the world of endless everything

WHY

WHY

DOES

SEEMINGLY

NO

ONE

IN

THIS

FANDOM

TALK

ABOUT

GIRIPAN

?!

?!?!?!?!

?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

She deserves everything. She deserves the world. She deserves endless kisses and back tickles. She deserves to have her hand held every second of the day and she deserves to be told she’s beautiful. She deserves much more than I can give her but that doesn’t mean I won’t try. I’ll try so hard to be perfect for her because she’s the only thing I need. She will never feel under appreciated and if she does I will try to make it up to her everyday until she believes that I love her more than anything in this world.
—  I want her forever
58 of the most beautiful sentences from “Paper Towns”

1. “What a treacherous thing it is to believe that a person is more than a person.”

2. “I like this. I like the consistency. I like that I can drive fifteen hours from home without the world changing too much.”

3. “Everyone demented with the mania of owning things. All the things paper-thing and paper-frail. And all the people, too. I’ve lived here for eighteen years and I have never once in my life come across anyone who cares about anything that matters.”

4. “I knew these halls so well — and finally it was starting to feel like they knew me, too.”

5. “Forever is composed of nows.”

6. “Tonight, darling, we are going to right a lot of wrongs. And we are going to wrong some rights. The first shall be the last; the last shall be the first; the meek shall do some earth-inheriting. But before we can radically reshape the world, we need to shop.”

7. “I imagine it is hard to go back once you’ve felt the continents in your palm.”

8. “This was the first time in my life that so many things would never happen again.”

9. “We can hear others, and we can travel to them without moving, and we can imagine them, and we are all connected one to the other by a crazy root system like so many leaves of grass — but the game makes me wonder whether can really ever fully become another.”

10. “It is so hard to leave — until you leave. And then it is the easiest goddamned thing in the world.”

11. “Humans lack good mirrors. It’s so hard for anyone to show us how we look, and so hard for us to show anyone how we feel.”

12. “You keep expecting people not to be themselves.”

13. “I always felt like you had to be important to have enemies.”

14. “New York was the only place in America where a person could actually live a halfway livable life.”

15. “The physical space between us evaporates. We play the broken strings of our instruments one last time.”

16. “I can almost imagine a happiness without her, the ability to let her go, to feel our roots are connected even if I never see that leaf of grass again.”

17. “The day passed as it always did — in slow motion, with a thousand plaintive glances at the clock. But now it was even more unbearable, because every minute I waste din school was another minute in which I failed to find her.”

18. “Nothing is as boring as other people’s dreams.”

19. “Such was life that morning: nothing really mattered that much, not the good things and not the bad ones. We were in the business of mutual amusement, and we were reasonably prosperous.”

20. “And when I say that her hand brushes up against mine, and I just grab hers because it feels like there is less to ruin now.”

21. “Once the vessel cracks open, the end becomes inevitable.”

22. “If it doesn’t happen to you, it doesn’t happen at all.”

23. “There are so many people. It is easy to forget how full the world is of people, full to bursting, and each of them imaginable and consistently misimagined.”

24. “The town was paper, but the memories were not. All the things I’d done here, all the love and pity and compassion and violence and spite, kept welling up inside me.”

25. “Maybe she had sat here in the cacophonous darkness and felt some kind of desperation take her over, and maybe she found it impossible to unthink the thought of death.”

26. “At least I carpe’d that one diem.”

27. “Even though I could see her there, I felt entirely alone among these big and empty buildings, like I’d survived the apocalypse and the world had been given to me, this whole and amazing and endless world, mine for the exploring.”

28. “I’m not saying that everything is survivable. Just that everything except the last thing is.”

29. “I think the future deserves our faith.”

30. “I’ve never seen her eyes dead like that, but then again, maybe I’ve never seen her eyes before.”

31. “I don’t know how I look, but I know how I feel: Young. Goofy. Infinite.”

32. “It’s kind of great, being an idea that everybody likes.”

33. “Maybe the strings break, or maybe our ships sink, or maybe we’re grass — our roots so interdependent that no one is dead as long as someone is still alive. We don’t suffer from a shortage of metaphors, is what I mean. But you have to be careful which metaphor you choose, because it matters.”

34. “Everything’s uglier close up.”

35. “I always liked routine. I suppose I never found boredom very boring. I doubted I could explain it to someone like Margo, but drawing circles through life struck me as a kind of reasonable insanity.”

36. “She either trusted me or wanted me to fall.”

37. “I learn something about fear. I learn that it is not the idle fantasies of someone who maybe wants something important to happen to him, even if the important thing is horrible. It is not the disgust of seeing a dead stranger, and not the breathlessness of hearing a shotgun pumped outside of Becca Arrington’s house. This cannot be addressed by breathing exercises. This fear bears no analogy to any fear I knew before. This is the basest of all possible emotions, the feeling that was with us before we existed, before this building existed, before the earth existed. This is the fear that made fish crawl out onto dry land and evolve lungs, the fear that teaches us to run, the fear that makes us bury our dead.”

38. “At some point, you gotta stop looking up at the sky, or one of these days you’ll look back down and see that you floated away, too.”

39. “And this is what I was trying to do, too. I guess: to listen to all the little sounds of her, because before any of it could make sense, it had be heard.”

40. “Leaving feels good and pure only when you leave something important, something that mattered to you. Pulling life out by the roots. But you can’t do that until your life has grown roots.”

41. “I have nothing to gain from kissing her. But I am no longer looking to gain anything.”

42. “I leave, and the leaving is so exhilarating I know I can never go back. But then what? Do I just keep leaving places, and leaving them, and leaving them, tramping a perpetual journey?”

43. “We bring the fucking rain, Q. Not the scattered showers.”

44. “I think maybe the reason I have spent most of my life being afraid is that I have been trying to prepare myself, to train my body for the real fear when it comes. But I am not prepared.”

45. “Isn’t it also that on some fundamental level we find it difficult to understand that other people are human beings in the same way that we are? We idealize them as gods or dismiss them as animals.”

46. “I decided to clean out my locker, because I didn’t really want to come back here and again have to feel like my lungs were drowning in this perverse nostalgia.”

47. “I wanted to tell her that the pleasure for me wasn’t planning or doing or leaving; the pleasure was in seeing our strings cross and separate and then come back together.”

48. “You can argue…that Ahab is a fool for being obsessed. But you could also argue that there is something tragically heroic about fighting this battle he is doomed to lose.”

49. “Only now, after all this lost time, did I realize how terribly I had misunderstood both her game and the prize for winning it.”

50. “You listen to people so that you can imagine them, and you hear all the terrible and wonderful things people do to themselves and to one another, but in the end the listening exposes you even more than it exposes the people you’re trying to listen to.”

51. “She’d told me: the pleasure isn’t in doing the thing; the pleasure is in planning it.”

52. “Sometimes, the way you think about a person isn’t the way they actually are…People are different when you can smell them and see them up close.”

53. “I didn’t need you, you idiot. I picked you. And then you picked me back…And that’s like a promise. At least for tonight. In sickness and in health. In good times and in bad. For richer, for poorer. Till dawn do us part.”

54. “We are now as I wished we could be then.”

55. “It is saying these things that keeps ups from falling apart. And maybe by imagining these futures we can make them real, and maybe not, but either way we must imagine them. The light rushes out and floods in.”

56. “Doing stuff never feels as good as you hope it will feel.”

57. “I am afforded the chance to think one more thought, and I think about her. I blame her for this ridiculous, fatal chase — for putting us at risk, for making me into the kind of jackass who would stay up all night and drive too fast. I would not be dying were it not for her. I would have stayed home, as I have always stayed home, and I would have been safe, and I would have done the one thing I have always wanted to do, which is grow up.”

58. “And for those two minutes we just stared at each other, and I watched the blue in her eyes. It was nice — in the dark and the quiet, with no possibility of me saying anything to screw it up, and her eyes looking back, like there was something in me worth seeing.”


(from www.buzzfeed.com)

Danse Macabre

Part six of six

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five

Universe: Big Dipper AU

Rating: PG-13

Pairings: None

Characters: Mabel Pines, Dipper Pines, Bill Cipher, Wendy Corduroy, Soos Ramirez, and Stan Pines.

Warnings: Gore, graphic depictions of violence, blood, psychological torture, death, violence towards children, self harm, graphic descriptions of corpses

Genre: Horror/thriller

Summary: Bill Cipher will take what he wants and no one, not even a fifteen year old kid, is going to stand in his way.

It’s shorter than the others but guess what? It’s done!

Keep reading

5.30.17

i realized that in the past, i only write when i’m sad, sure sadness fuels creativity and compels me to think, but hey i’m writing today because i’m happy. 

i haven’t felt sheer joy in a long time. but now i do. it feels like all the burden i carry has just been unloaded. in this moment at least, i’m free of insecurities and any unnecessary worries. I’M INVINCIBLE. I FEEL LIKE I COULD ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING. I’M ON TOP OF THE WORLD. THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS. EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE IS SO BEAUTIFUL.

i’m writing this because i want to be able to remember what it feels like to be happy, from the bottom of my heart. I’m a worrier and I’m constantly bombarded by my negative thoughts. I’m always doubting myself, questioning my self worth, shooting down my own ideas because they are too idealistic and not practical. but i decided today that FUCK THAT. I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT. I’M TIRED OF PUTTING MYSELF DOWN. I LOVE MYSELF. I DON’T WANT TO LIVE A LIFE OF RESTRICTION AND LIMITATION, BUT A LIFE OF FREEDOM AND AUTONOMY. 

i know i’m far from perfect. i don’t have a poppin jawline (i’m getting there though), my forehead is too big, my cheeks are too chubby, i don’t have a flat belly, my thighs are too thick, my hair is frizzy and knotty 9 outta 10 days, i make too many sexual jokes, i overthink too much, i don’t excel academically, i’m not athletic, i sometimes still hesitate before talking to people because of anxiety. the list is endless but i’ve had enough of trying to cover up my flaws and pretending to be someone i’m not. as much as i want to be socially accepted and crave external validation, it’s not worth it to put my mental well being at risk in pursuit of the illusion of perfection. this is not the kinda lifestyle i want. i don’t want to live in self-denial, self-doubt and hesitation again. i’ve lost myself before and the emotional pain it cost me is unbearable and to prevent myself from slipping into my old self, i need to take action and be in charge of my life.

so here’s my proposal: do what makes me happy, acknowledge and accept my flaws and work on becoming a better person. It is that simple. and no, saying “i love myself” is not a form of narcissism, as opposed to what my old self would think. i love myself because i need it, because self-love is the most powerful weapon against any obstacles. i love myself because it’s the only thing shielding me from self destruction and crippling anxiety. i love myself. 

Asylum!5SOS Prologue

Calum: 17: Pyromania - an obsessive desire to set fire to things.

Calum had always loved to play with fire. He spent most of his childhood staring at the lit fireplace, throwing twigs in that he had collected and watching them turn into ash. He was bullied for 5 years by Jonny. He took up smoking because he loved the way it burned, it was therapeutic for him and helped him forget about what the Jonny said and did to him. At the age of 16 he took his love to the next level when Jonny took his lighter and broke it. He burned down his house that night using turpentine and his new lighter, killing Jonny. He felt an overwhelming sense of satisfaction and wasn’t caught for a week, only discovered when he set fire to the forest down the street from the police station, where he was tested and put in Denbigh Asylum.

Mona: 16: Psychopath/serial killer: a person suffering from chronic mental disorder with abnormal or violent social behaviour.

Mona grew up in an abusive family, often watching her father beat her mother for minuscule mistakes. When she reached the age of 11, her father began using her as a prostitute, selling sex to his friends for money, and for himself. She got severe depression very quickly due to the excessive amounts of times she was raped. She lived in her father’s basement for most of her life until she devised a plot. She carried a knife in her boots on her 16th birthday, the night when her father set her up to have sex with 3 of his friends over the space of 1 hour. She slit the rapists neck when he were mid-orgasm, leaving with the money and moving onto the next repeating each method. When she came home she found her father asleep, and stabbed him 6 times in the chest, being careful not to stab any major organ, letting him bleed out, carefully watching with a smirk on her face.  On each man’s chest, she carved a message. She was caught 2 hours later and put in Denbigh Asylum.

 

Michael: 21: Severe Intermittent explosive disorder – Repeated episodes of impulsive, aggressive, violent behaviour or angry verbal outbursts in which you react grossly out of proportion to the situation.

Michael lived a fairly normal childhood with loving parents and had many friends for a while, despite having a few anger issues, but it was taken away when he was 14. When he was a toddler he would hit his parents if he didn’t get his way, which developed into beating people up from the age of 5 when they said something that was ever so slightly out of line. He began losing all his friends in fear that he would hurt them. He was expelled in 4 schools by the age of 13 due to his explosive behaviour then was sent to a school specifically for children with anger issues. He was kept there for a year until another child said something about him which sent him into a rage, beating the boy close to death. When they managed to restrain him, they sent him to West Park Asylum to live until he learned to control his impotent rage. 

Nadia: 19: Bipolar: characterized by both manic and depressive episodes, or manic ones only.

Nadia grew up in a strict Christian household, having a long list of what she could and couldn’t do. Failure to abide by the rules led to being punished, Nadia’s least favourite was being caned by her father. However, Nadia became less and less affected by the spanking which gave her some confidence to rebel. She started hanging out with the stoners of her school, joining them in daily sessions getting high by the river at the age of 14. After 2 years of smoking at least 4 times a week, she had a bad reaction causing her to get severe bipolar disorder, switching from the happiest girl in the world who had endless possibilities, into a rage, causing her to braking everything in sight. Sometimes she would just curl up in a corner to cry for hours. Her parents took her out of school when she was 17 so she couldn’t harm anyone. They brought in priests, psychiatrists, nuns and even an exorcist to try and rid her of her disorder, but it only made things worse when she was left alone one night. Her parents arrived home and not a single item remained intact, except Nadia’s extensive record collection. The next morning, she was taken to West Park Asylum.

Luke: 15 Schizophrenia a long-term mental disorder of a type involving a breakdown in the relation between thought, emotion, and behaviour, leading to faulty perception, inappropriate actions and feelings, withdrawal from reality and personal relationships into fantasy and delusion, and a sense of mental fragmentation.

Luke’s mother had severe schizophrenia, where she was sent to High Royds asylum by her parents,. Schizophrenia can be hereditary, which is how Luke got his. He began hallucinating and became delusional, often talking to people that were not there. This began from an early age and his parents just though he was talking to an imaginary friend that is common for children have, but when he began talking to multiple people after the age of 12, his parents took him to hospital, where he was diagnosed with mild schizophrenia. Things got worse as he grew up, despite receiving regular sessions of counselling and medication. At 15, he often woke up to hear his hallucinations taunting him, causing him to scream and pull at his hair. This went on until his mother decided to send him to the same asylum she went to in hopes that it would help him as much as it helped her. 

Evangeline: 15: Borderline personality disorder is a cluster-B personality disorder, the essential feature of which is a pattern of marked impulsivity and instability of affects, interpersonal relationships and self-image.

Evangeline developed Borderline Personality disorder when she was 11, being diagnosed when she was 12 after she grew too close to a boyfriend, they had a mature sexual relationship where they shared everything with each other. He was her only friend and she trusted him with everything, they were communicating 20/7 and clinging to him whenever they were together, until he heartlessly dumped her in front of all the students in the cafeteria leaving her empty. He abandoned her, when she needed him most as her parents had decided to get a divorce that morning so her father could run off with the neighbour’s dog-walker. Her mother couldn’t deal with her mood swings, and put her in High Royds Asylum when she threatened to kill herself if her mother left her alone to go on a date at the age of 14.

Ash: 25: Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

Ash joined the army at the age of 16 because he wanted to fight for his country. He served for 7 years, losing many friends throughout the war. When he was 20, he married his high school sweet heart in Iraq as she joined the military alongside Ash. However, when they were out on a rescue mission, they were ambushed. Ashton screamed as he watched his wife get shot in the chest 4 times and once between her eyes. He managed to escape but was removed from his duty due to extreme behaviour changes after the death of his wife. He was treated for post-traumatic stress disorder or ‘shell shock’ in Whittingham Asylum. He only came in for counselling 3 times a week, but due to the severity of his case, he became a residential patient.

Leia: 22: Mute with social anxiety.

Leia was born mute, struggling with words her entire life. She could only speak small and simple sentences, but her school work said otherwise, giving her A+ grades in many classes. Due to her inability to talk, she felt very isolated and eventually cut off many friendship bonds she had formed. She was bullied by her fellow students because she couldn’t speak more than 2 words without stuttering. She eventually developed social anxiety because of the lack of social communication, becoming afraid to talk to more than 1 person at a time. Her friends and family got worried about her social anxiety and being mute so she began receiving counselling at Whittingham Asylum, one of the best. Her mother bought a room for her to stay in, against Leia’s will, as it was too far for her to travel and her mother was tired of taking care of her.

A Splash of Colour

I’m not sure whether this was a prompt? I think it was? In any case, it’s written now, based off of this post. Thanks for your prompt* (Still not really sure if you were actually sending a prompt, or just showing me a post). Thanks to hartbigguyz for being super efficient at emails and reading this.

Hannah loves to read. She loves all kinds of books.

Once, Hannah read that mantis shrimp have twelve types of colour receptors, and that humans only have three. Which seems fitting, because Hannah’s only ever seen three colours. Not that she counts white, grey, and black as ‘colours’. Not really anyway.

Keep reading

When I first met you I never thought I could love this deep but when my eyes met yours I fell in love with you quick I got lost in those endless brown eyes and appeared in another world where everything was nice where the only reality was you and me in a world where I could be free being the prisoner of your imagination staying in the cell of your heart I feel all this sensations just by looking deep into your eyes I can’t stop staring and don’t want to stop looking I want to get lost one more time and forget about the people surrounding me so don’t say a word, just look at me.
—  Unknown
Worried for all the idols

The idols have worked so hard, form their trainee days till now. I think that the korean entertainment industry is the most exhausting one among all the other countries. They have endless debuts, comebacks, concerts, world tours, everything. It didnt cross my mind until recently, just how many of them lost weight, the dark circles, the eye bags, constantly having to go hospitals for IV drips. They have worked hard to come this far, but to see that they have to give up their health like this…its upsetting. especially with the recent car accident of Ladies’ code. I rather they stop debuting more people all at once and take their time to train them. Not dump all of them out like this. It isnt fair on them or the fans. and let the current idols have little rest whenever they can, not make them work like cows.

They are humans too, they need their rest. They are not machines that only need a little oil for them to be back in top form. If this continues many of them will fall or be too sick to perform…

3

4.3

He had a beautiful face, sweet innocent child, a prince every little girl secretly dreamed about. However it was a heart of a monster that made him so precious and desirable to her. There was no light in those perfectly sculpted eyes, no kindness, no warmth, no compassion, but an ambition, an endless hunger to posses everything this world had to offer. In the dim light of a small dusty room his profile looked almost angelic. Perhaps both of them were simply antagonized by the universe, after all there was no virtue that could overpower one’s beauty…
“You’re staring…” - Abe’s voice interrupted her thoughts.
“It’s not my fault you’re happened to be the only thing in this room that is worth to be looked at.” - She shrugged.
“You were the one one who demanded for it to be believable…”
“I wasn’t complaining.”
For a moment both went silent, looking around small shabby room they both had to call home for the time being. Letty couldn’t tell how long it will take for Sanders to realize she was missing. At first, he will blame her absence on what he called ‘that ginormous libido of hers’, neither of them were faithful and Richmond was more than aware of the fact that she bedded other men on weekly basis. After a day or two he will find it suspicious and contact her sister, who should send him on the right pass, since she was well aware of Colette’s masterplan. They never kept secrets from one one another. After all they shared more than same blood, they shared one soul, one mind and in fact were one sole entity.
Last time she met up with Odette the evening of the same day, Abe showed up at her office Le Parnasse…