the Discourse

If I say that due to patriarchy, women have a hard time with positive body images, that isn’t a cue for you to say, “but men have it hard too”

If I say that due to systemic and structural racism, black people have it extremely hard in America, that’s not the signal for you to chime in with, “but white people are hurting too”

If I say that because of deeply ingrained heteronormativity, LGBTQ people have it hard, guess what? That is not the signal for someone to announce that straight people also have difficulties in life

I believe that in a genuine desire to be fair, sometimes well meaning people foolishly engage in a, “both sides have it hard” argument

But simply taking a “both sides,” counter-position to a statement of fact fairness

No one is saying that men, white people and cis/het people all have perfect lives. Nobody believes that. But they absolutely have it easier than their counterparts. From employment and housing opportunities, to avoiding deadly encounters with law enforcement, to disproportionately unfair outcomes in the criminal “justice” system

Ignoring facts and being contrary is not the same thing as being fair to both sides: women dO have it harder than men, black people ARE treated less fairly than white people, LGBTQ people dO face more discrimination than their heterosexual counterparts (and woo boy, the people living in the intersection of those identities have it even harder)

Sometimes, one side is in the wrong and the other isn’t. Somebody needs to be brave enough, or have enough common sense to admit it without always worrying about hurting the feelings of the party in the wrong

Look, I’m always going to speak the truth here, as best as I can. If something I’ve said on any of those grounds offends you, or if you feel overcome with the urge to “both sides” one of my posts, then I very strongly advise you to write a post of your very own about why you think otherwise. Don’t ride my coattails to make your false equivalence

I’m not here for any “discourse” that lends credibility to false “both sides” foolishness

Fandom:

Adults: *create a space for other adults*

Minors*: *come into that space* 

Minors: this isn’t a safe space for kids!!

Adults: …..uhh no, it’s not.

Minors: why are you personally attacking me personally?

Adults: ….????????………… 

Minors: I know you want to fuck children

Me: *looks at fic with one character that’s in his 40′s and another that’s in his 50′s, with no children in sight* 

Me: ………please get out of my house

(I still get a lot of responses to this post calling me a pedo and I am t i r e d of this bottom-of-the-barrel quality discourse)

* this obviously doesn’t apply to all minors, and to all those minors (like me, when I was your age!) that manage to enjoy and participate in fandom without calling everyone a pedophile, I appreciate you.

mpreg

since no one seems to be happy with lgbt, mogai, or any other acronym or umbrella term, i came up with a new one that i think is gonna cover all our bases:

mpreg = marginalized people of romantic, erotic and gender

One of my least favorite things that often happens when straight people write LGBT characters is when during a fight or something a gay character makes a mean comment or something about another character being closeted or pretending to be someone they’re not etc, especially if it happens in front of other people because… most LGBT people know not to out people or make them feel like shit for not being out, because we understand how painful being closeted can be, but straight people love to use it for drama and it’s honestly annoying to read at this point

My view on the “waiting for the McElroy culture to go sour thing” is that,,, if it’s not broke, don’t fix it? I feel like this is where the rift is going to split open, pitting “things inevitably go bad” against “I really just enjoy them, please let it alone” people

We’re making problems where there really aren’t any? I see people citing the fact we refer to them as “good sweet boys” which is literally just mimicking the way the guys talk, themselves. Ofc we’re not infantilizing them, we’re just enjoying their comforting humor, pls don’t make problems where there aren’t any

Still hilarious to me (and frustrating as hell) that fandom wank 10-15 years ago was “oh, that character is too perfect. Special snowflake. Mary Sue. Give them some flaws to make them more realistic.”

and now it’s “that character isn’t pure enough. They have all these flaws. You must be a bad person if you like them.”

what the ever-living fuck, fandom

why can’t we have nice things?

so I’ve seen some posts going around saying horrible things about Detroit: Become Human and I have to ask myself, why does this always happen? Undertale, Steven Universe, Markiplier, Thomas Sanders…it’s like an endless cycle. Once a thing gets popular enough there’s all these jerks that swarm it picking at it for horrible scraps to say that it’s wrong and you’re horrible for enjoying it

Anyway, I’m here to counter-point and rant a little, so let’s get started

To the people saying shit about Connor and the other characters’ designs. Those aren’t designs, those are actual people’s faces

Bryan Dechart and Jesse Williams are real people who physically acted out the scenes with motion capture. So, you’re not insulting some game designer with a tablet, you’re insulting actual live people and that’s not okay

And if you’re shitting on people for finding them attractive, seriously why even? People are allowed to be physically and/or sexually attracted to whoever they damn well please. You can’t police that and expect people to think you’re clever. Let people enjoy their cute faces, it wont kill you, damn

To the people pissed about how it’s ‘racist’ because it’s taking real world concepts (hate speech, segregation, etc.) and making them fictional with non-humans. Fiction has been doing this for years. It’s very common to use fictional stories to show real world bigotry in a different light. Harry Potter and Zootopia are two prime examples that I can think of off the top of my head

It takes real life racism and makes it easier to relate to, more obvious to those who refuse to notice it, and this is not the worst way it’s been used, I assure you. In fact, the game even brings it up with Rose mentioning that Blacks were treated the similarly and how people helped them escape and that’s why she was helping Deviants in the first place

And finally, to the people crying out that David Cage, producer and creator of the game, has been accused of sexual assault and how supporting this game is evil because of it. First of all, some people didn’t know I certainly didn’t and you can’t call them out on something that isn’t their fault to begin with, it’s a dick move and we both know it

Second of all, yeah, the guy is a massive dick and I agree he should go to jail for what he’s done, but he’s not the only one that worked on this game, is he? No. There’s writers, animators, musicians, actors, editors-for fucks sake just read the credits for once in your life

A shit ton of people came together to make this game and they’re proud of their work and they should be. The game looks amazing, the actors did a fantastic job, the characters are well written, the story is fun and easy to understand even if you’ve never done RPGs before

So yeah, David Cage did horrible things, no one is surprised, okay? But those dozens of people who made this game deserve to know they did a good job and made a really good game for people to enjoy. Me buying the game and enjoying it isn’t for fucking David Cage, it’s for them

TLDR: the world isn’t black and white, nothing is inherently good or bad, grow up. Also, People are smart enough to enjoy things and still acknowledge that it isn’t perfect, what a surprise

On Age Differences in Shipping

The biggest argument I’ve seen on here against two consenting adults* in a relationship is that said relationship is unhealthy, and therefore should not have a place in fandom. This has been applied to a lot of different pairings for different reasons - villain characters, mental illness, incest - but I think the one that gets the most attention is age differences.

The logic goes like this: age differences are always unhealthy and are therefore also immoral, and we cannot “normalize” this bad behavior lest the children (think of the children!) think that age differences are okay in real life.

If this is you, I have some news that’s gonna rock your world: age differences ARE okay in real life. People marry people older than themselves every day! Right now there are millions of people all over the world in relationships with 3+ years difference between partners and that’s okay. Your personal values - that everyone should be in a relationship with someone close to their own age - are not everyone’s personal values. And, your personal values are inherently subjective yardsticks with no real inherent meaning other than that which you ascribe to them.

“But age differences are abusive!”

Nope. Nu uh, no way. You can have a relationship with 2 people born on the same goddamn day that’s a dumpster fire and you can have a healthy and loving relationship between people with 10 or 20 years between them. Saying otherwise is the worst kind of conservative republican pearl clutching, and if that statement surprises you then you need to take a step back and look at what you’re advocating.

My sister and her husband are six years apart. My parents, 12. I have a friend whose parents have a 26 year age difference. Do you find that personally gross? Maybe - who cares! It’s not your life, and no one else is telling you that you have to marry someone you find old and gross. But it is every person’s individual right to be with the person that they want to (provided that that person is also a consenting adult), and saying “but I don’t think they should be allowed to be together because I personally find it icky,” is literally the far-right’s justification against the LGBT community.

“But what if one of the people is really young and the other is really old!” 

Is the younger person a legal adult? Yes? Then it’s not your problem! Is it unhealthy? Maybe! Power dynamics can be complicated, but complicated ≠ immoral. Half the fun of fandom is taking two people that don’t automatically fit together and figuring out how to make that work.

Do large age differences have the potential for abuse? Sure! Is that abuse pedophilia? That depends - did you answer “yes” to the question about being a legal adult? Then no! It’s not pedophilia! If neither character is a minor, then it’s not pedophilia! Period! End of story!

I made a post talking about a 40 year old dating a 50 year old, and got this comment:

“it’s creepy to normalize such large age differences, yes, and such relationships can have their roots in pedophilia, but they’re not always such”

Pedophilia has GOT to stop being everyone’s go-to word for “things that I personally dislike” because there is literally no way in which a 40 year old dating a 50 year old can be pedophilia. The power dynamics between someone that’s 20 versus 30 can be complicated. But 40 and 50? The difference in power and shared life experiences are negligible.

Your personal feelings of disgust ≠ objective morality.

If you don’t like it, don’t read it.

*two consenting adults, two consenting adults, two consenting adults - everything written here is about two consenting adults. I better not get people on here saying that I’m advocating for children in relationships with adults, I s2g.

Everyone keeps on saying Disney is taking a big risk with Le Fou being gay and I feel like people don’t understand what a risk is.

First of all, this is Disney you’re talking about. Last year, they had seven major blockbusters that killed it at the box office. Do you really think that a company that is making money in their sleep is in any danger? No really, do you really think Disney is any danger of losing money?

Secondly, taking a risk has to be…well risky. Le Fou being gay isn’t a risk because Le Fou is not a major player within the story of Beauty and the Beast. Hell, I don’t even think Le Fou showed up in Kingdom Hearts despite Beast and Belle playing a huge role in the game. So many people don’t even know who he is. A risk would be making the Beast a woman and having a lesbian romance. Or having Belle be a black woman and Beast be a Chinese man. Those are risks. There is nothing risky about the whole Le Fou thing.

Can people please stop acting like Disney is this tiny ass company that is trying their best? You don’t have to coddle them.