things you should watch in your lifetime

EDIT IN PROCESS


As promised, here is my list of ereri ficrecs THIS LIST IS FUCKING HUGE BTW (50+ fics). So, feel free to blacklist ‘sarah’s ficrec’ in order to keep this from clogging your dash. I think I have them organized pretty well, but I really don’t have a good understanding of the word, so yeah. Also, I feel like I should mention this: if your fic appears on this list, and I haven’t left kudos IM SORRY I AM TERRIBLE ABOUT FORGETTING TO LEAVE THEM. And, all works posted only come from Archive of Our Own. So, anything posted exclusively to Tumblr, FanFiction, etc. is not going to be on this list. Also, if any of the multi-chapter fics are rated ‘E’: IT PROBABLY HAS SOME FRICK FRACK. So, please be wary of tags. All the fics are posted in alphabetical order.

TIME TO REC SOME MOTHERFUCKING FANFICS


AU MULTI-CHAPTER (incomplete) -

Around Your Neck by morphemes 

WC: 90k+ | MATURE  - DROPPED

In the depths of the city of Trost, there lies a dangerous and violent rivalry between Sina Academy and Maria Grammar School. The debacle unfolds when Eren Jaeger takes one step too far in his hatred toward the Sina elite, when defending his best friend. With his education on the line, he’s signed up to help develop the annual festival hosted by his school for the town – a perfect opportunity to upstage Sina Academy in a form of revenge. Events lead to first encounters and Eren meets Levi, the mysterious lead singer of a local rock band, and his friends. The tension unravels as Eren tries his hardest to make his school the best it can be and attempt to keep his lacking love life in check, all whilst trying to grow up with those surrounding him. 

Domestic Relations by Shangalangalang 

WC: 37k+ | MATURE

It was only supposed to be for a little while, just until Eren got his degree in psychology and Rivaille paid back his debts to Grisha. But what was only supposed to be for a while turned into an unlikely roommate romance between a college psychology major and a hardass, sleep-deprived doctor, and it all goes downhill from there.

Everytime I Poop, I Think of You by suckaknob 

WC: 11k+ | MATURE

Eren and Levi spend the night drinking and getting into a lot of trouble. They wake up to a lot of surprises. 

Ice Cream in Winter by kazuma85 

WC: 25k+ | MATURE

Eren is a University freshman forced by his sister and his girlfriend to take dancing lessons with them. 

In the dance school, he meets his short and slightly quirky instructor with whom he already had a short and nearly disastrous encounter.

If the Seas Catch Fire by RobinRedR

WC: 46k+ | MATURE

Eren doesn’t really like gay people. Well, and that’s putting it lightly. Somehow, Armin convinces – read ‘blackmails’ – him into joining Trost High’s Gay-Straight Alliance in the hopes of altering his chauvinistic attitude. Now enter Levi, who is pretty damn smart and badass and different, and who begins cropping up everywhere like a weed in the neat flowerbed of Eren’s life. He is also, unfortunately for Eren, very very gay.

Otherwise known as the high school!AU in which pretty much no one is straight, Hanji runs the experiment of their lifetime, and maybe there is more backstory to Eren’s bigotry than first meets the eye.

Keep Your Head Up by MildlyMoonstruck 

WC: 102k+ | MATURE

It’s not that he doesn’t want to be at auditions, Levi acknowledges—if there’s anything that’s true about him, it’s that he will never do something unless he really wants to, on some level. ‘That’s the only stupid reason I said yes to this,’ he grouses, scowling. ‘Never should have watched Dr. Horrible with Erwin and Hanji that one time. Note to self: don’t let anyone know you like things. Liking things is stupid and gives people a way to exploit you because they know you want to do Dr. Horrible like nobody’s fucking business, and they were counting on that. Ugh. I hate them. I hate people.’

Enter a certain bright-eyed freshman who can’t seem to keep his mouth shut.

Keeping Time by WolfNotFawn 

WC: 25+ | EXPLICIT

Eren was a bright-eyed dreamer with hopes of making it as a singer, oh, and a hopeless crush on the man who was supposed to help him become one.

Lists by Trick_Fantasy 

WC: 68k+ | EXPLICIT

The story of Levi (“Why bother trying to make friends when you can learn to control people instead?”) and Eren (“Because you can control people better when they think that they’re your friends. They don’t even know they’re being manipulated.”) coping with social interaction at college in their own different ways.

Never Back Down by warschach 

WC: 78k+ | EXPLICIT

Eren is a stubborn omega that refuses to submit to any Alpha’s will. No one can make him surrender and therefore he has prided himself on his ability to resist the most imposing Alphas out there. Enter Levi, an beautiful Alpha that makes Eren’s inside wet (literally) and never backs down from a challenge. He set on making Eren his Omega but Eren doesn’t play nice. Now if only that nagging voice inside of him begging for submission would just shut up, Eren will be just fine resisting the beautiful raven. 

Organic Chemistry by pachysandra {WC: 26k+ | RATING: T}

Paint It Red by mc_jaeger (also eruren) {WC: 16k+ | RATING: T}

Romance Is Only a Click Away by Matcha (also eruren, erejean) {WC: 21k+ | RATING: E}

Room 23 by ghosts_desu {WC: 63k+ | RATING: M}

Sang D'Encre by minorthirds {WC: 88k+ | RATING: M}

Sometimes Things Turn Out for the Best by Resmiranda {WC: 132k+ | RATING: M}

Traffic Jams and Holding Hands by Thequietgamer {WC: 17k+ | RATING: M}

Turning Point by LiquidLithium {WC: 5k+ | RATING: M}

Undercover by bexara {WC: 7k+ | RATING: M}

Wanderlust by Sabrinanikkol {100k+ | RATING: E}


AU MULTI-CHAPTER (complete) -

3 A.M. by loveatfirstsight

WC: 101k+ | EXPLICIT

The story is about Levi: A neurotic man who suffers from depression, is successful at writing but unsuccessful at everything else. Setting: Breakfast (never in the morning) at his favorite diner, a record store that hasn’t dusted its ceiling fan since the 1970’s, a hole in the wall cafe to drink black tea and judge the terrible tongue tied poets on the shoddy ill-lit stage, a park with swings that are always annoyingly wet, and his immaculate apartment in the city. Levi is riddled with quirky traditions and struggles with anxiety, still battling childhood memories he can never completely forget. Then enter Eren Jaeger, the too loud and too passionate guitar player that takes the stage one night that just won’t stop staring at Levi. Eren is full of hope and promise and everything Levi needs, but Levi can’t have what’s good for him. Right?

34,000 Feet Above the Ground by kaorusquee {WC: 8k+ | RATING: M}

The 6th Ward by coldmakerel {WC: 93k+ | RATING: M}

Art of War by catsonfire 

WC: 52k+ | EXPLICIT

Noisy neighbors, nursling dinosaurs, satanic box cutters, shitty convenience store management, the word ‘fuck’, hereditary (but not really) homosexuality, beer and ramen, pennies, truckstops, strippers, closets, semi-public defacing, rings, house parties, “recreational” drug use, accidental rendezvous, toxic stew (don’t eat the stew), nice abs, housewives–batteries not included, over-educational movie sessions, copious domesticity, kittens named after landlords, a shit joke at participating locations, and many, many happy endings.

A modern AU in which Eren moves into the apartment directly above Levi’s.

Charnelle by madchilla {WC: 24k+ | RATING: E}

Club Tryst by ScarlettSiren {WC: 36k+ | RATING: E}

Dental Care by elliewritesthings {WC: 14k+ | RATING: T}

ED May Stand for Emotional Dysregulation… But It Doesn’t Have To by SolSermisiere {WC: 18k+ | RATING: E}

Epilogues Are Better Than Prologues by ninanna {WC: 37k+ | RATING: T}

A Forged Wedding by mistyhollowdrummer {180k+ | RATING: M}

Haute Couture Love by SailorHeichou (also eruren) 

WC: 163k+ | RATING: MATURE

Eren Jaeger is sharp, determined and hard working but doesn’t consider himself beautiful or good looking in the least. When he lands his dream job, working at Survey Corp Publications as the Executive Assistant to a high-end Fashion magazine’s Editor-in-Chief, his life is turned Topsy-Turvy. All he wants to do is work hard to become an Editor, but his boss Levi seems keen on making his life a living hell.

Levi is a notorious playboy who gets what he wants both in and out of the bedroom. As Editer-in-Chief of New York’s best selling high-end Fashion Magazine, Levi is forced to work with an overly determined, hot-headed brat with a rat’s nest for hair and the most incredible eyes he’s ever seen and it’s all because of Erwin Smith.

Holding Hands in the Rain by twisting_vine_x 

WC: 106k+ | EXPLICIT

Basically the one with thousands of words of Eren and Levi crushing like crazy on each other, and being absolutely freaking ridiculous together, and slowly falling in love against the backdrop of modern-day Vancouver.

- - -

Levi only realizes how much he’s not paying attention to anything around him when there are shoes beside the puddle he’s drawing. Looks up to find Eren standing right there in the rain, the hood on his jacket pulled back, and his hair plastered down against his head. He’s just standing there, and – he’s watching Levi with an expression that looks so fond it actually hurts; and Levi’s just managed to get his breath back and open his mouth when Eren moves closer, and Levi loses his air all over again.

It Was Monday by Nelly_Belly 

WC: 14k+ | EXPLICIT

Levi is an art student, Eren is the new model.

Junkyard Dogs by acidtowns 

WC: 70k+ | EXPLICIT

Autocracy — a system where one leader has absolute power — is the only government that exists in prison. Levi is the current ‘Top Dog,’ and for years, no one has had the mind to challenge his position — at least, no one until now. Enter: Eren Jaeger, a new inmate with indefinite mentalities and obscure motives. With the power to shake Levi’s throne, Eren becomes the one exception of everything.

Knockout by Raylou 

WC: 113k+ | MATURE

Eren joins the Keith Shadis Self Defense Academy as part of a deal with Armin. For the rest of the summer he has one-on-one sessions with the district’s best martial artist and captain of the Academy’s elite tournament competitors, Levi. Levi is known for scaring off students with his brutal teaching methods, but in order to become an instructor, he needs to prove that he can hold a student in private lessons. Levi doesn’t want to soften himself in order to get promoted, and Eren doesn’t want to become another cowardly student. Eren plans to become Levi’s first official student. The fat crush he develops on Levi is unplanned, but not entirely unwelcome.

Louder Than Words by TheArtofWar 

WC: 142k+ | EXPLICIT

My boyfriend, Eren Jaeger, disappeared ten days before his seventeenth birthday.

Six months later, he was found again, completely intact save for his mental and emotional scars. Oh, and the fact that he would never be able to speak again.

And so, we all started to rebuild from the debris that had been left in the destruction of our lives.

Love’s a Menace by seaofteeth 

WC: 17k+ | EXPLICIT

“Your favorite customer is here!” Hanji continued and damn them, Levi could practically hear their shit-eating grin. That could only mean one thing.

My Old Friend by mongoose_bite

WC: 12k+ | EXPLICIT

When Levi was a teenager, the unrequited love of his life was Eren, his best friend’s father. Fifteen years later, Levi finds himself back in Whitecrest Cove to sell his late uncle’s house.

Night Drive by shotgunsinlace 

WC: 50k+ | EXPLICIT

Working as a desk clerk for Sina Enterprises isn’t the most grandiose job out there, but it sure beats every other option Eren had jotted down since graduation. Troubled past behind him, Eren strives to make a name for himself by not fucking up the only good thing he has going for him. But when a certain foul-mouthed and dapper executive waltzes through the lobby doors, Eren is more than willing to set aside his “no fraternizing with the higher-ups” rule. However, the engagement ring on Levi’s finger proves to be a deal breaker. It was supposed to be a one night stand, one night to get each other out of their systems, but the two of them bit off more than they could chew.

No Such Thing As Fate by mysecretfanmoments

WC: 52k+ | EXPLICIT

“You forgot,” he said, with a tone of sudden clarity. “Ah. So that’s why you called me captain.”

Reincarnation AU in which Eren and Levi never established a relationship in that other life.

Not All Lips Go Blue by claralikesfood

WC: 35k+ | MATURE

Eren never expected to be here. Never, in his life, he had thought of a situation that would lead him into this. Sure he had had some strange experiences. For example, that one time he ended up wandering in a girl’s underwear shop for almost two hours, before noticing where he was (he even had chosen a pair of panties). This, however, was another level.

The Red Long Johns, Or “Be Sure to Dress in Layers” by shulkie 

WC: 32k+ | MATURE

It’s the week of the yearly Trust Initiative Teen Action Network (T.I.T.A.N.) retreat but this year Levi is left out in the cold when Hanji breaks her leg. To make things worse, Principal Smith gets a replacement chaperone—the new, very green English teacher Eren Jaeger. Levi and Eren butt heads over every little thing from professional to personal. Despite all of this, Levi finds himself distracted by the red long johns the fashion-challenged Eren wears under all of his winter gear and just how to get into them…

Serendipity by seaofteeth {WC: 10k+ | RATING: E}

A Tenuous Third Space by artenon {WC: 13k+ | RATING: T}

Thursday by yaoimage {WC: 38k+ | RATING: T}

Time’s Up by dippthy {WC: 14k+ | RATING: NR}

An Unforgettable Face by ryuusea – WC: 16k+ | EXPLICIT

“Have we met before? I recognize your face…” Levi’s brows furrow, scouring his memory as to why he knows this guy’s face from somewhere.

“Ah, you’ve probably seen one of my videos!”

“Hmm. YouTube?”

“No. Porn.”

Woke Up Dead by PresquePommes {WC: 50k+ | RATING: E}

Yesterday, I Loved You by acidtowns {WC: 14k+ | RATING: G}


CANON VERSE MULTI-CHAPTER (incomplete) -

I Trust You by twisting_vine_x 

WC: 6k+ | EXPLICIT

Later that night, he ends up lying in bed with Levi, the air cool on his skin.

Eren’s already out of his shirt, down to nothing but his pants; but Levi’s in no hurry, it seems. Still has all his clothes on, and is propped up on one elbow, trailing his fingers along Eren’s chest and stomach as Eren lies there on his back and tries his best to not squirm all over, his pants tented obscenely and his fingers twisted in the sheets. He’s flushed pretty much all the way down his neck and chest, at this point. Grits his teeth and tries to think over how hard his heart is beating.

Shit, it’s hard to think when Levi’s looking at him like that.

Inappropriate by the_original_n_chan

WC: 24k+ | EXPLICIT

Eren is trying desperately to figure out what he wants. Levi knows all too well what he wants, and that he probably shouldn’t pursue it. (Make that definitely.) But temptation is a bitch, Levi is far from a saint, and Eren is way too hard to resist.

Mikasa, I’m with Child by NeigeAuSoeil {WC: 99k+ | RATING: E}

This Cruel Yet Beautiful World by fandomesque {WC: 11k+ | RATING: E}


CANON VERSE MULTI-CHAPTER (complete) -

Beyond the Walls by Light_Within_Darkness {WC: 72k+ | RATING: E}

Blackbird by the_ugly_fic_ling

WC: 9k+ | GENERAL

The war is over. Humanity is free…

…except for Levi, whose medical complications lead to an amputation that leaves him feeling trapped, broken, and alone.

And he might have stayed there too, if it hadn’t been for a certain green-eyed soldier who was too stubborn for his own good.

Courting Troubles by Bird_of_Dreams {WC: 10k+ | RATING: T}

Don’t Let Go by twisting_vine_x 

WC: -5k | TEEN

That night, he wakes up – he’s not even sure when he managed to fall asleep – with Eren’s mouth a phantom press against his own, and his hands tangled into the sheets instead of Eren’s hair.

Lies there and pants, his heart slamming in his chest, and then wipes an arm across his eyes, and rolls out of bed. His knees aren’t quite steady and his face is flushed; and he slides on his slippers and wraps his housecoat tight around himself, and then crosses the room to splash some water on his face.

Ends up leaning over the basin with his hands holding tight to the table, doing his best to not look in the mirror, because he really doesn’t like what he sees there.

This is horrible.

Let Me Help by twisting_vine_x {WC: 12k+ | RATING: E}

The Misanthrope by kazuma85 {WC: 25k+ | RATING: E}

A Sound like Breaking Glass by mongoose_bite {WC: 53k+ | RATING: E}

These Weren’t Memories by mongoose_bite {WC: 24k+ | RATING: E}

Trompe-l'oeil by appleapple 

WC: 11k+ | MATURE

He has never minded the bitterness at the bottom of the cup.

Warm Water by KeroseneShowers {WC: 35k+ | RATING: E} 


AU ONESHOTS -

Checkout by carpebagel {WC: -5k | RATING: T}

Cuddling Under the Stars by Bluefxy {WC: -5k | RATING: M}

Embers by residualechoes {WC: -5k | RATING: G}

Five Years by ichogoangel {WC: -5k | RATING: G}

A Nest of Pillows by ErenShorts {WC: -5k | RATING: G}

Nocturnal Baby Dinosaur by Essence {WC: -5k | RATING: G}

Professionalism by Mysecretfanmoments {WC: 5k+ | RATING: T}

The Question Game by suckaknob {WC: -5k | RATING: M}

Titan Onesie by AuroraLovene {WC: -5k | RATING: G}

Tu et Moi by YourShadow {WC: -5k | RATING: T}

Unprofessional by S_N_Sterling {WC: -5k | RATING: T}

You’re Kidding? by Zzxya {WC: 7k+ | RATING: M}

Wings Like Cobwebs by seaofteeth

WC: -5k | TEEN

Eren is an incubus. Levi is asexual. They fall in love anyway.


CANON VERSE ONESHOTS -

Green-Eyed Monster by lunardistance {WC: -5k | RATING: T}

Holiday by appleapple {WC: -5k | RATING: M}

In Which Eren Regrets Trying to Socialize by Aurorealis {WC: -5k | RATING: G}

Incomprehensible by DoomedTemperament (slightly nsfw) {WC: -5k | RATING: M}

Lay with Me, Stay with Me by zhedang

WC: 4k+ | TEEN

Levi had been sleeping with Eren for over a year. Just that: sleeping.

Laundry Duty by idioticintentions {WC: -5k | RATING: T}

On the Rooftop by JaegerBombs {WC: -5k | RATING: G}

Playing Favorites by Ketita 

WC: 6k+ | TEEN

In which Levi seems determined to spoil Eren rotten, whether he likes it or not.

(For the record, Eren hadn’t expected his confession to lead to this sort of thing at all).

Rules of Breeding by milleandra (slightly nsfw) {WC: -5k | RATING: M}

Taking Flight by ilydaa {WC: -5k | RATING: G}

Ten Kisses by kittenprince (slightly nsfw) {WC: 8k+ | RATING: M}

Until the End of the World by noero  (slightly nsfw) {WC: -5k | RATING: M}

Want by artenon

WC: -5k | MATURE

Eren sits on the edge of the bed. Levi waits for him to lie down next to him so they can sleep, but Eren just continues to stare at the floor. He looks like he’s working up the nerve to say something, so Levi waits patiently, and sure enough, Eren turns to him a minute later and opens his mouth.

“Have you ever thought about sex?”


SMUT ONESHOTS 
WELL-WRITTEN SMUT ONESHOTS -

Always Taking Care of Me by twisting_vine_x 

WC: -5k | CANON

Levi should have never taught Eren how to fuck.

Ambrosia by Missmurder {WC: 6k+ | AU}

As Gentlemen by XoxStrifexoX {WC: 7k+ | AU}

Barley Legal by CuddleFuddle {WC: -5k | CANON}

Black Gloves by ryuusea 

WC 5k+ | AU

Levi gets no warning, just a jerk of Eren’s head and a glimmer of pearly whites before he feels teeth sink into the index finger and thumb of his gloved hand.

Blue Silence by loveatfirstsight {WC: 6k+ | AU}

Body Choreography by kirakiracats {WC: 6k+ | AU}

Call the Shots, Babe by MildlyMoonstruck {WC: -5k | AU}

Christening the Kitchen by JaegerBombs {WC: -5k | AU}

A Commander By Any Other Name by shotgunsinlace 

WC: 5k+ | CANON

Rising in the chain of command normally isn’t something worth celebrating, but after a division-wide toast that triggers a foreign sense of merriment in him, Levi isn’t above getting his hands a little dirty. Lucky for him, Eren’s been waiting for this night for the last six years.

Come Closer by noero 

WC: 6k+ | CANON

Completing the Hunt by murakamism  

WC: -5k | CANON

Levi marks him, over and over and then over the same spots, wishing that they would stay past morning. He’s mine, Levi thinks, and growls at the thought of others not knowing.

Countdown by Opulence {WC: 16k+ | AU}

Do, Pretty Boy, Don’t Think by erenjaegrr {WC: -5k | CANON}

Don’t Worry, I’m Weak to You by myoue {WC: 6k+ | AU}

An Exercise in Self-Restraint by kirakiracats 

WC: 10k+ | AU

Levi moves away from the only town he’s ever known, off to university and away from his two friends, Isabel and Farlan. Having roommates is a new experience, one that he thinks will be totally unpleasant, but when the last person to turn up is a gorgeous male omega, his perspective changes.

Unfortunately for him, it’s bad practice to fuck your flatmate. Levi has a tough year ahead.

Fragile by noero {WC: 8k+ | CANON}

Good Enough to Eat by kirakiracats 

WC: -5k | AU

Eren has a new kink that he wants to try, and if Levi had actually been paying attention and not been so sarcastic when they were discussing it then he probably would’ve seen this coming a lot sooner.

Good Little Corporal by erenjaegrrr 

WC: -5k | CANON

Levi wants Eren to fuck him, hard. Eren accepts the challenge.

Hang-Ups by freshia {WC: -5k | AU}

How We Love by Pinkfxy {WC: -5k | AU}

I Don’t Mind Dying if It’s You by PorcelainBlue {WC: -5k | CANON}

If We Should Happen by Resmiranda {6k+ | CANON}

Interesting (Falling Deeper In Love) by TheSketch {WC: -5k | AU}

Interruptions by FoxofNineTails {WC: -5k | CANON}

Juicy Couture by shotgunsinlace {WC: 5k+ | AU}

Kissed by Fire by gayofthrones 

WC: -5k | AU

A Saturday afternoon between the sheets.

Knot a Word by shotgunsinlace 

WC: -5k | CANON

Hanji had warned him that, sooner or later, some biological quirk would be bound to show up in titan shifters. Of all the possibilities, Levi had never expected for this to actually be it.

Last Customer by mongoose_bite {WC: 5k+ | CANON} 

Late Bloomer by shotgunsinlace {WC: 5k+ | CANON}

Making a Mess by ryuusea {WC: -5k | CANON}

Morning Snack by ackermvn {WC: -5k | AU}

Nape by ryuusea 

WC: -5k | CANON

Levi wonders if it is ironic or just pure coincidence that Eren’s weakest spot is the back of his neck. He licks one, two stripes across that exposed nape, then another up, then down, reveling in how this always turns Eren into a keening mess in his arms.

No Rest for the Wicked by Azshalade 

WC: 8k+ | CANON

Levi just wants a good night’s sleep but you can’t always get what you want.

Open Book by morphemes 

WC: 8k+ | CANON

Eren has always thought Levi couldn’t express any sort of emotion, let alone show it, but, after Levi ignores him for three whole days and Eren demands an explanation, he’s led into a whole variety of emotions regarding his corporal.

Ousama Game by shiroyasha {WC: 8+ | CANON}

Power Struggle by erenjaegrrr {WC: -5k | CANON}

Quarter to Five by gayofthrones

WC: -5k | AU

I can barely breathe when you’re here loving me.

Salt on Your Skin by kirakiracats 

WC: 11k | AU

When people ask Levi about how his summer holiday went, he’ll say ordinary things about the weather, the food, and the hotel. But actually, the first thing that comes to his mind, and the one story he’ll never tell, is how Eren had been a horny little shit at the beach.

And Levi had gone along with it.

Surprises by mitsukoooo {WC: -5k | AU}

There’s a First Time for Everything by kiokushitaka {WC: -5k | CANON}

Until the Mountains Crumble to the Sea by ohheichoumyheichou {WC: -5k | CANON}

Yellow Wall by Trick_Fantasy {WC: 9k+ | AU}

Please note that the length of some of the multichapter fics is obviously going to change (same thing goes for the ratings). So, please don’t hold me to these word counts. Also, more fics may be added, because I am positive I have forgotten some. I sincerely hope this sates all of your ereri fanfic needs, because this took forFUCKINGever. And, what are art skillz bc look at my shit drawing omfg ahahhahahahahah.

Enjoy ~

  • Murdoc: How dare you? I have lived across thousands of lifetimes. I watched as Satan was cast from the Heavens to the fires below. I am all things evil and benign, the shadows at the foot of your bed. I am the creator of storms, the holder of El Diablo; with a flick of my wrist I bring hurricanes and destruction. I am a walking myth among men. When there is evil and chaos in this world REST ASSURED that it is the work of Murdoc Niccals! You weak, pathetic fool. You should never have awakened the beast.
  • Noodle:
  • Noodle:
  • Noodle: Okay, but are you gonna share your Pick n' Mix or not?
The Five Times You Kiss Poe Dameron(Skywalker!Reader x Poe Dameron)

Originally posted by the-return-of-the-imagines

Word Count: 2470

Summary: The five times that the reader shares a kiss with Poe Dameron, in order.

A/N: first kind of actual Poe Oneshot?? I’m so excited? I love this so much, omg. I’ve been seeing these “Five times” stories floating around tumblr and I just love them all so much. So, I decided to write my own!! I hope that you enjoy this!


Keep reading

  • hamilton: how dare you? i have lived across thousands of lifetimes. i watched as Satan was cast from the Heavens to the fires below. i am all things evil and benign, the shadows at the foot of your bed. i am the creator of storms, the holder of el diablo; with a flick of my wrist i bring hurricanes and destruction. i am a walking myth among men. when there is evil and chaos in this world REST ASSURED that it is the work of alexander hamilton! you weak, pathetic fool. you should never have awakened the beast.
  • burr: ...
  • burr: [sigh]
  • burr: okay, but are you gonna share your pick n' mix or not?
Ride a Winchester

Characters:  Dean x Reader

Summary:  This is for @ilostmyshoe-79‘s SPN Sutra challenge.  Thanks for including me, this was a lot of fun! The position I was given is “Reverse Cowgirl”.  If you haven’t’ tried this position, lawd, give it a go.  It’s one of my personal faves.

Word Count:  3689

Warnings:  SMUT, language, unprotected sex (wrap it up at home kids), also don’t drink and drive

As always, feedback is appreciated.  All those hearts and reblogs make my day, you all are awesome.

Tags are at the bottom.  If you’d like to be tagged/not tagged, please let me know!

Originally posted by carryoutmywaywardson

Ride a Winchester

“(Y/N), you ready?” Dean is pounding on the hotel door.

Checking yourself in the mirror quickly, you approve of what you see.  Tight jeans that show off that ass, tank top that is just cut low enough to not be too low and, of course, your cowgirl boots.  You head for the door, pulling it open and greeting the handsome hunter.  

“Yep, good to go!”

Dean’s smile dazzles you, it lights up his whole face.  You would think by now you’d be immune to his charms, but nope.  Every time you see him your heart races, you feel light-headed and giddy like a teenage girl.  Jesus Christ. That jaw, the stubble, those green fucking eyes.  Swoon.

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All my highlighted quotes from ‘Call Me By Your Name’ (the novel) PART 2

“If not later, Elio, when?”


“The look on his face became like the tiny snapshot of a beloved that soldiers take with them to the battlefield, not only to remember there are good things in life and that happiness awaits them, but to remind themselves that this face might never forgive them for coming back in a body bag.”


“If I could have him like this in my dreams every night of my life, I’d stake my entire life on dreams and be done with the rest.”


“‘People who read are hiders. They hide who they are. People who hide don’t always like who they are.’”


“‘Why? Because I think you can hurt me and I don’t want to be hurt.’”


“Grow up. I’ll see you at midnight.”


“But sitting here I knew I was experiencing the mitigated bliss of those who are too superstitious to claim they may get all they’ve ever dreamed of but are far too grateful not to know it could easily be taken away.”


“‘Me okay.’”


“What else is there to do but to respond in kind when someone touches your toes with his toes?”


“‘Call me by your name and I’ll call you by mine.’”


“He was not allowing me to forget him.”


“Perhaps the physical and the metaphorical meanings are clumsy ways of understanding what happens when two beings need, not just to be close together, but to become so totally ductile that each becomes the other.”


“He was my secret conduit to myself- like a catalyst that allows us to become who we are, the foreign body, the pacer, the graft, the patch that sends all the right impulses, the steel pin that keeps a soldier’s bone together, the other man’s heart that makes us more us than we were before the transplant.”


“‘I wanted you from day one.’”


“…crying because something was happening, and I had no idea what it was.”


“This was the best person I’d ever known in my life. I had chosen him well.”


“It sounded like a preamble to farewells.”


“…so that the very person who causes our torment by daybreak is the same who’ll relieve it at night?”


“I knew that our minutes were numbered, but I didn’t dare count them, just as I knew where all this was headed, but didn’t care to read the signposts.”


“I suddenly realized that we were on borrowed time, that time is always borrowed, and that the lending agency exacts its premium precisely when we are least prepared to pay and need to borrow more.”


“Instead, I squirreled away small things so that in the lean days ahead glimmers from the past might bring back warmth.”


“Bombs never fall on the same spot; this one, for all my premonitions, fell exactly in my hideaway.”


“…while I grabbed Mafalda’s knife from the kitchen and ripped out his heart, because that heart and his shirt were all I’d ever have to show for my life. A heart and a shirt.” (Cor cordium)


“The San Clemente Syndrome”


“Smile, and the world smiles back.”


“‘I turned down so many. Never went after anyone.’

‘You went after me.’

‘You let me.’”


“…sei un dissoluto…” (Debauched- indulging in or characterized by sensual pleasures to a degree perceived to be morally harmful; dissolute.)


“There was more to learn in this tiny crammed bookstore than in any of the mighty institutions across the Atlantic.”


“‘I wish I had one friend I wasn’t destined to lose.’”


“…but because by not planning to keep things alive, we were avoiding the prospect that they might ever die.”


“We were eloping together with return-trip tickets to separate destinations.”


“Whom else would I ever be able to call by my name?”


“‘I want you as both, or as in between.’”


“He came. He left. Nothing else had changed. I had not changed. The world hadn’t changed. Yet nothing would be the same. All that remains is dreammaking and strange remembrance.”


“…as if they belonged to another life, a life to which I had no access since it already belonged to the past.”


“‘Tomorrow is today,’ he replied.”


“I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering by taking it in small doses beforehand, but, as all superstitious people do, to see if my willingness to accept the very worst might not induce fate to soften its blow. Like soldiers trained to fight by night, I lived in the dark so as not to be blinded when darkness came. Rehearse the pain to dull the pain.”


“You lose it, as you always knew you would, and were even prepared to, but you can’t bring yourself to live with the loss.”


“‘…-everyday of my life,’ I said.

‘Everyday of mine too.’”


“‘I don’t want to lose you.’”


“‘You’re too smart not to know how rare, how special, what you two had was.’”


“‘Parce que c’etait lui, parce que c’etait moi.’” Because it was him, because it was me.


“Because he’s more myself than I am.”


“‘He was good, and you were both lucky to have found each other, because you too are good.’”


“‘Nature has cunning ways of finding our weakest spot.’”


“‘In your place, if there is pain, nurse it, and if there is a flame, don’t snuff it out, don’t be brutal with it. Withdrawal can be a terrible thing when it keeps us awake at night, and watching others forget us sooner than we’d want to be forgotten is no better. We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have no less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything- what a waste!’”


“‘Right now there is sorrow. I don’t envy the pain. But I envy you the pain.’”


“They all belonged to a lifetime ago.” (The San Clemente Syndrome)

photobook ➻ newt scamander one shot

Title: photobook

Prompt: Imagine your s/o is an immortal and you find a photo album full of pictures that look scarily like you from different time periods

Character: Newt ‘cinnamon roll’ Scamander  

Rating: T

Author: @porpentiny (me) 

Ok so lil bit of a modern au here, but I don’t really go into it so, yeah whatever.



When you started dating Newt Scamander, you had noticed his lovable little quirks; like how his eyes crinkled when he really smiled, or how he would leave his wand hanging from his lips when his hands were occupied, or how he knew how to calm any creature–including you–down. How he was always gazing at you for just a second too long, and how when his fingertips brush your soft skin, he’d always smile as if he knew something nobody else did.

You also noticed the polaroid camera he was never seen without.

He didn’t actually use it until you began dating, and ever since you did, he was always taking photos of you, scribbling down the year and place on it and without even letting you glance at it, it was pocketed and his arms were around your waist, mumbling an ‘I love you.” before you could ask to see it. 

You had yet to see any of the photos, and no matter how many times you asked about them, he would always just smile and shake his head, saying something along the lines of ‘my album isn’t quite finished yet, love, but when it is, I assure you that you can see it.’ which you never understood because he was always taking photos of you, and you didn’t know how many more his worn old album could take.

“Why do you take so many photos of me?” You questioned one winters day while you sat in-between his legs on a rich carpet, the heat of the coal fire dancing across your skin with his arms wrapped around you in an embrace with his chin on your shoulder.

“Because you’re beautiful,” He whispered, with a delicate kiss on the tip of your ear. 

It wasn’t until you were down in his case, searching for something in a clutter of mess, that you found it, hidden in a box, beneath an array of scattered newspapers, with dates on the front pages that you weren’t even alive for.

You opened the lid of the box, only to be met with a tattered old leather photo book, bursting at the seams with hundreds of pictures practically begging to be looked at. A mess of photographs littered to bottom of the box, as well, but you didn’t dare focus on them.

You slammed the lid down, sending newspapers flying in a cluster around you. You couldn’t. You shouldn’t.

But, something inside of you was desperately calling for it, so you slowly removed the lid once more with trembling hands and placed it ever so gently against a newspaper.

You reached into the box and when your fingertips brushed the cover, you instantly recoiled. This was private, Newt said he would show you when it was finished. 

But by the looks of the old box, it was finished, so with a steadying breath, you took the beaten old book in your hands. The air suddenly got very warm and you could hear your heart beat in your ears as the tension grew with every stuttering breath.

Your heart raced as you went to open it, feeling like you were trespassing on a part of Newt that he wasn’t ready to show you, making the book feel more heavy than it was in your sweaty palms.

Before you had time to chicken out, you flipped the first page open, only to be met with a photo of a girl and Newt with arms wrapped around each other, grinning ear to ear, laughing at something forgotten in time, snow falling around them.

But it wasn’t just any girl. It was you. You could tell by the way her nose curved and how she awkwardly placed her arms over Newts and how she leaned into Newt just like you did, and although things were different about her style, it was most definitely you.

Then you saw the date ‘1926, New York city’ scrawled across the bottom of the old page and blinked, confused. What?

You peeled back the next page apprehensively, and you saw a picture of a you once more, from the side, with an out of date haircut and an outfit you might see on The Great Gatsby. You were smiling and shoving the camera away from you, the tagline of this one was ‘1927, a night of dancing in London’ 

The next few pages were of you in various locations and you stumbled across one of you by yourself, grinning and dancing as you showed your hand to the camera, which was adorned by a lush diamond ring. This one was titled ‘1928, she said yes!’ 

The page beside it was you in a white gown, next to Newt who was wearing an uncharacteristic suit, the two of you caught in a kiss in front of a large church that you knew. 

You raised a hand to your mouth, letting your delicately moving fingers glide across the page, wild eyes roaming for an explanation but the only thing you could find was ‘1929, forever yours,

“Y/n, you haven’t seen my-” You heard Newt’s voice get louder as he came down the steps but you couldn’t bring yourself to close the book. His voice cut off and so did his footsteps as he caught you red handed.

You slowly turned to face him with teary eyes, his expression was stony with an underlying panic, eyes only daring to look at the book you had in your hands as none of you spoke.

“W-what is this?” You said softly, throat going suddenly dry as you silently pleaded for him to meet your eyes. Your hands were still shaking as you held tightly onto the album, afraid that it would disappear if you let your grip falter, even for a second.

“It’s my photo album,” He whispered, barely loud enough for you to hear him, but in the thick silence, you were listening out for his voice.

“Newt…” You didn’t outwardly ask it, not having the confidence to, but he understood. As he always did. He slowly made his way towards you, a shaky sigh leaving his lips as he got to the floor where you sat.

He reached into the box and pulled out an old crumpled piece of paper, and your eyes followed his shaking fingers as he pulled it into a viewable piece. There you were again, in drawing form, smiling for the artist in a piece titled ‘Y/N,’ and you decided to let him explain before you spoke.

“This was 1616, I was fifteen and so in love with you it was unhealthy,” He laughed drily as he leaned on the wall behind you. “Much the same as I am now,”

Your eyes flitted to his and you felt your heart break as you saw him with tears running down his cheeks. You slowly moved towards him and let your cheek fall against his chest, arm wrapping around his midsection as he went through his photos.

“How?” You said quietly, and he knew what you meant. The silence in the room was whispering a thousand things in your ears before he finally spoke.

“I don’t know.”

You lapsed into an uncomfortable silence once more and you further awaited explanation, listening to his heart beat as you waited for him to carry on.

“I-I meet with you in every lifetime I live, my life never ends and I have to watch as yours does. Every time,” His voice cracked with a sob and you waited patiently for him to continue, slowly rubbing over his shirt clad stomach.

“My love, I have watched you die, more times than any man should have to bear, and I will continue to watch you live, and die until my days run out, if you allow me to,” 

A silence followed, the only noise being your breathing and his sobs.

“I-I’ve tried to die along with you, but it never works. It never works!” He fisted his hair and shook his head, letting all of his emotions come free in one moment. 

You slid up the wall, pulling his arm away from his head calmly and pressing his calloused palms against your chest, letting him feel your heart beating.

“I-immortal?” You questioned, simply guessing at this point. It was rare, but it could happen to some wizards, and it was usually thought of as a gift from the gods above.

His glistening eyes met yours and it was all the confirmation you needed to tell you that no, it was a curse. You pulled him towards you and kissed his forehead lovingly, petting his curls as he choked out more sobs. You didn’t want to imagine all he’s seen throughout his lifetime.

“I’m here, I always will be,” You whispered sweet nothings into his hair, kissing him every few minutes until he was finally calm.

You took his chin and tilted it up so he was looking at you, with wet eyes and puffy cheeks. You slowly leaned forward, capturing his lips in a delicate kiss that didn’t last long enough for him to return.

“I will always love you, in every life time, forever; if you’ll only return it to me,” You said against his lips, feeling the rawness of his emotions.

He placed a salty kiss against your lips, one that you retaliated immediately. His soft lips against yours telling you everything you needed to hear.

Newt slowly pulled away, breathing heavily as he pressed his forehead against yours;

“My love for you is eternal.”

PSA to those who stick their phone in their bras

STOP. HALT ALL BRA-STUFFING WITH PHONES INSTANTLY.

My tennis coach’s sister has breast cancer, and when she had an x-ray of the tumor taken, it was found to be the size of a rectangle of approximate smartphone size. She then confirmed that when she exercised, she had a habit of putting her phone in her sports bra.

It’s no secret that phones have radiation, so the fact that they can cause tumors is no real surprise. My aunt has cancer as well, and while the cause has not yet been confirmed, she had also been undergoing procedures that involved a lot of medicine and radiation before. Cell phones, while seemingly harmless, can deliver the same danger in small doses over time.

Please, please, PLEASE take care of your own bodies and avoid keeping your phones and electronics in pockets, waistbands, etc. when possible. Cancer is not a joke. Despite all the movies and books written about it, the actual thing is infinity times worse. Watching a loved one go through it has been devastating, and no one should deserve to go through it just because of some bad habit you didn’t know the consequences of. It’s not worth a lifetime of pain and suffering, and it’s definitely not worth your life.