the tragic tales

Old Wives’ Tales

Bathilda Bagshot leads Albus into her library. It is stuffy in the room, and bits of dust fly around in the afternoon light that is seeping through the thick curtains. 

“My boy, Albus Dumbledore is here to see you,” Bathilda calls before leaving the two alone.

Albus glances around the library in an effort to keep clear his head before responding. It’s a beautiful room, despite the dust and darkness, filled to the brim with books and knowledge. A stark contrast to the small stack of dated literature on a shelf in his own house…

Albus’s gaze finally slides back to Gellert at this, and he can’t manage to hide his mild surprise or amusement quite quick enough.

Albus: “The Tale of the Three Brothers”?

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Some particulars from my snapchat, chronicling the EPIC FUCKING DND GAME OF TONIGHT

Including this boss-ass diorama that @edwardinkhands, aka the world’s best DM, created, and the MOST TRAGICAL END TO A DRAGON-DAD, EVER.

RIP, Thaddeus, my (character’s) step-daddeus, aka Markender the Traitor, aka the meddler of the realm, aka the best foster-dragon-dad to both dragon and dad, ever in the realm of ebberon.

You’ll be missed, pops!


The Tragic Love Song of Destiny 


Harry Styles’ solo album might be the most anticipated debut this side of the millennium. Following years as the bullseye in the global behemoth that was One Direction, the singer is taking center stage with a self-titled effort that’s a classic cocktail of psychedelia, Britpop, and balladry. If it was a color, it would be the baby blue of Jimi Hendrix’s Fender Stratocaster or the soft pink of Mick Jagger’s suit when he performed on “Top Of The Pops” in 1971. It’s rock and it’s roll, but it’s also soft and sensitive. Produced by Jeff Bhasker (Kanye West, Fun.) it’s a record that could force the position of mainstream radio by ushering in a reprise of proper music — ensembles, verse-chorus-verse, rich instrumentation, or, basically, Adele’s bag of tricks.

Despite the red herring of lead single ‘Sign Of The Times’ (it clocks in at just under six minutes in length), the album is a short shrift 40 minutes and contains ten songs that are largely about women. Unlike Robbie Williams and Justin Timberlake before him, there’s a deepened millennial sensibility to being a leading man. Harry is a sensitive soul; A post-Drake phenomenon; A serious pop performer with enviable vocal chops and a gifted ability to convey a song’s emotional heft. He oozes class, ease and a sense of import without thrusting forth from the hips, or wreaking of a self-satisfied sense of boyband emancipation. Both respectful of his past and nervous for his future, “Harry Styles,” the album, looks both ways. - Variety

Read on for a track-by-track:

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““So there’s no more fuss
And there’s no more scenes
And my garden thrives–
You should see my nectarines!
But I’m telling you the same
I tell Kings and Queens:
Don’t ever never ever
Mess around with my greens!
Especially the beans.”

-The Witch, Into the Woods by Stephen Sondheim and Jame Lapine

yaknow I really wonder if what eventually became The Emoji Movie was in development before movies like Wreck-It Ralph and The Lego Movie came out, or maybe an animator at Sony saw WIR and thought “Man this is so inspiring, I’d love to make a film sort of like this. What kind of story could I tell about the characters that might live inside some more modern technology?”

optimistic about this idea they pitch it to their bosses, after all the studio’s been hitting it out of the park with Genndy Tartakovsky and his Hotel Transylvania movies lately. it gets the greenlight and starts development when suddenly The Lego Movie comes out and their bosses demand they make their lead female character like Wyldestyle. our animator friend tries to make a slightly similar character but each time it gets sent in for review the higher ups keep insisting to make her more and more similar, to the point where she becomes a little too similar, and there’s no arguing with orders from the top.

oh well, our animator friend thinks, maybe it won’t turn out so bad. after all the executives here are finally letting us make Smurfs: The Lost Village instead of those live action atrocities. they’ve definitely realized by now copying and trying to cash in on other popular movies like the live action Alvin and the Chipmunks is a bad idea right?

and then Inside Out comes out

and some corporate goon struts into our animator friend’s office and proudly proclaims “good news, buddy! your movie is now about emojis!” “um… emojis, sir?” “yes, emojis! yaknow those little face things when you send texts? I shouldn’t have to explain it to you you’re a millennial.” “I’m 32.” “right, right. anyway we got a lot of sponsorship tied up in this thing now… candy crush, facebook, dropbox… gotta say, great idea setting a film inside a smartphone! incredibly marketable!” “actually I wanted it to be inside a computer, kind of like this TV show I grew up with called ReBoot but modernized and–” “phone, computer, same thing these days right? they’ve all got apps and more importantly, in-app purchases! anyway you’ll have plenty of time to work on it now that we canceled Popeye!” “you WHAT?”

and so our poor dear animator friend resigned to their fate, dreading the day the critics’ screenings began, seeing their worst fears inevitably realized when the film just narrowly escaped 0% on rotten tomatoes. should this tragic tale indeed be true, let us hope with all our hearts that this animator eventually finds their way to pixar, disney or dreamworks instead, so they can take The Emoji Movie off their resume and put what must have been a traumatic and miserable time in their life behind them

so i’ve been making monthly fic recs for a full year now! that’s so insane to think about honestly. thanks for all the support! my first monthly fic rec was for april 2016 and it had 10 fics on it. now they have upwards of almost 30 fics. that’s character development. anyway…

here are a bunch of fics I’ve enjoyed and loved reading throughout the month of march. I recommend that you read these great fics in april, if you haven’t already. 

(all fics with a star are my favorites and if there are two stars then it was a favorite favorite)

1. Perfect Storm (80k)*

What do you do when your best friend asks you and your (now) ex to be the best men at his destination wedding? You can either tell him the truth, tell him you’re not together anymore, and deal with the consequences, or you can pretend you’re still together and roll with it, just pray you don’t spiral. Fake it ‘til you make it. You know, for the sake of the wedding.

Harry and Louis choose the latter.

2. The Night Sky is Changing Overhead (124k)**

Harry is a tattoo artist, Louis is a drama professor, and they meet during an argument at a café.

3. All I Wish Not to Remember (71k)**

What happens when all you had, all you loved, all you held dear is viciously ripped away from you? When your inner core, once filled with love and hope and light, blackens to raw, dark hatred?

What happens when your soul is hopelessly consumed and no matter how hard you try, no matter how hard you attempt to shake yourself out, to rid your tormented mind of the opaque feelings that plague you, all you can see, all you can feel, all you can want is…


A modern adaption of The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas. A tragic tale of timeless undying love, merciless revenge, and selfless sacrifice.

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anonymous asked:

What are your favourite Jyn/Cassian fics ?

Okay, so at first i tried to get this as short as possible? But i’ve read so many amazing fics these last 7 months, i couldn’t leave anything out. I added exactly 60 fics here (and i am pretty sure i forgot to put some i also loved). I’ve rec-ed several fics back in january too, you should also check them out (x) …sadly some of those WIP fics aren’t finished yet.

Anyway, i sorted these fics by rating: 

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Body and Soul
Billie Holiday
Body and Soul

What lies before me’s a future that’s stormy; a winter that’s gray and cold
Unless there’s magic, the end will be tragic and echo a tale that’s been told so often

My life revolves about you. What earthly good am I without you?
Oh, I tell you I mean it: I’m all for you body and soul

being mistakenly perceived as lgbt, accused of being lgbt, or otherwise insulted by comparison to lgbt people when you are not lgbt does not make you lgbt and is not oppression, and your tragic tale of how someone called you gay once is not going to win you favor with lgbt people

throwback thursday: friends w/ benefits

Some 2016 Friends with benefits fics! We all know how these are gonna end!

★=Fics that could use more kudos, comments, and appreciation.

Read every single word of this! Left me on the edge of my seat!: 

216 +1: Words To Say Instead Of I Love You by briggs / @grimegarage (18/18 | 28,420 | Explicit) 

Derek and Stiles have been best friends for fourteen years. They have their differences, sure, but it’s never been a question for them. Their friendship has been the most solid thing in their lives – until suddenly it isn’t anymore.

Funny how just a few choice words can through fourteen years of friendship off-balance.


a collection of “Bro, That’s Gay” one-shots that actually ended up turning into a concrete storyline.

This sad beautifully written fic is so under-appreciated! Seriously, left me weeping! So well done. Fucking phenomenal Needs more love!!!: 

★We wrote a story in the fog on the window that night… by KeepGoing (1/1 | 5,562 | Explicit) *PTSD*

This is the Stiles he wants to know. The Stiles few do know. Not the Lacrosse player. Not the man-eater. Just Stiles. With his sarcastic sense of humor and passion about things other than sports. Derek wonders and wants to ask why Stiles hides so much when who he really is is just so beautiful, but he doesn’t. He will save that for another time.

But as Derek inhales one last time before it all goes black he realizes there is no more time.

It’s a tragic tale and Derek almost laughs. His life had become so cliché and not how he intended it to go at all.

Fire stains and paints everything with color.

Definitely a favorite. The dynamic is perfect!: 

Snatches of Sound by @bleep0bleep​ and @petals42​​ (5/5 | 26,105 | Explicit)

Derek looks up to meet Stiles’ eyes, expecting to see a challenging smirk, some sort of derisive mocking expression, but Stiles just blinks at him, quirks his lips a little in a small smile, and Derek smiles back, just a little, and maybe this collaboration isn’t going to be so bad, after all.

In which Stiles and Derek are rival musicians who, somehow, through no fault of their own, are forced to work together.

Mega-angsty! Hurt my chest:  

These Woods Sigh by @blacktofade (1/1 | 80, 334 | Explicit) *mpreg*

Derek and Stiles never plan to start a family together, it just happens. Or, the one where Derek accidentally wishes for a baby.


tell me by @dragon-temeraire (1/1 | 1,217 | Explicit) 

This whole friends-with-benefits thing isn’t going quite the way Derek expected, and now he’s just trying to keep his secret.

“A fucking delight!”:  

it’s cool for the summer by @troubleiwant (1/1 | 7,845 | Mature) 

Stiles is absolutely sure about who he’s spending the rest of his life with, even though she kind of maybe broke up with him before her summer abroad. He’s still going to win her back. This fuck-buddies thing with Derek is just to pass the time.

Love On The Brain (m) || Prologue

∟ The Kim’s were a household your own family spoke of constantly but never in fond terms. They were deceitful, cunning and liars to the grave. Yet, when you meet Kim Namjoon, you find all these accusations to be anything but true. Still, if it pleased your family, you would keep your distance-and you tried. It was meant to be a one time deal, a quick fix for instant relief but as the weeks turn to months, you find yourself unable to stay away.

・namjoon x reader
・mob au; angst, smut, romance
warnings: semi-public sex
・ word count: 2,347

next part: one

Namjoon guides you to the dingy bathroom in the back corner of the nightclub, the lights of the small space dim and the floors questionably clean. You go with him, allow him to crowd you back against the stall door, eyes flickering down to watch as he slips the lock into place, as if sealing you both away from the outside world if only for the next ten minutes or so. It’s quiet, nothing but the soft sounds of breathing as he stands before you, a solid form dressed in dark jeans and a tight black shirt. The material, cotton you think as you reach forward to grasp it between your thumb and index finger, feels soft, pleasant to touch. You allow your mind to focus on the feel, easing the hint of anxiety that comes with these secret meetings before slowly drifting your gaze back up to meet his own.

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