We had a fucking fantastic weekend at Fred and Sarah’s place. It still seems crazy that I am now so attached to two people who I had never met before Thursday night. I knew Matt and Fred were bofyriends and madly in bro love, but other than that I didn’t go into this knowing much more than what we all know from their Tumblrs. However, from the moment they picked us up at the airport they were friendly, fun, loud, normal, welcoming, and awesome. Sarah brought me to her bridal party and bachelorette party, Fred cooked for me and yelled at me, the dogs attacked my face constantly with their tongues, and I got to see old and new friends who mean even more to me now. I’m going to shut up soon and just give you a few highlights:

  • Fred & Sarah’s cooking and baking
  • Dog heaven
  • winning the “Who Knows Sarah Best” game at the bridal shower 24 hours after meeting Sarah 
  • telling a poop story at the (tea party) bridal shower to a dead silent reaction from the other guests
  • Sarah’s dad and the frozen shark
  • going out to bars in only a twin bed sheet and a belt
  • drunk passing out in bed with Sarah
  • “I think Erika is going to steal our dog”
  • beating Matt at Mel-burger-eating
  • whipped cream vodka and cheap bourbon
  • kolachis
  • Mac sleeping in the driveway
  • a very special beer run

Anyway, totally gay for these people and this was terribly uninteresting for anyone who wasn’t there this weekend. SORRY I’M NOT SORRY. 

This was the first time I met Fred. We fell in love immediately but he decided to fall in love with Sarah instead. And I’m happy he did because he found the girl of his dreams. The way he talks about her, the way they look at each other, the way they support each other through thick and thin, well it’s just…perfect.

This Friday Erika (the girl of my dreams after Fred left me) and I get to see them get married. It’s a wedding I am so happy to be a part of because they are perfect for each other. Which means I’m going to cry a lot.

I love you guys so much. You are some of the best friends anyone can ask for and I can’t wait to hug you and be there to share this wonderful experience together. There will be many more wonderful experiences I’m sure for you, and this is only the beginning.

Liquid diet sucks my nonexistent balls. Day three.

  • I haven’t thrown up since Monday, which is awesome. 
  • So hungry all the time I could slit all of your throats to steal the food from your food porn pics. But really, what good would that do? I couldn’t eat it. 
  • Slimfast is marginally less disgusting now that it doesn’t taste like a metal can. What took them so long to do that?
  • It’s still pretty gross. Vitamins man. I need them. 
  • theothersarah wanted faces. DOUBLE FACE POST. 
  • If the rest of today goes well I may start to nibble on little things again tomorrow. We’ll see. 
  • You would think an upside to this would be weight loss. I haven’t checked but I’m not noticing that. FUCKERY. 
  • I love you guys a little bit. Don’t let it go to your fucking heads. 

You guys I stayed at Fred and Sarah’s hosue this weekend and had an amazing time with awesome people and adorable dogs but you’re going to have to wait until tomorrow for a properly gay post about it because I need to organize the pictures I want to shove in your faces. Thank you for your understanding.

pet peeve tuesday

When distant family members get all butt hurt when you don’t invite them to any of your gatherings/events. They don’t socialize or communicate with you but as soon as they hear you have something going on they want to be included. No, I’m not sorry it doesn’t work that way. People invite those they want to share the moment with.

The mail came. It kind of freaked me out.  There was a letter that looked like it had traveled really far to get to me. Seriously, far. It was torn and like someone desperately tried to bend it.  But the freaky part was that it was my handwriting. I stared at trying to remember if I had sent myself anything and thinking that would be weird.  Maybe a future self was trying to send me a message. Totally weird.  

So I opened it. It is Sarah and Fred’s wedding invitation.  I forgot that I had written the addresses out of the envelops for them. I guess it was my future self sending me a message to put down the candy and work on fitting in my dress. 

I got tagged on a Question thingie!

Questions for the Tagged.

I was tagged by raystarfree 

Rule 1: Always post the rules. 

Rule 2: Answer the questions and write 10 new ones. 

Rule 3: Tag 10 new people. 

Rule 4: Let them know you tagged them.

01> It’s been a terrible day, and all you want to do is curl up somewhere with a bowl of ___? 

Bowl? Why a bowl of something? I eat chocolate, so I guess it could be a bowl of Nutella!

02> You look across the room, something catches your eye and makes your heart go a- flutter. Who, or, what, would it be?

A tiny puppy! I want a Mini Pinscher! Someday maybe. It’s not gonna happen any time soon.

03> Salt bath or bubble bath?

Depends on the mood. Probably salt bath.

04> If you could choose to learn another language, what would it be? Why?

French or Italian. I started with french when I was a teen, sadly I never ever pursued it. Italian just sounds divine. And eventually I want to move to Italy.

05> What motivates you? Really. Like, what makes you want to wake up and get out of bed?

I’ve been struggling with this lately. Feeling unmotivated and stuff. But I guess looking to the future with Suiz. Seeing the amazing things we could do together.

06> Would you rather write a successful book series, or star in the movies based on those books?

What a difficult question! I love reading, but I’m also a very graphic person. I’m a designer wanna be make up artist, so I would love to direct/photography/makeup effects the movie.

07> Would you rather be somewhere you’ve always wanted to be, surrounded by strangers? Or somewhere you strongly dislike with someone you care deeply about?

At this point of my life? Probably somewhere I love to go surrounded by strangers. Strangers can become friends. A place you hate will always be a place you hate. The fact that I’m trying to move out of this place kinda influence this decision. 

08> Would you consider being in a relationship with a person whom you have great sexual chemistry and who can fulfill your every carnal desire, but is incapable of love?

Definitely not. Love and companionship is crucial for me. Sex just takes the back seat. Sex you can fix, sex you can learn and teach. Love has to be felt.

09> If you have children, and you had the power to motivate and guide their education and career choices, what would they be?

Motivate? Maybe yes. Influence? God no. I want them to be whatever they want, unless they become lawyers. That I wouldn’t allow. (just kidding)

10> You look in the mirror, and you gaze deeply into your own eyes. What do you see? What do you think about?

Right now? Downward spiral into depression and failure. But I’m working on it! Trying to make things better and happier.

My questions:

  1. What makes you happy? (The little things)
  2. Would you choose the person you love over your career?
  3. Cat or dog person? Why?
  4. Zombie apocalipse. Where would you go, what would you take, who would you go with?
  5. If you could move anywhere in the world where would it be and why?
  6. Do you shower everyday? (By the way you should)
  7. Why did you join tumblr?
  8. What is your best childhood memory?
  9. What skill would you love to have?
  10. Superpowers: What would you pick?