Fanfiction is a really weird thing.
Last June, I started writing what eventually turned out to be my longest fic yet. It took me three months to write it, during which I almost gave up on it several times, and the end result was just under 10k. I know that’s but a short chapter compared to what some writers produce, but for me, it was a labour of love.
I just read the story again tonight. And you know what? It’s damn good. I’d go so far as to say it’s the best thing I’ve ever written. It’s not necessarily a great piece of work in the grand scheme of things. Another fic writer with more skill could do an even better job. But for me, this was honestly as good as it gets. I had multiple scenes with a dozen characters, and had to describe movement and action as well as thoughts and words, which I always find tricky.
You might think me very conceited for saying this (and that’s your right), but I am very proud of that particular fic. I wonder if I’ll ever write anything as good as it again.
The irony is that out of the 37 stories I’ve now written, this one has been read the least. I have one story with fewer hits, but it was only published yesterday, so give it time :-)
So yeah, fanfiction is a weird thing.
The main upshot of this is that I’m not gonna write fics in this fandom again. I started one today, wrote about 500 words then deleted it and went to work on something else. I honestly don’t see the point in expending so much creative effort on something that produces so little response. It was my least favourite of the three fandoms I’ve been writing for, so at the end of the day, it’s no big loss for it or for me.
This post should not be taken as a bitter complaint, because that’s really not what I intend it to be. I just want readers to understand that there is a person behind the page, and if you can’t take the time to press that little heart button at the bottom, don’t be surprised when new content no longer appears.