“Grow up and stop watching cartoons!”
“Ok. As soon as they stop being so fucking fabulous.”

  • Alistair:[Thinking] Wait, are they into me? Quick, make a bad joke and see if they laugh.
  • Alistair:[Out loud] What do the Grey Wardens say when they don't sense any Darkspawn? "Taint nothing to worry about"!
  • The Warden:[Laughs] That's really funny!
  • Alistair:[Thinking] Well, that not a fair test. That joke's hilarious.

I love how the further Dragon Age progresses as a series, the more retroactively badass everything the warden did in the first game becomes.

I mean, the guy you pulled out of a cage can become the freaking Arishok. That odd woman you meet in the tavern and decide to bring along can become Divine Victoria. Alistair can be king. That witch who turned into a dragon when you fought her was actually an ancient elven god. If we count Dragon!Andraste and the arch demon, that’s three potential dragon gods you can kill in that game.

You manage to resolve tense political situations that would take other groups months of efforts and tons of diplomatic resources and military presence with just yourself, your colourful band of misfit/murderous companions, and your dog. In under a year. 

You can even make friends with one of those insane darkspawn magisters that almost destroys the world in DA:I. Just like, palling around with him. Swapping notes. Doing trust building exercises while everyone else is losing their shit over Corypheus.

And it’s just hilarious because the Hero of Ferelden is this person who some of the most powerful individuals in Thedas will actually fall in line behind, this ridiculously competent and influential figure who solves world-ending problems like they’re Sunday morning crosswords, and it’s going to be useless in the coming crisis because they can’t bring the warden back.

Okay, but--the Warden and Zevran

–Killing the archdemon TOGETHER, as a fucking team, not a hero and a sidekick.

–The Warden getting pissed every time they come across a monument that only mentions the Warden.

–Incognito Warden starting a barfight because the minstrel left out the sexy tattooed elf, and Zevran laughing and staying out of it.

–The Warden insisting on examining Zevran head to toe like an overprotective parent every time they fight darkspawn because they have a horror of him getting the Taint–and Zevran just tolerantly standing with his arms out waiting for them to be done.

–The Warden stepping back to be Zevran’s shady enforcer while Zevran deals with the Crows.

–Zevran and the Warden spoiling each other at every opportunity–presents, surprises, whatever they can manage–because they never know how long they have.

–Zevran claiming the Warden’s body with tattoos that they design together and he inks.

–Zevran supporting them both by doing exhibition fights and taking training positions while the Warden hunts for a cure.

–Zevran and the Warden, partners, for as long as fate will give them.