these are probably getting worse and worse

Dear The Walking Dead writers,

WHY. IS. MY. BABY. BOY. NEGAN. BEING. ATTACKED. BY. RICK. THE. PRICK. 

He doesn't deserve this hatred. He’s not evil just misunderstood. 

- Sincerely me

Here’s some fucking advice yall:

  • Middle school is worse than high school.
  • High school is worse than college.
  • No one fucking knows what they’re doing, we’re all just faking it and pretending we understand so people will respect us but if you tell us we’re doing it wrong, you’re probably right because rarely does someone know better.
  • You will find something you like to do that you can make money doing.
  • You’re going to find friends that aren’t going to fucking wreck you.
  • You’re not always going to live in the hell hole that you’ve known for so long.
  • It’s going to get better, but I’ll be honest, it doesn’t always stay better, but it gets better again. Bad times are just times that are bad. They don’t stay. Everything is fucking temporary.
  • Just fucking watch your favorite TV shows, tell ppl you love them when you do, and don’t play games with emotions because it ends up hurting like hell.
  • And eat dessert when you want it.
  • And know you ALWAYS deserve better.
Periods Aren’t That Bad. They’re Actually A Whole Lot Worse: A Lesson For Non-Period-Havers

Disclaimer 1: This will probably get a little NSFW.

Disclaimer 2: Symptoms of periods vary from period-haver to period-haver. It pretty much sucks for everyone, though.

Disclaimer 3: I have a high pain tolerance. Really high. If I say something is really painful, it is really fucking painful.

And now for the reasons why having periods suck and it’s worse for us to have it than for you to hear about it:

  1. There is blood coming from our vaginas. This is a very unpleasant feeling. We cannot “hold it.” Some people get a light trickling. Some, like me, get a Goddamn crime scene.
  2. The ways to keep from bleeding all over everything include a pad, which basically feels like a diaper, and a tampon, which is basically shoving a cotton pipe up there, is not as much fun as it sounds, and can be very uncomfortable if done wrong. And doing it right is fairly hard. Thanks to good old Catholic sex ed, it took me about five years to figure out.
  3. Cramps. I am lucky in that my cramps tend not to be THAT bad (thank you, high pain tolerance), but some get cramps so bad that the pain is comparable to appendicitis.
  4. Headaches. What I lack in cramps, I often make up for in headaches. And not just any headaches. Agonizing headaches. They can start up to a week before the bleeding starts, they last a few days into it, and they don’t go away. No matter how much aspirin you take. Seriously, when I get menstrual headaches, I could down an entire fucking bottle of Advil and I’d probably die but my ghost would still have the headache.
  5. Acne. I’m talking looking like Deadpool under the mask.
  6. Indigestion. It isn’t fun.
  7. Bloating.
  8. Sometimes my actual vaginal region hurts. A lot. Enough to have me doubled over on the floor.
  9. For some reason my anxiety gets worse sometimes around my period. Which is extra fun. There’s nothing like nearly calling the morgue because your dad was late from a basketball game, only to find out he was at Applebee’s.
  10. Fatigue. Because I’m doing everything I normally do while my body is staging a mutiny.
  11. Backache.
  12. Just generally feeling disgusting.
  13. This goes on for a week.
  14. This happens every Goddamn month.
  15. This generally starts around age twelve or so and lasts until maybe age 45.

Of course it’s unhealthy to be fat.

If you’re fat, you’re going to have a rough time getting health insurance. You probably won’t get regular checkups and preventive care, and any health problems you might have (completely unrelated to your weight) will be a lot worse whenever you finally do see a doctor.

Even if you have health coverage, you probably avoid going to the doctor if you’re fat. So you’re in the same situation. Why do you avoid going to the doctor? Every time you walk into a doctor’s office, the first thing they want you to do is step on a scale. Then you get the lecture, or the belittling remark, or worse, the weight loss advice. You figure, as long as you feel okay, why risk it? You don’t pay for abuse in any other setting, right? You value your mental health, so you stay away.

If you’re fat and you do visit the doctor, he or she might decide to treat your weight, rather than your symptoms. You get a diet, rather than a diagnosis. The doctor says all your ills are caused by your fat. Six months later, you still have sharp pains in your heel or nasal congestion or shooting lights in your vision. So you find a new doctor. This time you actually get treatment for your plantar fasciitis or your sinus infection or your brain tumor. (These examples are based on actual cases.)

Your doctor may not like fat people. A recent study found that fat women are a third less likely to get breast exams, gynecologic exams, or Pap smears. An exception: Fat and thin women get mammograms equally often. (The authors said that doctors may do exams more readily if they don’t have to touch fat patients.) Fat women are at increased risk for certain scary cancers (breast, cervical, endometrial, ovarian). Getting less preventive care, researchers concluded, may “exacerbate or even account for” this increased risk. It’s not the fat that kills us, it’s the fat hatred.

— 

But What About Your Health?

By Marilyn Wann

From Fat!So? Because You Don’t Have to Apologize For Your Size

blehblehblargh  asked:

Hi kiwi! 😀 I have a question. How do you manage to draw your OCS so consistent all the time? Even when its a simple doodle I can tell what character it is! I have a few different OCS and it seems like whenever I get really good at drawing one, the way I draw a different one gets worse.

first off thanks !!! it helps that ive drawn each of them about two bazillion times 

but other than just practicing to stay consistent, its important to design the character with recognizable traits to begin with

the formula i use for creating characters that will be recognizable through any style is to
1. base them off one specific shape
2. give them one or two immediately recognizable features, so that even when the proportions are off or you switch styles itll strike you as that character

take these drawings of ophelia for example, which by no means are consistent in style or proportion

(as far as getting good at drawing one character and another getting worse– its probably not that you got worse, your eye for detail has just gotten better so you can notice the flaws easier. its a big ole carousel of updating and redesigning ocs to keep up with your skill level)

if youre struggling to make them look the same every time, try simplifying. draw your character with less and less lines and see how long it takes for them to be unrecognizable. if you dont get very far, it may not be your skill at drawing consistently, their design just needs a bit of spice. (a good design isnt necessarily a complicated one– focus on building a unique foundation instead of adding details to make them distinct)

i bet you can guess right away who these guys are, even though theyre entirely off model (a very exaggerated example, but you get my point)

This episode’s old and has been mentioned before, but after Lance comes out of the healing pod he starts flirting with Allura 

And then you see Keith after, while everyone just looks done/tired with Lance, he literally just looks jealous and pissed off saying: “Classic.”

But if you think about it, Keith is probably annoyed that Lance doesn’t realize that they just had a “bonding moment” and then to make it even worse Lance completely forgets about the bonding moment…LOL I just feel so bad for Keith here.

He’s probably so stressed out because everyone else is getting all the love and Lance doesn’t even remember that he defended him against Zendak and “bonded” with him too. 

(And to make it even worse he was so impatient waiting for Lance to heal because he probably thought: “Hey, we had a moment, maybe we’re friends, I actually kinda care about him and his well-being now.” But then Lance just comes out and doesn’t even acknowledge Keith and it’s actually really sad?)

(Look how excited he was when Lance comes out, Keith barely ever smiles!)

This just makes me feel really bad for Keith because he’s probably not used to having connections/moments with people like he did with Lance, so he probably felt really horrible when Lance forgot. 

He really valued that bonding moment…He’s not even real and I just wanna give him a hug tbh. 

THIS POST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY: SEDDM - Trying to comfort the fandom and himself at the same time.

Does this pic hurt you? GOOD. It should. It means that the characters are well written and their suffering is your suffering as well.

Should you get too worried about this pic? NO. I don’t know how the season is going to end, I don’t know if there’s going to be some sort of resolution to this Star-Marco “conflict”, or if it’s going to happen in season 3 (but it’s obviously going to happen, eventually, because thank god writing is not real life). What I do know is that, despite the title and the theme of the episode, Star and Marco aren’t “just friends”, they’re BEST friends, who are always going to do everything they can to help and care for eachother.

THIS MARCO MOTHER***ER HERE interrupts (again) a makeout session to make sure that his best friend is ok and isn’t feeling left out

AND REFUSES TO GO BACK TO HOT LIPS ON LIPS ACTION UNTIL HE TELLS STAR HOW MUCH HE APPRECIATES HER

AND THIS OTHER MOTHER***ER HERE, who is dying inside, in six episodes has grown enough to go from “Let me use a forbidden spell to spy on Marco’s date” to “My heart is on fire but Marco is happy and that’s ok”

And I don’t know what’s going to happen in Face the Music, and this scene from Starcrushed’s promo might very easily be out of context, BUT IT STILL IS THE ESSENCE OF MARCO’S AND STAR’S FRIENDSHIP, COMMUNICATING.


So: are things going to get worse? Probably. Is Star going to screw up something? Possibly. Is the season going to end on a sad cliffhanger, without solving anything and just getting worse and worse? Sounds unlikely to me but it might be.
Are Marco and Star really going to be torn apart? Not in a million episodes.


Disclaimer: as usual, I can’t be 100% about anything I say. What I know is that the show is amazingly consistent with its characters, and that eventually happiness is going to be back for Star and for us viewers.

About Sleep Paralysis

It’s been so long since the last post regarding my recurrent nightmares and dreams, and I wish I could have continued without writing another post about it but unfortunately last night I had another weird dream plus sleep paralysis in the morning. I want to keep track of every hallucination I’ve experienced here, so, here it goes:

The first time it happened I was 14 years old, my grandma had just passed away and I was very stressed between school and shit going on with my life. I remember one night that I was sleeping and suddenly I woke up, but I couldn’t move. I opened my eyes only to see the darkness of my room and the wall in front of me. I was very scared and couldn’t move a single muscle. After trying everything else, I decided to scream but no sound would come out of my mouth. Then I heard a voice saying repeatedly saying: “Come with me. I’m here. Come with me”. I panicked and I don’t remember anything else, I think I probably passed out until the next day.

After that, at least two times a week my sleep paralysis would get worse. I would wake up in the middle of the night not moving at all. I could hear voices outside my house and inside my bedroom. I remember being so scared of sleeping, not knowing what was going on. Things moved on like that for a while. 

Everything continued like that until the hallucinations became worse. One night, after graduating high school I had some sort of “astral projection” “lucid dreaming” stuff going on. I remember dreaming of this place with high grass and watching two skinny dying horses. After walking trough a train rail I got to be in some sort of cave formed by green trees with giant roots stepping out of the ground. I saw snakes everywhere, tiny and big, in all sort of shapes and colours. I finally caught a snake with my hands and saw in its eyes. Then I heard a voice saying “We’ll see again”. When the dream was over I woke up in my room, and again, couldn’t move. This time I felt something under my bed crawling and heard another time: “We’ll see again, find me” repeatedly. 

The worst attack of sleep paralysis and hallucinations I can remember came after that. Maybe half a year later after that weird dream. My room was dark and a little bit cold (it was autumn I think). At the time, I was depressed (I suffer from depression since I was 15). The last thing I did conscious was getting in my bed and trying to sleep on my back. After a few moments I remember waking up very fast, like, something hit me and I woke up suddenly. My body was not responding. I could see my hands, my knees, my feet but couldn’t move at all. Then I started “moving”; everything was heavier and that’s when I started hallucinating. I tried to move my legs and I could feel them moving, but I couldn’t see the movement of them. Weirdly though, I could move my head a little, I could see my room and my wall. And then it came, I don’t know from where, but, at the end of my bed I saw a pair of hands, with three large, large and skinny fingers. Something crawled from under my bed and started climbing it. It was a weird, dark creature. It was skinny, like, very, very skinny, you could see his ribs and spine. I could see his arms, like sticks, and then I saw his face. Whatever it was, it was very dark, like a profound black, and had a weird face, like an oval. The thing had no mouth, no fur, no hair nor nose, just two yellow eyes. The eyes were round shaped, like two glowing perfect circles. The creature was crawling and making weird noises, like a voice mixed with a scream and nails passing trough a chalk board. After it crawled onto my bed, he started laughing, quietly, like, when you laugh with your mouth closed. I just remember trying to move, and scream, and then I felt his arms touching my legs. I don’t know why but I started thinking in weird stuff and trying to scream in my mind: “i’m not going with you, you’re not real, you’re not real”.  I must have passed out or something, cause I can’t remember anything after all. I woke up in the morning, sweating and very scared. 

After receiving the visit of that thing fro at least two or three times more I decided to draw it on my notebooks with everything I could remember.

This has been going on with me for at least 6 years now, and time after time it’s getting worse. However, I think i’ll continue writing everything here, after all, I know i’m not alone, although sometimes it feels like that…

P.S: Dear @sixpenceee, hope you reblog this, cause I want to find if more people are suffering the exact same thing with the exact same creatures.

watch me (m)

genre ― smut + a bit of fluff at the end, fuckboy!au

pairing ― jungkook | reader | taehyung

synopsis ― Dodging Jungkook’s annoying horny texts was easy but what happens when another boy accidentally joins in on the fun?

words ― 7,633

note : I meshed Play & Play 2.0 together and added a few things. Before I get asked, yes there will another part to this.

extra note : part two


Your ringtone kept blasting in your ear as you tried to sleep before a big presentation. You groaned, cursing yourself for not turning off the volume as you reached for the glowing device knowing exactly who it was. You denied the call thinking,”Why is he so fucking desperate?” You began closing your eyes again until a loud ding woke you up again.

JK (1:57 AM): Why didn’t you answer babe? I want to talk to you :(

You rolled your eyes and turned off your phone, getting back to your much needed sleep.

It was almost a routine with Jungkook, calling you at 2 in the morning expecting you to be down for some sexting. That boy didn’t know when to quit and you should have already blocked his number considering he’s been like this for 4 months straight. But you’ll be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t like the attention he was giving you.

Not that you were the only girl, of course, because being the all-star soccer player he had half the school population begging for him. Hell not just him but the rest of the soccer team and you weren’t one to judge because your eyes would wander over to their table every once in awhile just like the rest of them.

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I’ve Got You

IT’S WHUMP WEEK! Hope you’re all as excited for this as I am. I’m going to try and throw some (k)lance whump at you every day!

Day One- Fever


Lance glared up at the ceiling with narrowed eyes, as if its very presence offended him. “Why do we even make plans?” he wondered aloud. “They always go south, anyways.”

Keith rolled his eyes. “If we just stormed into Galra bases with no idea what we were doing, then we’d be caught pretty easily.”

Lance eyed him, unimpressed. His skin looked unusually pale in the dim, purple light. “Kinda like how we are now?”

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A Target Retales PSA

Hey guys.

So I’ve got some bad news and I’ve got some good news. 

The bad news: I’m now on medical leave from work.

I’ve been struggling with some medical issues for years now, but they’ve been progressively getting worse and worse, and now I’m at a point where I just can’t be on my feet or just generally active for more than a few minutes at a time, let alone long enough to work a shift. 

Doctors have been struggling to figure out a diagnosis. So far all that we know is that it’s probably something neurological. I’ve got some tests this week that hopefully will shed some light on things, but honestly, I’m not overly optimistic. So until things get figured out and I can get some sort of treatment started, I’m on leave from work.

Which means no new retales for the time being.

The good news: This does not mean I’m out of content.

I’ve had a lot of projects I’ve been working on/wanting to work on for a while now, but between work and the physical/emotional toll that going through work, I haven’t been able to give them my full attention. Thankfully, being bedridden goes hand-in-hand with digital content in my case.

I’ve got a Target Retales podcast in the works! In fact, the first episode is going to be published later tonight!

I’ve got a YouTube channel! A lot of you are subscribed, but I’ve neglected it for the last couple of months. But now I’m back in action, posting at least once a week if not twice, and I’ve got some great plans for videos coming up!

I’ve got a couple other podcasts in the works! I’ve teased the one wherein I over-analyze pop media and expose the terrifying truths of fictional universes (Lightning McQueen is an abuser?), and I’m planning a scripted D&D comedy series!

And I’ve been teasing one huge project for months and months now, but I’ve had to put it off for a while with everything going on, but now I can finally buckle down and get to work on it, so I feel ready to let you guys in on the secret.

I’m working with an agency and writing a Target Retales book.

So even if I’m not releasing new stories, there’s still a TON of content coming, both Retales-related and not!

Wanna help me out?

There is, of course, the catch. While I’m super excited to be able to work on all of my projects, I’m now not able to work at work, which is, you know, how money is made.

I’m not in any sort of financial crisis, so I won’t be asking for donations or anything, but if you like my content and would like to support me, this would be a great time to check out my Patreon. I’m going to be adding some new perks and changing things up in the near future, but I can guarantee there will be all sorts of fun things in store if you decide to help me out here. In fact, any current Patrons or new Patrons who join by the end of the month will receive a hand-written letter from me, including unreleased Retales and a few stickers.

In Summary:

I’m taking medical leave from work, no new Retales will be released but all sorts of projects are still in the works, including a podcast and a book, and I’m offering a cool bonus if you support me during this rough patch on my Patreon.

Thank you all so much for all the support you’ve shown me since the start. I wouldn’t be where I am without you and I hope you enjoy the content I continue to make.

2

Maybe I should make a video on this… or maybe not… I’ve reached the point ajere I think people don’t even watch my videos anymore.

Is not like I don’t make it clear that I don’t want spoilers like this out there, or that this exact same spoiler was what caused this whole Problem I’m in right now.

It also doesn’t take more than 1 second of using of brain to be like “wait, I am uploading someone else’s work without permission. If I upload this I’m just getting views off something I didn’t do, and that the creator probably wants to keep as a secret”

But NOPE, these dumb donkeys that act like a human do not think about that. AND THEY THINK IS COOL! Like they’re being a hero or some shiz by uploading a video that got deleted!

I haven’t been able to progress in my animtion at all this week, because I feel so uninspired to do anything because of this. Between the copyrighr strike, between the constant re-uploads of a full minute of animtion of my next wpisode without permisions, between my really crapy health condition at the moment (which gets worse and worse out of stress) it just… feels like it defeated me.

Makes me think, if people are clearly not watching my videos that don’t have the word Glitchtale plastered on the title (because if they had they would’ve realised that I don’t want spoilers somewhere) Then … crap man, I’ll be able to keep up woth this job for like another year or two and then what. I’ll probably live under a bridge or something.

I’m sorry I’m ranting ONCE AGAIN about this whole issue, but I have no one to share this with and I feel like if I keep it to myself I’m gonna break down.

But I find this spoilers in a daily basis right now. And I don’t feel like a video will fix it, people just don’t care, or they’ll do it anywaus regardless because they think is funny.

Better

Title: Better

Wordcount: 3,525

Summary: Virgil is touch-starved and seeks Patton’s help. (i.e. that one super self-indulgent fic with lots of angst and cuddling.)

Ship: Moxiety

Warnings: minor self-loathing, mentions of panic attacks, brief mentions of nsfw, swearing

Tag List:  @mira-jadeamethyst, @pippa-frost, @cup-of-blue, @iaminmultiplefandoms, @prplzorua, @notallpotatoesarefrenchfries, @madelynnaa, @sanderships, @ace-anxiety-sanders, @frustratedwaffle, @the-diaries-of-a-nerd@cochroachkappa-blog

beta’d by the admirable @thuriweaver and @randomslasher (extra thanks to @randomslasher for suggesting this idea!)

Virgil doesn’t usually like being touched—it’s not bad, per se, it’s just weird. At first, he was too nervous around the others to touch them or be touched by them, and they respected that and they left him alone. And that was good, that was what they were supposed to do, but it became a—a habit of sorts, Virgil supposes. They don’t touch him and he doesn’t touch them and that’s the way it always has been and always will be.

But sometimes—sometimes he sees Logan and Patton cuddling on the couch, or Roman resting a familiar hand on Logan’s back, or Patton ruffling Roman’s hair, and he wants. It’s a low, uncomfortable feeling that hovers somewhere between hunger and a miserable, constant ache. What would it be like to have their casual affection, their ease with each other, the warmth of their hands and the press of their bodies against his? On one hand, he longs for it—or at least he longs to know what it would be like.

On the other hand, he loathes it.

It’s needy—it’s needy and childish and pathetic. He’s done just fine all of these years, so clearly touch isn’t something he needs. It’s just something he wants. Sometimes. Occasionally. (A lot. It’s been getting worse. He’s been getting worse.)

But he chokes down those feelings (they taste like coffee grounds, bitter and far too strong) as he’s choked down so many others before, and he moves on. He cuddles the tiny stuffed cat that Patton had given him for his birthday and he wraps himself in heated blankets until he can pretend he’s hugging and being hugged. It’s stupid, but it’s all he’s got.

He’s not going to wallow in self-pity about it, though. He’s over that shit. He’s got a job to do and it doesn’t involve fantasizing about cuddling, of all things. He’s fine. Totally fine.

Until, that is, June 6th.

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Hello children it's time for some Trans Boy Michael Mell hcs

- ok so he probably started HRT and changed his name like j u s t before he went into high school so everyone has kinda just always known him as a Guy
- jeremy already knows he’s trans tho cause they’ve been friends for fucking forever and he’s super supportive about it
- like he’ll give like time checks on how long Michael has had his binder on and give him them mf Home baked Cookies after injections cause injections suck
- also did I mention Michael wears a binder cause he totally does
- which probably made the bathroom scene worse cause binder + anxiety = Bad
- anyway he like,,, rarely gets too dysphoric as well cause everyone just knows him as a guy anyway so misgendering is rare
- plus he’s never felt too bad about his body esp after starting hormones so it’s only like occasionally when it happens
- until after the bathroom scene
- and it gets worse cause anxiety + dysphoria = B A D
- and then after the whole Squib Fiasco everyone kinda knows he’s trans cause jeremy but most people are p cool about it
- except this one fucking guy
- there’s always that One Fucking Guy
- and he like confronts Michael about it while Jeremy is somewhere else and proper harasses him with all the transphobic slurs and phrases under the sun
- but then jake and rich come by and they’re like ‘c a n w e h e l p y o u’ to this binch
- and it’s not long until this dude just runs the fuck away but Michael is still super shaken by it
- but then jake and rich are like 'bruh it’s chill forget that guy’ and just,,,, give him so much gender validation and it’s beautiful
- after that he still gets bouts of dysphoria but it’s fine cause the gang (ESP JEREMY) just shower him with validation whenever it gets too bad and it’s gr8 ok I’m done

Ch 128: Regrettable Truth?

In the new chapter Ciel finds the part of the photo that Agni gave to Soma before he was killed. Afterwards, Ciel asks Sebastian whether he would lie to him…

…to which Sebastian answers that he “regrettably” doesn’t tell lies, causing this terrified expression from Ciel:

Maybe it’s just me and maybe it’s obvious, but I was asking myself why Ciel was asking Sebastian that question in the first place and what he was referring to?

Reading the chapter again I now think that Ciel was referring to Sebastian’s answer here…

…and then wanted to confirm his answer by asking whether he was lying then. Ciel usually knows that Sebastian is contractually obligated to tell the truth but he asks anyway. So the fact that this photo fell out of Soma’s hand seems to be taken very seriously by Ciel and it also causes his terrified expression at the end of the chapter.

Even Sebastian seems to know that this is a serious topic for Ciel since he not only says that he doesn’t tell lies, he also uses the word “regrettably” as if he, too, wished he could say something else.

But since the photo fell out of Soma’s hand Ciel must assume that Soma saw what’s on the photo. Now we haven’t seen it yet but there are probably not many possibilities for the contents of that piece of photo. It’s the one that Ciel threw in the fire earlier so it’s the family photo that Pitt made. And the most likeliest possibility is that our Ciel’s twin can be seen there (if the 2CT is true). Since it’s such a small part of the photo I’m not sure how Soma should know that the person on the picture is a second Ciel, especially since the other Ciel was on a different part:

But regardless of what’s exactly shown on that photo, Ciel must think it’s very bad if Soma knows about it. His reaction to that seems even worse or at least as shocked as his reaction to the message on the wall. So if it’s about the twin, is it really worse that someone knows of the existence of a twin than someone leaving such a message on the wall which probably refers to the twin, as well?

Maybe it’s because it’s Soma who knows. If it’s just an intruder who knows about it it’s still shocking but Ciel can get rid of him through Sebastian (or so he might believe). In Soma’s case this is not so easy since I’m sure Ciel doesn’t want to kill Soma. So I guess it will be interesting to see how Ciel will face Soma when he wakes up.

The Supercorp Fandom™

Ok, i just feel i have to get this off my chest, especially for the younger/newer users on this site. Supercorp is /the/ most toxic fandom i have ever seen in the 5-6 years I’ve had this blog. I’d even say that some of them are worse than superwholock at the height of its popularity. I just don’t want younger users seeing this and thinking it’s normal, IT’S NOT! Please, please, please don’t use the the supercorp fandom as your basis for how to approach other fandoms. They bully and attack and have no regard for the well-being (mental or emotional) of people who don’t agree with them over a tv show. It’s pathetic and sad and i just hope it hasn’t affected too many young users