therefore i blame you all

anonymous asked:

I'm really sad for Touka. Like, she can't stop making her self sad because kaneki is always on her mind. She doesn't even want to think about him or talk about him. Her studies will surely be affected by this. And I really think she's in love with him. It's pretty obvious now especially in the anime...l

I feel you anon ;~; my queen is in pain, therefore I am in pain…

But in all seriousness can you blame her? This is a girl who went what? 10 years? of her life without parents. Probably even more. And all her life she’s been hunted down and betrayed countless times. She was forced to build walls around herself so she wouldn’t be hurt again. Then her little brother, whom all she had, gets up and leaves her for basically a gang that’s been terrorizing the wards. Sure, he had a valid reason, but he never gave that reason to her. With that, she developed her trust issues further, not letting anyone in. But what do ya know, here comes a guy who barges into her life that just happened to come from the species that hated her kind, basically the bane of her existence. She’s forced to help him and train him, but this one guy, no matter how much she wants to despise him, starts to break down those walls she worked so hard to build. He slowly chips away at them and she’s compelled to always help him. That’s why she just “happened” to be at the church. That’s what compelled her to save Kaneki from aogiri. This one guy that broke through her shield in such little time gets up and leaves her after he had just promised he wouldn’t. Anime wise, for the same organization that her little brother did. Manga wise, to literally fight her little brother. He wants to protect her, but at what cost? Losing her trust again, or so we are forced to think. Touka literally tries to see him whenever there is the slightest chance. She yearns to see him again. If that wouldn’t give her depressing thoughts about this man I wouldn’t know what will. It’s not as if she wants to think about him to make herself sad. It’s just that this boy comes into her life and she tried so hard to hate him, but she couldn’t. She tried so hard to make him hate her, but she couldn’t. She finds herself leaning on him, but he just ups and leaves as she stumbles after him.

Honestly, whether you’re a touken shipper or not, there is no way in hell anyone can tell me that Touka doesn’t care about Kaneki with her every being. And vice versa. Kaneki really cares about Touka as well, whether as a friend or lover isn’t as clear yet, but it is clear that Touka loves Kaneki. It was obvious even before the anime, but yeah the anime DEFINITELY emphasizes it more.

I’m not so sure if her studies will be as affected by this though. I mean he is the reason that she wants to get in Kamii. I feel that it might help her work harder towards her goal.

AH SORRY THIS IS SO LONG “-.- I tend to ramble with these two like I said, but yeah that’s my thought on this so far.