these two are actually going to kill me one day

Ok Baras’ plan would never have worked because I just read the codex and it says no matter who the vessel is, be it a young woman or an old man, the Voice sounds the same. And some of the Dark Council members have spoken to the Voice sooooooooo….

Baras: Hey guys, I’m the new Emperor’s Voice!

Marr: Baras, we know it’s you.

Baras, trying to make his voice sound more gruffHeeyyyyy guyyyyssss, it’s really me, the Emperor’s Voice!

Ravage: No, see, I’ve spoken with the Voice and that voice doesn’t make me want to shove my own cock through my skull the way yours does.

Marr: Whoa! What the fuck, Ravage?

Baras: I WILL NOT BE SPOKEN TO LIKE THIS! I DEMAND OBEDIENCE! ‘TIS I! YOUR EMPEROR!

Ravage: See?

Nox: Shit, let me kill him. Two Darths in one day. I bet that’d be a new record!

Mortis: NO YOU WILL FUCKING NOT, NOX! I JUST HAD THIS ROOM CLEANED!

Marr: Actually, the Emperor killed like thousands of Sith Lords simultaneously back in the day.

Nox: Impressive!

Mortis: Dammit. I see a spot was missed. What the hell is that? Is that….part of Thanaton’s ear?!

Baras: I WILL NOT BE DENIED!! 

Vowrawn: *collapsed on the floor, dying of laughter*

Ravage: If Baras doesn’t die in the next 15 seconds, y'all are gonna see something beyond horrific; my dick going through my own eye socket.

Marr: Please, somebody do something!!!

Nox: I’d pay to see that, Ravage.

Wrath: I’ll handle this.

Baras: NOoOOooOOOOOOOoOOOO!

Mortis, walking over to the “Days Since Our Last Nonsense” board to change it to zero seeing it already says zero: Just once I’d like this number higher than 1.

Nox: This was fun! I’m glad I joined the Council. Thanks, guys.

Garrett and Marian - Legacy Banters
  • Marian: Well... not quite how I imagined this family reunion going. I was envisioning more hugs and maybe some wine over dinner. Not attempted assassinations
  • Carver: Really? You think this is so abnormal for our family?
  • Marian: Well you got me there
  • ---
  • Bethany: What could our father have to do with this mess? The Carta have had more than enough time to try and find us
  • Garrett: I imagine that having two Champions of Kirkwall with the last name Hawke may have tipped them off
  • Bethany: But it's been three years since you and sis defeated the Arishok. Why wait that long?
  • Marian: Well I don't know about you, but if I was going to go after the people who killed an Arishok then I'd probably want to make a little time for planning, wouldn't you?
  • Carver: Do these morons strike you as the sensible type?
  • Marian: Two points in one day Carver? Don't tell me the Templars are actually drilling some wit into that skull of yours
  • Carver: *laughs* At least /my/ wit makes a point, dear sister
  • Bethany: Ooh, that had to hurt
  • Garrett: Do you need some healing for that one, Marian?
  • Marian: Oh shove off, all of you
  • ---
  • Garrett: And we're back in the Deep Roads
  • Marian: Oh it's not that bad. I mean... Look at all the... Ugh, no, you're right this is terrible. Let's all promise never to go to the Deep Roads after this. Three times is enough
  • Garrett: Three times? When was the second?
  • Marian: Um... well...
  • Carver and Bethany: *sing song voices* Somebody's in trouble
  • ---
  • Bethany: Varric wrote to me the other day
  • Garrett: Telling another of his stories, I bet. Was it the one about the high dragon, because that didn't really-
  • Bethany: No. He was giving me an update. On you, actually. I was... worried, so I wrote to him and asked
  • Garrett: I'm fine Beth. Really
  • Bethany: No you're not. Not yet. But I know you, and if anyone can get past it, you can
  • Garrett: Thank you
  • ---
  • Carver: You might want to be watch yourself, Garrett
  • Garrett: How come?
  • Carver: Ever since you sided with Orsino the other day, there's been... Rumours. Meredith isn't happy with you, and it's only because she allows it that you're still free
  • Garrett: So is she going to have me dragged to the Circle, or is she getting the Brand ready now?
  • Fenris: Don't say that
  • Carver: I would never let it get that far. But I thought I'd warn you, just in case you were thinking about making her mad
  • Garrett: I appreciate you telling me Carver. Don't worry. I'll be careful
  • ---
  • *after completing Malcolm's Will*
  • Marian: So... the stonework down here is... lovely, isn't it?
  • Carver: Not now, Mary
  • Marian: I was only... Alright
  • ---
  • Marian: Are you okay, Gary?
  • Garrett: I'm fine... Just...
  • Marian: He loved you. And Bethany. He'd be so proud of you
  • Garrett: You sound so sure of that
  • Marian: Of course I am. Because it's true. And don't let that nasty shit in your head tell you otherwise - it's a liar, remember
  • Garrett: *chuckles* Alright
  • Bethany: Be careful sister, people might think you've got a heart after all
  • Marian: *dramatically* Oh no! *clutches chest* I think... I think I'm getting feelings! Quick, someone beat them out of me!
  • Carver: *laughs* You be careful what you wish for sister
  • Isabela: I'd rather ride them out of you
  • Garrett: Ah, and there's the dirty line. I was starting to worry something was wrong Bela
  • Isabela: And you're as sweet as ever, Garrett
  • ---
  • Varric: Twenty silvers, that's my final offer. Take it or leave it Elf
  • Marian: What are you betting on, and why am I getting left out of it?
  • Varric: You want in? We're betting on what it'll take to get Junior and Waffles to hug
  • Garrett: *groans* You're not calling me 'Waffles' again, are you?
  • Varric: I have to. Every time I say 'Hawke' all four of you turn around. I'm being considerate
  • Carver: I bet there's /someone/ here who'd like to see him covered in syrup
  • Garrett: Carver!
  • Fenris: *embarrassed noises*
  • Isabela: Ooh, new friend-fiction idea!
  • Garrett: Don't you even dare!
  • Isabela: Too late, already dared. Can we make camp? I need to make notes
  • ---
  • Varric: Hey, Rivaini, I'm expecting royalties if that friend-fiction of yours gets published
  • Carver: When you didn't even come up with it?
  • Varric: You wouldn't have brought up syrup if I didn't call him Waffles
  • Garrett: Maker save me...
  • Bethany: And me...
  • Marian: Usually I like dirty things... But this is too far, even for me
  • Isabela: Are you saying you wouldn't like it if /I/ were covered in syrup?
  • Marian: Oh I'm sorry. I didn't realise you were my very hairy twin brother, Bela
  • Isabela: Well when you put it that way...
  • ---
  • Isabela: I always thought we were the loud ones, you know
  • Fenris: What?
  • Marian: I know right. Maybe they're just less shy about it now
  • Garrett: Do I want to know?
  • Isabela: You already know. Or did you deafen yourself?
  • Marian: To think, they don't need us shouting encouragement through the wall anymore. I'm so proud
  • Isabela: Our boys are growing up so fast. Maybe next they'll master foreplay
  • Carver: Oh Maker, I do not want to hear this
  • Bethany: Neither do I
  • Garrett: *loudly* And I would be very happy if we could stop talking about this. Right now
  • Isabela: Yeah, see. That kind of loud
  • Fenris: *deadpan* If you're so fascinated by Garrett being loud, then you must not be doing a very good job at making Marian scream, Isabela
  • Marian: Oooooooo
  • Isabela: Oh, you snarky little shit
  • Bethany: *loudly* If we could stop discussing my older brother's and sister's sex lives, I would appreciate it
  • Carver: *loudly* Oh look, more darkspawn. Let's kill them so we can stop talking about this
  • ---
  • Marian: So our choices are the nice, Tainted madman, or the mage who wants to let a darkspawn magister out of his hole in the ground? Why can we never make nice decisions, like what kind of wine to have with dinner?
  • Fenris: I agree. It is the only decision worth making
  • Marian: When you're not throwing it at the walls, I assume?
  • Fenris: That was six years ago
  • Marian: And you never offered me a glass
  • Fenris: You are recycling jokes now? Has the great Marian Hawke's wit finally lost it's edge?
  • Marian: Ooh, you are just asking for it now
  • ---
  • Varric: You okay Garrett? You've been a bit quiet since-
  • Garrett: I'm fine Varric. There's more important things to be worried about right now
  • Varric: It's not easy to realise that someone you looked up to wasn't quite what you imagined. You ever need to talk, you know where my suite is
  • ---
  • Isabela: So... is no one going to bring up the fact that Varric called Garrett by his name earlier?
  • Varric: What are you talking about Rivaini? Waffles and I were just having a friendly chat
  • Isabela: Don't bullshit me. You called him Garrett. I heard you
  • Varric: That doesn't sound like me, Rivaini
  • Marian: He called you by your name when Velasco carted you off to Castillon
  • Isabela: What?! No fair, I didn't get to hear!
  • ---
  • Bethany: Are you sure about this, brother?
  • Garrett: It has to be done
  • Bethany: I could do it. I am a Hawke after all, and a mage. You don't need to-
  • Garrett: No, Bethany
  • Bethany: But-!
  • Garrett: Bethy, if I let you use blood magic, I'd never be able to live with myself
  • Bethany: And if you do it, will you be able to live with it?
  • Garrett: I'd rather it be me than you
  • ---
  • Varric: If he pulls a dragon out of his ass, I'm leaving!
  • Marian: Oh great, and now he's almost certain to pull a dragon out of his arse! Way to go Varric
  • ---
  • Bethany: Here, you didn't get a chance to close that wound earlier
  • Garrett: Thank you
  • Fenris: I just hope it was worth it
  • Marian: Well we /did/ just kill a darkspawn magister. I can't wait to hear how Varric tells this one
  • Varric: Well I doubt I'll have to exaggerate a damn thing, considering how weird this shit is
  • Fenris: That isn't what I meant...
  • Garrett: I'd have avoided it if I could, but someone had to. And if it meant sparing my little sister from that...
  • Fenris: I understand. But... Please, just be more careful from now on
  • Garrett: I will, I promise
  • Isabela: You two are so sappy... It's actually rather cute
EXO CHANYEOL AS YOUR BOYFRIEND

~Bullet Points~


  • Now Chanyeol is the biggest ball of fluff, this is just a fact
  • He’d be the type of boyfriend that wants you to know that he loves you with every bit of his heart
  • Meaning he’d be super affectionate, will give you small gifts with notes attached to them saying things like ‘To the best girlfriend in the world, I love you’ or ‘My beautiful girl who ,means everything to me’
  • He’s just super cheesy and cute aight guys, show the bean a lot of love
  • The type of guy to send cheesy pick up lines to you when he has spare time in the day 
  • ‘Y/N, roses are red, violets are blue, out of all the girls in the world, I just want you.’
  • Yes he tries to be original and thinks of these pick up lines himself, tbh idk if that’s better or worse
  • Would also send you good morning and goodnight messages cuz he’s cute like that
  • Constantly checks you’ve eaten or if you’re ill
  • If you are ill he’ll be with you straight away with everything you would need 
  • Practically like Suho except when you ask him to cuddle, he won’t think and would happily snuggle next to you if it makes you feel better
  • Ends up getting sick as well
  • Now both of you are ill and would resort to mother Suho coming to the rescue again (struggles of having 8 children to care for, 9 actually if we include you)
  • Once the both of you are better he’ll take you out for a meal as he feels bad that he couldn’t be the one to look after you and got his dumbass ill as well
  • Most likely would take you to a cute cafe afterwards just so he can sit in a booth with you and cuddle you
  • Worries about your feelings for him a lot, he can be really sensitive at times and has a tendency to over think a small situation
  • If you hadn’t spoken to him all day he’d start to see this as a sign that you don’t love him anymore 
  • Therefore resulting in him turning up at your house with flowers in hand, only to then remember that the day before you had said you would be at work the whole day and won’t be able to talk
  • Poor bean over though everything and forgot, please love this fluffball
  • You barely argue at all, he could never get mad at you and lets face it, it’d be really hard to get mad at him
  • But when you do argue, it ends with both of you crying 
  • You probably cried first and seeing you upset and crying definitely tipped him over the edge
  • He’d start apologising and telling you how much he loves you, even though the argument may not of been because of him but because of you
  • Yall both start crying even more in each others arms and saying you love each other and you shouldn’t argue again 
  • He then become really tender, wiping tears away from your face, tucking strands of hair behind your ear, smiling at you and looking at you in pure admiration. Probably does a little bit of aegyo knowing this kid
  • But then after he acts all cute and makes your heart flutter, sexy mode activate
  • He’d pull you into his lap and look you up and down and lick his lips in the most sexy way possible oml
  • Your hearteu, haha bye bye your life your dead he just gone did murder you
  • His eyes fixate onto your lips and he’s smirking the whole time, that damn smirk that makes you want to punch him in the face for being so sexy yet still you would sell your soul to the devil just to see that smirk again
  • You see where this is going, yall make out, he stands up with your legs wrapped around his waist, next thing you know you’re being thrown onto the bed and…..
  • He can be such a total, flustered bean but god he would know how to use his hips
  • Yours two relationship is just so cute, you would always be clinging onto eachother and love eachothers presence
  • The best

Originally posted by moon-min-ah


Fudge I was waiting for this day to come, oh Chanyeol, mu ultimate bias in EXO, what have you done to me? I actually love him so much.

Anyways I hope you all enjoyed this scenario, this one actually killed me. Requests are open and I’ll post guidelines soon and they’ll be in my bio! I love you all my beautiful followers!

Until next time, byeeeee~

-Admin stroni

Sehun as Older Brother Headcanon
  1. Fun all the time, you’ll never be bored
  2. You’d go with him to your first party; he’d teach you how to drive
  3. He’d even teach you how to flirt xD
  4. “Just because you know how, doesn’t mean you can bring a guy home. I’ll kill him”
  5. He’ll have so many chocolates in his room and notice if you go and take one without his permission and probably will make you buy him another one 
  6. He’d defend you like you were Vivi
  7. “Come on… it’s not that late.. it’s two am. Let’s go to the park and play with Vivi!”
  8. He’d actually be very shy and awkward around your friends
  9. He’d be there for every important even you have
  10. “It’s been a while since we had a day just for ourselves, wanna go to eat something nice and play video games later?”
  11. He’d share with you those chocolates he keeps hidden in his room when you are sad and lonely
  12. “Tell me who and I’ll kill him/her. No one makes my baby cry like this”
  13. He’d be very loud all the time, probably compete with you to see who’s louder
  14. “Fine, you can use my car… but if I smell a boy’s cologne inside, I’ll make him clean it!”
  15. Pranks all the time
  16. Every time he can he’d call you to hang out with him and Chanyeol
  17. “You know Y/N, I never tell you this but.. I’m really proud of you”
  18. He’d trust you with Vivi’s life
  19. “Do you think she likes me? I don’t know what to do.. what do you say?”
  20. He’d end up doing your house chores because little sis complex xD

anonymous asked:

If Hisana was reborn as Ichigo's sister instead of Rukia's, how would Ichigo think of her? His smartest, but also scariest little sister who loves to nitpick their dad's work at the clinic? Would Hisana attack Byakuya at first sight when they meet during the invasion, due to him hurting both Ichigo & Rukia?

A short summary of why Kurosaki Shion, the youngest child of the Kurosaki family, is a very, very weird child:

-Came into the world screaming her head off. Which, pretty normal for a Kurosaki child. Refused to make a sound for the next twelve months. Not so normal.

-After 12 months of complete silence, suddenly started talking in complete sentences.

-Her first birthday, Isshin secretly took her to see Urahara (as he’d done with all of his children). Coincidentally, that was when she spoke her first words, which were ‘uh oh.’ 

-Masaki caught her flipping through an English-Japanese dictionary a few months later. She decided not to mention it.

-Ichigo caught her with one of their father’s medical textbooks a few weeks later. He just thought it was cool. 

-Things started really getting weird around her 2nd birthday, when she decided her new favorite toy was a large glass bottle filled with water. “Do you think it’s a little concerning that our daughter has imprinted on a glass bottle instead of, say, a stuffed animal?” “Nah.” 

-As it turned out, that bottle came in handy a couple months later one fateful afternoon, when she lit it on fire and chucked the entire thing at the hollow attacking her mother and brother. Hint: it was not filled with water.

-It wasn’t enough to save her mother’s life and she never quite forgave herself for that. Even so, all four Kurosaki children started carrying around glass bottles filled with ‘water.’ It led to many awkward parent-teacher conferences for Isshin.

-Her third birthday, she marched up to Urahara’s shop and demanded he train her. It was the start of a very interesting relationship.

-Flash forward a few years: “I’m going with you.” “No you’re not you’re like eight and the size of one of Karin’s soccer balls. Like hell you’re going.” “You need me.” “You ain’t going and that’s final.” “Nii-san I’ll stop arguing with you right now if you can name how many captains there are in the Seireitei.” “…” “That’s what I thought now shut up I’m coming.”

-Ironically enough, out of all the people who invaded the Seireitei that day, she actually made it the furthest due to two things: 1. Although the vast majority of shinigami are dicks, most of them are not the sort of dicks who’d try to kill an eight year old human girl and 2. Because she actually did some research beforehand, she realized no one actually gave a shit about 4th Division members. And so, logically, she stole one of their uniforms and utilized its mysterious invisibility-granting powers to sneak around the Seireitei. She managed to get within like 10 feet of where Rukia was held before she had the misfortune to run into freaking Unohana of all people (pro tip: pretending to be a 4th Division member does not actually work against the captain of the 4th Division)

-Made things slightly more complicated for Ichigo during his fight with Byakuya. “You’re supporting the execution of your sister? What kind of monster are you?! Don’t you know that big brothers are supposed to protect their little sisters?” “…you brought your eight year old little sister with you on a suicidal mission to the afterlife.” “About that…”

anonymous asked:

Someone should have smashed Jesus's head in with a rock when he was still a baby.

You’re not the first to suggest that. Jesus actually narrowly escaped being stoned by the Pharisees (John 8), and if we go back to shortly after His birth, we will see that Herod wanted Jesus eliminated so badly that he decreed all male children near Bethlehem under the age of two be killed (Matthew 2:16).

Moral of the story: That which God wills will always prevail

John 6:38, “For I have come down from heaven, not to do My own will, but the will of Him who sent Me.”

And that will was to die an innocent death on a cross for the sins of those who would one day believe.

And now for a word out of the other side of me ol' arse.....

Do I think we got a big fuck you last night from Outlander pimp master Samwise and his bff coworker K-trina?

Yes.

Do I think they are assholes?

No.

Do I think they are jackasses?

Yes.

Do I think they loathe fans?

As a collective entity that qualifies as a necessary evil work albatross, yes. Individually as human beings, no.

Do they appreciate that the collective entity has elevated their status from workaday nobodies to beloved and successful and entertainingly useful notables?

Yes.

Do they appreciate that a few of the individuals have fucktarded all over the fandom that built Outlander and made us ~and them~ look like and occasionally act like ungrateful idiotic brainless trolls from Mars?

No. Fuck no. And to those individuals, they say fuck off. 🖕🏻

So says the other, more rational side of me ol’ arse. If you prefer the side of me ol’ arse that had the podium earlier, that’s fine. Both cheeks reside amicably side by side on the body that houses the brain they share. (No, I’m not drunk)

They are flawed. We are flawed. Lies and half truths are coming from every which way and nobody on either side really has any idea what the hell is actually going on and the chaos that has resulted is what has me in a funk as of late.

This is supposed to be the easy part of life. The non life threatening or potentially bankruptive activity that gets one through the horseshit that might kill you one day.

Anyway…..

I’m not jumping back in the sheeple parade of mindless social media minions. I’ll watch with squinty eyes of distrust from my porch covered in soggy waffles and see how I feel in September.

Now would be a great time for the two blessed outlander jackasses to just start being themselves ALL THE TIME, especially on SM. That’s just a suggestion. In case they happen to follow the scent of latest fart in the Tumblr wind. 💨

Part 6 - Breakfast At Tiffany’s

“baby please, baby please no promises…”


When people would mention the state of depression you could fall into after a breakup, I had never really understood what they meant. Not entirely. I didn’t understand the waves of sadness and melancholy that would hit at the most random times, the lack of appetite and energy, not even wanting to get out of bed or get dressed. I didn’t understand not wanting to see a single person or step foot outside into the fresh air. I didn’t understand how a person could let themselves get that involved; get that immersed in the feelings rupturing inside them that they literally couldn’t care about anything, especially themselves, anymore. Putting their bodies and minds at the hands of such sorrow and pity that nothing else in the entire world mattered except sleeping the day away to let their thoughts finally be void of whoever and whatever was causing such distress.

I didn’t understand any of that until it happened to me.

Keep reading

You and Peter and having a crush on each other would include...
  • Being best friends, of course, who doesn’t love a good best friends to lovers cliché
  • BEING OBLIVIOUS
  • Quick little glances at each other when the other isn’t paying attention
  • Him getting super *heart eyes* when you talk to him about something you’re passionate about
  • Him just wanting to grab your face aND KISS YOU
  • Studying at his place
  • Him getting super tired from all the work and you just admire his cute little yawn
  • But then he stretches and his shirt rises up a bit aNd teEN hOrMonEs
  • Him catching you
  • BLUSHING
  • Stealing his sweaters
  • “Ugh, I swear half of my wardrobe is in your possession.”
  • But he secretly loves it
  • Finding out about Spider-Man and realizing how much you truly care about him and don’t want him to get hurt
  • Him showing up in the middle of the night just because he wants to talk
  • And boy does he have stories
  • He gets so excited when he tells you cool things that’s happened while he was Spidey and you just love every second of it
  • But also, taking care of his wounds
  • Movie nights
  • Lying on opposite sides of the couch
  • But as the night drags on, you slowly get closer to each other
  • “Peter, I’ve ran out of soda.”
  • *shoots web towards kitchen*
  • “Thanks.”
  • Passionate duets to Disney songs
  • Peter nailing every line and you being Shook™
  • Aunt May knowing about Peter’s crush and lowkey hinting it at you but you’re still oblivious
  • Ned being around for all of it
  • One day, you accidentally spill the beans to him
  • “Well, no shit, it’s kind of obvious??”
  • Well Fuck™
  • He promises he won’t tell
  • But turns out he’s the reason that you two end up telling each other your feelings
  • He just casually brings it up by accident
  • “Yeah, I think I have a crush on this girl but it’s nothing like the crush Y/N has on you so- OH MY GOD.”
  • PETER FREAKING OUT
  • “Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. She likes me?????? WHat????”
  • “She’s going to kill me.”
  • You don’t actually kill Ned… but you don’t talk to him for days
  • Lowkey being really grateful that Ned spilled because you’re together now and everything is so great
  • Although Peter is the superhero, Ned’s the one who saved the day in this situation.
Two Bit’s Secrets

Sometimes I can’t help but wonder why Two Bit acts the way he does, but I can’t help but make some theories. 

Just imagine 

- Two Bit doesn’t just drink for the kicks, but because the throbbing in his head gives him a distraction from any mental pain he might be feeling

- He’s always trying to be laughing even when times are tough, because he wants to be the beacon of hope that he never had

- (This one is based on the fact that Pony never mentioned Two’s father in the book, which leads me to believe he walked out) What if Two Bit isn’t just protective of Johnny because everyone else is, but because he wants to be there for him like a father, which he never truly had?

- What if another reason he always carries a switch blade is because deep down, he feels scared that one day a Soc just might try and kill him?

- What if Two Bit actually has real fucking emotions besides being happy and humorous all the time like any other human being? What if there’s just more to his character than the “happy go lucky guy” we always seem to see?

Originally posted by chrisnolanfilms

Prompt:  Hi! I love your writing. Can you make a Kirk x reader where the reader is a huge prankster and just keeps on making Jim annoyed but he secretely likes it? Include the crew too please! Thank you so much!
Word Count: 1019
Warnings:
Author’s Note: This is really just an excuse to use this gif….

Keep reading

British Tea Party

Title: British Tea Party

Character: Crowley, Rowena  ||  Pairing: Crowley x demon!Reader

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: ~1k

Prompt: “Brits are the best.” “I know, that’s why I’m possessing one.”

Summary: Family afternoon tea with Crowley and his mother always make for an entertaining hour.

A/n: This is for @bloodstained-porcelain-doll ‘s challenge! I loved getting a personalised prompt about our shared love of British awesomeness, thanks for hosting the awesome challenge! Also everyone reading this, please forgive me if my Rowena isn’t perfect, I’m only on season nine so it was mostly improvising (but I loved the idea way too much to not write it). ENJOY <3


“Fergus” Rowena sounded exactly like she always did when talking to her son, in a know-it-all manner and with a not so subtle bitchiness to it, “Why is it that your ‘girlfriend’ sounds more Scottish than you do? Is someone ashamed of where he comes from, dear?”

You quickly took a sip of your tea to hide the smile about to spread on your face. Tea parties with Crowley and his mother always tended to end in discussion, though this one seemed like an entirely new one. Usually it was more of an if-I-were-to-rule-hell-I-would from Rowena’s side while your king stuck more to the how-to-British-polite-threaten-your-annoying-mother kinda small talk. Needless to say you were the only one that got to enjoy those afternoons.

Keep reading

Not Gonna Make It

I remember when weekends used to be a welcome break from the work week. Now they are hellacious. Non-stop supervision. Someone needs to be next DS nearly every moment that he’s awake anticipating his next meltdown and how to prevent it. He’s been on edge all weekend. His therapist recommended yesterday we give notice on RK.

RK has a history of targeting one child in the home and very manipulatively attacking him or her (mentally and emotionally, not physically). Unfortunately in our home, she’s chosen DS. He’s not up to the challenge. She’s super sneaky about it. Today they were taking turns on the trampoline. One person got ten minutes of jumping time and the other got to run the timer (on an old iPhone) and be in charge of choosing the music. She was shorting him by five minutes. DH figured it out when he set a timer for nine minutes so he could give DS a one minute warning. RK said they needed to switch and DS actually still had several minutes left. DH revoked RK’s trampoline privileges for the rest of the day and tomorrow.

This was today. Yesterday they got into it and RK and DS came into the house together. RK cursed DS out and told us, “Just believe him. That’s what you do every time.” “Give me a knife. I’ll just go kill myself.” “I want to leave. If you don’t let me leave, I’m going to make your lives miserable for the next two days.” On and on she goes. DS cannot handle it. He is barley treading water these days. I have no idea why he’s so on edge, but he is and it makes DH and I feel super stressed.

His therapist is chalking it up to trauma in utero as well as foster care trauma. He is about as best case scenario for foster care as it gets. Placed at 29 days of age. Adopted before age three. No change of placements (he was placed with me and adopted by me). Visits were always supervised. And yet, he is SO, SO angry. There is a history of mental health diagnoses (unknown to us) and AODA issues. DS seems to hate himself and is definitely over emotional. He feels things acutely and has a great deal of difficulty calming down. He is becoming more physical with both me and DH. I’m chalking this up to intense emotional feelings and possibly puberty. He’ll turn 11 this summer. His adoption anniversary is today. I don’t know if that is churning stuff up for him or not. Once school is out for me I’m going to work on his lifebook. We talk about his story but I’m hoping that having it written down where he can access it any time he wants will be helpful. I feel bad for RK but I don’t know what else to do. She has the upper hand here. DS is highly reactive which is why I think she targets him. She’s pretty good at intentionally provoking him and then walking away when he reacts acting like she didn’t do anything wrong. She’s such a great kid in so many ways but is it okay for me to sacrifice DS’ well being for hers? That’s what it feels like we are doing. Foster care. The longer I do this, the less confident I feel about my role in it.
June 2017 RVB Rec Day

I’ve been reading a lot of RVB fic lately for some reason, and since it’s RVB rec day I figured that I might as well go ahead and throw some out there for you guys to pick up if that tickles your fancy.

The real thing that I’ve learned about myself is that I am all about York and Tex being good friends and working together. I just need more of it in my life as a general thing. Anywho, on to the recs.

The Ghosts that Linger and The Ghost and Mrs. Muir by @meteoratdusk

So this… isn’t technically one recommendation, but I feel the need to recommend both of these works together anyways. So this series. This series. This is not for the faint of heart, but it’s also utterly fantastic. I made the brilliant decision to read both fics when it was two in the morning and I was tired, and I have very rarely run into horror fics that have had any sort of actual impact on me. I jumped when my cat came into my room. I was having sympathy pain from one particular scene for a solid two days after reading The Ghosts That Linger.

But these fics are bingeable in the best way. You don’t necessarily need The Ghosts That Linger to understand what’s going on in The Ghost and Mrs. Muir, but I would highly recommend reading both. The character relationships are really what made the fics for me, and everyone feels wonderfully in character, even when things aren’t going so well.

Horror might not be everyone’s cup of tea, but MeteorAtDusk absolutely kills it with every word.

The Long Road Home by @scribbleboxfox

You like nice art? Locus? Redemption fics? Evil AI? Don’t mind reading a WIP? Then this is definitely for you. There’s a lot of mystery floating around the story so far, and it’s absolutely wonderful. I have absolutely no idea where this story is going at this point, and I love it. Every chapter has great art in it, and really, I can’t stress that enough. Scribbleboxfox’s art is gorgeous.

Every chapter is something that I sincerely look forward to, and if you think that this sort of thing is your cup of tea, definitely give it a read.

The BFF verse by @secretlystephaniebrown

When I first decided that I wanted to rec something from this series, I had a ridiculously hard time figure out the best way to do it. After fighting with it for a while, I decided that the best way to deal with it was to just recommend the entire series. Premise is simple enough: Wyoming related Time Travel Shenanigans give Tex a chance to get York to Blood Gulch. There are friendships, relationships (Suckington!,) and some damn satisfying reunion scenes.

Time’s Running Out, the latest fic in the series is still a work in progress, but I am anxiously awaiting the next chapter to see where this universe goes and to see how the various relationships and friendships continue to develop. And with the framing and story all based on Chorus? It’s definitely worth seeing where it all goes. 

Grand Theft Washington by @akisawana

Nobody went back for Wash. That’s been one of the gripes of the century, why did nobody go back for Wash? Why not York? or Tex? Well, this fic attempts to answer that question, and it’s wonderful every step of the way. The relationships are what really sell the story for me, action aside. I’ve never seen a more sympathetic Omega anywhere, and the relationships between the two Human/AI pairs are perfect, with every little bit in character.

This story also has some really lovely moments of quiet and intimacy between friends, or between man and AI. You really get the feeling that these are people that do deeply care for each other the entire way through. Also the ending? It hurts. It’ll break your heart.

Can’t recommend this one highly enough, really!

Bye, Tinkerbell - Alex McDonald imagine

My first request, yay! I have two more in my ask right now, I’ll get to them tomorrow. Also, I know my blog is supposed to be just about Jack and Conor, but I just really like Alex, too. So like, don’t kill me or anything. 

Plus I wasn’t sure if Alex’s dad is actually called Duncan, some one who knows please tell me if I’m right or not.


Request: “Anonymous said:Can you write Alex McDonald one where you’re childhood friends/your mom and his mom are friends and they try to get you and Alex together and it’s very awkward but still so fluffy and cute yaknowww”


Part Two

MASTERLIST



Keep reading

Imagine being a stone cold bitch before meeting Tom
  • You are famous and you have that Rhianna complex thing going on where you don’t give a fuck
  • You are known as the queen of resting bitch face
  • You aren’t mean but you can be if someone irritates you
  • You got a role for a movie and Tom is your co-star
  • You look him up and down and barely say hi
  • He is intimidated by you but thinks you’re beautiful
  • “Do you want to go out to dinner with us, Y/N?” He asks, feeling his voice shaky

“No.”

  • “Okay, but let me know if you change your mind. We leave in an hour.” He says closing your trailer door. 
  • You really not wanting to go but you have a small crush on Tom
  • “Is that a smile?” Tom teases. “Nope.” You said going back to your RBF
  • After a few months of knowing him, he is the only one who can make you laugh.
  • “You’re very beautiful Y/N.” He says one day while you two hang out in your trailer. 
  • “Oh shove it Holland.” You giggle.
  • “No I’m being serious. At first you scared the hell out me, but you are just a big softie.”
  • You laugh, “Don’t tell anyone or I’ll have to kill you.”
  • “I believe you.” He jokes. 
  • “Can I kiss you/” He asks leaning in. 

“Um excuse you?”

  • “I’m sorry, I didn’t-” He sighed
  • You smile and lean in to kiss him. “Not bad.” You smile
  • “Not bad at all, actually.” He smiles going in for more. 
Got7 date series!

Because I had time tonight, I wrote the Bambam fic! This is the sixth installment in the series! Enjoy!

Bambam

           “Bams, will you take me shopping? All my other friends have been busy every time I want to hang out lately, and I doubt my mom wants to go.” You stuck out your lip just a little as he thought it over.

           “Well, I’m not doing anything on Saturday, if you wanna go then.” He glanced at you briefly from his place on the couch in your living room with the xbox controller in his hand.

           “Okay, are you sure? I’m planning to make a day out of it. I need tons of new clothes—everything in my closet is either old and full of holes or old and too small.” You smiled, just a tad sheepish.

           “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be? Clothes shopping with my favorite girl sounds pretty fun to me, actually. He smiled while he kept his eyes on the screen, killing a zombie with a knife through its skull. “And besides, we’ve hardly seen each other in the last week anyway. Of course, I’ll take you shopping.”

           You smiled to yourself. He’s the best, you thought.

           You and Bambam had been best friends for two years now, and you’d always kind of had a crush on him, but you’d never tell him that. He was the only one who understood what was going on in your head at any given second of the day. You’d go out in public holding hands sometimes, and when people asked if you were a couple, you’d both scrunch your noses up and jump away from each other, then go right back to holding hands once they left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Saturday

           “Y/N?” Bambam had let himself in the house. You’d left it unlocked anyway, hoping he’d show even though you’d told him you didn’t want to go. He thudded his way up the stairs and tapped softly on your bedroom door. “Y/N, I know you’re in there.” He opened the door to you lying face-down on your bed, arms and legs spread in what is fondly known as the starfish position.

           He sank down on the edge of the bed, and you grunted in acknowledgement. “What’s wrong, dude?” You grunted again, not lifting your head or moving from your spot. “Come on, Y/N. Really. What’s wrong?” His hand moved to stroke your hair and lifted the curtain of it from your face, forcing you to look at him. “I know that grunt. But what I don’t know is what’s wrong, and as your best friend, it’s my job to know. Now tell me, dammit.”

           You groaned and rolled over onto your back, staying silent.

           “Alright, you brought this on yourself.” He pressed himself into your side, bony elbow resting right under your ribcage so you were just uncomfortable enough to be annoyed, but not to be hurt, and began poking you in the face with his index finger until you sighed and gave in.

            “I’m so fucking anxious. I’m on my period, and that always seems to make it worse, not to mention that I’m bloated and I feel awful about myself right now.” You sighed and Bambam pulled you in close to him. His hand stroked from the top of your hair to right in the middle of your shoulder blades. “It’s okay if you don’t want to go out today, babe, but I feel like you could do with getting out of the house and out of your head for a little bit.”

           “You know, it probably would help to go out. Maybe we should.” You sighed again and he pulled you closer.

           “There’s my girl.” He boosted your mood with those three words, and he let you lie in his arms until you were sure you were ready, his hand never leaving your back.

           Once you got up, he helped you pick your outfit, waited for you to do your hair and makeup because he knew this trip was all about making you feel better, and held the door for you as you left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           “Y/N, I really love these pants. Do you wanna try them?” He held up a pair of skinny jeans that were your size, your exact style, and within your price range.

           “God, why did I ever go shopping with anyone besides you before this?” Your cart was full of clothes that you and Bambam had picked out, most of them fall/winter clothes, with a few hats and tanks thrown in.

           He grinned. “I dunno, must’ve been a former character flaw.” He giggled and got distracted by a pair of wedges that were screaming your name. “Oh my god, did you see these?”

           “I was gonna pick them up if you didn’t.” You beamed and tried them on, walked around for a few minutes and—deciding you liked them, threw them into the cart with all your other stuff.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Everything you’d tried on, Bambam had absolutely loved. He freaked out when you threw on the heels, skinny jeans, and an oversized sweater, over-exaggerating his jaw drop just to make you smile and laugh. He wolf whistled when you put on the striped beanie, and truly made you feel like a princess while you’d been out. He was ever the gentleman, insisting that he held all the bags, even though you were pretty positive you could’ve gotten them yourself.

           His hand slipped into yours while he was driving, and he kissed it, still keeping his eyes on the road. You flushed a light pink and he finally spoke after a solid five minutes of silence. “Today made me realize something about our relationship.”

           Your heart raced and your breath hitched, but your hand didn’t leave his. “What was that?”

           He looked at you briefly before turning his eyes back to the road, took a deep, cleansing breath, and continued. “I just feel like you and I belong together.” His thumb was rubbing circles into the hand that was clutching his. “I mean, think about it. Who else has been able to calm you down like I have? Who else has been there to hear everything you think, even when it’s late and we both need our rest? Who the fuck else has been here to put up with me and every harebrained idea and poorly executed attempt to put it into action? I think it’s obvious that you and I have something.” He glanced at you and pulled over, the look on his face so intense and sincere that you were scared.

           “Bams,” you began, “I’ve felt like that since the second I met you. Since the minute our eyes met for the first time, I knew you were going to mean something to me, and it turned out to be more than just my best friend. I am so, so in love with you.”

           His hand left yours and found your hair, tangling itself in the strands as he leaned in close, and his mouth found yours effortlessly. His lips were soft and he tasted like orange creamsicles, vanilla and citrus blending together as his tongue slid into your mouth and mapped the terrain like he was trying to memorize it. He kissed a trail down your neck and let you catch your breath, then came back for a second round. You smiled against his lips. “I’m so glad you feel the same,” he breathed. You had me worried there for a second.” He kissed you again as you shook your head.

           “There’s no need to worry. I’ll always be here. Always.”

Oh don’t mind me. Just going through my favourite OUAT pairing tag and being upset the writers killed off one of the best characters of the show while also panicking about 2 assignments due in a day.

Let’s Make You a Pro.

Title: Let’s Make You a Pro.

Characters: Sam x Reader, Dean.

Summary: The reader got hurt on a hunt which she went alone. Sam doesn’t take it so well.

Word Count: 1090

Warnings: Angst.

A/N: I don’t know… Let me know what you think!

Your name: submit What is this?

_____

You got out of the car, putting pressure in your arm. This was the first time you went alone on a hunt and now you had a cut in your arm that just wouldn’t stop bleeding and bruises and smaller cuts all over your body. You grabbed your duffle bag in the back seat and made your way into the bunker, hearing voices coming from the kitchen.

“So… she didn’t told you were she was going?” – Dean asked.

“No, man… I mean, she said she had a case, but then told me we could take care of it tomorrow. I don’t think she would go on her on. She never done that!”

You dropped you duffle bag on the floor, causing a pain to go through your arm. You groaned in pain. The boys heard and came to see what that was. Then they saw you. Bloody, leaning against the table, eyes shut.

Keep reading