In which I discover myself more
I made a rather astounding realization about myself yesterday while I was driving home.
I was thinking about a character I was working on for a new RPG I’m in.
AND I realized that the characters I love RPing the most are either female versions of male characters or just male characters.
That got me really thinking.
Why are the characters I prefer, that I relate to on a deeply personal level, male?!
Part of it may be because male characters are well written, and more dynamic than most female characters.
But upon much introspection I realized that I may indeed be Genderfluid.
I am born female. I mostly identify as female, but not 100%. More like 70%.
Yes, I wear makeup. But that’s really only a recent thing.
It makes me feel like my face looks less tired, more alive!
The more sparkle I add the more alive I feel.
I wear women’s clothing, but once again it’s really only because that’s what fits me and makes me look ok.
I hate wearing dresses, and skirts.
Generally my preferred wardrobe is jeans and a fitted t-shirt!
Yes I get my nails done. Why? Because they look nice!
It’s taken me almost 35 years of living to figure myself out. And I’m still working on it.
But so far I know these things about myself:
I love my husband and daughter.
I want a girlfriend.
I prefer role playing male characters.
Funny thing is, when I told my hubby all of this he chuckled and said that he already knew all of that!
He knew all along that I was gender fluid! Lol!