things that really creeped me out as a kid

as an adult, i am very wary about reblogging posts about the kids from It or Stranger Things. I love them, don’t get me wrong, but they are kids. Literal children. Some people have a strange obsession with them, and to be honest it sorta creeps me out. When I look at them, I see kids that I would protect and try to help. Babies. I’d adopt them in a heartbeat and keep them safe, but a lot of these posts don’t reflect that feeling. Rambling under cut.

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Angel With A Shotgun // The Preacher’s Daughter Finale [A Mitch Rapp Smut]

Author: @minhosmeanhoe

Series: Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six

Relationship: Mitch Rapp x Reader / Mitch Rapp x OFC

Warnings: Violence, Death, Mentions Of Sex, Angst, Emotional Torture, Super Cute Mitch Rapp, and Swearing. 

Word Count: 9,347

Song: I’ll Be Good by Jaymes Young

A/N: Happy American Assassin premiere weekend and happy belated birthday @stilinski-jpeg! I really hope you guys enjoy the ending to this series that I have grown to love so much. Thank you for all of the support, all of the kind comments and all of the love towards it. Because of your never ending positivity, I have decided to make a sequel series to this. I don’t know when it’ll be out because I still have a lot to plan, but there already is a title which I won’t say because then it’ll be a spoiler for the ending of this one lol. Thank you for reading, I love you guys so much.

Once, when I was around the age of twelve, I almost drowned to death and I remember it like it had happened to me just yesterday. I was swimming around with my closest friends in the world, one of them being Nia. We all played in my pool and were having the times of our lives, not knowing what would be happening in the following seconds as I accidentally slipped and hit my head on the edge of the pool. Immediately getting knocked out, my entire body fell limp into the water.

No one had realized there was something wrong and I was forced to suffer alone. The only thing that surrounded me was absolute darkness. I could hear my friends laughing and playing amongst themselves, but I couldn’t actually see them. I remember feeling like my head was on the verge of exploding as the lack of air left me in complete agony. Everything burned and I had never felt more miserable until, finally, someone noticed me and pulled me out of the water. They breathed life back into my lungs, my eyes eventually opening as I felt the darkness disappear away. Instead, the sight of a worried Nia hovering over me as she performs CPR on me took over my vision.

That moment of complete torture is exactly what I’m going through right now, but this time Nia isn’t here to pull me out of it.

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The Signs as Guys I’ve Had Things With

Aries: He and I are literally the same person. He is super precious and adorable. His music taste is fucking amazing. Has a contagious smile. LITERALLY THE NICEST HUMAN EVER! He’s my favorite. He loves cars and it’s the cutest thing ever.

Taurus: This fool is literally wild! He’s one of my best friends now. Got hella drunk at a party when he found out I didn’t like him. Kinda taught me how to drive. He also owes me $5 for a milkshake from Denny’s. Likes to have deep conversations. He gets shook everytime I have the aux cord because he thinks my music is the shit.

Gemini: Very closed off and couldn’t really hold on a conversation. Posts very confusing Snapchat stories. Likes to boast about his current girlfriend even though they’ve never met. Stood me up even though I saw him where we were supposed to hang out at the same day.

Cancer: Super sweet kid. He is super frustrating sometimes because he likes to piss people off on purpose. One of my closest friends now. I always catch him staring at my boobs. Texted me last night saying: “Can I have one titty pic?”

Leo: He was 6′4 and thought he was the shit. Lied to me about loving Game of Thrones and said he watched the first season on Netflix, UM EXCUSE ME BITCH Game of Thrones has never been on Netflix. Missed me with that shit. He loved to send unwanted dick pics. His dick is crooked af. Only talked to me when he wanted.

Virgo: We talked for like 2 weeks  and he stopped when I wouldn’t send nudes. Works at the movie theater. He still has a thing for me and he wants to fuck. Gives off a creeper type vibe. He was hella following me at the last party I was at. Lowkey think he tried to get me drunk.

Libra: Super strange kid. Like he and really vibed together but I always got a creeped out feeling from him. He seems to think my personality changes a lot and loves that about me. Thinks my boobs are fake. Smokes hella weed and gets drunk at work.

Scorpio: BIGGEST PERV EVER! Takes everything I say and turns it sexual. Likes to hit on almost every single girl. Gets offended if you don’t like his music. Thinks he’s hella funny, but he’s not. For some reason, if you mess with him you get instant karma?

Sagittarius: Very boring at conversation. Had a mediocre YouTube channel. He worked at Best Buy. Thought I was hilarious. His car got broken into at In-N-Out and his drone was stolen. Now to me, that was a sign telling him to stop making those shitty YouTube videos but he didn’t agree.

Capricorn: This kid made a lot of death jokes and it got concerning. He and I shared a mutual obsession with Jake Gyllenhaal. Had Daddy issues. He was 6′5 and worked at a pizza place. Loved his Subaru a little too much.

Aquarius: Very into loyalty. He’s one of my best friend now. Calls his friends his family. Love him very much but didn’t pursue it because I didn’t want to ruin the friendship. 

Pisces: Shyest human in the world. Very caring but makes not one bit of sense. Asked me “if it hurt when I fell from heaven”. Loves Taco Bell. He protected me from a creepy kid in our class. Only person to ever ask me if I was okay when I wasn’t. Kind of a hoe.

anonymous asked:

Skills people didn't expect Vader to have: breaking codes, splicing, mechanics, Huttese, a lot about Naboo?, unintentionally creeping people out when staying facts about Palpatine ("he'll replace me with you- said to Luke), art, calming down toddlers and babies, entertaining children and babies and being nice

Haha, yeah! I mean, I don’t think Vader really has the capacity to interact with children in the years that he’s Vader– and in an AU situation, I think it would take a very, very long time to jump that particular nightmare hurdle– but those other things he can probably do. There was a time when Anakin was able to interact with kids, but it was like another life, before he was a monster. If he was forced into it, I think it would at minimum make him extremely uncomfortable, which is not ideal because Vader has exactly one outlet for his discomfort and that’s violence. Nobody wants Darth Vader to suffer a traumatic flashback to that time he sold his soul and sealed the bargain by slaughtering a dozen children. 

I think Vader would surprise people with how smart he is. I get the impression that while people who worked closely with him understood him as a tactical genius and a generally cunning agent of death, a lot of the Empire’s higher-ups thought of him as dumb muscle or a rabid animal. He wasn’t willing to play politics, he didn’t speak much and when he did it was slow and very formal, he had no compunctions about wreaking violence on officers rather than answering their verbal barbs… I don’t articulate it well, but I feel like part of Vader’s political disfavor among various moffs and governors was that he had no impulse to put a veneer of civility or sophistication on his actions. I imagine this was interpreted as indicating that he didn’t have the ability to do so, rather than that he didn’t care to. 

How Dead Hannah Baker keeps the Manic Pixie Dream Girl Trope Alive

*pictured above: Hannah Baker (Katherine Langford) from 13 Reasons Why


I know that some of you may be wondering what exactly is a Manic Pixie Dream Girl. Well there’s no text book definition but here’s one I found online from

“A Manic Pixie Dream Girl or MPDG, is a term coined by film critic Nathan Rabin after seeing Elizabethtown. It refers to “that bubbly, shallow cinematic creature that exists solely in the fevered imaginations of sensitive writer-directors to teach broodingly soulful young men to embrace life and its infinite mysteries and adventures.” A pretty, outgoing, whacky female romantic lead whose sole purpose is to help broody male characters lighten up and enjoy their lives.”

Now that you have an idea of what this is I’ll start by giving you examples. Usually the Manic Pixie Dream Girl, MPDG for short, is only there so the nerdy usually white male that is obsessed with them can grow from the experience with them. Now I know you’re thinking “how exactly do I spot one of these creatures?” Well guys it’s very easy and I’ll give you some tips. Most MPDG’s are white, have a wild outlook on the world, and are deemed gorgeous by the general public. 

*pictured above: Clementine Kruczynski (Kate Winslet) and Joel Barish (Jim Carrey) in the film Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

The first MPDG I can think of is Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless mind. She is a wild says whatever is on her mind kind of girl and meets poor Joel on the train. This film happens through flashbacks and dreams showing how happy she made him. The relationship went sour which it usually does with a MPDG and they both have each other erased from their memories. Dramatic, I know, but losing her and getting her back helps Joel in some crazy way. It’s like without her he can’t fully live his life and that’s just sad.

*pictured above: Tom (Joseph Gordon Levitt) and Summer (Zooey Deschanel) in 500 Days of Summer

People love this movie and don’t even realize that Summer is problematic as fuck. Summer is this cool girl who doesn’t believe in love and basically drags poor Tom around for you fucking guessed it, 500 days. Tom thinks that Summer is the one for him and tries to date her and show her love exists. Even though they do end up dating things fall apart because cool, secure, witty as all hell Summer is still scared of love. I mean I thought that was a LA thing. It doesn’t take Tom to realize how pathetic he is until he sees Summer at a park AND REALIZES SHE FUCKING GOT MARRIED. Summer’s excuse is that she wasn’t sure about Tom but she was sure about her husband now…. LOL need I say more? 

*pictured above: Margo (Cara Delevigne) and Quentin (Nat Wolff) in Paper Towns.

Last example is John Green’s book turned film Paper Towns. Quentin has been in love with the popular girl next door Margo. One random night Margo climbs into Quentin’s window and asks him to get revenge on her now ex boyfriend. They spend the whole night at the store getting supplies, ruining the boy’s car, and looking over the city they live in. Margo feels stuck where she is and unlike feels different tan her friends. Spoiler alert: she’s not. At the end of the night they both go home and of course nerdy Quentin is blissed the fuck out. Before I go in on this, we have to acknowledge that all of John Green‘s main characters are MPDG’s. It’s basically his forte. But I digress. Quentin wakes up and, surprise, Margo has gone missing. Quentin is determined to find her and believes that she left clues for him. Quentin his two friends and Margo’s bestie go on a roadtrip from florida to upstate New York and find themselves while trying to find Margo. His friends eventually leave him because no way in teen rom com hell are they going to miss the prom. Quentin stays and eventually finds the girl of his dreams. Turns out Margo didn’t want to be found at all and just like Tom in 500 days of Summer Quentin looks like a fucking dumb ass. Quentin makes it home in time for prom and enjoys it with his friends cause in the end that’s all he really needed… but it took a cross country road trip trying to find a selfish teen girl who doesn’t care about you to figure that out. Nice!

*pictured above: Clay Jensen (Dylan Minnette) and Hannah Baker (Katherine Langford) in 13 Reasons Why

As we all know Jay Asher’s book 13 Reasons why has been turned into a tv show on Netflix. The premise is that high schooler Hannah Baker has killed herself and left 13 tapes for certain people to listen to. If you’re on this tape, you’re one of the reasons why she’s gone. Creepy right? Well in the book, which is only 288 pages, Hannah is a sweet girl who seemed to have the worst time of her damn life. The book is short so it seems like every event that happened to Hannah happens like one day after the other. Clay listens to his friend’s tapes in one night and it really hits you in the gut. Personally I like the book better but I am here to address the show. If you want to read my full opinion on the entire show you can do so by clicking here

The problem with the Tv series is that by stretching the fuck out of this book they have to add on to the characters. Unfortunately Hannah is made into a MPDG from beyond the grave. In the show Hannah is deemed pretty by everyone around her. If the high school jocks think you’re hot, you’re golden am I right? What makes Hannah a MPDG is the way she treats poor Clay Jensen. Clay is the main character in the show and you find out what happens to Hannah by watching him listen to the tapes. SInce it takes Clay fucking weeks to listen to 13 DAMN TAPES only through flashbacks do you get to see what Hannah is truly like. Hannah on the show confused me after I watched it. I was like “Why don’t I like her?” Don’t get me wrong I felt for the girl and everything that happened was horrible but something was just off. She talked to Clay all the time in witty banter and even gave him a nickname. There were so many chances where she could have just kissed him or got alone time but she didn’t. The other problem with Hannah Is that she was so confident and cool, and filled with teen angst, it didn’t make sense for her to care about what people thought. It’s like she had two personalities. When we see her with Clay she’s this smart funny girl who seemed unattainable but when we see her with virtually anyone else she’s insecure and dying for attention from any popular boy in school. Hannah makes it seem as if Clay isn’t good enough for her when in reality he’s the only person she has. In the 12th episode while Hannah is taking a walk she ends up at a house party where all the popular kids are. Even though she thinks Clay hates her at this point she could’ve tried to talk things out with him. It just frustrates me that she would go to a rapist’s house cause she’s that desperate for attention. Why fight for these douche bags that have done nothing but hurt you instead of fighting for Clay? 

Clay shows character progression only when he’s listening to the tapes. Hearing his dream girl tell the stories before her untimely death makes Clay a better person to people around him. I mean that is the point of all this but at the same time, it shouldn’t take tapes from a girl who has committed suicide to realize that hey, high school is hard don’t be a fucking asshole to people. Clay also grows some balls while listening to the tapes. He basically yells in the middle of the school hall and even lowkey bullies this kid Tyler. I mean Tyler was a creep but bullying someone would be the last thing on my agenda while listening to a dead girl’s tapes. I wrote this for me to get my thoughts out cause everyone keeps asking me about this show. Every conversation I have I always say that I didn’t really like Hannah so if you think Hannah kind of sucks I’m here with you. Hannah is the most twisted MPDG ever and yes it’s because she’s dead. Clay only grows while listening to these tapes which is kind of in a way fucked up. Even though Clay, unlike the book, gets justice for two sexually assaulted girls and Hannah’s life it shouldn’t take Hannah’s 13 tapes to grow. Hannah killing herself should’ve made everyone change and grow on their own.

I know at this point you’re probably saying “ I read this long ass article what is the point?!” The point is that women are not objects. Being a woman is hard and having to grow up is truly a journey. You have media constantly showing you how the perfect woman acts or talks or dresses. Going through high school you have to deal with the pressure of society and unfortunately care about what your peers think. I grew up from my own damn experiences. I didn’t just find myself cause I left a boyfriend or cause I cut my hair I learned that I am what I am and I can’t change that and I’m very happy with who I turned out to be. This is especially hard to do when you’re a black girl like me raised in an all white community. Why must men in these movies need a girl for them to realize who they are? I’m not saying it’s easy to be a boy but come on dude the girl of your dreams isn’t gonna finally give you this sense of Omg I know what my purpose in life is. Your dream girl is not your mom teaching you about life. You know what’s right and what’s wrong without a girl whispering you to the right direction in your ear. You can only figure out who you are by being you and it is completely possible for films and TV shows to show this without a MPDG. I know the show 13 Reasons Why is supposed to show how small things matter and can snowball into this big thing. I get it I really do. The problem is that they could’ve shown that making Hannah solely the victim and not a jaded Manic Pixie Dream Girl. 

an idea: yoongi works at a convenience store because he needs to save money for something he really wants, but the thing is, he’s the only employee around when things get busy. he may be grumpy / someone who doesn’t like to have a nice chat with customers because y'know, priorities. he needs to serve them as quick as possible or else the queue will get longer and he doesn’t like that.

but the thing is, there is always a guy who always tries (keyword: tries) to talk to him but he quickly shuts down the conversation asking “is that all, sir?” and calls for the next customer.

until one day, he goes to the convenience store for his shift only to be told that a new employee will be there to help him already. he simply nodded, kinda thankful that somebody’s already there to help him (so that he can chill a bit even if there are customers around).

when he meets the new guy, he’s a bit taken a back because it’s “him”


“hello, my name is kim taehyung, please take care of me” and giving him the biggest smile he’d ever seen (minus hoseok’s).

“ah, yeah~ im yoongi”

“I know.”

yoongi just looked at him, still smiling at him

well, he’s okay so no worries, yoongi thought.

and soon, they became close (blame taehyung and his social skills) which yoongi kinda expected, given the fact that this was the same guy who was trying to talk to him for a month.

“hey, if you don’t mind me asking, why did you decide to work here? do you need to pay student loans too?”

taehyung suddenly laughed at his words which confused yoongi, he didn’t speak until taehyung stopped his fit

“ah sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you but you’re just too cute sometimes”

yoongi pouts, not really happy to be called “cute”

“yah! just answer the damn question”

taehyung smiled warmly at him, and yoongi wouldn’t tell him that his heart kinda skipped a beat

“it’s because I wanted to talk to you, and get closer to you…” taehyung admitted shyly “but since you always looked so busy, I guess my failed attempts made me do it”

“what the hell?” yoongi muttered, unable to grasp the ridiculous idea that somebody would go as far to do that just to get close to him?

“hey~ please don’t think I’m a creep or a stalker! I just honestly wanted to talk to you, is all!” taehyung said in a hurry, thinking that he just scared off yoongi

“ah.. no.. I mean.. really?” great, yoongi just lost the ability to construct a proper sentence


and well, you guys know the drill. taehyung asks yoongi out on a date which our grumpy boy accepted. but looks like taehyung will never stop surprising him.




taehyung pouts “I am not a brat…”

and yoongi thought he might be overreacting (he is) but yeah, he cannot get mad at him for keeping things a secret because the kid only wants to be with him (and yes, he’s not complaining because he wanted to be with him too when he saw that boxy smile of his)

reyskywalkerakatherealmvp  asked:

hey!!! slightly odd request but do you have any cutesy fluffy Halloween headcanons for joyfire (especially kory) or just jayroy??? if so, I'd love to hear them 😊😊😊🍂🍂🍁🍁👻👻

*rubs me gay hands together* i gotchu raye

·first things first, halloween in gotham? terrifying. cant tell the drunk college kids in costume from the murderous wack jobs.
·jason decides to spend halloween in gotham because it’s open season on creeps in knock off joker costumes trying to mess with kids’ fun and bruce absolutely cannot stop him

·ofc kory and roy decide to join him- they wanna help. roy never really had much chance to enjoy halloween festivites and both he and kory wanna watch out for the kiddos and make sure they have a good time

·so they patrol gotham for a little while (managing to send a dozen or so would-be-murderers-and-kidnappers in the gcpd’s direction) before deciding to turn in for the night, maybe entertain some trick-or-treaters which roy is NOT enthusiastic about because that means sharing the candy. he deserves candy too.

·they end up breaking into staying in dick’s apartment in gotham for the night since he’s off dragging the younger batkids around the less-hostile parts of the city for halloween fun

·kory manages to convince roy to share the candy they bought with the trick-or-treaters

·"roy you cannot possibly need this much sugar??“,“i dont necessarily NEED it but i WANT it???!?”,“don’t be a killjoy.”

·jason compulsively ends up cleaning dick’s apartment because jesus christ this man is a mess and discovers his closet of disguises for undercover missions

·which of course leads to all three of them getting dressed up in costume.

·roy calls dressing as james bond. “-you guys can be my bond girls-”,“not fucking likely!!”,“but jay-baby you’d look good in a dress just saying-”,“i will kick you!! i’ll do it!!”

·kory finds the discowing costume and nothing jason and roy say talks her out of putting that thing on. “it is funny. i find it funny.”,“what it is is a nightmare kory. why does he even still have that.”

·jason abandons the disguise closet and goes for a drawer of dick’s old clothes. “jay, where’s your costume???”, “*dressed in a polkadot shirt, jeans nd loafers* this is my costume. i’m a walking disaster.”

·they weren’t really expecting many trick-or-treaters but apparently every kid in gotham’s orphanages knows where dick grayson lives and decide to pay the apartment a visit.

·jason tells them he’s dick’s brother and he’s filling in for him tonight and no one questions it because bruce wayne has a l o t of kids.

·the kids absolutely adore kory??? especially the little ones, and kory adores them too. one little girl shows up in a starfire costume and kory dumps half the candy bowl in her bag while trying not to cry tears of joy.

·on another note, steph and cass show up (dressed as sailor uranus and sailor neptune bc they like to couples coordinate their halloween costumes every year) and jason has to bribe steph for all he’s worth to make sure she doesn’t expose him dressed in dick’s travesty of an outfit to the entire family.

·she makes away with fifty bucks, a half off coupon to the batburger, and a promise that if she ever says a word jason WILL tell bruce it was her who spray painted the bat mobile purple, not the joker

·when midnight hits, they all curl up on the couch under like five thousand blankets because dick’s apartment is fucking freezing and jason has no idea what IS a thermostat and what’s actually just a security switch that alerts the bat family that his apartment is under attack.

·they end up watching cheesy halloween movies for the rest of the night while jason and roy fight over what’s left of the candy and kory just falls asleep across their laps.

·dick walks into the apartment the next morning and almost has a heart attack, not because his brother and his partners are asleep on his couch but because someone freaking reorganised his apartment and now he has no idea where anything is.

·they wake up about an hour later and without even saying a word they change clothes and leave. dick is fukcgn shook.

·all in all it was a great night, except jason and roy have sugar hangovers and kory is smug as hell abt it like “i warned you. i told the both of you did i not. three bags of chocolate is too much.”,“oh yeah well who’s the killjoy now?”,“with that attitude?? it is still most certainly you.”

It’s been a few days since your last dream and the strange email from “VoDKa” You haven’t been getting much sleep since that day and you started to grow very exhausted.

You’ve been researching more on the topic and naturally found yourself being pulled in by Dylan. You found yourself forgetting that he was a killer. You could only focus on his human side. You became protective over a boy who is long dead and very time you saw a nasty comment on the boy you grew sad. You know what he did is wrong. The victims shouldn’t have suffered the way they did, but you also knew your boy was hurting as well.

The day became night very fast. You spent the last few hours watching a few documentaries and one movie called “Zero Day” You soon grew tired as a late Saturday night became an early Sunday morning. You shut off your techs and soon feel asleep.

You found yourself on the auditorium stage of Columbine. You looked at the watch you had on and saw that it was the block you had off. You searched for your cell phone in your back pocket and jacket but it wasn’t there. You automatically knew you had went back in time once again. You didn’t panic as much since this happened to you last time, but you were still a bit creeped out.

You got off the stage and walked towards the exit when the door flew open. You saw a familiar face and relaxed the best you could. The face belonged to Dylan and you grew a big smile. He eyed you a bit trying to remember you before he gave you a big toothy grin.

“Hey y/n I haven’t seen you in forever.”

You blushed when he remembered your name.

“Yea sorry about that I haven’t really been around.”
“You’re telling me. Hey y/n l got fix a few things in the sound room before the theater kids come in. Wanna give me some.. Uh… Company?”

He fixed his hair underneath his backwards hat and gave a shy smile. You nodded in approval and followed him into the sound room.

“So what do you do in here”
“Oh uh..I do alot of things. Like balancing out the sound. Uh… Making sure the mics are level.. Sometimes lighting and sound affects. You know ”

His hands were dancing around the soundboard. Sliding things up or down. Switching things on and off. His hands knew their way around the board like it was a first language. You saw how focus he was and how his jew cletched each time he fumbled on something.

“So y/n do you actually go here? The teacher seemed a bit confused last time in class. And you haven’t showed up since.”

You were taken back at his question not knowing how to respond. You bit your bottom lip trying to thing of an excuse or a reason on why you don’t come often.

“Well..uh.. Yea I do go to this school in general.”

He looked back you when you said “in general.” He had a confused and puzzled look on his face. Pretty much asking you to explain.

“I do go to this school.. Just not yet”

He was now looking completely in your direction with his back facing the soundboard.

“Okay y/n… Uh please explain because you are confusing the crap outta me” he gave a smile chuckle almost as if he was making fun of himself for not understanding.

“I’m not from this… Uh time?”

You weren’t really sure how to explain it. You weren’t even sure if you are actually going back in time or if you are having very vivid dreams. You deicided to just spill the truth since you figured no harm done. It could just be a big dream anyways.

He looked at you wide eyes. Part of it in curiosity and the other just thinking you’re pulling a game on him you deicide too just lay it all on him. Everything you can say.

“I actually am from..the future… I guess”
“Okay.. Then prove it ” he gave you a big smile and laughing abit. You were almost positive that he just didn’t believe you.

“Okay I guess I will. I know that there will be a black President. Uh Donald Trump will follow soon after.”

“Sorry y/n. I don’t believe you for even a second” he let out a small laugh. He was about to turn back around but you wanted him to know that you were just goofing around.
“I know that your mother calls you sunshine boy and I know about…. your NBK plans”

Slience consumed the small room and Dylan looked down towards the ground.

“How do you know about that.”

“Like I said I’m not really from this time. Alteast not as a teenager.”

“So when are you from and do me and Reb pull it off is that why you know about it?”

You completely ignore the second part of his question. You didn’t wanna give him confidence in that stupid plan. You want to stop it at all cause. You thought maybe you should tell him that he failed and was caught or something that would stop him from going through with it.

“I’m from 2017…”

“Oh.. That’s pretty cool…”

You soon woke up with your mother yelling your name saying that it was time for breakfast. You stood just sitting on your bed for a little trying to wake up alittle. You checked you phone and saw another strange email. But this time your remember that in your last dream you gave him your email… You still aren’t sure if he is emailing you in real time or what.

Are you really from the future? Can you still get this email?

(Your Online User):

I went on my first date with all the dads. First impressions:

Mat is super awkward and adorable and I love him. Not my favorite and I couldn’t figure out his mini-game, but I enjoyed his date immensely. His daughter’s a cutie I hope I see more of her.

Craig’s daughters are all adorable enough to make up for his health-nut thing. Bro. Bro! Bro. I accept this facet of him wholeheartedly. I especially appreciate him doing the dad thing after hitting my dad in the head with a softball.

Hugo’s son is a huge dick who could stand a good smack??? But Hugo’s a giant nerd who loves fish I dig it. Mini-game was also hard but in the end penguins were walking around with a wing full of cash so who was the real loser here? Not me.

Damien started off weird and ended weird but he’s an adorable blushing nerd and I love him. Also OH NO I KNOCKED OVER THE GARGOYLE literally has anything been more me. Also his son is a goober THEY MENTION THERAPY AND IT’S NOT BAD I cried a little honestly.

Robert??? Has no children?????? Have I just not met the child yet????? He also hangs out with Mary I don’t much care for her. But Robert’s tsundere which intrigues me. Also he’s passionate about movies and he gave me a bottle of white zinfandel which is my fave in real life so he gets a pass for the Mary thing.

Brian’s daughter is the ABSOLUTE CUTEST I am fucking dying my daughter’s teaching Daisy how to be a normal kid I could cry. Not really on board with the competition but that could just be a me thing. Brian’s a big ol’ teddy bear tho I can’t wait for our second date.

Joseph is super sweet? I love the twins. He needs to CHILL OUT though I wasn’t fucking lying I made up a whacky story FOR REAL JOSEPH LYING IS NOT ON THE LEVEL OF MURDER AND ADULTERY. Other than that he was a peach. Still don’t like Mary honestly she creeps me out but whatever.

I’m hoping to finish second dates with all of them tomorrow. :3

True Story

One time I was working in some theatre productions. I was one of the chorus girls, and even though I didn’t think I was that great, this guy thought I was and he helped me get better. Don’t ask me why but I thought he was a friend of my dad’s. Turns out he was just some nerd who harasses my bosses. But he was pretty good at singing. He covers up his face bc he had some problems w/ it.

Then this dude I knew as a kid started donating money to us. Weird, I know. So like, we had a sort of on-off relationship (we’re together now but I’ll get into that later) and just when things were really getting busy at work, he calls the police on my creep tutor. And THEN in the middle of the next show the creep kidnaps me. (EDIT: Forgot to mention all the property damage, blackmail, and murder he was involved in too)

I was so not ready for this! Like, he was going to crush my crush if I didn’t marry him or smth. So then I looked him in the eye and said it was in his heart that the true distortion lay and not in his face. Then I kissed him and he was so touched he let us go. 

Then the whole opera house clapped.

anonymous asked:

Probably one the quickest but everlasting scenes from Halloween is when Laurie takes off Michaels mask to reveal what appears to be a normal face but is actually much more creepier then his mask

It’s a great moment. One of the best things about Michael, I think, is that he doesn’t actually look abnormal under the mask. He just looks like a person. It makes the blankness of the mask make that much more sense. There’s a human being under there, but nothing inside him. Just emptiness. It’s a very quick, great moment, one of the only moments in the movie that genuinely creeped me out when I first saw it as a kid and I didn’t even really know why. 

One of the first interviews I ever did was with Tony Moran, who played the unmasked Michael in that scene. Surprisingly, it looks like that can still be found here.  

There are a lot of little moments in the original Halloween that are absolutely fantastic. One of my favorites has to be when Annie’s talking on the phone, passes by the window and Michael’s there, passes by again and he’s gone, all in the same shot.

And, of course, the head tilt he does just after he kills Bob. Even though we don’t know what he’s thinking, that’s one of the first times we have any bit of character detail from Michael, just watching him study his own handiwork. I love that showing a human face later on doesn’t take away from the blankness of the shape at all, it just helps to further illustrate everything Loomis has been saying. 

New Life | Legolas Imagine #1

Originally posted by ginger-girl-world

            Hey Ya’ll! For my first new story on this blog I decided to convert one of my old Legolas Fanfictions into an imagine! Let me know what you think, and please send in any requests that you have!!

Part 2

           My arrow whistled through the air, brushing my cheek as it flew. It hit the target; on I’d painted on the tree for lack of a better option, dead center.  I lowered my bow, feeling a smile creep onto my face. That was my third perfect shot it a row.

           I’d fallen in love with archery after watching the Lord of the Rings when I was a kid. Over the years, it had become one of the only things that really brought me joy.

           I moved forward and yanked my arrow out of the tree, putting it in the quiver with my only other arrow. Matt had broken the other one a few days ago, so I was going to be extra careful with these.

           I stepped back onto the back porch and into the kitchen door. I store all of my archery stuff in my bedroom, and then took it to competitions with me instead of renting the crappy ones the school provided.

           “Y/N? Y/N, where are you?” Matt’s voice shouted from the living room.

           “I’m in here, Mattie. What’s up?” I said timidly.

           He was silent for a second. “Can you make me some tacos?”

           “I have homework, Mattie.”

           This time there was no pause before his answer. “Make me some fucking tacos or you aren’t going to be going anywhere!” He practically screamed.

           “Of course, sorry.” I hurried to grab the container of taco meat out of the fridge, and set about making a meal.

           Our house was small, and the kitchen was absolutely miniscule. After our parents had died, Matt sold the house and bought us this smaller one, to cut costs he’d said.

Keep reading

cryptoatsume  asked:

vampire, zombie, eerie, pumpkin?

Vampire: Which one are you? Early bird or night owl?
night owl by default lol

Zombie: What is one food you always overeat?
uhh i’m not sure i dont really overeat but i eat fries a lot if that counts???

Eerie: One thing that always creeps you out?
when kids say creepy things especially things that relate to the paranormal idk man i’m fine with it normally but it gives me chills when a child mentions it

Pumpkin: What is your favorite food around the holidays?
i dont like holiday food

anonymous asked:

ur comment on why u hate kids so much Just because they LITERALLY dont know any better like u were a kid once too dumbass u just never grew up apparently. also i can be grossed out at both ur url and creeps who send idols nsfw shit u fool im capable of doing two things at once 😂😒

Quite the opposite actually; i grew up quicker than most kids. And unlike seemingly most kids nowadays, i have parents who raised me right so i didnt used to run around restaurants and scream in a goddammed pram at aged 9. I can do two things at once too; i can hate kids whilst simultaneously not abusing them so really what’s the problem here? 🤔

I’m old. For a girl, I’m old. I’m supposed to have it all together by now. I’m supposed to have a husband and a career and kids and I don’t. I don’t, I’m so – I’m lost….I will do the same things day in and day out until I am too old and gray to fly away.

The beginning of today’s episode really got to me – Wendy’s failure, how hard she tries, the pressure to have it all (before you’re 30) and especially the fear that nothing new is ever going to happen to her. I get it. I’ve been there. I am there.

Why does it feel like everyone else’s life is moving so fast, while yours seems to creep along at a snail’s pace? 

Daddy’s Girl (Part 11 of ?)

A/n: I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. It’s the big reveal and the story is coming to a close pretty soon. Thanks for all the amazing feedback and encouragement on this story, guys. It means a lot to me. You’re the best!!

When Owen walks up to you, you can’t take your eyes off of him. He looks nice….really nice. Something about him seems different and not just the dark wash jeans crisp buttondown. After a moment of staring, you hold back a laugh as you come to the realization that he looks clean. It’s not that Owen always looks filthy, but when you see him at work in the mornings he’s always already got something on him: peppering of dirt from the drive, some grease on his hands (you assume is from working on that motorcycle of his) and his hair is usually a mess. However, when he cleans up, he cleans up good.

“I know.” He says with a smirk as he gets to you, “Pretty dashing, huh?” He asks and raises his eyebrow at you, waiting for your response. You just laugh and pat him on the chest.

“Let’s get inside, yeah? Don’t wanna keep him waiting.” You say with a  grimace that Owen catches immediately.

“If he’s inside, why did you wait out here for me?” He asks suspiciously but you just shake your head.

“Let’s get this over with.” You say as you drag him behind you and into the restaurant. Here goes nothing, you think to yourself as you find your dad’s table. The both fo you walk up to him as he stands and reaches out a hand for Owen.

“Owen, nice to see you again.” He says, holding back a smirk as he shakes his hand, and then he turns to you. You step forward and he puts an arm around you, kissing you on the head. “Pumpkin’”

You can feel Owen’s wide eyes boring into you, wondering what’s happening so you smile softly and lean back. “Hey Dad.”  

You’ve been so careful about keeping this secret. You didn’t want to be treated different because of who your father is, so you assumed in this minute you would be panicking about Owen’s reaction. However, the second you saw his mouth drop and his eyes go wide and the look of total and utter shock cross his face, you burst out laughing.

You say down in your chair, covering your mouth with your hand to try to stifle the laughter. His expression turns to one of annoyance and he looks down at you.

“This is funny? Is it some sort of joke?” He asks harshly and his attitude sobers you up.

“No, it’s not a joke.” You say now, serenely. “Owen, Alan Grant is my dad.” You lok to your dad for him to say something, but he raises hsi eyebrows and puts his hands up defensively.

“Hey kiddo, you wanted to keep the secret.” He says and you look back towards Owen exasperatedly. “I’m just here because I want to know what your intentions are with my daughter.”

Your head whips back to him and you can feel the blush creeping across your cheeks. “Are you kidding me dad? Really?”

He tries to hide his smile but fails miserably and you speak up again. “This was such a bad idea.” You prop your elbows up on the table and put your head in your hands.

“So that’s why.” Owen says, a smirk slowly forming on his face. “The whole ‘I don’t wanna get special treatment’ thing.”

You raise your head and look at him confused. “What?”

“You wouldn’t go out with me because you don’t want to get special treatment, because you’ve probably had to deal with that all your life. Must get annoying after a while.”

Owen’s insight has you staring at him, shocked. He’s exactly right, of course, but you didn’t expect him to figure that out so quickly.

“Yup,” Your dad cuts in a response. “She hates it. Was mad that I made the call to tell them who she was when she applied.” Your dad smirks at you and you shake your head. That really did make you mad. As strongly as you wanted to make your own way, your dad wanted to make sure you were treated as well as possible, which is why he dropped his name in the first place.

“Well, Sir, my intentions are fairly honorable towards your daughter. If she will have me, that is.” He raises his eyebrow and looks at you and you let out a harsh laugh.

“You think asking me out again, this time in front of my dad is going to get you a yes?” He smirks and replies.

“I thought it was worth a try.” You dad laughs and puts a hand on your shoulder.

“He reminds me a little too much of myself.” He says and you smile. “And that’s not a good thing.”

The rest of the dinner goes pretty smoothly, dropping the whole complicated conversation and moving onto talk about the raptors and their training and their upbringing. While your dad directs most of the questions at Owen, you often speak up and input something about them that you have noticed or assumed. When you do this, you don’t miss the proud smile you get from Owen.

As the night goes on, you wonder exactly how long you will wait it out until you finally give in to Owen. After all, it’s useless to pretend it’s not going to happen eventually.

goodkidmaadplatano  asked:

for the name thing: Edwin, Edward, or some variation of Ed/Eddie

I know a guy named Eddie. He’s a really nice man, but his kids are totally bizarro. The oldest boy told me to pray for him because his grandpa was a “naughty boy”. His younger son asked me if he could rip out my eyebrow piercing.

How Eddie has raised such odd and cringe children, I will never understand. They are creep city.

Peter Pan and Popcorn


It seemed that Friday had become movie night. Henry would run home from school, dodging disgruntled New Yorkers who were trudging home after a hard day at work, and immediately shut all the curtains so the entire apartment was dark like a movie theater.

By the time the microwave dinged and Henry dumped the bag of popcorn into a bowl, Emma was on the couch in an old pair of shorts and a t-shirt, grumbling as she tried to fast forward through all the commercials. 

Stack’s of DVD’s that had been rented at the video store down the street sat stirred around the coffee table, untouched. Movie night always started out like this. They’d rent a plethora of different types of movies- adventure, thriller, romance, comedies… And every week those kind of movies were forgotten in favor of an old VHS tape that had been watched thousands of times over. 

“Mom,” Henry said, sitting down on the couch. Emma promptly stole the popcorn bowl from his hands. 

“When are we ever going to watch something that isn’t Peter Pan?”

The beginning scene started playing, soft music in the background.

“Probably when the tape breaks, kid,” Emma said, her eyes transfixed on the screen. Her eyes glazed over and she seemed to be transported to a whole different world as Peter Pan showed Wendy, John, and Michael all around Neverland with the help of the Lost Boys.

“I think we need to start watching other movies. Peter Pan is kind of starting to creep me out,” Henry said. 

“He does like his games,” Emma commented. 

“I’ve never really minded Captain Hook though.”

“He’s not too bad,” Emma agreed. “If waxed mustaches and perms are your kind of thing.”


The first time Emma and Henry show Killian Peter Pan they hardly watch the movie. They only watch the pirate’s face for any signs of horror when he finally comes on the screen for the first time. 

“Bloody hell!” Killian mutters, stuffing his mouth filled with popcorn almost bitterly. 

“Swan I do not and never will I look like that prattling idiot!”

Henry has to pause the movie for a full ten minutes because Emma’s laughter can’t be contained. 


Where, oh where, to begin? Maybe I will start from my conversation with Lisa and move backwards. I find it a bit frustrating that my employer is making statements about me and Tom on a personal level. Sure, we have both worked for Lisa for years, but her knowledge of who we are outside work is extremely limited. I couldn’t help but wonder where Lisa got the idea that Tom is a “charming devil” (or whatever she said). I have known Tom for four years now and for the first three of those years when we were just friends, we certainly never had any need or desire to impress one another or put on any kind of act. I have never felt it appropriate to use the word “charming” to describe him. Tom is goofy, smart, creative, and kind, with a seriously oddball sense of humor.
To bring me to my next point, the idea that somehow he has “charmed” me into some sort of stupid sheep is unfathomable. This whole “love is blind” thing is a concept that I have never understood nor subscribed to in my life. It goes against every fiber of who I am as a person. This is why it is so beyond frustrating for those words to ever be used in reference to me. What is and has always been important to me in all matters is facts and logic. I know that I have said this before, but it seems as though I can say things a thousand times and somehow never be heard or taken seriously. I was a theatre major in college, but I always excelled in math and sciences. Do you know why I enjoy those things so much? The answers are black and white (very few exceptions when you get into the advanced or theoretical subjects). I approach situations in my own life with this same mental approach. Given that knowledge, would it make one iota of sense that I would blindly follow anyone? Ever? No. Discretely leaving Sur was the best thing we could have done in that moment. I refuse to lose my job over petty dramatics or be a participant in this game. Does anyone really think that Tom should have stood there in the middle of the lounge with customers present and be a part of a disgusting screaming match with those girls? I would hope not. So, let’s get into the facts that provide me with all of this confidence on the subject, shall we?
Below is a list of things that were said and the facts that refute those things:
“We talked for 7 hours”- I would really love to know how talking to someone for that long, or at all, would be physically possible if Tom was on the phone with me multiple times for prolonged periods throughout the night in question. Not only that, but during said conversations Tom described to me these three girls who were fans of the show who seemed to be asking a lot of questions about it and creeping him out. Tom is a very nice and welcoming person so, when he is expressing discomfort at someone’s presence in the group, you know he isn’t kidding.
“He held my hand”- The only reason the three guys were in Miami was because they were doing paid club appearances. Therefore, they were advertised and overtly informed people where they would be at all times. People came to see them, meet them, and take photos. Again, please explain to me how this would have happened and it would be plausible that there would be no photos or recounts of this from anyone else. Also, wouldn’t Tom have to be as brain-dead as a piece of plywood to do that? She really should have considered these things before she started all of these lies. At least pepper your story with details that are believable.
“I found her on social media”- This all began when this story was sold to a tabloid for monetary compensation. Upon first hearing of it, I immediately saw multiple red flags and contradictions to what I know to be true based on many factors. Not only did she admit that she sold it and her reasons for doing so (Jax was holding her laptop until she and her friend paid him back for items they charged on his card and she was vewwy vewwy mad about it), but her story has warped at least a handful of times since its original print version.
“He’s still in love with Kristen”- LOL
“It fits the description”- Oh, let me guess, Tom’s penis is shaped like a penis? This actually might have been a good one if we weren’t fully aware that Kristen and this girl talked for months about this or if Tom had any kind distinct penile attribute.
Supplemental item #1- My brother went on this trip with them. It was actually really cool to see and hear him and Tom begin a friendship that has truly blossomed from there.
Supplemental item #2- The night this all happened at Sur, Tom and I were in the back parking lot chatting before we left. Around the corner comes an extremely irate Miami girl. Plain as day, she shouted “This isn’t how Kristen promised it would be!”
Can I please rest my case?
Despite all of this, people will say whatever they want to say. They always have and they always will. I have done what is in my power to shed light on these allegations, but I do not preside over the court of public opinion. As far as I know, a romantic relationship is between two people and not the entire cast of a show plus its audience. I will always get heated when I see people I know so well and care about being dragged through the mud. It upsets me when anyone speaks poorly of my friends. I don’t typically jump in the ring for myself, but I do for them.
I thank Scheana for speaking up about the whole thing. I hope she sees now that I am not only happy and in love, but that I don’t have any reason not to trust Tom. He has always made sure that I don’t have to play guessing games or wonder for a moment what the truth is. I have to give him a lot of credit. We all have a past. We all have previous relationships. We have all made mistakes in our lives. Tom has learned from his past mistakes (as have I), and never have I experienced a relationship that is so solid, open, and loving. I try every day to treat Tom with the same love and respect he has shown me. We have all heard that true love is rare and hard to find. We are so lucky to be able to experience that with each other. On that note, I have some serious cuddling to do.