the upper town

Idea for the next animal crossing game:

you can choose the climate or your town. On the train or whatever Rover asks “what’s the weather like in (town name)?” And the options are “it’s super dry!” “Pretty cold.” “It rains a lot” and “normal, I guess.”

Dry- desert town, rains/ snows MAYBE once a month. Sandy areas instead of dirt on upper half of town.

Cold- snow from October to April. Sun sets much earlier in winter and much later in summer. (Making the winter and summer solstice days make more sense)

Rainy- rain and snow more days than sunny. More thunderstorms

Normal- default animal crossing weather

Aim to Please (NSFW)

Originally posted by official-hartwin

Eggsy Unwin x Reader

Warnings: Smut

A/N: I fucking love this gif, I want this image of his little shithead face on everything. This boy is ruining my fucking life.


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Hallstatt by Paulina Wierzgacz
Via Flickr:
Hallstatt, Austria, summer 2016

anonymous asked:

CP 14 Days of Love #8: Single and Bitter is Better Together (anti-valentine’s day, single awareness day)

Day 8 of @softkent‘s Valentine’s Day fic-a-thon

Ah, today was turning out to be a lovely day. The wind was blowing, the snow was falling in a wintry mix between actual snow and straight up sleet, all the red decorations were being soaked. Bitty sat in a cozy little coffee shop in downtown Providence, having taken up residence in an armchair by the window with a cup of rare out of season pumpkin spice coffee. It was the day before Valentine’s and Eric Bittle was not above admitting that he really very much abhorred the holiday. It’s hard to watch everyone else enjoy themselves and be in totally utterly grossly in love when you’re alone, and have been alone for years, all your years if you’re Bitty.

“Hey Bits! I’m so glad you were free to meet tonight!” Lardo dropped into the chair next to his with a happy smile. “I just got a call that I think will be right up your alley!  I know you were planning to have the night free tomorrow but I have an assignment for you!” The unholy glee in her eyes would be at the very least disquieting to other people but Bitty knew her too well.

“Well what have you got for me, I’ll at least give it a listen, though I can’t promise more than that.”

Bitty and Lardo worked for a local paper on the Providence area, mostly the small towns in the area, Lincoln, Cumberland, that sort of small, middle to upper class town.  Lardo was one of the editors that oversaw the larger sections, she was in charge of arts and leisure. Bitty was her food and restaurant consultant.

“I got a call this afternoon, you know that little French restaurant in Greenville? Pets de Soeurs, they called and they want us to review them!”

“Wait, wait. The one that was just  reviewed by The New Yorker and The Washington Post? Why would they want us to review them?”

“The owners are unhappy that so many of their customers are tourists.  One of the two owners is a small town native and he wants their restaurant to have that feel he was used to growing up. They want a local paper to give them look and hopefully the residents in the area will take notice.  And they only trust our paper to do it!  What do you say, I know you don’t have any plans.”

Bitty couldn’t possibly resist. It was a good opportunity for the paper, it was a good opportunity for the restaurant, and it was a good opportunity to actually sample a pretty high end restaurant in the area.

“What time are they expecting me?”


Jack had just sat down at his table.  He was really looking forward to the night, not because it was Valentine’s, that actually put a bit of a damper on the night in his opinion. No, he was looking forward to it because of what he had planned.  His Maman had called last week about an article she’d read in the Wall Street Journal.  Apparently, there was a French restaurant that specialized in French Canadian cuisine in a small town outside of Providence and it had been getting good reviews from papers across the country. Jack was very much looking forward to a familiar home cooked meal. He hadn’t had one in years.

Jack was perusing the menu when suddenly all the blood rushed from his head to his feet. The front door had opened and a familiar laugh had wafted through the air. Jack knew that laugh. Oh no, oh please, no no no. Not that. The last thing he wanted to deal with was getting caught alone at a restaurant on Valentine’s day by he well meaning and very happily engaged ex. He couldn’t allow that to happen. Kenny would start pitying him and worse, trying to set him up. That wasn’t happening in this lifetime, thanks.


Bitty was just asking the very nice waiter for water without lemon and asking what the most popular appetizer on the menu was when a very tall, very cute, young man slid into the seat across from him.  

“Wow, how are you, I know I said I couldn’t make it tonight but I managed to get away.  I hope you haven’t order yet!”

The very cute young man was looking at him as if to say just go with it, please. Bitty flashed a cocked eyebrow at him before committing.  

“Oh, I’m so pleased you could come! I must have missed your text, hun! I’ve only order a drink, did you want to try an appetizer?” Nodding at the waiter to indicate that everything was fine, he totally knew this stranger and could we get him something to drink before he explains himself entirely?

The waiter took the man’s drink order and hurried off.

Jack had gotten lucky. So lucky. Now he just had to explain himself.

“I am SO sorry. Please go with me on this. I know you don’t know me but I swear its for a good cause.” Jack deployed his puppy dog pleading eyes at full strength.

“And what cause might that be, Mr. Total Stranger that I’ve apparently made plans to have dinner with?”

“My ex.”

“Your ex.”

“He’s here. With his fiance. Who is also my coworker. They can’t find me eating alone on Valentines.”

“So this is just your pride talking?” Bitty was regretting this more and more by the minute. “Just because you don’t want to see your ex boyfriend with a gorgeous girl on his arm and let him win—”

Jack cut in, “That’s not my problem.”

“What?”

“That’s not my problem. And his gorgeous girl is about three inches taller than me and plays hockey with me so I’m not terribly concerned about how attractive his partner is. It’s worse than that. He’s going to start trying to set me up.  They’ve just gotten engaged and I’m very happy for them but they think, well he thinks that everyone should be as happy as he is and he started setting people up on dates…without telling them. I cannot get dragged into that. Do you have any idea how unpleasant blind dates set up by the least talented matchmaker on the PLANET are? Lemme tell you, they’re almost physically painful.”

Bitty couldn’t help it. He started to laugh. He tried to stifle it but there was no use, the giggles just bubbled out.  

Jack just looked at him, betrayed.

“Alright, that does sound fairly horrendous,” Bitty half shrugs, “I’m in.”

Jack sighed in relief.

“Well, what shall I call you then?”

Jack spent the rest of the night with Bitty, happily chatting over some pretty exceptional Quebecois cuisine, about who he was, a pro-hockey star, where he came from, Providence now, and why he hated Valentine’s, it’s hard to be a pro-athlete in the closet and then to come out without a partner. Bitty enjoyed every minute of it, sharing his own stories and dislike for the holiday. In fact they ended up closing the restaurant down that night, with a few quiet moments taken to speak to the married couple that owned the restaurant. As Jack and Bitty were walking out, Bitty was trying to work up the courage to ask for a second, or possibly first date. Jack had his hands stuffed into his pockets and was looking at his shoes as they walked towards the parking lot.

“Do you think, do you think I could have your number? I had a really good time tonight and I’d hate to lose contact because I wasn’t man enough to ask you for it.” Jack looked up at Bitty with a crooked, hopeful smile.


“And THAT is how Papa met Daddy by absolutely hating Valentine’s day!”

“And how you met Uncle Dex and Uncle Nursey and they catered the engagement party and the wedding and the baby showers!” Leena always remembered that part and piped in because Nursey had trained her to, he thought it was a very important part of their story.

“And Auntie Lardo was so happy that you found Papa that she paid to have a table dedicated to you every Valentines!” Jason was wiggling around under Daddy’s chair but obviously still listening.

“And Uncles Tater and Kenny STILL won’t let it go and claim that it’s their fault we’re together!” Jack called out, still aggrieved after all these years, from the baby’s room down the hall where he was taking his turn on diaper duty.

Bitty leaned back in his arm chair, with an unseasonable cup of pumpkin spice in a permanent to go cup, safe from his children, and looked out the window at the blowing snow, and smiled to himself.

“And they lived happily ever after..”


*crash* “DAAAAADDDYYYYYYYYYYYYY!”

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View from Upper town Zagreb by Boris Štromar
Via Flickr:
Rolleiflex 3.5F + Efke 100.

Eastern Massachusetts Gothic, Part 2

In Salem, tourism is a thriving industry, built on the infamy of the Witch Trials. Witches, ghouls, and ghosts walk in costume in Derby Square, handing out fliers for nighttime ghost tours. Perhaps this is how Salem buries its dead, you think, realizing that you never even learned all of the names of the 19 victims of the Salem Witch Trials. The Grim Reaper walks up to you. He hands you a flier with a discount for a nighttime ghost tour.

Hundreds, perhaps thousands of people pass Boston’s homeless on the streets each day, averting their eyes and quickening their pace as they walk by people holding donation cans, signs, pleas for money or assistance, some acknowledgement of their plight. You walk by too, and you always feel a twinge of guilt. Sometimes you contemplate buying one of these people a sandwich or a coffee, or asking them if they’re alright. Most people wonder the same thing. But no one stops; kindness disrupts the monotonous, soulless routine of daily life. You continue walking.

In your upper-middle class suburban town, you are always told to avoid the poorer neighboring towns or cities. They’re dangerous, you’re told, dirty and mean and not meant for you. They’re places to be ridiculed, scorned, and feared. You must stay where it’s safe, in your social bubble. Here, you’re told, everything is fine. People are kind, the schools are good, the community is close. Stay in the community, you’re told. And you stay.

After Halloween, many pumpkins remain on porches, stoops, and sidewalks, left to rot. Their carved features become distorted as the structure collapsed on itself, blackening as it decays and liquifies. You begin to avoid the houses guarded by Jack'o Lanterns.

Some mornings, you wake with a start to the sound of gunshots and fleeing birds. It takes a few moments to realize that you are not the target, and that the firing comes from across the border in New Hampshire. At nightfall, you can’t sleep; the sound of fireworks and rockets going off from across the Merrimack River keeps you up. Fucking New Hampshire.

The shores of rivers are plentiful with trash turned treasure. You find clay pipes, marbles, bottles, and broken china fragments with beautiful patterns. You also find dead fish and animal bones. There was that time you found what looked like human teeth. You wonder how they got there, but you’re not sure you really want the answer.

Everyone has a Harvard or BU sweatshirt. And yet, you know no one who goes to Harvard, and only a handful who go to BU. You never bother to say anything about it.

There are also a lot of people with Cape Cod t-shirts and sweatshirts. You assume they’re not from around here. Almost no one goes to the Cape. It will be underwater soon enough anyway.

A Housemaid - Part 1

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Originally posted by taevhyung

mymisstina : “Can I ask a scenario/series with V where your mother works for the Kim’s house and you meet him after replacing your mom. You become close friends and develop feelings for each other. Later,his parents want to set him on a date with a wealthy girl but he refuses and confesses he wants to marry you which is something really unexpected. You reject and leave the Kim’s house ignoring his calls because you know you’re “poor”. He and his parents surprisingly visit your family and know everything?”

We love this idea so much! We hope you don’t mind, but since your request was so detailed, we decided to make it into a really short series (4-5 parts lol). Thanks for requesting and we hope you like it :)


Genre: Fluff

Characters: Kim Taehyung x You

Word Count: 1, 848

Plot: After an unfortunate event, you must replace your mother’s job as a housemaid at the Kim residence. 

(Y/N) = Your Name

(Y/M/N) = Your Mother’s Name


It was late at night and you were waiting for your mother to return home from work. You had made her favorite dish and didn’t want to start dinner without her. It was 10:04 pm and your mother usually came home at 9 pm. You were getting worried.

You constantly looked out the window for your mother, but still, she wasn’t home. You watched the smoke from the meal you had made slowly fade away. You were hungry, but you couldn’t eat without your mother.

Suddenly, you heard the door knob turn. You ran out of the seat and opened the door to find your mother.

“Mom, why are you so late?” You asked as you helped her with her coat. She smiled at you and gave you a cold kiss on the cheek.

“I’m sorry for worrying you hun’. I was caught up doing some paperwork.”

You looked at your mother confused. She worked as a housemaid for a rich family that lived in the upper part of town. All she did was clean, make food, and do other things to assist the family. What kind of paperwork could she be doing?

Your mother walked into the kitchen and looked at the stove top with the meal that you made.

“Ah, see. You’d be perfect.” She turned to you and pinched your cheeks.

“Perfect for what?” You asked hesitantly. You waited for an answer as you watched your mother lift up the lid on the pot. The steam escaped and warmed up the whole kitchen.

“(Y/N),” she put the lid down and looked down at the stove top, “your aunt is sick and I have to take care of her." 

You only had one aunt, which of whom you weren’t really close with. "I’m sorry to hear that” you lied.

“You have to take over my job over at Kim household while I’m away–” your eyes widened as you took in the words that she said. No way were you going to be someone’s maid.

“–No mom! I don’t want to.” You crossed your arms and clenched your jaw to further yourself from saying anything hurtful to your mother.

“Please darling,” your mother walked towards you with a desperate look on her face, “we need the money and we can’t afford to not work." 

You looked away from her and your eyes wandered around the house. You knew she was right. Your house was tiny and had many things that needed to be fixed. Besides the mending of your home, if you didn’t take the job, there was no way you’d survive. 

"Fine,” you sighed, “when do I start?" 

"Tomorrow.”

—–

The next morning, you woke up with a uniform on your bed. It belonged to your mother from when she first got her job there. The Kim family considered your mother like their family too. Ironically, you never met them.

You walked down stairs to catch your mother having her morning coffee.

“You look beautiful!” She said as she watched you get your breakfast ready. It was embarrassing really. Your mother acted proudly as if you were taking over her life long business as a fashion designer, or even a lawyer.

A few moments later, it was time to go. Your mother waited for you at the doorway as you helped her carry down her last bag. 

“Be good. When you get there, Mrs. Kim will tell you what to do,” your mother tucks a piece if hair behind your ear, “remember to have manners–”

“I know mom.” You rolled your eyes and walked out the door. You saw a taxi driver and helped your mom load her bags into the trunk.

“You know, there’s a boy your age there. He’s really sweet.” You closed the trunk and turned to your mother with annoyance. 

“I think you’ll really like him!” She winked and you sarcastically smiled at your mother. 

She entered the taxi and rolled down her windows. “I love you” she said. You returned her words and watched her fade away into the distance.

—–

You got off the bus and walked towards the gates. The Kims’ house was surrounded by tall, black gates; you needed to buzz in to enter.

You looked for some sort of keypad or door bell. When you finally located it, you saw a red button. You assumed that it was the right button, so you pressed it.

“Kim residence,” said a voice through the speaker.

“Um hi.. I’m the new housemaid…" 

"Ah yes come on in,” said the voice, following with a loud buzz noise that made you jump.

You stood there and waited, but nothing happened. The gate was still closed and all that you could hear was the birds chirping from the distance.

You thought about buzzing in again, but you were kind of afraid too. 

“Hey”

You jumped at the sound of the mysterious voice. You grabbed your chest to slow down your heart rate as you turned around.

“Are you the new maid?” Asked the boy who the voice belonged to. He had beautiful tan skin and orange hair. His eyes sparkled with the sunlight.

“Y-yes,” you said shyly. The boy smiled at you and walked forward. You backed away but soon realized that he was only walking towards the gate.

“The gate is messed up,” he gave the gate a strong push, “you have to push it after the buzz”. 

His push wasn’t strong enough for the whole gate to open. But there was just enough room for a person to fit through it.

He led out his arm, signaling for you to enter first. You smiled at him and did so. He followed you.

“So what’s your name?” He asked.

“(Y/N)”.

“Wow. That’s a really pretty name.” You smiled at his comment, but you were walking in front of him, so he couldn’t see it.

The boy picked up his pace so he could be next to you. You noticed that he was watching you, almost studying all your features. You looked at him from the corner of your eye and he looked away.

“Sorry, it’s just that you look a lot like your mom,” he laughed, “almost like twins.”

You scoffed and brushed off his comment. You heard that you looked like your mom, but never been called twins. 

You were almost at the door and the boy still walked by your side. You thought it was kind of awkward because how long and silent the walk was, but didn’t really mind it.

“Uhh.. What’s your name?” You asked out of the blue. The boy had his hands up behind his head and turned down to face you.

“I’m Taehyung. Kim Taehyung” he smiled. 

‘He must be the boy my mom was talking about’ you thought as you nodded your head to him.

When you got to the door, Taehyung rushed before you to open. Again, he led his arm out for you to enter first.

When you walked in, you were blown away by how big and beautiful the house was. The floor was made of marble, and the ceiling held up a big beautiful chandelier made up of crystal.

As you were taken in the beauty of the Kims’ home, your thoughts were interrupted by women approaching you.

“Kim Taehyung! I told you not to leave without letting me know beforehand” she yelled. She pinched Taehyung’s ear and he bent over slightly with his teeth clenched. 

“Mom!” He shouted. Suddenly his mother turned her head and looked to you.

“Oh!” She let go of Taehyung’s ear and he rubbed it softly, “you must be (Y/M/N)’s daughter!” She pulled you into a hug. 

“You look just like her! It’s so nice to meet you!” You looked up at her and smiled. She was really beautiful. She had long hair that was curled, and a smile just as wide as Taehyungs.

“It’s nice to meet you too, Mrs. Kim!” She placed an arm on your back as she led you into the kitchen. You noticed that Taehyung didn’t follow. Instead, he walked up the stairs. However, he watched you as you walked into the kitchen with his mother.

“I hate to have you do all this work on the first day.. But we have a party coming up and need all the help we can get.” She looked at you apologetically and you could tell that she was actually sincere. You didn’t really care how much work you did, though. Honestly, all that you cared about was the money you would be getting in the end. 

Mrs. Kim opened up a notebook and told you everything that needed to be done. She told you what needed to be cleaned, what time the meals should be cooked, and even when to walk the dogs. She then took you on a tour of the house. She showed you every room and the backyard. 

“That’s all for now” she concluded, “just know that this is your home too now!” She smiled once again. Her smile was contagious, so you couldn’t help but smile as well. 

The two of you walked to a room in which she entered. When she came out, she had a mop and a bucket in her hands. 

She sighed “the front of the house gets really dirty, so I guess you can start there!” You grabbed the items from her hand and nodded.


You walked towards the front of the house and looked around to observe the floor. It looked pretty clean to you, but you did as you were told to and started mopping. You hummed a tune as you thought about how so far, you were somewhat enjoying your first day as a housemaid at the Kim residence. 

It took you quite a while to get into all the little nooks and crannies of the floor. You kept thinking to yourself how it’s possible for this floor to be so dirty yet look so clean? After some time and a whole lot of cleaning products later, the floor shimmered and glistened. You were extremely proud of yourself for doing something as little as mopping a floor and this humored you. 

As you were doing the finishing touch ups, which included rubbing the scuff marks off the floor, you heard heavy footsteps behind you. You turned around and in plain sight was someone standing with their dirty shoes on your newly cleaned floor. This enraged you. It was the fact that their shoes were so dusty and unclean and it ruined the floor. You proceeded to look up at this person who dared to step on your floor. 

“Hello, you must be (Y/M/N)’s daughter, I’m Mr. Kim; I hope I didn’t muddy up the floor too much?” he spoke with a deep voice that was intimidating and frightening at the same time. You put on a fake smile and clenched your jaw as you watched him proceed his way across the foyer with his dirty shoes. Then and there, you knew that this job wasn’t going to be a walk in the park…


Thanks for reading! | Scenario requests are open so please send in your requests! (we don’t do smut) | We don’t own any of these GIFs. All GIFs belong to their rightful owners.

TalesFromThePizzaGuy: Worst customer horror stories? Is it always this bad?

So I work at pizza slut as a driver and manager in what i consider an upper middle class california town.

I get cursed out so often at work. Like 4 times in the last 2 days. And not like “fuck you” its like the worst things you could think to say to someone. One woman was so bad I almost called the police to kick her out. She was upset because she wanted free cheesesticks (but she didnt add cheesesticks to her order and she already had a 50% off pizza coupon?). After my tall, built driver happily threw her out I ended up quitting on the spot because I’m done being treated like absolute trash over $7 cheese sticks.

Is my stores area just a soulless black hole? Is this a problem in all food service jobs? And I’d love to hear some horror stories about past customers if anyone has any.

By: Spookiestbacon

fanfiction.net
The Hunt Chapter 2: I Need A Better Fake ID, an earthbound fanfic | FanFiction

What? The second chapter of that really John Hughes-esque Ness/Lucas fanfiction is out already? Amazing. It’s almost as if the author here is actually trying instead of being the lazy jackass that he usually is.

Still not convinced? Okay- fair enough. But here are some real lines from the chapter that might sell you:

-“…despite having enough money to buy out half of our upper-middleclass town, they never learned how to buy birth control.”

-“"The universe, in all its mysteries, is predictable in one thing: spiting my sorry fucking existence.“”

-“If you see any one of the aforementioned, full rights are granted to use the offender as a living target for a game of crotch-shot.”

ALTERNATIVELY:
Start this wild ride from the first chapter!
Read this story on AO3!

FANCY PARTY SHENANIGANS

Prologue:

“Oh no…” the fox mumbled as his eyes scanned the letter in his hands. He groaned, hanging his head low in defeat.

“What troubles you?” a sweet yet robotic voice asked behind him. CC walked towards the two-tailed fox, tugging on his lab coat to encourage him to answer her. Tails smiled as he turned to her.

“Oh, it’s just this charity event on behalf of Yellow Sky Industries. I completely forgot I agreed to it.”

“Do you mean the annual Young Heroes barbeque? I have heard a lot about that.” CC responded.

“I wish. That would be a blast. No, this is some banquet thing I have to host for the ‘upper class’ folk in town. You can’t get these guys to donate money to anything unless they’ve had their fill of crumpets and what not,” Tails growled, crumpling the letter into a ball before tossing it in a nearby bin, but CC let out a buzz of excitement.

“A social?! With guests to entertain and partake in ‘the mingling’?! I know the exact garment to wear!” She ran towards one of her most recent prototypes, quickly typing a code into the machine and yanking on a lever. Before Tails could interject, a shower-curtain-like divider sprung up between the pair. A few quick “zips” and “whirrs” could be heard from behind the curtain before the shield dropped and CC stood proudly in a formal gown, her synthetic hair extended and pulled tight into an updo. She straightened her posture and clasped her hands behind her back, waiting patiently for a compliment.

Tails blinked a couple of times, still trying to process what had just happened. He coughed when he realized he had been staring too long and shook his head. “This… This isn’t good news. Our friends… they don’t handle formal events well.” He ran his fingers through his fur, already stressing from the party he was meant to plan. “I used to laugh when Sticks would runamuck at the Awardy Awards, but they’re all terrible. You should have seen the weddings, they were absolute fiascos!”

CC walked up to Tails and smiled, her eyes half-lidded. “That is because you did not have my assistance,” she stated matter-of-factly. She placed her hands on his shoulders before firmly knocking him down into a seated position. She paced across the room, her perfect posture making her appear as if she was gliding instead of walking. “It is an important marker in every person’s life to plan some sort of gathering, correct? I have not completed that task. I would be most delighted to do it.” Her eyelids flickered as she paused in thought, flipping through her internal rolodex. “There are a multitude of venues that would be impressive. Yes, the observatory, that is the location. Caterers…searching… Aha, one of our frequent customers owns a local restaurant. I am sure it would put us in even better standing if we had them cater-”

Tails lost track of what she was saying, partially because she began speaking too quickly for Mobian ears and partially because he was more than a little impressed. He sat back in his chair, smiling as he watched her brainstorm. It calmed and excited him at the same time and he was thankful for the distraction she provided. He shot up when he noticed her piercing electric blue eyes meeting his, a gentle smile on her face.

“Besides, ‘how bad can it be?’”

Oh great. She just had to say that.

[NEXT]


Told you I’d come up with some silly random comic series alongside HHNF. I have too many ideas in my head, I’m being torn apart! FPS isn’t really linear, it’s just a bunch of tiny moments from one night. Also, there will be alcohol. More specifically, some very drunk hedgehogs. You have been warned!

I don't rewind your toilet, please don't sh*t in my video store.

So this story is from quite a while ago, in one of those endangered White Rhinos of the retail world, a chain video store.

My chain store had a lot of management turnover, as well as “franchise turnover” (meaning we were passed between a couple of franchise groups before landing somewhere in limbo). This, along with the fact that all of the employees knew the management login and password meant that we had more power than we should have, and little to no threat of firing or legal repercussions (I remember a kid lifting and selling a bunch of new releases of LOTR1 before the official release date).

Now, being a “family place” (the 2nd biggest national chain), and being the store with the biggest selection in an area of upper-middle-class suburbs/towns, we had a LOT of issues with entitled mombies and kids, but this was one of my favorites.

There were 2 of us manning the counter, so I stepped out and started asking customers if they needed help finding anything. There was a mother with 4 kids, the youngest being a toddler in diapers, wandering around the video game section. I asked if they needed help, and was given something of a harrumph/sigh in response. Lacking a translation for “frumpy groan,” I simply said I was around and if they needed help just holler. I noticed the toddler was tugging on his diapers and doing a duck walk, but being 20 and not experienced with kids, I wasn’t aware just what that signified.

Note that she never asked to use the restroom, or indicated that there was an issue.

I did the rest of my rounds and returned to the video game aisle, where I noticed what looked like a trail of chocolate covered raisins leading to the toddler. Thinking the little sh*t had helped himself to our treats (which were stupidly in reach of grubbey little sh*ts), I looked for the box, only to see another round one drop from the groin-goblin’s leg. I was a bit shocked with that, but then he started pulling at his diaper, dropping more and more while Mom is ignoring his whimpers and waiting in line.

I walk up behind her, poke her shoulder and ask if she would like some rags, a bag, and cleaner to take care of her little sh*t monster, and she replies that it isn’t her job, and isn’t that what we are getting paid for?

Now, she is 3 spots back in the line, so I tell her that I can help her out on my register. I scan her card, and promptly note on her account that her kid had sh*t allover the floor, and that their account was permanently disabled.

I told her that the system wasn’t taking that card, and asked if there was another account for their family (there was one for their teen, and one for the husband.) I got the phone number and looked up the other accounts, repeating the same note to all of them, and using the manager code to mark all of their (quite substantial) late fees as “to be sent to collections.”

I then smiled, and cut the card up in front of her, and told her that since she can’t respect the store or the employees, and since she is unable to control her children, and refused to clean up after them, that she her accounts were locked and that she was banned.

She tried to use the other accounts, but I told her they were irreparably locked too, and that her household was flagged so they couldn’t get any new cards. She flew off the handle, screaming and shouting, yelling that cleaning the floors there wasn’t her job (it is when your panty-stain decides to sh*t all over it), and that she would call the manager, owner or corporate and report me. I told her to go ahead, nothing would happen to us.

She grabbed her kid (still dropping nuggets) and screamed for the rest of her brood, loading them into the van and peeling out of the parking lot with her middle finger raised.

She called back that night asking for a manager, and I had a real fun time pretending to be Chuck, the territorial manager (not a real person). I told her she and her family were banned from any stores in the district, and that we would be pressing charges if her or any of her family tried to open up a new account.

I ended up having to clean up the sh*t, which sucked, so I called up the other video store in the town and let them know what had happened (or that they were habitual shop lifters, I can’t remember) but they ended up banned from there.

They tried coming in and renting a few times, even trying to set up new accounts, but each time they were flagged, both because the incident and their late fees (which I guess they couldn’t pay off now that the account was locked, and they were sent to collections for them, but I have no sympathy).

They ended up getting sent to collections and having a LOT of issues due to that, and tried to call and write the store to make impotent legal threats, but I had made sure to put notes up on the desk and the system.

They came into another job I was working a year or two later and started yelling at me, asking why I ruined their lives. I told them the truth, it was because their actions in the video store were reprehensible, and that we didn’t need customers like that. I also said that if they returned their videos on time they wouldn’t have had fees, and then they wouldn’t have gone to collections. I suggested that they perhaps learn from this experience, and readdress how they treat retail employees. This just further enraged them (the husband was in my face). They were asked to leave, and “banned” from there as well.

Seriously though, if she would have even apologized I would have let it go, but having to clean up her kid’s sh*t and deal with her attitude? That (in my mind at least) justified the repercussions.

seconds-and-centuries  asked:

Hi! I'm sure you get this a lot, but I've just seen your ACNL map on my dashboard and I was wondering how you made it. c: I'd love to do something like that to help me plan my town but I wouldn't even know where to begin! I looked through your "anne plays new leaf" tag but couldn't seem to find anything on how to make a map like that, I'm sorry for bothering you if there's a guide or something on your blog already that I just couldn't find;; Thanks very much!

oh wow, i wasn’t expecting that to get more than maybe a handful of likes lol.

hello, though! i hope you won’t mind me publishing this on the offchance anyone else is curious–it’s really quite simple, actually, but i’ll give a few tips. there are probably better ways to do this, but this is how i go about it.

PROCESS

firstly, you just need MSpaint, and some patience.

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Meersburg in Baden-Württemberg, Southwestern Germany, lies on the Bodensee (Lake Constance). It’s known for its medieval old part of town. The lower part of town (Unterstadt) and upper town (Oberstadt) are reserved for pedestrians only and connected by 2 stairways and a steep street. The name means “Castle on the Sea”, referring to the castle which, according to a tradition from 1548, was built here in 630 by the Merovingian king Dagobert I. The commune obtained the status of free city in 1299. In 1803 it was annexed to the Land of Baden. After WW2, it was part of the French military zone.