Greenpoint, Brooklyn. $900.00

“I use YOUR room as storage for my many pairs of shoes”

“If you’re strange, creepy, smelly, antisocial, a hoarder, albino, grotesque, eerie, nocturnal, eat prunes or beets, have night terrors, ask me to wax your back, OR go through my shit…..I WILL physically remove you from the apartment.”

“no windows”

Union Square, Manhattan. $1000.00

“I am looking for someone to move into a large closet space in one of the three bedrooms of my apartment. The bedroom has two closets but there is no need for it so we are looking to sublet it as a living space to a 4th roommate. The closet is about 5 feet wide and 7 feet long. It has no windows and think it would be ideal for a twin size bed and small night stand.”

“Amazing Location”