At fourteen, I got my first girlfriend. I was femme to her butch. I don’t think I’d ever felt anything as nice as the back of her shaved head. She would lay with her head on my lap, and I would run my finger under the back of her sports bra and up to the nape of her neck. It was calming. She didn’t think of me as a fat girl or as a pair of boobs. She thought of me as me, and that was right.

At sixteen, inspired by my girlfriend and other queer kids around me, I left home for good and shaved my head too. The waist-length hair that I felt was required to be female in my family was gone. Although my teachers were taken aback by my haircut, I started to be listened to. My shaved head became synomynous with a ‘don’t-fuck-with-me’ attitude as well as with being butch. All of a sudden, I was tough shit at my high school, the defender of all things righteous.
—  Sailor Holladay, “38 B,” Persistence: All Ways Butch and Femme (Eds. Ivan E. Coyote & Zena Sharman)

Danny Phantom fanart! …Phan art? I always found Vlad to be a very sympathetic villain, at least up until season 3 when everything kinda went off the rails. The idea of three inseparable friends being torn apart because of unrequited love and jealousy is a pretty deep and dark concept for a kids show. There are so many people like Vlad in real life, they just don’t have super powers.

its fucking bullshit that femmes r the only lesbians yall care abt lol. butches r only considered attractive thru a very sexual lens n god forbid u be a butch who doesnt want to fuck every femme out there!!! god forbid u be a butch who isnt into femmes!!! god forbid u be a butch who doesnt fit into tumblrs ideology of what a butch should be!!! (hint: its a skinny, white, perfectly androgynous soft butch who can still be called pretty n wears makeup)

yall dont care abt butches bc u only care abt lesbians that r sweet n pure n feminine lmao. ur all so ugly 

i dont wanna see a single femme comment on this lol

Compulsory Heteronormativity

Lets talk about compulsory heteronormativity (comp het).

So what is Comp Het?

To put simply comp het is when a lesbian feels as though they could or are attracted to men because that is the societal/personal expectation of them.

Signs of Comp Het

  • only having crushes on famous/unattainable men
  • having to think of specific reasons to justify crushes on men (they’re my best friend its only right, high school sweethearts, it’d be a cute story, etc) but never having to justify crushes on girls in the same way - you just like them.
  • Idealizing about relationships with men but being uncomfortable with real life interactions with men.
  • Your ‘attraction’ to men doesn’t feel as strong or real as your attraction to women.

Comp Het vs Attraction

If you’re wondering if you’re experiencing comp het or if its attraction to men, here are some questions to ask yourself.

  • Can you imagine yourself realistically having a relationship/future with a man? 
  • Does your attraction with men feel natural or forced?
  •  Do you consider relations with men to be just ‘survivable’ or ‘not disgusting’ as opposed to actually pleasing and desirable?
  • Do you only like men you have no chance with (famous, fictional, or otherwise unattainable)?

I hope this helped clear some stuff up for some young (or old) questioning lesbians and if you ever have any questions my ask box is open.

anonymous asked:

Hey I'm feelin a little down about being butch/nb... could we make a master post about all the stuff that's awesome about being a butch/nb lesbian???? (Also autocorrect keeps trying to turn nb into B.n.B so apparently we all own a little bed n' breakfast now... y'all better get over here and help me run it)

lol. Hey, followers, reply w/ what’s awesome about butch & nb lesbians!

-Mod Q