things that bug me about teaching

Ok so I love the idea of really friendly and outgoing Finn just wanting to be friends with everyone (within reason of course. Every one of the pilots he knows by name and goes out of his way to say hello to them every morning)
And he’s still new to all this “normal” stuff and of course Poe in return is still finding out just what all Finn knows about things
And one day they’re chilling and Poe is like “have you ever kissed anyone Finny?” And Finn is like “idk what that even is” but he’s so excited to learn anything Poe will teach him and he bugs Poe about showing him.
Poe is like “well it’s kind of like a hug…” And Finn gets excited cause HE LOVES HUGS AND GIVING HUGS AND RECEIVING HUGS SO KISSES MUST BE GR10 POE YOU HAVE TO SHOW ME
and Poe like tried to show him on BB-8 but bb is like hell no you’re not putting your lips on me
And Finn is like"bro what’s the deal just give me one"
And so they kiss and BB makes high pitched excited noises

Bonus: Finn goes on to give all of his friends kisses whenever he sees them because Poe forgot to share that kisses aren’t EXACTLY the same as hugs woops

LIBRARY PEEPS LISTEN UP

So a lot of people lately have been telling me about either getting jobs in libraries or wanting to get a job in a library or, hell, going to libraries and god I am so happy and astounded and proud of you.

BUT.

There’s something I wanna explain to you that they don’t teach you in school.

Libraries. Have. Bed Bugs.

Yes.

You heard me right.

Those places of infinte knowledge and power and blah-dee-blah are hotels for the worst sort of live in vermin. And if you worked in one like me, you know how awful this entire thing is.

So here’s the info. Before you go and make your dreams come true.

  1. Those clothes your wearing? When you get back from that library? There is a huge fucking chance that you could have those fuckers all over you. They’re so tiny, you wouldn’t be able to see them. So here’s what you do  - dry those things. Put them on high in the dryer for fifteen minutes as soon as you step through the door. Heat kills.
  2. BOOKS ARE GREAT. But they are homes for vermin. Disgusting, invasive, human devouring, vermin. Especially when they’ve traded hands. You don’t know where that book’s been. Remember step one? Heat kills? Yeah, we’re gonna do that again. You grab yourself a fucking industrial sized hair dryer (or, fuck, a regular one) and do a DIVA JOB on that things pages.
  3. I cannot stress this enough. VACUUM VACUUM VACUUM . Suck them up and listen to their screams as they DIE. And if you already have bed bugs, vacuum your bed and mattress every single day.
  4. DON’T STOP LOVING LIBRARIES! They are wonderful things. And all wonderful things have a skeleton in their closet. In this case, their skeletons are fuck tons of evil, disgusting vermin that haunt your mattress.

Stay happy! Stay well read! STAY CLEAN!

M’out!

Boycott Mass Effect: Andromeda, here‘s why

This is Skyrim all over again, where so many people are going to eat up a horribly bugged game. This tells the game companies that they can give us a load of literal unfinished garbage so long as their is a little bit of something nice looking on top.

Meanwhile Mighty Number 9 got blasted for doing the same thing and the designer took full responsibility for allowing it to happen under his watch, despite not being directly related to why it had happened.

Also remember ME:A is made by EA, who’s CEO is the guy known for saying “Video Games are a Business.” While sure this is true, most game companies aren’t going to flat out say that to their fans, this is saying “So long as I make money I don’t care what you think about the game.” It is having no passion for the content you are making and only caring about how much money you will make off it.

Now I’m going to admit, I’ve never played a ME game, and likely wasn’t going to get Andromeda anyway, but I for one would not want to see this start being a trend, that specifically the big name American game companies start doing, while Indie Developers don’t get any leeway. Show the big name companies that WE CARE about the product being properly tested and working before we fork over the money. Make EA realize they better fix this issue SOON, you know like fans did regarding ME3′s ending. And once they have fixed the problems, THEN go buy it.