Abuse by parents is so insidious, especially emotional abuse. Because parents can be fine and supportive and loving until something doesn’t go their way and then it’s guilt and appeals to authority that border on gaslighting.
Because I don’t know what else to call it when a parent says the way they remember it is the TRUTH, negating a child’s experience and memory and then saying that they are right because they are the parent.
Their version of what happened is the official story and a child gets manipulated into believing it or agreeing with it.
And sometimes these relationships don’t necessarily change when the child becomes an adult, sometimes that child standing up for themselves and holding their ground becomes evidence that they don’t “care” and that they are “unfeeling” or “unappreciative” of what the parent has given them.
And sure, maybe overall they are top tier parents worthy of awards, but so many can’t face that at best they have been using abusive tactics to emotionally manipulate their children.
Seeing people defend R Kelly is so disgusting, especially when they use the “I’m not going to shun him because black men face police brutality” when:
1. Victims of police brutality are innocent, whereas R Kelly is the predator
2. R Kelly is a known abuser who preys on young girls (he was caught outside of middle schools trying to seduce young girls and married Aaliyah when she was 15)
3. R Kelly is forcing those women into cutting off all contact with their family and threatens to to financially ruin these women if they leave
4. Multiple women who were in his inner circle or were his victims over the years confirmed the allegations and gave more details about his abuse
Excusing an abuser’s behavior because he’s black and other black men are victims of police brutality is not only demeaning to the innocent people who experienced systematic oppression, but also putting the feelings of a predator over the wellbeing of these innocent young black women who are being brainwashed and abused physically, emotionally, and sexually.
Anytime that I learn that R. Kelly is releasing new music, or that he’ll be appearing at an awards show or that he’s received some other affirmation or distinction in spite of his despicable history, I’m reminded that those who harm black women and girls too often escape accountability, and that our word is rarely enough.
How else to explain Monday’s devastating report at BuzzFeed detailing new allegations of predatory and abusive behavior towards young women by Kelly?
It shouldn’t have come as a surprise to many people, but even just judging by the parents of the women whose cases are featured in the story, the implications of years of reports of Kelly’s behavior escaped many people, if they’d heard about it at all .
After all, unless you are an avid consumer of African-American media or the Chicago Sun-Times, it’s perhaps possible that you’ve missed hearing very much about the decades of rumors, allegations, lawsuits, settlements and criminal charges that define, for some of us, the self-proclaimed “Pied Piper of R&B” far more than any of his famous songs ever could.
Kelly’s alleged abuse of underage girls and women has been covered by the likes of the Village Voice,GQ and New York; his behaviors aren’t some deeply hidden industry secret that managed to evade public speculation for years. Read more(Opinion)
LETTER FROM EYRICKA KING, RECEIVED 11 JULY 2017 ====================================
HELLO HOW ARE YOU? FINE I HOPE AS FOR ME NOT DOING WELL AT ALL. THEY ARE TRYING TO KILL ME! SERIOUSLY I GOT BACK TO FRANKLIN ON FRIDAY JUNE 30ᵀᴴ AND I’VE BEEN IN THE BOX SINCE I WAS ATTACKED BY SOME SARGENTS UPON MY ARRIVAL BACK HERE AND THROWN IN THE BOX TO SILENCE ME. HERE IS WHAT HAPPENED WHEN I GOT BACK TO FRANKLIN THE PUT ME IN A DORM WITH THE SAME GUY (INMATE) WHO TRIED HAVING SEX WITH ME AND WHEN I REFUSED TO HAVE SEX HE SPIT ON ME, YOU REMEMBER WHEN THAT INCIDENT HAPPENED BACK IN APRIL, AND THE PREA DEPUTY MS. SOUTHERS HAD ME MOVED TO A BETTER DORM. OK UPON MY ARRIVAL TO THE DORM THE INMATE CAME TO THE DOOR WITH 3 OTHER INMATES AND THREATENED
TO ATTACK ME IF I CAME INTO THE HOUSE. SO I IMMEDIATLY TOLD THE OFFICER THAT I COULD NOT LIVE IN THAT DORM AND FOR HIM TO CALL A SARGENT, HE DID JUST THAT. THE SARGENT ARRIVED IN A BLACK VAN WITH 2 OTHER SARGENTS AND HE IMMEDIATLY SAID IT 9:00 AT NIGHT I DON’T FEEL LIKE DEALING WITH THIS PUSSY FAGGOT CUFF HIM NOW THE OTHER SARGENTS THEN BEGAN RUFFING ME UP THEY SLAMMED ME FACE FIRST ON A BRICK WALL LUCKILY NOTHING SEVERE HAPPENED TO MY FACE BUT I WAS SLAMMED SO HARD ONTO THE WALL MY RIGHT BREAST INPLANT SWELLED UP EXTRA BIG AND IS BRUISED THEY BEGAN PUNCHING ME AND SAYING YOU ARE A MAN WHAT IS A FUCKING TRANSGENDER
I WAS CRYING AND BEGGING FOR THEM TO STOP BEATING ME ONE SARGENT SAID AINT THAT WHAT YOU LIKE YOU LIKE MEN TO MAN HANDLE YOU. THEY THEN THREW ME IN THE BACK OF THE VAN BEAT UP AND STILL CUFFED AND DROVE ME TO THE BOX AND STRIPPED ME NAKED AND THREW ME IN A CELL IVE BEEN IN THE SAME CELL SINCE, THEY ARE DENYING ME MEDICAL TREATMENT IVE BEEN ▦ IN SO MUCH PAIN AND SO OUT OF IT I HAVENT EATEN SINCE FRIDAY MORNING JUNE 30ᵀᴴ. ——– IM SO SCARED I THINK THEY ARE GOING TO REALLY HURT ME AND TRY TO SAY IT WAS A SUICIDE. PLEASE CONTACT EVERYBODY THE NEWS STATIONS CALL THE FACILITY ASK TO SPEAK WITH MS. SAUTHERS AND DEPUTY RONALD FOSTER HAVE ——– AND
——– HELP, CONTACT ——– ALSO I NEED OUT OF THE BOX BEFORE IT’S TO LATE I SWEAR ——– I THINK I MIGHT DIE IN HERE PLEASE HELP ME
I WROTE YOU 3 DIFFERENT TIMES SINCE THIS HAPPENED ONLY TO GET THE MAIL RETURNED TO ME SHREDDED UP IN PIECES, THANKS TO ONE GOOD OFFICER THAT CAME TO THE CELL TODAY AND TOLD ME HE SEE’S EVERYTHING THEY DOING TO ME AND THAT HE GOING TO MAKE SURE THIS LETTER GETES MAILED OUT. AGAIN ——– HELP ME DO EVERY AND ANYTHING YOU GUYS CAN TO GET ME OUT OF HERE. F2L IS MY ONLY HOPE.
THEY ONLY CARE ONCE YOU HAVE PEOPLE FROM THE OUTSIDE CALL IN. HAVE ——– CONTACT THE COMMISSIONER GUY THAT SHE BEEN SPEAKING WITH. ——– I DONT WANNA BE IN THE BOX I DID NOTHING WRONG HELP ME.
P.S. I PRAY THIS LETTER REACHES YOU.
==================================== Assist by calling these numbers:
Jason Effman…Head PREA person in Albany…518-457-3955 Franklin Correctional Facility: 518 483 6040. (You can ask to talk to Deputy Deb Southers or a sergeant). Office of Special Investigations Department of Corrections and Community Supervision (PREA office)…(518)-457-2653 Office of the Inspector General…(518) 474-1010
and demanding that Eyricka be transferred out of Franklin to a facility closer to NYC with protective custody that is *not* solitary confinement. Eyricka’s DIN# is 16A4486. If you call, reply to this post or reblog with a summary so that we can know what kind of impact we are having.
“Maybe this case will teach the community not to turn a blind eye to abused children,” said defence lawyer, Amanda Hopkins, at the trial of John Caudle. When John was just 14-years-old, he shot and killed his mother, Joanna Galla Rinebarger and his stepfather, Tracy Rinebarger. What would drive a teenager to kill those who should be closest to him? Abuse. John had suffered years of abuse and neglect; ultimately and unsurprisingly, one day he snapped.
It was the 26th of October, 2009, when John and Joanna got into an altercation. The altercation was specifically because John forgot to bring his mother a soda when she asked. As she stood and yelled in his face, he knew then and there what he needed to do to finally end the years of torment. “I went to my room and for one of the guns. I came out and started shooting at her,” he said. After she was dead, he noticed Tracy’s truck pull up in the driveway. Fearing the trouble he would be in, he hid in the laundry room. Tracy entered the house and saw the lifeless body of his wife. As he rushed over to her side, John emerged from the laundry room and shot him dead.
John was apprehend the following day and the years of neglect and abuse he had suffered quickly surfaced. John, who still sucked his thumb, was often withheld food from his mother while his stepfather often taunted him by calling him a “faggot.” In fact, when he was apprehend he weighed a mere 97 pounds. An avid reader, books were a way for John to escape his reality. However, his books were always confiscated as a punishment. Joanne’s own parents corroborated these claims, adding that she “isolated him from other children,“ and would continually berate and mock him.
John was charged as an adult and sentenced to 16 to 22 years in the Colorado Department of Corrections. John fell through the cracks of the child welfare system and was thrown into the general population of adult prison. In his first and only public statement during his sentencing phase, he said: “At the time, I felt I had nowhere else to turn. I know what I did was wrong, and I am truly sorry.”
just because your anger at something is justified doesn’t mean that lashing out at people with that anger is also justified.
example: a person says something horrible to you and you get mad about it. this anger is valid, it’s reasonable, it’s justified. you go home mad and take your anger out on your roommate by screaming at them, slamming things around, punching walls, whatever else. these actions are not justified.
your feelings about a certain situation or person can be 100% totally reasonable and valid but that doesn’t mean that going on to use those feelings as a weapon against someone who is innocent in all of it is okay.