Nostalgia: Sentimentality of the Past
My mom and dad greeted me with their warmest smiles as I head to the counter. They were planning an “Exclusive Family” day activity as number one on their itinerary list.
Obviously, they’re trying to keep an enthusiastic front and acting weird ever since I came back from the city. “How are you honey?” My dad asked and squeezed my hand. “Better than ever, Daddy” I answered briefly unsure if that is really the answer to his query. “Would you mind if I take a walk and have a quiet time at the hill?” I asked so as to change the course of the discussion. They glanced at each other with an approving look. “Of course you can darling, you have plenty of time.” My mom answered. “Thanks… Mom, Dad, I’m fine…really.” I kept my voice as convincing as possible and hugged them both.
It was a beautiful sunny day. People are busy chatting with friends like they’ve never seen each other in years. Others are laughing their hearts out, some kids are happily playing like they’re having the time of their lives. I’m wearing my white spaghetti-strapped, above-the-knee dress with a yellow detail on the lining, paired with my mustard strappy sandals. I managed my shoulder length brunette hair with my natural locks as it is, spared my cheek with a little blush and kept my pink lip gloss on.
I climbed up on a small hill not far from the village. I always come here whenever I’m back from the city. This place has been my childhood safe-place and surprisingly it still works for me now. I love the serenity it brings and the melodious song of the birds hopping from one tree to another. I sat on the bench under the huge old Oak tree. It’s branches and leaves are plenty enough to cover the whole bench giving the place it’s shady, cool and relaxing ambiance. I leaned down on it’s trunk to have a clearer view of the perfect blue sky.
“This is home!” I exclaimed in pure amazement. “This is what life is supposed to be, calm and peaceful.” The wind is whipping past my face. I suddenly felt the need to close my eyes. “You are the best thing that ever happened to my life.” He whispered these words to me while I rest my head on his chest, his arms around me, I can feel his warm breath on my hair, and one hand caressing my face. I opened my eyes and realized it was another random thought.
Ironic it is that the fact that I love the soothing peace that this place brings, it also brings back memories of the past that I keep myself from thinking. It is when I’m alone and feeling contented that feeling of emptiness is starting to consume me.
It is a war in my mind. A battlefield, more like an arena. And even if I try to fight the idea with every nerve in my body, I always end up battered and weak. Without a split second, the clock rolled back and I’m back seven years ago.