think about how worthless you are

Thank you

I just want to give a shoutout to these people who made me so happy these last few days when all i felt was worthless…

@edjjr0401 Juan for making me laugh so hard my sides hurt every single day. Discussing ways to kill jake paul has never been so fun my love! Thank you for being you.

@dolandreaming M for letting me know every single day that she’s thinking about me and loves me and is sending positivity my way. It warms my heart to think that someone who i met on this website who i only speak to through this website, actually thinks about me on a daily basis and cares about how I’m doing! Thank you for being you. 

@twininspiredwriting Katie for being there for me when i don’t even know what the hell I’m thinking. She always seems to find the right words when i have none. She understand the saddest parts of my soul and pulls them back to light. Thank you for being you.

@prettybabyhazza Eliza for being equally obsessed with every single social media star that i am. Making me feel a little less crazy as a 21 year old girl. Giving me that sassy loving that i know actually means you love the shit outta me. Making me smile every. single. day. Thank you for being you.

@exclnt Abbie for being my soul sister. Every day i find out how much more alike we are and its kinda scary but its really awesome at the same time. Now if only i was as funny as you! ever since meeting you, i swear i got abs from laughing so hard EVERY DAY. But then we can also have serious, deep, meaningful conversations that make us think. Its the best of both worlds. Thank you for being you. 

I’ve met a lot of wonderful people through this website. And i feel like i don’t say thank you enough. These are just some of the many people i feel like i need to thank. So Part 2, and 3, and probably 4 and 5 to this “thank you” post is coming, because i cannot thank you all enough for the smiles you bring to my face and i NEED you guys to know how special you all are to me. 

The whole “fake it ‘til you make it” thing about confidence is a cliche because it’s fucking true.  Literally how the hell do people think anyone got where they are today?  By just sitting around and waiting to become confident by some miracle?

You wanna be confident?  You wanna stop feeling worthless?

Start acting confident.  It’s gonna take a long fucking time, but that’s how it WORKS.  You GET confident by ACTING confident.  Because when you ACT confident, people think you ARE confident, and they TRUST you and RELY on you and BELIEVE in you more.  And because of all of that, you BECOME FUCKING CONFIDENT.

IT STARTS WITH YOU, AND YOU HAVE THE GODDAMN POWER TO DO IT.

STOP PUTTING YOURSELF DOWN.  START BEING CONFIDENT, AND BY GOD, START TODAY.

START THIS VERY INSTANT.

This post was triggered by something that @roachpatrol​ said over here about the expectation for girls to be sweet and clean and harmless:

Holy shit, if I was eight years younger and wandering into fandom for the first time, I can guarantee that the culture right now would’ve fucked me up and ground me down and taken away all my healthy outlets.

Picture: you are a girl at the tender young age of mumbledyteen. Up until this point you have been taught that all dark thoughts are literally hand-delivered into your head by the devil, and that the only correct method of dealing with negativity is to ignore them and pray harder. Concentrate on what is good and righteous and pure to the exclusion of all else, this is how you be a good person.

You are also a fully-functioning human being, one who can feel stressed or lonely or angry or any number of bad things. Mostly, with emotions that are still working themselves out, you feel this rumbling, white-hot white noise under everything, all the time. Sometimes it rolls in like a thunderstorm and everything else gets drowned out, and sometimes it’s only quietly muttering in the distance. Either way it’s always there, and the sound shreds uncomfortably at the inside of your brain.

When you were younger, before you were in charge of your own media consumption, your brain would shred up a myriad of saccharine stories to try and match the noise of the shredder in your head. Bad things happening, people getting hurt, characters trapped in unhealthy relationships of all kinds.

Fanfiction, the product of a hundred thousand other mumbledyteens whose brains are all screaming the same way, makes something in your brain go ping

Unfortunately, if the planet had ever been united on any single message, it was probably that no matter how you feel: 1) your feelings weren’t unique 2) they didn’t matter 3) they didn’t matter because they weren’t unique, they were shared among millions of hysterical, worthless teenaged girls just like you.

Fandom was confirmation of the first, but (with some hiccups along the way) outright rejection of the last two. Fuck you, our feelings do matter, and this is a story just for us.

A disclaimer: these aren’t good stories, otherwise they wouldn’t have to be defended. Their flavor of topic is not within societally acceptable bounds. Fictional characters have sex and get tortured and raped and abused, but their screaming harmonizes with the pitch of the shredder when it’s burrowing deepest.


As a teenager I never thought that my feelings were important enough to deal with, but these stories let me look at them sideways. Audience catharsis is the whole point of tragedy, after all.

And hell, these days I’m a happy, healthy adult who barely even has the urge to go looking for whump fic when I’ve had a bad week. I’m not going to forget just how much bad stuff that fic helped me air out, though, not ever. (Not to mention that thanks to all of those abuse!fics, I can recognize an unhealthy relationship at 500 paces, even if the fictional abuse was depicted as something loving and romantic. Abusers in real life don’t go around with helpful warning tags on their sleeves anyway.)

But holy shit, can you imagine if I’d found fandom as it is today.

Yes, your church is right, your family is right. Horrible things in stories are only there because they were written by horrible people, and they’re only popular because horrible people read them. The very concepts they address corrupt everything they touch.

That shredder in your head, the one that takes innocent cartoons but then shits out sadness and mayhem? That’s disgusting, you’re disgusting. How dare you think about minors having underaged sex, you minor? How dare you consider another person getting hurt? Your feelings don’t matter, they aren’t unique, they’re shared with all kinds of worthless shitbags just like you.

Every ounce of what you read and write and enjoy is going to be weighed for sin and tested for purity. You know, just like the rest of your life, except this time there’s no deity who’s handing out second chances.

Maybe that’s what bothers me most about all of this. It’s the same petty fandom bullshit as always, but “you’re wrong for liking a ship because IT WILL NEVER BE CANON” is a hell of a lot easier to laugh off when you’re young than “you’re wrong for liking a ship because YOU’RE AN ABUSIVE PEDOPHILE AND IF SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS IT’S YOUR FAULT FOR PERPETUATING IT.”

My fault, my bad thoughts, no outlet for any of them. The message to repress all the bad things so I can look like a good person, but my brain is so full of unprocessed shit that it’s solidified. Nobody actually saved any real children, but my brain sure is getting a second dose of fucked-up.

Are the people getting attacked going to be okay, will they be able to go and address their braingremlins somewhere else? I’d also ask if the people doing the attacking are okay, with all of the denial and repression they must deal with, but it seems like they’ve got venting pretty well handled by taking it out on strangers. 

Hey, c’mon, calm down friends. I bet I’ve read a story that’s got a character screaming at just the same pitch you are.

It helps to read one of those and harmonize your voices, I promise.

do you guys ever sit there and think about how extra tony stark is?

like this man literally took the shrapnel that was wedged inside his chest and made a necklace out of it for the love of his life?

who does shit like that?

he could’ve easily gotten her a diamond necklace worth more than a house, but instead, he gets pepper an essentially worthless necklace that literally holds all the meaning in the world. tony is legit giving pepper his heart. you can’t get deeper than that. you can’t love deeper than that.

fuck you and your sentimentality, tony. you big bad villain.

why does nobody ever talk about how the belief of “romance is the top priority” is so toxic and dangerous? how it causes more harm than good?

this doesn’t even just affect aromantic people. this belief harms anyone and everyone.

there are people that literally believe their life has no point because they don’t have a significant other. there’s mentally ill/neurodivergent people that think they’re worthless and meaningless and disgusting because they can’t find someone who wants to date them, even if they’re showered with love from their friends and/or family. but the love only counts if it’s romantic, right?

society is constantly perpetuating the idea that you were born to find a romantic partner and that romance is the only way to be truly happy, and it’s so messed up. this completely disregards other great moments in life, like personal achievements that make you feel like you’re on top of the world and the things nobody glorifies simply because it’s not romance.

your pet(s) pulling a smile out of you every time you see them. having a deep, emotional talk with a friend and being reminded that someone cares about you. enjoying alone time with yourself. reaching a milestone or getting through a hard time. these things are so wonderful and amazing, but it’s not romance, so it doesn’t matter, right? it’s boring and insignificant.

and it really shows when questions like “do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend yet?” and “have you settled down with someone yet?” are asked. it shows how society thinks romance is the most important thing to experience in life. the “yet” implies that romance is a requirement, that you’ll have to find it eventually. but what if you don’t want to? if you simply aren’t interested in that stuff right now or if you won’t ever be interested?

romance is not everything. remember that. you were not born to “find someone” or to “have a soulmate”. you don’t need romance in your life for it to be a good one. you are allowed to not include it in your priorities. it doesn’t matter if nobody has a crush on you or wants to date you. it literally doesn’t matter. that has absolutely no importance to your worth as a human being. you were not brought into this world to impress and find a potential mate. you’re here to live and to do what makes you happy.

romance can be nice, but it is not everything. please, please remember that.

anonymous asked:

How can I tell if I'm actually going through emotional abuse and not just being overemotional?

well, here’s a few signs:

  • if you are scared of somebody 
  • if they call you names, invalidate your feelings, apologize insincerely for upsetting you, or manipulate you
  • if somebody has ever called you “worthless”, “useless”, “good for nothing”, or any other variation of telling you that you don’t have value
  • if you think about all your actions in words in terms of “will this make them mad at me” because they tend to get mad over small things
  • if you feel like you have to change your demeanor and personality to suit them because otherwise they’ll be angry
  • if you can’t set up boundaries like “take time to cool down when you’re mad so you don’t call me names”
  • if you don’t have a space that is just yours for at least some time during each day because they invade it
  • if you fear they will go through your phone, diary, journal, etc
  • if you are asking “am i being emotionally abused” that’s also a pretty big indicator that you are
  • someone: you were pretty good at that thing, why'd you stop doing it?
  • me internally: I get extremely anxious when I think about doing something I might possibly succeed at because I base my self-worth on my achievements and other people's approval, I am afraid because I know I will never be able to live up to my own unrealistic expectations, I hate making mistakes because they make me feel worthless, I take negative feedback too personally, I feel immense guilt over not doing things that I've been avoiding which just makes me avoid them more, I feel ashamed and inadequate due to how difficult it is for me to stay committed to anything, I'm worried that I'll just end up disappointing myself and the entire world, and I am convinced that if I failed I would literally die.
  • me externally: idk i guess i've just been kinda busy lol
I’m sorry I could never be the daughter you wanted

Okay. So #studyblrs get real isn’t trying to offend anyone. I’ve gotten some anon messages that are really rude and I’ve just straight up deleted them.

#studyblrs get real is just that, we’re getting real. I’ve rewritten my notes to be aesthetically pleasing one time. Uno. Ein. Yeah that’s the only languages I know one in.

The studyblr aesthetic isn’t most people’s real life studies methods. It’s some people’s, and I want to congratulate those who manage to keep the aesthetic up.

But honestly, it’s not real life. Real life is being up at 2 AM, surrounded by four empty cups, Rice Krispies Treat wrappers, and a pizza box with just pizza crust in it, and grease marks on your paper. Real life is not having time to make these AMAZING and GORGEOUS notes, because you’re studying for the grade, NOT the notes.

People say you just need to “study” to be a studyblr, but why is it only the MUJIs, the Mildliners, and the Staedtlers get reblogged? Why doesn’t the pictures of sloppy, coffee stained notes get reblogged? The rain drenched crinkled notes that don’t get rewritten. The notes with more scribbles than legible writing.

Underneath is why I think that #studyblrs get real needs to become popular, and fast, which has been taken from what I said in a conversation with @universi-tea where the idea for #studyblrs get real came up.

Teens that are growing up may not know what they’re facing, because aesthetic studyblr makes it look like sunshine and lollipops.

“I’ve been through things that will commonly happen. I’ve been rejected by my dream school, and I’ve cried at 4 AM in the morning because my fourth SAT scores weren’t high enough to meet requirements after months of studying. I’ve taken AP classes. I’ve graduated.

Your high school/college/university experience may have been different, but mine was a rude awakening and I’m trying to prevent others from crashing and burning like I did. I was an all A student in high school, even with AP classes. I graduated fifth in my class with 25 credits from AP scores, in which my school only offered seven AP classes.

My first test in uni was a 38 in Business Calculus. A fucking 38 out of 100. I remember it very vividly (Thursday night, and the Blacklist was on.) It was like someone was trying play a joke on me because I had NEVER gotten that low of a test grade before. I remember looking at my scores, and the sense of dread settling into the pit of my stomach. I cried, and then called my old AP Bio teacher (idk why now that I think about it) I had a panic attack, and I was by myself (lived alone.) Those two are very dangerous. My next test score was a 51. Rinse, and repeat.

Do you know how worthless I felt? How long my mom yelled at me after I called her? How my friends reacted when they found out? I went and had a four hour conversation with the professor, who told me that this was the most common thing he saw in a class with freshmen in it. That they come thinking that they’re prepared and they are by no means prepared. I had to go to tutoring. For every single class but one. This was so fucking embarrassing. I had gone from the tutor in HS to the tutored in Uni.

My best friend went to the North Carolina School of Math and Science. Extremely prestigious, and extremely hard. “It’s like taking uni classes when you’re 16, 17, and 18, but you don’t get credit for them as college classes.” I’ve known my best friend since I was 10-ish. She’s the most level headed, and the smartest person I know. She calls me frequently, crying, because the work load. She spent a whole week with me trying to get over one failing grade.

This embarrassment, this shame and lack of self worth I experienced in uni is something I NEVER want ANYONE to experience. I’m trying to prevent these people younger than I am from feeling this way, because I had sunk into a depression because of grades. Grades that could’ve been prevented, had I known the truth.

Sure, the studyblr aesthetic may work in some people’s lives, but in college/uni, you’re being pulled in so many directions. I don’t know of a single person in any of my classes that have gorgeous notes. Hell, I don’t know anyone who can even afford to buy nice planners, or buy fresh fruit. Being “a broke college student” is entirely legit.

But all this aside, if you’ve managed to live out the studyblr aesthetic in university and keep up your grades, you better be DAMN proud of yourself. I’m not trying to make anyone mad. This is the reality most of us experience. It’s the honest truth, and I had to find out the hard way. I just don’t want anyone else to find out the hard way, either.“

Listen, being a fanfic writer is the weirdest thing. You write alone, building a world in your brain, seeming like a normal crazy person in this large world. But then you post the story and it’s like a revelation. The gates of heaven and hell open simultaneously and you’re left in a dilemma because you are the focus of a thousand eyes and you are the focus of a thousand eyes. You might not even be using your given name and might be the most ignored person in the ‘outside world’ but in the space of your laptop screen and that story, you become some sort of a fairy godmother who grants the deepest wishes of people craving more stories. 

Then you come onto Tumblr or some other site where fandoms hound, where you meet other people. Some of them turn out to be writers who have made you weep into your sodden pillow at 3 a.m. because of a 11 chapter fic. You feel like a termite in comparison to them and stare intensely at their blogs every day, creating wondrous imaginations about how they might be. There are pedestals for gods and then there are thrones for these mere mortals who are immortal in your opinion. You have hated the kudos button for restricting your love for them. You don’t dare to look them in the eye or chat with them.

And then one day they reblog one of your posts or like it or do something equally simple. You hear angels cry and have endless internal screaming chants, with a few tears trickling down your cheeks. You think you have achieved nirvana. Is there anything more to do in this worthless hellsite life, you wonder. What more could you ask for?

So you try to act mature and think you have made a fool of yourself.

Turns out, they’re equally pathetic as you and have been gushing over your work as well.

You learn quickly that you’re all on the same boat and that moment, that moment of realization is when you understand why words are magic and writers are ridiculously human.

Fanfic writers are the most attention seeking, tired, annoyed, dorky people and anyone who thinks that they are people you need to admire from a distance needs to try having a chat once. You’ll find the resemblance of lost puppies or old cats.

June 24th/25th, 2017 Horoscope
  • Aries: The home bustles with more than busy bodies, Aries. You're likely at odds with the head of the household, letting ego rule over the mind, body and soul, and at this especially sensitive time, it can wreck havoc.
  • Taurus: The current is slow and steady, and the foreboding feeling of something being just beyond the horizon gnaws at you. What awaits?
  • Gemini: Materialism gnaws at you more than usual. The feeling of having to own everything goes against your more minimalistic nature. However, these consumerist craves won't die down until you've made a crazy impulse buy. Just remember - the experiences soon to be knocking on your doorstep are much more valuable than the item that'll sit on your nightstand collecting dust.
  • Cancer: I can sum up your day in a single word: Overwhelming. Try to refrain from letting the busyness of life and the dramas that await bog you down.
  • Leo: You, too, are overwhelmed. Feelings of confusion and deceit are at prime time, let alone obsession. Unhealthy partners, especially in sex-based relationships, are seeking you out as prey - don't fall victim to their nasty tricks, and always use protection (and/or contraception, depending on personal beliefs).
  • Virgo: Your love life has been shaken up, however, it's quite dreamy. You're finding more than friends at parties, and the people in your life seem to just... bring benefits. But, dear Virgo, remember: not all of those who promise will deliver.
  • Libra: Your emotions bring up feelings of pain and worthlessness, pushing against reality and bringing you down when it comes to the fun that happens around you. Feelings of lonliness may strive today, and sadly, may have been for a while.
  • Scorpio: You finally feel like committing and staying committed, and this is a big deal for you. However, with so much going on in your life bringing attention to politics, religion, and other metaphysical desires, you may want to use some of that introspection to think about who you're involved with, how they'll help you grow, and most importantly: is this person going to help you by supporting you, or by teaching you a lesson?
  • Sagittarius: The movements you make, despite them being against what you typically dabble in, will prove to be more useful that you have thought, Sag. Your efforts aren't going unnoticed, but don't forget - not all attention is positive, and not all good news benefits you in the end - especially when dealing with people, contacts, and legality.
  • Capricorn: Love, lust and pixie dust. Commitment is on the mind, but with the confusion twirling around your head, you may make some negligent romantic choices. Before getting involved with someone, really assess their character, because without such thought, it's almost promised it'll hurt you.
  • Aquarius: Anxiety has been eating away at you, and it isn't about to ease up. The news you got recently will finally hit you, or you'll get yours today. Feelings of confusion, loss, and worry are all common, and quite detrimental. Taking the day to do something relaxing, and avoiding others may be in your best interest, despite how unlikely it is you'll do so.
  • Pisces: You're having fun! This weekend is all about the best and the brightest star, and you want to be there and be involved. You'll meet new people, take up new passions, and find new pleasures. However, there may be feelings of paranoia that you aren't dealing with, and thoughts of doubt. You're especially flirty, which, while beneficial, may come off a little stronger than intended, and land you in some not-so-savory situations.

getting a good grade as a “gifted” child doesn’t like actually feel good for very long or allow you to be happy with your success or anything ime, it just means that you’ve escaped the immediate necessity of self-castigation & proven that you’re not completely worthless THIS time, so you’re just briefly relieved and then immediately have to start worrying about the next grade that you’re going to get

also there’s not really much of a thing as a “good” grade, there’s an “acceptable” grade which is 100% of the points that you could have earned on something, and an “unacceptable” grade which is anything else and which will lead to self-reproach no matter how “good” other people might think it is

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The next day, Shouyou returned to the temple.

There was no use in staying at the villa—not when Kageyama would be gone, and no one left there to fill the awful hole that seemed to have opened in Shouyou’s heart.

It was different, than all the times they’d said goodbye before it. Different even than the first time, when Shouyou had thought he wouldn’t be returning month after month, to tumble from the carriage doors and run straight to where Kageyama waited, always, for him.

It was worse now, having made up his mind to stay, but having no idea when Kageyama could return to him. So Shouyou came back to the temple, to wait. At least there, he had the people he’d grown up with. He had his duties. He could try, as best he could, to be distracted.

And, as little as it was, he was not wholly without news of his centurion. For Kageyama sent him letters, as often as he was able.

The first letter came in place of the carriage that would have usually arrived to bring Shouyou to the temple. It was delivered by messenger, and Shouyou was so eager to open the wax seal with Kageyama’s insignia that he nearly ripped the paper in two. He snuck away to a secluded corner where he could read undisturbed.

Keep reading

At Peace (langst)

I should be updating my Sockathan story on Wattpad but I’m not feeling so hot so have some langst.

~ songfic kinda ~

+ I’m pretty much going to be posting langst or Oikawa angst (Tangst?) when I’m in a shit mood so get ready for that +

Lance was used to being rejected; by girls and boys alike.

So he should have seen this coming. He should have been prepared for this. But no, his hopes were high and he’d thought his feelings were -finally- reciprocated. He thought he had a chance and damn it if I don’t admit it. He was desperate.

I don’t know if we should be alone together 

He was desperate for attention, and love, and the chance to finally be accepted by somebody. Anybody. A chance to have something to live for again. A chance to be able to breathe again without the thought of his worthlessness crossing his mind and settling in a nice, quaint spot labeled “REASONS TO DIE”. The cringe is real, no matter how you think of it, but Lance can’t find it in himself to care anymore, about anything.

His constant quips usually spoken -sometimes even shouted- in a flurry of passion, are now most times left unsaid, or muttered at most.

He was hoping for a miracle.

I still got a crush, that’s obvious

“Hey, Keithy boy,” Lance chirped with as much enthusiasm as he could muster. 

Keith turned to face the blue paladin, a small smile playing on his lips. “Hey, Lance,” he replied happily.

You seem unusually chipper today, Lance thought to himself.

Suddenly. Keith chuckled, startling Lance out of his ‘thought’. 

The brunette covered his lips with his hand, eyes blown wide. “Did I say that out loud?”

If nobody’s around, what’s stopping us?
Everywhere I go you show, whatever

“You sure did, Lancelot. D’ya wanna know why I’m so ‘chipper’?“ Keith asked with a slight giddiness in his tone.

“Uhm, sure?” Okay, Lance. After he tells you whatever the fuck he’s so happy about -which is making him 100% cuter and I cannot stand it- I’ll tell him I love him, and we’ll live happily ever after.

With the widest smile I’ve ever seen, on Keith no less, Keith gushed out, “Shiro and I finally started dating!”

I don’t ever mind sharing oxygen
I just wanna get lost in your lungs

I spoke far too soon. “T-That’s great, Keith!” What did I think I could accomplish? “I hope you guys are happy together!” Of course Keith would go for Shiro. “Well, I gotta go u-uh, t-train now, so see ya!” He’s perfect.

Lance began to turn away from Keith. “Wait!” The red paladin demanded, grabbing the other’s arm and keeping him in place. “Did you need to talk about something, Lance? Are you okay?”

Just a baby, but she’s growing up so fast
And I’m allergic to the waiting

“O-Of course I am! I’m the jester, the class clown, the humour back bone of the team! Who needs feeling when you have the best sense of humour known to man?” The dark haired teenager announced, his chest puffed out and his eyes full of a dark hope. Please don’t call me out on my bullshit, I need to be out of here yesterday.

Thank god Keith’s dense as hell. “Alright Lance, whatever you say,” he chuckled and released his arm.

She’s just a baby girl
And I love to watch her dance

Tears left Lance’s eyes before he even finished turning, thankfully he didn’t notice but.

That didn’t stop Shiro from noticing, who now was in front of Lance. “Lance,” the black paladin whispered, his eyes shone with concern. “Are you alright? What happened?”

Shiro reached out to touch Lance’s shoulder, but he wasn’t having it. Tanned hands pushed on Shiro’s chest, pushing him -surprisingly- a few feet away, and in the next moment, Lance was out the door, leaving the new couple in shock.

But it’s making me go crazy

In the next few months, Lance got by in a mixture of disarray and monotone. Lotor was taken down, along with the Galra empire. The new head of said empire agreed on a peace treaty and most of the universe now lived in peace. 

Voltron was not needed anymore. And so, the team was left to their own devices. 

Pidge and Matt, the only Holts left, went on to create new, advanced machinery to help Earth evolve technologically.

Keith and Shiro went to a quiet inhabited planet, where there was a drug that could evolve the bodies of men in order to conceive, so the two can start a family. 

I don’t think that we should be around each other
When you’re in the room, you get my eyes
You open your mouth, I’m hypnotized, oh oh
I can make you laugh until you cry

Allura and Coran and the castle went on to rebuild the Altean empire. 

Hunk went home to Earth, with his family. He offered Lance a spot on his small ship to get home, but he declined, claiming he had to do something before going home.

Which, of course, was a lie. Because Lance has a secret he never told anyone, and that secret was that Lance has no family. 

The photo he showed everyone so proudly? Photo-shopped. His stories of his many siblings? MTV and YouTube. His emergency contacts on his profile back at the Garrison? His supposed nostalgia? His strict parental control? His life? All fake. All a fantasy Lance had built in his head when his real parents dumped him on the side of the road at 9-years-old because he broke his arm and couldn’t work on the farm anymore. 

You know you got all my attention
You know you got all mine, mmh

He had nothing to go back to. No purpose. No one waiting for him. No one to miss and love him. 

What was he supposed to do now? Go back to the Garrison? No, it wasn’t worth it if Pidge and Hunk weren’t there. 

What else was there? 

Lance sat in his space pod in the middle of space for hours before he realized, there’s nothing else.

Lance spent a few more hours of thinking about what he planned to do next. How would it affect the others? Will they come back? How will they react?

Baby, I can’t help but call her dad
Even though I shouldn’t say it 

In the back of his mind, one thought lingered: will they even care?

The ex-paladin of Voltron decided that his choice was the right one, and carried out his plan. 

He spent the next few hours filming a personal video for every member of the team. Even Matt. 

She was my baby girl
I might never get her back
But I don’t mind being patient, yeah

Can you let your baby be my girl?

But he didn’t dare send them yet. No, he had to send them at the very last second. 

Because he needed time to himself. He needed to prepare himself. He needed to find one, just one reason for him not to follow through with his decision. 

He couldn’t find any.

Can you let your baby be my girl?
Can you let your baby be my girl?
Can you let your baby be mine? 

With a tear rolling down his cheek, Lance sent all of the video’s to their respective person’s. Hopefully, they all get them.

Okay, I’m just gonna tell you what I gotta say, right here
I’m sorry Dave, I never meant to hurt your baby girl
She’s your little baby, she’s my soulmate

The broken boy put on his helmet, and with a deep breath, opened the door that separated him from endless space.

Location didn’t mean a thing to him, as he never truly had place to call home.

I don’t want you to worry, she’ll be so safe right here
Oh, oh, oh, so Dave, would you let your baby be my girl?

Can you let your baby be my girl?

More tears poured from his eyes, as Lance took deep breaths, and let his decision sink in entirely. He had no regrets.

Can you let your baby be my girl?
Can you let your baby be my girl?
Can you let your baby be mine? 

Lance sniffled, and although he couldn’t wipe his tears, he steadied them, pulling one last strong face. With his messages sent, his loved one gone, and nothing holding him back, the broken soldier, the brave face took his final breath. Finally, he reached up to his helmet and disengaged it, sucking the oxygen out. 

One last tear fell from his face as Lance’s final sight became apparent: the blue lion, engines blasting, rushing over to her dear paladin as the final remnants of air left his lungs, and Lance found:

that he was finally at peace.

Oh, your baby she’s mine

I’m…

I’m so sorry. I was just supposed to blow off some steam but… I related to Lance. His loneliness, his perception of love, and his lack of anger. 

Rage, irritation, grief: they can’t be felt anymore.

Anyways, I was planning on writing a fic for each of the videos… what do you think? (Imma do it anyways lmao)

I hope you enjoyed this… 

“She’s too good for you” - Dick Grayson x Reader

Summary : You finally meet your boyfriend’s family. 

Just a short little thing I wanted to write about the eldest of the batkids…Hope you’ll like it :s.

(My masterlist blog here : https://ella-ravenwood-archives.tumblr.com)

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You were watching TV, on your own, in your tiny apartment when it all happened. 

A knock on your door, and then said door opening. You didn’t worry, you knew who it was.

-(Y/N), how many times will I have to tell you that you need to lock your door ? Gotham is a dangerous city…

You turned around, kneeling up on your couch, to look at him. Richard Grayson was facing you. Your boyfriend. You smiled with defiance.

-You know Richie, if someone really wanted to get in my house, the lock wouldn’t do anything. They can just bust the door open with one kick. It’s a very shitty door, in a very shitty complex apartment. No one will ever even think anything valuable is in there. And they’d be right. 

-I beg to disagree, there’s one very valuable thing in this apartment…

You raised your eyebrows. Even your TV was like a hundred years old, and totally worthless. He walked toward you, stopping behind your couch to kiss you. You kissed back eagerly, tangling your hand in his hair, and he pulled back with a low chuckle. Oh you loved his laugh so much. It was damn sexy. 

-You. I’m talking about you (Y/N). 

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100 quote prompts

Feel free to use these quotes directly, or just use them as inspiration!

1-“These are my absolute favorite pajamas!”
2-“How could you say that to their face?”
3-“Woah, nice catch!”
4-“You’re lucky to be alive right now.”
5-“This is the last chance we’re ever going to get.”
6-“When was the last time you flossed?”
7-Wait, wait, how many did you say there were?“
8-"I’m horrified, yet impressed.”
9-“Give it to me straight,  Doc!”
10-“I miss someone i never knew.”
11-“I didn’t know you could sing!”
12-“This is all the money I have.”
13-“Oh please, please pick up the phone!”
14-“Do you think you could teach me?”
15-“Just answer this one question and i won’t ever bother you again.”
16-“I don’t actually like sushi, I lied to impress you.”
17-“uhhh…anyone know what poison ivy looks like?”
18-“What do you mean you never learned how to tie your shoes?”
19-“Name one thing I’m bad at. Ha, you can’t,  can you?”
20-“I just don’t think we’re compatable.”
21-“I bet you 50 bucks you can’t drink this entire thing of hot sauce.”
22-I really don’t want to hear about medical problems"
23-“Stop saying your worthless, because you’re not.”
24-“Wow, that’s a really wierd looking bug.”
25-“Just because you saved my life dosent mean I owe you anything!”
26-“I will never die!”
27-“Today would’ve been a disaster without you.”
28-“I’m begging you,  go change your clothes. ”
29-“You still haven’t found them?”
30-“I’m not sure how you did it,  but I’m glad you did.”
31-“Not around the baby!”
32-“Hey, do you think horses know they’re horses?”
33-“How much of my life has been a lie?”
34-“If you don’t tell them you like them,  I’m going to do it for you.”
35-“Wow, that’s almost as old as you are!”
36-“Its because of you my arm hurts so much.”
37-“I told you never to open that!”
38-“Everything has to be a goddam ordeal with you,  dosent it?”
39-“Sorry, but that’s just not your color.”
40-“How do you live like this?”
41-“You’ll always be my best friend,  but…”
42-“Is that really the best insult you could come up with?
43-"There’s a reason I never go outside.”
44-“You should really get that checked out.”
45-“Why are you ignoring me?”
46-“Can you believe it’s been so long?”
47-“I just want one nice picture of us!”
48-“Really? You’re going to judge me for this?”
49-“It’s ok, just ask first next time.”
50-“What could go wrong?”
51-“We’ve both changed”
52-“I was a fool to trust you.”
53-“I’m mad at myself.”
54-“You promised you wouldn’t laugh!”
55-“I know it'stechnically not a big deal but i will totally fight you over this.”
56-“Would whoever left their dirty sock on the living room floor please come pick it up.”
57-“I didn’t push you,  the wind pushed you. ”
58-“Hey, thanks for making an effort.”
59-“I totally called it, but no one listened!”
60-“How can you stand this mess?”
61-“But you have to remember!”
62-“You’re not the person I thought you were.”
63-“That was incredibly stupid and dangerous. Nice job. ”
64-“It’s your birthday!?”
65-“Can I tell you about a dream I had?”
66-“How was i supposed to know that’s a a rude gesture here?”
67-“I wasn’t certain that really happened.”
68-“Why do you smell so wierd?”
69-“That was awful! Let’s do it again!”
70-“It’s time to face the consequences.”
71-“That is the most elaborate prank I’ve ever seen.”
72-“You know I love you, but that was the worst.”
73-“I’m trying my best,  but it’s just not good enough!”
74-“Now who’s ready to probably die!”
75-“Well,  it turns out I’m allergic.”
76-“Why do all of your socks have holes in them?”
77-“Please stop crying on my papers”
78-“Well, if that’s really what you want.”
79-“I’ve never felt like that before.”
80-“This changes everything!”
81-“Are you sure you triple checked?”
82-“Don’t tell me to calm down! You calm down!”
83-“I’m going to give you the best night of your life.”
84-“So I bet you’re all wondering how I’m still alive.”
85-“Not them.  Anyone but them. ”
86-“Why won’t you say I love you back?”
87-“That was the grossest thing ever.”
88-“I don’t think that qualifies as a sport.”
89-“If I do this,  will you leave me alone?”
90-“You’re an idiot. I like that about you.”
91-“No, you know what? Don’t answer that.”
92-“I know you said I don’t want to know,  but i really want to know.”
93-“I followed you into hell!”
94-“Oooh, this is great blackmail!”
95-“I won’t tell anyone you were crying.”
96-“No way,  that’s also my favorite!”
97-“Don’t you dare ruin this for them.”
98-“That’s just sick. I can’t believe you.”
99-“Ok fine. Maybe we are friends. 
100-"No matter what, I want you to know that I’m proud of you.”

how far have you walked for men who’ve never held your feet in their laps?
how often have you bartered with bone, only to sell yourself short?
why do you find the unavailable so alluring?
where did it begin? what went wrong? and who made you feel so worthless?
if they wanted you, wouldn’t they have chosen you?
all this time, you were begging for love silently, thinking they couldn’t hear you, but they smelt it on you, you must have known that they could taste the desperate on your skin?
and what about the others that would do anything for you, why did you make them love you until you could not stand it?
how are you both of these women, both flighty and needful?
where did you learn this, to want what does not want you?
where did you learn this, to leave those that want to stay?
—  Warsan Shire, “Questions for the Woman I was Last Night”
Obsessions (Part 4)

Writer- @myhellyourstories

Requested-

Request-

Disclaimer- I do not own any of the Descendants characters, all credit goes to the creator and producers of Disney’s Descendants. All I own is my story.

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Pairing- Harry Hook x Fem! Reader

Warning(s)- Cursing, Taking about abuse, Self-harming, Blood.

Words- 2561

A/N- I don’t feel like writing Harry’s pirate grammar, so imagine it’s more piratey.

Originally posted by seaside-stars

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I try not to get too involved in the fandom drama too often these days since it’s usually wasted effort but seeing this latest round of attacks on Zayn, I couldn’t keep quiet. This hits too close to home for me.

As just a handful of you know, I lost my dad just under three weeks ago to complications from lung cancer. Much like the person Zayn is helping by tweeting out her GoFundMe page, our family was blind-sided by a Stage Four diagnosis when my dad was admitted to the hospital for what seemed an unrelated matter. We were stunned and devastated to be suddenly faced with the inevitability of his demise that came much quicker than we anticipated.

I’m not fifteen. I can’t even imagine how terrified that woman’s daughter must be at the thought of losing the most important person in her life at such a crucial time (not that it’s ever easy to lose a parent). Luckily, they seem to have a good support system that includes the Malik family. 

No one knows to what extent they have already contributed to her cause but guess what? It doesn’t matter because I’m sure it’s happened in more ways than just financial. 

Cancer treatments are notoriously expensive and this woman’s last resort might be an experimental treatment in another country. Even though I’m sure Zayn has helped (because that’s the type of person he has proven to be) he has a huge online presence that could benefit her immensely. She has also promised that any outstanding monies will go to other patients to aid in their care in the case that the treatment fails to work.

The fact that many of you chose to use this as an occasion to belittle Zayn for his effort when you heap praise on OT4 for literally the exact same thing is disgusting beyond belief. How can you feel good about taking something pure and pissing all over it, effectively taking attention away from the person in need? Clearly you value your bullying time more and that is reprehensible in ways I cannot begin to articulate.

Why does it matter that it’s his mom’s friend?? Why should that disqualify her from getting our attention? Have you even considered that perhaps she doesn’t want to get everything she needs from them? Would you be okay with your best friend and her family paying every last cent for this treatment out of their own pocket? Have you even for a moment stopped to think about the person at the center of this issue? I think we all know the answer to that.

You certainly don’t need to give a single cent. It’s not mandatory in case you forgot. It’s pretty clear you don’t give a rat’s ass about Ayesha and her daughter. If you for a minute stopped to think about how this is going to affect her perhaps you would’ve thought twice before giving your worthless opinion.

Can you imagine how they’re going to feel when they hear that their friend’s son is getting trashed for trying to help her out? Do you even care that you’re adding negativity to an already unbelievably stressful and frightening time? It doesn’t seem like you do. The only thing that matters to petty mean girls like you is having another go at Zayn, right?

As someone who was just in Ayesha’s family’s shoes, I’m just gonna go ahead and say it:  GO FUCK YOURSELVES.