain…key regions.”

She didn’t need to elaborate. My dick was getting even smaller. I just hoped the gain from the pills would counteract it.

“Now, let’s see if you can manage an erection for me.”

Without so much as asking my permission, she lifted my hospital gown up and bent over to look at my junk. I could now see down her whole uniform, and her breasts were even more amazing than I imagined. My dick went rock hard.

Then she asked the worst question any man could hear.

“Is..,it fully erect yet?”

I nearly died of embarrassment. Glancing down, I realized I had shrank even more in the short time since my therapy.

“…yes.”

She giggled. “I see.”

She marked something down on her clipboard and walked off, leaving the door open and my half-empty sac exposed to anyone walking down the hall.

A short time later, Karen came to visit. She brought a bouquet.

“I’m SOOOOOOO sorry! Can you ever forgive me?”

She sat down on the chair next to my bed, her breasts tantalizingly exposed.

“No man deserves what happened to you. I’ll make sure you get the very best treatment from now on.”

Despite the circumstances, my cock went rock-hard. She didn’t fail to notice, and gave me a playful smile.

“You know, during the session, I wasn’t lying about the blowjob. Orgasms given by females can help reduce a male’s castration anxiety. I would have really given you one.”

She sighed. “Of course, circumstances prevented it…But who’s to say I can’t make up the favor now?”

In my private moments, I had often thought about how much I would give for a blowjob from Karen. Never had I imagined I would literally give my right nut.

“Let’s get a little privacy, shall we?” She closed the door quietly.

My cock was so rock-hard, it felt like it had gained back a bit of what it had lost. As she bent over to reach my cock, I felt shivers run down my back. Whoever her ex was, he sure was a lucky man. My now-shrunk dick did have one upside: any girl could deep throat me with ease.

With the week’s worth of cum drained, I managed to last a little longer this time. But before too long, I felt that familiar rising, deep within my remaining nut. I was going to cum… oh god….

Footsteps came from down the hall. Karen shot off my dick, a millisecond too soon. The door opened, and the nurse from before was greeted my rock-hard, angry purple, still moist dick, standing a solid 4” above my solitary, deep blue ball.

“You’re free to go, Jeremy. I suggest wearing a cup for the next few weeks, as your left testicle is still fairly bruised and subject to rupture. In addition, please try to refrain from orgasm if possible. A buildup of semen can stimulate the production of testosterone.”

She smiled at my meager manhood. “And you’re really going to need as much of that as you can get.”

I had never been this close to orgasm before for so long. That single smile, and her jutting, soft breasts, were just enough to set me off. I erupted everywhere, my second ruined orgasm. The nurse smiled viciously as I covered myself with milky semen, while Karen looked on in horror.

The nurse waited until I finished to continue talking. “I’ll take care of this mess. Please try to be careful.” She grabbed my solitary ball, rolling it around in the palm of her hand. “Let’s just make one last check for ruptures.” Her small finger prodded into the back and top of my ball, and I grimaced as she found the bruises Karen had left. “We wouldn’t want you losing this one as well.” She let go of it with an unnecessarily vicious yank downwards, and it felt like it was being ripped out by its roots.

“It’s all you have left.”

——–

“No! Aim lower!”

The fencing coach was guiding my opponent, a girl several years my junior. The score was 4-0, my favor, and she clearly needed some help. I didn’t bother listening because I figured I would get the last point with the same ease I scored the first 4.

“En guarde. Ready, Fence!”

She lunged towards me. I parried across, but her blade went lower than usual. She had finally landed a hit.

I looked to see if it was on target.

Her foil was pinned to my right nut. She’s obviously scored, why won’t she move it?

Suddenly, the pain cleared my mind of all these thoughts. I collapsed to the ground, clutching my dear nut for all I was worth. I needed ice. I needed a hospital.

The judge, a cute asian with large tits, bent over me. “Righty’s gone. All you have left is the left one.”

What? It was just one hit. But feeling around my sac, I realized she was right. Through the pain, I realized my right cords ended only in mush. I began to cry.

“Stand back, I’m a nurse.” The judge bent over and grabbed ahold of my sack. “It’s not completely mush, and they might be able to save it if you go in 15, 20 minutes tops.”

I headed for the door, when I felt a hand grab my already-mangled sac and pull it backwards.

“Where do you think you are going? 1 point to opponent. Good hit, keep it up Jenny.”

“I…need to go to the hospital.”

“The bout’s almost over. You can manage.”

I couldn’t believe her cruelty. Her smile was so familiar. Her tits were nearly popping out. What kind of judge wears that uniform?

I hobbled back to the starting line, hoping to god that I would get this last point quickly.

“Ready, fence!”

Of course, she lunged again. This time, I couldn’t even attempt to block. The nutpain racked my entire body.

I felt the blade land, on the only place it could. My left nut took the brunt of the blow, as my right nut disintegrated fully.
POP!

This one was loud. The judge didn’t even need to manhandle me to tell that I was now a eunuch.

“Good point, jenny. Jeremy, you get a black card for bad sportsmanship. It’s unacceptable to crumple on the ground after every point. Jenny, you win! Jeremy, let’s call you an ambulance and finish this sex change.”

I lay on the ground, holding what used to be my sex organs. I hardly even noticed when the judge/nurse kicked my legs apart to stomp on them, finishing the job Jenny had started.
————————————————————————

Another nightmare, of course. I woke up and felt my rockhard cock, now a mere 3.5 inches. I couldn’t wait for these pills to wear off.

But something else was up. My shorts were soaked. Feeling around, I realized I had jizzed all over myself again. I remember bitterly the nurse’s words about testosterone, and how I should avoid orgasm, before drifting off to sleep.

————————————————————————

Wednesday evening. I had stripped as soon as I walked into Karen’s office, even though she didn’t ask me to. It just felt natural.

“Have the nightmares gone away yet?” she inquired hopefully. When I relayed her the tale of the particularly cruel fencing instructor, she look crestfallen.

“Did you have both of your balls in the dream? Before they were ruptured, of course.”

“yeah.”

She laughed. “That must have been nice. Having your other ball back, even if it was only a dream.”

“I guess…It was incredibly painful as usual. There wasn’t much to enjoy about it.”

She returned to her previous stern expression.

“I can’t believe it…That last session should have cured you…”

“Maybe…the rupture ruined the therapy? You weren’t expecting it to happen, right?”

She bit her lip. She wasn’t telling me something.

“You…didn’t meant to pop it, right?”

“Not right then. But I mean…I definitely had to rupture it at some point.”

WHAT?!

“That’s the only way to permanently cure castration anxiety! Get you to the brink of castration. It really makes you grateful for your remaining nut!”

I felt like I was sinking. How could she do this to me?
“So…you popped my nut on purpose?”

“I got a little caught up in the role playing. It was early; usually the popping follows weeks of bruising and kneeing and kicking and whatnot.”

At this point, I’m almost glad she took my nut so early.

“But…there is one other option…”

I listened meekly, still barely grasping the reality of the situation. Karen had purposely driven her heel into my nut hard enough to rupture it. She had made me half a eunuch. How many other men has she half-castrated?

“During your dream last night, you were aroused again?”

I nodded.

“Did you happen to ejaculate during your arousal? I know you have…problems with ejaculation.”

I nodded again. I was hardly even embarrassed of my sexual failings at this point; Karen was used to them.

“I have an idea!”

“As long as it keeps my other nut intact, I’m game for any-“

OOF.

Her knee connected with my ball. How she came off her chair and onto the couch so fast, I’ll never know.

This knee was somehow even more vicious than any from the weeks before. I could literally feel my nut deform beneath her weight, as she pressed it into the couch.

“I’ve been misdiagnosing you all along!”

A fist connected with my sole nugget of manhood, flattening it against the couch beneath.

“You don’t have castration anxiety at all! You have castration anticipation!”

A heel stomped into my mostly-empty sac, and my ball swelled up to fill the space left by its missing brother.

“It’s much rarer. You see, in some men, the psychoanalytical signals are mixed. Rather than being scared of castration, you desire it!”

I tried to explain to her that I most certainly did not desire such a thing, but it’s hard to form words when a

OOF

Another sharp toe jabbed into my ball. I was crying openly, and lay in the fetal position on the floor. Karen stood above me, looking down. From my vantage point, I could see up her skirt, and realized that she was wearing no underwear.

My dick stood rock hard.

“See? Even now, as you know that I’m going to crush your nut, you’re erect! You’ve been wanting this!”

I managed to get to my feet and run to the door. Forget my clothes. This is insane. I don’t want to lose my nut. It’s all I have.

It was locked.

I felt a familiar tug from behind. Karen had my ball in a vice grip, and was pulling with all her might. I couldn’t believe this was happening again.

SMUSH

Her knee came between my buttcheeks, and slammed all of my manhood back up into me.

“You won’t have to worry about your dick anymore either. With your balls gone, sex won’t be an option.”

THUD

Her toe connected with bone. My ball had really gone up inside of me, and gotten trapped. I could feel it swelling against the inside of my inguinal canal. It was going to pop. My own body was going to pop my last ball.

“Oh no you don’t. I’m getting this one.”

She laid me down. I had no control of my body at this point. Once again, my mind had been reduced to a numb nexus of pain.

Her heel stomped on my nut as hard as she could with her heel, leaving a mark on my belly where my nut was hidden. Three more times her foot descended over my hidden testicle, and three more times I experienced more agony than most men feel in their entire lifetime. Finally, the ball popped out, twice as large as it went in.

I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted this over.

“Why cant…you just….cut it off? You have a burdizzo.”

She paused for a minute. “Y’know, I bet that would be just as effective…”

Mercy. Finally.

“But this is really so much more fun. You think I haven’t noticed you looked up and down my clothes every chance you get?”

I was truly fucked.

SLAM

SLAM

SPLAT

SQUIIIIISHH

My nut gave way to mush, and her heel connected with the floor. A geyser of semen erupted out of my now-useless dick, and I thought back to that blowjob I never got. And never will. My penis lost its last erection, and Karen stood over me. I could see her pussy perfectly now, as her skirt was off. She was rubbing away furiously, like it was the last orgasm she would ever have.

Last orgasm ever. Like she would know what that’s like…

I lay on the floor, crying in pain as she cried out in pleasure to her first orgasm.

“I…castrated you. For real. You’ll never have sex again….”

Another orgasm gripped her, and I passed out.

——————————————————————————

I awoke in a familiar hospital, greeted by a familiar face. My gown was already lifted up, leaving what was left of my genitals visible to anyone once again.

“What a surprise, Mr. Jeremy. It looks like you didn’t bother getting a cup.”

That goddamn nurse again.

“It’s much too late now, of course. Both your testicles are irreparably damaged. You will never have children.”
She giggled like this was the funniest thing she’d ever heard.

“Of course, you can adopt. Or pay a real man to fuck your wife. But your genetic line has ended.”

“Not that that little worm would have passed much on to begin with. I’d be surprised if a peashooter like that could even clear the barrel, if you know what I mean.”

She laughed again. “I’m so glad we can joke about it, now that both of your nuts are gone. After all, you can hardly be sensitive about how small it is, now that it’s totally useless.”

She straightened up. “Of course, I’m exaggerating. Many ‘men’ go on to live long and healthy sex lives after losing their nuts! You’re going to need your therapist to write you a prescription for testosterone though. It will allow you to still have erections and orgasms, even if they’re completely pointless.”

I perked up. I didn’t know about that at all!

“Assuming you want to keep your penis, that it. Many men have a full penectomy after sustaining…your type of injury.”

“What? Why would I want that?”

“It’s just…less hassle. Like I said, your penis is…quite small. I frankly don’t see the point keeping it. It’s hardly aesthetically pleasing.”

This was humiliating.

“Yes, I would like to keep my penis. Can I go yet? I need to go talk to my therapist.”

The nurse continued staring at my dick. It really was small now, but it looked a little bigger without my nuts dwarfing it for once.

“Yeah, you can go. No stitched to worry about now, since your whole sack is gone.”
—–

A week went by. No nightmares for once.
—–

I go into Karen’s office. I stay clothed now, and explain to her the situation.

“So I think my castration disorder, whatever it was, is cured. All I need is for you to write me a prescription for testosterone so I can have my sex life back, and we’re done.”

I couldn’t believe I was talking civilly to the woman who had unmanned me. I guess I was thankful, in a way. After all, she had cured me, and if I could still have sex, what more could I want?

She looked up at me, mystified. “Why would you possibly need that prescription for?”

“To…so I can still be a man.”

“Jeremy, you’re no more a man now than I am, and you never will be.”

This was not going well.

“Your desire for castration won’t be fulfilled if you can still have sex and get erections. It’s not about losing your testicles. It’s about losing your manhood. It needs to be permanent. I’m sorry, but I cannot in good conscious approve of something that will bring back a disorder we spent so long curing.”

“But…I’ll be a eunuch…”

“You ARE a eunuch. Look at you! The only piece of your manhood left is that penis.”

She smirked. “And let’s face it, there’s not much left of that after the penis-shrinking pills I gave you.”

“What…”

“You really think there’s a functional drug on the market that grows your dick an inch and a half? Get real. That loss is permanent, just like your balls. I’ll write a recommendation for a penectomy, but that’s the only thing you’ll get from me.”

——————————————
I refused the penectomy. I tried to hang onto the tiny scrap of manhood I had left, but it was shrinking away from me. Literally. Without my balls, my penis shrank to a thimble sized bump above my castration scar. I have to sit down to pee now, and the thought of sex is a long-lost dream.

The castration dreams come back occasionally. I’m thankful when I get them. They’re the only time I can be a man, even if it’s for a short time.
—————————————-

Feedback? I’ve been reading stories on here for a long time, and finally wanted to try my own. I wrote all of this today, and haven’t really edited it or anything, so sorry it got so long, and for grammar errors and stuff.


Is it weird to jack off to your own stuff?

It’s an Extraterrestrial Matter

Listen, this is a headcanon, it’s not fact, so don’t come at me if there are inaccuracies, it’s just how I feel Kara is as a character, okay, and of course I had to write it through Sanvers’ eyes. Enjoy! P.s. Sorry for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes!

“What’s the deal with your sister?" 

Alex looks to her right to see Maggie coming up beside her, leaning against the counter, the detective is staring straight forward, as Alex had been previously before, watching the scene, the family, in front of them, arguing and laughing over a game of scrabble that Alex had excused herself from only to get another glass of wine - and only after she had threatened the lives of her friends not to change any of the tiles or cheat… Alex took her scrabble very seriously. 

The agent frowns at her girlfriend and looks back out at the scene, Kara was flustered, laughing in her over top way that Alex had seen her do around James, a lot, but this time it was directed at something Lena Luthor had just said and the others were staring at Kara like she was insane. 

Alex chuckles a little and turns her back on the scene, focusing now on Maggie who turns her body towards Alex. "What do you mean?” Alex questions with confusion and Maggie looks at Kara briefly. 

“Listen, I know the whole gaydar thing isn’t a science-” Alex laughs at that and Maggie rolls her eyes. “I mean you definitely don’t have one-" 

Hey!“ Alex protests. So maybe she was a little oblivious when it came to that sort of thing - not that it really mattered since she had Maggie, she didn’t need anything else. ”You’re the one who read me wrong, remember?“ 

"Okay but that’s just because you started flirting with me all of a sudden.” Maggie retorts and Alex narrows her eyes. 

“I was not flirting, I was being a friend." 

"Right, and that worked out didn’t it Danvers?” Maggie was teasing her, of course she was, and, if it wasn’t for Maggie’s beautiful stupid grin, and her dimpled cheeks, and shining brown eyes, Alex would’ve teased her right back but she was just a little, well, a lot, distracted. 

“You kissed me.” Alex reminds her and Maggie crosses her arms and raises an eyebrow, her full blown smile falling into a smirk and god was it sexy. 

“You kissed me first.” Maggie responds and Alex blushes a little at the memory. She was so embarrassed by that day, still, despite it working out in a good way, the best way possible, but, still, it got her here, standing in Kara’s kitchen with her girlfriend, she still couldn’t believe it, she had a girlfriend

“You were asking about my sister,” Alex says, changing the subject, she’d let Maggie win that round but she wouldn’t win the next one. “I have to warn you though, if you’re about to say something bad against her, I wouldn’t.” Alex may like Maggie a lot, hell, maybe even love, but if she said something against Kara, if the pair hadn’t got along well, then Alex doesn’t even know what she would do. 

“No, no, I love little Danvers,” Maggie says dismissively and Alex chuckles at the nickname that Maggie has bestowed upon her little sister. “No, I mean, I just can’t get a read on her…” Maggie says thoughtfully and Alex knits her eyebrows together in confusion. 

“She’s clearly flirting with Lena, well, she’s being flirted with,” Alex turns to look at them again to see Kara fiddling nervously with her glasses while Lena just smiles and eyes her little sister. The agent narrows her eyes suspiciously at them, they were getting awfully close these past few weeks after Kara had saved Lena from a kryptonite explosion. “but your sister clearly likes her.” Alex tunes back into Maggie’s voice and turns away from the gathering for a moment. 

“But then she’s also had relationships with guys right? Like James… and that Adam dude you told me about,” Alex almost laughs at the concentration on Maggie’s face and raises one eyebrow and smiles in amusement; it was like she was trying to figure out some extreme math equation and not Alex’s little sister’s love life. “and I get the sense that she’s not straight, she clearly has something going on with James, and obviously Lena, I mean, that one is really obvious-" 

"Are you trying to figure out if my sister is straight or gay?” Alex interrupts Maggie’s thoughts and the detective presses her lips into a thin line and places her hands on her hips in exasperation. 

“No case left unsolved,” The detective states and Alex laughs at her girlfriend and Maggie rolls her eyes. Alex holds her stomach a little from all of her laughter, taking a deep breath to help replenish her oxygen supply, even her eyes were watering. “Fine, is she bi?” Maggie asks outwardly and Alex manages to gather herself, and takes a deep breath to compose herself, before responding. 

“Kind of,” Alex answers and Maggie turns her head to the side and a crease forms on her brow in confusion. “she came to Earth when she twelve." 

"So…?” Maggie asks, still not getting it, she shakes her head and Alex takes a step closer. 

So, Krypton wasn’t like Earth, it didn’t have gay, straight, bi, it was just, you meet someone you like, you mate them,” Alex explains with a shrug. “I mean, I’m sure some kryptonians did have preferences for some genders but, they were efficient guys up there, reproduction was done in like tubes, actually, Kal is the only naturally conceived kryptonian in centuries, but, on Krypton, they were just encouraged to marry whoever they fell in love with, and Kara grew up with that incentive.” Alex says and Maggie listens intently, clearly very invested in the details - and she calls Alex a nerd. “Plus they were restricted to one baby per family and Kara’s DNA is really complicated, who knows if same sex couples could have biological babies, the Kryptonians were a really advanced species, plus, hello, aliens.” Maggie laughs at that and Alex smiles in response. 

“To answer your question, Kara’s kryptonian, she’ll choose her mate based on compatibility, on what she likes about them, not on gender, so I guess she’s pansexual, if you want to earthly brand her." 

"What did the Kryptonians class as being compatible?” Maggie asks curiously and Alex shrugs, they don’t know an awful lot about the kryptonians, only what Kara can remember, what Kal had learned from the fortress and the other pieces of information gathered from their pods. 

“Who knows? Probably intelligence, to them we’re like cave men who could only dream about being on their level.” Maggie smiles and leans in close to Alex, wrapping her arms around her waist and Alex smiles gazing down at her girlfriend. “But, you know, Kara also grew up with Earth’s social construct and, compared to Krypton, it’s pretty fucked up. So people automatically assume she’s straight, and I guess when I came out to her I reminded her of Krypton, about how being straight isn’t the only option." 

"Enter Lena right?” Maggie asks with amusement, because Alex is oblivious but she’s not that oblivious, and Alex laughs leaning her head forward to press it against Maggie’s. 

“Enter Lena Luthor.” She confirms - she did have the intelligence. 

They stand in silence for a moment, just enjoying one another’s company, Maggie can feel Alex’s thumbs gently stroking at the back of her neck and she’s more than willing, more than content, just to stand there and not move… but she has to ask something else, because she’s already opened the Krypton can of worms, she might as well go all the way. 

“So Mike,” Maggie says and Alex’s eyes flutter open, momentarily distracting Maggie, and she pauses when she feels Alex’s thumbs stop stroking and she almost whines for her to continue. “He’s from decks- dacks- Daxam?” Maggie’s face scrunches up adorably and Alex grins at her fumble with the planet’s name. 

“Yeah,” Alex responds. “same social construct as Krypton, except, maybe a little looser on its morals, party central according to Kara." 

"So that’s why James calls Mon-El frat boy.” Maggie chuckles and Alex nods. She’d noticed that James and Maggie had been getting along quite well recently and she loved that her friends seemed to love Maggie, a lot, because they were her family and they were all important to her. 

“Yep, but it was colonized by Krypton way back when, before they left the planet to itself, but, you know, the whole be with who you want to be with thing was still pretty strong, hell, according to Mon-El they even had polyamorous relationships.” Alex explains and Maggie nods her head in understanding. 

“So you totally pick up on the whole Winn and Mon-El thing too right?” Maggie asks and Alex laughs out loud this time, nodding her head repeatedly, because of course she picked up on that - Winn was the least subtle person she knew, he was even worse than Kara. “I’d like to hear more about Krypton, it sounds fascinating.” Maggie admits and Alex smiles softly. 

“I’m sure Kara would tell you some stories,” Alex says. “she likes to keep the memory of Krypton alive in her head, so she doesn’t forget it, she’d be more than happy to talk to you about it.” Alex says and Maggie nods her head, she might just have to ask the blonde about the planet. 

“Oh snap!” Alex’s head peers over Maggie as she hears Winn’s excited yell. 

“Alex! Lena just beat your score!” Kara shouts and Alex narrows her eyes. 

“Oh hell no.” Alex mutters and Maggie chuckles, placing a kiss to Alex’s cheek, she turns her around and past her butt towards the living room where the game of scrabble was commencing. 

“You’re going down Luthor!” Alex says and Maggie shakes her head at how competitive Alex was especially when it came to scrabble. 

“That’s not the first time I’ve heard that before.” Lena says with a smirk and Maggie’s eyes widen while Kara, who was beside her, starts blushing to a blood red, almost like she might explode. 

Kara Zor-El of Krypton was such a prude.

Please Don’t Leave - Auston Matthews

Originally posted by wonthetrade

Ok, so I wrote this pretty quickly last night since my work schedule’s been all over the place so I didn’t edit it, oops!  Sorry in advance if there are any god-awful errors!  I hope you guys enjoy this one! Much love pals! <3

Word count: 1118

Warnings: a couple swear words!

Request: “Hey can you do an Auston Matthews imagine with prompt 152? Thanks! Love this blog btw :)” - @thecrosby-chronicles

Prompt: #152 “Please don’t leave me.”

Up next: Jake Guentzel

***********************

“Good morning Aus” you murmured as you rolled into your boyfriend’s side.  

He squinted his eyes then gave you a small grin before wrapping his arm around your waist, pulling you tightly against him.  “Morning love.”

Keep reading

Important Life Update...

Hey guys, I just want start off by saying I’m so sorry I’ve been absent for the past couple months. I love you guys dearly and as Tumblr is my happy place where I can express myself and forget about all the shitty things in the world, I thought it was only fair that I share with you what’s been going on.
Since the the last couple weeks in my senior year of high school I have been getting very badly sick, from bronchitis 4 months in a row to constant, severe chest infections and pneumonia. I’m now just finished my sophomore year of college and this last semester I have been in and out of the hospital nonstop and getting worse. The most frustrating thing is all of the the doctors kept saying they could find nothing wrong with me and that it was “probably just a virus.” These past couple months when i was getting worse I was told by many doctors it was “all in my head,” simply because I was profiled as a drug and attention seeker due to my age demographic.
After weeks of painfulI and repetitive testing, I finally found out over the last couple months that I have a very rare form of cancer called, “glioblastoma grade 4.” This is apparently a fast growing cancer in the brain that had been making me become sicker and sicker as time went on. During these past couple months that I’ve been absent, it spread to my spinal cord, and finally to my lungs. As of right now, the prognosis doesn’t look that good, but I’m done putting life on hold because of cancer. I WILL graduate from college and study what I love, and I WILL continue blog and be back on Tumblr full time. I think of you guys as my family and nothing makes me happier than interacting with you guys and blogging about our favorite things ❤️❤️❤️
I’m so sorry for the long message, but I needed to share it with you all. Tumblr and you guys are my happy place where cancer doesn’t exist and I can just be myself and enjoy the things I love with you guys, for the time that I have left. I absolutely adore Marvel and Star Wars with all of my heart, and they’ve been my own saving grace through all of this. They’ve taught me that no matter how bad things get, or how weak you may feel, to never give up without a fight. As of right now, I’m not sure I’ll still be here when The Last Jedi comes out, let alone Avengers Infinity War, and It would mean the absolute world to me if you guys could signal boost this for me. To have a message from one of my heroes would indescribable. I’ve come to terms with things and I like to look at it as I AM dying, it’s just at a faster rate than most people. At the end of the day, I love you guys soooooo much and I’m not going to let this disease stop me from living the rest of my Star Wars fandom-obsessed life lol. As my hero, Carrie Fisher, once said, “Stay afraid, but do it anyway.”