please be gentle with yourself. you’re trying. if it’s taking you longer than you thought to achieve something or get somewhere that’s okay. try not to compare yourself to others too much because not everyone gets to where they need to be right away. you’re alive that’s what matters. keep trying. you’ll get there.
me, an intellectual and a borderline:
as children, borderlines often do not receive adequate love, affection, and attention from people who are supposed to give exactly that (such as parents, but there can also be other sources). as a result, we crave it as older people and feel that we must do Extra in order to earn it because doing Enough when we were young still didnt result in a substantial amount of validation. however, because borderlines are often also put down, ceaselessly criticized, and even possibly bullied or abused/neglected as children, we feel we dont deserve the attention we end up getting so we split on ourselves and spiral into self hate. which leads into another thing people seem to forget: borderlines feel emotions in the extreme, meaning we are not being manipulative when you ask how we are and we answer "dramatically" because thats truly how we feel. we are being honest about how "extreme" we feel and how we need attention and love now to make up for childhood trauma; we are not innately manipulative.
there’s a lot of misconceptions about asexual people and quick reminder that we’re in a spectrum. some of us are sex-repulsed, some of us are sex-positive, some of us love orgasms but only solo, some of us only want a relationship that isn’t sexual, some of us are cool with getting our partners off but don’t necessarily need it for us, some of us would be down with sex
on top of it: asexual
aromantic. someone who is asexual does not mean no romantic or sensual feelings! also it doesnt mean you can’t look at someone and find them aesthetically pleasing. what defines asexuality is not their labido either, but it’s “a lack of sexual attraction for someone”