thecrowing33

thecrowing33 asked:

When can we expect EP7 analysis to be up? Don't mean to be pushy, I just always look forward to your thought out interpretation of Hannibal. Lol.

i’m… not on a schedule [?]

like those posts are literally me screencapping frames i find interesting and scribbling out disordered thoughts about the episode and shuffling it into some sort of sensible structure. [i’m so grateful to all the people who point out all the glaring errors & misquotes b/c i don’t really check/proofread; you are saints.] i’m not even organised enough to sort them into themes, characters &c. 

i haven’t written meta on “yakimono” b/c things irl have been hectic and messy and i just, dunno, didn’t feel compelled or inspired to write about it. tbh i’m still working out my thoughts on the episode. 

but i’ve answered a lot of messages, questions, thoughts &c. about it privately and i’ll continue to do that. i’m really glad you’ve enjoyed the analysis so far.

We are two very different people.

It’s a funny thing when you fall in love with someone who is your complete opposite.

You don’t realize how different you two are because you fit so well together.

I don’t really think about how different Anthony and I are. At least, not until now.

Anthony is in a band. A guitarist. He loves to perform and be on the stage. He’s the kind of guy that could walk into a room full of familiar faces, and they would all get up to talk to him. He stands out. He loves the energy and attention and music and crowd.

I’m an artist. I draw, paint, and many other things. I love to create things with just a pen and a piece of paper. I can sit alone in my room for days at a time, just listening to music and drawing. I’m not a very charismatic or social person, so if I walk into a room full of people, I’m more likely to keep to myself. I love my privacy, my art and my inspirations.

Anthony is also more jagged. He’s very blunt and straight forward. He expresses his opinion, and doesn’t care what others think. He does what he wants, when he wants, and lives his life taking chances. Life is never boring with him. Lol. He is very vibrant and ecstatic and magnetic. People are drawn to him because of his bold impression.

I’m more fluid. I follow others and keep my thoughts to myself. Very passive aggressive. Lol. I’m very calm natured and patient. I enjoy little things in life(although I am pretty crazy for concerts and thrill rides). I tend to be very optimistic and generous towards people I love. I am gentle and quirky and kind hearted. People are drawn to me because of god knows why. I don’t know. I think I’m really weird. Lol.

Basically, we balance each other out. He motivates me to be more bold and outspoken. I try to help him be more caring and gentle. He is everything I could never be. Just like I’m everything he isn’t. And I never really think about that because we fit each other so well. He makes up for everything I lack and vice versa.

We love the same things, but are two totally different people. Two different colors. Different songs.

It’s good to date someone like yourself, but your perfect math will most likely be your opposite.

You want someone who can complete you, not replicate you.

How It Began.

Anthony and I didn’t instantly fall in love. We didn’t meet each other and realize that we were going to be with one another. Our story is a little more interesting.

The first time I met Anthony, I already had a boyfriend. They ended up being friends, and I ended up kind of liking Anthony. But because I was already in a relationship, I didn’t want the feelings to grow, so I started to be mean to him. Like little kids who hit the person they like. Immature? Yes. Effective? Very.

It went on like this for a few months. He tried teasing me by saying he loved my boyfriend more than I did; I would respond with some sort of sarcasm. For the longest time, I didn’t think much of it. He was just the annoying Mexican that worked at Whataburger and played guitar like some sort of god.

Then, I remember beginning to see Anthony talk to other girls. He never had any official relationships that I knew of, but I started to get really jealous. I didn’t know why it bothered me so much, at first. I finally just decided that I didn’t want to see him with any other girl because I didn’t think they would be able to make him happy. That seemed rational? But the truth was that I had deep rooted feelings for Anthony that I kept trying to repress.

A few more months passed, and I started to have problems with my boyfriend. During this time, I would talk to Anthony. At first, I felt like I was bothering him with my problems, but he stayed there for me. One specific day, that I will never forget, I was texting Anthony. I was upset because of things that had happened between my boyfriend and I, and I told him, “I’m sorry, I’m just a mess.” And Anthony’s response was, “You’re not a mess. Your God’s masterpiece.”

And that’s what did it. The passed year I had spent trying to focus on my current relationship and ignore my feelings for Anthony was put to waste when he said that. It was then that I realized how much I had felt for him and cared about him.

Needless to say, not long after that, my boyfriend and I went our separate ways. I remember the day I told Anthony I liked him, HE DIDN’T BELIEVE ME. Because I had always been so mean to him, he really began to believe that I hated him! But shortly after my confession, and working to gain our parent’s approval, we became official. But that’s just how we started dating.

In all reality, I fell in love with Anthony before he even knew that I liked him. And I don’t regret it at all. He like’s to say that I’m “obsessed”(lol), but the truth is, I just adore him. He’s perfect for me in everyway. I could tell you so many memories that we’ve had. And, more than likely, I will start writing some of my favorite memories with him, like an actual story. But this is just the chronological order in which Anthony came into my life and completely changed it.:)