Update! I just posted chapter 3 on AO3.

Thanks @hpfanonezillion for betaing this story! :)


“Is it true?” Peeta asks, his voice quiet, almost getting carried by the wind. He walks looking ahead, his steps loud and steady.

“Is what true?” she asks. Something moves inside her, uncomfortable.

The moon shines behind them as they head towards the Meadow, not full yet, but close enough that there’s plenty of light to see. Katniss isn’t sure if she’s the one guiding them, or if both had the same thought.

He still isn’t looking at her. “You know what,” he says quietly.

And truth is, she does. And it is. She lowers her head. “It’s true,” she admits.

He doesn’t answer immediately, turning his head to the forest on the other side of the fence, nonchalant. He already knew that was going to be her answer, but still needed to hear it from her anyway. “When is the big day?”

She’s thankful he doesn’t say congratulations or pretends to be happy for her. But he’s not looking at her and she can’t read him. Suddenly he’s become a stranger.

“We don’t know yet.”

8

endless list of favorite movies ☰ the hunger games series (2012-2015) dir. gary ross & dir. francis lawrence

What I need to survive is not Gale’s fire, kindled with rage and hatred. I have plenty of fire myself. What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again. 

5

Someday I’ll explain it to you, why they came, why they won’t ever go away. But I’ll tell you how I survive it. I make a list in my head, of all the good things I’ve seen someone do. Every little thing I can remember. It’s like a game. I do it over and over. Gets a little tedious after all these years, but… there are much worse games to play.

  • Normal Person: School is over and this summer I'll go out with my friends all the time.
  • Me: Go out? No way! I have to read all the books on my endless tbr.
  • what she says: i'm fine
  • what she means: finnick odair is viewed widely as a superficial character who was only self-obsessed and okay with being a killer, but really he survived the hunger games as the youngest ever winner, went through that much trauma and survived at 14 years old, grew up to fall in love with an emotionally damaged girl who had gone through what he had, yet she had turned out more externally damaged, grew close with a sweet old woman, was willing to protect her with his life and literally physically carried her on his back in the games, despite the risk to himself, stood with the rebellion against the Capitol even though he was their darling, publicly defied and spilled secrets about the president, married that same damaged girl he loved even in the middle of a war and had a child who he never got to meet, helped a psychologically damaged and unrecognizable Peeta and defended him, protected his friends and team against the lizard mutts, and actually begged for Katniss to throw a bomb down where he was, because he knew that it would save her and the rest of the team, even though he would die.
6

Good night,” I whisper to the bow in my hand and feel it go still. I raise my left arm and twist my neck down to rip off the pill on my sleeve. Instead my teeth sink into flesh. I yank my head back in confusion to find myself looking into Peeta’s eyes, only now they hold my gaze. Blood runs from the teeth marks on the hand he clamped over my nightlock. “Let me go!” I snarl at him, trying to wrest my arm from his grasp.

I can’t,” he says.