there have been attempted ones though

The Fate of Pink Diamond

Everyone is posting their theories on who shattered Pink Diamond. I’ve seen it going every direction: Yellow Diamond did it; White Diamond did it; Pearl did it. And while I’m a big believer that Pearl was, at the VERY least, involved in her shattering, I also have an alternate theory.

Consistently, whenever Pink Diamond’s demise has been mentioned–in her presence–Pearl has always shown great distress. At first I assumed it was grief; if you subscribe the the theory that Pearl belonged to Pink Diamond, it might be caused by any residual feelings she might have about her Diamond. Perhaps it has been because the act has ruined Rose’s name or because of how Steven found out.

We don’t know why, but Pearl has always shown great duress whenever Pink Diamond’s shattering is brought up.

The Crystal Gem rebellion was only as successful as it was in great part due to Rose’s healing abilities. So long as they weren’t shattered, she could bring her comrades back from mortal injury with her tears. It’s very likely that, particularly during the early stages of the rebellion, that their chances were dismally low.

Lots of people have pointed out that only a diamond can break a diamond, which has been one of the big reasons why people believe Pink was shattered by another diamond. The only problem is why? We’ve seen that Yellow, though she manages her grief well, is still very torn up by the loss of Pink Diamond.

Though she was hasty in The Trial and most of her actions could easily be perceived as an attempt to cover up her own part in the shattering of Pink Diamond, Yellow has never been a patient gem. She is quick to anger and though she may keep a calm facade, she has always been quick to lash out.

In Message Received, even when Peridot is still obeying respectful protocols, when she tries to convince Yellow to abort the Cluster and preserve the Earth she lays into Peridot. 

This is before Peridot outright disobeys her orders and calls her diamond a clod. She probably would have given Peridot the same treatment she gave the Zircons if she had been physically present. I really don’t believe Yellow had anything to do with what happened to Pink Diamond.

A lot of people have been concerned by White Diamond’s failure to appear at the trial of the gem who was believed to have killed Pink Diamond. It is very suspicious, especially since we know nothing of White Diamond. We only have the very barest of ideas of what she looks like because of the murals on the moon base.

We of course see something of her likeness on Homeworld.

Blue Zircon mentioned during The Trial that Rose Quartz had already been an established threat for a few hundred years. This means that Pink Diamond wasn’t shattered until a few hundred years after the start of the rebellion.

What if the Crystal Gems were losing the war? What if they needed something to turn the tide in their favor? What if they could get their hands on a bargaining chip? In the early stages of the rebellion, there likely weren’t many gems on Rose’s side. It seems possible that, even during the events of The Answer, that Rose and Pearl were the only rebel gems. After all, if they wanted to wage an assault against Blue Diamond and her court, wouldn’t they want to bring more than two gems?

What if they knew they didn’t stand a chance? So they wanted to level the playing field. If only a diamond can shatter a diamond, it’s unlikely that Rose or Pearl would have been able to deal the killing blow. However, that doesn’t mean they can’t destroy a diamond’s physical form.

What if Pearl and/or Rose managed to destroy Pink Diamond’s physical form and took her gem? What if they brought her gem to the diamonds and turned the war into a hostage negotiation? Pink Diamond could be safely returned but only if Homeworld abandoned the Earth. This doesn’t seem like too desperate a tactic, especially if there are only two gems standing against the might of their planet.

What if they tried to bargain with White Diamond? A diamond’s life for a single planet seems like a fair trade. But what if White Diamond wasn’t willing to negotiate. What if White Diamond forsake Pink Diamond, shattering her when her gem was put up for ransom?

After all, we’ve seen a mural depicting a gem of a very great visual similarity to White once before. A mural illustrating Rose Quartz standing before White Diamond, holding something very pink and diamond-shaped between them. All while White Diamond lashes out.

Maybe the reason Pearl gets upset at the mention of Pink Diamond is because they never meant to shatter her; but it was because of their actions that she was shattered at all.

How Long Have They Been in “The Good Place”?

Attempt #1: 25 days (approximately)

              I skimmed over the 1st season, following the context of each episode (how many days they said passed) as well as the different days shown in each episode with day to night and costume changes. I specifically looked at Eleanor and Chidi’s outfits, as Jason and Janet wear the same thing each day and Tahani changes her clothes multiple times in a single day.

Attempt #2: 1 day

Attempt #3: 128 days (likely the most successful attempt)

Attempt #11: 43 days

Attempt #108: .5 days (Eleanor finds out before she’s introduced to The Good Place)

Unknown Attempt #: 1 day (Eleanor finds out at the welcome party)

Unknown attempt #: .5 days (It seems that Eleanor finds out at Orientation)

Attempt #484: 0 days (Michael just rants)

Attempt #649: At least 3 days (Chidi and Eleanor typically meet on day 3)

Unknown Attempt #: 55 days (I’m assuming it’s a different attempt from #649, because Janet’s uniform is different-though she could’ve been rebooted)

Attempt #802: 7 days (Michael says they’re a week in)

Bonus Days:

Mindy St. Claire’s Place: At least 8 days (according to Mindy)

Day Ones: There have been 802 attempts, not counting the 11 attempts we know about, there have been 791 “Day Ones”.

Estimate #1:

Counting all the days we know for a fact happened, they’ve been in “The Good Place” for 1,063 days or close to 3 years.

Estimate #2:

However, by averaging out the days of the 10 attempts (excluding #649) where we know the specific day that they ended on, we have an average number of 25 days (rounding down) per attempt. Which is the same number I calculated for attempt #1, so that seems right.

25 days is the average. So, by multiplying that by the 792 other attempts, we have 19,800 days.

And adding the days we do know about, that is 20,069 days or close to 55 years.

Conclusion:

Eleanor, Chidi, Tahani and Jason have been in the “The Good Place,” anywhere between 3 to 55 years.

Kill Zone

Pairing: Sniper/WildlifeOfficer!Dean x FBIAgent!Reader (AU)

Preview: FBI agent Y/N Singer and her partner Castiel Novak find themselves working on a string of gruesome and cold blooded murders. The angle and precession of the kill shots leads them to enlist the help of an expert in the field - former Us military Captain and elite-sniper , Dean Winchester. However, when tables turn and evidence points fingers at the last person she expected, how does Y/N deal with it?

A/N: For my 6k Celebration I let you guys vote and tell me which series you wanted me to write next. Kill Zone is what you selected.

This is the first time I am going to attempt to write a full blown thriller and I am so happy to believe I can do this. It will have angst, fluff and a bit of smut just like all my series. Just like my series this is a very plot heavy fic though. Buckle up and get ready for a roller coaster ride.

I have never been to Yellowstone, so the places I describe in series might not be accurate and they might not be as close together in real life as I make them seem in my series. Bear with me on that one - the place is only the backdrop of the story.

Thanks to my sweet amazing friend Ana aka @percywinchester27 for being my advisor and beta on this one.

New Cover Art by @jayankles - Thank you :D

***My fics are not to be saved nor posted on any other sites without my express written permission.***

Status: COMPLETED


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Attempts at Flirting

Context: I’m DMing Curse of Strahd and have given the party (because they’re new players) an NPC named Kamala to help them along. One player’s character, Rory (who is a transfemale tielfing rogue/bard), has developed a crush on the NPC and has been trying to flirt with her (though she’s had very little luck). Her first attempt occurred in an inn while Rory and Kamala were sitting together at a table, Rory strumming her lute and Kamala drinking some wine.

Rory: (IC) *glances up from her instrament* You know, I can do a lot more than play a lute with these fingers.

DM: Ooo, clever. Roll for seduction.

Rory: (OOC) …3?

DM (as Kamala): *brief pause* I would hope so. You’re a rogue. *goes back to drinking*

Rory: (IC) *strums lute more sadly*

Later the NPC finds a secret compartment the PCs missed and they’re starting to ask questions about her past.

DM (as Kamala): I know what to look for.

Rory: But you’re not looking hard enough for love!

DM: ….Roll for seduction.

Rory: (OOC) Woo! 19!

DM (as Kamala): …Perhaps I’m not looking.

Rory: (OOC) Aw c'mon!

Finally as the group is walking toward the inn after a long day of questing Rory gets up the nerve to try one more time.

Rory: (IC) *walks up and takes Kamala’s hand*

DM (as Kamala): …What are you doing?

Rory: (IC) I think… you need to let someone in. (OOC) I rolled a… 17?

The whole group is holding their breath, having been not-so-secretly shipping the two characters.

DM (as Kamala): Perhaps… you are right. I just… don’t want to lose someone again. (OOC) Kamala continues to let Rory hold her hand.

And the whole party begun cheering as their ship began to sail.

bakery au (oldie but a goodie)

Part 1

“He hates me,” Bitty moaned, flopping on his couch. Holster was raiding his kitchen, listening to his rant about Jack Zimmermann.

“I don’t even know what I did wrong! Maybe it was because I told him that he played a hard game last night the first time he came into the bakery? All he does is glare at me and say stuff like ‘Eric, the coffee is too sweet,’ or ‘Eric, you need more protein.’”

“Brah, maybe Zimmermann just has a total resting bitch face,” said Holster as he pulled out a leftover pie from Bitty’s fridge. “Guy seems fucking intense. At least he’s good for business.”

“He keeps on glaring at me! And he comes in, like, three times a week. Orders a coffee and just drinks it in his corner, ignores my attempts at conversation even though, mind you, he has already said some pretty rude stuff!”

“The guy’s a celebrity, he probably has his head so far in his ass and doesn’t care about shit, and also just wants some privacy. Bits, you haven’t been taking pictures of him and posting it on twitter have you?” Holster asked, alarmed.

Bitty gasped, “Adam Birkholtz! I would never!”

“Then just treat him like an antisocial customer, he can’t be the only one going to the bakery who doesn’t want conversation and just wants service and food,” Holster said, dropping down next to Bitty on the couch with two tins of pie.

“I know,” Bitty sighs. “He’s just…so handsome. And he was so nice to Nursey when that fool tripped. And he tips generously. And he’s just so gorgeous, even when he’s glaring at me and speaking in grunts whenever I ask him how his day has been. I just want him to like me!”

Holster navigated the TV to a rerun of Golden Girls and handed Bitty one of the pie tins. “I think that’s your problem. You’re an amazing person, Bits, but maybe you can be a bit too friendly for resting bitch face robozoid Zimmermann. Maybe stop asking him about his day and just let him chill.”

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Wait For Me To Come Home - Sebastian x Reader - One Shot

Originally posted by mebeingbored1

A/N - Got myself into the little sebby family mood again. Featuring Isabella as always aha.

Sebastian x Reader - You are completely secure in your relationship with Sebastian, until you start reading some articles that make you doubt yourself. Sebastian gets rid of your insecurities by helping you relive some of your memories together.

Warnings: Fluff and angst  - It’s a long one.

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2

See the big gold chain that I’m rockin’
I got the ring for the bling, not a problem
I got a stash full of cash that I owe to my brother
All up in the club, just to live it up (x)

A Subtle Crush (Tom Riddle x Reader)

Tom’s eyes veered away from his textbooks as he heard a collision in the hallway. He was making his way down to Slughorn’s Potions class, when he witnessed this unexpected mishap.

A girl with (H/L) (H/C) hair was accidentally bumped into by a boy, leading to papers and notebooks flying everywhere. Immediately, the girl bent down to help pick up everything.

“I’m so sorry!” the boy exclaimed, handing over the parchment that didn’t belong to him. “I wasn’t looking -”

“Don’t worry about it!” Her sweet voice replied, a bright smile on her face as she returned the boy’s things as well. Taking her stuff from him, she brushed off her robes and Tom took note of the house colours she wore. “It happens to everyone! Don’t feel bad. Are you okay?”

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We need to talk about mental health.

***TW: Suicide, Mental health***

Yesterday, a 12 year old boy jumped off a bridge in Virginia in the attempt to commit suicide but accidentally killed a 22 year old woman that was driving below by landing on her car.

He survived but has been taken to the hospital with life threatening injuries.

The woman whose name was Marisa Harris was a student in Marymount University in clinical counseling. “This is the type of kid she would been working with” her dad declared.


As a teenager that have been struggling with mental health for years and attempted suicide more than once, I couldn’t help but cry when I read this. I still am.


Waking up after an attempt and understanding you are still breathing is one of the worst pain one is ever to experience (along with the feelings or absence of feelings that depression or/and other mental disorders puts you through, especially if you come to the point of believing the only way to make it stop is to end your life)

but waking up and finding out that you terminated someone else’s existence when you meant to end your own?

I can’t imagine how this boy is feeling right now.

I know my soul would be absolutely broken beyond repair and I would have attempted again the same minute and made sure I’d not wake up this time.

It seriously hits home so hard


And of course the media are only talking about the victim, Marisa (even though my heart goes out to her family as well) Im just all too familiar with the feeling the boy must have been experiencing, the feelings that lead him to believe it was the only way out of the pain, So I can’t help but think that they (the media) should take this ‘opportunity’ to talk about mental health and the thousands and thousands and thousands of people that die from suicide every year. (800 000/year that’s one every 40 seconds.) Not even counting the attempts. (There is one death by suicide for every ~30 attempts.)

It’s the third leading cause of death among 10-24 year olds globally.

Being a part of the LGBTQ community increases 'chances’ of suicide by 6 to 16 percent.

Having experienced sexual harassment/assault/abuse puts you at higher risks too.


Mental disorders don’t discriminate. They can affect anyone, regardless of age, gender, sexual orientation, ethnicity, social status, financial situation etc…


This is a worldwide pandemic that is 100% preventable and that almost nobody seem to want to acknowledge and I’m so fucking sick of it.

the pull of the tides (m)

pairing: park jimin | reader
genre: surfer au / fluff, light smut 
word count: 12,513
description: The expanse of the deep blue sea has always drawn you in. Each ebb and flow of the tides never ceasing to take your breath away. And now, a boy with hair as light as the morning sun and a smile just as bright does too. 
author’s note: i dedicate this to @workofteaguk ‘cuz look girl, it’s finally here! and i also dedicate this to @jamlessness because you told you have yet to write a jimin fic so i wrote one for the two of us! okay, and @wonhopes too because i subjected her to read over this thing kjddghsjdkh <3 

also, bless this post for the inspiration!

Originally posted by lonastic


When you were young, you begged your parents to take you to see the beach. This was your family vacation suggestion every year. All because you wanted to feel the sand between your toes and slip between your fingers and to watch each grain land right back where it was meant to be. And much like those grains of sand falling away from you, those trips seems to go by, and eventually they ceased the older you got.

Since then, being a prime age of twenty now, you’ve long since yearned to return to the beach town you’ve come to know and love for more than its seaside views.

With school out for another few months and nothing but time to kill, you’re actually more than ecstatic to take up a summer job at Bang’s Snack Shack. It’s directly across from the shores, and the view is absolutely amazing. You can see the way the sun reflects against the waters when it’s high up in the sky and when it goes down. The rays of orange and yellows bounce off the blues in a pretty swirl with small dots of people enjoying the waves on long boards. Each of them practically floating as the blue hues carry them across the vicinity until they’re in the safe confines of the wading area.

You enjoy the sight of surfers though you’re definitely no surfer yourself. You just find their ability in skimming the waters on a long piece of polished and colored wood amazing, especially when they’re at the peak of the waves build-up, and suddenly they’re coming back to the sands with bright eyes and grins to match on their sun-kissed skins. There’s just something beautiful in their enamored states, and although you can never truly understand it, you’re happy to witness it with your own two eyes until a customer snaps you back to reality.

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The ghost deer is supposedly a cryptid, that lives in the canyons of Mount Eddy in northern California.

According to legend, when shot at, bullets will fly right through the deer, or miss it. The “animal” also seems to appear and disappear with no traces of it. Attempts have been made to track its prints, only to find that they simply “end” at one point.

The ghost deer, according to legend, is a buck that looks something like a large elk with large antlers ending in 10-12 points, in contrast to the relatively small, normal Californian deer. Most hunters believe it weighs 240 to 250 pounds, though others believe it is actually a ghost.

BTS Reaction - Under the table smut

Seokjin

In all fairness, you started it.  Jin’s wearing a new shirt tonight – it’s salmom coloured and straining to fit across his broad shoulders and chest – and he’d looked so handsome that you just couldn’t help but give his thigh a good squeeze under the table, that squeeze turning into a caress that gradually works it’s way higher the more carried away you get.  Jin isn’t reacting at all, eating calmly, making small talk with the BigHit bosses like you’re barely even there, and it isn’t until you get really frustrated and run your palm across his lap that you realise you’re having any kind of effect at all.  He’s rock hard, member straining against the confining material where it’s tucked to the left as usual, and when you give it a firm squeeze you finally see a tiny slip on Jin’s face; his eye twitching slightly.  While the rest of the men at the table are laughing at a joke he made he takes the chance to yank your hand away by the wrist, hissing in your ear.  

“You just wait till I get you home.  You’re not gonna sit down for a week.”

Originally posted by heyexcusemeee

Yoongi

You’re going to die soon if Yoongi doesn’t give you some relief; you’re fairly certain of that.  He’s been denying you an orgasm for days, bringing you to the brink again and again but always stopping just when it’s getting good, and it’s leaving you a jittery, needy mess.  You’re almost permanently wet and Yoongi won’t even let you wear your underwear, which seems particularly mean when you’ve been invited out for a meal with the other members.  You can tell from the moment you sit down at the table that the very last thing on Yoongi’s mind is food – the smirk he reserves solely for you makes it very clear – and as soon as your bottom hits the chair he’s pulling on the thigh closest to him to open up your legs.  His long, slender fingers slide through your wet folds, alternating between toying with your clit and slipping inside whilst he innocently inspects his menu and you try not to fall apart next to him.  You bite your lip in panic, realising that your orgasm is approaching far too fast for you to stop it, and that this is exactly what he’d been planning when he’d been denying you so fanatically until now.  He leans close to you, pads of his fingers stroking your g-spot, his breath hot in your ear.  

“Cum for me now, babygirl.”

Originally posted by remartins97

Hoseok

Why on earth you ever agreed to combine Hobi’s end of tour with going to dinner at your parents is beyond you.  You haven’t seen each in almost a month and by the way your boyfriend can’t keep his eyes off you, you’re guessing he missed you just as much as you missed him. It’s getting to be a bit of a problem, actually, because even as he’s supposed be impressing your father and charming your mother, Hobi’s having difficulty stopping himself oggling your cleavage, his hand moving restlessly on your thigh under the table.  The moment your parents turn their back he’s all over you, trailing kisses all over your neck and murmuring how much he’s missed you, how delicious you look and how he can’t wait to get you home.  It isn’t long before his over-excited hand starts to glide further up your thigh, fingertips skirting along the edge of your panties as you glance nervously to the kitchen doorway and try to hold back a moan when he pulls them to the side to tease your entrance.  His long finger has only just slipped inside when suddenly your mother calls his name from the kitchen and makes you both jump, Hobi withdrawing his hand so sharply you’d think he’d been burned.  He smiles guiltily at you, rising from his seat to go and help her like she asked; but not before adjusting his erection and sucking your juices off of his finger with a wink.  

“I know what I’d rather be eating tonight, baby.” 

Originally posted by parkjewook

Namjoon

You’re not exactly what made you think that teasing Namjoon would be a good idea.  In a moment of madness you’d decided it was smart to wear that slutty dress you know he hates to dinner with the other members, and to put on that particular shade of lipstick that he’s so fond of smearing around your mouth whilst he fucks your throat.  You go out of your way to order a plate full of pasta that you suck and twirl around your tongue, and strawberries that you put whole into your mouth to take a sumptuous bite out of as you hold Joonie’s unflinching gaze.  When you order a cocktail complete with cherry to finish off the night, twisting the stem around your tongue, his patience finally snaps.  He grabs hold of your hand and shoves it under the table, placing it directly onto his crotch as he glares at you, uncaring whether the other boys notice or not. He’s ridiculously hard, leaking so much pre-cum that it’s started to seep through his boxers and through his trouser leg to form a wet patch.  Namjoon presses your hand down hard against him, biting on his bottom lip and flexing his hips up, disguising it as shifting in his seat.  When you start to palm him in earnest he lets go of your hand and wraps it around the back of your neck instead, squeezing as he leans close to growl lowly in your ear.

“Is this what you wanted, kitten?  You have no idea what I’m gonna do to you once I get you alone.” 

Originally posted by namjoonsgurl

Jimin

From the very moment Jimin had come home tonight he’d been needy.  The whole time you’d been getting ready he’d trailed after you around the apartment, looping his arms around your waist and nuzzling against your neck any chance he got, vying for your attention.  He couldn’t have it, though, not tonight.  Tonight you’re going out with your group of friends for one of their birthdays, and Jimin’s sexual appetite has made you miss enough social events already without missing this one too.  He’s no better at the meal, mewling in your ear that he wants to go and play, deliberately misbehaving in an attempt to break your resolve so you’ll take him home and punish him like he so wants.  His hands are insistent, pawing their way up your thighs under the table no matter how much you try to subtly push him away.  Jimin runs his fingers over the top of your panties, through the outline of your slick folds, and it’s at that moment you decide you’ve had enough. You purposefully drop your cutlery under the table when the cake arrives, knowing everyone will be distracted, and when you sweetly ask him to retrieve it Jimin’s face lights up like all his Christmases have come at once.  He immediately ducks under the table as you slouch in your chair, grabbing a fistful of his hair and pulling his face towards your core, spreading your legs wide. He drags your panties to the side eagerly as he kneels below the table, completely hidden from view, and for the entirety of the time your friends are singing Jimin’s lapping up your juices like he’s a man dying of thirst.  It pains you to push him away when they’re done, drawing him out from under the table with your knife and fork in his hands and a wide smile on his shining lips.    

“You’re so tasty mommy… can I have you instead of cake?” 

Originally posted by mochiipjm

Taehyung

You’ve never spent quite so long getting ready to go out as you have done tonight, and you know it’s all because Taehyung and all his friends are going to be there.  You’ve had your eye on him from the very moment you met, and tonight provides the perfect opportunity for you to find out if he’s interested or not.  You’re sure you’ve caught him looking before, and by the way his mouth drop open and his eyes widen when you walk into the club with a smile and a wave makes you fairly certain that he’s had his eye on you too.  You have a few drinks and dance together for a while, the crowded dance floor giving you the perfect excuse to get up close and personal, your arms around his neck, hips locked together in a slow grind that has his eyes darkening with desire.  When it comes time to sit down there’s no room at the booth for you, but Tae, ever the gentleman, spreads his legs and pats the space in between in invitation, smirking. Gentleman?  Yeah right. As soon as you’re hidden beneath the drink-laden table Taehyung’s hands are on the inside of your thighs, spreading them apart so your dress rides up to your hips and he can slip his fingers past your panties, his erection pressing hard into the small of your back.

“You’re coming home with me, beautiful.”

Originally posted by heyexcusemeee

Jungkook

The thought of being your plus one had initially made Jungkook really nervous. He hadn’t really met many of your family members except your mom and dad, and he’d only met your friends once or twice, so being sat all on his own in the church pews as you walked behind your sister as her bridesmaid wasn’t initially very appealing to him. He soon changes his mind when he sees you though; you look stunning in your floor length gown with its sweetheart neckline, the soft mounds of your breasts almost spilling out over the top as you walk.  The hard-on he gets watching you during the ceremony won’t go away, and by the time you’re sat waiting for your three-course meal he’s becoming increasingly restless.  You ask him what’s wrong as he shifts in his seat, frowning at the pained expression on his face.  His hands disappear under the table cloth for a moment, fumbling with something, and then suddenly he’s pulling your hand under there too.  You have to hold back a gasp when he guides your hand onto his throbbing cock, moving it up and down the length of him under the table, the button and fly of his pants hanging wide open.  It’s so sinful, touching him like this in public, not even the barrier of clothes in the way.  If someone lifted the tablecloth now they’d see his heavy member resting in your palm, the pre-cum leaking from the tip, and they’d understand why Jungkook is clenching his jaw so hard, a deadly serious look on his face.  

“Don’t stop Jagi.  I’ll warn you before I cum.”

Originally posted by weightliftingfairyparkjimin

@btsiguess - here you go sweetie <3 <3

The next time Grandpa grumbles about having to walk uphill to school every day, whip out this pic and show his ass what “uphill” truly looks like.

What you’re seeing above is the single route to get to Atuler, a clifftop village in southwest China. What you’re also seeing is children as young as six years old making the nearly half-mile ascent home via treacherous paths and that rickety-ass wooden ladder. It’s as scary as it looks; a reporter dispatched to the village reportedly burst into hysterical tears while attempting the climb (admittedly, tears are one of several liquids we’d burst into, were we to try). Meanwhile, the village’s schoolchildren regularly and fearlessly pull off this 90-minute reenactment of Cliffhanger, with heavy book bags in place of Stallone’s weighty pecs.

Atuler is home to a mere 72 families, most of whom make their living farming chili peppers. Though by the villagers’ own tally, they’ve “only” tragically lost seven or eight of their number to the murderous, greedy hand of gravity, many more have been horrifically injured by falls, and this combined with recent media attention spurred the Chinese government to make the climb safer. They did so by replacing the homemade (and oft-rotted) wooden ladder with a much sturdier (but equally terrifying) metal one, because no one ever said that safety couldn’t be accompanied by shitted pants.

The 6 Most Terrifying Morning Commutes In The World

Ok but fairies don’t like iron so clearly Irn Bru was created as a modern urban solution to Scotland’s fairy problem.

I mean think about it, very few stories have cropped up of people being taken by the Good Neighbours since the late nineteenth century which coincides with the rise of popular health tonics like iron brews, while the precursor to THE Irn Bru was brought out in 1901. 

This ALSO coincides with the lifetimes of individuals such as Andrew Lang (who of course published a version of Robert Kirk’s Secret Commonwealth, and Kirk was one of those reputed to have been taken by the fairies) and the prominence of Victorian cutesy fairy tradition may have brought public attention to very real, malevolent and not particularly cutesy human-fairy issues in the contemporary world, sparking an effort to end abductions.

The Good Neighbours cannot have been particularly happy about this, not least because it’s status as ‘Scotland’s Other National Drink’ threatened the position of their own invention, whisky, from which they still draw massive revenues (because obviously Scotch whisky is supernatural, how else would it be the best, and it is well-known that those who imbibe have a greater chance of seeing the Fair Folk). Various attempts to placate fairy distillers have taken place over the years however, and to bring the two communities together, with much greater success since devolution and the founding of the Scottish parliament (the fairy community being considered an embarrassment and marker of backwardness by the Scots at the time of the Act of Union, so attempts were made to hide them from Westminster, though not always successfully). 

One particularly prominent symbol of improved relations between the communities is the famous snowman Christmas advert, conceived as a metaphor for human and fairy cooperation (the snowman being animated by magic, though hiding behind the conventional Christmas imagery of Raymond Briggs’ classic). However it has been an established principle in Scots law since at least 1946 that humans who have taken regular doses of irn bru are off-limits and unable to be “invited” to the fairy world without fully understanding what they’d got into (whisky drinkers are plainly related to ancient bardic traditions and thus much more likely to go looking for such experiences than the sober), thus lessening the chance of nasty diplomatic situations. 

Drink your irn bru kids, unless you want to be taken by the fairies

but I don't ever think I can ever learn how to love just right

requested by anonymous

andreil au in which neil gets tired of the ‘we’re nothing’ game and decides to stop playing


It isn’t much of a surprise when one of the foxes gets hurt on the court. While running drills, they’re often teamed up against each other, working of defensive and offensive maneuvers. And while they don’t mean to hurt each other, Exy is a violent sport, and accidents happen. Most of the time they’re accidents, at least.

Today’s incident is a legitimate accident; in a scuffle for the ball, the handle of Dan’s racket catches Neil’s helmet, tugging it off and sending him crashing to the floor. She fawns over him with apologies, helping him back to his feet, ignoring his attempts to wave her off.

He’s only been on his feet for two seconds when Andrew pushes through, tipping his chin up with a finger, likely to get the bleeding to stop.

“I’m sorry, Neil, I swear-“ Dan exclaims, peering around Andrew, who, though tiny, still manages to take up a huge amount of space in front of Neil.

“It’s okay. Really,” He says.

“Your nose is broken,” Andrew says.

“Hell, Dan. Remind me not to piss you off,” Nicky says, a teasing smile on his lips. Matt shoots him a look, to which Dan crinkles her nose, grip tightening on her racket.

“You know-“

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queersong  asked:

ok I have a TERRIBLE time following all the goings on in night vale can you kind of..explain or summarize what's happening with these different realities

Sorry that it has taken me so long to get around to replying! I’ve been rushed off my feet (which is also why the blog is inactive at the moment), but realised I ought to reply before a new episode potentially confuses things further.

So! 

Main Reality
Presuming that all previous episodes have taken place in the same reality, this is - for all intents and purposes - our original Night Vale.

At this moment in time, a whole host of alternate realities are bleeding into this reality through tears. It seems that individuals can cross into these realities (young!Cecil in Filings and main!Cecil in Cal), and potentially even stay in them indefinitely (Dana in Cal).

The consequences of all these timelines colliding are not yet known.

Cassette Reality 
The reality of young!Cecil originally introduced in Cassettes

It seems much the same to the main!Reality, to the point where main!Cecil thought he had simply forgot the events. However, young!Cecil mentions having a brother rather than a sister like main!Cecil, and seems to meet an unpleasant end in the final recording.

In Filings, the realities of young!Cecil and main!Cecil cross yet again, with the former working as an intern for the latter. It is revealed that main!Cecil is the flickering shadow that young!Cecil reported in his apparently ill-fated recording. Though, main!Cecil is unable to prevent the event from transpiring, and a bathroom mirror was left smashed as a result.

(Phew!)

Cal Reality
The reality that main!Cecil finds himself in Cal.

Cal is revealed to be Cecil’s brother in this reality. 

Cecil recalls that him and Cal were troublemakers in their childhood, and were involved in petty crime. Along with this, Cecil begins to forget about Carlos. This suggests that people from different realities will take on the memories of that reality whilst forgetting about their own.

Cal appears to be suffering from radiation poisoning or something similar. This suggests that doomsday event in 1983 occurred in this reality.

Notably, this could potentially be the same reality as the Cassette Reality. It is the only other instance we have heard of Cecil having a brother.

Mini Reality
A potential reality from which the mini!Night Vale beneath the bowling alley might have originated.

The mini!Cecil is a lot more subdued than main!Cecil, and is closer to being a more “traditional” radio broadcaster. He delivers a weather report rather than the usual music, and attempts to give a traffic report even though there is no change in traffic.

The mini!Night Vale may have been transferred from its own reality by Huntokar (known as their god) to save it from the 1983 event.

Additional Things
So far, Carlos has only appeared in the Main Reality.

With the difficulty citizens of main!Night Vale have when it comes to leaving, they could be in a similar situation to mini!Night Vale.

If the Cassette Reality and Cal Reality are one and the same, then the event at the end of young!Cecil’s recordings could have been related to what transpired in 1983.

In Deft Bowman, main!Cecil discovers two different headlines for the same day in 1983. One with the destruction of Nulogorsk, and one about normal town events. This could either be a cover-up, or another example of something bleeding through from another reality. 

Don’t think I have it all here, but really need to get back to work! Hope this helps!

Im Yours | Part One

A/N Alrighty, here it is. Part one of the Im Jaebum Mafia series. Im so excited about this and I can’t wait to write more. I hope you all love it as much as I do

Pairing: Jaebum x Reader

Rating: Drama, Angst, Smut, Fluff

WARNINGS: Language, Eventual Violence, Lots of Smut Later on

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |

He laid atop his blankets, clutching to his sides. The pain ripping through his abdomen was enough to make him feel like he was shot. He’d much rather be shot. Anger was heavy in his chest as he thought about the events from earlier in the day:

He stood at the head of his table, narrowed eyed and heavy handed like he always was as he screamed at the men who sat lazily around him. He had almost finished informing his men of the large shipment of weapons that they were going to have to some how discreetly remove from the now police swarmed dock when the pain in his side started.

He blinked, not wanting to give any sign of weakness in front of the men who itched for the position his father had left for him.

‘That will be all. Get out of my house.’ He spit as a chorus of 'yes sir’s’ rang through the room.

He turned quickly when the last one had left to pour him self something, anything to take the pain away but before he could even reach out for a bottle, the glass in his hand fell out as he clutched to his side.

“Fuck!’ He yelled. Soon, two of his right hand men were by his side and lifting him up. Jackson supported him, his knees now shaking with the pain while Jinyoung ran his hands over his body, checking just incase someone somehow did something.

'Mr. Im, all your symptoms will disintegrate if you please just listen to me.’ Chulsoo, the groups personal and trusted doctor said with pleading eyes.

’'He’s not saying you have to become a grass eating hippie, for fucks sake.’  Jinyoung barked from the corner of the room where he sat with his arms crossed.

"Shut up.” he said, clutching to his still aching side.

“Look, Mr. Im. Theres a family, the head is a close friend of mine and they do personal catering. Here,’ He started while reaching into his pocket for his wallet. He pulled a small grey embossed card out and started to hand it to him before deciding against it and handing the card over to Jinyoung. 'Their quiet, they’ll come, cook and leave. You need to start taking care of yourself before others or you won’t be with us much longer.’

That was all he said before collecting his things and standing to make his way out of the room, Jinyoung following him.

He laid there, eyes still bore as the pain kicked up again, though now it was muted by the pain killers Chulsoo had given him. He scoffed at himself. '22 fucking years old and I’m bed ridden for my eating habits.’ he thought to himself, getting even more angry.

'Jaebum, I called them. There will be someone here tomorrow morning.’


"Y/n! We have a house call tomorrow morning. One of Chulsoo’s patients who needs a controlled diet. I figured since you finished with the Parks you would like to take on this family.” Your dad said, walking into the kitchen to see you already prepping for the family dinner you were about to have in your childhood home.

“Sure, why not.” You mumbled, dusting your hands from the chopped onion that had made its way from your knife to your hand.

“Only if you want to though. We can always give it to the company.” He said sitting down in front of you, the same time you mom walked into the kitchen.

“No I can do it, I need the money anyways.” You said smiling before turning your back to him to dump the onion in the already hot pan.

Dressed and ready the next morning you threw your favorite apron over your shoulder and tucked the knives your dad had gotten you for your last birthday under your arm before locking the door to your apartment and heading down to the first floor of your apartment building. The man you had communicated with after dinner told you they would send a car. You figured it’d be a taxi- Uber at best, but when a large black SUV rolled up your eyebrows rose.

A lanky, but very well dressed man stepped out of the vehicle, his flaming red hair slightly blowing out of place by the sudden wind.

“You must be y/n.” He said, his plump lips curving to form a child like grin. You nodded and stepped forward, accepting his help as he took your things from your hands.

“You can call me BamBam.” He said holding a hand out for you to enter the car.

“BamBam?” You smirked. “Thats an interesting name, why do they call you that?” You asked, not being able to put a lid on your loud mouth was something you had a problem with.

“You don’t want to know.” He winked before hooking his seatbelt.

The drive was pretty much quiet. You signed deeply and twiddled your thumbs wishing that you could have a better view of the scenery that was passing by quickly, but due to the dark tint of the windows there was no point in straining your eyes. Every once in a while you’d turn your head to look at BamBam who’s goofy smile that greeted you had faded into a stern smolder. You sighed again.

“Were here.” BamBam said clicking his seatbelt  before picking up your knives and sliding out of the car. You hadn’t even realized you had turned down a long straight driveway that was lined with thick trees. That would have been so pretty to drive through. You thought to yourself, still a little sour about the whole tinted windows thing.

You turned from looking at the driveway to looking at the house. It was very impressive, rich red brick that had a thin blanket of ivy running up one corner. There must have been at least fourteen windows across the top floor which, if every room had two windows, would mean in the front of the house alone there were seven rooms.

“How many am I cooking for anyways?” You said. You clearly heard your father say ONE of Chulsoo’s patients.

“There are seven of us in the house. Were all big boys though we can make our own food. You’re only responsible for cooking for one of us.” BamBam said as he led you through the front doors that the driver had opened for you.

The house was bright and homey inside with a modern twist. It was almost like walking into a museum the way art hugged every wall and statues were nestled in every corner. You couldn’t help but admire the open floor of the foyer. On either side of the large room was a stair case that met in the middle, and standing at the very top was a man.

His gaze on you made a chill run up your spine, but you couldn’t look away. His head was tilted slightly to the side as he watched you, his hair that had a slight wave to it parted in the middle to create a heart shape around his sharp features. His plump red lips were where your eyes stopped though, the way they twitched slightly in attempt to smile made you shift your weight. He bowed slightly after the few seconds that felt like hours passed, just as BamBam called your name.

“This way, lets go.” He said pulling his head to one side, indicating you to follow him through the hallway that formed under the staircase.

You’re eyes widened at the kitchen. Having cooked your entire life and with the few years of being able to call yourself a professional chef under your belt you had been in a lot of kitchens, a lot of really nice kitchens. But this one… This one was different. You hardly had time to take in the large granite island that formed in the center of the kitchen before BamBam was demanding your attention again.

“So, what were you thinking for breakfast?” He said just as another man walked in.

“He requested an omelette.” He said sternly causing BamBam to press his lips together, trying to stifle a laugh. The new man seemed less than impressed with BamBams efforts. You watched him as he took a deep long breath.

“Everything you need is in the fridge and or cupboards. BamBam will stay here with you for most of the day until you have a hang of where everything is. One of the others will bring you meal orders as the time come and goes.” He said before bowing slightly and turning to walk back out of the room.

“What’s up his ass?” You said reaching for the fridge. BamBam snorted slightly causing you to smile while placing four eggs on the counter.

“So are you all brothers in here?” You asked after thanking him for pointing out the cabinet the pans were in

“Basically.” He said resting his chin on his fists.

“Basically? So your not?” You stated turning back to the fridge where you unloaded spring onions, pancetta and a sharp cheddar for the omelette.

“Basically.” He said again.

“So is this just like a fraternity house where you all walk around in suits all day?” You asks raising one eyebrow as you began to dice the onions.

“That’s one way to put it.” He said.

You sighed at the fact the conversation wasn’t going anywhere and quickly cracked the eggs into a bowl, scrambled them, added a touch of milk and poured it into the hot pan. It didn’t take long for the kitchen to fill with the smell of melting cheese and hot pancetta, the combination of meat and cheese, as BamBam informed you, was already making his mouth water.

“I can make you one too, might as well since your stuck in here with me all day.” You smiled flipping the omelette once more before plating it.

“Um yes?” BamBam asked sitting up straighter as he watched you garnish the plate with sliced oranges.

Picking up the plate you walked it around the large island but before you were able to reach BamBam two boys walked in, stepping in your way.

“What is that!” The shorter one said pointing to the plate.

“Bosses breakfast.” BamBam said meeting you and taking the plate. “Outta here.” He said moving his head to the door.

“I want an omelet!” The taller said holding a hand out to you. BamBam looked back to you and watched you shrug. He whispered something for just them to hear before saying he’d be right back. You watched the two take a seat behind the island where BamBam once was and you nodded turning back to the fridge to pull out 12 eggs this time. The feeling of the two unnamed boys watching you chop made you a little uncomfortable, but thankfully BamBam returned quickly.

“That one better be for me.” BamBam said coming around to sit on the counter behind you, his long legs hanging off haphazardly. You nodded and smiled at him as you added the extras.

“No! I’m so hungry I haven’t been able to eat anything since yesterday!” The shorter one raised his voice.

“Hyung! She offered it to me first so shut it!” BamBam said, the same goofy grin meeting his lips.

They spent so much energy fighting over who was going to get the first omelette they didn’t even notice you plate the cooked egg, cut another orange up and place it I front of the quiet tall one.

“Ah! Thank you so much.” He said giving you a toothy grin.

“Thank you for behaving in my kitchen.” You smiled.

“Y/n, really!?” BamBam said pouting.

“Now I’m never gonna eat.” The other said.

“Let me show you a secret.” You said bending back over to the cabinet the pans were in. You pulled out another small pan and placed it on the burner.

“Problem solved!” The shorter one said with a smile.

“Just make sure to give me mine before Jackson’s.” BamBam said causing Jackson to groan.

“So we have BamBam, Jackson, Mr. Stick up his ass… what’s your name?” You asked the taller one as he piled another bite into his mouth. He looked wide eyed at Jackson before looking at BamBam.

“She met Jinyoung.” He said laughing. Jackson joined him. But the taller one just raised his eyebrows and turned back to his omelet.

“I’m Yugyeom.” He said with another sweet smile. “And this is incredible.” He said pointing at the half gone omelette.

By the time you plated BamBam and Jacksons breakfast and made sure BamBam had his in his hands before Jackson two more boys had entered the kitchen. Introducing themselves as Mark and Youngjae they placed a dirty plate on the counter before eyeing everyone else eating as well.

“Boss wanted us to tell you that he enjoyed the breakfast.” Mark said.

“Would you two also like an omelette?” You asked with a chuckle. With how quickly their eyes snapped towards you, you took that as a yes and went to work.

“How about stick up-” you paused when BamBam gave you a wide eyed look. “I mean Jinyoung? Would he like one?”

“If he’s not in here probably not.” Yugyeom said sitting back in his chair.

Lunch was just just the same, as soon as you plated the seasoned chicken over a strawberry spinach salad and BamBam left to deliver the food, everyone else flooded into the kitchen.

The only difference with dinner was this time Jinyoung joined them. You wouldn’t be able to help yourself, every time he spoke you’d look at BamBam who’d give you a side eye and the two of you tried to fight off a laugh, usually by busying yourself with cleaning something up.

“Boss really liked your food. He wouldn’t admit it cause he’s proud but he was definitely looking forward to his next meal.” BamBam said in the now empty kitchen, he had offered to help you wash things and now was sheething your knifes.

“Will I ever meet this Mr. Boss person?” You asked, thinking back to the man on the stairs and wondering if that was him.

“Hes a really privet person. It doesn’t help that he’d nose deep in work 24/7” He said handing you your bundle of knives just as his name was called.

“Get her home. We have a.. a meeting.” Mark said sternly before bowing at you slightly and smoothing his suit as he walked away.

The car ride home was a little bit more fun as you and BamBam spit balled ideas for meals the following day. It seemed like every other idea he sent your way either involved lots of sugar or lots of bloody meat.

“BamBam Im supposed to be keeping the boss man healthy.” You said making him chuckle again.

“He seemed to already be feeling better by the end of the day.” He said scratching his arm.

“Then Im doing my job,” You started smiling. Just then the car pulled up to the curb infant of your apartment and you started to collect your things. “See you tomorrow?”

“Bright and early. Goodnight y/n.”

IN PREPARATION FOR THE YULE BALL [DRACO MALFOY]

request: “18 + 22 with Draco Malfoy plz?” — by @harley-with-gegs-quinn

a/n: again, let’s pretend they’re not 14-year-olds in this imagine lol

18. “Sorry, but I don’t really care anymore.”
22. “Out of all the possible people, why you?”

PART 2

Masterlist + Request here! 

    Everyone was staring at Professor McGonagall either like she was a gift from the heavens or was giving them another load of heavy school work. You admit that you were one of few students who were looking at her admirably, not even lying that you were looking forward for this Yule Ball that she was speaking of in accordance with the Triwizard Tournament.

    Supposedly, it was Professor Snape who was to explain the details since he was the head of your house, but because he had ‘something else much more important to attend to’, it was the Transfiguration teacher who volunteered to explain.

    “Y/L/N.” a familiar drawling voice said all of the sudden, and despite the fact that the boys and girls weren’t sitting with each other — the girls on the left, the boys on the right, while there was a huge space in the middle where Professor McGonagall was still explaining — Draco managed to stand beside you with a smug look on his face.

    “Malfoy.” you copied his tone, not even looking at him.

    “Bet no one has asked you yet, huh, Y/L/N?” he snickered. “Wouldn’t blame them, to be honest. Who would want to go out with you when they can bring a better date?”

     You flickered your eyes to him and glared. “Funny for you to say that, Malfoy. Since rumor has it that you’re taking Parkinson.”

    He sneered. “At least, I get to take someone. Unlike you.”

    “How are you so sure that no has asked me yet? You know, if you keep on making assumptions like that, you might as well replace Professor Trelawney.”

    You weren’t lying about your statement, of course, but it didn’t mean that you already had a date. Even though there have been various boys gaining up the courage in attempt to bring you to Yule Ball with them, you have declined all of them politely. Why? You weren’t sure yourself.

    “Oh, is that so? Who’s the miserable guy then?” asked Draco.

    You crossed your arms. “I don’t know why I should tell you.”

    He grinned abruptly. “You’re lying. It’s obvious that you are since you’re not telling me.”

    “Believe what you want to believe, but I’m still not telling you.”

    The two of you glared at each other as if having a staring contest, seeing who would break away first. No one did though, both driven by pride, that it was Professor McGonagall who successfully broke your disgusted gazes on each other when she abruptly spoke.

     "Ah, Miss Y/L/N and Mr Malfoy, as it seems that you are the only two left, you’ll be partners.“ she held your wrists, dragging you two to the dance floor where many students were already awkwardly dancing with each other.

    It took you a minute to realize that bickering with Draco a while ago prevented you from listening to the teacher’s instruction to pick a partner and practice with them in dancing. Professor McGonagall was no woman to question so the both of you just stood there with your jaws hanging in protest, the said professor moving on to another pair.

    Draco furrowed his eyebrows. ”Out of all the possible people, why you?“ he demanded, composing himself much quicker than you did.

    "This is all your fault.” you gritted your teeth. “If you weren’t such an obnoxious scumbag, this wouldn’t have happened.”

    “Typical of you, Y/L/N. You’re blaming someone else for your own stupid mistakes.”

    “Well, what can I say? I got it from you.” you scowled.

    “Y/L/N, Malfoy! What are you two doing? Oh my goodness, you’re still not even in positions.” Professor McGonagall had returned to your post.

    Suddenly, she grabbed one of Draco’s hands and placed them firmly on your waist before taking another one of yours and putting it on Draco’s shoulder.

    “There. Now —” she literally forced both of your free hands to hold each other —"follow the beat of the music and dance with each step at a time.“

    You huffed a breath just as the professor leaves once again, now approaching Goyle and Pansy whose eyes were sending daggers at your direction, clearly annoyed that you were dancing with the person she liked.

    "Watch it, Y/L/N.” you heard Draco hiss that made you look at him and realize that you had stepped on his foot.

    You gave him a sarcastic smile. “Sorry, but I don’t really care anymore.

    “I do, and it’d be great if my feet weren’t swollen on the night of the dance itself.” he retorted.

    After that, it seemed that you and Draco had ran out of insults to say, for neither one of you bothered to say a word while dancing slowly and unwillingly with each other. You were actually quite surprised as the song continued and found yourself being led by Draco, who was a fine dancer himself.

    You oddly stared at him.

    “How do you know how to dance?” you couldn’t help but ask, gaining his attention from the floor.

    It was the first time he answered you in a serious manner for the day that you made it a point to listen carefully.

    “Father gets invited to a lot of fancy parties and balls. Obviously, as his son, I needed to learn if I didn’t want to just stay in the corner and sulk.”

    He suddenly twirled you around and brought you back a little bit closer than before, making you gulp. Draco noticed this and smirked.

    “Nervous, Y/L/N?” said Draco in a low voice.

    “No.” you denied immediately, even though your heart was already leaping out of your chest.

    “Sure, sure.” he chuckled and abruptly dipped you down, catching you off guard once again.

    The hold you had on his shoulder tightened, as well as the grip that you had on his hand. Draco was amused by your lack of skills that when he lifted you back up, he stopped leading for a moment to look at you closely.

    “Do you really have a date already?”

    You were taken back by his question. “Why are you so interested in knowing?”

    Draco shrugged and continued to dance, bringing you along the beat. “Because I’m not taking Parkinson and —”

    You widened your eyes. “And you’re asking me?”

    He cleared his throat. “Well, you proved that you’re not the worst out there, and really I’ve been meaning to ask you since earlier but … if you don’t want, I can find somebody else.”

    “You have a knack of trying to ask someone to the dance.” you sarcastically said.

    “Yeah, I’ve been told.” he returned a sarcastic smile.

     You sighed. “Uh — okay, I’ll go with you. If you’d stop being a git, that is.”

     "No promises.“ Draco grinned and once more, spun you around, pulling you back with only little space to spare between your faces.

anonymous asked:

can you bless us w some sns headcanons

- Sasuke brings Naruto all sorts of gifts from his travels, anything that reminds him of Naruto.

- Naruto steals Sasuke’s shirts all the time. Because ‘They’re comfortable’

more like they smell like Sas and he loves that

- Sasuke never forgets any anniversaries. 

- Naruto cries during their first kiss. 

- Their attempts at cooking together are a mess. They always end in ridiculous food fights and stolen kisses. 

- Naruto is totally the type to say “I can’t believe you like me back and we’re dating.” even though it’s been three years.

- Shikamaru has learned to knock the door before coming into the Hokage office (the hard way). 

- They rebuild the Uchiha compound and turn it into an orphanage for all the war orphans.

- They adopt three kids of their own.

- Whenever they have fights, one usually sends the other to sleep on the couch but eventually ends up joining the other in the middle of the night with a “not a word” look on their face. 

Bard College: College of the Macabre

as a celebration of 600+ followers and also for fun, i’ve been working on homebrew necromancy-based subclasses for as many of the magic-using classes as possible. i’m so in love with bards that i happened to finish this one first :) i hope you guys like this quick homebrew of mine, and let me know if i should edit some things! i’m not perfect, and concrit is always welcome. let me know which class i should homebrew for next!

special thanks to @probablybardrpgideas​ and @probablyeyerpgideas​ for helping me iron out some of the details on this. this college was based on the artistic genre of the danse macabre; read more about it here


The College of the Macabre calls to those bards who wish for their song to reach past death and revel at the grey areas of mortality. Some say that the first bard of this college was taught by Vecna himself, when the lich rose to godhood and began whispering to his followers. In recent years, some bards of this college have striven to erase what they consider as their shameful history, seeking to show that their arts aren’t as dark as their origins claim. Despite their efforts, the bards of this college are seen with some level of terrified respect and fear. Though the more heroic bards have been able to fight back against some prejudice, using their magic to force beasts as large as dragons into an exhausting, never-ending dance, more villainous bards have used their skills to attempt to raise vast armies of undead, setting them upon villages and claiming more lives in the name of their one-eyed deity.

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