I had created a mysterious organization that the players were meant to spent several sessions following leads around the city. Our rogue, instead, successfully befriended a small group of them and lead our party to their apartment where an enemy with 4 max HP awaited them.
DM: Okay, so, your buddies aren’t home. The only person there is the cranky wizard who didn’t like you or your partying last night. You guys are out in the alley with a homeless person and his cat.
Fighter: Can I roll Animal Handling to pet his cat? -succeeds check-
DM: Sure, no problem.
Ranger: I want to pet the cat too! -crit fails-
DM: Alright well as you approach the cat, she runs away.
Rogue: I want to sneak up to the window to see what the mage is doing.
DM: He’s sitting on the couch staring at the wall since video games haven’t been invented yet.
Fighter: Okay cool, so can I barge in there while Case (the rogue) covers us?
Rogue: Wait! Wait! He might be really strong. Let me shoot him once.
DM: …You want to shoot him?
Rogue: Well, just like in the leg or something so that if he is really powerful we’ll have a good amount of damage on him.
DM: Okay, so you want to shoot him in the leg. That’ll probably not be lethal.
Rogue: Actually, I want to shoot him in the dick. -rolls a crit for a total of 25 damage out of his 4HP-
DM: Okay well you Robin Hood that shit straight down the shaft and out his asshole so…
Fighter: Uh, is he dead?
DM: He was dead on impact. Yes. Matilda (NPC Demolitionist) goes outside and sits beside the house, sobbing with sympathy pain. Baxter (her wife) goes to comfort her.
Rogue: I didn’t mean to kill him!
DM: Well, you did. You shot him in the dick for 625% of his HP so he’s very dead.
Rogue: I write down “oops” on a piece of paper and hand it to Jasper.
DM: WHAT?! Who’s Jasper? I-
Rogue: No, no, I meant Baxter!
DM: Nope, nope, you write down “oops” and hand it to Jasper, the homeless man. He runs from you as fast as he can with fear in his eyes.
Rogue: Okay, well, now I hand it to Baxter.