the undesirable no 1

  • harry potter: aka the boy who lived, the chosen one, master of death, undesirable no. 1, triwizard champion, gryffindor seeker, quidditch captain
  • newt scamander: aka magizoologist, mr. english guy, guy with a suitcase full of monsters, mother of nifflers, mother of occamies, mother of bowtruckles, mother of thunderbirds, mother of swooping evils, mother of erumpents, mother of demiguises, mother of mooncalves, mother of graphorns, mother of nundus, mother of

okay but harry getting halfway through auror training only to wake up one day and realize how unhappy he is so he skips the day and just goes to hogwarts meaning to talk to mcgonagall but instead he runs into neville who is apprenticing as herbology professor and he ends up shadowing him all day and that afternoon halfway through his cup of tea and biscuit he just blurts out ‘i want to be a professor’ and mcgonagall just smiles like she already knew (spoiler: she did) and with absolutely no hesitation she adds him to the staff roster and gets him training with the current DADA professor and then two years later when he steps into the classroom the first time as a professor he puts up three framed pictures; the first, his Undesirable Number 1 poster goes on the wall, a picture of the second order (at bill and fleurs wedding) and a picture of the marauders on his desk, and for the first time in forever he feels happy and safe and at peace.

Updated Masterlist [04/02/2015]

($) = Contains smut

Ashton

Calum

Luke

Michael

Series

1. Uni Series

2. Ready to Run (Cashton)

He accidentally hits you in the boob

You accidentally hit him in the balls

The types of girls they’d date

You’re on your period

How he reacts when you dye your hair

REQUEST!

Undesirable- Chapter 1/3

Originally posted by lets-be-a-queen

HALSEY- Trouble

I felt goosebumps graze my cheeks as the cold air brushed my face. Being a resident in Beacon Hills all my life, my heart fluttered at the sound of leaves crunching under my feet.  

This town was my home. It was where I met my friends, grew up, and discovered that it was crawling with the supernatural. To make things even better, I turned out to be a full-blooded siren. My parents initially didn’t want to have any kids for fear of a miscarriage. Since my mom was a siren and my dad was a werewolf, they didn’t want to take any chances- and then I came along. According to Dr. Deaton, I was “a miracle.”

Shaking my head out of the memories, I smiled when my eyes landed on the greatest thing in my life- Theo Raeken.

Theo and I met about 2 years ago when he first moved to Beacon Hills. Words couldn’t describe what I felt when I saw him. Everything he did made my heart beat a thousand miles per minute and thankfully, he felt the same way.

I found out that he was a werecoyote after I joined Scott’s pack. He discovered the hard way that sirens had a very low tolerance for people who flirted with their boyfriends.

As he pressed his lips against mine, I didn’t care that we probably looked like lovesick idiots in the middle of the parking lot.

“I missed you…” he murmured in my ear.

“You saw me yesterday,” I reminded jokingly.

“I know.” Kissing me again, his arm wrapped around my waist as we walked to class together.

“He’s bad news Y/N,” Stiles warned while the pack walked to lunch.

“You just don’t know him the way I do Stiles,” I reasoned. “Must you act so hostile towards him? He is my boyfriend after all. I would never treat Malia the way you treat him.”

“That’s because you’re friends with her and you like her. I am obviously not friends with him and even more obviously do not like him. At all.”

“I’m with Stiles on this one,” Scott said quietly, trying his best not to upset me.

“He doesn’t exactly make an excellent first impression. At least, to us,” Malia noted.

“It’s great that you two are together. We can all see that you’re genuinely happy,” Kira said to try and cheer me up.

“We just don’t know him well enough to let him into the pack Y/N. You- know that, right?” Lydia asked with pleading eyes.

“Yeah,” I sighed. “But please- just be nice to him? Everyone?”

They all agreed begrudgingly, nodding slightly.

After finishing our food and joking about Coach’s new vein in his forehead, we went back to class, my mind still lingering over everyone’s opinions about Theo.

Free at last. I ran upstairs and tossed my backpack onto the floor, not caring about the loads of homework I had due on Tuesday. Did I mention that 3-day weekends were God’s gift to mankind? And headphones of course.

Only 2 hours later did I find myself to be completely and utterly bored with absolutely nothing to do. Taking out my phone, I decided to call up Theo.

Ring

Ring

Ring

Ring

I’m sorry- the person you have called is currently unavailable. Please leave a message after the tone-

I narrowed my eyes in confusion- Theo always answers his phone. Then I dialed Lydia.

Ring

Ring

Ring

Ring

I’m sorry- the person you have called is currently unavailable. Please-

My confusion was cut short by a banging on the door downstairs. Just for safety purposes, I went downstairs with my training dagger in hand.

Opening the door my eyes were greeted by Malia, Stiles, Kira and Scott with worried expressions.

“Is Lydia here?” Scott asked with his voice in an anxious and gruff tone.

“I thought she was with you guys,” I responded, eyes wide and alarmed at the fact that she wasn’t answering her phone, nor was she with the pack.

“She’s not answering her phone either,” Malia panicked.

“Have you guys seen Theo?” the relationship part of my personality asked.

“We thought he was with you…” Kira trailed off.

“So Lydia and Theo are both missing?” Scott summed up.

“Shit,” Malia fumed.

“You don’t think that they-” I started.

“That their sudden disappearances are somehow linked together?” Stiles huffed sarcastically. “Of course not.”

“Um- guys?” Kira peeped. Holding up her phone, I almost screamed.

A picture was sent from a restricted number to Kira of Lydia- strapped into a chair, a metal helmet placed on her head and small plastic suction cups attached to her forehead.

You have 3 hours

Updated Masterlist 13/06/15

($) = Contains smut

Ashton

Calum

Luke

Michael

Series

1. Uni Series

2. Ready to Run (Cashton)

BLURBS:

He accidentally hits you in the boob

You accidentally hit him in the balls

The types of girls they’d date

You’re on your period

How he reacts when you dye your hair

You’re/he’s an exchange student

TEXTS:

Ashton: x / x

Calum: x

Luke: x

Michael:

REQUEST!

Just thinkin’ about Batfinger

Remember when he came up with elaborate plan to get Sansa out of King’s Landing, in which she got implicated for murder, and then decided to turn around and write to Roose fucking Bolton (who gets all his power from House Lannister) that he’s got undesirable #1 and hey let’s marry her to your son (who btw is ONLY a “Bolton” because of a decree from King Tommen AKA the second House Bolton goes against the throne, Ramsay’s back to being a bastard). Why? Because…“revenge.”

Remember when Batfinger said he was a gambling man who thought Stannis was going to win against Roose? But then he just plunked Sansa down in Winterfell anyway, because otherwise how could he possibly get Carol to agree to let him take troops there? It’s not as if she’s completely uninformed about what’s going on in the North, or that Batfinger could have just invaded after the battle anyway and then later been like, “they were plotting treason, Carol!” But like, apparently this plan was foolproof, it’s just that he didn’t do background research on Ramsay. Who would, amirite? It’s not like there was a trail of flayed bodies leading up to Winterfell.

Remember when Batfinger was “summoned” back to King’s Landing by Carol who then had literally nothing to tell him? And he negotiated a deal to become Warden of the North iff he kills Sansa? Which is so clearly what he wants to do and everything…

And then remember when Batfinger, after getting that deal from Carol, turns around and helps Olenna frame Carol for treason, making literally everything he just did completely moot?

I don’t really have a point; I’m just wondering how D&D possibly rationalized this to themselves. Because “chaos is a ladder”? They’re just too enamored with their own bullshit to even write a coherent plot.