theyre not hoes

“Tooru, what are you doing?”

“It’s our first real date Iwa-chan! We have got to do this right!”

“I know all that, but do you really have to leave and come back? We’re both ready, we should just go now before we’re late.”

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honestly all y'all doing lists of wrestlers you’d sleep with amaze me like…y'all have such restraint bc mine would just be like;

most of them; because i am a h o e

Christmas Confessions

Christmas Calendar 2016 » December the 21st:
Epilogue: Stripper!Calum - Christmas Confessions 

Pairing: Stripper!Y/N/Stripper!Calum

Rating: NC-17

Request: Yes

Words: 5.500+

Previous Parts: 1 | 2 | 3

Summary: It’s Christmas at the strip club and that means sexy Santa girl costumes and lots of candy canes! But when Calum gets insanely jealous over Y/N giving it all on her podium he leaves the place urgent unknowing that she’s following him in his heels. 

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evalocity  asked:

I'M SHOOK MONSTA X IS SO GOOD WHY DID I WAIT BEFORE TRYING TO DISCOVER THEM OML

GOD BLESS YOU FOR ENTERING THE EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER THAT IS MONSTA X … WHAT SONG DID YOU LISTEN TO? WHO’S YOUR BIAS? …IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FEEL FREE TO ASK XD

I see so many comments on this amino about people saying they hate how popular lynx got, that theyre boring, and hoe Lynx is only popular because of the they/them pronous. While yes I’ve seen people excited to see the pronoun use, it feels like people who dislike it are the ones who talk about it the most.


Like, honestly Lynx is just adorable, that’s why they’ve gotten popular

How can you not fall in love with an omnic with bunny ears

anonymous asked:

okay why are Virgo Venus supposedly shy and lil virgins when all my ones I have met ARE HOES THAT STEAL UR BF

THEYRE LITERALLY ALL HOES WHO STEAL BOYFRIEND
BC
USUALLY THEY HAVE PLUTO SQUARE VENUS
WHICH IS A HOE ASF PLACEMENT
IN OTHER GENERATIONS THEYRE LIKE
🙌🏻Jesus got this 🐱 on 🔒🙏🏻
BUT IN OURS CAUSE OF THE SAG PLUTO ITS LIKE
Jesus is tryna claim but they’re all
“New 🐱 who dis?”

JUST
AHHHHHH

anonymous asked:

Riarkle and Lucaya camping headcanon

akjhfkjan this would be so funny

+ ok so like . farkle and riley would be completely clueless

+ like no fucking idea of wha t is going on

+ maya and lucas would have their tent up in like five minutes and farkle would still be trying to understand the directions as riley is sitting up against a tree, crying, because she stepped on a butterfly

+ and then lucas would try to offer help and farkle would be like super stubborn bc HE CAN DO IT he’s a GENIUS he surely can put together a fucking TENT

+ but . it turns out he can’t

+ so he begrudgingly joins riley against the tree and is just all huffy but she reminds him that he is very manly and talented and HOW EXCITING LOOK AT THAT BUNNY! WE’RE ONE WITH NATURE FARKLE!

+ and he suddenly remembers why he even went camping in the first place

+ bc he’s fucking in love with riley matthews

+ MEANWHILE lucas and maya have already set up both tents and are preparing lunch

+ and lucas is being a cocky little shit about how fast he can light a fire and maya is like …seems fake but ok

+ so his masculinity is Shook™ and challenges her to a campfire off and whoever lights it first gets to call the shots later

+ and as everyone knows, maya never steps down from a challenge especially if it’s one that could take lucas down a peg

+ so they begin working and within like two minutes Maya has a fire going and is screaming bc she even surprised herself

+ and then all of a sudden riley is running up to Maya and jumping on her BC SHE’S SO PROUD HER PEACHES

+ so lucas mumbles something irrelevant and sulks over to where farkle is and sits next to him so they can be whiny babies together

+ and then the girls come over and harrass them bc they boys are being so EXTRA 

+ and they’re just like “whatever you two are better off without us”

+ and the girls are like “u right”

+ so they walk back over to the tents and the fire where they start lunch and riley is playing music off of her solar powered bluetooth speaker that she will literally never use again

+ and then theyre dancing and laughing and the boys are having a very hard time acting like theyre helpless and whiny

+ bc look at their girls theyre so happy !!! we should be happy with them !!! such ethereal beings !!! how did we get so lucky

+ but of course they dont say that bc the masculinity is strong with this one

+ it isnt until the girls run back over to them and grab them to dance that they allow themselves to be happy and dance with them and eat their lunch of hot dogs and actually have a good time

+ and then night falls

+ and things get wild

+ maya is cold . always . but she hates admitting it

+ so lucas tries to offer her his jacket and she’s like IM FINE

+ and he’s like YOURE FREEZING

+ so they’re bickering and farkle are laughing at them as theyre all snuggled up together as they have like thirteen blankets

+ and then finally maya storms off to the tent

+ and lucas is like “she’s lucky i love her”

+ and then he follows her in there and theyre bickering for a little bit and then it’s silent and riley is like …did she

+ did she kill him

+ so she gets up to go check on them and farkle yanks her back down and is like “i don’t think you want to do that”

+ and she’s all confused bc she’s like LUCAS COULD BE DEAD

+ but then she realizes

+ and she is now disgusted

+ and goes and unzips their tent with one hand over her eyes just to yell at them about how WE WERE LITERALLY FIVE FEETS AWAY HAVE YOU NO DECENCY

+ but then the only response she gets is maya throwing a pillow at her bc “jesus christ riley we were ASLEEP lucas and i did all of the work all day we were SLEEPING”

+ and then she’s embarrassed

+ so she apologizes and zips it back up

+ but little does she know that they were doing exactly what she had thought but pretended to be asleep as soon as they heard farkle try to stop her

+ lol they wild

+ so then farkle and riley go over to their tent to go to sleep bUT NOT BEFORE LOOKING AT THE STARS AND MAKING OUT UNDER THE CONSTELLATIONS BC THEYRE SPACE HOES

+ it’s just . a magical time