the things i make late at night

Late night thoughts

There are so many things on my mind, so I’m just going to do bullet points because it makes more sense to me when I read it back. I’m doing this solely to process my thoughts a bit better.

• no one is ever going to tick all of your boxes and you’re delusional if you think you’ll find someone who does.
• I’m glad it didn’t take him long to work that out.
• I’m glad he talked to the people he talked to but at the same time I wish he’d talked to me before he said (typed) what he did.
• he said that the minute he pressed send, he regretted it.
• but at the same time, if he regretted it so quickly, why did he continue to say that it was for the best?
• I guess we only talked (texted) for a couple of hours in the morning before I stopped replying.
• after that, he had conversations with some friends of his, and his mum. Apparently his mum said he was a dickhead and men always ruin good things, or something along those lines. She told him to fix things with me.
• when we spoke on the phone yesterday afternoon, he told me that he thought he’d made the wrong decision. I told him I’d leave him be and give him time to think. But the next thing we were texting until late, and he was apologising and telling me that he hadn’t realised what I meant to him…
• I’m still fucking confused.
• I don’t understand why any of that had to happen.
• I keep reading that message he sent me and getting hurt all over again.
• he’s done such a turnaround…
• like now he’s talking about “the future”…
• like us living together… eventually.
• he wants to take me overseas at some point this year. Just the two of us…
• what the fuck…
• this is so fucking overwhelming at the moment.
• I want to be sure he’s doing this for the right reasons, not because he’s scared of being old and alone.
• I want him to be sure about me.
• I mean, I was convinced we were in an amazing place… until he sent me that message.
• and I’m fucking pissed off that he broke up with me via text.
• who the fuck does that?
• that made me feel so fucking worthless.
• but I’m glad he came to see me today.
• he kept saying I looked so unsure of myself today.
• I was. I don’t feel comfortable with where I stand. I don’t know what to think. I don’t know what to believe.
• yesterday fucking threw me in a BIG way.
• how am I supposed to trust my gut?
• how am I supposed to just go with the flow now and not just expect shit to be fucked up again?
• I’m most definitely going to expect this to happen again.
• it doesn’t feel stable like it did before.
• I don’t feel good enough
• I don’t feel like I have anything to offer him.
• I do want a future with him. I want that so much.
• but I want to feel like he chose me because he wants me. Not because I’ll do. Like, I’m close enough.
• I’m so confused.
• fuck. Maybe I should email this to him or something.
• fuck my brain.

anonymous asked:

You can still cheat on a person without being physical. Late night texts, always thinking about the said person, using them as a shoulder to lean on, is called emotional cheating and is ultimately considered flat out cheating. You may not think you cheated but you did. Cheating is wrong. If you don't like the relationship that you are currently in, you break it off with that person, not keep stringing them along while you are growing emotionally attached to someone else.

How do you personally know that I did any of these things? I texted numerous friends late at night - not just Alycia - is that considered cheating? In most cases, I texted them about veterinary stuff. Is that deemed appropriate in your all knowing eyes? Is going to a friend when you need some support through a difficult time cheating? If so, then we’re all guilty of that. Stop making assumptions when you have no solid basis for your accusations.

jackbaettillo  asked:

but what if Michael has this thing where he pops his fangs when he's scared so geoff, who constantly wants to see them and does everything to see them at all times EXCEPT ask, jumps round corners and sneaks up on Michael and Michael figures him out p soon so he pretends to be scared and late one quiet night, Michaels like "you can just ask to see my fangs dude u don't gotta make up all these excuses" and geoff flushes and goes "shit well okay" and Michael just defaults to fangs out all the time

YES GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!

I need to start using the word ‘joyful’ more. I mean… I can talk about feeling ‘happy.’ I can say that being with my sweethearts makes me ‘happy’ but sometimes it doesn’t? Sometimes things are hard. Sometimes when I’m with them we have to tackle some really tough things and it’s not any fun whatsoever.

But still, even when things are full of hardship and pain having a deep friend I can rely on and be close to is a good thing and making it through a difficult time in our life together gives a sense of wholeness and… joy.

So yeah… Joyful. I think I need to start using it more often.

Personal Note 2

Ok after a good cry and a very late night cuddle with my husband who I woke up, I am feeling better. I also think I am slightly bummed over my birthday next week. I usually have plans for the whole week and I don’t this year. 

I am going to slow down.  I am going to move my reading list to Friday. I was able to get it out on Thursday because I had Wednesday (my day off) to work on it. My days off have changed. I am now off Thursday so that will make things a little easier. I am probably going to do far less searches than I was doing before and only stick to people I follow for now. 

Mood boards are still going to be done but I am going to space them out and I am going to do a couple that I have been wanting to do first. So have no fear my faithful followers I will still get them out. 

Thank you for all the kinds words last night/early this morning. I so appreciate it. Part of why I was crying. I was so overwhelmed by the support. You all are the best. 

Originally posted by nyxisis

Voicemail-Goodnight
Voicemail-Goodnight

Otabek: Uh…hey, Yura. I just wanted to let you know it’s going to be a late night tonight. I miss you, I’ll see you first thing tomorrow morning. Don’t stay up too late, and remember to finish your homework before bed. I love you, dobroy nochi!

In which Otabek calls to let Yuri know that it will be a late night, and make sure he is being a responsible student.

Note: Yes I did two of these, but I like this one better so I deleted the other. Enjoy <3 Please let me know if you have any requests!

anonymous asked:

(1) I feel like almost all of my friends are leaving me. They're all dating someone and have worries about getting caught making out or sneaking out to each others houses in the middle of the night and smoking weed and i'm worried about whether or not i'll be able to get homework done. Im only in 8th grade and I feel like all of them are rushing things and i'm falling behind but I still can't help that ive been feeling really lonely lately. I just feel as though I have no one to truly talk to.

and I just feel like they’d rather smoke pot in a street in the middle of the night together instead of having an actual conversation with me when I need it. thanks

sweetheart, people change. it sucks a lot especially at this age because these are people that you have been growing with.

friends grow apart but in their absence you learn about yourself. you become a newer version of you. you find friends in that mesh well with this you.

you grow with them. you bond. you learn again. it continues.

i know it seems dark now but light will come again. you can make it through this. we are with you. you are not alone.

stay strong and stay alive.

things I want but will never ask for:

- you to text me first
- blowing up my phone bc you miss me
- forehead kisses
- back rubs - hugs from behind
- calling me “your girl”
- sending me songs that make you think of me
- playing with my hair while I fall asleep - “did you remember to…” texts
- holding my hand all the time
- morning sex
- reassurance that you love me
- dancing in the kitchen
- late night talks about life
- silly pictures
- breakfast dates

that kind of love that’s “i was scared until i found you.” that kind of love that’s worth it to try romance again. the “fuck i’ll try cheesy if it just makes you smile” love, the roses and love notes and wine bottles. the twinkle light love, the “let’s go on this romantic date only to spend the whole thing being silly” love, the dancing badly to slow songs love, the “i don’t know how you make me laugh so much but seriously stop it i’m trying to drive” love. the “i trust you love,” calling late at night because a secret just welled up in my throat love, the first person i talk to so i can figure out this decision is you kind of love. the “i was hurt before and had given up but then i found you” love, the incredulous in-awe love, the wonder love, the are you actually real or am i dreaming you love. the “i didn’t believe in soulmates before you” love. that kinda love.

Tyrus Wong, whose watercolors helped define the look of Bambi, died Friday, Dec. 30. He was 106.

Like most animation fans, I first heard of Tyrus Wong via his work on Bambi. Legend has it, that’s the first time Walt Disney heard of him, too!

Okay, so the story goes…

Walt was chomping at the bit to make Bambi, only he was having trouble finding the ‘look’ he wanted for the film. He’d tried ultra-realism, but nixed it. He switched to super cartoony, but again, nope. It was beginning to look like the film would get shelved until late one night, while wandering through his studio, Disney happened upon a small stack of unusual watercolors. They were by a fella named ‘Wong,’ and they were…well, different.



What do I mean by ‘different’? Well, for one thing, these watercolors were tiny. Most of them measured no more than 4″ x 5″. And where the rest of the studio’s painters tried to pack as much detail into each picture as possible, Wong’s paintings were sparse, vague — almost suggestions. Wong would later say, “I tried to keep the thing very, very simple and create the atmosphere, the feeling of the forest.”



It worked. Walt was so impressed with what he saw that the very next day he promoted Wong from his job as an in-betweener (kind of like an animation line cook) to concept artist (think: Michelin rated chef)! Not only that, but Wong’s watercolors came to define the look of Bambi‘s backgrounds, providing the film with its sensitive, poetic and often ethereal mood.



After working at Disney, Wong moved on to Warner Bros. There he provided production art for quite a few live-action classics, including Rebel Without A Cause, The Wild Bunch and Sands of Iwo Jima. He also did freelance commercial work, where his gorgeous watercolor and calligraphic art came to adorn everything from greeting cards to high end pottery.



After retiring, Wong began making kites. Not your typical, four-cornered diamond shaped kites, but HUGE, ornamental, multifaceted kites in the shape of dragons, centipedes, flocks of birds and swarms of butterflys.



Upon first discovering Wong’s work fifteen years ago, I wrote him a number of gushing — and probably pretty embarrassing — fan letters. Wong responded to each and every one of them graciously.



I still have the envelope from his first response, where he drew a small, singing bird in pastels, sitting atop my name. (See above.) Another time, I literally teared up when I opened my mailbox to find a Christmas card that Wong had designed decades earlier. It was a winter scene, featuring a mother deer and her young buck. Inside, Wong not only signed it with his English name, but also embossed it with a red stamp bearing the Chinese characters for his name! Needless to say, I treasure both of these items to this day.


  

All of this rambling is really just my way of honoring a man whose work has meant so much to so many. I hope he knew how truly appreciated his wonderful work was.

R.I.P. Tyrus Wong  (Oct. 25, 1910  - Dec. 30, 2016)

still your gushing fan,

Ju-osh M.

Say no to bad dates, bad friends, and bad ideas. Stop going out when you’d rather stay in. Don’t do things that make you unhappy. But don’t be afraid to say yes to spontaneous nights out, new adventures, and facing your fears. Because it’s true what they say, life is short, and it’s passing you by right now while you read this. So if there’s anything you want to change in your life don’t wait. This is your moment.
—  If you’re waiting for a sign this is it.

27(?)/30

read all 30 days

2

@magigirljane first kis

Sleep Starters
  • “How late were you up last night?”
  • “You’re not pulling another all-nighter, not if I can do anything about it.”
  • “Aren’t you cold? I can go get you some blankets!”
  • “Are you alright? I thought I heard you talking in your sleep.”
  • “Don’t worry, you’re alright. It was just another nightmare.”
  • “I don’t want to get up!”-“You can’t make me go to bed!”
  • “Can you turn your music down? Some of us are trying to sleep!”
  • “That looks highly uncomfortable. How do you even sleep like that?!”
  • “I didn’t mean to wake you up…”
  • “Don’t you think it’s getting awful late?”
  • “Sweet dreams!”
  • “I didn’t get a wink of sleep last night.”
  • “You said some interesting things in your sleep last night.”
  • “Did you have another bad dream?”
  • “Come on, let’s just go to sleep.”
  • “You look exhausted. Did you get any sleep last night?”

Happy Holidays!!

Find yourself the nearest Light Bulb of Unusual Color and make a wish!

Hoping you’re surrounded by those you love and are staying warm!

Love is not posting pictures online and sending long messages every night so you know I appreciate you. Love is not talking every day just so we are not going to forget we both care. Yes, it is great to do those things when you love someone, but it should not be something that you need. Love is, not talking all day and knowing you still love someone and nothing will change it. Love is, when you go out late and call me when you get home even though I am asleep because you know how much I worry. Love is, when you stop making up excuses and admit you did something wrong and apologizing for your mistakes and try not to do them again. Love is, “please get your homework done so you can get the job you want and be happy in the future”. That is love. Love is, “let’s go to bed we both need rest and I don’t want to go without you”. Love is, “I know you’re out watching the sunset because you’re upset, and I’m really sorry. But I’m upset too and would like you to go home so you can FaceTime me.” And then leaving my favorite thing because you will always be a priority to me. Love is not always the big things that everyone else will notice, but the small things that are not going to be noticed by anyone except each other. I do not need extravagant to mean love. I need you.
—  For you