the signs having a crush
  • Aries:gets overly bashful when talking to him/her
  • Taurus:has many dreams of the two of them going out—but never tries to start anything
  • Gemini:ends up becoming bestfriends with the person
  • Cancer:very subtle about it and hardly brings it up
  • Leo:always tries to spend time with them
  • Virgo:constantly teasing their crush
  • Libra:always trying to deny their own feelings for the "crush"
  • Scorpio:too afraid to text them first
  • Sagittarius:talks about them constantly
  • Capricorn:listens to sappy love songs and tries to relate everything in them to oneself
  • Aquarius:always looking for the other person even when they know he/she isn't around
  • Pisces:makes cute little drawings on random pieces of paper of their two names combined
The Zodiac signs locked in a closet together
  • Aries:Hey guys listen to my opinions you didn't ask to hear about.
  • Taurus:I'm right. You're wrong. You lose. End of story.
  • Cancer:*sobs in corner*
  • Leo:Alright. So I think it's clear. I'm in charge of this closet.
  • Virgo:Can you all just shut the fuck up and help me organize the shit in this closet.
  • Libra:Whyyyy can'ttt weeeee beee friends
  • Scorpio:who what where when why and sometimes how?
  • Sagittarius:Let's all just get naked.
  • Capricorn:Just spit ballin ideas here but can I be valedictorian of this room?
  • Aquarius:Well this has been a lovely time.
  • Pisces:brb detaching myself from this situation.
What the signs would want to do during christmas
  • Aries:Go to a theme park with friends
  • Taurus:Have a sleepover party
  • Gemini:Recieve presents
  • Cancer:Kiss their crush under the mistletoe
  • Leo:Shopping spree cus christmas sales
  • Virgo:Decorating the house
  • Libra:Go to a nice place and take pics of them in the snow
  • Scorpio:Have a christmas date with their crush
  • Sagittarius:Get drunk and be crazy
  • Capricorn:everyone to give them a xmas present as well as a birthday present so they will get more presents
  • Aquarius:Stargaze with their crush/do crazy stuff w crush
  • Pisces:Binge on christmas movies with their crush
the signs when angered
  • Aries:starts a fist fight
  • Taurus:eats
  • Gemini:forgets why they're mad after a few hours
  • Cancer:shrugs it off and acts like nothing's wrong
  • Leo:sleeps off the rage
  • Virgo:gets overly dramatic
  • Libra:lashes out
  • Scorpio:constantly brings the problem up even when the situation is long over with
  • Sagittarius:gives the other person the cold shoulder and death stares
  • Capricorn:rants and rants and rants and rants
  • Aquarius:pretends like they aren't angered
  • Pisces:cries
The signs in a gang

Leaders: Aries,Capricorn

The ones in charge of ‘‘cleaning’‘ : Aquarius,Virgo,Capricorn

The cutie pies who are dangerous asf: Pisces,Cancer

The ones in charge of the weapons: Scorpio,Taurus

The sexy gang girlfriends: Libra,Sagittarius,Leo,Gemini

The ones who always have to clean the image of the gang: Gemini,Pisces,Leo

The ones who still go to school: Virgo,Capricorn,Libra

The ones who always start the gang wars because of bad temper: Capricorn,Scorpio,Aries

The one who ends the wars: Pisces

The parents of the gang: Taurus,Cancer,Virgo

The ones who throw the drug parties and bring the money in: Aquarius,Sagittarius and sometimes Capricorn

(requested by anon!)


Cute stuff the zodiac signs do when in a relationship

Aries and Capricorn kisses you on the shoulder and tucks the covers around you when they go to work/school while you have a day off and can sleep in.

Taurus writes you cute love letters/notes for you to open when they are not there.

Gemini likes to climb under your shirt while you’re still wearing it, it’s the cutest thing ever!

When you wake a Cancer sign and Pisces up a little, they’ll just hug you, go ‘nope’ and refuse to let you get up for a few minutes.

Leo and Scorpio always has to touch you. It could be holding your hand or just coming up behind you and circling your middle. They also kiss your hand or wrist so often that they probably don’t even realize they are doing it.

Virgo and Aquarius gets up to check on the pets when they do little cries in their sleep and cuddles them until they settle down and comes back to bed like a mother/father would a baby. So caring, it’s sexy!

Libra and Sagittarius will randomly come up just to dip you real low and literally sweep you off your feet. Every good relationship needs a good romantic dip every so often, right? ;-)

Keywords For The Signs
  • Aries:Temperamental, Impatient, Social, Bossy, Brave, Optimistic.
  • Taurus:Patient, Down to earth, Artistic, Insensitive, Possessive, Lazy.
  • Gemini:Curious, Funny, CHARMING, Intellectual, Talkative, Nervous, Flirty.
  • Cancer:Emotional, Kind, Graceful, Maternal, Clingy, Possessive.
  • Leo:Social, Bossy, A Leader, Selfish, Loving, Fun.
  • Virgo:Intellectual, Practical, Witty, Harsh, Dependable, Critical.
  • Libra:Romantic, Cheerful, CHARMING, Indecisive.
  • Scorpio:Mysterious, Possessive, Jealous, Seductive, Deep.
  • Sagittarius:Sassy, Impatient, Independent, Adventurous, Philosophical.
  • Capricorn:Cold, Patient, Funny, Harsh, Selfish, Serious, Ambitious.
  • Aquarius:Flirty, Talkative, Social, Witty, Unemotional.
  • Pisces:Sensitive, Manipulative, Dreamy, Loving.
What Each Sign Wants for Christmas
  • Aries - To conquer the world; will settle for a big leather belt
  • Taurus - A ten-year gift subscription to gourmet magazine; also        learning to “channel” the spirit of Julia Childs
  • Gemini - More technology. More, more!
  • Cancer - Three days a month of “rent-a-mother” services
  • Leo - A diamond-studded, leather bound copy of “Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous”
  • Virgo - Everything green - clothes, food, thumb, jewelry and house
  • Libra - Private lessons with the most famous interior decorator in town
  • Scorpio - His or her own private copy of “Poisons Prepared From Household Plants”
  • Sagittarius - Two weeks at a dude ranch
  • Capricorn - The book “101 Cheap Ways to Fix Up Your House”
  • Aquarius - To host a War of the Worlds reenactment via podcast
  • Pisces - Insert illogical aquarium joke because you’re a fucking fish and I wrote this entire thing just to fuck with you.
( 100% accurate) legitimate things the signs have said to their moms
  • Aries:hey mom my periods a bit late get ready to call MTV
  • Taurus:can u not eat like that
  • Gemini:no mom I don't need help with my math homework
  • Cancer:mom I promise u this is a movie u don't want to see
  • Leo:if u take me to chipotle I promise I'll pay u back l8er
  • Virgo:srry mom I didn't get ur call I was too busy doing crystal meth
  • Libra:aye I know u just made dinner but— do u wanna order me a pizza plz
  • Scorpio:mom my friend wanted to come over but I didn't rlly want to hang out so I told her u said i couldn't do anything, ok?
  • Sagittarius:ok mom how about u let the dog outside
  • Capricorn:mom I'll be fine without a jacket ok
  • Aquarius:stop calling me I'm with my friends
  • Pisces:mom u legitimately do not understand
The signs' most irrational pet peeve

Aries: People who leave time on the microwave and don’t clear the clock. They get so mad that they’ll throw the microwave out the window.

Taurus: When someone yawns with their mouth open, and makes the loudest possible noise they can, while also stretching their arms like they’re about to fucking fly away.

Gemini: People who hold the door for them when they are a hundred foot away. It makes them feel obligated to start the awkward half walk, half jog combination that makes anyone feel like an idiot.

Cancer: People that try to enter a train/any public transportation before letting people get off.

Leo: When they text or tell people a long joke or something funny, and they only reply with lol. A simple ‘haha that’s funny’ or even a ‘wow haha’ sounds more sincere.

Virgo: Crumbs in the butter. Come on you guys, how hard is it to wipe your knife off between butter servings? :/

Libra: When people scrape their teeth against the silverware while taking a bite. That shit makes them cringe!

Scorpio: Porn clips where the audio is slightly delayed.

Sagittarius: When people don’t say good bye before hanging up the phone. Like WTF?!

Capricorn: Wet bathrooms, especially when they walk in wearing socks. How the FUCK did you manage to turn a goddamn little linoleum box of a room into a freaking swamp?

Aquarius: They hate when people try to tell them things they already know.

Pisces People who put cereal or milk back with only a tiny bit left. UGH. Whyyyy?!!!

Why The Signs Are In Prison

Aries- Murdering the president
Taurus- car chase
Gemini- stealing jewelry
Cancer- being acused of murder
Leo- having GIANTIC fields of weed in their backyard
Virgo- not paying taxes
Libra- stealing a child
Scorpio- doing drugs
Sagittarius- killing Santa
Capricorn- exploding a bridge
Aquarius- buying weed from leo
Pisces- assaulting a officer

What Your Sign is Doing Right Now

Aries: On Tumblr

Taurus: On Tumblr

Gemini: On Tumblr

Cancer: On Tumblr

Leo: On Tumblr

Virgo: On Tumblr

Libra: On Tumblr

Scorpio: On Tumblr

Sagittarius: On Tumblr

Capricorn: On Tumblr

Aquarius: On Tumblr

Pisces: On Tumblr