these are the biggest idiots

British Day (Alexander Hamilton x Reader)

Having Alexander Hamilton, the biggest, most American, patriotic idiot as a boyfriend did cause a few troubles. He was always cussing out your country, England, for something they did to the Free Nation 200+ years ago.

“Please! Just once! We can celebrate British Day! It’s also the Queen’s birthday!” You pleaded, as he stared at you, raised his eyebrows and began to google, ‘British Day.’

“National day for the United Kingdom and a celebration of Britishness.” He told you, monotone, smirking.
“(Y/N).” He asked.
“I am not British.”
“Come on! I’ve been to that stupid Island a million times already. I can show you London, oh! Where I was born, my favourite tea shop, how much better the McDonald’s is there! Also the chicken sandwiches in the Underground are pretty good too.” You smiled faintly, presence here but mind wandering off to the streets of England.

“Ugh. Fine. Don’t expect me to where some British Flag hat or something.” He got up, kissed your temple and prepared to leave your apartment for the night.
“I wouldn’t ever make you.” You dramatically gasped, before grinning and waving him goodbye as he left with a gush of New York air and click of a door lock.

{Time Skip}

You squealed in your seat, leaning your head against the white surface of the plane, staring out at the New York City skyline glowing in the early light. Almost like little sparklers, twinkling, dying out, being struck alive.
“Are your excited?” You tore your attention away from the skies and looked at your boyfriend.
“Only because you are with me.” He smiled, putting his arm around you, and leaning in on your shoulder.
“Alex, what are you doing?”
“Taking a nap.” He murmured, sounding muffled from the fabric of your jacket.
“Well then I am too.” You giggled, successfully laying your head among the silky brown hair of Alexander Hamilton.
“…Welcome to London!” A perky flight attendant in red lipstick greeted over the microphone.
“Alex, get up.” You exclaimed, wide eyed as you shoved your drowsy off your shoulder.
“WE ARE HERE!!” You could practically feel the happiness rushing through your veins.
“That’s what you get for keeping me up all night!” You smirked at him, handing him his carry-on from the overhead compartment.
“I know you liked it.” He grinned and kissed you on the cheek.
“Let’s go!” You zoomed down the isle of the plane, almost knocking over a few people, anxious to see your home city.

“YOU SEE THIS ALEX? THIS IS LONDON AIR!” You shouted, rolling your suitcase on the cobblestone on the way to the hotel.
“It’s just like New York air (y/n)!”
“Thank you Ms, your room is 120. Enjoy your stay in London.” you cheered.
“Why does everyone have such a posh accent?” Alexander nudged you, and the clerk looked a bit taken aback.
“This is England.” You sighed, before smiling apologetically at the clerk and heading up to your room.

“TODAY IS THE QUEENS BIRTHDAY!” You raced out of the hotel bedroom, flipped on BBC and began making a cuppa.
“Today, we head into the heart of London.”

Everyone stopped to stare at the handsome man you you dragged him across the rough stone streets, laughing occasionally.
That was, until you saw he stopped at a small gift shop.
“Alex, what do you want from here?” You questioned, spinning the trinkets on the racks as if they were inhuman.
“I want something.” He muttered distractedly, scanning the shop.
You almost burst out laughing at what he chose…a navy blue jean hat with a big, sown on British flag and underneath ‘London’ scrawled in black fabric.
“Do you remember what you told me…? Ugh, never mind. Happy British Day you nerd.” You grinned as he fumbled counting the pounds correctly.



CONGRATS!! for being the biggest idiot in the world

  • Kirk: Yeah, I’ll have to agree with the walking thesaurus on that one.
  • Spock: Do not ever call me a thesaurus.
  • Kirk: It’s just a metaphor, dude.
  • McCoy: His people are completely literal. Metaphors are gonna go over his head.
  • Spock: Nothing goes over my head. My reflexes are too fast. I would catch it.
  • Uhura: I’m gonna die surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy.

Donald trump won Florida by 1% because of third party voters. That is inexcusable. You should not be so uneducated that you allow trump to win just to make your pitiful statement.

I’m a nice person I just hate everyone

She's Out Of My Life

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader (sort of)

Summary: Jensen thinks about his time with the Reader, wondering if he made a mistake in letting her go. 

Word Count: 2K-ish

Warnings: Angst. Nothing but good ol’ Angst. (At least I hope it is lmao)

Author’s Note: Heyy guys! This is my entry for my boo Kari’s challenge aka @thing-you-do-with-that-thing‘s “SPN Anti Valentine’s Challenge”. I got the song “She’s Out Of My Life” by Michael Jackson. I hope you guys like it. This is one of my favorite songs from the King of Pop. Aaannnnd feedback is always welcomed!!!

I was an idiot. If there was an award for being the biggest idiot in the entire planet, I’d definitely win it without question.

I screwed up. There was no other way to put it. I fucked up the best thing that could have probably ever happened to me, and it was all because I was too much of a fucking coward to voice my feelings.

How was I to go back to before? How could I possibly make this up to her? She was my friend, for Christ’s sake. My best friend. And I messed it all up.

I guess I kinda deserved it and I shouldn’t be feeling like this because I had it coming. I definitely brought this upon myself.

Keep reading

Stupid ~ Sirius Black

requested by anon

Hope its what you wanted

You were so angry with him. 

To accuse you of cheating. 

If anyone was to cheat it would be him. 

You were appalled. 

You couldn’t believe him. 

Sirius Orion Black was the biggest idiot in the country! 

“(Y/N)!” James snapped you out of your thoughts, “what’s number seven." 

"Dittany.” You muttered. 

“Are you still pissy about Sirius?” James asked, looking up from his potions work.

“No.” You lied. 

James raised an eyebrow. 

“Yes.” You grumbled, correcting your lie. 

“You need to give it up. Just forget about it. I actually am starting to miss how sickeningly cute you two were." 

"He’s an idiot, James. I didn’t cheat and he knows it. He just wanted attention.” You rolled your eyes at the prospect of making up with Sirius. 

“Have it your way.” James shook his head. 

You two finished your homework in the library and went back to the common room. On the way, Remus joined you. 

“Well, (y/n), I take it by the scowl on your face that you’re still angry with Sirius?" 

You nodded. 

"You should be somewhat proud, he’s still angry with you too. It’s quite annoying actually. One of you needs to apologize so we don’t have to tiptoe around you.” Remus said. 

“I didn’t do anything. He should apologize.” You huffed and quickened your pace so that you would leave the boys behind. 

Later that night Remus was bringing you to a magic room he found. 

“Seriously, (Y/N) the walls are made of gold and there is brilliant paintings and everything inside!” He had hushed to you. 

You, of course, immediately asked to see it and he told you he would take you later that night. 

You two snuck around the corridors after hours until you found the door. But to your dismay, Sirius and James were there too. 

“James, I told you I was taking her tonight! That way the two wouldn’t run into each other and bicker again.” Remus scolded out friend. 

“I don’t bicker.” Sirius scoffed. 

“You do.” You coughed. 



"No I don’t-" 

"Guys! Let’s just go into the room.” James interrupted. 

He opened the door to reveal a dark room. Remus let me and Sirius enter first. And before I knew it, the door had closed and locked behind us. 

“You sniveling little minxes!” You pounded on the door as soon as you realized what had happened. 

“Sorry can’t hear you!” James called. 

“We’ll be back when you guys have enough sense to forgive each other.” Remus shouted, “also, don’t try any spells on the door, they’ll bounce back." 

You and Sirius heard their retreating footsteps. 

"Lumos.” You said, flicking your wrist and emitting a light from the tip of your wand. 

You saw that you were in a broom closet. There was a dinky light that you turned on to reveal a scowling Sirius. 

You two sat in silence for a long time. Eventually standing was getting bothersome and you sat down. He followed shortly after.  Neither of you touched each other. If you did you quickly pulled away but the close quarters was not helpful in the personal space department. 

“They won’t even be able to tell if we apologize.” Sirius grumbled. 

“I know! They’re idiots.” You scoffed. 

You stole a glance at the boy and saw he was looking at you, but like children in primary school, you looked away as soon are you were caught. 

That was all the talking you did. Then you got up and decided to knock the door down with brute force, but it didn’t work and you sat down in defeat. 

“They’ve got us, love” Sirius smirked from his place of the ground. 

You huffed and sat down. 

“Why did you accuse me of something you knew I didn’t do?” You asked abruptly, siting back down.

“Because.” Was his response.

“Because why? Sirius?” You asked quite peeved at his nonchalant demeanor. 

“Because I don’t want to tell you why. I know what I did was wrong, okay. I’m sorry.” He spat, “now you can stay mad at me if you want but i’m not going to tell you everything. You’re going to have to trust me.”

“Just like you trusted me not to cheat?” You raised an eyebrow. 

“Touche.” He smiled in the dim light. 

You continued to sit together in silence after this and finally you decided to say something too. 

“I’m sorry for being a brat about this. I guess I was dramatic too.” You apologized. 

“It’s fine, love. We all do stupid stuff.” He toyed with the bristles on a broom next to him. 

Would this be stupid?” You asked, leaning forward and kissing him. 

The cupboard was already warm from your intermingling body hear, but the kiss went to your toes. Your lips moved in sync as you both forgot about why you were fighting. You heard the lock click from the outside and the door creak open, but you kept kissing Sirius sweetly. 

“Not stupid. Definitely not stupid.” Sirius laughed as you two pulled away. He caressed your cheek gently and whispered, ‘I love you”