SUPER old Spongebob references from the development days of The Harvester back in fall of 2015!
Starring super-dead Hema impersonating Yellow Old-really-obviously-evil Topaz back when her original concept was a one-dimensional, flat villain that wanted to take over the Yellow District for no reason [also when her design completely hid her eyes] and the face of regret
Not a few chapters ago, during the Rueshima arc, Amon hold to the black and white mentality in a way that indicated no deep change whatsoever. What he told Saiko was more used as a coping mechanism for himself than for her sake I would argue. I would even say that his mentality, even after the ghoulification process, hurt Amon the most because he actually expanded on that ideology and didn’t twist or even abandon it. The only redeeamble aspect he saw, the only way to escape his guilt and shame and inner conflict, was to fight with investigators, and yes, even after he was a ghoul, even though indirectly. The protection of Saiko, the protection of Akira, even the protection of Seidou to some extent… even if they are tied somehow to his past, they are or were the utmost embodiment of mankind and humanity, a reflection he chased after for so long, and that was what he wanted to protect, even in his last moments before he lost conscioussness.
Then he was captured by Urie’s squad for good and brought back to the CCG. It was an important step for him because this reconciliation and indirect confrontation with his past, served as a turning point to his already broken mind. The fact that he was unconsciouss was possibly a symbolic way to imply that he didn’t manage to reconcile with his idea of his past self and the CCG, his second home so to speak, anymore. The outrage and lack of control might have implied his final breakdown with all the confusion, denial and struggle along with it and the source of stability has never been a stable source in the first place. You see, anon, the surpressor drugs and the brainwashing of the CCG are the same difference. I think the turning point in this arc, even if symbolically speaking, was that the treatment and the experiences he suffered in the CCG before his ghoulification and after his ghoulification were both breaking him to the very core. Not only him, mind you. And that’s why I actually like this line of his so much.
Because, instead of shame and guilt and possibily denial, he acknowledges his situation as for what it is and most importantly, he acknowledges his feelings. I feel like Amon has been running away from his emotions for quite some time and dealt with it in the pretense of acting according to his ideal role. But now he admits (not only to Touka, but also to himself) these feelings he had and instead of discarding them right away, he allows himself to feel, to acknowledge, to accept and to self-reflect. And I feel like “the world” is definitely a reference to the CCG, even if Aogiri and V play a part as well. It’s acknowledging what the CCG has done to him, too. I am not glorifying this statement of his because I know that there are just as many things wrong with it, but for now I will focus on the postive aspects of it.
That’s why I am looking foward to Amon’s development, actually. I am content that it might happen and I am sure what you and I experienced was the beginning of said development. I think it’s actually better for Amon’s characterisation to do his development slowly and steadily, because it resonates with the reader much more.
And yes, I am looking foward to Donato’s confrontation with Amon, too. It’s a chapter in his life that is unresolved and, unlike Kaneki, Amon has an opportunity to resolve it possibly with his living parent, even though the outcome of it is a whole another matter. I don’t want to go too deep into it for now because I honestly didn’t grapple myself with it and I feel like that I might state things that simply don’t hold true, but I will tag a few people that I might take interest in that topic of yours and write something about it. @curiositykilledthefaux, @trulyhumblenarcissist, @amon15, @thestralseer
In regards to Kaneki, I think I agree with trulyhumblenarcisst’s statement: “Especially for kaneki, he makes a fundamental step, but then he tends to go back and forth, lost in his different identities”
I do think that Kaneki made a few times the right first step, but ultimately drifts away again, either in his many identities or his fears and insecurities. Possibly both. For example, I was pretty happy that Kaneki finally “chose to live”, also hoping that he would abandon his martyr complex for good, but looking at the new arcs, this notion actually didn’t change. He still has a martyr complex in the pretense of… there isn’t actually one. Eto and Arima pushed him in that direction and Kaneki “chose" to comply. Those rebirths, the ones we witnessed through the entire series, they have been a doom loop all along, no matter how beautiful and heart-wrenching they may have been. Because they fall back to one starting point again: his insecurities. I am not denying here that Kaneki did made a few positive changes, I am not saying Kaneki is an immature character because that would simplify the complexity of his issues, even though I can’t talk about it all day either, but Kaneki, in my opinion at least, doesn’t manage to put behind his old thought patterns. I think Roma puts in an interesting way, maybe it served even as a foreshadowing to Kaneki’s future narrative.
Kaneki is the very reflection of that “white, beautiful Kaneki” Roma laments so much. The “spilled wine” metaphor might be a reference to just that. It’s like Kaneki is picking up the remants of his various personas, but instead of reflecting on these and recognizing it as broken and unusable, he choses to hold these shards tightly, hurting himself in the process and walks away. He is not rebuilding them either, but he doesn’t try to abandon them for good and is not letting them go. These are remants of his memories, ideologies and personas he embodied, aspects that made him connected to reality and also caged him, but connected doesn’t mean “being part” of it, which is also a point I am mentioning. Kaneki, to the core, is utterly drained out and moving foward is definitely dependant on mental stability, place and time, factors doesn’t want to acknowledge. Kaneki instead chooses to walk, carefully not trying to rattle his inner mind. And the reason why he doesn’t want to cope? Maybe because it’s better to stick to something which you are used instead of transitioning onto a new, albeit unpredictable path. He seeks a strange comfort in his despair because it’s narrative he is accustomed to the most, although the desire of freedom of these weaknessess in form of shackless lingers through. But those two are extreme emotions, not only serving as a contrast, but also factors that put him in this situation in the first place. Kaneki refuses to take the middle path, of accepting said weaknesses and flaws and trying to build his strenght on that foundation, but instead tries to discard them entirely, which is utterly impossible.
I might sound like a nutcase, but I kinda get Roma’s fascination with Kaneki. He is an anti-hero through and through and I want him to fail, reveling in his own despair he himself refused to detach himself from. Not only with Kaneki, but also with Furuta.
Both embrace but also fear their despair and cling to obessisons, said spirals in the cover, a mesmerizing power that is consuming them and breaking them apart and it also shows. Both of them have heavy eye bags, both look physically, pale, weakened and tired. And both hide this inner instability and inner conflict, that symbocially grotesque and raw force, even though it lingers from time to time and even manages to find its way out. Furuta’s exaggerated expressions, madness mantra and lack of control of body autonomy are a symptom of just that. Just as Kaneki’s violent outbreaks, before returning to his old persona are a reflection of said instablity. Kaneki and Furuta are toys. Some would say to a higher mastermind, which is also an interesting factor, but to me they are a toys to their own weakness. And that’s why I think that this cover tries to hint that they walk the same path, actually.