the violist

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literally one of the coolest violists i know

4

All the skating makes sense now.

Exhibition pieces (inspired by the madness in this post)

Title credits to @theoppositeofprofound @goggles-mcgee @literalshipposts @violist-yamaguchi

Someone please make better fanart or gifs of this.

Which Orchestra Section Should You Fight?
  • Flute/Piccolo: You know you want to, those high notes nearly killed your eardrum. Be warned, though, flutes can double up as good stabbing weapons.
  • Oboe: Hmmmm… be cautious about that one. The oboe is angsty and tense, you do not know when they will lash out and you will never know when they will strike.
  • Clarinet/Bass Clarinet: As a clarinetist, I can assure you that we are weak, mostly harmless, but WEIRD. You may not be the same after fighting us.
  • All Saxes: All bark and no bite. No brains either. Just fight them, they show off too much for their own good.
  • Bassoon: NO! Do not fight the bassoon, they are an endangered species and we must protect them.
  • French Horn: What do you have against them, you can't even hear them. The french horn didn't do anything to you. The french horn is peace and chill, let them be, you have no reason to fight them.
  • Trumpet: YAAASSS! FIGHT THAT TRUMPET! PUNCH THEM WHERE IT HURTS- IN THE EGO!
  • Trombone: Are you stupid you'll get knocked out with the slide you silly person
  • Euphonium/Tuba: DO NOT FIGHT! Their instrument is heavy and metal and WILL give you a bad concussion.
  • Percussion: Nope. Uh uh. Bad idea. They whack stuff. They move big, heavy instruments. They own numerous instruments that could double up as a weapon. Do you want your eye poked out with a mallet?
  • 1st & 2nd Violins: YOU'LL BE SWARMED DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY THERE ARE???!!!???!!!!!!
  • Violas: Yeah, you may as well fight them. But you've already hurt them by calling their instrument a violin, so I don't know why you'd want to cause them further pain. But sure, go ahead. You have nothing to lose.
  • Cellos: Make sure to get them after a long, tiring rehearsal, that way their legs will be weak from sitting down for so long and they'll be close to an emotional breakdown. Just be careful, you don't wanna get hit their instrument.
  • Double Basses: Best not. Carrying around an instrument like that, they probably have SOME muscle.
  • Conductor: HOW STUPID CAN YOU GET??? NOOOOOOO!!!!! YOU DO NEVER FIGHT THE CONDUCTOR! DO NOT FIGHT THE CONDUCTOR! IF THEY DON'T MAKE YOU PLAY THE PIECE ALL THE WAY THROUGH AGAIN, THEY WILL POKE AND JAB YOU WITH THEIR BATON THEN THEY WILL FENCE YOU WITH THEIR BATON AND BEAT YOU AND THEN THEY WILL USE THEIR BATON AS A HARRY POTTER WAND AND AVARDA KEDAVRA YOU OKAY? DO NOT FIGHT THE CONDUCTOR! YOU WILL DIE! THEY ARE MAD AND UNPREDICTABLE AND NOT TO BE FOUGHT.
Reblog if you think the viola is a beautiful instrument!!

I’m kinda sick of seeing viola hate (and I’m not even a violist!). Let’s spread some love for this awesome instrument!

Classical instrument asks!

1. What is your instrument’s full name?
2. When did you get your instrument?
3. What brand and model is it?
4. Is it a he, she, or somewhere in between?
5. What made you choose that instrument?
6. Favourite thing about your instrument?
7. Least favourite thing about your instrument?
8. What accent would your instrument have if it could talk?
9. Three adjectives to describe your instrument’s personality.
10. What classical song best describes your instrument?
11. What non classical song best describes your instrument?
12. Finish this sentence: “my instrument and I are like______”
13. Why did you name your instrument that?
14. What is your instrument’s aesthetic?
15. If your instrument could go shopping at the mall, where would it shop?
16. What musical era best suits your instrument?
17. What is the most damage that has been done to your instrument?
18. Write a letter to your instrument!
19. If your instrument was a character on “The Office”, who would they be?
20. What similarities do you and your instrument share?

Instruments/Instrumentalists from the eyes of a violist:

Flute: Wow that’s….that’s high up….wow…..

Piccolo: Oh dear……oh dear….I thought..I thought flute was high up…….

Oboe: That A440………👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌there👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit

English horn: sounds like a hug from a mom… I love it

Clarinet: Are all clarinetists horny stoners or just the ones I know?

Bassoon: Sometimes your toot toots are on offbeats of my pluck plucks!! Sounds good, friends!! 

Contrabassoon: flbbhbhbhbhhbhdlbhbhbhbhbhbhhbblllblbhbbl

Saxophones: Where r u hiding? Come play the Glazunov concerto there’s a viola solo… :’( I never see u guys but i know u must be somewhere

Trumpet: Ow! U guys are loud!! I need earplugs!!! Good job doin’ u tho, good job.

Horn: I don’t get why u sit behind the woodwinds when ur a brass? Sometimes I can’t tell if ur supposed to crack when u hit a high note or if it’s on accident.

Trombone: I admire your constant sliding. Shifts are tough. 

Tuba: But a tuba is so big….so heavy…wh?y ? would u do that to urself? 

Piano:  how can all your fingers be so independent???? I don’t..get it?

Harp: The day I realized harpists play with their feet and their hands…that was the day I realized a harpist would always win in a fight no matter what. Harpists are the most badass of all instruments

Percussion: You do so much!! Do you wear a pedometer?? How many steps do you take during a symphony??? Wow!!!

Violin: Nicer to me than to each other, but only because I’m not their competition.

Second Violin: Oh man, u guys can work so hard adn get no recognition sorry…but also sometimes u guys don’t work as hard so make sure to be hard workers even tho u don’t get recognition…..I know that feel…

Viola: The only people who can tell viola jokes and not get punched. Care about each other and just want each other to succeed

Cello: Either amazing and the nicest people I ever met,,, or I want to push them off a cliff there’s no in between. 

Bass: I would take a nap in my bass bag if I played bass.