they ruined the kiss though

Ruin part 2

Requested by @latteshawn PART 2 PART 2 and anonymous: part 2 to ruin?? it was amazing!! part 1

AN: Thank you both for requesting! It felt really good knowing at least two people enjoyed it enough for a second part. I’m going to put out there how hard I’ve tried today to do the Shawn Mendes Accent Challenge, but I’m so technologically challenged it wasn’t working. I’m still going to try and figure out how to post it though because it was a lot of fun. Also, thank you to @ihaveabadreputation for always being up for reading over my imagines. Allison is amazing !


Originally posted by your-local-killjoy

 Sunday had passed incredibly slowly. You kept to yourself the entire day, avoiding your family. Shawn hasn’t texted or called, which was understandable. You just weren’t sure if it was up to you to make the next move. Even if you did, you had no idea what it should entail. It had been less than twenty four hours and you were still very committed to your boyfriend. You hadn’t bothered telling anyone what happened, either. 

Your finger hovers over Shawn’s name in your contacts then moves to your boyfriends. You came to the one conclusion that sounded fair. The only way you’d reach out to Shawn would be to end things with your boyfriend. You didn’t doubt that it was incredibly rushed, but Shawn made you feel things you only heard of in books, or movies. 

The entire idea sounded insane in your head, but you needed to be honest with yourself. ‘Why were you dating your boyfriend?’ 'How long would you keep loving him so wholeheartedly, waiting for him to open up with his feelings?’ 'Why were you lying to your friends, but more than that, to yourself?' 

High school seemed to be built off drama between friends and relationships. Even though half the couples you came in contact with only talked through social media. Maybe you were waiting for someone to notice that you weren’t invested in your relationship the way you had once been. That didn’t mean you planned for the words to come from Shawn. 

He was the last person you expected to make you think it was ok to end something that wasn’t going anywhere. You had been no better. Even though you never thought of yourself as being in one of those “cliche high school couples” that’s exactly what you were. Chasing someone’s love who didn’t want to give it to you. Why were you making it so hard on yourself when it could be so much easier? 

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What absolutely ruins me about the Berena kiss isn’t necessarily the kiss itself (though I’ve replayed it 500 times plus!) What gets me is the little things in between it.

- The slight hitch of Serena’s breath as she hesitates between kisses.

- The way that Bernie pulls away from the first kiss, and her eyes immediately search Serena’s for confirmation. But Serena’s eyes have already found Bernie’s, and instead slip down to look at her lips.

- How Serena ducks back ever so slightly as she hesitates as though she might pull away, but the fierceness in which she surges forward to kiss Bernie again is monumental.

- BERNIE’S FINGERS IN SERENA’S HAIR

- Serena’s fingers clutching hold of Bernie’s arms, letting her go briefly between kisses before clasping back onto her.

- HOW DAZED AND FULL OF DESIRE SERENA IS IN THOSE SECONDS AFTER THEIR FIRST KISS

- And then obviously the actual kiss that is at first trembling and tentative, but then turns into a bruising, desperate display of utter emotion.

Tell me what’s the cure
For two people addicted to each other,
One wants to heal
And the other doesn’t.
You’re a sin and I’m the sinner
But why do I not feel guilty?
I broke your heart and made you cry
Why won’t you leave me?
We live in such a mess that we like to call love
But I never knew that love means ruining each other.
I enjoy every touch and kiss you give me
Even though I know I shouldn’t.
But to you, every kiss, every touch is a new breath of life.
We are neither lovers nor strangers
Just two lost souls that can’t feel the void inside
Once they get together.
One of us seeks recovery from this addiction
The other finds it as a source of happiness.