hunts have everyone all locked up inside. Waiting for it to end…It
always does, always has, y'know. Since forever. But it won’t end very
nicely, not this time. Even some folks hiding inside are goin’ bad. The
screams of womenfolk, the stench of blood, the snarls of beasts… none
of em’s too uncommon now. Yharnam’s done fer, I tell ya…”
I went into Black Sails expecting pirates. I did not expect a revolution against England (aka the homophobic racist patriarchy in country form) led by a black woman, a bisexual man and an amputee Slytherin with assistance from former slaves and sex workers. Also, womenfolk doing the business! Spies and queens and counsellors and pirates and madames and everything in between. I love this show so much :D
The last 10 days of Ramadan has come. There is a great sunnah called: I'tikaf.
Please remember us in your dua'as.
Objects and Advantages of I'tikaf
The reward of “Itikaf is great. The mere fact that the Messenger of Allah (saw) always performed it is sufficient to explain the virtues that are attached to it. The example of the one that resides in the, masjid in I'tikaf is like the person who, having gone to a high personage to appeal for his needs, remains there until it is granted, He thus says to Allah: “0 Allah! I have placed my humble request before You and have faith in Your generosity; and I shall not move from here until my request is granted by You,” When someone comes begging at the door and then refuses to leave until his request is granted, it is certain that even the most selfish person will eventually accede to one’s request; and how much more Merciful is Allah.
In every moment of I'tikaf one remains in lbadah (worship), even when asleep, one is still in His service, striving for nearness to Him. Allah says, according to a hadith,
“Whoever draws near to Me an arms length, then I draw nearer to him two arm lengths; and whoever draws nearer to Me by walking, I draw nearer to him by running.”
It is also deduced from the various narrations that one of the major objects of I'tikaf during Ramadan is to search for Laylatul Qadr (the Night of Power), What better manner can there be than to remain in ibadah at all times, whether one is awake or asleep, to obtain the reward of 1,000 months (over 83 years) of worship, Furthermore, in I'tikaf one is free from all daily tasks and thus has all the time to devote to dhikrullah (remembrance of Allah) and meditation.
Virtues of I'tikaf
Ibn ‘Abbas relates that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said: “The person performing I'tikaf remains free from sins and he is indeed given the same reward as all those who do righteous deeds (in spite of his not having done those deeds as a result of having been secluded in the masjid).”
Conditions of I'tikaf
The following are conditions for performance of I'tikaf:
1. to be a Muslim.
2. To be sane,
3. To be clean from major impurity, monthly menses, and bleeding of childbirth,
4. To perform I'tikaf in a masjid (for males only),
5. To form the niyyah (intention) for I'tikaf.
6. To fast for wajib and sunnah I'tikaf (discussed below).
Note: Women may observe I'tikaf in the home. It is also not necessary to have reached the age of puberty to observe I'tikaf; therefore an intelligent child (male or female) may observe I'tikaf.
Types of I'tikaf
There are three types of I'tikaf:
1. Wajib I'tikaf: I'tikaf becomes compulsory (wajib) when a person makes it obligatory upon himself. For instance, when a person makes a vow of thanks-giving to Allah that if Allah fulfills a certain wish of his, he will perform so many … days of I'tikaf. In this case, the moment his wish is fulfilled, I'tikaf becomes compulsory. Or, a person may merely make an unconditional vow whereby he makes I'tikaf compulsory upon himself for a certain number of days. This becomes a duty on him from that moment onwards.
A wajib I'tikaf cannot be for less than one day and one night and has to be performed while fasting, irrespective of whether the fast is specifically for this purpose or not. If the niyyah is for several days then the same number of nights will also have to be spent in I'tikaf. The I'tikaf will thus begin before sunset and terminate at sunset after the avowed number of days has been completed. The night proceeds the day in Islamic reckoning. The intention for this type of I'tikaf must be pronounced, mere mental niyyah is not sufficient.
2. Sunnah I'tikaf: This I'tikaf was observed by Rasulullah (PBUH) in every year of his stay at Madinah Munawwarah. This I'tikaf means to seclude oneself inside the masjid for the last ten days of Ramadan. This I'tikaf is Sunnatul-mu'akkadah ‘alal-kifayah: that is, if a few persons from the locality observe it, the rest will be exempted. If no one observes it then all the Muslims of that area will be sinful in neglecting this sunnah. The niyyah for Sunnah I'tikaf is that a firm intention should be made for this purpose before the sun sets on the 20th of Ramadan, in the masjid that is chosen for the I'tikaf. It terminates at sunset if the crescent is sighted on the 29th or on the 30th of Ramadan. There is no prescribed salah to be performed for this purpose. It is noteworthy that generally no Nafl salah should be performed after 'Asr salah until Maghrib.
3. Nafl l'tikaf: There is no special time or specific number of days for Nafl l'tikaf. A person may form the niyyah for any number of days at any time of the year, even for his whole life. While Imam Abu Hanifah ® states that it cannot be for less than a full day, Imam Muhammad ® states that there is no limit as to the minimum period of time. It could even be for just a few seconds. The fatwa is on this latter view. There is no fast associated with this type of I'tikaf. .It is desirable for anyone entering a masjid to make the niyyah for I'tikaf as long as he will remain in the masjid. So, while he is in 'ibadah (worship), he also gains the reward of I'tikaf.
It is advisable for everyone who comes to join the congregational prayers to form an intention of I'tikaf upon entering the masjid. This will mean that as long as he remains busy with salah, dhikr,’ listening to religious lectures, etc. He also receives the reward for I'tikaf.
Itikaf for Females
Females should perform I'tikaf in the room set aside for prayer inside their homes. Where, however, no such room exists, and the desire to observe I'tikaf is present, the room where salah is normally performed should be set aside for this seclusion. If salah is performed in the bedroom, I'tikaf could be performed there. The domestic duties should be carried out by the daughters or servants while the person in I'tikaf remains constantly in 'ibadah in her room.
I'tikaf is a much easier task for women, for in fact, she remains in the confines of her room at home and receives the same great rewards of I'tikaf. It is very unfortunate that in spite of this ease, our womenfolk still remain deprived of the blessings of I'tikaf. Generally this Sunnah is neglected so much so that many have not even heard of it!
Additional Rules for Females in I'tikaf In addition to the general rules of I'tikaf that apply to men, there are some rules that apply to women only:
a. A woman may perform I'tikaf in the room that is used for her daily salah.
b. A woman must have the permission of her husband for I'tikaf. Once the husband has consented to his wife’s I'tikaf, he then cannot withdraw his permission.
c. If there is no person to serve her meals during I'tikaf, the woman is allowed to go to the kitchen to prepare a quick simple meal.
d. If, during the I'tikaf, the woman has her hadith (monthly menses) or nifas (bleeding after child birth), the I'tikaf is nullified. She has to observe make-up of the remaining days after she is pure again. This is if the I'tikaf was a wajib or Sunnah, in which the vowed number of days was fixed. In the case where the Itikaf was a wajib in which the days vowed for were not fixed in number, she will have to observe make-up of the full I'tikaf. e. A woman is allowed to sleep on her bed and use a chair while she is in Itikaf. She could also walk around in the room for a short while to relieve the stiffness in her limbs.
When a Mu'takif could leave the Masjid or place of Itikaf
The Mu'takif (a person in I'tikaf) could leave the defined masjid area for the following reasons only. If he/she leaves for any reason other than the under mentioned then the I'tikaf will terminate forthwith. When going out for these necessities do not spend more time than is absolutely required. Return as soon as possible and do not talk to anyone. If someone greets you, it is wajib to only answer.
a. To answer the call of nature when necessary.
b. To perform wudu when the wudu’ terminates (breaks). It is not permissible to leave the masjid to perform wudu’ when one still has wudu’. When out of the masjid for these necessities it is permissible for one to greet others and to reply to their Salam.
c. To perform the wajib bath (due to a wet dream). If one leaves the masjid to have a shower to cool off on a hot day or a bath for Friday, the I'tikaf will be nullified. When going out for wudu’ it is permissible to have a wash while performing wudu’, provided it is done in the same time during which wudu’ is made.
d. To perform Jum'ah salah if it is not performed in that masjid. It is only permissible to leave for Jum'ah just prior to the commencement of the khutbah. One must return immediately after performing the Sunnah rak'at succeeding the Jum'ah.
When a Mu'takif cannot leave the Masjid or place of I'tikaf allowed to leave the defined masjid area for the under mentioned reasons. If he does leave, even though for a few seconds, either intentionally or unintentionally, his I'tikaf will be nullified.
a. Because of illness or fear.
b. To visit the sick.
c. To attend a Janazah salah.
d. To extinguish a fire or save a drowning person outside of the masjid area.
e. To wash hands, gargle, and brush teeth or to expectorate (spit). (These should all be done while performing wudu’). To fetch a glass of water.
f. To assist the caretaker in his duties outside the masjid area.
[Note: in situations (a) and (d) it will be permissible to leave the masjid but the I'tikaf will be nullified and for example, if it is a wajib I'tikaf, then quad will be necessary.]
What is allowed during Itikaf?
The following are allowed in the masjid during the Itikaf:
a. To eat and sleep
b. To change clothes.
c. To clip the nails or trim the moustache.
d. To recite the Our'an aloud or recite tasbih or dhikr with a raised voice if it does not disturb others.
e. To have religious discussions and lectures and to speak about lawful matters.
What is disallowed during I’tikaf?
The following are not allowed in the masjid during the I'tikaf:
a. To talk about worldly affairs, backbite or tell an untruth.
b. To remain silent and regard it as 'ibadah.
c. To shave the beard.
What to do during I'tikaf
All the time spent in I'tikaf should be beneficially used for 'ibadah. This is the opportunity when one is able to observe all those devotions that could not be normally carried out. The fard salah should be performed with meticulous care and humbleness and without haste. The most virtuous act is reciting the Our'an, thereafter du'a, istighfar, and nafl salah.
There is undoubtedly a great link between the month of Ramadan and the Holy Our'an. Almost all Allah’s Divine Scriptures were revealed in this month. Therefore for those in sunnah I'tikaf the most virtuous act, after the farg salah, is the recitation of Allah’s final Book to humanity - the Our'an. An effort should be made to complete at least one khatam during the sunnah I'tikaf.
I'tikaf is the opportune time to communicate with Allah, to beseech of Him, to ask Him for forgiveness and to ask Him for all one’s needs. In the hadith it is said: “Du'a is the essence of’ ibadah.” For forgiveness of sins the Sayyidul-Istighfar should be recited as many times as possible.
Friends we’re so #blessed that Men are finally acknowledging that harry styles is actually talented. After six years, five hit albums, billions in record sales, enormous sold out world tours, FINALLY the Men are on board so harry is officially a Real Artist. Thank you, males of earth, for always being the ultimate authority on literally everything. What would we flimsy womenfolk do without you. All this time we thought he was just cute. But it turns out he’s actually a Good Musician?! Amazing. ✨
The Woman should know that what she is afflicted with of harm and pain during pregnancy, childbirth, or bringing up the children in young age (breast-feeding etc), then indeed that is a raising of her rank and expiation of her sins if she hopes for the reward of it from Allah.
فتاوى نور على الدرب، ١١/٢٨٠
Our mothers, wives, daughters, sisters, neices.. they should be honoured rather than follow suit of those who have made our womenfolk nothing more than pieces of flesh for consumption by weak eyes, desires and weak hearts.
Medieval Irish Literature: The Táin - Fedelm, The Woman Poet of Connacht.
Dia duit, a cairde,
I would like to share you all a story from Ireland, passed down to us from within the Táin. It is not a story in its own right, but it is a short tale of a girl named Fedelm. I tell of her story with more attention than there was meant to be, but you will all find delight in it nonetheless. Although a minor character within the Táin, she tells of the doom that lies ahead for a great army ready to march. Here is her tale:
The charioteer turned the chariot around and made to set off. But they saw a young grown girl in front of them. She had yellow hair. She wore a speckled cloak fastened around her with a gold pin, a red-embroidered hooded tunic and sandals with gold clasps. Her brow was broad, her jaw narrow, her two eyebrows pitch black, with delicate dark lashes casting shadows half down her cheeks. You would think her lips were inset with Parthian scarlet. Her teeth were like an array of jewels between the lips. She had hair in three tresses: two wound upward on her head and the third hanging down her back, brushing her calves. She held a light gold weaving-rod in her hand, with gold inlay. Her eyes had triple irises. Two black horses drew her chariot, and she was armed.
“What is your name?” Medb said to the girl.
“I am Fedelm, and I am a woman poet of Connacht.”
“Where have you come from?” Medb said.
“From learning verse and vision in Alba (Scotland),” the girl said.
“Have you the imbas forasnai, the Light of Foresight?” Medb said.
“Yes I have,” the girl said.
“Then look for me and see what will become of my army.”
So the girl looked.
Medb said, “Fedelm, prophetess; how sees thou the host?”
Fedelm said in reply:
“I see it crimson, I see it red.”
“It can’t be true,” Medb said. “Conchobor is suffering his pangs in Emain with all the rest of the Ulster warriors. My messengers have come from there and told me. Fedelm, prophetess; how sees thou our host?” Medb said.
“I see it crimson, I see it red,” said the girl.
“That is false,” Medb said. “Celtchar mac Uthidir is still in Dún Lethglaise with a third of Ulster’s forces, and Fergus son of Roach mach Echdach and his troop of three thousand are here with us in exile. Fedelm, prophetess; how sees thou our host?” Medb said.
“I see it crimson, I see it red,” said the girl.
“It doesn’t matter,” Medb said. “Wrath and rage and red wounds are common the armies and large forces gather. So look once more and tell us the truth. Fedelm, prophetess; how sees thou our host?”
“I see it crimson, I see it red,” said the girl.
“I see battle: a blond man with much blood about his belt and a hero-halo round his head. His brow is full of victories.
Seven hard heroic jewels are set in the iris of his eye. His jaws are settled in a snarl. He wears a lopped, red tunic.
A noble countenance I see, working effect on womenfolk; a young man of sweet coloring; a form dragons in the fray.
His great valor brings to mind Cúchulainn of Murtheimne, the hound of Culann, full of fame. Who he is I cannot tell but I see, now, the whole host colored crimson by his hand.
A giant on the plain I see, doing battle with the host, holding in each of his two hands four short quick swords.
I see him hurling against that host two gae bolga and a spear and an ivory-hilted sword, each weapon to its separate task.
He towers on the battlefield in breastplate and red cloak. Across the sinister chariot-wheel the Warped Man deals death - that fair from I first beheld melted to a mis-shape.
I see him moving to the fray: take warning, watch him well, Cúchulainn, Sualdam’s son! Now I see him in pursuit.
Whole hosts he will destroy, making dense massacre. In thousands you will yield your heads. I am Fedelm. I hide nothing.
The blood starts from warrior’s wounds - total ruin - at his touch: your warriors dead, the warriors of Deda mac Sin prowling loose; torn corpses, women wailing, because of him - the Forge-Hound.”
Source: Thomas Kinsella trans., The Táin - From the Irish epic Táin Bó Cuailnge. (Oxford University Press, 1969), 60-64.
Wearing all these couple shirts, traveling to all these tourist spots,taking all these selfies then posting it up on all your on social media accounts, captioning it “Having a blast with the wifey.” or such.
Hey brother! Are you happy that thousands of nonMahram are feasting over the beauty of your wife online!?
How about you sister, still haven’t had enough of posting pictures with your hubby?Talking and sharing so much about how he loves you and cares for you and all these fairy tale like stories?
Sister! You are one fine jealous woman, yet you post on your instagram photos of your hubby every single day and you get angry with him when hundreds of sisters go and follow his page as a result of that?
So I guess, it is about time that I answer you with Wallah,where is your ghirah? _____
No offense, but “most” of the things I have seen online is just indescribably alarming and for some reasons inappropriate.
I have seen a lot of single sisters that at the time when they finally get married, so many photos of them flood their accounts, and same way happens to the brothers - making it as if marriage is just a thing to show off on the internet nowadays.
My dear, keep your “you’re just bitter ‘coz you are not married” comments on your pocket, because this isn’t about that!
I need you all to take a time and reflect from this, whether you are married or not or getting engaged or whatever your civil status is! Ghirah applies to it, not only to married couples!
There are a lot of ghirah related excerpts from the lives of the Sahabah RA, but today I will narrate two. _____
The Messenger of Allah Sallallahu Alaihi Wassalaam said: “Whilst I was sleeping, I saw myself in Paradise, and there was a woman doing wudhu beside a palace. I said, ‘Whose is this palace?’ They said, ‘(It is) ‘Umar’s.’ Then I remembered your protective jealousy so I turned away.”
‘Umar wept and said, “Would I feel protective jealousy towards you, O’ Messenger of Allah?’”
Al Mugheerah Ibn Shub’ah RA narrated that Sa’d Ibn ‘Ubaadah RA said, "If I saw a man with my wife I would
strike him with the sharp edge of my sword.“ His statement was told to the Messenger of
Allah Sallalahu Alaihi Wassalaam and he said, "Are you amazed
at the ghirah of Sa’d? For indeed, I have more ghirah than him and Allah is more ghirah than me." _____
Why did I choose these two? Because these two great men are known for their well established ghirah over their womenfolk.
Look at ‘Umar, look at how he has established his ghirah that even the Messenger of Allah Sallallahu Alaihi Wassalaam was greatly impacted by it, that he would turn away from situations like that because he knows well of the ghirah of ‘Umar.
And how about Sa’d, such ghirah that when the Messenger of Allah Sallallahu Alaihi Wassalaam heard about his statement, he got amazed and was able to mention and compare the ghirah of Allah over him and over Sa’d’s.
There is no harm in establishing yourself amongst your companions and family. There is no harm when you give them the impression that there are limits that have been set and there are things that you wish not to share and discuss with them.
Establish the ghirah. Let them feel it. Once you have done it, see how it makes life easier. Less idle talks, more time for spending time with family and worshipping Allah.
I know, and I do not prevent you in any way showing appreciation to your spouses online. Indeed, it’s good to write how you appreciate your spouse and all that, but for a reason or two social media is not the right place to do it. Yes, you can do and write it every now and then but do not overdo it.
You have your humble abode, your life behind this computer screen to show and make your spouse how much you appreciate all the things that he/she does for you every single day. Do it there. Make him/her feel more special each passing day. Share the moment together, do not spoil it by inviting the whole world to it. _____
I know, ghirah isn’t only applied to married couples, but even to your family or Muslim brothers and sisters, you can call their attention and privately advice when you see them doing inappropriate acts towards the opposite sex.
And ghirah as well pertains to yourself, let me end this by reminding you of what Ibn Al Qayyim Rahimahullah said:
"The foundation of the Religion is Ghirah, and the one without Ghirah is one without Religion, for Ghirah protects the heart and enlivens the limbs, and shields one from evil and lewdness, and lack of Ghirah kills the heart so that the limbs die, so that there remains not even shielding from [the minor things].
And the example of Ghirah in the heart is the example of the strength that shields one from sickness and fights it off, so if the strength leaves, he will be faced with the sickness, and will not find anything to protect himself from it, so it will establish itself [within him] and destroy him.”
And we pray that Allah makes it easy for us to establish ghirah within ourselves. Amin.
Stories were taken from
• Muslim, hadith no. 2395 • Muslim Ahl As Sunnah wa Al Jama’ah wa As Sahabah, 1/245 • Sahih Al Bukhari, hadith no. 6846 • Saying of Ibn Al Qayyim, Ad-Daa’ Wad-Dawaa’
Welcome back to the story! This is where all the awful angst comes in and I’m just going to apologize in advance for the next several chapters. I’m sorry guys :( Tony has the worst coping skills in the world.
PLEASE reblog this fic for me! Show some love and get it out there so more people can read it!! I would SO appreciate it!
Tony was… deliriously happy these days. Was happy even a big enough word for how he felt? Was delirious even the right adjective? He- brilliant super genius that he was- had no better words for this. This bond. These moments.
When Clint had reached out and took his hand as they bought groceries at the mom and pop store at the edge of the national forest. When a little girl had asked her mommy if those two men were in love and Clint bent Tony backwards and kissed him without even hesitating. At night, when Tony sat in front of the fire on the floor of the cabin, and glanced up to see his mate staring, chest heaving, wings trembling, eyes shading red as the Alpha took over and he moved forward to claim Tony again. And again and again and again.
Their bonding heat had only lasted six or seven hours, but then Clint had spent an extra week showing Tony exactly how much he loved him. Not so much with words, no, because neither man was very good at that.
But with actions.
Feeding Tony in bites when they ate. Washing the omega every time they showered. Making Tony come again and again before Clint even thought about his own pleasure. Wrapping them in arms and wings and sleeping together until the sun rose again and they got to do it all over.
When they had returned to the tower, Tony had dragged Clint past everyone, ignoring all the hellos and well wishing, up to his suite to “properly christen the place” as a newly bonded couple and when they had come back down two hours later, the team had whooped and laughed and hugged, and exchanged money because they had been taking bets on how long the two would be upstairs.
And now, two weeks later, things were still wonderful. Sure they were busy and spent more nights apart than together, but that was to be expected with Clint having his own missions outside of the Avengers, and Tony still having to run Stark Industries. Clint sought him out every second when he was home, and they had tried and nearly succeeded to have sex everywhere in the common area, cleaning it frantically afterwards, laughing at how the team would react if they knew.
Tony was pretty sure the team knew. But as long as the room smelled like bleach afterwards nobody said a thing.
The Utter and Egregious Fallacy of “That Was Just What Happened In Medieval Times”
Right, so. I’m angry all over again and I’m going to be angry for a while, because if I see one more idiot defending the rape scene over the fact that “that was just what happened in medieval times,” I am going to put a brick through my computer screen. This won’t be as long or as in-depth as I want it to be, since I have to go to work soon, but my medieval historian buttons have been pushed to a sufficient degree that I have to make some response to all this. So without further ado:
Legislation to protect women and children was an idea as far back as the seventh goddamn century (and before), but it certainly appeared in the western Christian/Latin legal canon with Adamnan of Iona’s “Law of the Innocents.” Christianity itself modified existing Greco-Roman social codes to give women (who had no rights at all in antiquity) a surprising amount of protection and recognition in marriage and society. Was this always followed? Of course not. But you can bet your ass it was a thing, and one of the reasons early Christianity was so suspiciously received, due to its lenient treatment of women, slaves, the poor, the leprous, and other outcasts.
On that note, we call them “the Dark Ages” because we are a bunch of Eurocentric assholes who figure all of civilization collapsed when Rome fell. Yes, Western Europe wasn’t doing so hot, but everywhere else was flourishing – socially, culturally, religiously, artistically.
The Vikings were forward-thinking as hell with their legal treatment of women (so, for that matter, were the Welsh). Both cultures allowed a wife to separate from her husband with no penalty if he was abusing her, and in the Vikings’ case, he would be shamed and socially ridiculed for being such a low-down tool as to mistreat a woman. The Vikings did not fuck around. And among the Welsh, maternal inheritance and property rights counted just as much as paternal.
Rape was physically and brutally punishable in England from at least the 11th century on. Prior to the Norman Conquest, it was treated as an offense for which one had to pay weregild – literally “man money” – the same as when someone was murdered. Post-Norman Conquest, you got your goddamn dick chopped off, the same as thieves lost a hand and oathbreakers lost tongues. You see the pattern? It was a serious crime. People weren’t just out raping all and sundry. The Anglo-Saxon Chronicle (otherwise not fond of William) eulogized him as a “violent but very wise” man, and praised him for making England so safe that an unarmed man or maiden girl could travel the roads without fear of robbery or molestation.
If you were a dude that everyone hated, you got accused of rape and mistreatment of women. It wasn’t cool.
Due to the teachings of the third century Roman physician Galen, it was believed that a woman could not conceive if she didn’t have an orgasm. No, this does not mean that medieval couples were trying positions from the Kama Sutra every night (the Church still had strict guidelines on when and where and how you were supposed to do the do) but it also doesn’t mean that women’s pleasure was some completely mystical and/or unthinkable idea.
Likewise, early consummation DID happen (Margaret Beaufort, Eleanor of Castile) but it was frowned on. The Church imposed penalties on husbands who consummated their marriage too early, and while noble girls were generally married around 14-16, commoner girls were about the same age as today (early-mid twenties) and could often marry for love, depending on their social station.
While marital rape and abuse was not legally recognized or classified as a crime, that didn’t mean it went unpunished. Since most noble marriages were business transactions, that meant the wife was an investment of some value, and a sure way to piss off her menfolk (and the Pope) was to mistreat and abuse her. King Philip II of France spent years under interdict and excommunication for his appalling treatment of his second wife, Ingeborg, and was ultimately forced to capitulate and take her back. The Pope would in fact often champion the causes of mistreated noble wives (usually to force concessions out of her husband, but still). Annulment and separation, while unusual, were not completely impossible, and did happen – one of the chief grounds for it being granted was mistreatment and abuse.
Furthermore, the code of chivalry specified honorable treatment for noblewomen. Of course, this did not mean it was lived out in practice, and common women were fair game, but there was in fact an existing and well-known legal framework for how you were supposed to treat your womenfolk – Ramsay would have been as reviled in the medieval era as he is to our modern sensibilities. Medieval people weren’t different from us and out rape rape rapin the livelong day. In fact, I would hazard a guess that it’s gotten MORE common now that we, you know, no longer chop the goddamn dicks off people and they generally skate with no consequence.
Besides, the “the medieval era was dark and barbaric” attitude relies on the mistaken narrative of “progress,” i.e. things were terrible back then and have been constantly evolving to this point in time, where we no longer do the gross things they did. DING DONG YOU ARE WRONG! This is a historiographical fallacy to excuse our own atrocities and act like the cost of the modern world was “necessary” for “developing” us to who we are now, and that all the bloodshed, death, colonialism, world wars, etc can’t possibly be as bad as what they did Back In The Day. Saying “people got raped back then!” is implicitly saying “and they don’t get raped today, because Progress.” It’s incredibly stupid and hypocritical. So don’t even start that shit with me.
Last, these are not real events magically happening outside anyone’s control. This is a television show written by 21st century people. They have repeatedly used rape as a clumsy plot device in the past. They continued to do so and twisted it this time to happen to a beloved major character purely for the self-admitted purpose of shock value. They planned it since season 2 and waited for Sophie Turner to come of age so they could shoot it legally. So acting like GoT is this pseudo “medieval world” where nobody had any control over the fact that Sansa was put in a position to be violated by Ramsay is again, laughably facetious. They manipulated the story, characters, and narrative to be sure that this happened. They made a writing choice. Hence we are going to criticize that writing choice. We have as much right to do that as they do to create it in the first place. It’s called consequences. “Free speech” does not mean you get to say whatever you want and no one can challenge or correct you. It means the government can’t put you in jail or otherwise legally harass you with the mechanisms of the state for it. Someone else using their free speech to call you a fucking idiot is perfectly legal.
In conclusion: No, the medieval era was not some beacon of rights and happiness for women. Terrible things could and did happen. But they excited just as much public outrage as they did today, and were oftentimes more harshly punished (at least if you were noble born, because CLASSISM! Take a shot). Every bit of development and progress we HAVE made was extremely hard won. But quit acting like it was just an inevitable, normal, and necessary fact of life in medieval times. Because you know nothing, Jon Snow.
Here we go again. Poldark is back, and even if you’re not a fan of the series you will know that this means Aidan Turner oozing rugged manliness on our TV screens all summer long.
The Dublin actor is what the young call ‘A Ride’, and his Cornish hero Ross Poldark is manly in the way that men were manly before hair gel, paternity leave and yoga.
Watching him gallop along a clifftop (in all weathers), brood at polite parties, and generally behave like the man least likely to see the point of couples therapy, just does it - shamingly enough - for 21st-century womenfolk. Unfortunately for Turner, this means that he is, until further notice, carrier of the 'Real Man’ torch, and he doesn’t much like it.
He denies deserving the title and has even - who can blame him - tried to shift the focus on to his dad, describing him in a recent interview as the genuine article: “a real man” who can “fix a vintage car, do plumbing, lay flooring”.
Point taken. But being a DIY whizz is the least of being a real man in 2017.
Here are 10 attributes that make a bloke, in our eyes, Just Poldark Enough:
1. Not fussing about your hair
It is hard to strike the balance between caring and preening peacock, but a manly man is never that interested in his hair (see Poldark’s salty-dog do). Note: the Boris Johnson hair thing is something different.
2. Not having three kinds of waxed Barbour jacket
There’s nothing wrong with being prepared but owning the just-so perfect outfit for every situation is a bit Meghan Markle and not that manly (see Poldark, who only has one coat).
3. Not being easily intimidated
By spiders. By waiters. By the bloke at the party who thinks he’s smarter/richer than you.
4. Entry-level DIY
Never mind tinkering with the car at the weekends (sounds a bit Top Gear to us) but being capable of basic crisis response in the home, like sorting out the beeping smoke alarm without taking a hammer to it.
5. Being good with children
Although Poldark’s son Jeremy mysteriously vanishes for large stretches of time, it only takes a quick glimpse of Ross cradling a tiny baby in his muscular arms for viewers to melt. The manliest men are terrific with babies and are doting dads; we have known that for a long time (see that Athena poster, and Poldark).
6. Being a good driver
In the absence of a horse to gallop along the cliffs. Reversing with an arm slung over the passenger seat is particularly manly.
7. Dog confidence
Dogs that run rings around their owners are not the dogs of manly men. (If Poldark had a dog you know he’d be a firm but fair master and inspire panting devotion - his interactions with Demelza’s dog Garrick are enough to make us swoon.)
8. Not being faddy about food
A manly man does not need to live on pies and ale. But making your own chia milk - tiny bit unmanly.
9. Not indulging in white-knuckle handshakes, in the style of POTUS
This is textbook overcompensation and the opposite of manly.
10. Respecting women
(Poldark’s record on this is, admittedly, patchy, but it is the number one sign of manliness now.)
We’re not interested otherwise - full manly package regardless.
The many moods of a successful marriage
Given his erratic mood swings and infidelity (not to mention that controversial sex scene), Ross Poldark doesn’t immediately strike us as an ideal husband. But according to writer Debbie Horsfield, who adapated Winston Graham’s Cornwall-set saga for the BBC, the hit drama is supposed to offer a guide to a “successful marriage”.
In the series, Aidan Turner’s Poldark hires his maid, Demelza (Eleanor Tomlinson), after defending her in a street brawl. The pair fall in love and get married, but their relationship is marred by Poldark’s obsession with his first love, Elizabeth (Heida Reed), and Demelza’s trauma following the death of her newborn daughter, Julia. Horsfield said: “I always bear in mind the advice Andrew Graham (son of Winston) gave me, which was that his father intended the Poldark saga to be a portrait of a successful marriage.
“By successful he didn’t mean perfect or idyllic, but real … by series three, the fact that they’re still together at all demonstrates staying power.”
So what can Poldark teach us about relationships?
First impressions don’t count
When Ross meets Demelza, she is a street urchin, but once she’s deloused and working in his home, the pair fall in love. On second thought, this may only apply if you’re as ravishing as Eleanor Tomlinson…
The power of delayed gratification
The flirtation between Truro’s resident Hot Doctor Dwight Enys and Lady Caroline Penvenen was drawn out over several weeks before the two managed a rendezvous. By contrast, his hasty affair with a married woman in season one ended up getting her killed. Best not to rush these things.
Don’t bury your feelings
Admittedly, a relationship has its ups and downs, so we’ll mark Poldark’s one-night-stand with Elizabeth plainly a ‘down’. But he and Demelza are trying to make things work — likely thanks to Demelza’s whopping ‘Poldark punch’ after she caught him sneaking home at dawn. If you’ve just learned your husband is cheating on you, as well as squandering your money on a doomed mining enterprise and neglecting your marriage, there’s no time to waste bottling up your emotions, so let it all out.
Don’t let social differences be a barrier to love
This is a big one — Poldark rejects ‘respectable society’ by marrying the lowly Demelza, Caroline ignores her aristocratic father’s wishes to date Enys, and Poldark’s cousin Verity elopes with Captain Andrew Blamey, whose temper caused the accidental death of his first wife. It might seem unwise to disregard the advice of your family in the blind pursuit of love, but such is not the case in the Poldark universe.
Scythe your way to marital bliss
Who can forget the moment in season one when a shirtless Poldark scythed his way into Demelza’s, and the nation’s, heart? Men of Ireland, it may be time to ditch the lawnmower and pick up a scythe of your own. Patience may be required as you learn to handle the tool, but you’ll soon reap the benefits.
Imam Sajjad(a.s.) was about 22 or 23 years old when the sad event of Karbala occured. Since Allah(swt) mentions in his holy Book that this world cannot survive for a moment if there is no Masoom “Imam” present at all times, Allah(swt) arranged it such that Imam Sajjad(a.s.) became severly ill during that battle and could not participate as a warrior. He asked the permission to fight in the battle but Imam Hussain(a.s.) told him that he had been assigned a different type of “Jihad” that was to start after the martyrdom of Imam Hussain(a.s.) - namely leading the women and children of the household of Prophet Mohammad(pbuh&hf) into the bazars and courts of Kufa and Damascus. Imam Sajjad(a.s.) was made a prisoner of war together with the whole family of the Prophet Mohammad(pbuh&hf). It was at this time that he was given the responsibility of Imamate and his was one of the most difficult times when any Imam was given this responsibility. Truly speaking, for him, it would have been very easy to die on the battle field as a martyr than to be taken as prisoner of war and see all the insult and humiliations thrown on him and on the womenfolk of the house of the Prophet. However, he did what Allah wished him to do.
After the martyrdom of Imam Hussain(a.s.), the survival of Islam depended on Imam Zainul Abideen(a.s.), and that also at a tender age of 22. He had a very hard job of letting the world know the mission of Imam Hussain(a.s.) and exposing the evil intentions of Yazid and the Bani Umayyah. The army of Yazid treated him very badly by putting him in heavy chains. As a prisoner of war, he was made to travel on the open back of a camel in burning sunshine from Kerbala to Kufa and then from Kufa to Shaam (Damascus) - a distance of about 750 kilometres. Sometimes, he would be made to walk on the burning sands of the desert. This was not all. Women and children of the family of the Prophet Muhammad(pbuh&hf), too, were hand-cuffed and treated like they were slaves. The daughters of Imam Ali(a.s.) and Bibi Fatima(s.a.) were treated worse than criminals, their Hijabs were taken away from them.
In the courts of Ibn-e-Ziyad and Yazid, Imam Sajjad(a.s.) gave lion-hearted lectures and presented the true Islam to the listeners and introduced himself and his accompanying members as the descendents of the Prophet Mohammad(pbuh&hf) and the leaders appointed by Allah(swt). His lectures had such an impact on the listeners that despite several attempts to kill him inside the court of both Yazid and Ibn-e-Ziyad could not materialize. Bibi Zainab(s.a.) and other women of the household of Prophet Mohammad(pbuh&hf) became the frontline protectors and were backed by the people in the court of Yazid who had still left some shame in them.
The effect of the speech was so powerful that everybody in the Mosque began to weep and to blame Yazid. Yazid was afraid that if the Imam continued his speech, there would be a revolution and revolt. At the same time Yazid could not stop the Imam and get him down from the Mimber. He therefore ordered a “Muazzin” to give Azan, knowing that this would automatically cut the Imam’s speech. But he underestimated the Imam’s bravery and intelligence. The Imam stopped his speech but did not get down from the Mimber. When the Muazzin said “ Allahu Akber” the Imam testified Allah’s greatness. When the Muazzin said, “Ash hadu anna Muhammaddan Rasulullah”, the Imam stopped the Muazzin from going any further. He then turned to Yezid and asked him.
“Tell me o Yazid, was Muhammad(pbuh&hf) your grandfather or mine? If you say he was your grandfather it will be an open lie and if you say he was my grandfather then why have you killed his son and imprisoned his family? Why have you killed my father and brought his women and children to this city as prisoners?” Yazid had no reply to give.
Yazid had to free the Imam(a.s.) out of fear of his own rulership, therefore, Imam(a.s.) was still not completely safe from his evil designs even upon reaching back to Madina. Once in Madina, Imam(a.s.) gathered the people and told them the horrifying stories of Karbala and informed them that his father Imam Hussain(a.s.) and his companions were martyred and his family members were made prisoners and were taken from one city to another and branded as traitors. *** …. One of the most heart breaking stories I remember every Muharam & Safar is the story of imam al Sajjad (as) when he returned to Karbala. He had to bury the corpses of his father, his brothers (including his baby brother Ali al Asghar), his uncle, his cousins, his friends and his father’s friends… all on his own. As he was gathering the body parts of his beloved father imam Al Hussain (as), he saw a finger was cut off from him. This was done so they could steal his father’s ring! How inhuman and barbaric could one be?
I remember our Imam (as) lying next to the headless body of his beloved father… hugging him and crying out to him. I remember his pain and his sorrow… Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi rajioon. I also want to add: our imam unfortunately doesn’t have a shrine… but one can always dream of one
Women's education in Hogwarts (before the first wizarding war)
This is a question that was submitted to me by someone, for the sake of convenience, I’m going to paraphrase their question(s) and assumptions to make them as short as possible:
Question: What are your thoughts on the education of women in the wizarding world?
Authorial assumption: Possibly antiquated, similar in nature to education of non-magical British women in the 1800s or so - most conservative people with the least contact with muggle world did not develop that much when women are concerned - given that the wizarding world separated from the muggle world in 1689-1693.
Assumptions that hold up the questioner’s assumed answer:
1) Law of primogeniture - male inheritance (as shown with the Black family line) indicating a certain amount of backwardness.
2) Ratio of female to male fighters among the Death Eaters versus the Order - pureblood influence versus muggle influence
3) The lower visibility of women from the older pureblood families in places of power - Narcissa Malfoy being seen only at a match, versus Lucius Malfoy being seen swanning around the Ministry.
4) The First Death Eaters being entirely male.
5) The treatment of Merope Gaunt.
I’m going to play the devil’s advocate here and first critically examine the assumptions placed here and then go on to elucidate my own thoughts on the matter. All of this goes under a cut because this is ridiculously long.
It was the priest as an idler and destroyer of the household, who gained ascendancy over women through the confessional, that the soldiers and leaders attacked more than the priest as magician or upholder of the old order. The revolutionaire was no theologian. even if he talked of superstition, and the real reason for his prejudice against the confessional was the power he felt it gave the priest over his womenfolk. Such prejudices at times came near to misogyny and there are many examples of this in the expressions of the san-culottes, the commissairs and the representants en mission. This anti-feminism was fortified by the frequently furious opposition from the village women which they encountered on their iconoclastic missions-more than one revolutionaire had to take to their legs to escape their fury. But most of all the soldiers held a grudge against women because of the way they let themselves be seduced by the lying and lazy priests. At Bec du Tarn, Huegny, a Toulouse commissaire civil ‘thundered against fanaticism, and in particular against women, who were more easily seduced by it; he said that the Revolution had been made by men, and women should not be allowed to make it backtrack…” Dartigoeyte, representant en mission in the Gers, gave vent to similar feelings in his tirade against the devotes of Mirande: “And you, you bloody bitches, you are their whores [the priests’], particularly those who attend their bloody masses and listen to their mumbo jumbo,’ but he also had a word for the “jean-foutres of husbands who are naive enough to accompany them [and who] simply show what cuckolds they are by doing so.‘
The upper-caste Hindu male world also often perceived the Dalit woman’s body as flagrantly sexual, distinct from the emerging ideology of chastity of the high caste woman. Crass representations of abundant and questionable sexuality of the Dalit female were set apart from the chaste demeanor of upper-caste female body. A large section of upper-caste men in their reformist writings identified Dalit women as shameless and prostitutes (65). In the orientalist reportage, the dependent status of unclean menial groups was defined by superior landed people in terms of the sexual availability of their womenfolk (66). Dalit women were supposed to live in temporary marriages, have questionable sexual morals, and divorce frequently.
The Dalit female body was both at the same time—repulsive and desirable, untouchable and available, reproductive and productive. Sexual exploitation of Dalit women was an everyday fact, which was often expressed in terms of the alleged “loose” character of Dalit women themselves.
The fact that most Dalit women were active in the non-segregated work force, and worked as agricultural laborers along with men, exacerbated their sexualized identity in the eyes of upper-caste publicists and reformists. Thus a tract stated: If you look at the personal life of many of these lowly and laborer women who work around our household, then you too will say along with us that 80 out of 100 of these women have extremely degenerate characters. Even the census reports state that many of these women laborers are actually prostitutes in reality. Many of the women peddlers who sell things or sit in shops proclaim their lewd behavior loudly. Only 2 out of every 1000 such women can be said to have a chaste character (68).
Fear was expressed of sexual liaisons between upper-caste men and outcaste women. Upper-caste women were asked to ensure that their men kept away from them. While criticizing men for their frivolous nature, bias against outcaste women was also evident. One stated: The licentious tendencies of men are very much visible in the public spaces—on streets, roads, narrow lanes, markets, fairs and festivals … They will not talk with their wife at home, but will laugh and talk with the outside female sweeper, who comes to clean the bathrooms or streets. They will flirt with the bangle seller and the Chamar woman on the street, completely neglecting their wife. Women need to be cautious of the dirty nature of their husbands and beware of these women (69).
CHARU GUPTA // Writing Sex and Sexuality: Archives of Colonial North India
A scene from my fanfic that I am no where near finished with, soooo… Sorry. 8D;;; Here’s the scene it is from though!
“Everyone settled in for the night? No problems? Nothing amiss?” He turned to Kili then. His brother’s features were barely discernible in the dark, but he could see the grin on Kili’s face when he turned to face him.
“Oh you know, the usual,” Kili shrugged nonchalantly, straightening back up, “-fought off a horde of orcs and a group of bandits - at the same time of course - single-handedly as well, mind you, because my brother thinks he is an elf and was busy being spirited away by the heavens.” Kili smirked and nudged his brother playfully. Fili snorted before feigning hurt.
“An elf! You are so cruel, Kili! You wound me. But orcs and bandits, all in one night-!”
“At the same time!” Kili corrected, grinning.
“Of course! At the same time! How could I have forgotten. Single-handedly. Goodness, the womenfolk must have been swooning over you, Kili. The dashing hero! Wait until Uncle hears this, he might want to rethink his choice of heir.” Fili laughed finally moving to sit up before shoving his giggling brother over in the grass. “Such tall tales. You must have dispatched them all so quickly with your very elven bow and arrow that they couldn’t even make a sound!” Now it was Kili’s turn to feign hurt, though he was struggling to keep a sober face.
“Excuse me! I handle my weapon better than any elf I’ll have you know.” Kili insisted, nodding in affirmation of his own words. “I knew it was all up to me to save the caravan, I had to work swiftly! I also had to make sure that they didn’t frighten the animals or any of the merchants, so yes, not a sound was heard! Luckily I had the exact amount of arrows needed to take them all out. Everything was handled. Not to worry, brother.” Kili finished, beaming.
“Such a grand tale. Definitely worthy of a song.” Fili snorted, rolling his eyes with a smile. “If you ever find yourself without work, storyteller may be the perfect match for you, Ki.” His brother gasped loudly, looking as though Fili had just uttered something extraordinarily revelational.
“I hadn’t thought of that! I shall definitely keep that in mind! Oh dear Fili, always having my best interests at heart!” Kili flung an arm around the blonde dwarf’s shoulders, tugging him in for a playful one-armed hug. “What would I do without my brother’s wisdom~?”
“Oh get off, you great idiot.” Fili laughed but made no effort to fend off his younger sibling, instead he leaned in to rest his head against his brother’s. “What am I going to do with you?” He wondered aloud, smiling and slipping his own arm around the dark-haired dwarf to gently ruffle his sibling’s hair before settling his hand on Kili’s shoulder to return the light embrace. Kili made a thoughtful noise.
“Not much can be done with an idiot brother - keeping him out of trouble or joining him in it seem to be your only options.” Kili said rather matter-of-fact before another grin spread across his lips and lightly nuzzling his sibling earning a chuckle from Fili.
“And here I thought ‘future king’ was the most trying thing to be thrust upon me. Little did I know…” Fili heaved a great woeful sigh before dissolving into giggles right along with his brother.
He Who Lacks Ghayrah (Protective Jealousy) Is NOT A Man
قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم : ثلاثة قد حرم الله تبارك وتعالى عليهم الجنة : مدمن الخمر ، والعاق ، والديوث الذي يقر في أهله الخبث.
The Messenger of Allāh ﷺ said: “There are three upon whom Allāh Tabārak Wa Ta'ālā has made Paradise Ḥarām (forbidden):
• The one addicted to intoxicants
• The one who is disobedient (to his parents)
• And the Dayyooth (shameless one) who approves lewd/evil acts of his womenfolk.”
● [رواه النسائي في السنن ٦١١٣]
Ibn al-Qayyim Raḥimahullāh said: “And that is because Ghayrah (protective jealousy) is from the basis of this religion so whoever lacks it then he lacks Deen, hence to Allāh a Dayyooth is the most vile creature and Jannah is Ḥarām upon him.” ● [الجواب الكافي]
al-Lajnah ad-Dā'imah (scholarly committee for research and Iftā) was asked if the label ‘Dayyooth’ applies to a man who allows his womenfolk to uncover themselves and wear unislamic attire or is it only applied to the one approves of acts of Zinā by his womenfolk??
They said: “So when one looks at these narrations then he understands that the label 'Dayyooth’ is applied to EVERYONE who APPROVES EVIL of those who are under his guardianship (Wilāyah), be it his wife or daughter or his sister, all of it is same whether he approves them committing Zinā or whether he approves them engaging in THE SOURCES THAT LEAD TO ZINĀ, like his woman (wife, sister or daughter) uncovering herself in front of an unrelated man or being alone with him or going out of her home with him…”