the way before you has been prepared

  • thorin: he looks more like a grocer than a burglar
  • bilbo: What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in conkers, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on the Sackville-Baggins. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across Middle-Earth and your sorry ass is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Shire Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
6

“I understand. I suppose you have no choice but to revolutionize the world.

The way before you has been prepared.”    
    

👏WHAT👏THE👏FUCK👏DID👏YOU👏JUST👏FUCKING👏SAY👏ABOUT👏ME👏YOU👏LITTLE 👏BITCH?👏I’LL👏HAVE👏YOU👏KNOW👏I👏GRADUATED 👏TOP 👏OF 👏MY 👏CLASS 👏IN 👏THE 👏NAVY 👏SEALS👏AND 👏I’VE 👏BEEN 👏INVOLVED 👏IN 👏NUMEROUS 👏SECRET 👏RAIDS 👏ON 👏AL-QUAEDA, 👏AND 👏I 👏HAVE 👏OVER 👏300 👏CONFIRMED 👏KILLS. 👏I 👏AM 👏TRAINED 👏IN 👏GORILLA 👏WARFARE 👏AND 👏I’M 👏THE 👏TOP 👏SNIPER 👏IN 👏THE 👏ENTIRE 👏US 👏ARMED 👏FORCES. 👏YOU 👏ARE 👏NOTHING 👏TO 👏ME 👏BUT 👏JUST 👏ANOTHER 👏TARGET. 👏I 👏WILL 👏WIPE 👏YOU 👏THE 👏FUCK 👏OUT 👏WITH 👏PRECISION 👏THE 👏LIKES 👏OF 👏WHICH 👏HAS 👏NEVER 👏BEEN 👏SEEN 👏BEFORE 👏ON 👏THIS 👏EARTH, 👏MARK 👏MY 👏FUCKING 👏WORDS. 👏YOU 👏THINK 👏YOU 👏CAN 👏GET 👏AWAY 👏WITH 👏SAYING 👏THAT 👏SHIT 👏TO 👏ME 👏OVER 👏THE 👏INTERNET? 👏THINK 👏AGAIN, 👏FUCKER. 👏AS 👏WE 👏SPEAK 👏I 👏AM 👏CONTACTING 👏MY 👏SECRET 👏NETWORK 👏OF 👏SPIES 👏ACROSS 👏THE 👏USA 👏AND 👏YOUR 👏IP 👏IS 👏BEING 👏TRACED 👏RIGHT 👏NOW 👏SO 👏YOU 👏BETTER 👏PREPARE 👏FOR 👏THE 👏STORM, 👏MAGGOT. 👏THE 👏STORM 👏THAT 👏WIPES 👏OUT 👏THE 👏PATHETIC 👏LITTLE 👏THING 👏YOU 👏CALL 👏YOUR 👏LIFE. 👏YOU’RE👏 FUCKING 👏DEAD, 👏KID. 👏I 👏CAN 👏BE 👏ANYWHERE, 👏ANYTIME, 👏AND 👏I 👏CAN 👏KILL 👏YOU 👏IN 👏OVER 👏SEVEN 👏HUNDRED 👏WAYS, 👏AND 👏THAT’S 👏JUST 👏WITH 👏MY 👏BARE 👏HANDS. 👏NOT 👏ONLY 👏AM 👏I 👏EXTENSIVELY 👏TRAINED 👏IN 👏UNARMED 👏COMBAT, 👏BUT 👏I 👏HAVE 👏ACCESS 👏TO 👏THE 👏ENTIRE 👏ARSENAL 👏OF 👏THE 👏UNITED 👏STATES 👏MARINE 👏CORPS 👏AND 👏I 👏WILL 👏USE 👏IT 👏TO 👏ITS 👏FULL 👏EXTENT 👏TO 👏WIPE 👏YOUR 👏MISERABLE 👏ASS 👏OFF 👏THE 👏FACE 👏OF 👏THE 👏CONTINENT, 👏YOU 👏LITTLE 👏SHIT. 👏IF 👏ONLY 👏YOU 👏COULD 👏HAVE 👏KNOWN 👏WHAT 👏UNHOLY 👏RETRIBUTION 👏YOUR 👏LITTLE 👏“CLEVER” 👏COMMENT 👏WAS 👏ABOUT 👏TO 👏BRING 👏DOWN 👏UPON 👏YOU, 👏MAYBE 👏YOU 👏WOULD 👏HAVE 👏HELD 👏YOUR 👏FUCKING 👏TONGUE. 👏BUT 👏YOU 👏COULDN’T, 👏YOU 👏DIDN’T, 👏AND 👏NOW 👏YOU’RE 👏PAYING 👏THE 👏PRICE, 👏YOU 👏GODDAMN 👏IDIOT. 👏I 👏WILL 👏SHIT 👏FURY 👏ALL 👏OVER 👏YOU 👏AND 👏YOU 👏WILL 👏DROWN 👏IN 👏IT. 👏YOU’RE 👏FUCKING 👏DEAD, 👏KIDDO. 👏

Water Protectors,

We need your help to clean up the Oceti Main Camp and help Rosebud/Sicangu to clear all we can, in a good way, before the water comes with the anticipated floods.

If you have been here before and are prepared to work in the conditions of the North Dakota winter, please plan to come as soon as possible. Each camp is working each day, packing and cleaning, but there is no regular garbage pickup here. Recycling has been a challenge from the beginning. There is dubris from summer campers under the snows that came in fast.

To do this clean up well, we need able-bodied people to come and help us clear this out as soon as possible. The future of the next week or two is uncertain, but we KNOW the water is coming. Many are willing to bear the risk of law enforcement agents, militarized police force, and the frigid cold. In respect to the Sacred we have worked so hard to Defend.

Are you one of these?

Food is available, some shelter is available. Prayers are everywhere.

Please be ready for arctic conditions!
Bring extra gloves!

If you cannot come in person your donations to ocetisakowincamp.org can help us facilitate expenses.

  • Annabeth: *exists*
  • Hera: What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I could topple a statue on you at any moment, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on the Titans.
  • I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the goddamned goddess of marriage. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words.
  • You think you can get away with saying that shit to me? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am planning the fall of your puny human race, and your location is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands.
  • Not only am I extensively trained in abandoning my children, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the gods and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue.
  • But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it.
  • You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

“What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little gremlin? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class at Keral Keep, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on the Consulate, and I have over 300 confirmed burn spells. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top pyromancer in the entire renegade movement. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this plane, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the aethernet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the plane and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the firestorm, maggot. The firestorm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Keral Keep of Regatha and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the plane, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fire all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.”

What The Fuck Did You Just Fucking Say About Me You Little Bitch Ill Have You Know I Graduated Top Of My Class In The Royal Prospit Gaurd And Ive Been Involved In Numerous Secret Raids On The Kingdom Of Darkness And I Have Over 300 Confirmed Kills I Am Trained In Cavern Warfare And Im The Top Lumberjack In The Entire Alternian Armed Forces You Are Nothing To Me But Just Another Target I Will Wipe You The Fuck Out With Precision The Likes Of Which Has Never Been Seen Before On This Planet Mark My Fucking Words You Think You Can Get Away With Saying That Shit To Me Over The Internet Think Again Fucker As We Speak I Am Contacting My Secret Network Of Spies Across The Incipisphere And Your Ip Is Being Traced Right Now So You Better Prepare For The Storm Grub The Storm That Wipes Out The Pathetic Little Thing You Call Your Life Youre Fucking Dead Grub I Can Be Anywhere Anytime And I Can Kill You In Over Seven Hundred Ways And Thats Just With My Lipstick Not Only Am I Extensively Trained In Unarmed Combat But I Have Access To The Entire Arsenal Of The Alternian Armed Forces And I Will Use It To Its Full Extent To Wipe Your Miserable Ass Off The Face Of The Planet You Little Shit If Only You Could Have Known What Unholy Retribution Your Little Clever Comment Was About To Bring Down Upon You Maybe You Would Have Held Your Fucking Tongue But You Couldnt You Didnt And Now You’re Paying The Price You Goddamn Idiot I Will Shit Fury All Over You And You Will Drown In It Youre Fucking Dead Fuckass

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Nonary Game, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Free The Soul, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in sudoku warfare and I’m the top shifter in the entire timeline. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will betray you with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Moon, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me in the AB room? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of clones in FTS and your mind is being hacked right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my MIND HACK. Not only am I extensively trained in puzzle solving, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Radical-6 and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will spray acid all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, shifters.
Did you just say you needed emotional support and acknowledgement, you little ladybug? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Peace Corps, and I’ve been involved in numerous anonymous encouragements on Tumblr.com, and I have over 300 confirmed friends. I am trained in gorilla kindnesses and I’m the top comforter in the entire US armed forces. You are something to me: a potential friend. I will befriend you with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my words. You think your pain will be ignored when I see it on the Internet? Think again. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of allies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the comfort and acknowledgement, buddy. The comfort and acknowledgement that wipes out the grief you are dealing with. You’re fucking treasured, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can comfort you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in conflict resolution, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Peace Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your troubles off the face of the continent, you little flower. If only you could have known how much genuine concern for your well-being your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have felt how loved you already are. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now I know I need to remind you how much you mean to me, you amazing person. I will rain acknowledgement all over you and you will swim in it. You’re going to be all right, kiddo.
—  @anonaxolotl in this thread (as a quote because the thread is super long)
New GO [CoT] Fic: Dance At My Wedding

Title: Dance At My Wedding

Fandom: Good Omens

Pairing/Characters: Aziraphale/Crowley; Ensemble Cast (come and see)

Rating: T/M [only mildly NSFW]

Word Count: 13,400 (232,230 series to date)

Notes: This is CoT ‘Verse #59. It’s the long story I’d been outlining off and on since winter of 2015; however, it was always meant to be set in late 2016/early 2017, and then when actual!2016…went the way it did, I had to recalibrate. One of the deliberate features of this series is that it’s always anchored pretty firmly in real-world events concurrent with its writing. The short piece before this (that went live in December as part of GO Exchange) isn’t the happiest installment this series has ever seen, and this one is also fraught. I want to say you should be prepared for events on a similar wavelength as, say, #18 (Until Death) or #27-29 (As Above, So Below, Parts 1-3).  Well, not exactly on the same wavelength; I hope never to see ruckuses quite like those again. This story spans 1 December 2016 – 14 February 2017. The title is taken from something Mandy says to Aziraphale and Crowley in #16 (Beginners’ Archaeology).

Summary: I DIDN’T REALIZE CHOCOLATE HAD THAT SIGNIFICANT AN EFFECT ON CORDIALITY, said Azrael, stepping up close […].  LONG TIME NO SEE.

(Read it @ AO3)

*

[If you keep this in PDF or e-reader format, this is another good time to refresh the copy you have on file.  As ever, I’ve made minor tweaks to things like divider spacing and punctuation as and when I find them.]

WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST FUCKING SAY ABOUT ME, YOU LITTLE BITCH? I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW I GRADUATED TOP OF MY CLASS IN THE DIAMOND LEAGUE, AND I’VE BEEN INVOLVED IN NUMEROUS SECRET RAIDS ON VARIOUS PLANETS, AND I HAVE OVER 300 CONFIRMED SHATTERED GEMSTONES. I AM TRAINED IN GORILLA WARFARE AND I’M THE TOP GEMSTONE IN THE ENTIRE DIAMOND AUTHORITY. YOU ARE NOTHING TO ME BUT JUST ANOTHER TARGET. I WILL WIPE YOU THE FUCK OUT WITH PRECISION THE LIKES OF WHICH HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE IN THIS UNIVERSE, MARK MY FUCKING WORDS. YOU THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH SAYING THAT SHIT TO ME OVER MY COMMUNICATION LINE? THINK AGAIN, FUCKER. AS WE SPEAK I AM CONTACTING MY SECRET NETWORK OF SPIES ACROSS ALL OF SPACE AND YOUR IP IS BEING TRACED RIGHT NOW SO YOU BETTER PREPARE FOR THE STORM, MAGGOT. THE STORM THAT DESTROYS THE PATHETIC LITTLE THING YOU CALL YOUR GEMSTONE. YOU’RE FUCKING DEAD, KID. I CAN BE ANYWHERE, ANYTIME, AND I CAN KILL YOU IN OVER SEVEN HUNDRED WAYS, AND THAT’S JUST WITH MY BARE HANDS. NOT ONLY AM I EXTENSIVELY TRAINED IN UNARMED COMBAT, BUT I HAVE ACCESS TO THE ENTIRE ARSENAL OF THE HOMEWORLD ARMY AND I WILL USE IT TO ITS FULL EXTENT TO WIPE YOUR MISERABLE ASS OFF THE FACE OF ALL SPACE AND TIME, YOU LITTLE SHIT. IF ONLY YOU COULD HAVE KNOWN WHAT UNHOLY RETRIBUTION YOUR LITTLE “CLEVER” COMMENT WAS ABOUT TO BRING DOWN UPON YOU, MAYBE YOU WOULD HAVE HELD YOUR FUCKING TONGUE. BUT YOU COULDN’T, YOU DIDN’T, AND NOW YOU’RE PAYING THE PRICE, YOU GODDAMN IDIOT. I WILL SHIT FURY ALL OVER YOU AND YOU WILL DROWN IN IT. YOU’RE FUCKING DEAD, KIDDO.

Light: I’m not kira!!!

L:What the fuck did you just fucking say, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little binch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

So I can’t keep this to myself anymore:

Check, Please baseball!AU

It’s called Pitch, Please

Trans-boy Eric Bittle played softball all through high school and was an amazing pitcher

Samwell brings him on to play baseball and everyone is impressed by his skill, but here’s the thing: his overhand pitching sucks ass

Jack “Pitching Legend” Zimmermann helps Eric learn to switch from underhand to overhand with extra practice

Because of the Sandlot, Bitty is occasionally called Smalls

This brings a whole new depth to Bitty trying to fit in with the Bros™, while not realizing that his personality is perfect the way it is

In the inevitable coming out scene, Bitty starts his period right before a game and since the HRT he hasn’t been getting them often and he’s not prepared. He’s on the verge of tears in the locker room and Second Baseman Shitty (who has a perfect view of Jack’s ass) is like “Dude are you alright do you need to see the trainer?” and Bitty just really softly says “I started my period.” Without missing a beat, Shitty goes “Oh shit, no worries. I always carry tampons on me because Lardo is crazy irregular and never remembers to bring any with her. I got you, man.” And Bitty could cry with relief.

Give me Bitty in a backwards baseball cap and baseball pants trying to spit sunflower seeds and he just CAN’T because it’s making such a mess!!! And Jack is just HEART EYES MUTHAFUCKA because Bitty’s got one leg propped up on the wall of the dugout.

Give me Bitty who elected to have top surgery after receiving the scholarship because now he has this big leftover college fund. His nervous about the scars in the locker room.

Give me Former Fat Kid Jack Zimmerman with all his stretch marks on his hot bod clapping Bitty on his shoulder and being like “Man, we’ve all got stretch marks.”

GIVE ME LARDO AND BITTY BONDING OVER SOFTBALL

YOU CAN TAKE THE BOY OUT OF SOFTBALL BUT YOU CAN’T TAKE SOFTBALL OUT OF THE BOY

Give me Bitty who bakes up a storm in the Haus and who tears up when Outfielder!Holster and Ransom kiss him on the cheek and call him Mom because that was what the softball girls used to call him in high school. It makes him so nostalgic.

Bitty who sometimes wears make up when they dress up for away games because he likes it RIP IN PIECES JACK ZIMMERMAN

Bitty who pitches his first perfect inning and gets a huge hug from Jack

When Jack and Bitty finally start dating, the team channels The Sandlot once more and start calling Jack Benny

My sweet French Canadian Jack who at some point realizes he is sitting at MooMaw’s kitchen table in Georgia eating apple pie while waiting for the Fourth of July fireworks display and his boyfriend is wearing cut off daisy dukes and an American flag crop top and a backward baseball cap and that they both play baseball and Jack just shouts “JE SUIS QUEBECOIS!!”

Just…baseball AU

with all the Hate our girl Natasha’s been getting lately for opening up about her traumatic forced sterilization I just wanna point out THIS!!!! Just LOOK at the Last two frames. I didn’t notice it until just watched the AVENGERS again when Bruce says that line “Well I don’t always get what I want” he ROCKS THE CRADLE!!!!!!!!!!

He didn’t ask for this didn’t want it and had absolutely no way to prepare!!!! at his heart Bruce banner is just a goofy socially awkward scientist who liked the hope of a nice peaceful life like Clint has… wife couple kids but then the accident happened and Hulk was created taking away that chance.

Now here’s the difference

Nat was trained conditioned and I think it’s very likely she knew what was gonna happen. the woman she grew into she’s not really the maternal type.

Then there’s Bruce who VISABLY WISHES He could’ve been a dad have a nice little family.

So before you go off on Nat for DARING to have an EMOTION!!!!! Check which one is actually bringing up WANTING TO BE A PARENT!!!!!!

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^THIS GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have More Faith in Me Than I Do (AO3)

Summary: It’s nearly midnight. Tomorrow morning is the day Yuuri has to give his speech in front of the entire class. He’s not prepared at all. He can’t do it. He can’t. He can’t. Fortunately, Viktor thinks differently.

94. ‘You can do it.’ in the 100 ways to say ‘I love you’ series.


“You should take a break.”

Yuuri shakes his head, not even hearing the meaning of the words. He knows what Viktor is saying, though, because he has been trying to pull Yuuri away from the books two times now, without much success.

“I have to prepare the speech,” he says mechanically, looking at the materials spread before him. He sees no words, just the pages with text of I have to read this. And this, too. And this. And this. And this. Oh God, and these, too.

He glances at the clock on Viktor’s DVD player. 23:54.

The speech is tomorrow morning and he has nothing.

“Yuuri, you’re shaking,” he hears Viktor say. In the next moment, he’s covered with a heavy blanket and arms are pulling him close. “Come on, darling, you need to eat something and get a good night of sleep. I’m sure your professor will understand.”

“She won’t,” Yuuri mumbles, shaking his head, but Viktor only pulls him closer so he doesn’t have much room to move. There, sitting on the couch with his face pressed against Viktor’s neck and his body slowly warming up, something clutches at his lungs and squeezes. There seems to be not enough air so he does the only thing his mind deems helpful. He grips onto Viktor’s shirt and holds on tight, taking as much undeserved comfort as he can get, because Viktor is offering. “I’ve had a full month to prepare this,” he chokes out, and Viktor’s arms tighten around him, “I forgot, I forgot about this, and now I can’t do it—“

He can feel Viktor’s lips pressing to his hair. He can feel the warmth of his breath and for a moment it seems to seep through his scalp and into his brain and it calms him just a little. It takes another moment to hear Viktor’s soft shhh and to realise that they’re rocking on the couch, softly and slowly.

“You can do it,” Viktor murmurs to him, rubbing his hands over the blanket covering Yuuri’s shoulders. “I know you can.”

“No, I—I can’t focus, I don’t understand what I’m reading.”

“Take a break, then. Even a short one. Don’t read anything.”

“I’m not reading now.”

“But you’re still thinking about it.”

And yeah, Viktor is right. Of course, he’s right.

“I can’t help it, though…”

Viktor sighs and gently pulls away. “Here’s what we’re going to do,” he says, fingers curling around the edges of Yuuri’s blanket. He pulls at it and kisses Yuuri’s temple before pressing their foreheads together. “We’ll go to the kitchen. You’ll make tea and I’ll reheat dinner for you. We’ll sit in front of the TV and when the food is gone, we’ll prepare the speech. Sounds good?”

“You don’t have to stay up with me…”

“Sounds good?” Viktor repeats and Yuuri knows there’s no point in arguing now.

He smiles the tiniest smile – that’s all that stress lets him do.

“Sounds good.”

As Yuuri finishes the reheated lasagne and Viktor sips at his herbal tea, Phichit texts them both a screenshot of an email from Yuuri’s professor.

Tomorrow’s class is cancelled.

Cancelled.

For a moment, the entire apartment seems frozen in time. No sound reaches Yuuri, who just stares at his phone, breathlessly checking the email address of the professor because what if this isn’t true? People have joked around like that before, creating email accounts so similar to those of their professors that they looked the same at the first glance.

The address is correct, though. That means… He has no classes tomorrow.

No speech.

Yuuri doesn’t even realise that he’s crying, overwhelmed with relief and tiredness – this is all he’s capable of feeling when adrenaline leaves him.

Without a word, Viktor turns the TV off, puts the tea away and closes all of Yuuri’s books, using clean tissues as bookmarks. He pulls Yuuri up and leads him to his bedroom.

When Yuuri wakes up in the morning, he doesn’t remember changing his clothes or actually getting into bed. He doesn’t remember turning his alarm off so it doesn’t pointlessly wake him up way too early. He doesn’t need to remember it because he probably wasn’t the one who did any of these things.

He turns his head back and can’t help but smile.

Viktor is right there behind him, one arm wrapped around Yuuri’s middle, the other cushioning his own head. He’s still asleep.

Yuuri didn’t mean to stay the night. He was supposed to get back to his and Phichit’s apartment so he could at least change for the new day.

He has nowhere to be, though. Not now, not for the rest of today.

Besides, he thinks as he turns around underneath Viktor’s arm and cuddles close, it’s not like he’d want to be anywhere else.

Not ever.

Originally posted by totaldivasepisodes

“And at Summerslam, I’ll be one of the few who can say that they’ve beaten Nia Jax.” You said confidently, earning some cheers from the crowd.

Suddenly, Dean’s music sounded throughout the arena. You looked over in confusion as to why your boyfriend would come out here. You then smiled and shook your head as you watched him make his way down the ramp with his new cactus, that has yet been named, and his sign. You then noticed some of the stagehands bringing stuff in the ring to help him set up.

He was preparing for the Ambrose Asylum talk show.

Dean put his sign on the stand and his cactus on the stool. He got a microphone in his hand and checked the sound before looking at you with a smile on his face. You smiled at him with a chuckle. You were excited, you’ve always wanted to do an Ambrose Asylum segment.

“Sorry, this was too good to miss out on.” Dean told you before looking to the camera. “Ladies and gentleman, welcome to a new episode of the Ambrose Asylum!”

The crowd cheered as Dean adjusted the title belt on his shoulder.

“And today, we have the future Women’s Champion for Smackdown, assuming Smackdown decides to give you ladies what you deserve…” Dean rambled before continuing. “My girlfriend, Y/N. Now, Y/N, thanks for coming to the show.”

“Oh, thank YOU! I’m excited to be here, Dean.”

“Now this Sunday, you’re set to face Raw’s dominating Nia Jax…”