then come crying about it with me

bearblogging  asked:

I had a woman come in asking about our blended coffees (we recently changed them a lot of people are pissed) and after trying to talk the drink up, she saw the price. I thought she was going to have a stroke. I apologized profusely and she said "it's fine, you dont create these outrages prices" and having someone realize that and not blame me almost made me cry.

Syd Tries FanFiction: The Blarke Reunion

So fair fucking warning I have never in my life written fic before, but I typed this out for @clxrkblake tonight so we could cry and she told me to post it so I’m gonna. Basically this was my ideal, dream reunion before I saw the finale. (I’ve changed my mind about a few things since we saw the new ship but whatever I’ll still dream of this reunion every night for the next 9 months.)

So anyway, I wrote this up in like 30 minutes and there’s probably lots of typos, but deal with it and then come cry with me. <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bellamy sits by the window like he does every year, looking at the planet he used to call home. The glass in his hand is almost empty by now. It almost makes up for the whole thats still in his heart. It almost, for a second makes him forget she isn’t there beside him, that they never got that drink. 

He starts the same as he does every year. “I miss you. It’s been 6 years and I still miss you every day. You’d be so proud of everyone. Even Murphy.” He wipes at the tears collecting in his eyes. It never gets easier.

“I just wish… I wish I’d have told you when we had the chance. Timing never really was our strong suit was it? We were too busy keeping 100 kids alive. I wouldn’t trade it for the world though. Not a second of it.” He lifts the empty cup towards the planet thats now her grave. “I still love ya, Princess.”

He knows Raven’s behind him even before she comes to stand next to him. She’s always there for this. “It’s never gonna get easier is it?”

She shakes her head. “No. I still miss Finn every day. But you learn to deal with it. You never get over losing the one you love, their memory just becomes a part of who you are.”

He nods along. He asks her the same question every year. Every year, expecting to get a different answer. Maybe this time she’ll tell him ‘Yeah. The pain fades. One day you can breathe again. One day you’ll be able to look down at the earth below you and not feel that part of you that’s missing. But she never does.

“She’d be so proud of you Bellamy. You know that, right?”

“Yeah, I just-” The static of the radio on his hip interrupts his thoughts. “Shit I thought I turned that off.” He fumbles for it, hands made clumsy by the drinks he’s downed. He barely has it out of the holster when he stops himself. Was that? No… It couldn’t be… It was just the alcohol in his system. But then…

“Where - you?"A voice. A voice even after 6 years, after 100 years he would never let himself forget. Her voice.

"Oh my god…” Raven whispers from behind him. “It can’t…”

The radio depends back into static once more before going silent and Bellamy raises his own shocked eyes to meet Ravens. “Clarke?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They don’t believe him. “You were just drunk Bellamy.” “It’s been six years Bellamy.” They think he’s holding on to a ghost, but he knows what he heard.

“We can’t risk it because you thought you heard a dead girl on the radio.” That’s Murphy.

“It could have been an old transmission… we can’t just go down without knowing anything-”

“I left her once. I am not doing it again. If there is even the slightest chance that she is alive down there, WE ARE GOING BACK FOR HER.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three weeks after the night by the window they make contact. He’s helping Monty check on the algae when he hears Raven screaming his name through the halls.

“I found it.” That’s all it takes for him to follow her to the control room, to the radio, to Clarke.

“This is the station it came through. But we don’t know for sure-”

“Have you tried to make contact yet?”

“No, we were waiting for you.”

“Ok…” He sighs and grabs the radio. This is it. He’s either about to finally find that missing piece of himself or lose it all over again. “This is Ark Ring to… the ground. Is anyone there? Clarke are you there?”

There’s nothing. It feels like hours floating through freezing water waiting to hear something, anything.

Nothing.

“I’m sorry Bell.” Monty puts a hand on his shoulder.

She’s gone. He pushes himself away from the table ready to yell, or cry, or hit something. 

“-ello?”

“Holy shit.”

Bellamy could tell you he’s never moved that fast in his life, almost falling over himself to get to the radio. “Clarke?”

“Bell-my?” His legs give out, but Murphy leans in to ease his fall.

“Yeah. Yeah Clarke it’s me. Oh my- It’s you? It’s really you? How?”

“Yeah Bell, it’s me.” He can hear the tears in her voice, the same as his own. 

“I’m coming back for you. I’m coming back. I promise. I’m not leaving you again.”

“I miss you.” Its all she can say.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day they land on Earth the second time, isn’t anything like the first. It’s raining for one.

Two, he knows what’s waiting for him when he opens the door. 

And she is. 

Standing at the tree line, looking as beautiful as the day he lost her, is Clarke. Her hair is shorter. And there’s one or two more wrinkles around her eyes when she smiles, but god is she beautiful. Its like they’re not frozen for a moment, both of them standing in shock and amazement that they finally get this. 

Then, it’s like time is moving in fast forward and he’s on his feet and hers are carrying her towards him and they crash together like suddenly all their forgotten broken pieces are fitting back together. He holds her so close he thinks he can feel her heartbeat in his chest and she tangles her small hands through his hair and they’re both crying. But for the first time in 6 years, they aren’t tears for grieving. He’s sobbing apologies against her hair and she’s whispering forgiveness against his shoulder and it’s almost like they didn’t lose those 6 years. Like they were kids again, stranded on a dying planet, leaning on each other for survival.

He pulls back first to look at her. He wants to take in every single inch of her face and memorize it because he never wants to have to forget that face again. 

“I never gave up.” She laughs. “Not on you.”

He stroked her cheek, through the rain and the tears. “I thought I lost you. For 6 years.”

“You didn’t.” She pulls him close against, resting her forehead against his, and they laugh. 

He spent the past 6 years wishing he hadn’t lost her, dreaming that she could come back to him, praying that he could just hold her one more time. And now he get’s all of it. Because she’s alive and in his arms and laughing with him in the rain and he’s never going to lose her again.

TAH DAH! I hope it wasn’t awful! I’m gonna tag a few mutuals so they can share my pain. Love you guys!

@sassamyblake @bellsgirl @octanakin @ravenbellclarke @starboybellamy @scottmcblake @bobmorlee @stargirlclarke

theres a lot that i dont say, because i know it would just come off as me being dramatic to other people. but bc i dont talk about it, i end up crying when im alone for long periods of time. and i feel like im outside of myself until i talk to another person, then i just kind of slowly readjust.

I KNOW.

I KNOW. I’VE BEEN GONE A YEAR. I KNOW. 

I’M AWFUL. I’M THE WORST. I’M SORRY. 

my life has changed so much, everything is so different, everything is so great. i miss all of you though. this summer i’m going to come back with a vengeance, i promise you. school was insane and intense but wonderful and now i’ll have time to come back here, to make music, to cry about mads, to do all the things i used to do. 

i love you all. i’ll be back real soon. say hi and tell me how this year has treated you. sending love love love. xxxxxxx 

bagelthebeaglepup  asked:

Let me just get emotional here for a second and say that you help me so much without even knowing it. You help me forget about stress and confusion while I watch your videos, and you distract me from bad days at school. I come home looking forward to seeing your new vlog/let's play, and I honestly couldn't thank you enough. I'm literally sitting and crying while typing this because I'm so confused, but I have your videos to calm me. Thank you, I wish I could somehow repay the favour 💛

So sorry to hear you’ve been dealing with so much stress, but I’m glad my content can help in some way. Thanks so much for being a part of the community and for supporting what I do! That’s plenty of repayment right there 💛

Okay, the one short little long thing I’m going to say about shinee and their 9th anniversary.

When I found shinee gosh.. 4 years ago now ;; I was lost as a person. I had no direction in my life and no purpose. I almost lost my life, I almost didn’t finish my freshman year in college. I felt lost and alone almost every day. I had lost my support structure and never smiled because I simply didn’t have a reason to anymore. I had lost the happiness in my life.

But then..

Netflix suggested that I watch to the beautiful you, and I did, and I fell in love with the main character, and suddenly a girl, who I actually didn’t like at the time (which is another story for another day), introduced me to shinee and who they are and told me her favourite was Onew and I thought “Onew” was a band… I had so much to learn -_-. But anyway, she is my best friend today (@dubuluvr).

After the end of that semester (I made it!!) I had a drive and a passion again to be happy, to be the best that I could be. This month, I graduated college. I made it to the end and raised my GPA in the process. I have already started the process of finding a job, and feel like I will be heading out to Korea come this August.

I have so much to be grateful for and honestly, I don’t think I could have done it all without shinee. I know they won’t see this, but I hope they know that they are helping people around the world, and as their light shines we shine with it.

Thank you shinee

GUYZ

*leans into mic* ARE WE STILL BREATHING?!

What a finale!! Dare I say, the best episode to date? I’ll be crying for at least a week in a corner but on the bright side, I broke 500 followers today of all days! Thank you sooooooo much!! I’ve met so many nice bloggers and can’t wait to meet more of the Bellarke fam. This started as just a fun side project for my fangirling but I will be cranking out some original content very soon (as the dreaded hiatus sinks in).

Come scream with me about tonight if you’d like and stay tuned for stuff. (Consider this post my BFSN? I was too lazy for a pic).

Love, Jess. ❤️

Third Heartbreak

I did my very best to move on after knowing that my three-year unrequited love will come to an end because the person that I loved one-sidedly is getting married without even knowing about my existence.

Weeks after my first death, my heart got crushed again to ashes when a sad news came in to my inbox – my best friend’s eight year long relationship with my future brother in law was ruined by a third-party betrayal.  I can’t even cry right away. I can’t believe any of this is real. I hoped I can put a halt to the pain that’s smothering me.

Days after that – I was about to attend my close friend’s wedding; she’s more of a sister to me. So even if I will go to a place alone for the first time, I muster my courage and did all my preparation for the occasion.

The venue was located in a remote area. I had a longer journey than expected; I walked a very far distance for the first time in my life again since I am not familiar with the place. I kept in mind that she is worth it.

I even caught a glimpse of the newly wed hugging each other while their photos are being taken. Her smile when she saw me was everything to me. My entire presence served as a humble gift to her special day.

I am not highly confident meeting an acquaintance among the crowd since it was a very private marriage. The people invited are short listed to her relatives and close friends alone. I was just so glad that I was welcomed by her high school classmates and allowed me to sit with them.  The two bride’s maids were so entertaining and left me every once in a while at the table with six empty chairs.

It didn’t take long when the other four came.  He caught my eyes as soon as his figure emerged from the tall shrubs serving as garden ornaments. He still has that slick charismatic look. He looked at me without being surprised as I sit there unable to move because of his sharp smile.

After 8 long years, our paths crossed again. He talked to me casually while the other people with us ignored our unusual fondness. He began catching up with the last story that we talked about the last time we were together. I can’t believe he remembered. He even asked where I am living and can’t believe that it will be convenient for us to go home together since – our routes are almost the same.

During the slow dance, he leaned over me to whisper closely to my ear saying, “You see, I am about to cry.” I did not look at him and just gave him a soft pat on his back as I said “Hold it together.”

He was her best friend. I think I understand how he feels. He must be overwhelmed with happiness that finally his gal found her true love. I strongly feel that I will be like him if my best friends will ever get married.

The wedding ended with a lot of snapped photos and best wishes. The bride’s parents offered us a free ride to leave the vicinity since it’s a private place. The only thing that we need to do is patiently wait at the side of the road while they get their stuff from the hotel.

I was taller than him the last time I saw him, now it was a clear opposite. His slim body still resembles the anime that I watch on television. His physic was a clear advantage since it makes clothes fit him with glamour and class. His silhouette spelled perfection every time the lights of the vehicles that passed by radiates on him. It was the time when he sat on the gutter when I realized that I haven’t spoken anything ever since his other friends left us. All I did was admire him from a far distance as I stood behind him, watching his broad back.

“Can I sit beside you?” – I asked as I held the hemline of my dress.

He didn’t answer. He got his phone and turned on the flash to direct on the ground where I am about to sit. He is still that gentleman that I used to know. I was moved.

As we sit together, we talked about career, plans in the future and a lot of things.  I am fascinated about the fact on how we can completely relate to each other during our conversation.  We, under that dim lit side of the road, humming with silence from time to time because our own loss of words under the moonlight – entertained by the twinkling carpet of radiance from a distant city right within our view.

The game changed when our ride came. We rode the crowded vehicle with all the family’s luggage as our sit mates not to think that there will still be three more people to join us.  He looks tired and sleepy. He kept on telling me about that while we were still outside. I can see the sigh of comfort as we sat comfortably on our designated spots.

We abruptly stopped to pick up the remaining people. He even bothered to go down and make way for the ladies to get in first. It was a complicated puzzle with all the bags piled up on every direction. He suggested for me to go down too so one of them could get in. Our positions can’t be compromised since both of us will be the ones who will be dropped first.

I got off balanced – but I managed to maintain my gravity. I saw his hand reached to mine but my reflexes immediately rejected his flesh. I held on the metal door instead. It was such a waste inside my head. I should have accepted his offer of help; I could have touched that warm soft palm of his compared to this cold and lifeless thing.

It was dark inside the van. I can’t help myself from stealing quick glances towards his direction. I caught him smiling as he supported his head with his hand. He was relatively closing his eyes – trying to pretend that he wasn’t tired. He was still keeping the atmosphere alive. He’s still charming even beneath the shadows; he was shining to me like a sparkling light.

We finally reached our destination and bid our friends goodbye. From this place – our three hour journey together will start. We stopped by a near fast food chain to quickly go to comfort rooms. He even asked me if I would want to go grab something to eat.  He was not at his best condition but he still has the time to think of me.  I went out empty handed – still he suggested for me to grab even just a drink. He was so persistent. I wanted us to go and just take the bus right away because I wanted him to rest as soon as possible but he won’t bend until I get myself something.

We went to a drugstore and I bought a bottle of water. I looked around and he wasn’t behind me. I walked towards the cashier and there he was by the door, patiently waiting without any trace of irritation or hurry.  He was just standing there giving me all the leisure time that I can have.

The bus finally greeted us with a convenient choice of route. As expected from him, he let me get in first. When I am sleepy, I always prefer to seat near the window so I can comfortably rest the side of my body as I take a nap. I offered him that seat, thinking of his convenience but he refused.

“No, you sit there.” He said firmly.

“But you’re tired and you need to sleep” I objected.

“Regardless, you’re still a lady.” He reasoned out and my heart skipped a beat.

We sat right next to each other and as the bus started moving – he suddenly asked me.

“What did you feel when she told you that she’s getting married?” A sound of curiosity was obvious in his words

“I felt a bit shocked? Maybe because I didn’t see it coming this soon or I never imagined that they will get married this way. How about you?” I answered him honestly.

“I – seen zoned her. I cannot face the fact that she’s getting married.” He paused in the middle of his narration and took a deep breath before continuing.

“I cried the entire day feeling betrayed. I replied to her the next day telling her that –I WAS NOT OKAY. It’s because we had a promise to each other that at the age of 35 and we still weren’t able to find partners –we will marry each other.  Now that she got married, I felt like I was left all alone because I honestly waited for her.” He closed his eyes as he reminisced that moment.

“It’s not that I don’t want her to get married to another man but maybe not this way. I wanted her to be more equipped, prepared like with a house and a car. I wanted the best for her. I really sound so selfish right now. I even apologized to her that I might sound like I wasn’t happy that she had a gift of life given to her. I was happy that she’s having a baby but maybe I was just so sad that I am not the one who’s going to be with her.” He smiled desperately.

I wanted to give him a hug, a very tight and warm long hug but my body won’t move. My bruised heart wanted to explode all over again. I remembered he told me he was about to cry  earlier while we were at the reception. I regret not taking him seriously. I feel sorry for him.

I told him that hearing this part of the story gave me my 3rd heartbreak for this year. This somehow made him laugh. He then instantly changed our conversation. We started drawing out plans going on road trips, eating outside to catch up and even listening to music when we are both free.

We stopped when I was able to convince him to go to sleep first since we still have a long way to go. He asked me if I wasn’t sleepy. I was taken aback once more. I asked him why. He looked at me like he will not sleep if I am going to sleep, he even reminded me that I walked a long distance to reach the venue and was worried that I was tired. I cannot believe what I am hearing from him, this intensity of concern is unbelievable. I told him right away that I am used to long trips and he can take the coupon for sleeping.

The moment he closed his eyes, he dozed off instantly. He wasn’t just tired, he endured going to an event which broke his heart, his dreams – his hopes. I watched him steadily like a baby by my side, what a poor soul.

He woke up just before we can even reach our destination half way. He felt that it was too cold, he even looked at my pull over stretched out to its end and stood up to adjust the air-condition of the bus. I wanted to do that all throughout our travel but I was afraid I might wake him up. When he sat down again I heard him say – “You should have told me that it’s cold.” and I responded with a weak smile.

Our goal never changed in my mind, it was still fixed inside my head that right after we go down, we will split to go on our way home. I know he is still dead tired with two hours of sleep prior to this day. The bus randomly stopped by on the corner of the street to load more passengers and as we stare outside – he asked me “Aren’t you hungry? Do you want to go down and grab a quick dinner?” again I was speechless. Here he goes again, thinking of my welfare before his.

I refused of course but he insisted remembering I just had water when we left. I smiled and told him – it’s okay. I needed to assure him three times that I will be okay before he gave up.

We got off the bus right after a few minutes. The end of our trip together came close as we walked side by side going to the cab stand – I had an impulse to grab his hand. I wanted to give him a proper goodbye. I wanted to tell him I was grateful to see him again. I failed to do that – it was improper and it was awkward.

He got the chance to hail a vehicle sooner than me. He waved his hand to the driver and quickly turned around to my direction. I was surprised when he gave me a quick hug and rubbed his cheek to mine. I stood there frozen as I he shouted to me “SEE YOU SOON!”

Fin.

kjngslayer  asked:

daryl dixon

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life
hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang
hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff
best quality: his loyalty
worst quality: sometimes too damn stubborn 
ship them with: always carol. lowkey always rick too.
brotp them with: rick, aaron, eric
needs to stay away from: anything saviors related. pls.
misc. thoughts: i will forever love his character no matter what. he has come such a long way and how he actually ended up with a new family after the world went to shit makes me cry so hard every time i think about it. my only hope is that they let him speak normal sentences again..like…my boy is smart, please show us that again.

send me a character

Fanfic Writer "Problems"

-new music = new songifc

-new movie = new AU

-heard or witnessed something cute? Write a fic about it.

-“hmmm. Imagine [insert character here] doing this.”

-[driving and minding your own business] OH MY GOD! ANOTHER COFFEESHOP AU!

-“oh. This guy almost crashed into me. Imagine my fave character almost doing that to me.”

-“what are these words? What’s writing? I don’t know her.”

-“Damn. I’m so poetic. I should write a book.”

-“I’m so romantic. Why isn’t anyone in love with me?”

-“Wow. This is so angsty. I hate myself…I cant wait for my readers ti come to me saying I made them cry.”

-“I bullshitted this. It’s not edited. But pls enjoy it anyway. Thx.”

-“Okay but imagine this…A LOVE TRIANGLE!”

-“CLIFFHANGEEEERRRR!!!”

-“Bed sharing tropes! Friends to lovers tropes! I hate you to I love you tropes! ALL THE TROPES!”

anonymous asked:

1 hey em...:/ An pld man came to my work today, I saw him a few times before, but after he paid for his plant, he started to ask me my phone number and he didn't stop even if I said no. Then he said that he would give me his phone number, he started asking where I lived and for my email adress. And I was so scared I didn't know what to say. When he finally walked to the door (after saying he would call here for me) he said: my new plant will look really good in my bedroom.. I'll think about it.

Anonymous said: 2 And then he went away and I was crying a little bit because I was scared and I talked to my boss and we have his phone number and his name id he come back but now I just feel like shit, I want to cry and I am not productive anymore at work. I really want to cry and go to sleep. I know it’s not like if he had raped me but I was really dcared, I am 18 and he was like 70. I am scared he qill come back here, he was so insistent:( I feel just… like he broke my “bubble”, my personal space. :/

No. 

Don’t you DARE feel guilty over this, my lovely. You’re not to blame for his horrendous actions and behaviour. What he did to you, to make you so uncomfortable, was so wrong and freaky and incredibly creepy and he needs a reality check because that’s NOT how you make members of staff feel. You’re not at fault. If he comes back or tries to , you let someone know. Don’t ever feel like you need to fear your safety, at your job, around men like that. Report him to your manager. Get him noticed because then actions, by the law, will be taken. xx

okay, but you know what i would love to read? aftg from kevin’s pov.

like, it starts right after riko breaks his hand - it shows him running to wymack because wymack is his father but shows us his fears: of riko, of what riko could do to wymack, of the backlash that could fall on the foxes because of it

i want to know what was going through kevin’s mind when he gave his back to andrew and what their friendship was like pre-neil. i want to know more of kevin’s backstory - about the scars in places no one can see, about the bruises, the broken bones that he had to fight through because riko would not allow him to tarnish their appearances. give me 400 pages detailing kevin’s fears and hopes and dreams, instead of turning him into an exy/alcohol robot.

i want to read about exy being the thing that makes kevin feel close to his mother, about kevin pushing himself to be better for her, i want to read about the pain of losing his mom and how it’s something he still struggles with daily, about him wondering what his life would be like if she had lived.

i want to read about his friendship with jean, how it got to the broken state it is, what riko did to ruin it (and them)

i just want more of kevin, because he is not emotionless, he is not just an exy player. he is a human being who has lived a childhood full of trauma and abuse, while simultaneously being forced to smile and act like nothing is wrong when there are a million eyes on him at all times.

How to Get a Little to Stop Procrastinating:
  • Me: I miss you Daddy.
  • Daddy: I miss you too, are you doing your paper?
  • Me: Kinda...
  • Daddy: hmm?
  • Me: I just wanna color :(
  • Daddy: Color later
  • Me: But... but... Daddy...
  • Daddy: Paper
  • Me: Uggggggggggggggggggggggggg
  • Daddy: Come on now Kitten
  • Me: I so literally just want to not do it.
  • Daddy: No
  • Me: I'm doing it. Just lots of breaks to cry about how much I hate this
  • Daddy: awwww. I'll reward you if you finish it.
  • Me: Oooo what kind of reward?
  • Daddy: New stuffie
  • Me: ... Daddy.... are we being serious here....
  • Daddy: One big enough to cover your bed... maybe
  • Me: Daddy....
  • Daddy: Hm?
  • Me: Don't mess with me here. This is serious business you're talking about
  • Daddy: Maybe not that big. But a stuffie.
  • Me: Well now I have to finish this paper even if it kills me.