the way home!


hello it’s been really bad weather the last couple of days it’s snowing a whole lot and it’s windy so the snow goes up in the air like a thick fog and i dont understand how people are able to drive (also yesterday i saw a car that had driven off the road a bit past my house) but im currently in a car on my way home from school just letting you know in case i die

Better Off As Lovers, and Not The Other Way Around

look! it’s the fake relationship au i wrote instead of working on my chaptered fic!

Dan and Phil have a system of pretending to be in a relationship to get them out of awkward situations, but Dan takes it too far the day he signs Phil up as his plus one for his five year school reunion. Dan didn’t even want to go, but his ex-girlfriend is going to be there so it’s too late to back out now. ~aka the fake relationship au that no one asked for~ ao3 link x

words: 7k

tags: fake relationship, fluff, angst with a happy ending

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The Afterlife Fic (The Best I Ever Had in My Entire Life... Or Death) - LovingCup - One Direction (Band) [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
By Organization for Transformative Works

My sister just got pulled over literally 3 houses down on her way home because her muffler was too loud!!!!!! I didn’t know they could do that. Not everyone has money to get working cars fixed just because they’re loud. I know mufflers are important but jeez. Good thing they didn’t hear my alternator. He didn’t give her a ticket, he just said, “Allrighty miss, just get that looked at. Have a good night.” or something like that. As if driving a loud car making scary noises isn’t stressful enough, now we gotta be on the lookout for cops trying to pull us over to remind us how poor we are lmfao :) :)

anonymous asked:

OK here we go -in defense of Legwork!Mycroft As many have said, there's no way Mycroft could've pulled off the Serbia rescue if he had no fieldwork experience. But I don't see that that is necessarily at odds with Mycroft in TFP. My take is that Mycroft was trained and worked in the field but his fieldwork career ended disastrously with a mission gone wrong. Sort of AGRA style gone wrong with a captured Mycroft and dead partners. The kind of thing that maybe still wakes him up at night. (cont)

(cont) When he went in to get Sherlock he was on specific mission and knew what he would be facing. He was able to stay completely focused but who knows what happened afterwords when he didn’t have to have his game face on? For all we know he was shivering and dry heaving in the airplane toilet on the way home. In TFP he was completely powerless. Like Sherlock said -it was vivisection and for Mycroft there was also the crushing guilt. (cont)

(cont) You put him in a situation like that and it’s going to be very hard for him to keep his game face on. Then a person he has worked with for many years suddenly blows his brains out -literally - right in front of him. It’s no wonder that he decompensated. Anyway, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Long live Legwork!Mycroft

This is pretty much how I’ve made everything fit in my head too tbh! 

anonymous asked:

Dude... I just finished watching a dating show and the woman had to compass tattoos. The guy she was dating said, "Oh, so you can always find your way home?" And like... I can't escape.

they’re h/l in disguise don’t be fooled


Morning and afternoon study sessions 📚

My chemistry lab didn’t take long so I had time to do two bio assignments and bio readings for next week. After my bio lecture, I studied psychology and met with an advisor for a meeting. On the way home I finished a rough draft of a bio lab assignment and I’m having a physics study sesh with a friend tonight!

Not Dead Yet (Part 20)

*What am I even doing that I have this much free time? Even then I’m not sure it’s enough.*

Pairing: Reader x Peter Pan

Warning: mild language

A few more days went by of Peter and I trapped in the Enchanted Forest. We made the best of it. Had some laughs, only tried to kill each other a handful of times, terrorized a town or two, basic things you do when you’re trying to find a magic bean or realm jumper. You would think for a land filled with magic there would be some more of these things!

“Y/N!” Peter burst into the inn room we had rented.

“What do you look so giddy about?” I set the book I was reading down. “Did you find a way back home?”

“No, but I do have a pretty nice surprise waiting outside.”

I followed him out of the room with a shrug. He pulled me along to the side of the inn to the stables. “Say hello to our recently commandeered horses.”


“Something wrong? I would have thought you’d be happy. When we leave this village we can ride them instead of walking. We’ll get around faster and our feet won’t hurt so much.”

“I know, it’s smart and all it’s just, I’ve never ridden a horse before.” I pet the muzzle of the black and white horse next to me.

“It’s not hard.” he opened the stall and saddled the horse up with ease before leading it out. “Put your one foot in the stirrup there, pull yourself up, swing your leg across and adjust yourself accordingly from there.”

“You seem to know a lot. Drawing, horse riding, just full of surprises recently aren’t ya?”

“Something you seem to forget is that I am indeed a lot older than I look. Is it such a surprise I do know such skills?”

“How old are you exactly?”

He shrugged. “Lost count a couple decades ago.”

“Give me a reasonable guess.”

“I don’t know, maybe three hundred.”

“Three hundred!”

“Look good don’t I?”

“Three hundred years old and you still act like a teenage prat.” I put my foot in the stirrup and tried in vain to pull myself up. This was trickier than I thought.

“Here,” Peter knelt down indicating for me to use his knee as a step, “It’s not like age really affects me. I’ve just always been young, I’ve never had any conventional responsibilities or jobs. The years just go by in a blur and I’m stuck just the same as I was a decade ago. You should know, how old are you now?”

“I’m uh…” I did some quick calculations in my head, “Oh wow, I should be nearing my thirties shouldn’t I?”

“And do you feel any more mature or sagely from when you first came to Neverland?”

“I suppose not.”

“Exactly. That’s my entire life. Just years of the same youthful bliss.” he sighed content.

I was now upright in the saddle a little apprehensive about what to do now. “Don’t look so lost.” Peter had saddled up the other horse, “Let’s get you used to it.” He took the reins from me and led the horses, with me on one, out of the stables.

We walked back out to this dale a little ways from the village. After I had gotten used to being in the saddle Peter got on his and we trotted along the open valley. On a horse Peter was even more in his element. Just that smiling expression as he raced through across the landscape made wanting to return to Neverland harder.

“Y’know,” I pulled up alongside him, “I’m gonna miss doing stuff like this when we get back home.”

“Me too. I haven’t felt this free in a long time.”

“How’s that?”

“Wind in my hair, ground rushing under me, speeding toward that horizon wondering if I’ll ever reach the crest…it’s a feeling you can’t recreate. You’re just racing along and you feel like…like…”

“Like you’re flying.” I finished. “Something tells me you used to fly a lot when you were younger.”

“Oh you couldn’t keep me on the ground.” he laughed. “But that was a long time ago…” his face darkened, “There’s barely any pixie dust left, I have to use it sparingly nowadays.”

Our good time was quickly turning south. “Hey, race you to the village?”

He gave me a half-hearted smirk, “You know you stand no chance.”

“Which is why you can’t resist.” I reaffirmed my grip in the reins, “So?”

He let out a small snort. “I’ll even give you a five second head-start.”

“H’yah!” I kicked the horse’s flank and we took off across the dale. Even with my head start Peter overtook me with ease. When we got back to the village we settled back in the inn for some dinner and plans to leave for the next town in the morning.

This time the room we shared had two beds so we didn’t need to cram into one like before which was a relief. Whilst trying to fall asleep I kept thinking back to earlier when Peter and I were riding horses. I meant it when I said I was going to miss doing stuff like that. There was much to be had on Neverland with the all the boys but there were little adventures like this you couldn’t recreate in a jungle, even if it was the land of make believe.

Perhaps when we got back home and things returned to normal I could convince Peter to take some time away from Neverland. We could go riding again. Do the things we couldn’t do on Neverland. In the morning Peter and I left the village on our borrowed horses. According to the villagers the next town was almost half a day’s ride from here, two days on foot. Joy.

We were passing the time in any way we can. At first we had tried playing ‘I spy’ but that died as soon as it started. Now we were asking ‘would you rather’ questions. Started out simple enough then things got weird.

“Okay, I got one.” I thought of a new one, “Would you rather be constantly itchy or constantly sticky?”


“Yeah, I get that. Your turn.”

“Would you rather have sex with someone sickeningly ugly or a beautiful, fresh corpse?”


“Answer the question!”

“Hm? So basically would I rather have sex with a corpse or you?” I joked and he let out a short laugh. “In all honesty I would rather have sex with a living person. Necrophilia is a taboo that shall remain just that.”

“I’m flattered.”

“Why are you flattered?”

“You said me or a corpse–”

“Shut up.” I smirked back at him. As I was thinking of what to ask for my turn a question came to my mind that made me laugh.

“What? The thought of sleeping with me really that amusing?”

“No, well yes, but that’s not what I was laughing at. I was going to ask would you rather know when you’re going to die or meet it blissfully unaware.”

“Ass.” he muttered. “What about you? Would you want to know when you’re going to die?”

I shook my head. “I’ve had too many near death experiences. When I die I would rather go into it without knowing it was the end.”

“If you die.” Peter said.

“I’m not immortal. I am gonna die one day.”

“Not yet though.” we continued riding down the trail when someone ran out in front of us.

“Whoa!” I pulled back on the reins so I didn’t trample the idiot. “Watch it! Trying to get yourself killed?”

“Shut your trap you–” the boy stopped and my jaw dropped. “Y/N?”

“Devin!” I dismounted my horse and ran up to hug him. “Oh my god, how are you here? Why are you here? I’m so happy to see you!”

“Well when you and Pan disappeared everyone started getting antsy. Couple days passed by and we decided to go looking for you.” Devin answered. By this time Peter had dismounted too and was standing next to me listening to Devin. “Sorry to say but we had to have Felix loot the magic beans so we could head out. We’ve been to as many realms as we could think of for three days looking for you guys.”

“Does that mean you have a bean to get us home?” Peter asked.

“Of course.” Devin handed him the sack at his belt. Inside was a pile of sparkling beans.

“You did well.” Peter patted his shoulder. “Now how about we go home?”

“What about the horses?” I looked back at them.

“This is a well traveled trail, someone will find them. Do you really want to waste another moment here?”

“No. Let’s go home.” When Peter dropped the bean on the ground I felt bittersweet about our return. I was overjoyed to see Devin and glad to have a way back home but just one more day riding horses and stealing food from the town vendors would have been nice.

The portal opened up and the three of us stepped through finally on our way back home. The swirling tunnel we fell through ended and we were back in the familiar humidity of the jungle. I hadn’t realized how bundled up I was and shrugged off the cloak I was wearing. Peter immediately called his shadow and sent it off to find the Lost Boys in the other realms and order them back. In the meantime Devin and I rushed back to camp. The boys left behind were glad to see we were safe and sound.

I saw Felix on the sidelines and the look he sent me was chilling. Last time I saw him he had left me at the top of a cliff to await my inevitable death. Now I was waltzing back into camp alive as ever with his leader and best friend at my hip. I think it hit me then exactly how much had changed in the short time Peter and I were gone.

To the boys it was just a week without either of us. Nothing had changed for them. They had no idea about anything. No one knew that Peter was dying. That our entire life on this island was as limited as his. No one knew Peter’s past, how he ended up here. I don’t even think Felix knows the whole truth or if he knows that Peter is dying. Knowing Peter he probably wouldn’t have mentioned this to anyone, not even Felix. I am now the one who knows Peter Pan the most. That was a scary, yet elating, thought.

One by one the missing Lost Boys returned and a celebration began in honor of our safe return. I cut at the dress I was wearing so my legs were free to move without being cumbersome. Many of the boys came up asking for what happened and where we had gone. I gave a slightly altered version of Peter and I’s misadventures back in the Enchanted Forest. Mainly that we had accidentally dropped a bean and fallen through the portal to the Enchanted Forest. With no way back we wandered around the land looking for someone home when Devin stumbled across us. Peter made no move to correct me during the telling. It was better the boys think us getting stuck in the other realm was an accident and not me trying to run away and Peter following after me.

Speaking of which. I looked across the camp where Peter stood with Felix. What looked like a spirited conversation was quickly turning into a heated argument. Felix pointed an accusing finger in my direction and made eye contact with me. Peter smacked his arm down and was stressing through clenched teeth in an effort to stay calm.

Felix stormed off into the jungle. Peter looked back at me before leaving in the other direction.

“Y/N? Y/N!” Ben was trying to get my attention. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine.” I assured him, “I need to take care of something, be right back.”

I rushed out into the jungle. When I didn’t catch up with Peter immediately I knew there was one place he had to have gone. Following the faint melody dancing through the trees I found Peter’s Thinking Tree. I climbed up until I could see Peter sitting in the boughs.

“Haven’t we spent enough time together?” he snarled down at me.

“I saw things with Felix. What’d you tell him?”

“The truth, what else? Can’t exactly lie to him like the others.” I pulled myself up so I was sitting on the same branch as him. He didn’t look my way but I could see the distaste.

“He’s pissed I’m back, isn’t he?”

“Felix is my most trusted friend, loyal to a tee. Then you come along and break the one rule we have and upset the balance of the island. Of course he’s pissed.” he twisted his dagger round in his hand. “Trying to explain why I brought you back without actually divulging anything that happened is frustrating to say the least.”

I swung my feet aimlessly back and forth the question I was scared to ask resting on my tongue. “Are you wishing you left me back in the other realm yet?”

“Not yet.”

I sighed and started to climb back down. I made it more than half way before Peter called after me. “Wait.” he jumped down to my level, apprehension in his eyes. “Remember what we agreed?”

“What happens in the forest stays in the forest. I know.” I nodded.

“That means everything.”

“I understand.” He continued to stare at me until it got uncomfortable. “Was there something else you wanted to tell me or do you just delight in my unease?”

“Why yes I do. Your anguish sustains me.” he gave me crooked grin, “Which is why back in the forest I lied to you. I just wanted to see you get angry. Helps pass the boredom.”

“What’d you lie to me about?” I swear if turned out everything he had told me that first night was a lie I was going to slit his neck here and now and not give one damn if I died with him and the island.

“Fish head.” The silence pervading between us grew stagnant. Just when I thought he wouldn’t say anything he had to speak the two words that would have meant nothing to anyone else.

“I guess that makes us both liars.” I mumbled back.

His eyes widened and I swallowed my tongue. Without another word I maneuvered back down the tree stumbling a bit in my haste. When I reached the ground I took off back for camp the wind the only thing keeping my burning face cool. I didn’t think I’d miss the Enchanted Forest already.

(Part 1) (Previous)

jinxiebat  asked:

Just had to say I adore your Russian folk lore au! I'm wondering if Kylo can take the form of a bird like some do in the Koschei tales? If so, what kind?

The blacksmith swears up and down that he saw Kylo turn into a crow one evening, on the Monday after Maslenitsa week. One moment, he’d been standing there in the snow, long braids and tattered hood, hands raised, frigid wind fluttering up the edges of his cloak like wings. Then, suddenly, the shape of the man, gone, the bird cocking its head then springing up into the air. 

Of course, it was the Monday after Maslenitsa week, “Clean Monday”, and the blacksmith was on his way home from the banya, where he had been dutifully scourging himself with a birch broom, and generously rinsing his mouth with vodka, per tradition. So who can say for certain?

At the very least, Kylo likes crows. He feeds them, especially in winter. Hangs up meat scraps and scatters pine nuts and berries, moves some of the acceptable offerings set out by the villagers closer to the large dying oak near his hut. 

Oh, and let me ramble a second about how confused I was by American crows when I first saw them. You know, all iridescent black and glossy and sleek. Eastern European crows are not so!  

The crows the blacksmith has in mind are these guys:

Look at that curious head tilt. Grey (Hooded) crows are a bit thicker than American crows, and their bills are longer. And they walk with this sort of deliberate heavy gait.

Obligatory Kylo head tilt, for comparison purposes: 

Terrible Tale To Tell You All

Last Night I Went To Sleep In My Bed. My Sweet Sweet Bed A Hundred And Fifty Feet Wide (To Fit Myself And My 57 Wives Comfortably.) But When I Awoke I Was Strapped To A Slab Of Metal And A Man In A Doctor Suit Was Standing Over Me And I Said To Him. “Doctor Doctor What Have You Done To Me” And He Jast Flashed Me A Devilish Grin And Said To Me “Just Look Down” And When I Looked I Saw To My Horror That He Had Grafted A Grotesque Image To My Skin…..

Now I Broke Free Because I Wasn’t Really Secured All That Well And Ran And Flew All The Way Back To My Home And Im Scribing This Down Now So I Am Fine.

The Image?

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