"Harry went through everything Snape went through and turned out fine!"
First of all, Harry did not go through exactly what Snape went through. There were many resources Harry had to help him recover from his abuse that Snape never had access to. Second of all, abuse does not affect every single victim the same way. Everyone is different. Regardless, I’m still going to go through all the advantages Harry had over Snape so that people stop pitting two very different abuse survivors against each other.
1. Snape grew up in abject poverty. Harry inherited a huge fortune from his parents and the Dursleys were fairly wealthy as well, even if they spent very little of their wealth on Harry. However, Harry had enough of his basic needs provided for him to keep him alive and healthy. Snape was most likely ill and underfed throughout much of his childhood.
2. Harry had a very supportive group of friends, one of whom was able to give Harry an escape from his abusive relatives. Snape had one true friend throughout his childhood who was unable to do much about his home situation. Harry’s friends were also there to defend him from bullies like Draco Malfoy. We only see Lily intervene to help Snape when he gets bullied by the Marauders once and we know what happens after that.
3. Harry’s teachers were very supportive of him and were always looking out for him. Snape’s teachers refused to do anything about the Marauders because of how much they liked them.
4. What went on between Draco and Harry at school was a rivalry. Both parties were always equally matched; it was either Harry vs. Draco, Harry and his two best friends vs. Draco and his two best friends, or the Gryffindors vs. the Slytherins. What went on between the Marauders and Snape was relentless bullying (four on one is bullying, a rivalry requires both sides to be equally matched) that got as bad as sexual assault and attempted murder. As stated previously, Snape had very little help to defend him from his bullies.
5. Harry was generally surrounded by Voldemort’s opponents and had his life threatened by Voldemort and his supporters on multiple occasions. Snape was generally surrounded by Voldemort’s supporters and constantly bullied by four of Voldemort’s opponents. Voldemort’s supporters were also the only people who offered Snape a proper escape from the neglect and abuse he had suffered his whole life. Therefore it makes sense which sides these two people chose to fight on.
Regardless of the different circumstances Snape and Harry grew up in, both of their experiences with abuse are completely valid. The sad truth is that without a support system, very few abuse victims turn out like Harry. Many turn out like Snape or Credence unless they are given access to the resources necessary for them to heal. However, even if two abuse victims with the exact same circumstances turn out differently, that does not invalidate either victim’s experience with abuse. The fact remains that we are all different humans and that trauma can affect all of us differently.