the weeders

Some Roman agriculture deities

Rusina is a goddess of the fields (from Latin rus, ruris; cf. English “rural” and “rustic”).

Rusor is invoked with Altor by the pontiffs in a sacrifice to the earth deities Tellus and Tellumo. In interpreting the god’s function, Varro derives Rusor from rursus, “again,” because of the cyclical nature of agriculture. Altor is an agent god from the verb alo, alere, altus, “to grow, nurture, nourish”. According to Varro, he received res divina because “all things which are born are nourished from the earth”.

Sator, the “sower” god.

Seia, goddess who protects the seed once sown in the earth; also as Fructesea, compounded with fructus, “produce, fruit”

Segesta, goddess who promotes the growth of the seedling.

Hostilina, goddess who makes grain grow evenly.

Lactans or Lacturnus, god who infuses crops with “milk” (sap or juice).

Volutina, goddess who induces “envelopes” (involumenta) or leaf sheaths to form.

Nodutus, god who causes the “knot” (nodus) or node to form.

Patelana, goddess who opens up (pateo, patere) the grain, possibly in reference to the emergence of the flag leaf.

Runcina, the weeder goddess, or a goddess of mowing.

Messia, the female equivalent of Messor the reaper, and associated with Tutelina.

Noduterensis or Terensis, the god of threshing.

Tutelina, a goddess who watches over the stored grain.

Sterquilinus, who manures the fields.


[clears throat]

A rise in mercury sometimes mars life on earth, how else would nature planet?

Does Neil Armstrong ever space out?

He knew everything about constellations, some might say his knowledge of the night sky was astronomical.

How do spacemen add more protein to their diet? They make it meteor.

How do you organize a space party? You planet.

How does a man on the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.

How does the earth get clean? It takes a meteor shower!

I thought about studying astronomy for university but I knew I would just be taking up space.

Mooning is lunacy.

Those who study the moon are optimists. They look at the bright side.

Two ladies were discussing the planetarium show they had just seen. One said the show was fantastic. The other agreed but added ‘Most of it was over my head.

Why does a moon-rock taste better than an earth-rock? Because it’s a little meteor!

What is an astronaut’s favorite place on a computer? The space bar. 

Where would an astronaut park his space ship? A parking meteor! 

At what time do astronauts eat? At launch time. 

What did the alien say to the cat? Take me to your litter. 

What do aliens on the metric system say? Take me to your liter.

What did the alien say to the garden? Take me to your weeder!

What do you call a fruit that goes into space? A coco-naut.

What do you call a tick on the moon? A luna-tick. 

What did the librarian say to the astronaut? Find space for a book. 

How do you know when the moon has enough to eat? When it’s full. 

How do you get a baby astronaut to sleep? You rocket. 

How do astronauts eat their ice creams? In floats! 

Why don’t people like the restaurant on the moon? Because there was no atmosphere. 

What do Astronauts eat on? Flying Saucers! 

 Where do astronauts grab a drink? At the spacebar! 

What do you call a space explorer that talks smack? A sass-tronaut! 

Why is Saturn so rich? Because it has lots of rings! 

What does an astronaut eat for breakfast? Nothing, he went out for launch. 

How do you know when the moon is going broke? When it’s down to its last quarter. 

How does one astronaut on the moon tell another astronaut that he is sorry? He Apollo-gises. 

Oooh I have a space pun but I need a little longer to planet.

I’d tell you a joke about space, but… its too, out of this world! 

Why did the sun go to school? To get brighter!

What kind of music do planets sing? Neptunes!

What do planets like to read? Comet books!

Why don’t aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny!

gweeder: Left the video shoot to bring my young nigga @kendricklamar to my boy #ClevelandPalmer art gallery!He’s the art director at Compton College and students who r frm Compton paint amazing oil paintings he told me thy was painting 1 of Kendrick and I told him I was gone bring him up there!💯

Instructor’s Dilemma

The AU fanfic that nobody asked for!

Synopsis: Angela is a freshly hired professor, Fareeha happens to be taking her class

The title is staying until I think of literally anything else. 

Students started to flow into the classroom, the murmuring echoing through the lecture hall. Angela could pick up some parts of the conversation from the unsuspecting students, venting their frustrations at how much in textbooks they had to pay, and how they already had homework assigned on the first day of classes. Angela didn’t register much, however, she was focused on making sure she got her first lecture right the first time around.

Headmaster Ana Amari had been very generous in giving her an opportunity to lecture at Overwatch University. She was very young compared to all the other professors, but Ana had seen her aptitude for instructing. Angela had managed to serve as a Teacher’s Assistant while simultaneously getting a double major in Education and Pre-Med. Ana had agreed to allow Angela to give lectures at the university, in return Angela would be receiving free tuition as she studied to receive her doctorate. There was no doubt she would be swamped with a massive workload, but Angela took pressure like that in stride.  

The stream of students began to slow down from the initial burst into the lecture hall. Thankfully, most students appeared to have arrived a good deal earlier than usual for their first day of the lecture. The room was beginning to fill up to capacity, students no longer able to avoid sitting down with a buffer seat on either side. Being a core common science course meant that it was a class required for a plethora of majors and academic pathways. Angela had no doubt that this room full to the brim would be at half capacity within a month. These types of weeder classes tended to have a high dropout rate and a fairly low attendance rate.

The murmur of the crowd was low and anticipatory. Angela looked to the doors to see a few stragglers coming in before the clock struck 2:00. The last person to enter in through the doorway gave Angela a little leap to her stomach. She wasn’t really just a person, Angela thought to herself. She was a woman.

Indeed she was, with a muscular frame, sturdy shoulders, and shining, smooth black hair, she seemed to be just Angela’s type. Plus, that smooth mocha skin made her seem so exotic. Angela cursed herself when she realized she was already becoming attracted to a student and she hadn’t even began to give her first lecture yet. It was not until the stranger turned her head to face Angela did she realize how much trouble she was in.


Oh no.

Fareeha Amari, spitting image of Headmaster Amari, donning the same tattoo on the opposite eye, strolled into class with the confidence (or cockiness) that Angela could definitely tell she got from her mother. Fareeha locked eyes with the suddenly flustered professor. She gave a quick glance up and down and then settled back onto Angela’s face, giving her a head nod and a small smirk as she moved to the steps to take her seat. She sat herself right in the middle of the second row, just about eye level with the professor.

The digital clock next to the projector changed to mark the start of a new hour, and Angela faced the class with a mix of anxiety and excitement.

“Welcome everyone. I do hope you all are here for Chemistry 123, otherwise known as Organic Chemistry, otherwise known as the reason you’ll be able to put down the library as your second place of residence. She turned to grab a dry-erase marker from the tray and began to write on the board. “My office hours are Tuesday and Thursday mornings at 10:00 am to 11:00 am, and here is my email in case you want to reach me in any way during the semester”, she turned to face the class again and her eyes shifted to Fareeha (this will be a bad habit), who seemed to be very interested in the last bit of information shared to the class.

The rest of her lecture went without a hitch. She was able to cruise through the boring syllabus content and dive straight into the exciting world of OChem, or at least that’s what she thought.

As soon as the lecture end time was reached, Angela concluded her final thoughts before sending the students off. Streams of people cruised down the aisle, trying to get out the doors before there was an inevitable blockup from people also trying to get inside the same lecture hall. Angela was packing up her laptop into her small backpack when she saw someone approaching her out of the corner of her eye.

“Excuse me? Professor?”

Angela turned to the student approaching her and she immediately began to straighten her back. “Ah, yes, what can I do for you…?”

Fareeha gave the first instance of hesitation Angela could see, her mouth slightly opened trying to get started asking something that was clearly bothering her.

“So.. last semester I had taken this class, but I sort-of dropped out halfway through. It’s a required class for my major, so I gotta take it again, but I’m extremely worried I’m not going to get through it, like last semester.” She started shifting her feet over one another, “And, I was wondering –”

“If you could get a little extra help?” Angela cut her off before she even needed to ask. “Ja, I can definitely help you if you ever have trouble understanding a concept or problem”, Angela gave a reassuring smile, “And it’s nothing to be ashamed about, organic chemistry is an extremely difficult class, but the fact that you already want to improve is a good sign”, Fareeha was looking at her feet, cheeks slightly flushed, but the anxious face was no longer present. “It might get a little tight, but I think I can squeeze you in the hour leading up to my office hours, just email me before hand if you are thinking of stopping by.”

Fareeha quickly looked up excitedly and could hardly fight down the smile growing on her face.

“Wow, you don’t know how much that would mean to me. Thank you so much!” Fareeha felt the sudden urge to hug the woman in front of her, but she decided it would be best not to. “I’m Fareeha by the way… but I’m pretty sure you already knew that”, she smirked as she lightly tapped the tattoo etched onto her eye. Angela gave her a “guilty as charged” look and shrugged her shoulders. “I will definitely take use of your offer. Thank you again, Professor Ziegler.”

“Oh please, Fareeha. I don’t want to feel like I’m 50 with tenure just yet. You can just call me Angela. I mean, I’m only 25. Though you know, I could probably find a smoking pipe and an elbow-patched suit jacket and wear that to class from now on.”

They both giggled, but were distracted by new students flowing in and entering the classroom.

“I guess we gotta get out of here”

Fareeha cocked an eyebrow, before replying “Yeah, I gotta head to my Differential Equations class, I have no idea why I picked that class section when it’s 10 minutes after this one.” She turned to leave, before stopping and facing Angela one last time, “I really appreciate it, Angela, see you around.”

Angela found it very hard not to stare at the Egyptian’s tail end as she sauntered towards and out the door. She wondered whether she accepted Fareeha’s request as a way of repaying her mother, or the fact that Angela found the younger student incredibly gorgeous.

What have I gotten myself into.