It’s okay if you’re a lesbian who has never had a girlfriend. It’s okay if you’ve known you’re a lesbian for years and you’ve never had a girlfriend. It’s okay if you’ve been out as a lesbian for years and you’ve never had a girlfriend.
Dating is really, really, really hard, and it can be incredibly difficult for you to find other women who date women. There’s not shame in being perpetually single, even if you want a girlfriend. Dating a lesbian is a million times harder than dating as a straight person, because the dating pool is so much smaller and it can be incredibly difficult to tell if your crush also likes girls (and if they do, do they even like you?)
I guess what I’m saying is have compassion on yourself. There’s nothing wrong with you if you haven’t had a girlfriend yet. It doesn’t make you undesirable or ugly or undateable or anything. Whether or not you have a girlfriend is tied to hundreds of other factors, most of which are out of your control and entirely unrelated to how “dateable” you are.
For all my perpetually single lesbians out there: it won’t be like this forever, but there’s nothing wrong with you. You aren’t unattractive or undesirable. You’ll get there someday, and you aren’t alone <3