these are so lame oh my god

canon isak and even things i will never get over;

  • isak calling even “baby”!!! what a nerd!!! think about the bts pet names they have for each other wow
  • even serenades isak constantly, on text, off text, with pop music or rap, he doesn’t give a fuck, he likes singing to his boyfriend
  • isak loves hearing even laugh, he literally said it out loud
  • evEN SAW ISAK THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL AND WAS SO INFATUATED HE JOINED A LAME THEATRE GROUP JUST TO MEET HIM
  • they take cute couple pictures together, 
    • they must be the worst, they’re the kind of couple that post a pic on valentines day like ‘never thought i’d be so lucky…….love u baby <3’ and gets 100+ likes and a million comments of like ‘oh my god u guys are such goals!!!’ and it kinda makes u feel lonely and bitter bc of it
  • SHARING CLOTHES! all the time!! stealing shirts and hoodies and anything!!!
  • even gets along really well with everyone in isak’s social circle, he’s so charming he made everyone fall in love with him and immediately go, i must protect this boy
  • HEART EMOJIS. need i say more???
  • one time isak pretended to break up with even bc even sarcastically said he didn’t like rap music, oh my god, i hate them so much
  • theY SEND EACH OTHER OUTDATED MEMES AND GENUINELY THINK THEYRE FUNNY, they deserve each other, wtf
  • they play FIFA together and get too competitive about it
  • CUDDLING. they canonically LOVE TO CUDDLE and play with each others hair and stroke each other’s cheeks, and lay in bed together.
  • they have all these little inside jokes and couple things that no one really gets or understands?????? but are so important to them???? like cheese toasties and drawings???? nerds
  • they both were really into to each other but thought the other one wasn’t interested, listen, i know, i’ve talked about this a million times, but guys………..what kind of fanfiction trope bullshit
  • THEY’RE SOFT!!!! SO SOFT!!! AND GENTLE WITH EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!
  • even thinks isak is hot, he’s said it so many times
  • isak gets embarassed and blushy when even is around his friends
  • what boys!!!!!!!! what a couple!!!!!!! what goals!!!!!!!!!

oh my god so last night i had a dream where dipper walked into the kitchen of the mystery shack to find a stack of really delicious pancakes and he asked grunkle stan “who made these pancakes?” and stan just stares at the door way and says “the author of the journals…..my brother” and it just cuts to the author like it does in nwhs like the exact same clip except he’s wearing a chef’s hat and  eughrugrtgr

Haikyuu Soulmate AU
  • Soulmate AU where the first things your soulmate says to you are tattooed on the inside of your wrist.
  • IwaOi:
  • Iwaizumi's wrist: "Hey are you a UFO? Because your appeal is out of this world."
  • Oikawa's wrist: "Do you have any idea how lame it was to walk around with THAT tattooed on my wrist? I mean I'll forgive you but oh my god."
  • KageHina:
  • KaGAYama's wrist: WILL YOU PLEASE TOSS TO ME PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
  • Hinata's wrist: You... How much milk did you DRINK to be able to jump like that...?
  • AsaNoya:
  • Noya's wrist: "Pleased to meet you."
  • Asahi's wrist: WHY DOES EVERY POLITE PERSON ON THE PLANET SAY THE SAME WORDS THAT ARE INKED ON MY WRIST WHY MUST YOU TORTURE ME SO MUCH FATE WHYYYYYY I JUST WANNA KNOW WHO THEY ARE
  • KuroTsuki:
  • Tsukishima's wrist: D-I-N-O-S-A U-R A DINOSAUR AN O-L-D M-A-N YOU'RE JUST AN OLD MAN HITTIN ON ME WHAT YOU NEED A CAT SCAN Meowwwww... Okay Bo what the ever-loving fuck this is the stupidest dare ever.
  • Kuroo's wrist: Tch. So the mark wasn't a prank...
  • LevYaku:
  • Lev's wrist: Are you a first-year? You look lost. I'm ________. Do you know where your club is meeting? No you're lost, umm... do you need to ask Coach where you need to be? Volleyball practice is mostly tryouts so he should be okay to help you out.
  • Yaku's wrist: I'm ________, nice to meet you. I didn't have time to join a club when everyone else did, my flight back from Russia was delayed so I missed it... Is volleyball fun, Yaku-san? I think I'll try it... unless being taller is a disadvantage, because I don't think I'm done growing yet...
  • BokuAka:
  • Bokuto's wrist: First year setter--
  • Akaashi's wrist: OH MY GOD YOU'RE A SETTER THANK GOD PLEASE BE MY SETTER AND PUT UP WITH ME I WILL GIVE YOU OWL PLUSHIES AND HUGS AND HECK PROBABLY ANYTHING YOU ASK PLEASE TOSS TO ME

Translation-guru


E: Alex…
N: wow, he’s got a guitar…
E: swipe right, don’t click
N: he looks cool, though
E: point is, you can pick yourself when you get tinder, you can log on, meet a lot of nice people
N: excuse me? I’m not gonna download tinder
E: why not?
N: why not? Isn’t that pretty clear, when I have a guy already?
E: yeah, but he lives in London, Nora.
N: now you’re being lame
E: you are a person who does the right things, you always have to be so nice. Can’t you just jump into it? Do it! Go like this, like OH you know? Yeah, exactly, now I feel like you’re…
N: yes, now… *walks away*
E: Nora!
N: bye, Eskild!
E: love you! Argh, difficult! Oh my god. Everyone knows that William won’t come. Jeeses!

I: uh, Eskild? Can I ask you a question?
E: Isak, seriously. Yes, I accept your apology, it’s okay, like for the last time I’m not mad at you. Okay? I… I get why you said what you said, and now I’m done with it. So you don’t have to walk around here like a… it’s driving me nuts!
I: it’s not that, I seriously need some advice.
E: of me? You need advice, of moi? You want that? Because you trust me? And look up to me?
I: yeah
E: because I’m your Guru?
I: sure
E: say it. Say: eskild is my guru.
I: fuck it, no no, just drop it
E: say it! Okay, okay okay okay, Isak! Okay. What do you need advice about?
I: you now that guy, Even?
E: yes. What about him.
I: we had a thing… and he said that he would break up with his girlfriend. And then suddenly he says that things are moving too fast, and then he’s together with his girlfriend again and then sometime after that again he gives me a drawing. And I’m like, cool, so I send him a text and thank him for the drawing, and then he doesn’t answer.

E: but he has a girlfriend?
I: yeah
E: okay, how long have they been together?
I: like four years
E: okay
I: that’s not good, right?
E: I mean yeah, or… I don’t know. How honest do you want me to be?
I: not too honest maybe… no, fuck it. Just say it like it is.
E: okay, like… I know a lot of guys in heterosexual relationships who sleep with guys, that’s normal, but… it’s not that many that breaks up with their girlfriend to be with them. I think, I mean, that’s just advice from me, just my opinion. My guru-advising. I’m not Buddha, not a God, kinda. So, was that helpful?

Valentine’s Day Sentence Starters

Mixed Starters :: Cute :: Fluffy :: Valentine’s Day Gone Wrong.

  1. “Who needs a date on valentine’s day when I have you?”
  2. “Our waiter is so hot.”
  3. "No, you have fun with your date. Don’t let my being stood up stop you.”
  4. “Oh, my god… the babysitter just cancelled on us! how are we supposed to go on the date now?”
  5. “Valentine’s day is my favorite holiday! I know it’s lame but I can’t help it. I’m a hopeless romantic. there, I said it.”
  6. “We’re going Dutch, right?”
  7. “Tell me that’s not my ex over there.”
  8. “What do you mean you’re at the restaurant across town?”
  9. “You’re literally the worst when it comes to being romantic.”
  10. “Babe, you know I love you, but… last time you cooked me a meal, I ended up in hospital. can’t we just go out for dinner…?”
  11. “Nobody said anything about this being a cover band!”
  12. “Um… yeah, these are really nice and all, but I’m allergic to roses.”
  13. Tthis is the worst valentine’s surprise ever! were you trying to scare me to death?!”
  14. “Oh my– are you proposing?!”
  15. “Do you think my secret admirer might finally reveal themselves today?”
  16. “Valentine’s day is such a scam of a holiday… it’s so stupid! I hate it.”
  17. “We’re eating out at the Golden Arches!”
  18. “We’re going to do anti-valentine’s day this year. we’re going to go out and do all of the least romantic date ideas ever, just to stick it to the man.”
  19. “I can’t believe I’m actually at a wedding on valentine’s day. what a lame cliché.”
  20. “Does this have caramel in it? I’m allergic to caramel!”
  21. “How was I supposed to know there would be a bee in the bouquet?!”
  22. “This is not a proposal!”
  23. “I shaved my legs for this?”
  24. “My boss told me I have to work late.”
  25. “I didn’t realize these tickets were for the nosebleed section.”
  26. “Um, I tried to buy some sexy underwear, but I think they sent me the wrong size…”
  27. “That movie was awful.”
  28. “You can’t seriously be proposing right now? on valentine’s day? couldn’t you have thought of something a little more original than that?”
  29. “Something has been nibbling on these chocolates.”
  30. “Um, I know this is really cliché and all, but it’s valentine’s day and I just wanted to say… I really like you.”
  31. “I’m going to be stuck at work for a little longer… I’m sorry, I know it’s our date tonight…”
  32. “I forgot to make reservations.”
  33. “I am not going to be your fake-date to this party.”
  34. “I wish I could do more for you today but I’m really broke…”
  35. “I love them and all, but their poetry is so bad! they’ve written seven love poems just for today.”
  36. “So… can I assume you don’t have a date tonight either?”
  37. “Olive Garden is not fine dining!”
  38. “I’m really sorry my dog peed on your good shoes.”
  39. “I didn’t forget that it was valentine’s day! I swear! your present is just… it’s somewhere else.”
  40. “What do you mean these diamonds are fake?”
  41. “We’re out of condoms.”
fic: How To Fall in Love with Dan Howell

a/n: i can’t get over how long this took to write. that is all.

title: how to fall in love with dan howell

genre: romance/gettingtogether

warnings: swearing

word count: 3000

summary: “Hey Dan, I’ve got this date tomorrow night and I really don’t want to screw it up, so would you mind going on a fake date with me so I can test my moves out?”

Keep reading

My piece for the Sheithlentine exchange on Twitter! Happy Valentines, @foxkunkun! I’m still learning how to draw digitally so I’m sorry if the colours are too bold, but I hope you like it! A lil fic to go with this underneath c: EDIT: Something in my theme is causing this to be copied twice when you look at this on my blog from a computer?? IDK how to fix it, sorry ^^;

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I noticed at the beginning of episode 5 of Mob Psycho 100, Teru was texting a girl he was going to have lunch with. He responds with “いいぞで待っ★テル★んだよ” which roughly means “Sure, I’ll be waiting” BUT makes a pun with his name. “Matteru” is to wait, and as you can see to make sure you really see the TERU part of the word he puts his name in stars.

I tried to think of an English equivalent, and the best I could come up with is “See you in an in★TERU★m (interim).” Oh my God, that is so lame….

Teru a punster confirmed.

Hire me, Viz.

Dating Sirius Would Include...
  • Oh my GOD so much sass
  • You having to take a moment after every lame pun he makes
  • Him interruption your make-out session to ask you to stop touching his hair
  • Him filling up the bathroom cupboards with various hair styling products
  • “It takes effort to look this good, y/n”
  • 2 am adventures 
  • Him turning into padfoot to give you frights all the time
  • Him telling you to become an animagi as well
  • So much junk food
  • “Life is too short to eat celery”
  • Going on walks and stopping to pet every single dog
  • “Can we get a dog?”
  • “Sirius you are a dog”
  • You reading books to him because he’s too lazy to read them himself and he likes the sound of your voice
  • dinner dates with Remus and whoever he’s dating
  • ultimate squad goals with the marauders and lily
  • you becoming best friends with Lily 
  • Going for walks in forests with James and Lily
  • Him being a surprisingly good cook
  • Prank wars
  • Him buying clothes for you so that you two can aesthetically match when you go out
  • Him styling your hair
  • Him watching you very intensely as you put on your make up
  • “How does it work?”
  • Him always asking questions about muggles and muggle-life
  • Kisses with LOTS of tongue 
  • Him being the most chivalrous person you have ever met
  • You being treated like an actual princess
  • “I love you”
  • “You’ve told me 10 times in the past 2 minutes”
  • “I just have to make sure you know”
8

Requested:  Hiiii can I request text with bts about them finding adorable their shortie girlfriend(I’m 5'2 and 19, lame I know) Ok byee♡

((Hoseok-J-hope, Jimin, Jin, Jungkook))

Pt. 1.

——————————————————————————————

A/N: I HOPE YOU LIKE THEM OMG, AND NONO LAME, my sister’s friend is even a bit shorter than you and she’s 19 as well, so like yeah. Shortness power. All of them. Gonna post part two in a minute!! Please if you liked it feel free to request anytime.

BTS Reaction to you beating them at a game

Jin (Seokjin): WHAT?? YOU CAN’T BEAT ME AT MARIO KART… IT’S MY FAVOURITE GAME!!! *frustrated*


Suga (Yoongi): UGH WHATEVER I’m still a better rapper than you


J-Hope (Hoseok): *judging you* are you sure you didn’t cheat somehow? HOW CAN SOMEONE BE SO GOOD AT JUST DANCE?! I’M THE LEAD DANCER IN THE GROUP AND YOU BEAT ME?! *done with everything*


Rap Monster (Namjoon): *frustrated* HOW? WHY? WHAT DID I DO WRONG TO DESERVE LOSING AGAINST YOU? *starts questioning his whole existence*


Jimin: *pretends to be upset about it* OH MY GOD WHYYYYY, WHY MEEEEE *internally giggling* 


V (Taehyung): REVENGE! AND THIS TIME I WILL WIN AGAINST YOUR LAME ASS *slightly judging you for beating him*


Jungkook: *gives you the cold shoulder until you ask him what’s wrong* what’s wrong you ask? I’M THE GOLDEN MAKNAE AND I LOST AT WII SPORTS that’s what’s wrong


Credit to the gif owners~

Yoonseok Internet Friends AU 1

masterlist

;);)),;;;;;)))



Where Yoongi confesses to Hobi

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEhhhhhhhhhh happy friday and ohhhh what is this ohh this is YOONSEOK!!!! I’ve been asked to do series for them so I’ll do! I feel like this is all going to be yoongi being awkward and hobi being cheesy but anyways started with the confession bc I like it like this, I’ll prob post how they met soon! :))) If you are new, you might want to check my Jikook Internet Friends AU (contains yoonseok too) and if you have something to say or to ask, go ahead! I don’t take requests for now but I will soonnn dw

Sorry for the small mistakes and I hope you like it!

BONUS

when the signs start to crush on someone

aries: haha fuck

taurus: this isn’t so ba — jk make it stop pls

gemini: pls god why me

cancer: again???

leo: this would almost be nice if I wasn’t having heart palpitations rn

virgo: lol no

libra: oh shit :))))) 

scorpio: can I sleep this one out

sagittarius: but they’re so lame tho

capricorn: @heart: can u not

aquarius: what is this I didn’t call for this

pisces: …maybe I’m just hungry??

*I’m aware that this isn’t an original idea, I just wanted to make my own post about it lmao*