these might not make any sense out of context but oh well

I believe Spencer’s twin is coming.

In this post I want to give a list of reasons why Twincer is my prime suspect as AD. I know a lot of these ‘clues’ come from interviews, but they’re still really convincing for me at least. I’ve definitely missed some of the clues from within the show because they’re not as easy to spot - we need to know for sure if Twincer is happening, then we can dig further. (The fun won’t instantly stop once the finale airs.) But for now, enjoy these, and at the end, I give my theory as to the motive.

Please note: none of this is overly new. This is just the summation of everything we’ve been talking about on my blog for the past couple months. I wanted to put all the ideas into one post, rather than 31529 mini posts scattered here and there. I will be updating this as we find more. 

  1. The famous airport scene from 715.
    We all already think it’s weird that "Spencer" asked Ezra to not tell anyone he saw her there with Wren. What’s weirder, is the fact that Wren and “Spencer” were arguing. Amongst muffle, I heard Spencer say "stop calling me that" (let me know if you heard differently). Did Wren have a slip-of-the-tongue moment and call her Spencer rather than the twin’s real name?
  2. Dr. Cochran’s story is very telling.
    We all already know the ambiguous implication that Mary had more than two babies, because Dr. Cochran said he dealt with “two of Mary’s babies”. What’s more interesting is the second baby he dealt with. The first baby (Charlotte) he gave to Jessica. He said that the second baby that he delivered was placed in family county services. This could not have been Spencer, since Spencer was delivered to Veronica within 5 minutes of birth. So, who was that second baby that was placed in family services? I believe it was Spencer’s twin. Why? Dr Cochran referred to that second baby as “underweight but tenacious” - lo and behold, the next episode, Toby calls Spencer tenacious. This was the writers foreshadowing the similarities between this second baby, and Spencer. Twins. 
  3. We all know Hanna’s ‘dream’ in 701.
    It makes no sense that Hanna was able to dream ‘Spencer’ saying the name A.D. since Hanna was kidnapped before these initials were even revealed. Perhaps Hanna was visited by Twincer; the one holding her captive.
  4. A.D. needs to stand for something. 
    Spencer’s twin could literally have the initials A.D., since we know she would be Mary Drake’s child. Her first name would start with A and the D would stand for Drake. 
  5. Brendan and Ian both confessed to being confused by the identity of A.D.
    They needed the backstory to understand it. Is that because they had no idea who has the name “Alex Drake” (for example) ?
  6. Tyler said before 7B aired that “you’ve never met AD. You kind of have. You’ll know what I mean”.
    This can be interpreted in two ways: you’ve never met Twincer but since you know Spencer, you kind of know who AD is. Or. You’ve seen Twincer over the years, but thought it was Spencer. Either way, Tyler’s comment screams twin-theory to me. This could apply to any twin theory, but in this context, I’m using it for Spencer.
  7. Ian said (0:57) that “fans will be satisfied to a point. Right when it seems it’s gonna be really great, it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”….
    That cheeky smile on Ian’s face when he said “it seems it’s gonna be really great”… what could be greater than a liar being AD? Ian could be referring to the fact that they initially show us Troian under the hoodie, making us think Spencer is AD. Then, after commercial break, they will reveal it’s just her twin, hence the “it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”. We will be satisfied to a point, he said. It’ll start off amazing by thinking it’s Spencer, oh wait, it’s another twin.
  8. Ashley said (0:14) that she didn’t even know the A.D. reveal is possible.
    Because she did not expect a second pair of twins to come along?
  9. “It’s like there are two of you living in this house. You, and you’re evil twin, and we’re not sure who’s coming down to breakfast". 
    said Veronica to Spencer in 423. Foreshadowing at it’s finest.
  10. Spencer doesn’t remember this flashback.
    Was it her twin? And oh how coincidental, that the writers tell us a time Spencer doesn’t remember, in the same scene Veronica makes the above comment about Spencer’s “evil twin”.
  11. “Where are they?”
    said Mary as she entered the Hastings house (flashback from 717). Who is they? The twins? She proceeded to say that Spencer is the only good thing she’s ever made. Maybe Mary knows Spencer’s twin is evil, and is neglecting her. 
  12. “You look very much like your sister. Almost like twins”.
    said Mary to Spencer in 701. The writers wanted us to think that Mary was talking about Spencer and Melissa, since Mary was holding a picture of the half-sisters. But, were the writers, and therefore Mary, hinting towards Twincer? Is Mary being blackmailed/forced (by Peter?) to keep quiet on Twincer, and she had a slip-of-the-tongue moment here?
  13. Marlene is very aware of the Twincer theories.
    Back in 2014 she said that Troian sent her an online fan theory regarding Spencer having a twin who is A. Marlene was blown away by it and she thought it was a very well thought out plan with detailed evidence across the series. Watch from 1:35. Whilst you may be saying “there’s NO WAY Marlene spoilt her own show’s ending in an interview!!” - I feel like she had no idea the show would go on for 7 seasons, and once they got renewed, she panicked. “Shit, we need a new Uber A. Let’s go with that brilliant fan theory Troian sent me”. She probably regrets making this interview now. You can tell her passion for Twincer in this interview. She talks so damn highly of it.
  14. Marlene has said that the person who plays A.D. had known for a while.
    We know that Marlene told Troian the entire ending of the show years in advance. “Just like I had story time with Marlene, you all now get story time with Pretty Little Liars” said Troian.
  15. The girl in the coffin in the opening has the exact same black puffy shirt as Spencer.
  16. Why does it seem that A.D. is always going after the Hastings?
    Why shoot Spencer, out of all the liars? Why demand Aria to plant the audio device in the Hastings? Why not ruin the Marin household? The jealous twin wants her ungrateful sister dead, hence the shooting, and the jealous daughter is angry she never got adopted. Too much of the story is Hastings-oriented. 
  17. “They’re all some pretty. Good. Theories.”
    Was Janel’s response to being asked about the Spencer-twin theories. (22:20)
  18. And, I’ll just leave this here. Good one @prettylittlesessions​ !
  19. “Spencer’s” weird comments in 718.
    In 718 “Spencer” says to Toby “you know what its like to be the outsider. Removed from friends and family”. What made her say this? Nothing was said or done in 718 to prompt our Spencer to say this. 
  20. Keegan said there are no more Spoby kisses in 7B.
    “I can honestly say that there is not another Spoby kiss.” Yet - there was one in 718. Either Keegan lied, or that was Spencer’s twin. (10:15)
  21. “It’s somebody you have seen.”
    says Marlene in regards to who AD is. Was she talking about the Spoby kiss in 710, which Twincer referred to in 718 when she kissed Toby again? Marlene was very careful to avoid saying “it’s someone you KNOW”. We don't “know” Twincer. But, we have seen her.
  22. “That’s not the Spencer I know”
    said Toby in 718. Writers are foreshadowing.

Setting all this aside, I want to add my theory on the backstory and motive:

  • Twincer, who’s name is A_____ Drake, was born in Radley, as Dr. Cochran told us in 7A. 
  • Twincer was raised in Radley - not because she needed to be at a psychological hospital, but as a form of daycare, because Mary was deemed an unfit mother, and also she kept Twincer a secret from Peter… he already hated her (to the point of planning her murder, later on) enough for having one baby together, imagine Peter’s reaction to having twins.
  • There, Twincer met and bonded with her sister Charlotte. Charlotte became Twincer’s only friend. (Twincer might even be Bethany, since we already know of this bond between Bethany and Charlotte, and how Bethany was drawing Charles being taken away by a monster. But for this theory, let’s just forget Bethany for a second.)
  • When Mona came to Radley and started telling Charlotte about everything she did to her sister, Charlotte and Twincer wanted to play. They wanted a turn at harassing Spencer and her friends.
  • For Charlotte, as we know, it was the feeling of finally succeeding at something in life that made the game her drug. For Twincer, it was something far darker.
  • Harassing Aria, Hanna, Emily and Alison is all about driving a wedge between the girls. Twincer wants to break up the girls. Turn them against each other. Hopefully by throwing fire at the girls, they will break up, ultimately, to ruin Spencer’s life. Again, jealousy. Twincer’s plan is backfiring because it’s exactly A’s threats that makes Spencer say “we need each other more than ever” and “always stick together”. The writers keep making the point of SPENCER being the one to make the comments about “always” sticking together. Twincer cannot break Spencer and her bitches. This is fueling Twincer’s anger. Nothing is working.
  • That’s why AD/Twincer recently shot Spencer. “If I can’t break the girls up to ruin Spencer’s life, why not just become Spencer?” Twincer shot Spencer in an attempt to assume her identity and squeeze her way into the loving friendship group that she could never crack. “These girls are so loyal to each other… they don’t even break up after even my threats. Damn, I want to be a part of this. It’s my turn to live a happy life. You had your turn Spencer.”
  • Note: I do not believe that AD has been operating since season 1. Mona’s time as A is completely independent from Charlotte and Twincer’s story. Mona started the game, and now someone is ending it, and she wants to know who. Charlotte and Twincer are their own duo; their own A-team, which stemmed as a result of Mona coming to Radley. Charlotte revealed herself - next up in the A team is Twincer, who is carrying on the game she once played with her sister. 
Oh What A Night

Stiles did not hesitate outside Derek’s door. He hesitated in the parking lot, far enough away that Derek wouldn’t be able to hear his heartbeat and know that he was there for ten minutes before actually coming in. After those ten minutes were up, he took a deep breath and forced himself out of the Jeep.

He barged into Derek’s loft without bothering to knock, just like he usually did, and Derek didn’t even bother looking up from his book. It was something in French, it looked like, which was just not fair because how dare Derek be both ridiculously attractive and also fluently multilingual?

Sties did not let himself be distracted by the hot professor look Derek had going on with the French book and the steaming mug of tea and the argyle sweater, all laid out on the leather couch and soaked in sunbeams from the large wall of windows.

“Derek, my main man, I have a proposition for you.”

Derek looked up then, but only to raise an eyebrow at him. When Stiles didn’t break under the force of his judgment and go scurrying back from whence he came, Derek reluctantly closed his book and set it aside.

“I’m pretty sure Scott is your main man,” he said lightly. “And what proposition is this?”

“How would you like to help me stick it to some bigots?”

Both Derek’s eyebrows went up this time and Stiles mentally patted himself on the back for making him look so surprised. Getting any expression out of Derek Hale that wasn’t judgy or unimpressed was an accomplishment and Stiles kept a running tally of how many times he managed it.

“What kind of bigots?” Derek asked with caution that was both insulting and also probably warranted considering some of Stiles’ past shenanigans. “And stick it to them how exactly?”

Stiles took another deep breath and hoped his erratic heartbeat wasn’t giving him away. He was not going to let his awkwardness and inability to control his autonomic functions around Derek ruin his plan, not when the plan was so wonderfully petty and promised to be so very satisfying.

“Okay, so…” Stiles clapped his hands together and then held them out to the side, barely restraining the urge to do jazz hands. “I don’t know if you heard, but I came out at school a few weeks ago,” he said. “One seriously bisexual dude, right here, newly out and proud.”

“Oh,” Derek said, his beautiful face—a face worthy of a sexuality crisis, not that Stiles was ever, ever going to tell him about that—not really looking any more or less surprised than before the big revelation. “I hadn’t heard,” he said. “But that’s good. The out and proud part, I mean,” he added quickly. “Not the bigots, which are unfortunate but do make more sense with some context.”

“Yeah. Overall, it’s been fine,” Stiles said, tucking his hands into his pockets so he didn’t do something stupid like make finger guns. He had a tendency to make finger guns at inappropriate moments. “You know, most people really don’t care. But some people are just naturally douchebags.”

“Are they giving you trouble?” Derek asked, a frown creeping onto his face.

Stiles waved him off, then re-pocketed his hand.

“Keep the claws in, Sourwolf. I’m not getting shoved into lockers or anything. It’s just like…”

Stiles chewed on his lip, fighting back the wave of irritation that always accompanied his run-ins with the douchebags.

“Like, some of them insist that I’m actually gay and just too much of a coward to say it outright,” he said. “Others say I’m actually straight but can’t get a girl to sleep me, so I thought I’d try my hand at guys instead because I’m that undesirable and desperate to get laid. I’m just indecisive and greedy and afraid of commitment. That kind of bullshit.”

Derek was scowling outright now, hands fisted like he might actually pop his claws on Stiles’ behalf.

“That is bullshit,” he said heatedly. “But what do you want me to do about it? I’m assuming you’re not here to get me to tear their throats out.”

He looked like he might actually do it, though, if Stiles asked him to, and that warmed Stiles’ cold little heart.

“Uh, no,” Stiles said with a chuckle. “No, that seemed like a little much in the circumstances.”

“Then how am I supposed to help you get back at them?”

“By going to prom with me.”

Stiles was not surprised that this proclamation was met with silence.

“By going to…what?” Derek asked, righteous anger replaced by utter confusion.

“Prom,” Stiles repeated. “My senior prom. With me. As my date. Well, as one of my dates, actually.”

“Dates. Plural.”

“These assholes keep insisting that I have to ‘pick a side,’” Stiles said, air quotes and all. “They think I can’t like both women and men, or that neither women nor men could ever like me. I want to prove them wrong. I want to show up to prom with two dates, a boy and a girl, and rub it in all their faces that both my dates are hotter than any of theirs.”

Stiles ran a hand through his hair, his confidence in his brilliant plan waning ever so slightly in the face of Derek’s lack of reaction. He was just kind of staring. Maybe Stiles had finally come up with something so outlandish that he broke Derek. Or maybe Derek was going to clock him in the face and be horribly offended that Stiles was objectifying him or something.

“Erica already agreed to be my girl-date,” Stiles told him. “She’s actually really excited about it. A chance to flaunt her stuff and deliberately make a scene all night long? That’s right up her alley. And you…well, you are by far the most attractive guy I know, so I just thought…”

“You want me to go to senior prom with you, just to be your arm candy?” Derek asked slowly.

Stiles cringed.

“Uh, yeah, that sounds about right. But it’s for a good cause!”

There was another excruciatingly long beat of silence, and then Derek laughed. He laughed hard, head thrown back against the couch cushions, hands slapping against his knees, face scrunched up and shiny bunny teeth on full display. It was the kind of laugh that made Stiles’ heart skip a beat and he was very glad Derek was too preoccupied with his amusement to notice.

“Is this a good laugh or a bad laugh?” Stiles asked.

“Good laugh,” Derek choked out through continued chuckles, wiping at his streaming eyes.

“So does that mean you’ll do it?”

“Yeah,” Derek said, looking up at him with a smile that could stop wars. “Yeah, I’ll do it. Sounds like a good time to me. And, like you said, it’s definitely for a good cause.”

Stiles fist-pumped, already reveling in triumph at the thought of the looks that would be on those biphobic douchebags’ faces.

“I do have one condition, though.” Derek said.

“Anything, dude, you’re the best and I owe you, like, every favor on the planet.”

Derek’s smile widened, a gleam in his eye that made Stiles the tiniest bit hot under the collar.

“I get to pick your suit.”

(read the rest on AO3)

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anonymous asked:

What If one of the fakes had a high school reunion or something like that and just took the crew and it somehow ended in a shoot out with the cops.

Let’s just be clear, it’s not a pride thing. Geoff has never cared what people said about him, not outside a professional sense anyway; he knew exactly who he was, what he was capable of, even before he’d taken an entire city to its knees. So it’s not that he felt the need to prove himself, it’s just that there’s something particular about high school trauma, isn’t there? Something that lingers, even when it shouldn’t, something that emerges from even the most upstanding adults when thrown back together for a reunion, the bullies and the bullied, all desperate to show what they’ve become.

Geoff’s last high school was nothing like he’d ever been to before, a snobby upper-crust hellhole he was only in because his Ma’s third husband pulled some strings, and the other students were quick to point out just how much he didn’t belong. Between the tattoos and the smoking, the lazy looks and slow sneering drawl, it was always all too easy to label Geoff a loser, a drop out, trailer park trash everyone knew would be washing their cars one day. Never mind that he scored higher than most of his cohort even when skipping more or less every class, never mind that he is possibly the most well-read crime-lord in the country, back then he had an image and teenagers are relentless. Not that Geoff was all that phased even at the time, only a year or so away from the day he picked up his first gun and never looked back, but it’s the principal of the thing.

So when an invite forwards through from an email so old he’d forgotten he’d even made it Geoff has to laugh. Then pause, consider, hatch an utterly ridiculous idea, and laugh some more. Because he might not care, but that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t enjoy ruining the night for all the pathetic stuck-up nobodies he went to school with; rubbing your success in everyone’s faces is what reunions are for, after all. The fact that it has a theme, that it is masquerade of all things, really just cements Geoff’s resolve to drag his crew halfway across the country into one of the strangest nights of their lives.

Everyone knows the option to bring a guest to these events is, in reality, the offer to bring a romantic partner, singular, but it isn’t technically stated. There are no rules barring Geoff from RSVP-ing for 7, so that’s exactly what he does. Sure he receives a few increasingly less polite emails suggesting he’d been mistaken but he doesn’t even bother opening them, doesn’t try to clarify that he is bringing his friends, his family, not his entire harem. Let them talk; they’d do it anyway. Plus, it’s not like the Fake’s aren’t all entirely too pleased with the suggestion, cackling hyenas who spend the next few weeks laying it on thick, batting their eyes and blowing Geoff kisses, picking out increasingly absurd meet-cute stories to tell his scandalised classmates. Between creating new identities and playing dress up in masks and suits they couldn’t be happier.

Masks or not they catch every eye in the room when they make their entrance and why wouldn’t they; Geoff and his unusual request must have been the talk of the rumour mill and identity hidden or not clearly this must be Geoff, it’s not like anyone else brought along 6 dates. As stage whispers hit a dull roar it’s obvious no one was prepared for what they were seeing, perhaps imagined instead stained tank tops and a string of strung-out baby mama’s, not expensively tailored suits and an attractively refined entourage. Paying the noise no heed Geoff swans into the room with Jack looking elegant on one arm, Gavin at his most Ken-doll glamorous tucked under the other, flanked on either side by Ryan, Michael, Jeremy and Ray, all dressed to impress.

Shock and jealousy aren’t good looks on anyone, let alone rich brats turned elitist yuppies, so Geoff’s classmates behave just as poorly as he’d anticipated, years and newfound maturity doing nothing to stop the tittering laughter, the sneers and judgmental looks, fake pleasantry and condescending questions. But then, his crew didn’t exactly play nice with them either.

Ray and Jeremy immediately beeline to the food table and bar, respectively, and each set themselves up and settle in for the night; loud, obnoxious and tactlessly talking about everyone around them. When asked about themselves or their relationship to Geoff they’re both frustratingly vague, Jeremy chattering away without saying much at all and Ray simply staring people down until they can’t bear the tension.

Michael and Ryan set off together to explore the room but quickly separate to accommodate their vastly different methods of surveillance. Ryan skulks into the background, ducking numerous attempts to catch his interest in favour of fading into unlit corners and empty nooks, frightening the life out of anyone trying to slip away for some private time. Michael, on the other hand, seems determined to be the life of the party, cheerfully making conversation only to laugh in the face of every so-called achievement, ruffling feathers and causing major offence wherever he goes.

Gavin slinks off like a man on a mission and doesn’t come back for over an hour, offering no explanation for the absence beyond a dangerously self-satisfied smirk. His work becomes obvious soon enough anyway, once the yelling starts; Geoff’s two main high-school tormentors, mentioned only in passing stories over the years, simultaneously having huge, public, relationship-ending blow ups with each of their significant others. What are the odds? Across the hall Gavin laughs, all tinkling glass and sparkling charm, smoothly working the room like Michael’s mirror opposite.

Jack stays at Geoff’s side all night, hackles raised into something abnormally cold and unimpressed any time someone comes up to speak to them, protective instincts in full force no matter how often Geoff claims to be unaffected. He fills her in on all the worst gossip about those who approach, and as the night progresses and general unease begins to spread Jack mellows, sinking back into something sweet and mocking, somehow even more unsettling playing docile arm-candy than she was rabid guard dog.

Throughout the night the Fake AH Crew remain a key topic of every casual conversation; they might have been regardless, even this far from Los Santos no one can get enough of their scandals, but with the huge heist pulled just last week there was no way to avoid it, everyone has their two cents, their praise and condemnation. It’s too funny, the whole crew killing themselves trying not to break character, to laugh or correct or manipulate the conversation but all their self-control is well rewarded in the end.

Half the room removed their masks less than an hour into the night; too difficult to eat and talk and drink in, too vain to keep their hard earned looks covered, so it’s not at all strange when the Fake’s start to follow suit. Jeremy and Ray start it, the newest member and the one caught on camera the least often, casually dropping their masks mid-conversation. They each get a confused squint or two, a double glance, a few individuals trying to place them, remember how they’d met before, why they were so familiar.

Next came Gavin and Michael, having goaded each other out onto the dance-floor they were playing as much as they were moving to the music, laughing and grappling and generally making a bit of a scene. They snatch off each other’s masks as they play and the looks double, because alone they’re each distinctive but together, together, people have seen those faces together, somewhere they’ve seen them and so often together..

Last is Jack and Geoff, more graceful than their counterparts and moving with far more purpose they reveal their faces in the centre of the room and, like a party trick, they instantly catch the whole room’s attention. Out of context, in ones and twos where they don’t belong, the members of the FAHC could be mistaken but no one in the country would fail to recognise Ramsey and Patillo, the kingpin and his right hand, rulers of the most well-known gang in the US. And here they stand, casually mingling at a high school reunion.

In the calm before the storm the crew gravitates back towards one another, can almost see the cogs turning around them, the lightbulbs flickering on in a slow ripple spreading out across the room, disbelief and the first hint of horror swirling together as people start unconsciously reaching for their phones. As Ryan slips back out and wanders over, the last still masked, always masked, the chatter seems to crescendo then crash into something still and almost silent as a room full of entitled trust-fund babies recognise their own terror.

Finally uncovered and flanked by his family Geoff’s grin creeps across his face, slow and violent and more confirmation than anyone needed as he lets the oppressive tension sit for a long moment, arms spreading out to his sides like a magician revealing a clever trick before he breaks the silence; Surprise motherfuckers.

Guns are pulled from jackets and from there it’s all running and screaming, no honour or courage, just a stampede for the exits to the sound of cackling laughter and the occasional aimless pot-shot. The Fake’s aren’t looking for lives, not worth the hassle really, and this job certainly has no monetary reward beyond the wallets Geoff’s filthy little thieves have no doubt absconded with, but the fear in the air is delightful and even the sound of incoming sirens can’t ruin the mood. If anything it only hypes them up further, all savage grins and ramping excitement as they make for doors, reloading their weapons and pumping themselves up for a whole new police force to terrorise, Geoff’s magnificent little miscreants.

On the way out they pass a wall of yearbook photos, blown up large and captioned with names and all the old superlative awards. Ryan stumbles to a halt and snorts, snatching one off the wall and tucking it into his jacket to take back to the penthouse, though not before flashing the Lads a glance at that all too recognisable face, sending them into peals of screeching laughter as they pour out into the night. Geoffrey Fink; Least likely to succeed. 

Goldilocks || 08

Rated T (language and light smut)

Warnings: a sprinkle of MM smut, and just general cringe worthy stuff

Summary: After getting evicted, your two best friends Jimin and Taehyung offer you a place to stay until you get back on your feet. Needless to say, with a part time job and a mountain of student debt, that’s not happening any time soon. Eventually, they DO become really fond of having you around, helping with chores and even splitting rent. So when you come home one day to find someone has been sleeping in your couch-bed, well… it’s something you won’t take lightly.

Word Count: 5k

Out of context Goldilocks quote:
“Well, you’ve got a nice butt so why not be a booty call?”

Links to: Goldilocks Masterlist || Previous || Next Part

not my gif, credit to owner


Part 8:

He doesn’t break eye contact. Far from it. The golden haired stranger standing across the kitchen cockily keeps your gaze and honestly? Why would you look away? He’s attractive, you’ll give him that. No, don’t lie. He’s panty-dropping gorgeous.

Bracing your ego for possible rejection, you try to remind yourself that he’s just another person.

Just another person…

Just another…

Your palms get clammy and for some reason, your feet stop moving. Halfway across the room now, you haven’t dropped his curious stare. His head tilts slightly at your hesitation. Another invitation. You don’t move.

“____! I’ve been looking everywhere for you,” Jimin seems unusually chipper as his arm suddenly encircles your shoulders, giving you a welcome excuse to break the intense eye contact.

“Chim, the apartment’s not that big.”

“Yeah, but I bumped into Tae and he didn’t know where you- by the way, have you seen his pants anywhere? He’s lost them again.”

You shake your head, a laugh bubbling up in your stomach, “I honestly think he does it on purpose.”

Jimin’s eyes narrow thoughtfully as he releases you to set down his empty beer bottle, “Knowing him? Probably.”

The pause in the conversation allows your eyes to wander. The golden haired stranger has disappeared, much to your disappointment, but also an observation tinted with slight relief. You turn back to Jimin.

“So… you were looking for me?”

“Right! There’s actually someone here I want you to meet. His name is Jungkook. I’ve known him for a couple years from my… one of my classes. And he’s a really cool guy,” Jimin grabs your wrist, leading you out of the kitchen. “We just have to find him-”

You are ripped from Jimin’s grasp as you trip over someone’s foot and slam knees first into the side of the couch. Pain blossoms in your legs and you let out a string of curses, retreating a few steps just to back into something solid. It’s not quite clear as you turn around whether you’re about to apologize or tell the person off, but all potential words lock in your throat as the feeling of something cold and wet trickles down the front of your dress.

Your new dress. The really expensive one. The really expensive one your family sent you for your birthday. Yeah, that family that you never talk to anymore. It had been a small glimmer of hope that maybe they still care. And now look at it.

Mystery alcohol all down the front. Smells like beer.

Now facing the culprit, you’re about to (without question) unleash a slew of impromptu curses. But then your gaze travels to his face and all you can see is the golden hair and the lipstick stain on his mouth. Had that been there before? The kitchen was dark and there had been a few people in the way, but wouldn’t you have seen it? And how could he have…so fast…?

“Oh, this is awkward.  ____, this is Jungkook-”

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bananannabeth  asked:

hey fee, what's going on?? i havent properly been on tumblr in like a week and a half or read tdp because uni is taking up all my time but i just saw your post and??? omg??? what??? im really sorry and i hope youre okay (i know that sounds shallow but like.. as okay as you can be when people are obviously being idiots)

usually i wouldn’t answer this publicly but like i am genuinely shocked by the vitriol being targeted at lesbians right now and like it’s the most thinly veiled attacks i’ve ever seen, people are barely even bothering to try and disguise what this is really about (read: “shut up you evil dykes we’re sick of listening to you complain about lesbian issues and we want to be left alone”). it’s gone like way beyond the realm of fandom discourse at this point.

an overview of what happened:

  • the dark prophecy was released a few weeks ago (so, spoilers for that, but it’s really not a big spoiler and i kept it quite vague and tbh y’all should probably read this anyway because like i said, it’s gone way beyond the realm of fandom discourse at this point).
  • it contains an older lesbian couple, who had to leave the hunters of artemis because they fell in love and wanted to be together. upon meeting them, one of the characters mentions that they thought it was only men the hunters of artemis swore off of, but the apollo corrects them and says it’s actually all romance.
  • (it’s worth mentioning that apollo says this bitterly. as in: he doesn’t approve or agree. and not for nothing, i might be projecting, but it sounds a lot less like “i’m a god with an overactive sex drive and my sister’s such a PRUDE” and a lot more like “i’m bisexual and i feel uncomfortable with this rule”)
  • this lesbian couple is upset about leaving the hunters. they wouldn’t have done so if they hadn’t had to, they say it was their family, but they had to leave because they loved each other more.
  • apollo mentions that they parted on good terms with artemis, because “she let you live” (good terms, those). the hunters visit them sometimes. artemis does not.
  • so, it is now canon that the hunters of artemis do not condone love between lesbian couples, and lesbian and bi girls who fall in love are no longer welcome in the hunt.
this doesn’t sit well with me, or several other lesbians and bi girls (or apollo, or the lesbian couple themselves, it seems like).
for several reasons:
  • grouping in heterosexual love in the exact same category as lesbian love is homophobic. it’s not a discussion of “equality” but rather an acknowledgement that lesbian love as it exists in the world today is socially taboo and forbidden, and thus banning lesbian love has the potential to do much, much more damage than banning heterosexual love.
  • implying that all romance, and in this case specifically lesbian romance, is against a code of honor, is homophobic. there’s just no way around this. actively being uncomfortable with lesbians in love for no other reason than the fact that they’re in love carries massively homophobic connotations with it. it just does. sneering at all romance doesn’t negate this problem. lesbians can be hurt in ways that straight girls cannot. sneering at their romance is homophobic, because as much as we all might hate it, the world is homophobic and banning lesbian romance absolutely does reinforce this system of homophobia. it does. (this is like, oppression basics, u guys. if u pretend oppression isn’t there, ur siding with the oppressor. “i don’t see differences in sexuality and hate all romance equally” = “i do not acknowledge that some of you need different precautions and protections because you are systematically oppressed in ways that others are not”). we are not all socially equal. we’re not starting on the same playing field. heterosexual love is not a social taboo, lesbian love is, case in point: it hurts lesbians much worse to ban their love than it does straight people. not to mention that it’s triggering for people who have been in spaces that actually did ban lesbianism (hi, me, it wasn’t a fun time, and i don’t appreciate the hunters having any resemblance to my hellish private school experience).
  • artemis is evidently quite hostile towards lesbians..for being lesbians. like, loving women is what makes you a lesbian, and if that bothers her so much that they can’t even be around her and be together…i mean, what can we conclude about her? shunning all love, in this case, specifically lesbian love, and apparently not even having it off the table that she might decide to kill them, is homophobic. it doesn’t work like “oh well she’s uncomfortable with all love in general.” you can’t hide bigotry by widening the radius of people you hate. you will never be able to disguise homophobia by also hating straight people. if anything, that’s even more homophobic, because it lumps us right in under a massive group of “people who fall in love” which…includes straight people, who systematically oppress us. not a fan of being compared to my oppressors. certainly not a fan of being banished alongside them.
  • it’s very important to note that plenty of lesbians feel this is a complete misrepresentation of artemis and the hunt, and are quite upset that someone they identified with apparently hates them. (and she does. artemis wants nothing to do with lesbians who are in love, refuses to allow them to be in love and also in her hunt, gave them an ultimatum between her and each other, would consider murdering them).
  • like, we’re not working off nothing, here. artemis has ABSOLUTELY historically been associated with lesbianism. i’m not pulling this out of my ass, okay. lesbian themes are present in tons of artemis’ myths, her “loving women” is mentioned in virtually everything ever written about her. granted, it’s never specified to be romantic or sexual, but keep in mind the time that these myths were being recorded and who was doing the recording (read: men who thought lesbianism wasn’t real). many hellenic wlw follow artemis today precisely for this reason. separating artemis from lesbianism is Not The Best Move rick’s ever had lmao.
  • the oath specifically says no men in titan’s curse. it absolutely does. if you assumed this also meant no romance at all, that’s on you and your heteronormative thinking, bud. but it reads “I, [name], pledge myself to the goddess Artemis. I turn my back on the company of men, accept eternal maidenhood, and join the hunt.”
  • pledging “eternal maidenhood” means “i’ll be a virgin” in children’s book speak. if you don’t believe me, notice how they refer to athena as a “maiden” goddess, but really mean “she can’t naturally conceive children [because she’s celibate].” they don’t mean “she’s single,” they mean “she doesn’t have sex.” maiden is a nicer term, but it means virgin: [adjective 1. (of a woman, especially an older one) unmarried. synonyms: unmarried, spinster, unwed, unwedded, single, husbandless, celibate.] we’re all familiar with the concept that you’re only allowed to have sex after you’re married to a man, right? well, that’s the assumptions this word was created under. don’t play dumb and try and say maidenhood means being eternally single; we all know what it really means and why the term exists. it doesn’t say wifeless, or even spouseless, it says husbandless. nobody was thinking about lesbians when they defined that word and rick wasn’t thinking about lesbians when he wrote the oath. thus: artemis is a virgin goddess who accepts virgins who pledge a vow of eternal virginity. that makes sense, because atemis is indeed a virgin goddess (literally the goddess of virginity) and some of her worst myths involve her kicking out hunters for “losing their virginity.” that’s got it’s own set of problems.
  • and yes, i am aware that artemis also explains the hunters “foreswear romantic love forever.” yeah, i got it. but she says this sentence in clarification to percy’s question—artemis says they’re immortal unless they break their oath. percy asks what oath. artemis says “to foreswear romantic love forever.” and as i just explained, the oath does not say that. she might’ve specified romantic love, but like, can we not play dumb here? it’s heteronormative. nuns also take a chastity pledge, but do we expect that this applies to gay nuns? no, we really don’t. like, don’t lie and say you were some enlightened ten year old being who read this line and thought “oh, thanks for clarifying artemis, i was wondering about lesbians.”
  • there’s like, an actual reason that artemis and her hunters swear off men: they’re dangerous. when she initially began her hunt, her mission was to rescue girls from being sold off to husbands they didn’t want to marry, or escaping abusive situations with their betrotheds and fathers (zoe nightshade, anyone?). i don’t see….when or why that turned into “all romance is distracting and inherently bad.” it’s not really very sensical. romance and sex were never the evils facing the hunt, it was the patriarchy.
  • in short: the hunt has become a hot fucking mess and lesbians (and bi girls but seeing as we’re specifically talking within the context of lesbian love it’s really implied that anyone who has the potential to experience that is part of the discussion) are upset. rick deserves a certain amount of blame for this.

now, see, the problem here that people can’t seem to get through their heads is that we’ve got a right to be upset about this. we are allowed to be upset about confronting homophobia in a character most of us liked and identified with.

  • and us complaining about that, explaining it, and pointing it out is…not “starting discourse”, however much you may think we’re crazy sjw dykes. i’m really not here in general for how any time someone is critical of a piece of media for valid reasons they’re immediately starting “wank” and “discourse.” it’s a misuse of the terms. discourse doesn’t mean “people have an opinion on why their marginalized group was represented badly” and wank doesn’t mean “we think this is homophobic” and you calling it that is a pathetic excuse to ignore what we’re saying. which is not to mention how incredibly transparent it is—discourse goes on in this fandom all the time. literally all the time. i’ve never seen anyone complain half as much about “fandom discourse” before as i have this past week.
  • and then there’s people derailing the conversation by making it about aroace erasure. first of all, it’s possible to like, talk about multiple things at the same time and there’s no reason why us discussing lesbians should have any bearing on aroace representation. second of all…. the hunters are like, not… technically even aroace? taking a vow of chastity and swearing off men is now equivalent to being aroace? does nobody see a problem with that? i’m stunned that people weren’t angry about that, to be honest, since it’s not exactly Controversial or New to say that asexuality does not equal celibacy and aromanticism does not equal an… eternal no romance pledge or whatever the fuck the oath even means anymore. like, cool, i understand you might be more inclined to take the oath if you didn’t experience sexual or romantic attraction, but that’s still a far cry from saying all of the hunters are aro and ace (and that’s. clearly not true. because some of them break their oaths. or join because they’ve been scorned by men they’ve fallen in love with).
  • which like, not to mention that they’re pretty hideous representation for you in general if they literally kill people who wind up falling in love? like, that’s your holy grail of representation? “you must have parted on good terms, she let you live” like okayyyy so you mean artemis’ typical course of action in dealing with girls who fall in love is to murder them? the fuck is wrong with yall 
  • people are actually offering this up as a benchmark for why artemis isn’t homophobic. she murders hunters who fall in love with men, but she let the lesbians live. like. this is the benchmark for lesbian allyship now, apparently. holy hell, people.
  • but sure, yeah, artemis, aroace patron goddess, who murders hunters that fall in love and refuses to offer protection to lesbians because they also fall in love, and calls love a “distraction” and thus pretends she’s the Enlightened One who isn’t sullied by romance. good one, guys. if that’s what you’re celebrating, and furthermore, if that’s the representation i’m “erasing” by talking about lesphobic issues, not only are you homophobic but like you’re just a plain old misogynist lmao. i don’t condone literally killing girls for falling in love and i certainly fucking thought it would go without saying that you people don’t condone that either, but apparently not! fucking hell.
  • which, anyway, even working under the assumption that it was good aroace representation, to accuse lesbians of erasure for being critical of how lesbianism is portrayed in a book? as if we were the ones who decided to include an ex-hunters lesbian couple? but we’re the ones who are guilty of the erasure for..what..talking about it? being angry? saying it’s homophobic? being upset that lesbians aren’t allowed in the hunt?
  • like, look, if artemis was presented in canon as someone who doesn’t experience attraction and started a convent for other girls who don’t, well that would be different, wouldn’t it? but she’s not presented that way. she’s apparently the patron to all women, so long as they don’t date men. zoe nightshade says she’ll accept anyone who takes the oath, no matter their species, and definitely regardless of their sexuality as well (because at the very least, zoe, the literal lieutenant, most definitely had other reasons for joining than being aroace, as did thalia, the current lieutenant, and emmie and jo are obviously not aroace yet still took the oath once, and annabeth even thought about taking the oath). it’s not, and never has been, about lack of romantic attraction. it’s about eternally swearing off all romance and banning love because love is bad.
  • i guess we all should’ve known this considering silena is all up in arms about the hunters telling her “love is worthless” in ttc, but damn call me stupid for daring to hope that as rick began to confront the rampant heteronormativity in his books we might have this patched up, too.
  • pro tip for like literally anything ever: if a marginalized group speaks up and says “hey that’s hurting us” you change your goddamn rules so it’s not anymore. like, for fucks sake, think about this in literally any other context but “lesbians are infiltrating artemis’ precious aroace safe space with their romance” and you’ll realize what condescending, homophobic fucks y’all are behaving like right now.
  • on another note: i have expressly explained this before, many times (there’s a link to one of them earlier in this post, and here’s another one), but it apparently bears repeating because nobody seems to understand: virginity is bullshit. it’s bullshit. it’s oppressive, invasive, creepy, misogynistic bullshit. will you stop pulling out this tired old argument that lesbians being allowed in the hunt somehow makes them invalidated? the idea that romance is distracting is stupid and ridiculous and condescending as fuck. the idea that your sexual history is anybody’s business but your own is disgusting. there’s no reason lesbians shouldn’t be able to be together in the hunters. there’s really not. there is a reason men are not allowed, and the reason is it’s a women’s space, to literally protect women from men.
  • this new information about the hunters cheapens the whole goddamn thing. like aside from being homophobic, it’s just plain sexist, now, too—we don’t swear off men because we’re making a statement about our lives in relation to the patriarchy, oh no!! we’re making a statement against romance. romance is bad. that’s the problem. who cares about protecting women from men? certainly not us, because we’ll kill you if you get abused by them! better keep your v card honey, or i’ll turn you into a bear!
  • and that brings me to the whole other subset of people trying to derail the conversation by making it about..rick hate? lol what? that rick is our ally and we should be grateful and he’s not perfect and he’s learning??? yeah, okay, i’m sure the answer to this is for all of us to just never talk about it at all? we’re not allowed to critique our own goddamn representation? how the fuck is he supposed to learn if you just try and smother everyone who tries to critique him by saying “HE’S A GOOD ALLY WHO IS STILL LEARNING!” like…cool? and i’m teaching him that i don’t approve of any of this, and i think it was a really underhanded way to represent us, not to mention still has gaping flaws in it?
  • like, yeah, whatever, i get it, artemis has her hideous flaws in greek myths as well. poseidon’s a rapist, hades’ is an abusive stalker, zeus is a megalomaniac serial rapist, but it’s not as though those were the characters rick chose to make look this bad, now was it? nope, it was artemis. he didn’t have to do that.
  • and even if he did, honestly, at the end of the day…who cares? it doesn’t matter who first created artemis this way. the fact of the matter is that in the series, she is, and that’s homophobic. it doesn’t negate the fact that we’re reeling from encountering homophobia from the hunters. it certainly doesn’t give anyone a license to tell us to shut up and get over it and stop talking and stop blaming rick. it’s homophobic. we’re allowed to talk about it, and be upset about it. let us fucking be.
  • of course the most hilarious thing is that this wouldn’t have even turned into “discourse” in the first place if y’all had just shut your fucking mouths and listened to us. instead, you started arguing, spreading around passive aggressive posts calling us too angry and telling us to chill out, sent us anon hate, blocked us, unfollowed us, and started complaining about all the other things i listed that are just fundamentally missing the point.

anonymous asked:

I thought people were talking about hating how many food-related lines he is because it was a fat people related stereotype?

I mean, my issue with that, personally, is like…

Hunk talks about food like it’s an art form and a personal passion and a lot of his interest in food is he’s more interested in making it for other people than he is in gorging himself?

The idea of “all fat people love food too much because they’re gluttonous and weak-willed and that’s why they’re fat” is legitimately awful, don’t get me wrong, but my impression has never been we’re supposed to take Hunk’s interest in food as a joke at his expense, or a joke at all?

It’s something that could be handled grossly or insensitively, but it’s presented pretty much neutral and almost every conceivable instance it’s brought up, it’s used to hammer home more that Hunk is a master chef and has very refined and complex opinions on food. 

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anonymous asked:

a prompt: spock standing close to the captains chair + accidental touching

the working title of this fic was “touchy touchy” if that tells you anything ghfjdks

Loud and Clear (read it on ao3 here)

“Hey, Spock? Could you come over here and look at this report for a second?”

Spock turned promptly from his station at the sound of his captain’s voice, catching sight of Jim’s bright smile before anything else. Spock nodded once and briskly walked over to stand at the side of the captain’s chair, placing a hand on the back of it yet still hyper-aware of making sure he did not touch Jim. However, Jim immediately leaned back, his bare neck resting against the knuckle of Spock’s thumb. He could not find it in himself to move away.

“So, see, it says here that Kollona is a desert planet, right? And I know we’re still a few days away from it, but I was doing some reading up on it and read that it has an extensive rainforest? Which would not make sense at all, obviously, but…” Jim’s voice faded out in Spock’s ears as he suddenly got a bright flash of thought through their skin to skin contact.

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BTS Reaction ;; Witty Girlfriend

I didn’t have a better title for it, haha! Hope you enjoy it!



You weren’t usually very open to telling Jin about the feedback fans gave about you. You were very well aware of the hate some of the fans had, though you opted to concentrate on the positivity and love ARMYs provided. Though once in a while, you would let Jin see what was happening in the privacy of your inbox. He was clearly worried— biting on his bottom lip, constantly flickering his eyes through the various lines of exclamations, though it was amusing how bothered he was whereas you couldn’t care less.

Though, he started laughing in the next moment which prompted you to pay more attention to what he had found. He was laughing too heavily to answer your inquires so he just showed you the screen and thread which he had opened.

‘You know, you’re so bitchy, I just hope you go fuck yourself!’ It read, but your reply put it to absolute shame.

‘No, thank you. I have Jin for that.’ You laughed quietly, blushing at the realization of Jin having read that, yet he didn’t mind it much, or so it seemed with him doubling over from laughter.

“I didn’t expect anything less from you… Come over here, let me show them that you have me for that.”

Originally posted by seokjins-wings


Yoongi knew that you were witty; of course, he never doubted that you’d be completely good on your own. He wasn’t one to stress about it, and you weren’t one for it either— you were there for him, not to abandon him after a comment or two from a fan whom was a mere stranger to you. It was ridiculous, really, so you rather had fun with whatever came your way than be embarrassed and shocked by it. Though, when he found you laughing to your phone screen one afternoon, he couldn’t help his curiosity.

He grabbed your phone without question, and he gave the screen a lazy glance, enough to read through the few lines that were crucial for the matter, ‘How the fuck do you even have a boyfriend with that body of yours?’

‘Obviously, he likes it enough to show me, and you seem pretty fond of it too if your comments are only about it. (:’

He snorted, putting the device down to pull you closer to him, pecking your lips all whilst he was smiling. He was proud of you.

Originally posted by seokjins-wings


He always made sure not to leave you in a situation too uncomfortable. Hoseok is the type that would hate himself if any harm was done to you—be it physical or verbal, so he would be pretty cautious whenever he was with you in public or whenever anything with the two of you in context was published online. Though, he never thought that instead of some supposed fans attacking that it’d be a random man in the middle of your walk together. He was just getting ice cream for the two of you, leaving you on the bench (which you both claimed) for a couple of minutes.

He saw a man approaching you, almost sitting down next to you, and Hoseok immediately started power walking with two ice cream cones in his grip. He arrived just in time to hear a part of the conversation—probably the most important part of it.

“Need a hand there, honey?” You barely even glanced the man’s way, smiling at Hoseok whom was approaching, “No, thanks, I have my boyfriend for that,” ultimately, you blushed at your bold statement but it was enough to make the man leave you alone with Hoseok. And Hoseok pulled you in for a long, passionate kiss because his chest was swelling with happiness, and he couldn’t help himself.

“That’s my girl.”

Originally posted by seokjins-wings


It never happened before, and neither were you scared of getting any kind of messages from others; so Namjoon never gave it a second thought when he made your relationship public. He was too busy being happy with you to think of the consequences, else he would be the worried boy that he is. In a sense, it was highly irresponsible from him, and he only realized it when it did start happening. Though, you barely opened your Twitter aside from viewing the boys’ tweets.

He had a laugh, though. When he opened the aforementioned app, and saw a tweet of your own for the public display. You were replying to another user; Namjoon was initially scared of what had happened, worrying that it would be the same as it was with Wale and fans pushing him away. ‘Damn, @Y/U/N should learn her place smh who the fuck is gonna be there for her when she’s such a bitch?’

‘I don’t need no one else except my bf, duh.’ He was beyond pleased with your reply, and he was even tempted to retweet—though, he’d need permission for that. He made sure to show you just how happy he was the moment he saw you.

Originally posted by rapnamu


Jimin’s schedule finally settled, and he decided to spend every single second of his free time with you. It involved in staying in till late in bed, eating lunch together, and spending nights going on dates when his face was mostly hidden from the crowd. He was feeling quite content in the peace, knowing that no one could recognize him and ruin the intimacy between the two of you—except that people could recognize you.

It wasn’t a fan, and yet the two of you wished that it was. The mood ruiner was your ex boyfriend, smiling smugly at you. You were the one to break up with him cause he is, for the lack of better word, an asshole. Though, even after the relationship he took every chance he could get to ruin your life.

“Hey, babe. You know that story about girls always going for their ex? Seeing as I’m your only one, how about it?” At his words, you turn to Jimin with the sweetest smile possible when he tried getting up to his feet to, probably, punch the guy, “Jimin, I’m breaking up with you.”

To that, both of the males were extremely confused, though you were kissing Jimin in the next moment, “Okay, I got back with my ex now, the story is true. Too bad you’re not that ex. Goodbye,” you waved the guy off, and Jimin finally started laughing, squeezing your hand tightly.

“I cannot believe you just did that…”

Originally posted by jimiyoong


To some fortune, the fans seemed to love you. Taehyung was quite glad that you were accepted because he wouldn’t know what to do if you weren’t—sure, he’d be pretty upset but those fans also supported them in a sense, and he would be torn to just not accept them as fans. It was complicated to lead this life, but all’s well that ends well. Though, the strangest of things can happen even when people love you. Specifically, it had to be when you were suddenly approached by a fan—a male fan of theirs and, seemingly, yours.

“(Y/n)! Oh my god, it’s (Y/n)!” You both were dumbstruck, to say the least. You looked at the fan with a confused expression, managing to stutter out a decent reply to which the boy nodded, obviously beyond happy that you were talking to him. Taehyung squeezed your hand a bit tighter, afraid of what might happen.

“(Y/n), can I please be your Oppa?” Yes, you were quite mortified, though not as much as your boyfriend next to you. You smiled sheepishly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear before replying, “I’m sorry, but I already have my Oppa with me, right here.” You grinned, holding up your intertwined hands. The fan left with a good laugh, but Taehyung was blushing furiously—as were you.

“That was… eventful.” He chuckled.

Originally posted by jimiyoong


He was pretty shy about the relationship—yes, he was proud and the happiest, but whenever it came up in a regular conversation or, God forbid, in an interview or fan meeting, he really didn’t know what to say. Not that he didn’t have anything to say, but simply he wasn’t the type to exclaim his happiness and love, so he only blushed and smiled at the mention of you. Though, when you were present in an interview with him—exclusively they needed you, and you couldn’t deny that request seeing as you didn’t have a lawyer or agency behind your back.

Though, he knew that the interview was a bust the moment they started rolling in messages from the ARMYs and, inevitably, fans whom had a knack for hating. Specifically, a message came up directed towards you which the staff didn’t view properly—and, of course, it wasn’t the kindest of message.

“(Y/n) should learn her place, probably get owned for all her shit! lmao what makes her better than me????” The interviewer read with a nervous chuckle, about to comment how you needn’t reply to the fan.

“Don’t worry, Jungkook keeps me in place just right,” you winked suggestively at the camera, “Nothing makes me better than you, you are the only one thinking that.” The interviewer and Jungkook both were stunned, but the guy laughed in the next moment relieving the tension, and Jungkook was smiling.

Originally posted by nnochu

Goldilocks || 04

Rated M (language and smut)

Warnings: dry humping, breast play

Summary: After getting evicted, your two best friends Jimin and Taehyung offer you a place to stay until you get back on your feet. Needless to say, with a part time job and a mountain of student debt, that’s not happening any time soon. Eventually, they DO become really fond of having you around, helping with chores and even splitting rent. So when you come home one day to find someone has been sleeping in your couch-bed, well… it’s something you won’t take lightly.

Word Count: 3.9k

Out of context Goldilocks quote:
“If you guys are done making butt jokes I’d really like to watch this movie.”

Link to: Goldilocks Masterlist || Previous Part || Next Part

not my gif, credit to owner


A/N: OH LOOK THE RATING CHANGED. Yeah so imma just leave this here and run. No EOPQ, but feedback is appreciated and depending on the reaction, I might be a hoe and drop 05 tomorrow. If you’re someone who doesn’t like smut, asterisk* is where it starts, skip until the *asterisk where it ends. You won’t be missing plot stuff. I made sure of that. NOW I’M GONNA RUN BYE~~


Taehyung has always loved boobs.

It has become apparent over the past few years of your close friendship that it isn’t even a sexual thing sometimes. He simply loves boobs. Perky, droopy, big, small, even man-boobs. He’s explained several times that “they’re just like, really comfy, okay?”

The sad thing is, you can completely believe him, and this is one of the main reasons why you choose to cross your arms when he begins pleading, unabashed as Jungkook and Jimin look on.

“Baby, just come cuddle with me,” Taehyung laughs, gesturing in a pitiful attempt to persuade you to join him, speaking loudly to be heard above both the pouring rain outside and the dialogue of the movie.

“Go take care of your boner first,” you retort.

Taehyung’s lips slip into an easy, suggestive smile, “Wanna help me with that? Or should I say… give me a hand?”

You stifle a laugh, “The only hand I’ll be giving you is my entire fist up your ass.”

“Damn baby, that’s a bit much. Can’t we just start with a finger?”

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The All Might Protection Squad

@athanatosora‘s All Might Protection Squad content is pure and good and is also the reason I get up in the morning, so I wrote this. Enjoy!

“…And that’s, well, the bulk of what I remember. The rest is a bit hazy. I could maybe give you pieces, but nothing useful. After the fight I just…ended up here.” All Might tugged loosely at the linen of his bed sheets, as if their presence proved something. He opened his mouth to speak again, but found nothing to say. So he shrugged and looked away.

Tsukauchi gave a nod, ran his pen twice over his notebook pad to clear off the ink from its tip, and dropped it back into his pocket. He leaned forward, commanding in his presence. “Yeah, I don’t expect too much else from you. The fight was televised, so in terms of what physically happened we’ve got our fill.” Tsukauchi tapped his badge. “I’m mostly here because the station keeps sending me over.”

“Tell them to knock it off then. You’ve got more important things to do than babysit me I’m sure.” All Might answered with an air of flippancy. He leaned his head against the pillow, eyes closed.

“Well that’s…part of it.” Tsukauchi straightened, teeth set together, eyes locked on All Might. “Toshinori, you’re in a lot of danger—“

“Yeah I know—“

“No,” Tuskauchi put up a hand, “you’re really in danger. We’ve got moles all around, and almost all of them have reported back with some hints of a plot to kill you. Individuals think they can bag you and grab some cheap, easy fame. Organizations are filled with personal grudges against you. If it were up to me, we’d have 10 professional heroes posted at the door to this room all hours of the day. We just don’t have that kind of manpower to spare.”

“So you keep pestering me instead.”

“That’s the idea.”

All Might opened his eyes, duller now. “If it took All Might to defeat these villains the first time, what makes you think you can stop them? That’s suicide.” Harsher now, with full, accusatory eye-contact. “That’s on my head if you die. Don’t you dare do that to me.”

Tsukauchi stood, patted the side of All Might’s bed. “Also, you’ve got some visitors waiting to see you. They’ve been milling around outside while I wrapped up the interview. I’ll let them in. I’m right outside the door, Toshinori.”

“Naomasa don’t ignore this.”

“Hey kids,” Tsukauchi swung the door open, smiling at whatever lay beyond it. “Think he’s ready to see you now.”

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ladrien is so beautiful because when they see each other at those points, they both see and know that it’s the person that they love, and as they stare at each other they’re both feeling the same thing, but they have no idea. there’s this intense longing on both ends; it’s the extreme on the love spectrum. however, at this point it’s difficult to get to know each other because they’re both so lovestruck.

then there’s marichat, a different side of the spectrum. it’s fascinating because for a while it’s fairly platonic (with, of course, some of chat noir’s flirty charm). however, it’s so beautiful because at this point, neither of them have any idea that they actually like each other, but it gives them an opportunity to get to know the other in a totally different context. chat gets to know the ladybug without the mask but not quite the stuttering, clumsy marinette he knows in school, either. he gets to witness her as being more confident, more sarcastic, more like… ladybug. and then marinette gets to see chat noir when he’s not necessarily in action and making puns all the time (well no okay he’s still gonna be making puns regardless). but still, she gets to focus on what he’s really like without the hype of a battle or a mission on their hands, which shifts ladybug into hyper-responsibility mode (so it’s harder for them to actually talk). she starts to not see chat noir’s jokes as distracting, but maybe actually… a little funny. and sometimes adrien’s little polite, quiet sides emerge now and then, and marinette is mildly surprised at those moments. and not only is marinette getting to know chat noir, but also another side of adrien - the unrepressed side, the adventurous side. and she’s getting used to it to the point where maybe she wouldn’t make chat behave any other way. maybe she starts to enjoy their playful banter, and the way how they just balance each other out.

i think these two types of interactions contrast each other like each one of them contrasts against the other love-wise in their interactions as ladynoir and adrinette, respectively. all of these various relationships not only reveal different sides of the characters to each other (in prep for the ~ultimate reveal~ when everything then [might] make sense) but also mirror the yin and yang force between them. it’s poetic, really.

i freaking love this love square oH MY LORD

anonymous asked:

A DEH tree bros fic where after Connor pushes him instead of just like being shook and then going into waving through a window Evan gets up and follows Connor and asks if he's ok because he knows he's not (because mentally ill people def recognize other mental ill people) ... That was a fic request/suggestion thing. You don't have to write it if you don't want to but if you do that's cool too thanks

Part of me wants to make this a multiple part thing. but I don’t know if anyone would want that from me. Anyway, here you go, thanks for requesting!

This turned into a chapter thing, so: [Chapter 2]

[AO3 version]

It’s anger. No, actually, that’s not quite what Evan sees. Yes, there’s anger there, pushing it’s way out in the “you’re the freak” Connor sends at him. Pushing it’s way out through the shove he sends Evan to the ground with. Yet, that’s not it. It isn’t anger that registers to Evan.


It’s only a second. Between the anxiety that creeps into Evan’s lungs and the cold of the ground, he registers pain in the words. Before he can think- and isn’t that how it always is- he’s stumbling to his feet and through the streams of students flooding the halls to follow Connor.

He’s sick too.

There’s this familiarity that he recognizes. Part of him argues, that he could be wrong. That he’s misunderstanding, that he’s just projecting. Hoping for someone to understand. Still, Evan follows.

A bell rings, signaling students to start heading to their classes, but instead of listening to the part of him that says he should turn around and do just that, he catches up to Connor. It’s only once he’s close enough to speak, that his mind catches up with what he’s actually doing and words catch in his throat.

“Are you okay?” Evan is more startled by his own voice than the snap of Connors gaze from a glare at the path ahead of him, to one at Evan’s face. Instinct has Evan curling in on himself.

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First Moon III (final)

 Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 

Genre: AU werewolf!BTS/Suggestive/Fluff

Jungkook x OC

[Drawing made by the talented @ax-thelian ♥]

The next few weeks went by in an odd atmosphere.

Nothing more had happened that night besides cuddling and kissing, and because of that, Terra thought things were moving forward between the two of them, a sign that they were willing to make things work.

That didn’t seem to be the case for Jungkook.

He grew more and more distant, looking as if he were almost uncomfortable  to be in the same room with her. He always seemed on edge, the smallest contact with her making him run for the hills until he started avoiding her altogether.
At first she thought maybe he needed some space, needed to get accustomed to his newly acquired nature. But, as time went by, his behavior started saddening her more and more.

Did she do something wrong? Did she say something she shouldn’t have? Did he realize that he didn’t want to be with her after all?

These thoughts kept invading her mind, she was trying to pin-point everything she did or said that could have set him off, but she found none. At that point, it made her irritated to be ignored for no reason, and if he wanted to keep playing games like that, he should - no, he HAD to - give her a valid explanation.

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DL: Referring to the Heroine

I was talking to @shadyraisincookie and I thought this would be fun to do. I know @midnightnico is also familiar with the games, and much more familiar with the Japanese than I am so if you wanna chime in too feel free, since I only have knowledge of the songs and the only game I’ve played in the actual Japanese has been Vandead Carnival. Like in my other posts, reblogs are fine, but if you have something to add or say, then just send me an ask or message and don’t add to this post. Thanks :)

So I was listening to Gin no Bara recently and I realized I’d only ever heard Reiji’s and Kanato’s. So I went to give Laito’s a listen, and I almost flipped my shit because instead of ‘anata’ he used ‘omae’ and I thought I was crazy cuz I thought I’d heard Kanato’s and Reiji’s wrong all this time. But no! Kanato and Reiji are the only ones to refer to the heroine as ‘anata’ in their Gin no Bara versions. Everyone else uses ‘omae.’ 

And then I thought, oh this is interesting. 

Especially when we consider the connotations these words hold in the actual Japanese. Because in translations everything always just becomes ‘you’ and loses the attached meanings. So I was like this begs to be talked about. 

Anata, Kimi, and Omae

They’re basically listed in descending order according to…familiarity? I guess is what you could call it? That’s the best way I can describe it at least. 

While anata can be a more formal kind of thing, which is why I think people assume it’s the go-to word for Kanato and Reiji, it’s more so associated with couples. Not quite ‘dear’ but I guess you can think of it like that. I don’t necessarily think Reiji or Kanato see her in this way, but I do think the way they see the heroine from the very beginning is different from the way the other brothers do. While the heroine will of course always be food, I feel that to Reiji and Kanato she also immediately becomes their ‘responsibility’ in a sense. She becomes their property in a way that is not quite like the other boys. Where I think the other boys feel she owes them everything, I find that to Kanato and Reiji, they also feel as though they need to provide her something as well. They look after her, even if its in their own fucked up way, even if its in a condescending way, but more than food she becomes something of theirs that they then have to take care of.  Kanato also often refers to her using her own name, adding the -san honorific, which I think speaks volumes, considering he is acknowledging her for who she really is while simultaneously being respectful.

Ok so now we have ‘kimi.’ Which is like just sort of the default. I feel like most of the boys use it at one point or another. It’s the most natural way to call someone, so I won’t really say much about it, other than they’re comfortable enough to use ‘kimi’ with the heroine instead of like addressing her by name. 

Which leaves ‘omae.’ This one puts the other person at a sort of arm’s length away in terms of familiarity I suppose. It can also come off as very rude if used the wrong way, and I feel like most of the time the boys probably are using it in that context. The one who stands out the most is Subaru just because he’s the one I’ve heard use it the most. So he clearly draws the line between the heroine, and himself. Like I said before, it’s what 4/6 boys use in the Gin no Bara, but that may or may not have more to do with the fact that it fits in the three syllables, and anata might be the wrong vibe (or even out of character) for anyone who isn’t Kanato or Reiji. 

Anta and Kisama

I think it’s Shuu who often uses ‘anta’ which is the rude version of anata and I believe would basically be the equivalent of ‘omae’ but slightly sharper. Shin likes to use this one as well when referring to the heroine. Again, just another way to keep the distance between themselves, and her. They always place themselves as superior. 

Carla we all know uses ‘kisama.’ And I think everyone gets the general idea that it’s not a nice thing to call someone. But I was surprised to learn the meaning as to why. “Kisama” is actually a very formal and respectful thing to call someone, but this person would have to be the emperor or have god-like status. So what “kisama” really is is just a super sarcastic and degrading comment because no one will ever really reach that level, and that’s what makes it so offensive. I don’t think there’s really an English equivalent to this, other than ironically calling someone “your highness” or something like that. But even then I don’t think it carries the same weight as ‘kisama’ does. I think this is particularly fitting for Carla to use, considering he is himself a king and one of the only founders left, so he already sees himself as above everyone else. And I think the fact that someone as simple as a human girl is the key to not only continuing the race but also the cure to his endzeit, no doubt that’s probably incredibly fucking irritating, not to mention frustrating, which is why I think he chooses this very harsh version of ‘you.’ 

Chichinashi, Bitch-chan, Kachiku, and M-Neko-chan

The following I can say with more confidence, because the analysis will remain the same across any language. All of these ‘nicknames’ I guess you could call them, are degrading in their own sense. I know Yuma also tends to call her “Sow” but I’m unaware of what it is he actually calls her in the Japanese so I’ll be omitting it for now. Regardless it’ll be the same sort of analysis as Ruki’s ‘kachiku.’

So Chichinashi, I’m sure most people know by now is literally ‘titless.’ Which is interesting in the context of Ayato. It’s no secret this is his preferred body part, so to define her as someone completely lacking of that feature is to put the heroine in a position that functions only to satisfy a sexual gaze. And with a name like Chichinashi, she doesn’t succeed in even that much. While obviously offensive, it becomes a constant reminder, not just to the Heroine, but to Ayato that because she lacks that which might make her sexually appealing, her only redeeming feature is the quality of her blood, and calling her chichinashi over and over seems to solidify this in Ayato’s head. In a way I feel like this is him convincing himself that he’ll never feel anything towards her, because no matter her personality she is lacking what he has determined to be an ideal feature. It’s his way of putting his walls up, to keep his emotions at an unreachable distance.

Bitch-chan and M-Neko-chan I find to be in the same category. First of all, they both include the ‘chan’ honorific, which can of course come off as flirty, but it’s also the honorific used for small children and women. What’s fucked up about it is that it functions to falsely neutralize the insult because it gives it the appearance as being ‘cute’ or ‘endearing’ when in reality calling someone a bitch or a masochistic cat aren’t really very nice. Both nicknames place the heroine in a position below themselves, arguable far below themselves, considering they’re on the animal spectrum, which already seems to ‘other’ her and again subject her to a single, male gaze. Neko gets a slight pass, considering a ‘cat’ doesn’t have the same negativity attached to it that ‘bitch’ does, but what drives Kou’s nickname home is the “M” he slaps in front of it. As I’m sure everyone knows, it stands for ‘masochist’ which like the ‘chan’ functions to neutralize the insults/abuse. Whatever he subjects to her will be fine, even if it’s painful, since he’s declaring her a masochist, and must therefore “enjoy it” when this is again not the case. To push it further, the masochist is always subject to the sadist, so again, by calling her as such, it reinforces the heroine’s position as beneath that of the boys. 

Kachiku, while still an animal of sorts, is a bit different. Literally livestock, it is not roundabout in the way bitch-chan and m-neko-chan are. It makes it very clear that the heroine is food, that her only purpose is to function as food, and there is this ever-present looming feeling that she could be set up for slaughter, like any other kind of livestock. In her case, it’d probably be equivalent to being drained dry. Rather than placing her beneath him, what Ruki does is put her in a separate category altogether, and much like Ayato’s Chichinashi, it serves more as a reminder to Ruki himself that she will never be his equal. She is meant to be eaten, to be used for his own gain, so it creates a barrier that might stop him from developing feelings for her. 

This is where I’m supposed to put some nice pretty sentence to tie everything all together, but honestly I don’t have that so I’ll just leave it at this haha. Just me doing some thinking. Hope I could give you all some food for thought~

concept: fitzsimmons grow old together, but they don’t explain very much about their past as secret agents which makes them adorable but a little eccentric. 

sometimes at reunions and holidays they’re so cute and in love that they get asked how they met and they start fitzsimmonsing about how they met in school when they were two young prodigies. and how they were clueless lab partners. and fitz will insist he was in love with her the whole time since they met. then Jemma will say it took him long enough to tell her. And he’ll say he had to figure it out first and then work up the courage to actually tell her. but she’ll say he was nothing but brave when he finally did. And then she’ll say it took her a while to realize she loved him back and by then she was scared she’d lost him. and they’re just talking about when they were young and falling in love… and they completely leave out the whole part about being shield agents. 

and whenever they directly reference something they don’t actually give any context. so their kid(s?) and grandkids are constantly confused and bemused at family reunions when Fitz will interrupt Jemma’s story about how “he would have waited around forever” to defend his slowness with, “Well darling, that was after you had just come back to earth, and I was just glad you were alive. I wasn’t gonna ruin that with all those pesky feelings when I had just gotten you back.” and everyone will think, “Wait is that a metaphor? what do you mean, she came back to earth?” and if someone asks Fitz simply says “Oh Jemma took a little trip to space to get out of going to dinner with me.” and Jemma, who doesn’t actually want to explain, just smiles and pats his shoulder or squeezes his hand as if that’s a perfectly acceptable answer and adds under her breath, “You know I would never want to get away from you, dear.”

Then later Fitz will sacrificially give her the last piece of pie “Take it, Jemma.” And Jemma will roll her eyes and say something like, “Oh, Fitz, don’t be so dramatic! It’s not like we’re trapped under the ocean and you’re giving me the last of the oxygen. We can split the pie.” and people will think she’s just a little creative with her expressions. 

Their past becomes an inside joke of sorts. Not really a joke, but something personal that they’ve embraced and learned to live with… but something they’ve almost fictionalized or turned into myth as a way of not flaunting the truth or glorifying the past… and as a way of keeping people from seeing them differently. People might wonder what on earth Fitzsimmons are talking about, but they always dismiss it. At the least they figure it’s all just teasing, at most they figure they had a little bit of a rocky past that they mask with embellishments so they don’t have to talk about it too much.

So people just think they have this made up way of talking to each other because they can’t actually believe any of it’s literal when Fitz says things like “Hey, if I jumped through a hole in the universe twice, I think I can handle this.” 

Also no one knows how Aunt Daisy came to be Aunt Daisy, but they don’t question it. She is mysterious Aunt Daisy who seems like she is always hiding a secret when pops up at gatherings. She gushes and teases and makes awkward jokes then disappears.

After they pass in their sleep together on their 70th anniversary, the truth comes out… they’re honored by shield and all the stories are told and it all makes sense and everyone has to pick their jaws up off the floor.

anonymous asked:

saw your post mentioning the potential length of their relationship and it really is something. it all seems fairytale esque for them to be together so long and I really hope the best for them. i really hope in 20 years I get to see them in interviews like.... we've been together for near 30 years and we can't wait for 30 more....

I think for me, as someone who is borderline monogamously challenged, it is almost unfathomable that you could meet someone at 16 and 18 and stay with them forever. I was still a virgin who had never had a boyfriend at both 16 and 18, so if someone told me this story without any context I’d be like

I had friends who were divorced by the time they were 24 so maybe I’m just cynical about relationships, but goddamn it when I see Harry and Louis look at each other I’m like 

When I first started getting into One Direction I didn’t even have a Tumblr, I’d just go to Tumblr and search “larry stylinson” to see what was going on. I was like, “If I don’t make an account then I can’t technically be called obsessed.”

But we all know how well that worked out. I think actually at that point I had an account but never really used it, so then I was like, “Well if I don’t post about Larry then no one will know how much time I spend looking at posts about Larry.”

Again, that just…didn’t happen. But I’m glad it did eventually! I’ve met some of my best friends through Tumblr, so it’s all good. 

Uhhhhh I think I was talking about Larry at some point…oh yeah! So when I first started to really fall down the Larry rabbit hole I did genuinely consider all the possibilities. My best friend and I growing up used to be asked all the time if we were dating but we were just hetero lifemates, well I say “lifemates” but we ain’t friends no mo so like “half of our life-mates”…another reason I’m like, “I just don’t know if people are meant to be with the same person for their entire life.” 

However, I have been doing a lot of research about this kind of thing for my book (which you can pre-order now on by the way), and looked into Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love in which he says that love is comprised of three elements. 

Intimacy is basically friendship…so do you get along with the person? Do you want to tell them everything all the time? Do you genuinely enjoy being together?

Passion and infatuation is sexual chemistry

And commitment is the part that I don’t understand because I’ve never been able choose a relationship over myself. I have had deep intimacy and passion with people but when it came to choosing to commit to altering our life plans to accommodate one another, it’s just never happened. I lived in five countries in one year, the fifth being California (which should be its own country really), and whilst I was extremely fortunate to be able to do that, there is no way I could have asked someone else to drop everything whenever I decide I’m bored and want to move every three months. 

However…the amount of proof that Louis and Harry are continually choosing each other is quite prevalent all over their goddamn bodies. 

Seriously, anyone who looks at a video of themselves and their partner like this after five years is probably doing okay 

They’re literally as subtle as a shark attack when it comes to each other, so people dismissing it because Dan fucking Wootton told them to is just silly to me. 

I can see how, if you were to only know about Harry and Louis through the media, you might certainly believe that they were just two bros chillin in a hot tub five feet apart cos they’re not gay. But if you are invested in this fandom and have all of this information at your disposal, I don’t particularly understand how one can completely ignore inconvenient things like tattoos or the bears. 

What I did when first trying to figure out what the hell was going on was to say, “Okay if Larry is real that what doesn’t make sense?” And basically the only thing that didn’t make sense was their media images and narrative.

When I did the same by going, “Okay if Larry is not real then what doesn’t make sense here?” And you could write a novel of things that don’t add up. #welivetogetherdealwith it; “my son returns to his husband today”; next to you/you can’t sit together, WELLINGTON, tattoos, rbb and sbb, “larry ok”, bee tattoo, the two week rule, Jamaica, “Always in my heart @Harry_Styles yours sincerely louis”…

I was like 

So yeah, I’m able to see beyond my own relationship incapabilities to recognise that they husbands. 

anonymous asked:

I know you may have gotten this before or get this a lot anyway but how hard is it to create a myth/new religion/god(s)? What is the basis for a religion with mythical beasts and the like? I'm trying to write a story centered around a fictional small religion and am kind of confused when referencing other small religions. Thanks for running this blog btw! It's been an extremely helpful reference~! <3

Hello Nonnie, 

Our answer for this one is courtesy of Dave, a writer and a friend of one of our chorus members:

I’m going to give you an answer that sounds like a complete and utter cop-out, and it sort of is but bear with me. It Depends. And it does. It depends on quite a few things. But it mainly depends on how…let’s say “realistic” you want this religion or mythology to be.

What you can do is just toss out ideas and string them together: the names of gods, what they’re the gods of, whether or not a particular god is a complete dick or not. Boom. Easy. Simple. Boring. Bland. You want to make a fictitious religion or mythology that isn’t that? You’re going to need to ask yourself a few questions.

The first question is “what is the purpose of this mythology?” Back when I was in college (just over a year ago, now; how time flies), I took an elective my final semester: the Anthropology of Religion. It was not quite what I was expecting (I was hoping for more discussion on world religions, an analysis of their tenets and how they relate to the modern world, that sort of thing), but I still found it fascinating. And the one thing that I really took away from it was what the purpose of religion is, anthropologically-speaking: religions exist to make sense of a world that probably doesn’t have any sense to it. That is the purpose of religion, in broad strokes: making a crazy world a little more sane.

But I’m rambling.

I’m not talking about why this mythology exists in-context; when you ask yourself “what is the purpose of this mythology,” you need to think about the meta-context, the context you’ll be using it in. Is it for your tumblr roleplay blog? Are you writing a novel? Coming up with a setting for your D&D campaign you DM on Saturday nights? The reason you’re creating this mythology is going to, in part, determine how much detail (and thusly how much work) you need to put into it. Let’s look at each of the possibilities I mentioned above.

Let’s say you’re creating a tumblr roleplay blog for a character who is, oh… a generic fantasy dwarf. Short, taciturn, unhealthy lust for gold and gems, The Beard, whole nine yards; you want to detail your dwarf’s religious beliefs. In this case, broad strokes might be best; there’s little need to sit down and write out the entire mythology beyond the most general details, at least at first. In this case, you’d have the luxury of time, and you can expand on your basic foundation as you roleplay, adding new elements as time goes on.

If you’re DMing a D&D campaign, you might need to do a little more work. Here, detailing each god in a pantheon and their relationships to each other (and deities outside of that pantheon) are probably more important than in the prior example. You might want to detail the more temporal side of things: how religious rites and ceremonies are conducted, church hierarchies, etc. You still don’t need to write an entire holy text yourself (unless that’s your thing; more power to you if it is), but you should keep in mind that while the broad strokes are fine at first, your players WILL want to know more details, especially if they happen to have a character who is a cleric or a paladin or otherwise has important and deeply-held religious beliefs. I speak from experience here. Luckily, you can get your players to do some of the work for you. Have them make up details, scripture, customs, etc. They’ll get more invested in their character, in your campaign, and in your world.

But suppose you’re an aspiring novelist trying to crank out a best-selling fantasy novel about dwarves and their gods. Well, this is where you really have your work cut out for you. Broad strokes may work best at first, but like the players of a D&D campaign, your readers will want to know more, and unlike in a D&D campaign you can’t get them to fill in the blanks for you. You’re going to need to do all the explaining, all of the details, all of the work here.

The next question you should consider is that of your setting. What sort of world are you creating this mythology for? If it’s a fantasy setting, chances are you’re going to want a detailed mythology as religion is a prominent element of many fantasy settings (even the lower-fantasy ones; look at how important religion is the George R.R. Martin’s “A Song of Ice and Fire”).

Is it Earth, perhaps a modern-fantasy setting akin to “The Dresden Files” or “American Gods”? You may want to be careful with creating a new mythology with a setting like that, as you’ll have to account for why all these other religious beliefs are (presumably) false and yours is (presumably) correct (unless they’re ALL true, but that’s a different matter entirely). Not to mention you have to consider why your mythology is (probably) not the dominant one on Earth.

Is it a science-fiction setting? That seems like a curious choice, but consider Frank Herbert’s “Dune”. It is, at its heart, a sci-fi epic, and religion plays a major part in it. Indeed, I would say that “Dune” is probably the best example as to how to write a believable fictional religion.

The setting you’re writing a mythology for and the purpose behind your creation of this mythology are both important factors that decide the level of detail you’re going to want to use. And you get these details by adding myths to that mythology. Mythologies are made up of myths. Crazy, right? And all myths really are, are stories. Lemminkäinen drowning in the river of Tuonela. God parting the Red Sea so the children of Israel could cross it. Zeus turning himself into a swan and seducing Leda (as a swan; I swear I’m not making this up). That one time that Mjölnir was stolen by the giant Þrymr, so Thor had to disguise himself as Freyja to recover it and almost married Þrymr (I’m not making this up either). Brahma beginning in nothingness and, by thought alone, creating waters, into which he deposited his semen, which created a golden egg which Brahma was born from (This one takes the freakin’ cake).

Myths are stories that explain the world from a culture’s viewpoint, stories that explain a culture’s customs and beliefs. Consider the Þrymskviða, that aforementioned story about Thor crossdressing and reclaiming his stolen hammer. It reveals that Norse culture was violent (the story ends with Thor getting his hands on Mjölnir and killing Þrymr and everyone else at the wedding), their sense of humor (nobody realizes that “Freyja” is obviously a man), their value of community and cooperation (the entire plan is Loki’s idea in the first place and his continued aid is the only thing that allows it to succeed) and the Norse idea of justice (Þrymr stole Mjölnir, so he has to die). It is not enough to simply know that two gods in a pantheon hate each other; there has to be a reason why, a reason that reveals something about the people who believe this mythology to be true.

This is a fairly nuanced and intricate topic, but that’s the long and short of it. Is it hard to create a mythology? Not particularly, really. But creating one that is believable, one that makes sense no matter how outlandish or bizarre it might be? That takes thought and effort. Like so many other things in life, what you get out of such a project is what you put into it.

But hey, that’s just my opinion.

-Super Special Guest Dave

In honor of SPEAK YOUR LANGUAGE DAY post here five to ten the best things / facts about any language you can speak ( preferably fluently ) ! If you are more than bilingual choose only 1 of your languages.

Reblog or repost, it’s up to you !

Tagged by: Myself, I made this meme ! :3
Tagging: All of my followers ! Anyone, everyone ! Tagging @maarhun & @littlestmun specifically though, because they are Finnish too :D Fill in the caps I might’ve left !

My language: Finnish ( native, fluent ).

1) I love how free Finnish language is but at the same time really hard to learn if you’re studying it as a foreigner. You can basically cut a word in half ( both writing & speaking ) & it’ll still make the same sense as it would if it was complete. Same thing the order of the words, you can put them in any weird order you want but it’ll still make sense. Finnish is pretty much hard core Yoda speak… In some languages word orders are more or less locked ( subject, verb, object, place, time, manner etc. ) but in Finnish you literally can just throw the words there in any order you want & it’s okay.

2) Literally NO ONE speaks the standard language. NO ONE. Speaking standard language is considered very snobby. I like how people don’t use it. I love the literal “freedom of speech”, referring to number 1 :p

3)  Every single region & city has its own dialect in some way ( referring to number 1 ) & if you live in Finland as a foreigner or immigrant, hoo boy you’re gonna have some real trouble when you go from city to city but even as a native you’re still going to have problems. Once you get used to certain place’s dialect you can might be totally lost in some other. & I’m not talking about words that are kinda the same but still different, no, I am talking about completely & utterly different words you have never heard of that mean the same. Like “bussi” & “dösä”, both mean bus… Or “koti” & “hima”, both mean home. In a country populated by only 5 million people it sometimes baffles me there can be this much language difference all over the country. Hmm. o-o I like the variety though !

4) Let’s not even talk about conjugation of Finnish… You can google it yourselves, the list is so ridiculously long this will take 5-10 scrolls down depending how big your monitor is to read them all.

4) Finnish word “nonii / noniin” can mean dozens of things depending on your tone & how you pronounce it & in which context you use it. I’m not even joking.

5) Word “kahe”is my favourite word but doesn’t mean anything… I also don’t know if literally anyone else uses it except people from Western Ostrobothnia ( small area on the Western coast of Finland ). The best way do describe it is that it means “like” as a filler in sentences, but it still quite isn’t like “like”…

6) Much like German, Finnish too has some ridiculously long words… We’re a heaven for compound words. We pretty squeeze everything relevant to one big fat word ( referring to number 1 — subject, verb, object, place, time, manner etc. )… Or maybe not even that, sometimes ONLY our nouns are this long: “ennakkoäänestyspaikkakunta”, “kuumailmapallolentolahjakortti” or “vuorovarausraivausratkaisupäällikkö”. Yeah… & there aren’t the bullshit “longest Finnish words” you find all over the internet that seriously NO ONE uses. The ones I wrote are seriously words you would use, just not very commonly. They’re very subject & situation specific.

7) SWEARING ! Talking about heaven we are a heaven to swearing too. We swear so much… & some swear words translate hilariously. Here is a massive list of my favourite swears in Finnish.

“Kyrpä otsassa / ohtassa / ottassa” = “dick in your forehead”, which means someone’s having a pouty & angry expression. “Naama norsun vitulla / naama ku norsun vittulla” = “face as an elephant’s twat / face like an elephant’s twat” means the same as “kyrpä ottassa”.
“Vittulan väki” = “the folk of cunt village” which means that in general something sucks. “Vituttaa niinku pientä oravaa, jonka käpy on jäässä” = “As pissed off as a squirrel whose pine cone is frozen.” Self-explanatory :p
“Vitulla päähän” = “cunt to the head” which kinda means the same as extreme face palm.
“Helvetin / helevetin perse” = “Hell’s ass”, means that something’s going seriously wrong.
“Voi hevonvittu” = “Oh the horse cunt”, something goes seriously wrong.
“Voi pyhä persesuti” = “Oh the holy ass brush”. Refers to pubic hair which is considered more or less nasty.
“Ihmispaska / ihmisperse” = “Human shit / ass”. Describes itself well, means that someone is a horrible person.

8) Last but not the least: “Kokko, kokoo koko kokko kokoon” & “Vihdoin vihdoin vihdoin” are legit Finnish sentences. Also, sentence “kuusi palaa” means ( buckle the fuck up folks ):  The spruce is on fire. The spruce returns. The number six is on fire. The number six returns. Six of them are on fire. Six of them return. Your moon is on fire. Your moon returns. & Six pieces.

Personal bonus from me: this video from 0:59 to 3:38.

[ I’m preeeetty sure I forgot so many relevant things from here that I wanted to say but whatever :’D ]

anonymous asked:

:0 can you do one where it's like the MC came from america and they all tease her but then (drumroll) SHES ALSO SOUTHERN and has SUCH a drawl and ofc the classic weird southern phrases or pet names and country music n lame stuff like that (pls help my poor georgia born heart) (my accent has killed so many ppl) love u long time

I’m not very Southern tbh but I was born and raised in FL. It’s such an… interesting place to live… The food here is hella good though, for the most part. My blood is practically sweet tea.

-He noticed your accent instantly. I mean who wouldn’t?
-Once he was being gullible to Seven’s pranks and all you said was “Yoosung… bless your heart.”
-He thought it was a compliment.
-Oh Yoosung you have so much to learn
-You should teach him some southern recipes. Please. He is so interested in what southern food tastes like.
-When he finally does try it, it’s so different from what he usually eats, but it’s a pleasant different.
-He finds himself wanting more afterwards.
-You both tend to enjoy making southern dinner together now.
-He finds it entertaining.
-as long as you don’t play country music while you cook

-Even with a southern drawl, he loves your voice. You know why? Because it’s the voice of the love of his life, so of course it’s gorgeous~
-Music to his ears~
-Speaking of music…
-He hates to be judgmental, especially when it involves you… but he doesn’t like country music.
-He can appreciate some aspects of it because it’s music and music is an art, but he can’t get over how it sounds.
-Also, he’s interested in how life in the south is.
-Please tell him stories about the south. He’d love it so much. He just wants to everything about you, and this is obviously a big part of you.
-Anyone that picks on you will be fought.

-She actually finds the way you talk incredibly adorable.
-Besides, you’re presence alone is calming to Jaehee, so she’d love your voice no matter what it sounded like.
-On occasion, you’ll play a song she actually finds herself enjoying.
-It’s typically country songs that are borderline pop songs but oh well.
-When you call her “sweet pea” she feels blessed.
-But you also call everyone you talk to “sweetie” or “baby” or “sweetheart”
-Umm??? I thought I was your baby????
-You explain that where you come from, it’s normal for people to call each other that, especially women.
-She’ll get over it.

-He’s always known the stereotype of American Southerners™ but you’re obviously not uneducated and uncivilized like the stereotypes make you out to be.
-He doesn’t like country music. He much prefers classical music over the stuff you listen to that doesn’t make any sense to him whatsoever.
-But, if it’s what you like, he’s going to deal with it and listen to it to make you happy.
-The only time he’ll willingly listen to country is if you’re the one performing.
-Unless it’s you, he doesn’t care for it.
-One day you suggest cooking dinner for him so he can try how you lived back in the south.
-He tries it and calls it commoner food appreciates your hard work. It was obviously made with more love than his usual food.
-Doesn’t mean he wants to eat it again though it’s too much for him

-You are the target of so many jokes.
-Bless your heart.
-He puts on a fake accent all the time to mimic you.
-His impression is spot on, you hate to admit.
-He’s the kind of person to get offended when you call PhD Pepper “Coke”.
-It is not “Coke”, it is the nectar of the Gods, _____.
-stfu Saeyoung
-He quotes country songs out of context at inappropriate times too.
-If anyone other than him makes fun of you though he gets super defensive.
-Only he is allowed to talk like a redneck and sing Florida Georgia Line in front of you.
-He calls you southern nicknames, in English too. He thinks it’s teasing, but you actually love when he calls you that.

-He thinks your accent is cute and endearing, especially when you talk in English.
-Country isn’t his kind of thing, but if you want to listen to it, of course he’ll allow it.
-He might not like the songs you play, but he can’t bring himself to hate something you like so much.
-He can tolerate it since it makes you happy.
-V enjoys when you teach him more about what it was like growing up in the south, the good and the bad stories.
-It helps him understand you on another level, which is all he really wants in life.
-He’s not a fan of southern food, but he is willing to try it if you wanted him to.
-Literally so open to anything you bring up.

-Your accent had no affect on him.
-Like he obviously noticed it but he didn’t really notice it.
-“_____ has such a thick southern accent.”
-“They do?”
-“…Oh. I guess they do.”
-He doesn’t like country music and he isn’t afraid to express that.
-Sometimes, though, he’ll tolerate it to make you happy. He’ll just be pouting the whole time.
-He of course knows nothing about the south but he’s okay with learning.
-I mean, if it’s about you, he’s willing to listen.
-He wants to know you better anyway.
-From your stories, it’s much different where you’re from compared to Korea. It does capture his attention.
-You can tell he’s listening because he even asks questions for you to elaborate on.
-He probably won’t admit it, but he enjoys learning more about you.

P.S. I hope you read this post in a southern accent because I was thinking in a southern accent while I wrote this.