this dog puts up with so much shit

“who are you and why have you knitted my cat a sweater” au

february 14 | “proposal”
(Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! Here’s the overview of my favorite AU of the week, plus a bonus tiny excerpt to start you off right. ;D)

Gabriel’s cat hates everyone and everything, except he’s suddenly decided it’s time to move in with their new neighbor, Jack. Gabriel only finds out about this because Reaper comes home wearing the world’s ugliest handmade sweater. Gabriel can’t believe his eyes. Reaper hisses when he tries to take the sweater off.

Gabriel sticks a note to Reaper’s collar that reads, “Who are you and why have you knitted my cat a sweater?” So begins Jack and Gabriel’s correspondence via post-it notes.

Jack’s veteran support group had suggested finding a way to keep his hands busy, so he decided to knit a sweater for the lonely cat that keeps sneaking into his apartment. It must be cold if it keeps curling up in his lap, right? Jack is a dog person so he is completely clueless about cats. He pretty much treats Reaper like a dog but Reaper is a weirdo who loves him anyway.

BONUS: Gabriel’s cat is an accurate predictor of his relationships with other people. So when Gabriel sees Reaper being a total sweetheart and purring as Jack puts Ugly Sweater 2.0 on him, he accidentally blurts, “Holy shit, marry me.”


EXCERPT

Gabriel stares down in utter disbelief. His cat is wearing a sweater. His cat—Reaper, a feisty little bastard who hates just about everyone and bites anything that moves—is wearing a sweater. A hideous, obviously hand-knitted sweater that Gabriel has never even seen before, let alone put on his sweater-hating cat.

Keep reading

Shance headcannons

If you ain’t about that #Shaladin life step off,, I will not be reduced to arguing with you or have you trigger anyone. So step off and go away


DOMESTIC//EARTH

-as stated earlier, Lance can ice skate,, Shiro is absolute shit at it. Lance tends to cover the free skates he sees (give me all of the free skates!!!)
-Shiro loves seeing Lance dance (especially to bumpin’ reggaeton music)
-Jfc Lance’s hips do not fucking lie
-Lance is the domestic one
-Is an okay cook (Hunk is ready to tutor him)
-Don’t mess with his Champurrado or Horchata (unless you’re Shiro or willing to die)
-Shiro is the cuddler,, notorious for stealing Lance’s stuffed animals.
-especially the giant blue and black cat Shiro made (it looks pretty shitty) (all lop sided and what the fuck else)
-Lance has a YouTube channel (Chimi_Your_Changas) is a DIY/Cover artist/Boyfriend tag/reaction vid/beauty guru (is hella jealous of Shiro’s natural eyelashes)
-what the fuck bruh
-Shiro also has a YouTube channel Kieth made for him (Shiro-Gone-Ayyeee (not even a part of this fandom,, I just wanted to make a joke abt his disappearing act)). It’s where he posts him exploring abandoned places/game plays/vlogs/reaction videos
-They cuddle anywhere and everywhere
-both marathon yuuri on ice/Studio Ghibli/Poco’s Udon World/any gay friendly anime
-Lance cries eveytime
-They can’t have movie nights (After a minute into the movie Shiro will have already pieced the entire thing together & knows who will die//suffer)
-He loses interest and starts doing freaky shit to Lance under the covers
-Lance is very sore the next day

SPACE

-Lance gets lost hella easily on the ship,, Shiro always finds him
-every time. (“Didn’t I say I’d always find you?”)
-Skirted around each other until Lance nearly dies
-Shiro doesn’t eat, sleep, or shower for days
-He snaps at the team when they make flippant remarks pertaining to how often lance gets hurt//how he goofs off alot without meaning to
-Lance is the only one that can be in Shiro’s immediate vicinity after being triggered by Haggar
-Haggar tries to play on Lance’s insecurities to get him on Zarkon’s side
-Lance don’t fuck with that Brujería fuckshit
-They eventually move into one of their rooms.
-Lance has too many plants and Shiro is a bibliophile
-The room is too fucking tumblr
-especially with the soft color changing running light
-One wall is glass. (“I think lotor saw my ass…”//“Where is my bayard ”)
-Everyone else is slightly motivated to protect their power couple
-Speaking of power,, Lance (under Shiro’s guidance gets better at fighting///yesssss)
-Lance is a staple in the Voltron family dynamic
-Shiro acts like a concerd brother/father,, Lance (has a very big family and knows his way in maternal instincts after babysitting so damn much) is the doting mother figure who isn’t afraid to “kick your scrawny ass, put my shit tf down right now”
-Lance realizes he is important and he has a place
-Space pets?? Fuck yeah! Lance straight up takes a strange ferret/cat thing,, Shiro takes a bird/dog.
-cuddle puddles?? Hell yes. Always find them in thier room underneath the pets and a mountain of blankets
-Kieth complains about how sweet and sickly they are (klunk happens and lance is merciless in teasing)

SMUT
-Shiro is a hair puller, he also like to bite
-Mumbles praises in Japanese (Lance is a praise whore)
-on occasion Shiro cries
-Lance gets overstimulated easily
-babbles in Spanish or Gaelic
-drools/tears up when properly fucked out
-Lance is a screamer
-Shiro revels in bringing one of the most centered paladins to tears/a puddle of drool
-Lance likes lingerie and Shiro likes watching Lance model
-Lance wears the kinkiest lingerie under his civilian clothing
-both are slight exhibitionists
-Shiro is the kinkiest one

GENERAL

-Lance has a shit immune system and gets sick easily,, he isn’t a baby about it until the ear aches
-He cries only when he has an ear ache
-which can only be cured by roasting a clove of galric on a pan and wrapping that shit in a cotton ball and jamming that in his ear (old Mexican fix me up,, right next to drinking off brand sprite for tummy aches and The Egg™)
-theres no garlic in space
-Shiro feels like his soul has been torn just by the sounds of muffled cries and sobs of Lance’s pain
-Shiro has PTSD,, only Lance can get him to clam down
-Lance cusses in Spanish (if its bad enough in Gaelic)
-Shiro doesn’t cuss,, what kind of space dad do you take him for??
-Lance does yoga and pushes Shiro to join…both are incredibly flexible now and can pull of some Cirque du Soleil shit
-Lance is very religious//superstitious
-Shiro is polytheistic and gets excited about ghosts.
-doesn’t even care about aliens (give the man some damn ghosts)

This happened to me earlier, I shared it with my Facebook friends and some have shared it to raise awareness. Hopefully this can be helpful the next time someone is in trouble.

So I’m at the Walmart returning something when this girl comes up to me and gives me a hi and a smile and we start making small talk, how’ve you been, that sort of thing. I couldn’t tell if I knew her or not because I’ve met a lot of people here and there, I felt bad because I couldn’t place her for the life of me.

Then she said she wants to show me her new dog, and I see she pulled up a text message and wrote, “Help me the man in a brown is bothering me I’m scared” and I’m thinking oh shit, nope, this is not happening, it stops now.

So I grabbed her by the shoulders and said, “It’s so great that we can be friends after the breakup, I still care about you very much!” She looks bewildered (she didn’t expect another girl to say this to her), and the guy looked shocked, shook his head, and walked away. I told her I’d walk her to her car and put my arm around her. The guy was in the parking lot walking away so he didn’t follow us.

I made sure she was in her car and told her sorry if I made her uncomfortable but she was more shaken by the guy, she said he’d been following her around the store, asking her if she wants to go back to his house, if she’s wearing panties, and other, sicker things. She’s 19 and lives nearby, going to school, and I told her she’s very smart for what she did. She says she saw a tip to avoid creeps like that online and it worked, I’m glad it did.

Creeps are everywhere.

Book of the Atlantic Reactions
  • UNDERTAKER!!!!!! 
  • Ok so like they fucking went ham on Sebastian’s eye glowy thing that he does. Like hot fucking damn they do not let you forget that he’s a demon. And it’s just so fucking sexy?? With his eyes all sharp and red and hngggg
  • UNDERTAKER
  • Lizzie being Lizzie. Fucking awesome omg. That scene did not disappoint they did SO GREAT. THE WIFE OF THE QUEEN’S GUARD DOG FUCK YEAH. She lost her shit ain’t no freaky zombies better touch her man or else *puts up fists*
  • Snake doing the voices for his snakes lmfao omg I love that boy
  • UNDERTAKER!!
  • Baby Ciel happily drinking milk with honey is my new aesthetic
  • The fact that they actually incorporated Sebastian getting all misty black into his ‘demon-ish’ form which was AWESOME 
  • Seeing the Ciel/Lizzie dynamic was just amazing. I feel so pumped to write something for them. Because despite everything my god you really see how much they’re willing to fight for each other and that shit is my jam. 
  • Grey being a salty salty
  • GRELL. AGHHHH DA BEST.
  • Hearing Knox call Grell ‘senpai’ 
  • Waiting until the end of the credits to see WILL!!! *heart throbbing*
  • UNDERTAKER
  • Ok the fact that like they took the key scenes from the manga and just like kept them there for an extra few seconds so we could all soak in the deliciousness. When undertaker reveals his eyes and says the whole ‘how sad should laughter disappear’ thing, the one where he’s holding the woman zombie doll thing, and the whole death scythe GAHH. 
  •  WHEN THEY FADE HIS FACE FROM A SKULL LIKE OMG HE IS REALLY -DEATH- YOU KNOW LIKE GWAHHH YAAASS AMAZING.
  • the fact that I dragged the bf along so he could finally explain the hell of a butler phrase to me lmao.
  • PROBABLY A LOT MORE BUT IT’S MIDNIGHT AND SO I’M SLEEP K THANKS
boy squad + kittens

[Read it on AO3!]

Isak: Sanaaaaaaaa

Sana: Yes, Isabell?

Isak: the boys saw pictures of your kittens

And they were wondering if they could come round and see them

Sana: which boys

Isak: rude

I would know who you were talking about if you said the girls

You should pay more attention to me Sanasol

Take an interest in my friendships

Sana: …yes you can all come and see them

All five of you?

Come over tomorrow after school

Isak: Takk Sanasol!

*

Sana has to admit she finds it a bit weird that this is her life now. Ever since she revealed to her friends that her mama fosters kittens, people want to come and see them. And now she’s ended up with Isak’s “squad” round at her house, sitting in what she refers to as “the kitten room,” all five of them absolutely melting into the floor at the sight of several six-week-old kittens.

Keep reading

parkkate  asked:

omg okay, sorry I'm spamming you with this hahaha. You totally don't have to do it, I mean you already did the two things I asked for <3 Buuuuut here's another drarry line ;) "Have you no shame?"

(Nooo, so much fun!! Not need to apologise! I never put a limit on it!)

“Have you no shame?”

Draco looked up. “Shame is boring.”

Harry groaned, roaming his gaze back over their two dogs. 

One was dressed in a little replica of a Slytherin uniform, and the other a Gryffindor. He’d bloody dyed a lightning bolt on her damn face, and somehow managed to get her not to knock off a pair of glasses.

“We’re not walking them like that,” he said firmly. The last thing he needed was more shit from his friends and another stupid front page story about them.

Harry grit his teeth and refused to let Draco touch him while they walked around the park. The reporters were not even trying to conceal themselves. They’d be front page news, again. Why did he marry this idiot?


(Send me one line, I’ll write the next 5, one of the options for my 1k milestone)

THIS WRITING ON MY SKIN

Description: you finally find the soulmate you write messages on your wrist to.

pairing: Ethan x reader

warnings: swearing as always

:{——————————————–}:

You’d been searching for your soulmate for as long as you had known about it. When you were four and your mother explained the soulmate bond you were instantly hooked. The fact that art you drew on your skin would show up on your soulmates made your life that much more interesting. You began to become a better artist everyday so that the things you put on your skin would be beautiful enough to please whoever you were linked to.

You drew beautiful things and the you drew the stupidest shit you could think of in discreet places. On your hips there would be horse and dog morphs or turtle bags. But your arms, legs, and feet would be covered in geometric designs and creatures of a new fantasy you were able to create. Your grocery lists would show up on his palm or wrist which he would smile at as you wrote down the silliest words to help you remember.

But his favorite thing by far had to be the motivational and loving words that would pop up on his palm or inner elbow. When his day would get rough he could simply ask for some encouraging words and you were easily cheering him up in seconds. It was the way it was written in the loopy cursive he had designated as yours and the way it was portrayed. Like a poet had spoken those words, but when he googled them no one showed up they were your own. So he began journaling your poems and words in a little book his brother thought was the cutest thing ever.

It just so happened that you stumbled across the dolan twins earlier that day and had been watching all of their videos quickly figuring out that they posted every Tuesday. It was also quite intriguing that Ethan had such familiar drawings across his fingers and biceps. And when he would hold his hands out your loopy cursive sat there on his wrist sometimes spelling out the words milk, eggs, and flour. Baking and drawing. those were your passions and now you had found the person you were supposed to share those passions with. It was Sunday and yesterday they had posted a video, one of their random day ones, telling their fans to send in questions for them to answer. So you devised a plan to let him know you were watching and you finally knew who he was.

So you tweeted out to him. “@ethandolan if you answer this please message me before so I can write something on your wrist.” And I just so happened that the next day, Monday, when they were filming Ethan dolan messaged you on twitter.

“Hey.” It said the nervous and suspicious emoji faces after it. You raced around to find the nearest pen and began writing on your wrist.

“Hi, my names Y/n I’m suprised we’ve never asked for eachothers names before.”

The next message you received from his twitter was in all caps lock and seemed to be from him and Grayson.

“HOLY SHIT. NO FUCKING WAY I CANT BELIEVE DO YOU THINK I COULD HAVE YOUR NUMBER TO FACETIME OR SOMETHING.” You snickered as your phone lit up with another message. You expected it to be Ethan but Grayson’s twitter user was popped up and waiting.

“You hurt him I hurt you.” Your eyes widened at the words before you relaxed.

“I hurt him I will gladly let you break my nose.” You turned back to your wrist and wrote your number down. Your twitter then lit up again and you saw that Grayson had responded.

“He looks like a kid on Christmas. If you get a call in like an hour it’s probably him.” Your eyes widened as you looked at yourself in the mirror. You looked like a mess and honestly you weren’t going to let Ethan’s first impression of you be you and your room looking like a hurricane rolled through.

“Thanks for the heads up it looks like hurricane Katrina just went thorugh my room.” Grayson snorted from his spot next to Ethan who looked up his eyes lit up.

“What are you laughing at?”

“Your soulmate.”

“What? What’d she say.” Grayson showed him the text and he smiled. “Honestly same. Omg bro do I look okay what if she watches this video and I look like shit?” Ethan’s eyes widened and Grayson began calming him down as you on the other side of the US cleaned your room to perfection. Your desk was now spotless as was your floor. It was easy seeing as you being in college at the early age of 16, you didn’t have much in your dorm room.

You pulled out your makeup with 30 minutes left on the metaphorical clock Grayson had given you. You did an easy nude look and the sharpest eyeliner you’d ever managed to pull off. Happy with your eyes you applied mascara and highlight for days. You looked like a glazed donut by the time you were done.

“Incoming in like 5 minutes.” Grayson sent you another message and you breathed out a sigh of relief.

“So I’m guessing you’re editing the video today?” You sent back to him.

“Definitely Ethan will be too busy admiring you to be able to do it. I’ll just have to force him to help. The title ETHAN FINDS HIS SOULMATE.”

“You’re kidding right?”

“No I’m dead serious.”

“Do not do that Grayson.”

“Too bad half the content is him freaking out about your drawings and the tweet.”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously, you’ll see in tommorow video.”

“Oh god on a scale of 1-10 how crazy you does it get.”

“He almost did the splits.”

“Fuck.” Just then your phone rang and a new number popped up in the screen. 916-***-**** would like to FaceTime.

“That’s him.” Grayson messaged you. A deep breath in and you answered the call.

“Hi.” Your voice was quiet as Ethan stared at you with the same intensity you stared at him.

“Holy shit.” You both muttered. “You’re beautiful.”

“Probably more beautiful in real life.” He added.

“Are you in LA right now?” You asked.

“Yeah where does your beautiful self reside at the moment?” He asked his eyes still scanning all he could as you set your phone down on your desk propped up on you computer mouse.

“The other side of the country, New York.”

“Damn. And what is a beautiful woman like yourself doing in New York?”

“College.”

“Studying?”

“Trying to master in cooking and the culinary art. And major in the literary and fine arts.”

“Damn my woman’s artistically inclined can I get any luckier.”

“Damn my mans a hilarious human being that makes me smile in the darkest times can I get any luckier.” You didn’t mean just his videos with Grayson. No, you weren’t the only one to write encouraging words to the other. His handwriting would pop up in the middle of class telling you to have a good day and hang in there when you had ranted to him the night before through your skin.

Your smiles couldn’t possibly get any bigger as Grayson called Ethan in to help him edit in the warehouse.

“And let me see your woman.” Ethan pulled Grayson into frame as you blushed at the new found atttention you were getting.

“Aw she’s blushing.” Grayson cooed as you buried your head into your hands.

“Leave me alone you goof. I just met the guy I’m going to try to spend the rest of my life with. When you meet yours show me how you react and I’ll make fun of you.” It was Ethan’s turn to turn bright red at you words.

You actually accepted him as your soulmate. You actually wanted him. And he hoped not just for the fame.

“I think I’m done editing.” It was Tuesday in New York and LA, now it was 8 am in New York and 1 am in LA. “Sneak peak for the special woman in Ethan’s life.” Ethan flipped the camera as Grayson jumped to a random part of the video. It was Grayson reading the tweet you had tweeted to Ethan.

“’@ethandolan if you answer this please message me so I can write something on your wrist.’ How can someone write something on your wrist if they’re not the-” Grayson cut himself off as they looked at the mandalas on Ethan left arm. “You think?” Grayson whispered.

“Only one way to find out.” Ethan typed out the message he had sent to you and showed it to the camera. “And now we wait.” Grayson paused the video and turned in the skinny chair.

“You’ll have to watch the rest in the video. Which will be up in 6 hours.” You laughed as Grayson and Ethan got hyped and stuck their tongues out.

“Well obviously that will have to wait. I have classes to get to and you two should go sleep. I’d rather not have you dead when I want to talk to you.”

“Aw really.” Ethan pouted.

“Yeah but we’ll talk later just get some sleep god knows you need it.”

“Alright. I’ll see you later y/n.”

“See yah Ethan.” You hung up and stared straight forward before a squeal left your lips and you clutched your only form of contract to your chest.

Your phone which had all the space you could want, but more importantly the skin which had kept you sane all this time.

anonymous asked:

can mod bethany shut up about her personal issues? She always brings her shit into things.every day its some new problem

Okay, fuck you. This blog belongs to Mod Bethany, and she puts so much into this blog so she can vent if she wants to. This blog isn’t just for our followers, it’s for us too. Don’t like it, don’t follow. Good riddance.

-Mod Ches


Dear anon, 

Last night I had a mental breakdown because the stress of my upcoming finals got to me. The last straw was when my dog peed on my futon. I put her in her kennel while I cleaned everything up, but she was whining the whole time so I got a noise complaint, at which point I lost it. I spent the next six-ish hours coming to the conclusion that my dog is too high energy for me and maybe I should give her up. Today, I’m exhausted (crying for multiple hours takes effort). For now I’ve decided to keep my dog but keep evaluating if we’re a good match or not. If I can’t take care of her and if she’s not giving me the emotional support I need (she’s an emotional support animal), then the best thing for both of us would be to take her back to the shelter. It’s a tough decision. 

Sincerely, 

We’ll talk about whatever we want seeing as how it’s our blog and not yours

Mod Marie-Rose

bodyguard!Seventeen: Vocal Unit

find vixx (here)
find hip hop unit (here

Jeonghan 

  • smiles while twisting some dirtbags wrist
  • gives you a thumbs up after he’s “disposed” of a threat 
  • always has this serene aura around him even in the most panicked situations like you have never seen him lose his cool he always looks so professional and collected
  • wears his hair in a ponytail when it was long and after cutting it he just clips it back and it’s ,,,,, so cute ,,, 
  • will hold a grudge for 20000 years if someone hurts you like he. will. not. forget. 
  • playfully jokes around with you by keeping silent when you ask him something and you’ll be like “jeonghan? jeonghan are you asleep?” and when you get close to his face he opens his eyes and just very calmly kisses you and goes “boo” (but only when no one else is around)
  • has an unexpected amount of power when he’s really really mad like if someone hurts you, he suddenly gains the strength of like a horse and literally other guards have to keep him back 

Joshua 

  • tries to keep you on-time and on-schedule and literally has every part of your day memorized
  • and all the other bodyguards are like dude you’re not her assistant or planner and joshua’s like aS bodyGUARDS our DUTY should BE TO KEEP eVERything safe and ORDERLY 
  • and sometimes like the other bodyguards are like hey doesn’t it kinda annoy you but you’re like what no it’s so endearing im actually so thankful
  • and tbh you once said that to josh you were like “without you, i would be a mess” and joshua like nearly fainted from overheating on the spot 
  • carries like napkins and medicine and like i dont know an extra blanket with him just in case of emergencies and like it melts your heart he’s always so attentive to you and sweet 
  • he once got sick but refused to leave work until you sat him down and ordered him to get some rest and put your hand to his forehead to feel his temperature and he was like aHHHHH on the inside because you’re touching him is THis wORK APPROpriATE 

Woozi 

  • gets underestimated but then everyone learns that he can pack a punch so they’re like oH and keep their mouths shut 
  • wears the same, grumpy expression most of the time and it’s hard to read him because he is literally always grumbling about something 
  • every other bodyguard always has a weapon on hand somewhere but woozi is just like “my fists of anger will be enough”
  • you caught him once tippy-toeing to reach for something and you were like he’s so cute but you said it outloud and woozi turned around and knocked the thing he was trying to get down and it hit his head and he was like oW and you were like omf im sorry and went to help him and he was just like i G T G and ran off 
  • you were like ???? but woozi was in the other room like talking to himself like no no they didn’t call you cute no no you’re not cute woozi you’re intIMIDATINg as HELL 
  • but he actually secretly is soft and watches you from the corner of his eye when you’re busy and notices little subtle thing that make him smile
  • the rest of the bodyguards see him smile and they’re like oh he’s human but then woozi frowns at them and they’re like sHIT HE CauhgT US wE ARE DeAD 

DK

  • the sweet shining sunlight of your life who also sometimes, rarely though, puts bad people into chokeholds…….
  • shows up to work in the button down and slacks and the other bodyguards are like !!!! where’s the rest of your suit/??/? and dk’s like “oh i passed someone on the street that needed a blanket so i gave my jacket to them ^^ this is ok right??” and before the bodyguards can say anything you’re like “it’s fine. it’s perfect” and DK is like thank you so much ^^ 
  • shows you dog memes on his phone during like boring conversations and the other guards are like put your phone away but you’re like nAH show me more dog videos
  • for the most part in dangerous situations he actually despises using violence and he usually tries to talk it out with the person bothering you, usually just politely asking them to leave and rethink saying or doing something stupid
  • but in those scenarios where someone doesn’t want to listen DK loses the smile and is like “I don’t want to do this but-” and well KO 
  • likes to playfully tickle you or ruffle your hair when it’s just the two of you and you’re always like !!! stop why!!! and he’s like idk i just wanted to touch you hehe,,, 

Seungkwan

  • good aim with a weapon, but an even better talent is his ability to hit high notes like his voice never fails to amaze you
  • always getting calls from his mom during press conferences or when you’re going somewhere and the other guards are like silence your phone but you’re like it’s his mom seungkwan you can answer it tell her i say hello
  • and seungkwan is always so thankful to you because you’re so sweet and considerate and tbh when you’re not around he’s like mom mom listen im in love- 
  • tries to be ‘cool’ by saying things like “looks like it’s time to kick ass o’clock” when he has to deal with someone difficult and you wanna giggle at how cheesy it is and seungkwan’s like nO you can’t laUGH it’s supposed to be cool im supposed to be like james bond 
  • he also has this like obsession with making sure you’re always covered as in like he’s always giving you his jacket or passing you a big scarf to put over your legs if you’re wearing something that comes up above the knee or if you have something without sleeves and you’re like seungkwan please and he’s like what if you get cold. whAT IF?????? 
  • but it could also be because he doesn’t like the look other guards or people are giving you because seungkwan is like extra protective of you 
  • i mean he told his mom he kinda loves you SO 
Beach {OPEN}

Simon was pretty pleased with himself actually. The new pattern with Jace, of waking him every time and just talking, was really helping with the nightmare situation. Sleep was coming easier and better now. Some parts of his life were still fucking complicated but that wasn’t likely to change and aside from the fucking slavery shit, he could live with most of it.

He sat against the beach log and lit a cigarette as Valentine ran in and out of the waves. The dog was growing up beautifully, even Jace approved, especially after Valentine found him on the beach when he was injured. They still had their moments, especially now that Valentine was so much bigger than Jace and still growing, but it was coming together nicely.

He was so lost in these thoughts that he didn’t notice the person approaching until Valentine barked and ran over to greet them. “Oh shit, sorry, want me to put him on his  leash?” Simon offered as he stood up.

craftywritelovessimblr  asked:

You don't have to answer these if you don't want to. I seriously feel like I'm probably your most annoying follower right now. I promise I'm not creepy I'm just super awkward.😛 Anyway! 16,17,30 and 60 for guess who Levi and Archer. You don't have to answer all of the questions for both if you don't want to. You don't even have to answer all the questions if you don't want to!

Quite the contrary!! You’re definitely one of my favorite followers *HUGE HUGS* because you put up with my shit & sat through so much of it all at once ;-; Thank you for asking!!

Keep reading

University!Winwin AU

•so like he’s a foreign student from China of course
•no one really knows why he’s there since his life in China was great and everything
•I mean what could get better than dancing half naked on a stage while wearing a leaf skirt
•of course Winwin is majoring in Performing Arts
•like the dancing part
•basically he learns about the history of dances from different countries and tries to prefects them
•which happen 99% of the time
•still doesn’t get why the whip and nae nae are chosen for America
•shows up to most of his classes unless he over sleeps
•the professors could never stay mad at him for it and help him catch up
•pretty focus on the school life tbh
•I mean he has a part time job at a cafe but now is not the time for me to explain that
•roommates with Kun of course, another Chinese transfer student
•mostly talk to each other in Chinese and everyone around the is like ‘wtf’
•secretly talking about girls and no one has any idea that their doing it
•since their apartment does allow pets, he and Kun take care of a little puppy
•contacts his parents a lot
•they also send him a lot of money because it sounds like something they would do
•now let’s get to the part where you come in
•so you’re also a student at the same university and you first met when you were walking your dog
•Winwin was also walking his dog •put them both together and bam, you have your first meeting
•your dog went up to his dog and sniffed it’s butt and that began a new friendship for the dogs
•you and Winwin say ‘hi’ and that’s like it •maybe introducing yourself but that much farther than that
•blame Kun
•he was the one that interrupted your meeting by calling Winwin to go buy milk or some shit
•of course Winwin listens because he’s a smol little puppy
•you meet again when your buying coffee and it turns out that he was at the cash register at that time
•'aren’t you the one dude from the dog park?’
•'umm….. yes? By the way do you want whip cream on that?’
•awkward moment #1
•not meeting again until you guys find out that you’re actually in the same class
•don’t blame me for not knowing him sooner, it’s not my fault that the class was always packed and took place in a huge auditorium
•everyone was paring up for a project and since you and Winwin kinda knew each, y'all paired up
•your professor (Yixing 😊) set it up so you would have to do some sort of couple traditional dance
•you would both blush of course but agree to do it anyways
•spending a lot of more time with each other and getting to know each other well during practice
•hanging out when practice is over with Kun sometimes
•taking your dogs out on play dates
•both denying that you guys are dating because a)you guys are both shy and b)no one officially asked the other one yet
•when it’s time for the final performance y'all slayed
•him getting all excited and kissing you on the cheek
•cue tomato faces on the both of you
•Kun yelling ‘I called it!!!’
•like boi, everyone called it
•finally you guys are official
•your dogs like that too
•and now you have a boyfriend to walk you to class and hang out with you after

God I love animals

Ive always had dogs or cats in my house. So I was crying earlier. My cat neko, who normally avoids everyone, started meowing, so I went to calm him. I cuddled him, after a bit I let him go. He came right back over, jumped up onto my lap and put his paws on my shoulders do he could give me a kiss on the nose.

God I love him.

And before that all four of my dogs smothered me when I went up crying. They gave me lots of kisses and it was great.

And my other cat Toby brought me his favorite toy when I was crying.

Holy shit I love my animals. Who needs anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds when you have cats and dogs. I love them so much just aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Boy in the bath


Author ladyoftheteaandblood.

One shot. If you want to know how bad my mind gets at 1 am this will let you know. I would like to apologize now.


It was one of those great parties, you know the kind that start in the pub and wonder on to someone’s house. They go on into the wee small hours and beyond, and only end when everyone has found a place to crash. 

You meet new people and have conversations about everything and nothing. You dance to records and CDs from someone’s collection that contains gems from the past, and music that perhaps should have been left there. Who cares its fun, and watching your best mate do the “Birdy song” dance with some suited and booted idiot was pure joy, especially as you took photos.

Now its 4am and all you can hear is snoring, as every chair and tuft of carpet is covered in sleepy bodies, sprawled out all over the place. There is only the occasionally laugh and the sound of lovers comes from a bedroom and that’s it.

On this particular occasion I was last man/girl standing and now even I needed a spot to crash but first a pee!

Wow! I stepped into a beautiful, old fashioned Victorian bathroom that had room enough to have its own party in.  I sat myself on the loo and sigh with relief, five bottles of lager and whatever that blue stuff was, have finally got to the bottom. 

“Er hum” came a voice from somewhere in the room, I came out my happy, dreamy state very quickly

“What, who?Oh shit!”  I hadn’t looked around properly when I’d come in and there in the bath was a man. It’s amazing how quickly you can sober up!

The guy lay there grinning at me. Me sitting on the loo with my fashionable jeans round my ankles, doing what I had to do. Worse still he was not some guy you wouldn’t look twice at, he was hot, really amazingly hot.



“Hi, needed to pee.” Wow no shit Sherlock, great opening line.

“Um I can see, sorry I hid in here and sort of forgot somebody might need it” He then laughed with embarrassment.

“Well look away Mr and I’ll ……….do what I came to” 

He was at least a gentleman and allowed me to finish the job, not even looking  as I wash my hands. 

He only turned to me again as he heard the door open.

“Hey pretty lady don’t go, stay and talk, I’m guessing everyone else is asleep now and I’m full of life again.” I looked at the lean figure in the bath that for some strange reason, known only to himself  had on his boots and sunglasses. He removed the glasses  and gave me a really cheeky smile with blue eyes that twinkled. Oh what harm could it do I thought.

So sitting on the side of the bath at his feet end as I felt it was safer, we started to talk. Why had I not seen him at the party? Was my first question

“Well I never arrived till late and stayed mostly outside smoking, watching and I’ll most likely be gone before daylight” 

He doesn’t smell of smoke. In fact the smell coming from him is divine and very, come give me a hug but I am drunk and therefore my senses are not to be trusted.

As I shifted to a more comfy position, I manage to knock down something from the baths side. Picking it up I find it’s a garden gnome.

“Wow creepy little fellow”

“Yup they’re all over the place” he says happily. 

Looking around I can see he’s right, how did I not notice the hoards of  nasty little gnomes in this room before?. 

They’re in all the corners, on the windowsills, the cabinet tops, under the bath, peeping out the laundry basket and all round the taps, just staring at me, with their hairy faces and beady eyes. Sinister little fuckers.

“Oh God I hate gnomes, they always seem like they are watching you, checking out your every move, just waiting to get you with their mind control thing.” I said to him, childhood bad dreams of attacking killer gnomes from next door’s garden resurfacing.

“Wow! and I thought the little shits were just perverted deviants, into Dogging” we  both giggled, and he carried on,

“I can handle an innocent rubber duck in my bathroom as much as the next guy but these fellow’s with their horrid hairiness and dreadful fashion  sense, weird me out”

Those Gnomes had to go, so for the next ten minutes the two of us, me still mostly drunk, collected them all up and placed them in the bath, turning on the taps.

We told each other it was either to put them out of their misery, or wreck  their communication devices. Their little faces looked at us through the water and didn’t seem so happy.

“That’s it, that’s the last one” he told me as he place a particularly ugly gent in a tartan suit and spotty socks, with the others in to their watery grave

“Shit! no it isn’t, there’s one more above the linen cupboard” He shields me from its steely gaze with his body then said,

“Quick make out you are kissing me, I think he’s rumbled us” at which point he grabbed me by the waist and pulled me to him into a warm lingering, tongue roaming kiss, with his large hands wandering gently over my back and neck.  He sure did taste as divine as he smelt.

Kisses continued and turn into playful touching, going on to clothes removal and ending up with a bolted bathroom door, and a satisfying shag on the towels and floor mat. 

Curled up in a makeshift bed of bathroom linen and discarded clothes, we both noticed that the last repulsive gnome standing was a grinning one.

“Well we’ve made his night, that’s not a fishing rod he’s holding” my new companion informed me.

Giggling and feeling contented from booze and cuddles, we both fell asleep in a  tangled pile of arms and legs.


I woke up freezing cold and aching, the floor was hard and boy was my body complaining. 

Someone was banging on the door.

“Come on I need a piss, there’s a bloody queue out here”

I looked round for my  bath buddy but he’d gone and strangely all the disturbing short guys in their terrible outfits, had made it back out the bath and were back in place. They looked at me from their various posts, creepy and threatening as ever. 

Grabbing my clothes and pulling them on, I left the room as soon as possible. I ignored the comments from the people outside the door and went off down stairs in search of my mate I’d originally come with, and more importantly the sexy guy.

She was in the kitchen with many others, holding hot cups of black coffee in the vain hope they would revive them and relieve their throbbing heads.

“Hey you, where did you go?” She asked

“Found a friend in the bathroom if you get my drift” 

“Well where is he, or was it one of those hideous little gnomes I saw in there last night? I always knew you were weird.” She laughed at me

“He was here. He was all tall and sexy, dark haired, some facial hair, white T-shirt jeans and sunglasses. Oh and boots, I found him in the bath” 

“No one here like that I’ve seen, how much did you have to drink last night?” and she went over to get the toast that had just popped up from the toaster, making everyone round it jump.

I started too asked around and all I got was a big no, except from the host who went white and refused to talk to me.

It was as we left that the host’s boyfriend came up to me looking really angry.

“Bloody nasty trick to play on her, she only lost her brother a year ago yesterday. The party was supposed to take her mind off it. He somehow drowned in the bath, it was terrible and she found him.

Then you go and tell her he’s still in there with those bloody gnomes he use to nick from people’s gardens, how could you?”

“But there was a guy in there” I splutter, “really”

“Oh just piss off” 

We left quickly, my friend angrily dragging me away.  I looked back at the house as I went down the path, and just in the corner of the bathroom window was a creepy little gnome in a tartan suit grinning at me.

@angreav @anovinebo @angryschnauzer @peskipixi @booksandcatslover @munchkin80 @jdmookami @clojury @eve1978 @snugglyhiddles @the-haven-of-fiction @ladywyldfire @vampirewithbedsidemanners @heathermc13 @ancientfinnishgoddess @damageditem @tomforachange @oeffsee @ourladybinxthings @itsnerdgirl6044 @servent-alearika @siyoteodiara @tinaferraldo @feelmyroarrrr @fellowhiddlestoner @quoting-shakespeare-to-ducks @antyc67 @aggro-femme @prplprincez @lovehiddlesbatch @hisfireandblood @lolawashere @tomkurbikston @tomhiddleston-kikibfairy @tom-hiddlestonhq @lostinspace33 @jossisgod @yourdarksideisshowing @hotchpotch53 @larouau12

picture not mine I just played with it and the gif found on the tumblr nice app thing

why I love bangtan

Jin: - his goddam adorable laugh like holy shIT - his loVE OF FOOD it never ceases to amaze me - he is very very beautiful and nobody can tell me otherwise because he literally trended on twitter for stepping out of a car Yoongi: - he is NOT lazy he is so damn hardworking i will fight you on this - his gummy smile that can flourish crops and clear acne - he has been through so much and here he is, mixtape out, 6 loving friends/members, a cute-ass dog named Min Holly, and just all around amazing Hoseok: - his contagious smile can light up anybody’s day - he is always trying to cheer up other members and puts them first (you are important too darling, don’t forget that please) - he is sUCH A GOOD DANCER HOLY SHIT IT’S LIKE WATCHING ANGELS Namjoon: - his love of literature is so admirable like he is always reading - diMPLES PLeaSE - looks good in LITERALLY any hairstyle ever??? Like his hair at some point was dyed bright firetruck red and it still looked hella fine Jimin: - he is just so cute??? His cheeks and his smile eyes and his little crooked tooth and honey please don’t go on another diet you don’t need abs - his heavenly voice is sent from god. Those hiGH NOTES MURDER ME - he always does his best to make sure the other members are feeling okay and makes sure they are safe Taehyung: - his eyes and smile and when he wears bandanas i just die a little bit cause he is literally hot and adorable at the same time???? (not to mention he is Gucci AF) - his deep voice yet somehow still able to hit that high note in Stigma like D A M N - he is such a treasured part of the team and has so many hidden talents like saxophone, drawing, skills in high heels, and looking stylish in ANYTHING HE WEARS Jungkook: - his voice is just the most beautiful thing it’s like a sunday morning and birds are chirping and you can smell coffee downstairs - meme king™ and it’s wonderful - he deals with the pressure of being the maknae very well and he really tries his hardest and he’s just so good feel free to add more y'all sorry for the long post 💛💛💛 - happy 4th anniversary, BTS -

Originally posted by saliechelon255

anonymous asked:

are you still taking prompts? because FS + '...why is there a dog in our bathtub?'

rated a light T, i think. also dedicated to the sandpenis group chat <3

More often than not, Jemma Simmons prides herself on her lifelong history of waking up before everyone else around her. It allows a blissful moment or two of calm solitude before the storm of whatever the day could bring. She’s done it for years, but many of these personal moments were lost rather than found with the storms turning into hurricanes as her ever-changing world grew more and more dangerous.

But, here and now? In a little cottage in Perthshire, not too big and not too small and without the weight of the world on her shoulders, her favorite pre-morning ritual involves Fitz, her other half who, though the path has been a jagged one, has stood by her side in the eye of even the worst of storms. Even after their two years spent together together, Jemma still likes to take the time to memorize his sleeping face as calm and peaceful as she’s ever seen it, as if to counteract the monsoons it’s witnessed head on. 

So when she stirs from slumber with fluttering eyes and pointed toes, naturally she allows herself to bask in this quiet moment and simply take him in. He’s all messy curls and steady breaths and lashes longer than they have any right to be and hers and hers. She watches him for another five, ten, thirty seconds before giving in and pressing kisses along his jaw.

Fitz mumbles something incoherent, rolling to his side to chase the sensation. Chuckling softly, she starts kissing his cheeks and forehead and eyelids and the bridge and tip of his nose. He whines, blindly moves his face towards hers as best as he can with closed eyes to capture her lips with his lazily. 

“Morning,” she murmurs against him. Fitz echoes the word roughly; she lets out a little squeak when his fingers skim over her side and beneath his faded tee she stole long ago, and she gets the tiniest peek of blue in the morning light from his eyes just cracking open before he closes them again, tugs her flush against him. 

Jemma can’t fight her lips curving into a grin when his tongue grazes hers, even though it makes it much harder to kiss him; she rolls them over, sliding a leg between his and thumbing at his jaw, and she then decides exactly how she wants to spend this blissful early morning—when a sharp, high-pitched yelp jolts them both wide awake and all traces of arousal disappear.

Frozen, they wait just a beat. There it is again. And again.

It takes her much longer to put two and two together than she’s willing to admit. She sits up, half on his stomach. “Um.”

“Shit.” He tries to hide his face in the pillow but she pulls him out.

“Fitz? Um…why is there a dog in our bathtub?”

Peeking at her between his fingers covering his face, he groans and squeezes his eyes shut. “Well, it was supposed to be a surprise.” he lets out an oof as she clambers off of him and rolls off the bed and dashes to the bathroom. 

“See, the kennel made too much noise so I put him in here after you fell asleep, and the little bastard just passed right out too,” Fitz explains, stumbling after her. “I was gonna wake up early and put him in our bed, it was gonna be really romantic and heartwarming, but—” but she’s not listening at all, too preoccupied with cooing and giggling at the tiny, spotted puppy wiggling in her arms and licking at her face.

“Aww, Fitz!” Jemma manages out between laughs, noting the red and currently untied ribbon loose around his neck.

“He’s a rescue pup,” he informs her, smiling, “so the exact breed’s a bit of a mystery. Didn’t think you’d mind, though.”

“He’s perfect.” She shifts him to the crook of one arm and catches Fitz by the wrist. “C’mon, then. Let’s go pile up back in bed and pretend it happened the way you planned. Have to one-up me romantically and all that.”

And they do just that, curl up in bed with the newest member of the Fitz-Simmons household with kisses from every party involved. Fitz murmurs happy birthday against her mouth and the puppy intervenes by nipping at his jaw with both paws on his chest and Jemma cannot picture a better way to spend every early morning from here on out.

calmorrison  asked:

❤️ I don't remember if I sent u a heart or not whoops

you hadn’t but now you have so let’s get started in here. megan… when will i ever meet someone more iconic than you?? probably never. you’re not only super pretty (like damb your smile puts the sun to shame and it’s Tea!) you’re also really talented, you’re an incredible writer and i admire you because of that, the fact that you compliment my writing or encourage me makes me legit tear up because i think you’re one of the most talented writers i’ve ever encountered and so it makes my brain short circuit that u like me. thanks for being so awesome and for putting up with my shit and for sharing your typos with us, like if mug dog??? LEGENDS ONLY!!! queen of the typos, that is you. thanks so much for existing idk what it’d be of me without you in my life. ily ily ily so much and you deserve happiness and nice things. i love yooouuuuu!!!!!! ❤️

yikes

im so fucking tired. i wanna get home and play skyrim and cuddle the dog and hug my sister. i wanna write my dumb dragon story that i started yesterday. i wanna infodump to people about shit while also being coherent. i wanna sleep in my own nest again and actually set up pillows and another mattress so i can have a real nest. i wanna finally get my parents to buy a TV for my study/private recreation/dragon hoard room like they said they would. i wanna put my computer there too. i wanna have all my stuff where it should be, where it makes sense that it would be. i wanna organize and get my old bed the fuck out of my room. i wanna set my shit up. i wanna have at least some semblance of control over my life but no i’m in the car with three other people for far too long and listening to the minigame horse-race music from breath of the wild on repeat for the last four hours because i’m the worst

anonymous asked:

jerejean and the AU "we both got dragged to this strange party and you're the only other familiar face and normally I'd leave (or if jeremy, make friends) but I can't and this party sucks so let's hang out"

This would happen. THIS WOULD HAPPEN. This is going to become an angst fic. I hate you oh god here we go fellas

  • AU in which all of the universities are in the same state and the Trojans and Foxes are so close to each other Kevin can shove everyone into a van and take them to any Trojan-hosted party he conveniently finds out about on Facebook
  • So yeah while the mafia thing is sort of toned down, the Foxes and Ravens still kind have this THING where they HATE EACH OTHER mostly because of Kevin and Neil but who else would we blame.
  • So Riko finds out about Kevin frequenting Trojan parties and he’s like ‘Yes. This is it. This is my chance to make my big Entrance. They’re gonna be so impressed, time to fuck shit up.’
  • So he takes his squad of Ravens and invades the innocent Trojan party.
  • Jean is with him of course, because Jean is property.
  • However the thing about putting the Edgar Allen “let’s walk in V formation” Ravens into a room with the Trojans is that it’s literally like walking into a house full of loving dogs. 
  • The Ravens immediately scatter and by some turn of events it leaves Jean outside not really interested in much and kind of freaking out because he’s alone and isn’t used to being left with his own devices.
  • Enter Jeremy, team captain, party host, Captain Golden Retriever, out on a mission to clear these Ravens out of his house through sheer determination. (They’re easy to find all they wear is black.)
  • And then he finds Jean out on the back porch leaned up against the wall and is ABOUT to be like in the worlds most sunshiney tone, “You have to go.”
  • But then he recognizes Jean Moreau and the tattoo on his face, and remembers all those conversations he’d had with Kevin (and one really upsetting one with Neil that evening) and stops.
  • And instinctively he just slides right up and starts talking about their game against the Bearcats that they’re celebrating. Because. What else do you talk to a Raven about.
  • And Jean. Is just. What the fuck. Like he knows this person from games and stuff but he never expected to be noticed and talking about exy is actually really interesting???
  • And Jean starts grilling him about Bearcat techniques and Jeremy gets really dramatic about it and challenges all of Jean’s super technical analyses while Jean tries to get Jeremy to see the little things. 
  • And it gets really heated and eventually Jeremy accidentally forgets about the whole Ravens incident altogether because Jean is actually really interesting?? And has really nice opinions and has a good eye for detail and god Jeremy could talk about Exy ALL DAY wouldn’t that be fun?? 
  • Jean is kind of baffled but also intrigued by how into the conversation Jeremy is getting and it kind of makes him feel like he’s enjoying this too? 
  • He cracks a smile and suddenly it’s like the sky opened up and gave them the sun and Jeremy is just at a standstill like holy fuck how did I not notice this creature before.
  • But then everything goes to shit when Neil and Riko get into a physical fight and everything just goes downhill once Andrew tries to intervene and oh fuck, Jeremy has to go because NOT AT HIS PARTY, ASSHOLES
  • And he tells Jean goodbye and that he’s looking forward to seeing him at more games and gives him one of his thousand watt grins before leaping into the fight and physically pulling people apart.
  • And Jean is. Just. Kind of.
  • Still.
  • And out of breath.
  • (Also the sight of Jeremy singlehandedly disengaging a Foxes vs Ravens fight is kind of a turn on tbh)
  • (Kevin’s not sure whether to be embarrassed of his team or turned on.)

Send me an au/hc and a pairing and I’ll write my headcanons for it!