these men omg

anonymous asked:

OOOOH OKAY! What about Cor with a super girly princess-y daughter with absolutely no interest in fighting??? What about the BROS?! *Prompto at tea time!!!* :'D You know he'd be the first one to slip on a tutu and sip tea with his princess daughter! *loves*

Haha, I love this! Okay- short drabble time :D (Cor’s is the longest because I had to set the scene haha). Also, all these baby girls are below the age of 14 so they are all quite young and adorable still. Feel free to send in another request if you’d like older!daughters interacting with their dads :D

Cor: When Cor’s partner falls pregnant, everyone in the Crownsguard just assumes that it’s within the world’s natural order that Cor should have a son. You know, so that he could be Cor’s living legacy once the ‘Immortal’ is finally proved mortal. Even when Cor discreetly starts flashing around baby pictures of his precious little girl, the palace staff, Crownsguard, and even the Kingsglaive all decide that- yes, Cor’s little girl is going to be a powerful, headstrong young warrior woman.

However, one day when Cor brings his six year old girl with him to the Citadel, everyone is rendered absolutely speechless. Cor is holding the hand of a tiny girl, whose head comes barely past his knee, and this little girl is decked out in various shades of pinks and light purples. She’s wearing a frilly pink skirt and a purple button-up blouse with black leggings. Her shoes are shiny little mary janes and her long brown hair falls in perfect waves down her back.

She’s brought to the Crownsguard training room, as Cor needs to run through a few combat drills with his pupils. He helps his daughter settle down on a nearby bench where he can keep an eye on her, and makes her promise that she won’t wander off. She plants a kiss on his stubbly cheek and pinky promises with the Crownsguard marshal that, yes, she will be a good girl and that, yes, she will stay put and play with her dolls on the bench.

As Cor presses a swift kiss to his precious daughter’s forehead, a few of the younger Crownsguard have a chuckle at the expense of their marshal. No one had expected Cor to be such a doting father. Any residual mirth within the training room is put to rest when Cor begins the drills. The harsh, metallic clashes of weaponry ring harshly throughout the echo-prone room. Grunts and gasps of exertion are commonplace and the occasional pained yell from a stray hit by a real weapon isn’t unheard of. That’s what training was for.

Cor is transported into another plane of existence when he fights- he loves the feeling of his blood rushing through his veins, the thrill of blocking and parrying an oncoming attack that could potentially be the end of him… He even loves the painful and proud feelings he experiences when one of the younger Crownsguard manages to land a hard blow on his shoulder. There is hope for this lot yet. Cor lets out a small grunt of pain before lashing out with his katana at the young man, only to freeze as a familiar distressed cry reaches his ears.

“CEASE!” Cor shouts immediately, and all movement is terminated within the room with a scary aura of discipline. Cor whirls around so that he’s facing his daughter, and his heart breaks a little at how she’s clasping tightly onto the edges of her skirt, her breath hitching terribly frequently as her chest rises and falls with each shallow breath she takes. Cor immediately rushes over to his distressed daughter and whisks her shaking form into his strong embrace. “What’s wrong angel?” Cor’s stern demeanour has completely flipped and everyone around the father and daughter are extremely confused.

Cor’s little girl sniffles and snuggles into her father’s chest, throwing her skinny arms around his sweaty neck. “Everyone’s fighting! I’m scared!” Cor sighs and presses another kiss to his daughter’s cheek and sways her back and forth in his arms in an attempt to calm his little angel down.

Cor is absolutely sure now that his little girl will probably never touch a katana. He’s can’t say he’s disappointed in that fact though.

At least she’ll be safe from the horrors of the battlefield.

Noctis: Noctis is low-key over the moon that his baby princess wants nothing to do with the toy swords that Gladio bought her on her third birthday. Noctis’ s/o does insist that their daughter receives some self-defence training, but it’s clear that Noctis’ daughter abhors every second of it. She comes home in tears after each and every one of her weekly lessons with Gladio- though Gladio insists that he wasn’t pushing her anywhere near as hard as he used to push Noct.

On the days where Noctis’ sweet princess does complete her self-defence training, she has a hard time falling asleep. Noctis worries about this because… shouldn’t it work the other way around? The kid should be tired after a tiring day, so she should fall asleep the instant her head hits the pillow… right? That’s not the case here- Noctis’ daughter is almost always kept up by nightmares usually pertaining to being injured by a monster, or not being able to help her mummy or daddy during a tough fight for survival.

These terrible nightmares persist even into her early teenage years, and Noctis always makes sure to leave his bedroom door slightly ajar. He and his s/o make sure that on the days their daughter has training, they do not try to do anything… unbecoming, in case they unwittingly scare their daughter even further. On nights where Noctis’ daughter quietly sneaks into their room, she knows that her father’s conveniently fallen asleep in the centre of the large bed, leaving her plenty of room to snuggle into her father’s side.

Being the deep sleeper he is, Noctis never wakes up at the slight movements, but during the course of the night, he does find himself draping a protective arm over his daughter’s back. Noctis’ s/o has taken many pictures of the close father and daughter, laying asleep side-by-side… both fast asleep like the princesses they both are.

Prompto: Prompto’s s/o is beginning to think that their boyfriend is a little too ready to indulge their baby girl in whatever she desires. She wants a new doll? Prompto’s driving off to the toy store in a jiffy, calling Noctis to ask him whether his god-daughter wants a doll too (because he can’t treat his daughter differently to his god-daughter- they’re equally loved by this sunshine man).

Baby Argentum wants some sweets? Prompto ends up at Ignis’ door step 5:30 am, sweaty from his regular morning run and pleading with his clear blue eyes until Ignis relents and whips up a quick batch of naturally sweet, yet healthy breakfast muffins. Ignis’ prim and proper daughter secretly loves it when Prompto wakes the entire household up so early in the morning- she enjoys sweets just as much as the next kid!

And by the Six, when Prompto’s little girl wants to play princess tea party with her three god-sisters… Prompto is so ready to take on the role of presiding Queen of the Tea Party. He even lets the girls dress him in the most obnoxious pink tutu skirt one could ever hope to find. Letting the girls finish the look with haphazardly painted red lips and a copious amount of pink blush, Prompto hardly cares that Noctis, Ignis and Gladio stand as FAR AWAY AS POSSIBLE from the tea party shenanigans whilst judging him. Hard.

This sunshine man will do anything for his girl, and all his bro’s girls too, because he loves them an incredible amount. And he absolutely, positively supports his baby 100% when she outright refuses to hold a gun in her hand. That means that he can be her hero, and have an excuse to protect his little girl forever.

Gladio: Gladio’s upset at first when he realises that his baby girl is averse to fighting and learning about combat. He does manage to convince her to learn how to protect herself in the face of unexpected adversity, but those light hearted lessons usually end in tears. Feeling guilty, Gladiolus Amicitia would do ANYTHING to see his baby girl smile again. And so, whilst swearing his baby girl to secrecy, he lets his seven year old braid his hair.

Over and over and over again. (Gladio’s s/o has pictures of Gladio’s haphazard braids, but he doesn’t know that *winky face*).

Gladiolus absolutely HAS to take a picture of his baby girl’s daily outfits. He adores the fact that she loves bright, happy colours, and the fact that she proudly wears her weekly favourite colour coordinated with the traditional blacks and greys of the Lucian culture. If at any point in time, his daughter’s clothes need mending, he immediately commissions Ignis to patch up his daughter’s favourite clothes. Ignis usually takes the opportunity to patch up his own daughter’s clothes as well.

One very endearing habit Gladio has formed has everything to do with keeping close to his daughter, no matter the time or place. Gladio sleeps best when his daughter is snoring softly atop his chest. Gladio’s s/o always jests that their daughter has inherited Gladio’s snoring, but Gladio finds everything to do with his tiny, pretty daughter absolutely adorable.

Gladio low-key panics when his daughter is nowhere in sight- so when it does eventually come time for his daughter to start attending school with the rest of his god-daughters, Gladio is actually the most distraught out of all the chocobros. The way Gladio takes his daughter up into his arms, even when she eventually grows into a young lady, is absolutely heart-warming.

The way the father and daughter pair smile at each other after a few hours apart could melt even the coldest of hearts.

Ignis: Ignis’ daughter is prim and proper. She always has her hair in a braid, with a wispy side fringe framing her stunning face. Her moss green eyes are filled with intelligence, even at a young age, and she absolutely cannot leave the house unless she’s decked out in a plaid skirt, black stockings and a prettily embroided jacket or pullover. Despite his inability to see, Ignis has suffered through many finger pricks to perfect his little girl’s choice clothing.

Ignis is in charge of many things around the household, but his s/o MUST be the one to do their daughter’s hair. Once, Ignis had tried, and the whole ordeal ended in tears. Apparently, he had done a very poor job at braiding his girl’s long straight tawny brown hair, and her god sisters had made fun of her all day. Feeling sorry for the whole ordeal, Ignis cancelled all of his attendances to meetings and simply rocked his precious daughter in his favourite chair begging for forgiveness as she sniffled quietly into her papa’s chest.

Ignis, like Noctis and Gladio, insists on self-defence training for his daughter. But then he withdraws her from the program completely after a year, when she develops bed wetting tendencies from the nightmares she has about fighting. Ignis’ s/o feels like Ignis coddles their daughter way too much, but Ignis will hear none of it as he cradles his daughter’s distraught and tired body against his during the night, stroking her back gently to lull her into a peaceful sleep.

His daughter is his kitchen assistant. He will usually ask his baby girl to use the plastic peeler to remove the skins off of potatoes and various vegetables. He will hold his daughter in his arms as he stirs his meals expertly, rattling off cooking tips and tricks while she hums in amazement at how much her smart papa knows.

Ignis is self-sufficient and enjoys his independence. He doesn’t like it when people coddle him or try to mother him. But when his daughter offers to tidy up the kitchen after cooking a meal, or offers to read him a children’s book, or even offers to help him cross the road- he lets her do exactly as she wishes. He likes to tell the other chocobros that it is because he wants his girl to grow into a responsible and caring woman- but deep down he just wants to be the man his girl drops everything for until she outgrows him and starts to prioritise some unknown young man’s whims over his own fatherly wishes.

smh as things that people I know have done in college
  • Bitty: messaged entire class facebook group of several thousand students to ask if anyone had an egg they could borrow to bake a cake
  • Jack: had an anxiety attack, forgot the english language, had to explain the anxiety attack using only french
  • Lardo: got a job at the art museum on campus, had to sit next to an exhibit that contained 200,000 fortune cookies, watched as 200,000 fortune cookies became 199,999 as someone walked up to the pile and stepped on one
  • Holster: spent an hour stuffed under a twin sized bed with 3 other people to jump out and surprise roommate when they got home; roommate never came
  • Ransom: while stoned, planned a 4-year graduation plan that would allow them to complete 5 different majors and a minor; thought this was reasonable to do, probably could do it with a 4.0
  • Nursey: got very drunk and wrote a poem about space, taped the poem to a wall for everyone to see, realized the next morning that most of it was quotes from an Owl City song
  • Dex: was asked to fix the same person's laptop four times in one week; did it every time
  • Chowder: overdressed in an ironed button down and new sweater to go out with his entire squad to meet one guy's girlfriend because he wanted to make a good first impression
  • Tango: spent several entire lectures asking questions about information that is quite literally on the home page of the school's website
  • Whiskey: stolen fruit, several bags of bagels, a set of silverware, and an entire napkin dispenser from the dining hall
  • Shitty: dressed up as Jesus to go to a frat party, went around saying "whoever said 'fuck the gays' is dumb as SHIT"
  • Also Shitty: got alcohol poisoning before 9pm
  • Shitty again: had a foursome while the Hamilton soundtrack played
  • Listen, the next five dudes you're going to ask about? Were probably all Shitty: walked around the quad in a t-rex costume chasing people

So, when Jack suggests buying Bitty a new oven for his birthday, Ransom says that “Excel says we owe him, like, 3 ovens.” and then they do end up buying him an oven for his birthday. But that still leaves 2 ovens that the Samwell Men’s Hockey team owes Bitty. 

Now, imagine it’s a few years down the road and Bitty is trying to start his own bakery but is a little tight on cash because “Even though you can buy me my bakery Mr. Zimmermann, that doesn’t mean you should”. The Samwell crew wants to help out, but they know Bitty won’t just let them give him the money. As they’re trying to figure out what to do about that, Ransom stumbles upon his old spreadsheets and they know exactly how to help Bitty get started. Bitty sheds many tears when he sees the industrial grade ovens installed in his little shop.

SMH as things my mother has said/done

lardo: was a big fake straight beard for her gay friends

jack: “huh, I’ve never heard Justin Bieber before”

bitty: “it’s just not the same with jam, but I can’t find any good preserves”

ransom: refuses to give up foreign citizenship because (s)he is Not American and refuses to associate with that whole mess

holster: has watched 90% of the tv shows on netflix twice, even the ones she hates

dex: “I’m not sure what it was about her, but every time I saw her face, I just wanted to punch it”

nursey: casually called to say “don’t freak out but i’m in the hospital”. twice.

shitty: constantly says “fucking white people”- is white

Bonus Kent, since there’s no Chowder (that sunshine boy is literally the opposite of my mom):
“I had a boyfriend once who had a jaguar. The animal, not the car.”

Channeling my inner Bitty and making brownies at 3am has led me to the following hcs;

  • Bitty actually despises making upside down cakes, because for some reason they always fall. Always. No matter what. Why the fuck won’t they stop falling?!
  • Nursey sneaks into the Haus to escape his roommates. They are the Actual Worst and if he has to spend longer than a couple minutes with them he will murder
    • That being said, his roommates are a Therapy and Education major respectively, both of them are also incredible fuckos
    • Like seriously if you’re going to school to be in a profession where you teach/mentor/help people you should WANT to do that
    • Nursey wants to constantly punch both of his roommates simultaneously
    • Dex and Chowder have offered to help murder them for him
    • He’s considered it twice
  • Dex has never actually seen one of his roommates
    • The guy is never there. Never. 
    • Dex always hears that he’s come by the dorm and that he’s just missed them but Dex is almost positive his other two roommates are fucking with him
    • Like seriously
  • Chowder has been the mastermind behind several pranks
    • He still has not told Bitty who switched his icing for mashed potatoes
    • Or who helped move Bitty down onto the Haus couch in the middle of the night
      • Ransom and Holster went pieless for a week from that one
  • Speaking of, Ransom has to actively avoid the entirety of the Bio club
    • Like seriously, “oh my god is that them quick jump into the pond and hide”
    • He cannot let them find him
    • He will not be tricked into becoming president again
    • For the third year in a row
  • Holster got locked in the library once. Don’t ask him how.
  • Alternatively, Jack got locked in his and Shitty’s bathroom once, when it was their bathroom. He has sworn Shitty to silence.
  • Lardo got an easy bake oven as a gag gift from her siblings once
    • She brought it to the Haus and somehow convinced the others (Dex) to make sure Bitty could only use it (the easy bake) for an entire day
    • Bitty was not amused
    • He made it work
  • Shitty will not speak of Pride 2014. He Will Not.
  • Tango will get dead fucking serious if you refer to him as Tony the Tiger and ask you, with the straightest fucking face, who Tony the Tiger is and make you extremely fucking uncomfortable
    • When asked by the team why he does this he simply replies, cheerily, “Well why not!”
    • Someone convinces LAX bros to do it all the fucking time
  • Whiskey pretends to dislike team bonding but secretly he enjoys it a little too much

There was a post for the Avengers that basically said ‘the team got hit with a magic spell and reverted back to their first language’ which I can no longer find, but, Imagine something happened that makes the SMH team speak in their first language. Featuring

  • Jack speaking Quebecois French
  • Shitty speaking Polish
  • Lardo speaking Vietnamese 
  • Ransom speaking Yoruba
  • Holster speaking Hebrew (Ransom and Holster are still able to finish each other’s sentences, even though they don’t actually know what each other are saying)
  • Nursey speaking Ariabic
  • Dex speaking Irish or Gaelic
  • Chowder speaking Cantonese Chinese
  • Whiskey and Tango speaking different Spanish dialects
  • and Bitty the poor sap who still speaks English and has to try and figure out how to fix it before their upcoming game.

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