they never end up the way i want

anonymous asked:

Advice for coping with/dealing with hatred for your art and the feeling that it will never be good enough? I want to channel that into motivation to improve my art but I always end up getting mentally exhausted and frustrated because I don't like the way my style looks and I'll spend hours trying to work on it to no avail.

You gotta spend more than hours to adapt I’m afraid ;o; disliking your work is frustrating as hell, everyone’s been there, but it will change as you learn and practice more. Try to narrow down what it is you really don’t think is working, like if it’s the face structure or anatomy or whatever, and observe from life or art styles you like to see what they got right. Whenever I get into this funk I try to look at other artists I love and think ‘damn look at this amazing work, I’m gonna reach that level eventually if I keep trying hard’ and that usually gives me the push of motivation I need.

It’s really easy to feel as if it’ll never be good enough, but it will. It may take time, but it will. You gotta be patient but remind yourself that the more you work the more you’ll learn and change!

2

A tiny Sonya pic; I can never tell when enough detail is enough for tinier pics, so I feel like I always end up making them look cluttered.

Then, I drew Sonya as a Chinese Maid, for some reason (saw a design for the costume online and I wanted to try it out cuz I thought it was super cute). Turned out better than I expected (hands and legs are still hard ;~;).

I do think I’m getting better at this whole art thing. Still got a long way to go before I’ll be satisfied! Regardless, I think we can all agree:
We Need More Sonya Art!

2

Saturn

You taught me the courage of stars before you left.
How light carries on endlessly, even after death.
With shortness of breath, you explained the infinite.
How rare and beautiful it is to even exist.

- “Saturn” by Sleeping At Last

“He promised!”, the younger man cried. A heartwrecking, choked sound. “He promised he’d come back!”

Tears seeped through the fabric of Ryou’s shirt and slender fingers dug into his back with a force he’d never thought Keith possessed. There was nothing he could do. Nothing he could say. No support he could’ve offered. He could only wrap his own arms around the smaller figure and hold him.

It had been two months. Two months since Keith fled the constricting walls of the Galaxy Garrison and vanished into the cold desert night. Two months and twenty-two days since Iverson’s spokesman announced the Kerberos mission was a failure. Two months and twenty-nine days since the comms of his brother’s ship went dead.

Noone knew where Keith went that night, except for Ryou. There was only one place in the world Keith would seek out for shelter. It was the only place Takashi had never shared with his twin. Because it was their place. Their shelter. Keith and Shiro. Only them. And Ryou had respected that, content with the fact that his brother had finally found love, even if Takashi himself hadn’t known that back then.

Now that Takashi was gone, he couldn’t help but venture out into the desert more and more often. He felt adrift and numb, left in a state of levitation before reality would finally come crashing in. Always looking for that special place that held so many memories of his brother. The shack.

Packed with supplies - food, water, wool blankets, lamp oil, a notable stock of lighters and all the little things Keith may or may not need by now - Ryou had steered his black hoverbike away from the Garrison this morning and straight into the unforgiving heat of the desert. Always looking for that one spot on the map that still held some of his brother’s very soul. That one damned spot that Ryou knew he should never seek out. For it held the only tangible evidence of his brother’s death. His absence at Keith’s side. And he knew this would break him.

When he finally found the shack, he knew Keith was there before he even saw him in person. The red hoverbike, parked right infront of the small porch, gave him away. Its black twin’s engine purred and finally went silent under Ryou. Before Kerberos, before everything went down the drain, the red bike had belonged to Takashi. A gift, Ryou had made for him. He still remembered the face Taka made when he’d seen his birthday present. Now that day seemed eons away… Surreal and alien like memories of a life that belonged to somebody else.

Keith opened the front door before Ryou could even make it to the porch. And for one moment it seemed like the world had come to a halt, remembering that there was something missing, before it started turning again with cold, regardless indifference. Feigning ignorance towards two now incomplete and broken beings. The universe had greater things to take care of.

Seeing Ryou - the spitting image of his lost brother - must’ve been the last straw. Keith hadn’t cried. Not when Ryou had called him after the ship went silent, not when the announcement came that all crew members were believed to be dead. Not even when he had left the base. He had punched people. He had seethed with rage and he had broken things, but never cried. Now however…

“He promised!”, the younger man cried. A heartwrecking, choked sound. “He promised he’d come back!”

Now, after three months, shock and numbness, disbelief and repression finally faded… Keith cried.

And it broke Ryou…

___

So…. uh… this… this got out of hand? All I wanted was to express my headcanon that Ryou and Keith knew eachother from their time at the Garrison and that Ryou visited Keith after he got expelled. And that they both mourn Shiro together. But somehow I ended up writing way more than I had planned. xD Oh well…

The new trailer for s3 kinda left me adrift because WHAT THE FUCK. Why they keep doing this to me with every new season?! Where’s Shiro? Why’s he not in the trailer?! Why can’t we just… have him back and be save for once? Not knowing if my poor baby survives every new damn season has me stressing like fuck! So I felt like drawing Keith coping with losing Shiro. And then I ended up drawing this and feeling bad for poor Keith! Now I feel like I want to cry my eyes out…

I know you’re not sorry. And I know you’re not miserable like I wanted. But I also know that the way you looked at me that time I woke you up in the middle of the night to make you explain time travel was genuine love. And you’ll never feel that again. So maybe in the end, I’m the one that should be sorry.

can we just appreciate the fact that jamilla holds absolutely no grudge against sana over what happened. when sana said, “i was thinking about messaging you”, jamilla doesn’t say “why would you do that?” or “what for?”

she just says, “why didn’t you? what happened?”

like, i think that speaks volumes about jamilla’s character. her first thought is that of concern for sana. she’s essentially saying, why didn’t you feel like you could message me?

despite the fact that sana royally fucked up and invaded jamilla’s privacy in a way that caused jamilla to feel humiliated, jamilla is still there. she still very much wants to be a part of sana’s life, and wants to help in any way that she can. and at the end of that clip, she could tell something wasn’t right with sana. jamilla hasn’t spoken to sana in a year, and yet, after a five minute conversation, she can tell that something is troubling her.

honestly, get you a friend like jamilla.

I believe Spencer’s twin is coming.

In this post I want to give a list of reasons why Twincer is my prime suspect as AD. I know a lot of these ‘clues’ come from interviews, but they’re still really convincing for me at least. I’ve definitely missed some of the clues from within the show because they’re not as easy to spot - we need to know for sure if Twincer is happening, then we can dig further. (The fun won’t instantly stop once the finale airs.) But for now, enjoy these, and at the end, I give my theory as to the motive.

Please note: none of this is overly new. This is just the summation of everything we’ve been talking about on my blog for the past couple months. I wanted to put all the ideas into one post, rather than 31529 mini posts scattered here and there. I will be updating this as we find more. 

  1. The famous airport scene from 715.
    We all already think it’s weird that "Spencer" asked Ezra to not tell anyone he saw her there with Wren. What’s weirder, is the fact that Wren and “Spencer” were arguing. Amongst muffle, I heard Spencer say "stop calling me that" (let me know if you heard differently). Did Wren have a slip-of-the-tongue moment and call her Spencer rather than the twin’s real name?
  2. Dr. Cochran’s story is very telling.
    We all already know the ambiguous implication that Mary had more than two babies, because Dr. Cochran said he dealt with “two of Mary’s babies”. What’s more interesting is the second baby he dealt with. The first baby (Charlotte) he gave to Jessica. He said that the second baby that he delivered was placed in family county services. This could not have been Spencer, since Spencer was delivered to Veronica within 5 minutes of birth. So, who was that second baby that was placed in family services? I believe it was Spencer’s twin. Why? Dr Cochran referred to that second baby as “underweight but tenacious” - lo and behold, the next episode, Toby calls Spencer tenacious. This was the writers foreshadowing the similarities between this second baby, and Spencer. Twins. 
  3. We all know Hanna’s ‘dream’ in 701.
    It makes no sense that Hanna was able to dream ‘Spencer’ saying the name A.D. since Hanna was kidnapped before these initials were even revealed. Perhaps Hanna was visited by Twincer; the one holding her captive.
  4. A.D. needs to stand for something. 
    Spencer’s twin could literally have the initials A.D., since we know she would be Mary Drake’s child. Her first name would start with A and the D would stand for Drake. 
  5. Brendan and Ian both confessed to being confused by the identity of A.D.
    They needed the backstory to understand it. Is that because they had no idea who has the name “Alex Drake” (for example) ?
  6. Tyler said before 7B aired that “you’ve never met AD. You kind of have. You’ll know what I mean”.
    This can be interpreted in two ways: you’ve never met Twincer but since you know Spencer, you kind of know who AD is. Or. You’ve seen Twincer over the years, but thought it was Spencer. Either way, Tyler’s comment screams twin-theory to me. This could apply to any twin theory, but in this context, I’m using it for Spencer.
  7. Ian said (0:57) that “fans will be satisfied to a point. Right when it seems it’s gonna be really great, it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”….
    That cheeky smile on Ian’s face when he said “it seems it’s gonna be really great”… what could be greater than a liar being AD? Ian could be referring to the fact that they initially show us Troian under the hoodie, making us think Spencer is AD. Then, after commercial break, they will reveal it’s just her twin, hence the “it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”. We will be satisfied to a point, he said. It’ll start off amazing by thinking it’s Spencer, oh wait, it’s another twin.
  8. Ashley said (0:14) that she didn’t even know the A.D. reveal is possible.
    Because she did not expect a second pair of twins to come along?
  9. “It’s like there are two of you living in this house. You, and you’re evil twin, and we’re not sure who’s coming down to breakfast". 
    said Veronica to Spencer in 423. Foreshadowing at it’s finest.
  10. Spencer doesn’t remember this flashback.
    Was it her twin? And oh how coincidental, that the writers tell us a time Spencer doesn’t remember, in the same scene Veronica makes the above comment about Spencer’s “evil twin”.
  11. “Where are they?”
    said Mary as she entered the Hastings house (flashback from 717). Who is they? The twins? She proceeded to say that Spencer is the only good thing she’s ever made. Maybe Mary knows Spencer’s twin is evil, and is neglecting her. 
  12. “You look very much like your sister. Almost like twins”.
    said Mary to Spencer in 701. The writers wanted us to think that Mary was talking about Spencer and Melissa, since Mary was holding a picture of the half-sisters. But, were the writers, and therefore Mary, hinting towards Twincer? Is Mary being blackmailed/forced (by Peter?) to keep quiet on Twincer, and she had a slip-of-the-tongue moment here?
  13. Marlene is very aware of the Twincer theories.
    Back in 2014 she said that Troian sent her an online fan theory regarding Spencer having a twin who is A. Marlene was blown away by it and she thought it was a very well thought out plan with detailed evidence across the series. Watch from 1:35. Whilst you may be saying “there’s NO WAY Marlene spoilt her own show’s ending in an interview!!” - I feel like she had no idea the show would go on for 7 seasons, and once they got renewed, she panicked. “Shit, we need a new Uber A. Let’s go with that brilliant fan theory Troian sent me”. She probably regrets making this interview now. You can tell her passion for Twincer in this interview. She talks so damn highly of it.
  14. Marlene has said that the person who plays A.D. had known for a while.
    We know that Marlene told Troian the entire ending of the show years in advance. “Just like I had story time with Marlene, you all now get story time with Pretty Little Liars” said Troian.
  15. The girl in the coffin in the opening has the exact same black puffy shirt as Spencer.
  16. Why does it seem that A.D. is always going after the Hastings?
    Why shoot Spencer, out of all the liars? Why demand Aria to plant the audio device in the Hastings? Why not ruin the Marin household? The jealous twin wants her ungrateful sister dead, hence the shooting, and the jealous daughter is angry she never got adopted. Too much of the story is Hastings-oriented. 
  17. “They’re all some pretty. Good. Theories.”
    Was Janel’s response to being asked about the Spencer-twin theories. (22:20)
  18. And, I’ll just leave this here. Good one @prettylittlesessions​ !
  19. “Spencer’s” weird comments in 718.
    In 718 “Spencer” says to Toby “you know what its like to be the outsider. Removed from friends and family”. What made her say this? Nothing was said or done in 718 to prompt our Spencer to say this. 
  20. Keegan said there are no more Spoby kisses in 7B.
    “I can honestly say that there is not another Spoby kiss.” Yet - there was one in 718. Either Keegan lied, or that was Spencer’s twin. (10:15)
  21. “It’s somebody you have seen.”
    says Marlene in regards to who AD is. Was she talking about the Spoby kiss in 710, which Twincer referred to in 718 when she kissed Toby again? Marlene was very careful to avoid saying “it’s someone you KNOW”. We don't “know” Twincer. But, we have seen her.
  22. “That’s not the Spencer I know”
    said Toby in 718. Writers are foreshadowing.

Setting all this aside, I want to add my theory on the backstory and motive:

  • Twincer, who’s name is A_____ Drake, was born in Radley, as Dr. Cochran told us in 7A. 
  • Twincer was raised in Radley - not because she needed to be at a psychological hospital, but as a form of daycare, because Mary was deemed an unfit mother, and also she kept Twincer a secret from Peter… he already hated her (to the point of planning her murder, later on) enough for having one baby together, imagine Peter’s reaction to having twins.
  • There, Twincer met and bonded with her sister Charlotte. Charlotte became Twincer’s only friend. (Twincer might even be Bethany, since we already know of this bond between Bethany and Charlotte, and how Bethany was drawing Charles being taken away by a monster. But for this theory, let’s just forget Bethany for a second.)
  • When Mona came to Radley and started telling Charlotte about everything she did to her sister, Charlotte and Twincer wanted to play. They wanted a turn at harassing Spencer and her friends.
  • For Charlotte, as we know, it was the feeling of finally succeeding at something in life that made the game her drug. For Twincer, it was something far darker.
  • Harassing Aria, Hanna, Emily and Alison is all about driving a wedge between the girls. Twincer wants to break up the girls. Turn them against each other. Hopefully by throwing fire at the girls, they will break up, ultimately, to ruin Spencer’s life. Again, jealousy. Twincer’s plan is backfiring because it’s exactly A’s threats that makes Spencer say “we need each other more than ever” and “always stick together”. The writers keep making the point of SPENCER being the one to make the comments about “always” sticking together. Twincer cannot break Spencer and her bitches. This is fueling Twincer’s anger. Nothing is working.
  • That’s why AD/Twincer recently shot Spencer. “If I can’t break the girls up to ruin Spencer’s life, why not just become Spencer?” Twincer shot Spencer in an attempt to assume her identity and squeeze her way into the loving friendship group that she could never crack. “These girls are so loyal to each other… they don’t even break up after even my threats. Damn, I want to be a part of this. It’s my turn to live a happy life. You had your turn Spencer.”
  • Note: I do not believe that AD has been operating since season 1. Mona’s time as A is completely independent from Charlotte and Twincer’s story. Mona started the game, and now someone is ending it, and she wants to know who. Charlotte and Twincer are their own duo; their own A-team, which stemmed as a result of Mona coming to Radley. Charlotte revealed herself - next up in the A team is Twincer, who is carrying on the game she once played with her sister. 

anonymous asked:

I'm 14 going on 15 and I hate how so many people who take a character that was just my age, and make creepy art and fic about him. I'm about to turn his current age and have been propositioned since I was 11 and was always told that adults who try things like that are perverts. So why is it when a bunch of 20 somethings pushing a teen who is around my age into a sexual relationship with an adult and do explicit crap, it's not perverted and gross? What about the teens who are feeling sexualized?

First off, thanks for writing me and being polite in your message. 

The first thing I want to address is this: you should never be made to feel sexualized. Unless it’s with someone you want to be sexual with, like a crush of yours. Even with someone you consider a crush, if you don’t want to feel that way and don’t want to do anything that can be considered sexual (be it even a kiss), you should never feel forced. This is not just now because you’re a teen, this is something that all of us go through and need to keep in mind even in our 20s, 30s and so on.

I’m so sorry that you feel that way in real life because some adults are absolutely disgusting. They are. Adults that prey on children are absolutely disgusting and horrifying and you should call them out, tell your parents or your teachers or the police. I’m not kidding here. I know it’s hard and you might feel like you’re going to be made fun of, or that they won’t believe you, or that they will side with the adult, or that will belittle you and tell you it’s not a big deal. If you tell someone you trust, they won’t do all those things. Go with your guts. Tell, even if someone only threw nasty words at you or catcalled you (and I really hope you never went through anything heavier than that). In those cases there won’t be much that you can do, but telling someone will help.

What I can tell from your message, is that you (subconsciously or not) equate sex with generally being nasty and perverted. This will probably be unnecessary, but I’ll say it anyway: sex is not inherently gross or disgusting or creepy. If you feel that it is, then it means you’re not ready to enter a sexual relationship, and that’s perfectly fine and normal. I won’t tell you that that’s only because of your age, because some people never (or very rarely) show any interest in sex (it’s called asexuality and it falls under the LGBT+ spectrum). Whether you do end up growing to want sex or not doesn’t matter here. 

What matters is that now you clearly don’t want to see sex and anything to do with it in your fandom experience and that’s fine. Tumblr offers you ways to make your experience better and show you only the content you want to see. Block any nsfw tag. Don’t follow blogs whose description clearly states that they post nsfw (like mine). Tumblr is a big and scary place if you just take everything it throws at you (be it ship hate, nsfw stuff, etc). The thing with it is that it can’t cater to everyone’s tastes, so you have to be active about blocking the stuff that YOU don’t want to see. Other 14-going-on-15 year olds might be okay seeing nsfw fanart and posts and that will be their Tumblr experience, but you should definitely take measures to protect yourself from what you don’t want to see. 

Now, the thing about Otayuri is that no matter how you twist it, it’s not illegal to ship it, even in a sexual way. You should definitely read this post about it, because the thing is, as much as we can project our feelings and real-world stuff into anime characters, they’re not real. 

I assure you that if Yuri on Ice was a flesh and bone show things would be different. I don’t really watch any current TV shows with teens in them so I can’t speak for what other fandoms do with their ship, whether they’re sexualized or not. I can only speak for this silly and amazing anime that’s been consuming my life for the past seven months or so.

Anime and cartoon characters are a safe way to explore things about real life. Whether it be sex or depression or anxiety or simply falling in love, we can all identify with an anime character and see our flaws, our fears and our history in them.

The thing you have to remember is that we (I’m speaking for the slightly older part of the fandom since I’m in my twenties) have been Yuri’s age. We’ve very likely had crushes on boys or girls that were a bit younger, our age or slightly older (like Otabek is). So I think for most of us, shipping Otayuri is a way to remember what it feels like to be a teen and be in love/have a huge crush. We will never be that age again, and maybe there’s things we regret not doing, crushes we wish we had confessed. By shipping Otayuri in an active way (meaning: drawing fanart or writing fanfiction) we can explore things we experienced as teens (or wish we had) and pour a little bit of ourselves in Yuri’s (or Otabek’s) character. 

Those things might involve anything from simple fluff or rough sex, because, accept it or not, some people at 15 or 16 were (are) having sex of all kinds. Sweet, loving, rough, vanilla, kinky, you-name-it sex. So not to explore that aspect in a healthy way (through fics or fanart) would be lying about what reality is, it would be denying that we ever thought about or had sex at that age.

Much like with blocking tumblr content, you can choose what kinds of fanfiction you read. Only read General and Teen and Up tagged things, read about fluff and about falling in love in a sweet innocent way. Read anything tagged “Ace!Yuri” (it means asexual, the thing I was telling you about before). 

But please understand this: when we sexualize Yuri, we’re mostly sexualizing our (often past) selves. Not other teens, not other real-life people. Yuri doesn’t exist in real life, and many of us see bits and pieces of ourselves in him. When we write about him we really write about ourselves, be it because we want to see how we (maybe a little sassier and bitchier version of us) would have confessed a crush to our best friend, or would have handled the aftermath of having just shoved our gloved fingers in said best friend’s mouth in front of thousands of people. Fanfiction is a study about versions of ourselves that never existed, but might as well have.

Another thing I need to make clear: Otabek is not an adult. I assure you that the morning of your 18th birthday you won’t feel like an adult. You’ll feel like the you from yesterday and it will be anticlimactic af, you’ll be like “That’s it?” and yeah, it will be it. Just because the law in some country or state says that 18 is the age of consent (which is set to 16 or 14 years old in many other countries) it doesn’t mean that you’re automatically an adult at that age. You can be 18 and have had sex since you were 14. You can be 18 and completely uninterested in sex. You can be 18 and have a 15 year old mental age, or you can be 16 and be mentally more mature than some 20 year olds.

What canon has shown us, is that Yuri and Otabek are much closer to each other’s mental age than the 2 years + a few months difference they share. I encourage you to find posts about why there’s no power imbalance between Yuri and Otabek, because they compete in the same sport and they have had similar experiences in life.

In conclusion, if you feel irked about nsfw fanart and fanfics and discussions when it comes to this particular ship, please don’t read it/watch it. But what I can assure you is that none of us are trying to sexualize you or your peers. When we sexualize pixels on a screen we don’t see those pixels as a flesh and bone version of a human, we only see an idealized character whose age we are or have been and whose personality and experiences we want to safely explore.

Also really important: when we write/draw NSFW, we don’t write/draw it for teens to read. I repeat: WE DON’T CREATE NSFW CONTENT FOR TEENS. We’re not your parents or guardians, we write NSFW for whoever feels like they can handle seeing nsfw content. If you’re a teen that goes on the nsfw tag and then complains about it (I’m not saying that’s what you did here, I’m speaking generally), it’s only your fault for going in a tag that you weren’t comfortable to begin with.

TL;DR: 

  • Speak up if you feel sexualized IRL in a way you don’t like;
  • Learn how to use tumblr safely, block tags, understand that tumblr doesn’t do those things for you. Make your fandom experience exactly the one you want to see;
  • Don’t trust adults who tell you this ship is somehow illegal: it’s not;
  • Understand what’s behind fiction and fanfiction as a way we have to explore real life things (often too personal to write about as ourselves, so we project those things in characters we like);
  • Understand that adulthood is not something that happens from one day to another;
  • Learn to discern what content is meant to be consumed by a teen and what content isn’t;
  • Be safe.
How to Create a Language Learning Schedule (+ Printable)

I recently set up a new language learning schedule for myself and I thought some of you might find my approach useful, so I decided to create a short guide and a printable (you can download it as a pdf here). Lots of people struggle with finding a way to study several languages at once (I do, too, as I’m currently learning 5 languages) and I think having a good plan is essential!

As you can see, it’s quite simple. Once you have downloaded the printable, you can create a perfect schedule for yourself in a few easy steps:

1. Define your goals

First of all, you should know why you need this schedule and for how long you want to stick with it. Do you want to plan your studies for next week, the next month or the entire term or (school) year? What exactly do you want to learn until the end of that time period? How many words, how many grammar topics, how many levels in your favorite language learning app? You need to answer these questions in order to be able to estimate how much time you should / can / want to spend on your target languages every day.

2. List your languages and resources

Secondly, you should make a list in which you mention the resources, methods and tools you want to use for each language. It should look something like this (the more detailed, the better):

3. Divide your resources into categories

I put six categories on the printable. Use a color code to show which resource belongs in which category:

4. Almost there…

There are a few things you should consider before creating the actual schedule:

  • How much work and time do you need to put in to reach your goals?
  • How much time do you actually have in a normal week? When do you want to study?
  • Are all of your target languages equally important? How often do you want to study language 1,2,3,…?
  • Do you have any classes that you have to prepare for / do homework for? If yes, you can include that in your schedule!
  • Do you want to avoid studying two similar languages in one day?
  • Do you want to focus on a special skill?

5. Set up your schedule!

Goals, resources, time management - you’re ready to make a detailed plan! Here is a random example:

In case you were wondering “why do the whole coloring thing and list your resources and everything” - I think this is a way to avoid procrastination. Let’s say it’s Friday, so you should be learning French vocab (orange) and practise listening (green) in Spanish. Now, if you never made a list with all your resources, you might end up wasting your time on tumblr or google searching for “Spanish listening practice” and reading arbitrary posts or watching videos you already know without really doing anything because you just don’t know what to do. If you consider your list, you will know that for Spanish, you will either have to watch a movie or listen to some music, and for French, you will have to do either Memrise or Anki. As I said before, this gets easier if your list is more detailed. Actual tasks like “watch a movie on website x about y with subtitles in language z” will force you to work with what you’ve got and use the methods and resources you already know. I read so many posts like “I keep downloading textbooks for that language but I never use any of them, I just keep downloading more” and this won’t happen to you if you use the list!

I guess that’s pretty much it… I hope you like the printable, enjoy your studies!

anonymous asked:

In ur opinion what's the camren timeline look like ? Like when'd they date or take a break whoa date and break rhyme

I’m giving you the big lines… jk, it’s basically a whole fanfic 😂

2012 : Camila and Lauren meet on x-factor - instant attraction between them but neither of them wants to admit anything - it’s just a crush at this point - they become best friends through the course of the show - Lauren is also dating Keaton at the time 

2013 : Fifth Harmony is reunited and starts touring, the friendship is still there and strong. Camren is a playful ship, they interact on twitter and don’t hesitate to show affection. It’s Camren yo!  

Camila and Lauren spend more and more time together, feelings grow and it shows on camera - I believe Camila was more accepting of those feelings while Lauren had a little more trouble with them, probably already questioning her sexuality (at this point neither of them has admitted to anything)

While all of this is happening, the Camren ship as a romantic pairing takes off and as the fandom gets bigger so does the ship until it eventually reaches the girls. Lauren gets scared because she probably feels like her sexuality is written on her forehead and she’s not ready for that, plus she’s probably scared of losing Camila’s friendship and ruining their public image. That was the time when Lauren started lashing out at the fandom, calling us delusional and stating clearly that she was not bisexual. Camila, witnessing how hard Lauren is against any romantic association with her, is very hurt ( I think at this point she already had very strong feelings for Lauren) and starts distancing herself from her (that’s around June/July). Maybe Lauren thought Camila wanted to distance herself because it’s Camila who didn’t want to be associated romantically with her, which pissed Lauren off even more because she thought “Camren” was the reason she was losing her best friend. 

They stay distant until the end of the year - Lauren starts dating Luis, maybe a way to get Camila off her mind ( there are theories out there about Lauren and Luis’s relationship being p.r to shut down Camren, I guess it’s always a possibility). Anyhoo, during that time Camila’s feelings only grow stronger, probably pushed also by jealousy and I think eventually she confessed her feelings to Lauren, which Lauren couldn’t reciprocate since she was in a relationship.

2014 : little time has passed since Camila confessed her feelings and Lauren probably can’t get her out of her mind - I think that’s the reason why she eventually broke up with Luis. Once that was done, Lauren returned Camila’s feelings and there you have it : Camren finally together!

They probably shared their first kiss, which was also Camila’s first kiss, at that time - since Camila says her first kiss was at 16 (not sure since it changes every two interviews 😂) then the kiss must have happened either in January or February.

By March/April they’re full on together, they go on “dates” - the most famous one is the 1975 concert.

They both realize they’re very serious about this relationship and slowly tell their families about it (Sinu probably knew since day one 😂) - eventually the management finds out. Of course, tiny problemo, you can’t possibly have two members of a still very new girl group publicly in a lesbian relationship, no sir. To add to the situation, the Camren fandom is getting bigger, starts its own detective agency. 

I think the girls fought hard to be able to actually stay together, even if it had to be behind closed doors. They probably had to negotiate a lot, and part of that negotiation was for one of them to have a good p.r boyfriend, and unlucky us, they’re about to go on tour with Austin Mahone aka Dorito Boy.

The “relationship” between Dorito and Camila is sold to the medias - they’re just asked to appear together outside a few times, hold hands and that’s that - but it was probably already too much for jelly Lern who decided to shut this down real quick, which is why it only lasted like 3 weeks - the break up is staged and sold to the medias as well.

Since a p.r boyfriend for Camila is not an option anymore, maybe a p.r boyfriend for Lauren will work better - oh and look who’s coming with them on tour soon, the Vamps! The p.r relationship is put in place with asshole Brad - my own personal theory is that maybe he didn’t know exactly what the p.r was for and he started actually wanting to date Lauren for real but she shut him down, probably revealing her relationship with Camila, hence the song “I found a girl” - they had to stop the p.r there, and because asshole Brad got his little asshole pride hurt he then went on to basically say Lauren was a slut in an interview with his little dicks asshole bandmates. 

Anyway, moving on. While all of this p.r is happening, Camila and Lauren try to navigate their own relationship while having to stay hidden and pretending in front of the world. Not an easy thing to do while at the same time having to deal with the pressure of touring and the fandom who’s always watching. 

Eventually I think Camila wanted to end all of it and come out. Probably by letting themselves “caught” making out or something, since the label/management would never let them properly come out. Slight problem, Lauren doesn’t want to, she’s not ready and there’s too much at stakes. We all know Camila is a dreamer, an optimist, and she tries to convince her but nothing does it. 

2015 : They eventually break up over it beginning 2015, knowing it might be the only way to salvage their friendship, for the good of 5H. They were both probably incredibly hurt by that break up.

(We enter The Hurting 😉 )

Basically that whole year was about them trying to get over each other while remaining friends for the sake of the group. That’s why we still get lingering looks, smiles and hidden touches… because who on earth could get over someone they still love if they have to see them everyday? 

A whole lot of shit also happens when Camila does her first solo collab with Shawn - she receives hate from “fans” like she’s never received before. The girls aren’t allowed to support her publicly because the perspective of a feud is more appealing to the medias so management plays that card.

Basically a really dark time for Camila, where she ends up writing “I Have Questions” in an hotel bathroom before she stops writing altogether. I think it’s a period where Camila’s anxiety really shot up and became a real problem for her, which is also probably why she distanced herself from the girls, to not bother them with her problems, and also obviously to stay away from Lauren.

I think eventually the girls went through to Camila and did everything to support her.

(We enter The Healing)

Somehow Camren found a way to really rebuild their friendship, which was always laced with quite a bit of flirting.

2016 : Lauren tries to get her girl back. And it takes a while 😂. I think they started an on/off casual kinda thing because Camila wasn’t ready to go down that road again probably because she was scared of getting hurt and also because she knows they will be in the same situation they were before, having to hide. But what can you say? The heart wants what the heart wants, and I think eventually they did officially get back together somewhere in the middle of 2016. 

(We enter the Loving *behind closed doors*)

If now Lauren feels more comfortable with her sexuality and the prospect of coming out - the problem now resides in Camila’s upcoming solo career - they already know 7/27 will be Camila’s last album with 5H. Coming out at this point in the game would be a public suicide. There’s no way in hell it’s happening. 

So instead Camila makes the deal of playing the “straight” girl image as much as the label wants if it means her and Lauren can be together behind doors.

A few months roll out, Camila’s departure is coming soon and the label needs to get ready for the “after Camila” - and the person who comes after Camila is Lauren. Now, how to make Lauren become even more popular? What could make medias talk about her? A little weed in her bag? Yes, but it’s not enough, she needs to make an impact. What could be more impactful than a well prepared coming out? Oh I know! You pair it up with a letter against the biggest enemy of the country at the moment, Donald Trump. 

But you can’t just risk that out of nowhere, you need to test the waters first, see how the fandom would react to Lauren’s coming out  - enters Lucy.

Now, Lucy has been Lauren’s best friend for years, she obviously knows about Camren and I believe she was also friends with Camila. The fandom knows Lucy, we’ve seen her with Lauren on multiple pictures, Lauren calls her her “sister”. Choosing Lucy to be Lauren’s love interest is a very smart move because there’s tons of “proofs” to back it up and for the fans to create a timeline of. Obviously the Laucy timeline will also have the benefit of discrediting the Camren timeline since Lauren couldn’t have possibly been with both girls at the same time. 

So, to test the waters, a photo of Lauren and Lucy kissing at a party is purposely leaked - the fact that the picture was taken at party is important because if the fandom and the medias don’t react the way the management expects them to, you can always say the kiss was just a kiss between to best friends who had a bit too much to drink at a party. Turns out the fandom reacts exactly like predicted, they embrace Lauren for who she is, they defend her against the people who “outed” her, she’s the new hero. That’s why only a few weeks later they give the green light for her to fully come out through a politically incline letter.

You might be wondering why would Camila, Lauren and Lucy accept such a plan? Well in Camila’s case it shuts down the Camren rumors which helps her keep her straight image up, plus it gives the woman she loves the opportunity to finally be herself. Lauren gets to finally come out and be proud of herself while at the same time protecting her girlfriend’s upcoming solo career. And finally Lucy gets to be known by the fandom and the LGBT community, putting her name out there before she releases her first album. 

So here we are, end of 2016 - Lauren is out and in a supposed relationship with her best friend, Camila is still playing the straight girl wanting a spanish boyfriend, while Camren is still together and in love behind the scenes. 

And now, it’s time to say goodbye. It’s all planned out, a feud is going to happen, Camila’s exit will be a dramatic one. Dinah leaves us little hints a few days prior, Normani cries before their last performance as a five piece and then it starts. 4 statement letters is all that everybody needs to believe everything went wrong, 4 letters is all that everybody needs to believe that a 4 year friendship ended in a day. 

2017 : radio silence for a weeks - Camila gives an interview in which she says none of the girls are talking to her, they keep the feud game going. 

Now that Camila is gone, there’s no real use for Laucy anymore and even if Lauren is identifying as bisexual, the label would rather have her being in a p.r relationship with a man - they use a photoshoot and an interview to end it simply and boost Lauren’s image in the LGBT community - which they will also do by having Lauren collab with Halsey.

Her and Camila are still together, but obviously it’s getting even more complicated now that they can’t absolutely be seen together. 

The label wants a p.r boyfriend for Lauren and Ty Dolla Sign is in need of some headlines with his new album coming out this year. Her and Camila are already having a hard time maintaining their relationship because of how complicated things are with the “feud” and Camila having to stay in the closet, plus probably other unresolved issues between them - the new p.r plan is the last straw that breaks the camel’s back - they eventually mutually decide to break up and to try to figure themselves out without the other. Camila buries herself in work and Lauren parties away the pain. When Camren shippers keep coming at her from all sides she loses it and tweets that Camren “was never real, ever” to shut them down and probably to shut herself down too.

I still think they’re in touch, they keep each other updated on their lives, congratulate each other on the new projects.

I really do hope now that they both try to be with someone new, try to heal and figure out who they are without the other. I hope Camila gets to come out once her career is well established. I hope they can meet again in a little while and actually be together in open light and finally be able to be free to love each other.

The end, until the next chapter 😂

Again this is all theory, a big fanfic - saying this to all the haters out there, no need to bother sending me an ask, you’ll just be wasting your time ✌️

LINKIN PARK MEME.  Rest in peace, Chester Bennington. Your talent and wonderful personality gave so many people so much hope during their darkest of times, and you will be forever missed.

PAPERCUT.

  • Why does it feel like night today?
  • Why am I so uptight today?
  • Paranoia is all I got left.
  • I know what it feels like to have a voice in the back of my head.
  • It’s like I’m paranoid lookin’ over my back.
  • It’s like a whirlwind inside of my head.
  • It’s like I can’t stop what I’m hearing within.
  • Your paranoia’s probably worse.
  • I don’t know what set me off first.

ONE STEP CLOSER.

  • I cannot take this anymore.
  • I find bliss in ignorance.
  • I’m about to break.
  • I need a little room to breathe.
  • I’m one step closer to the edge.
  • I wish I could find a way to disappear.
  • Shut up when I’m talking to you.

POINTS OF AUTHORITY.

  • Forfeit the game.
  • You can’t run the race.
  • You just won’t last.
  • You love the way I look at you.
  • My pride is broken.
  • You like to think you’re never wrong.
  • You live with what you’ve learned.
  • You have to act like you’re someone.
  • You want someone to hurt like you.

CRAWLING.

  • These wounds they will not heal.
  • There’s something inside me that pulls beneath the surface.
  • This lack of self-control I fear is never-ending.
  • My walls are closing in.
  • I’ve felt this way before.

IN THE END.

  • It doesn’t even matter how hard you try.
  • Time is a valuable thing.
  • I wasted it all just to watch you go.
  • I kept everything inside.
  • Even though I tried, it all fell apart.
  • I tried so hard and got so far.
  • In the end? It doesn’t even matter.
  • I had to fall to lose it all.
  • You’re acting like I was part of your property.
  • You fought with me.
  • Things aren’t the way they were before.
  • You wouldn’t even recognise me anymore.
  • I’ve put my trust in you.

MY DECEMBER.

  • I just wish I didn’t feel.
  • I take back all the things I said.
  • I’d give it all away just to have somewhere to go.
  • I’d give it all away just to have someone to come home to.
  • This is all I need.

BREAKING THE HABIT.

  • Memories consume like an opening wound.
  • You all assume I’m safe here.
  • I don’t want to be the one.
  • I’m the one confused.
  • I don’t know what’s worth fighting for.
  • I don’t know why I instigate and say what I don’t mean.
  • I don’t know how I got this way.
  • I know it’s not alright.
  • I had no options left.
  • I’m the one at fault.
  • I’ll never fight again.
  • This is how it ends.

NUMB.

  • I’m tired of being what you want me to be.
  • I don’t know what you’re expecting of me.
  • I’m under the pressure of walking in your shoes.
  • Every step that I take is another mistake to you.
  • I’ve become so numb.
  • I can’t feel you there.
  • All I want is to be more like me and be less like you.
  • Can’t you see that you’re smothering me?
  • Everything that you thought I would be has fallen apart right in front of you.
  • I may end up failing.
  • You were just like me with someone disappointed in you.

LEAVE OUT ALL THE REST.

  • I dreamed I was missing.
  • You were so scared.
  • No one would listen because no one else cared.
  • What am I leaving when I’m done here?
  • Forget the wrong that I’ve done.
  • Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed.
  • Don’t resent me.
  • Keep me in your memory.
  • Don’t be afraid.
  • I’ve taken my beating.
  • I’m strong on the surface.
  • I’ve never been perfect.
  • I’ve never been perfect, but neither have you.
  • Save me from myself.

SHADOW OF THE DAY.

  • Sometimes solutions aren’t so simple.
  • Sometimes goodbye’s the only way.
  • The sun will set for you.
  • Your friends all plead for you to stay.
  • Sometimes beginnings aren’t so simple.

WHAT I’VE DONE.

  • There’s no need.
  • I’ve drawn regret from the truth.
  • Let mercy come and wash away what I’ve done.
  • Let go of what I’ve done.
  • I’m forgiving what I’ve done.

FAINT.

  • I said goodbye.
  • All I could think was I need a way to dig through the damage.
  • I see you takin’ advantage.
  • I found another reason to do this.
  • I wanna find a way to rattle you.
  • I’m not done.
  • There’s nothing left.
  • Darkness turned to light.
Something More

“I love you,” Castiel says. Quiet but sure.

Castiel says it for the first time on the way to a hunt out east. They’re on a nondescript stretch of road somewhere between Illinois and Pennsylvania. It’s dark out—the middle of the night— and Sam’s passed out in the back.

It comes out of nowhere, really. Hours of silence, both of them in their own world, and then—

“I love you,” Castiel says. Quiet but sure.

Dean’s grip on the wheel tightens, and when he turns to look at Castiel, the angel looks resolute. Sad, almost.

“Just so you know.”

And Dean almost has to laugh. Just so you know. As if he didn’t already. As if it hasn’t kept him up at night, sick with longing.

As if it changed anything.

“Dean?”

Dean takes a deep breath. Tries to push down the lump forming in his throat.

“Cas…” He meets Castiel’s eyes once again. The lights are playing across his face, and it takes everything Dean has not to reach for him. To draw him in by the back of his neck, to finally give in to this thing that’s been growing between them for years.

Instead, Dean says, “This is a bad idea.”

“I don’t understand.” There is a barely perceptible tremble in Castiel’s voice.

“Cas,” Dean says again. It comes out rough, and he clears his throat. Why is this so goddamn hard? “You know how I feel about you,” he manages.

“Yes. I suppose.”

“I want this to work, man. I want it so bad. You don’t— you have no idea.”

“Then why can’t it?”

“Because we don’t get to have things like that. Not in this life. This has never worked, no matter how much I want it to. No matter how much Sam wants it to. The people we care about end up dead.” He lets out a breath. “I can’t lose you.”

He looks at Castiel, but Castiel’s face is blank, his gaze fixed on the road in front of them.

“That’s no way to live,” Castiel says, finally, and the anger in his voice catches Dean by surprise. “You can’t go through life denying yourself of things because you’re afraid. Life is too short.” He turns to Dean, and there’s fire in his eyes. “You of all people should understand that.”

Dean’s chest feels tight.

“Do me a favor,” Castiel says, softer now. “Please.”

“Yeah?” Dean croaks.

“Try. Just try with me, Dean.”

And Dean turns to Castiel once more, meets his eyes, sees the hope there. Castiel reaches across the space between them, his palm up. An offering.

“Please,” he says again.

“Yeah,” Dean says, almost a whisper. He takes Castiel’s hand in his, their palms sliding easily together. “Okay.”

Castiel squeezes his hand, gentle, and Dean feels some of the pressure release from his chest. He nods, mostly to himself, directing his attention back to the road.

“Okay.”

time.com
An African-American Jockey Hasn't Won the Kentucky Derby for More Than a Century. Here's Why
When it became possible to make a good living riding, things changed
By Olivia B. Waxman

As jockeys who weren’t black saw African-American jockeys making a good living off of horse-racing, Murphy was an example of someone who became “a victim of his own success,” says Pellom McDaniels III, author of The Prince of Jockeys: The Life of Isaac Burns Murphy and an Assistant Professor of African American Studies at Emory University. In the 1890 season, Murphy was accused of being an alcoholic and drunk on the back of a horse. McDaniels says that, in his research, he discovered that Murphy was actually drugged.

Many black jockeys were sabotaged, to the point where, by the early 20th century, they were becoming more of a rarity in the sport. Jimmy Winkfield was the last African-American jockey to win the Kentucky Derby, in 1902, and he ended up going to Europe and making a name for himself in Russia, France and Germany.

(cont.)

Former slaves and immediate descendants knew the horses and took care of them, naturally becoming jockeys.

Black jockeys were making way too much money and white people wanted in.

Black jockeys were drugged and sabotaged, and now there are no more Black jockeys.

The older I get, the more amazed I am that these little nuggets of America Ain’t Shit keep crossing my path. Things I never even imagined just weaving themselves into the tapestry of white men doing whatever they could to keep every other group underfoot.

When Sherlock is too pretty

Can you imagine the self restraint that John has to show when Sherlock walks around being god-damn pretty in his posh suits with the straining buttons on his shirt and the long graceful line of his neck and that ridiculously pouty mouth, I mean phew it’s just illegal.

Well what if one day Sherlock just looks too fucking good and John’s mouth starts talking before he can censor himself and he says way too fiercely:

“I want to fucking mess you up.”

There’s an awkward silence. John goes red, Sherlock looks alarmed. John is never ever coming back from this. 

“Go for it,” says Sherlock.

And that’s how they ended up having smutty, smutty sex, guys. 


Hiya, I’m Phoebe ;) I started this Sherlock blog very recently, and would love to make more friends!! If you fancy you could check out my blog or my AO3. Ta.

Reasons To Love Svt

  • not so Subjectively the best group ever 
  • They were supposed to debut years before they actually did 
  • The fact they kept going after something like that 
  • Like we get upset when a single members been training for a long time cough sm rookies cough
  • But svt as a group had to wait 
  • But when they did debut they were such a hit 
  • Like carats couldn’t be more proud
  • They grew in popularity so fast too 
  • We couldn’t be more proud 
  • The relationships between the members is half the fun
  • They love each other like family so much 
  • Constantly looking out for each other 
  • Seungkwan feeling bad about his body?
  • 12 other members will be right by his side to reassure him he’s perfect just the way he is
  • Mingyu messing with the filters because he’s worried about his skin color?
  • Someone will be saying he doesn’t need a filter within seconds 
  • When chan graduated a good handful went to go see him
  • Like if that isn’t love what is?
  • With 13 members you’d think someone is bound to get left out 
  • And not that it doesn’t always happen 
  • The members do make efforts to include each other 
  • They are always having fun no matter how tired they are or how late it is
  • Turning lights out on each other when they are taking showers 
  • Playing rock paper scissors at restaurants to see who has to ask the owner to play their songs 
  • You can just tell they genuinely love each other like family 
  • Like lets be real
  • If you spent so much of your time with that large amount of people 
  • You would totally find someone, if not multiple people that clash with your personalty 
  • And i’m sure these guys have had that happen
  • But they’ve worked past that
  • To the point where us fans cant even tell 
  • And boy we find out a lot of things lol
  • What Im trying to say is that they are totally accepting of each other and i find that amazing
  • They love their carats so much 
  • So so much 
  • Like when they each wrote an encouraging letter for students taking the SAT
  • The amount of work they put into making their performances perfect for their carats 
  • They’ve been through so much for us
  • They always bow so deeply at their concerts and it breaks me 
  • Seventeen in carat land was honestly the most beautiful thing
  • Their carats love them just as much, if not more
  • Like ask a carat what they love about svt
  • And they will either go on for hours 
  • And never run out of things to say
  • Or just be so overwhelmed they can’t even say anything
  • Because their love for the boys is just too much
  • Its adorable
  • All of them are super sweet people 
  • Constantly encouraging the members 
  • And always so content with anything svt gives us like 
  • Carats are so sweet
  • Super artsy too i dont understand 
  • Predebut videos are better than any other groups omg 
  • Your bias list is never safe when stanning svt because everyone is perfect 
  • All the carrot puns we can make and they make
  • They are literally a giant meme 
  • And they never fail to put a smile on our face 
  • Idk if yall have noticed but svt has been making an effort to be more active on social media 
  • They even did live shows on instagram 
  • And they’ve posted so much stuff on all their social media 
  • They blessed us with their dance covers of happiness and wild eye 
  • Synchronization kings 
  • When i first saw wild eye i was so confused 
  • Because i thought my video had frozen
  • But nope
  • That was just part of the dance
  • They have such a unique style
  • Like three units but one group
  • And they still all function as one working group 
  • 13 members, 3 units, 1 team = Seventeen 
  • Hella attractive 
  • Like seventeen is just made up of 13 visuals 
  • Everything they do is so amazingly aesthetic 
  • Their music is perfect 
  • That one time we thought we were getting a dark concept 
  • And it said Only for today 
  • And we were like !!!!!!!!
  • But they literally meant only for one day
  • It was just a black and white filter 
  • And we were freaking speechless 
  • Lmao that was a wild time 
  • But the fact that even the rappers can sing
  • And it sounds like heaven 
  • They are all really respectful 
  • We’ve all heard stories from staff thats worked with them 
  • And there is never anything bad to say about them
  • They cover girl groups in a respectful way and aren’t making fun of the songs like pretty much every other boy group out there
  • They aren’t in it for the fame 
  • They just want to make music
  • Cause i mean, lets be real, if their only goal was to be famous they wouldn’t have have ended up at Pledis lol
  • They are super super humble
  • How hype they get with each other 
  • They are their number one fans 
  • No one loves svt more than svt loves them
  • Its fantastic 
  • Freaking Bong Bong
  • Our lovely Kim Bong Bong
  • The fact that bongbongie represents the fans 
  • And they have named it genderless 
  • And hoshi broke down the stereotype that pretty eyes equals girl
  • Like when will your faves ever?
  • Their stages are freaking lit 
  • They go all out 
  • Whether youre there at the concert or watching a video of it 
  • You’ll get super pumped
  • And you can just feel the passion radiating out of the video 
  • Because they put 110% into everything they do
  • Stanning svt is like finding a new home 
  • Everyone is welcoming and warm
  • The guys just make you smile all the time
  • No matter what they are doing
  • Their love is neverending 
  • And everything is so personal and relatable
  • It feels like you know them personally and not like they are some famous untouchable group 
  • Everything about them just makes me smile and they can improve my mood like no other group
Animal Crossing Starters:
  • “I figured you must be blackmailing that poor girl to have lunch with you.”
  • “I think it’s fair to say that I’m pretty sexy.”
  • “I don’t want to live in a world where I have to eat sugar free sugar cookies.”
  • “I remembered today was your birthday so I thought I’d say hi.”
  • “You have nothing to lose except your lonely loser status.”
  • “Shut it, you faker!”
  • “I sure am tired from all that relaxing I did today.”
  • “Then I can spend my entire allowance on comic books and video games and no one can stop me.”
  • “When you listen to pop music, you often hear them saying ‘shawty.’”
  • “[NAME] made fun of me because I say 'poot’ all the time.”
  • “I waited and waited because I really wanted to see you.”
  • “Tell papa/mama what’s up.”
  • “It hurts my face just looking at you.”
  • “Marry me.”
  • “I look forward to seeing what you’re gonna do with my butt.”
  • “A trash bin..? Is this a clue to your true identity?”
  • “I’m beautiful, but I’m also deadly.”
  • “I hope you go to jail.”
  • “What did you do to my body?”
  • “Stick to chocolate and comic books. You’re too young for love anyway.”
  • “I’m sorry.. please don’t be too mad at me.”
  • “I have a big favor to ask you.”
  • “Maybe I’ll just go home and lock myself in a closet.”
  • “I gotta admit, I really love that one show where all those people do the stuff and then something happens.”
  • “Here, touch my skin. It’s totally slimy right now.”
  • “I probably look in the mirror 24 times a day just to be sure I’m still so darned handsome/beautiful.”
  • “Guess what I’ve got in my pockets right now.”
  • “Better not catch you making goo-goo eyes at my wife/husband.”
  • “No one understands me. I’m hungry all the time and no one cares.”
  • “Are you suggesting my style is outdated?”
  • “Don’t play with stink bugs, especially when you’ve got a date coming up.”
  • “They don’t even care who wins. They just all flex their pecs.”
  • “Love means accepting that there will be times when you don’t get the last scallop.”
  • “Yeah exercise is totally hard and stuff. I think I’m gonna go take a nap and read a book or whatever.”
  • “Today was the day my best friend in the whole wide world was born.”
  • “Whoa you look so weird. And not weird in a hip way. More like 'weird’ as in 'makes me want to barf.’”
  • “End my suffering.”
  • “Not to sound corny but I really like you.”
  • “I wonder how I can say 'swaggy ’ in the most grown up way possible.”
  • “Just because two people are good friends doesn’t mean they’d make a good couple.”
  • “Sorry, I was staring at your face because I don’t know you. Not because there’s something wrong with your face.”
  • “Would it surprise you if I said I’m pretty proud of my legs?”
  • “The truth is never free.. but sometimes it’s on sale.”
  • “I hear the sound of rap coming from somewhere.”
  • “They tell you to sleep on a problem. But what if your problem is insomnia?”
  • “I’ll just observe your friends from the shadows.”
  • “I heard allergies are caused by the government.”
  • “Watch out, 'cause I’ll compliment you until you puke.”
  • “So D.I.Y. stands for 'do it yourself’? Well, if these guys think I’m going to do my own manual labor, they’ve got another acronym coming.”
  • “I can smell your confidence. Smells like soup.”
  • “I’m gay.”
  • “You’re my hero.”
  • “Please don’t call on me.”
  • “I think I dropped my house key somewhere. That was my favorite key… it opened my house.”
  • “Do you want to hear the brutal truth? That outfit is a hot mess.”
  • “Oh, I get it! You’re playing it cool. Trying your best not to cry.”

space-mouse  asked:

this has undoubtedly been said before but: older married klance where they never part ways without an exchange of "i love you"s and a kiss from lance on the forehead, even when they're upset w each other. bc during the war they didn't want anything harsh to end up their last words, and they just never fell out of the habit. though now it's based more on affection than worry :')

anonymous asked:

Ok so I just read some of your posts about martial arts, and if I understood it right, is that greater muscle mass doesn't actually make you stronger, it just makes it easier/faster to build up strength. Thinking of the upper body, if you have two individuals where one has more mm than the other (or a man/woman), on the assumption that both have equal capacity and training, the person with greater mm wouldn't directly be *stronger* because of the mm, but has just progressed faster? Is that it?

So, here’s the thing. Martial arts do not rely on strength, some techniques such as joint locks and throws require no strength at all. Muscle helps, but it is not comparable to understanding of technique. You’re not actually going to be build up a lot of muscle mass when practicing martial arts techniques by themselves. You will when doing endurance training and strength training separately, but that’s about it. Then, in the more advanced section, we get into the admission that its not about how hard you hit but rather where (and how deeply the force penetrates the body).

You don’t need to be physically “strong” to break bricks, for example. Rather, it’s a question of your ability to visualize past an object so the force carries through.

Most of martial arts is about manipulation of body mechanics to generate force. Muscles help, but not as much as most people think and certainly not in the way they think. The average athlete will have more muscle mass and muscular definition than the average martial artist. For fighting, endurance trumps flat physical strength. Too much of a certain type of muscle, such as that seen on a body builder, becomes detrimental. After all, muscle weighs more than fat. If you’re totally ripped, it becomes more difficult to move quickly which is detrimental and the amount of weight you’re carrying around reduces the length of time you can fight.

More than that, different humans develop visible definition in their musculature at different rates. In some cases, it requires a very specific, pointed regimen to get the look you see off of body builders and actors. Women have a very difficult time achieving visible definition, especially in their upper body. So, being able to see muscle doesn’t necessarily mean it isn’t there.

So, you’re still thinking about it wrong. Muscle mass (as in the size of your muscles) isn’t what’s important. There are essentially two different kinds of muscles that one can develop.

1) the ones gained by stretching/elongating the muscle over a period of time, which is what you get from most sports like running and general aerobic exercise.

2) the ones gained by tearing the muscles so they build up over time, this is what you get from body-building, weight lifting, pushups, and other similar exercises.

For a combatant, the first one is actually more important because it emphasizes building of endurance. Your muscles remain lean, you build up wind, though you won’t gain much in the way of definition. The second one is also important but in moderation as too much muscle mass will actually impede movement and slow you down. One is endurance, the other is strength. Endurance is far more necessary, because that’s what allows you to fight for a prolonged period of time without growing tired.

The problem is the vast majority of the population is only aware of the second and most obvious type of muscle. They place all the emphasis on it. Ironically, of course, this shouldn’t be news to fans of Dragonball Z. Where the problem of over emphasizing training on building up muscle mass gets addressed during the Cell Saga. (Kudos for anyone who remembers which Super Saiyan got their butt whipped.) In this case, a bodybuilder would be at a greater disadvantage in a fight as opposed to a runner.

The second thing to understand about women is that they have what’s called a subcutaneous layer of fat underneath the surface of the skin. For some women, it is very difficult to build up any sort of visible definition and sometimes even requires a specific type workout regimen to achieve it. This doesn’t mean these women don’t have muscle, it’s just not visible and that makes it hard to accurately judge how much. Women also develop muscle differently from men, having an easier time building up their legs and their core than the upper body. However, those are just as essential to combat as your upper body. Your core is your primary means of maintaining balance, and acts as the body’s centerpoint. If you’ve got a weak center, it doesn’t matter how strong your arms are.

The third thing to understand is about rippling muscles. The more visible the muscle, the easier it is to find the pressure points. Most pressure points on the body exist in the places where separate muscles meet, so the more definition someone has then the easier they are to find.

If you assume both have equal capacity and training, then it doesn’t matter how much muscle mass is visible or who has more.

The issue you keep running into is in thinking that muscle = strength, which it doesn’t. The second is the assumption that physical strength is what matters, which again it doesn’t.

Technical proficiency matters. Endurance matters. Wind, as in how much oxygen you can get into your body, matters. Balance matters, your core muscles as in the abdominal muscles are the most important muscles to develop. The rest of it? Less so.

 Physical strength can enhance, but only to a certain, limited degree. In martial arts, force is generated through the motion. Being able to deadlift 200 pounds doesn’t mean you can hit with anywhere near 200 pounds of force when your arm is moving. The amount of weight you lift doesn’t translate to force. Instead, we look to how force is generated through the movement of the body. To generate the maximum amount of force in a punch, you need to throw your whole body behind it.

This means your hand, your wrist, your arm, your shoulder are working in concert with your hips and your legs and your feet. However, there is a limit to how much force can be generated. A kick creates more momentum and is more powerful than a punch. Techniques where you spin, such as the spinning backfist or the wheelkick, are more powerful than the average martial arts technique. The more momentum you generate, the harder you hit. The same goes for jump kicks. The more momentum there is, the more force created. When you’re talking a judo or aikido throw, the point is to let the opponent’s body do the work for you. You get them into the air and their body in motion provides the force when they hit the ground. You don’t need to be strong, you just need to get them moving.

Martial arts techniques both offensive and defensive revolve around the concept of creating, negating, and redirecting momentum. This includes both yours and your opponent’s.

Here is a simple example:

Someone charges at you. You’ve got three options. You can stand there and take it. You can attempt to negate the charge by grabbing hold of them as they come and springing your feet backwards so you both likely end up on the ground. Or, you can get out of the way. (Maybe, you risk sticking your foot out to trip them.)

These are the basic concepts of martial arts defense.

It doesn’t really matter if it’s a big person charging you or a small one. It will matter a lot more if they are a linebacker, a wrestler, or someone who understands how to slam their shoulder into their opponent’s core to knock them over.

I get that this concept runs directly counter to the way combat is presented in media, and that’s why it ends up harder to comprehend. Just as many people end up discouraged when they start exercising to lose weight and end up gaining instead, because they were never taught that muscle weighs more than fat. That muscle will eat your fat, and help them achieve the body they want. All they know is weight itself as an aggregate is bad, if they are gaining then exercise must not be working, and they end up quitting because of it.

If you think about combat primarily in terms of strength then you will miss all the other fundamental pieces that are ultimately more important. When martial artists talk about “strength”, they’re usually referring to the generation of momentum rather or the technique’s effectiveness rather than how much you can lift or some other definition of physical strength.

Otherwise, the word you’re looking for fortitude.

-Michi

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The Arrangement (pt 1)

A/N: I’ve always kind of liked reading these arranged marriage scenarios cuz they can get to be a little angsty, and y’all know I’m a sucker for angst. Let me know if you want a part 2, or I’m not going to write it hehe. I don’t think this will end up being 10 parts like IDMI, but ya never know. 


You never thought it would happen to you, but it did. You always imagined falling in love with a boy, dating for a year or two, and finally get married to someone you were sure about. 

But instead, your parents pushed you into a marriage all because of some promise your grandparents had made way back in the past. You didn’t even know about said promise until you were quite literally forced to get engaged to some stranger. 

Your parents tried to ease your way into the marriage, saying you could date this man while you two were engaged. And since you weren’t exactly the best at scoring a date, you thought that maybe this wasn’t so bad. Maybe it would be one of those fateful connections. You thought that maybe you would just happen to fall in love with him while you were engaged.

But if anything, you grew to dislike him. Park Jimin didn’t like you, and he made sure to let you know. Like you, he also didn’t know of the promise between the grandparents. And he was fuming. 

So there were no happy dates. No hand holding, no hugs, and definitely no sweet kisses. You were engaged, exchanged a few short words, and before you knew it, you were getting changed into your white wedding gown. Your friend had to constantly tell you to stop crying because it was going to ruin your makeup. 

You always dreamed of this day. To be the happiest day of your life. But instead, you felt like you were being sentenced to life in hell. Because what else is living with a man who despises you?


A day passes into a week and a week eventually turns into a month. You wished it went by quickly, but each day was incredibly slow. You didn’t even know if the days were passing as each day was the same.

You would wake up, get ready for work, and quickly make a breakfast for you and your “hubby”. He would eat without a word and quickly retreat back to his room. Hell, you didn’t even share a room. Thankfully, the parents bought you a house with a few rooms, allowing you and Jimin to sleep in rooms in completely opposite ends of the house. 

You would leave for work after cleaning up breakfast and after a long day at work, you would come home to an empty house. You don’t really know when Jimin would come home from work, but you made it a habit to always a have a meal waiting for him if and when he came home. 

You rarely talked to each other and the silence was slowly eating you away. You had managed to convince your parents that this was, in fact, a happy marriage to keep them at peace at least. And apparently, Jimin had told his parents the same. 

Some nights, you had to cry yourself to sleep, cursing your fate. But little did you know, that this fateful encounter was one that was going to change your life, more than it had already done so already.


A/N: I know this was kinda vague, but I intended it to be. I promise the next part will be more in detail…if you want a second part that is. Let me know, or I won’t write one! 

sourcatsmiles  asked:

"You love me, right?" For Ladynoir

It was not the way he expected it to go down. Which, honestly, was rather impressive because in the past two years of their partnership Chat Noir must have plotted out at least 50 different possible scenarios in which he finally heard the coveted words. 

They had been joking around, legs swinging off the edge of of the parapet and laughing, enjoying the warm breeze. 

“Come on, you can’t tell me that your birthday is this week and not let me get you a present,” Chat whined, “what sort of partner would I be.” 

“The last thing I need for my birthday is a dead rat on my doorstep,” Ladybug teased as she once again failed to do a Jacob’s ladder with her Yo-yo. She scowled down at her weapon and Chat had to bite back a laugh. There was something incredibly endearing about the fact that for all the truly amazing things she had done with the magical item, she couldn’t seem to get the hang of a simple trick. 

“Ah, but you know that I won’t be giving you that, because I don’t know where your doorway is,” Chat grinned, “so your argument against my giving you a gift is invalid.” 

She rolled her eyes, but he could see her fighting back a smile. 

“Come on,” he whispered, dropping his chin onto her shoulder, “I’ll get you anything you want.” 

“Anything?” she asked, twisting her head to look at him and causing their noses to brush together. 

“Cross my heart and swear not to die, because I already promised you I wouldn’t after what happened last month.” 

She narrowed her eyes at him, her lips twisting into the disapproving pout that had become one of his favorite expressions. Not that he had a lack of those where she was concerned. Still, this particular look of fond annoyance was easily in the top 20. 

“Please?” he cajoled, stretching out the vowels like a hopeful child asking for a new toy. 

She looked away and Chat smiled. If she couldn’t meet his eyes it meant she was caving. 

“If Mayor Bourgeois is allowed to give you a statue, the least I should be allowed to do is get you a birthday present,” he whispered, trying not to fist pump as he saw her bite her lower lip. Victory was almost assured at this point. “Please?” he said again. 

“Anything?” she asked hesitantly. 

“Anything,” he assured her in the same quiet voice while internally he screamed in triumph. In fact he would probably be annoying Plagg later with his obligatory victory dance. 

Ladybug said nothing, continuing to stare out into the night, but Chat had learned patience was the key to these sorts of moods, so he simply waited, his head continuing to lull against her shoulder. 

“Chat?”

“Yes My Lady?”

“You love me right?” 

He felt his breath catch in his throat. He knew she didn’t mean it the way he wanted her to. It was a friendly statement, a joking lead-in to a request that usually meant she was insecure about something. It wasn’t the first time she had said it, but he still couldn’t help but be affected by the words. 

“Of course, to the end of my nine lives and beyond,” he said, his tone light despite the rapid pounding of his heart. 

“And you won’t make fun of me?” she said, with just enough of a tremor in her voice to belie her playful smile. 

“Never. Cat’s honor.” 

She took a deep breath and reached her hand up to pull at the collar of her suit. 

“What are you doing?” Chat squawked his face turning beet red as her fingers slide beneath the fabric and down towards her collar bone. 

She gave him a bemused smirk as she pulled out a carefully folded note, much to Chat’s simultaneous relief and dismay. 

“Never figured you for a prude,” she said tapping him on the nose with the paper. 

“What is so important that you felt the need to carry it around under your suit?” he grumbled, then instantly regretted his outburst when her shoulders hunched slightly. “Is it a picture of me? Admit it you pull it out to stare at it when I am not around.” He gave her his most salacious smirk and she gave him a playful shove, the momentary flash of doubt replaced with amusement. He mentally high fived himself on the nice save. Another thing to brag to Plagg about when they got home. 

“No. It’s a letter.” 

“I assume you are either going to elaborate, or you have decided to pursue a lifelong dream of becoming the world’s greatest calligrapher.” 

“What?”

“Never mind, you never did appreciate my sense of humor.” 

“It’s a letter for my crush.” 

His heart sank. 

“It’s stupid,” she said hurriedly, “it’s not even signed. I don’t know what is wrong with me that I can’t even bring myself to give him an anonymous love letter. I stupidly thought that maybe I would get lucky and could run in to him as Ladybug and maybe then I could…” she trailed off with a miserable laugh that broke his heart far worse than her infatuation with someone else. 

“My Lady-” 

“It’s horrible,” she cried, scooting back just enough so that she could look at him, “seriously, you have no idea how pathetic I have been.” 

“Come on it can’t be that bad.”

“For months I couldn’t even speak a complete sentence in front of him,” she wailed, “much less tell him how I feel!” 

“That’s totally normal.” 

“Oh, it get’s better. Because I wasn’t just content to make a fool of myself. No then I compensated by getting worse! My room is plastered with pictures of him. I have one framed on my nightstand!” 

“You are hardly the first person alive to go overboard about a crush,” Chat said thinking of his own hoard of fangirls that had only increased as he edged closer to adulthood.” 

“I wrote down his schedule on my calendar. In detail! Every time I learned something new, up it would go in big swirly cursive with little hearts and everything.” 

“OK, that’s admittedly a little weirder,” Chat winced, although he was somewhat amused at the image of her dotting little hearts all over the place, “still it could be-” 

“I stole his phone!”

“OK yeah, you’re crazy.”

“I told you. Instead of just confessing to him like a normal person I turned into,” she gestured helplessly at herself, “this.” 

“But at least you admit it,” he said kindly. “and if need be I can get you the name of an excellent therapist.” 

She gave him a weak smile, and he wrapped an arm around her, pulling her into a gentle hug. 

“I thought if I could just give him this letter, even if he didn’t know it was from me, then I could… I donnow, not move on exactly but, get better, maybe?” 

She fiddled with the piece of paper in her hand and somehow, seeing her like this- relaxed and vulnerable, and just a little bit insane- made him love her even more. 

Maybe they would never amount to anything. Maybe she would end up with this mystery crush, or the next one. But in that moment Chat knew that he would never regret loving this girl. He would be happy to stay by her side in whatever way she needed him. That would be enough. 

“Do you want me to give it to him for you?” he asked, any regret he might have felt vanishing at the hopeful look that sprang to her eyes. 

“Would you?” 

“Of course Bugaboo. Although, if this turns into some sort of wacky rom-com where he thinks that I am the secret admirer and starts chasing after my dazzling good looks and unparalleled charm, you are not allowed to make it my fault.” 

“Ok,” she laughed, leaning her head back against his shoulder with a sigh that he could swear reverberated in his very soul. 

“So who am I delivering this to anyways?” he asked a little shakily carefully plucking the letter from her and slipping into into the pocket of his suit. “Who is this dashing rogue who has turned you into a literal lovesick schoolgirl?” 

“Adrien Agreste,” she confessed with a blush. “I’m in love with Adrien Agreste.” 

It was definitely not how he had expected things to go down. Never in a million years would he have dreamed up this scenario when he finally heard the coveted words- his name on her tongue, her voice saying that she loved him, HIM, of all people. 

It was not what he expected- but damn if it still wasn’t the greatest moment in his life. 



Look who’s back to her 4 word prompts! On to the next one! (Not taking any new ones just finishing up the ones I have.